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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,844 --> 00:00:09,144 ♪ I was born in Kansas ♪ 2 00:00:09,213 --> 00:00:11,379 ♪ I was bred in Kansas ♪ 3 00:00:11,448 --> 00:00:13,816 ♪ And when I get married ♪ 4 00:00:13,885 --> 00:00:16,017 ♪ I'll be wed in Kansas ♪ 5 00:00:16,086 --> 00:00:18,486 ♪ There's a true blue gal ♪ 6 00:00:18,555 --> 00:00:20,684 ♪ Who promised she would wait ♪ 7 00:00:20,753 --> 00:00:22,924 ♪ She's a sun, sunflower ♪ 8 00:00:22,993 --> 00:00:25,060 ♪ From the sunflower state ♪ 9 00:00:25,129 --> 00:00:27,663 ♪ She's a sunflower ♪ 10 00:00:27,732 --> 00:00:29,965 ♪ She's my sunflower ♪ 11 00:00:30,034 --> 00:00:32,968 ♪ And I know we'll never part ♪ 12 00:00:33,037 --> 00:00:34,103 ♪ Ooh, ooh... ♪ 13 00:00:34,172 --> 00:00:36,706 - So many hotties out today. - Joel: Yeah. 14 00:00:37,942 --> 00:00:40,508 - You see that guy? - Yeah, I see him. 15 00:00:40,577 --> 00:00:43,912 - Slim-fit, high-waisted jean? - Uh-huh, it certainly is. 16 00:00:43,981 --> 00:00:46,982 - And a sensible sneaker. - Oh, yes, ma'am. 17 00:00:47,051 --> 00:00:49,251 Usually not my thing, but I'll pound it. 18 00:00:49,320 --> 00:00:50,886 Oh, I'm gonna pound it, too. 19 00:00:50,955 --> 00:00:53,288 What about this? 20 00:00:53,357 --> 00:00:56,391 Leather jacket on an unseasonably warm day? 21 00:00:56,460 --> 00:00:58,393 Oh, he was big in the '80s. 22 00:00:58,462 --> 00:01:00,395 But at least we know he doesn't mind getting sweaty, right? 23 00:01:00,464 --> 00:01:02,130 - Exactly! - I kinda like that. 24 00:01:02,199 --> 00:01:04,199 - Yeah, pound it! - Pound it! 25 00:01:04,268 --> 00:01:06,001 I want somebody to be just as sweaty as I am. 26 00:01:06,070 --> 00:01:07,669 I wanna know they're putting in the fuckin' work. 27 00:01:09,707 --> 00:01:12,207 Oh, 10,000. Done! 28 00:01:12,276 --> 00:01:14,309 Oh God, 29 00:01:14,378 --> 00:01:16,311 how can we get our steps every single day, 30 00:01:16,380 --> 00:01:18,646 and yet my pants are still tight? 31 00:01:18,715 --> 00:01:21,616 I don't know. Maybe you oughta get on that elastic band life. 32 00:01:21,685 --> 00:01:24,356 Then you never really know what's goin' on. - 33 00:01:26,223 --> 00:01:27,456 - Seriously? - You seeing this? 34 00:01:27,525 --> 00:01:29,992 I mean, that, that's disgusting. 35 00:01:30,061 --> 00:01:31,193 I bet he wakes up every morning 36 00:01:31,262 --> 00:01:32,560 and gives her a sweet little kiss 37 00:01:32,629 --> 00:01:34,296 right on the tip of her clitoris. - 38 00:01:34,364 --> 00:01:36,866 - Gross. Sam! - What? 39 00:01:36,935 --> 00:01:38,966 Ah... 40 00:01:39,035 --> 00:01:40,931 - Hey, Trish. - Tricia: Hey, you gotta meet me. 41 00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:42,270 - I have Dad's list. - Like, right now? 42 00:01:42,339 --> 00:01:43,472 I'm kinda in the middle of someth-- 43 00:01:43,541 --> 00:01:44,672 Tricia: Meet me in an hour 44 00:01:44,741 --> 00:01:46,008 and please do not keep me waiting 'cause 45 00:01:46,077 --> 00:01:48,177 - I have like 600,000-- - I'll be there! 46 00:01:48,246 --> 00:01:50,345 - Fuckin' Tricia. - Mm. 47 00:01:50,414 --> 00:01:52,647 You know what she would never do? - What? 48 00:01:52,716 --> 00:01:55,818 She'd never play "pound it or pass." - Her loss. 49 00:01:55,887 --> 00:01:58,819 Seriously. Like, look at that guy. 50 00:01:58,888 --> 00:02:01,323 Well you know he loves poetry. - Joel: Yeah. 51 00:02:01,392 --> 00:02:04,626 Really, really, really enjoys infomercials. 52 00:02:04,695 --> 00:02:07,696 Oh, can't wait to tell you about his day. - Yeah. 53 00:02:07,765 --> 00:02:09,164 Hates Cher. 54 00:02:09,233 --> 00:02:11,967 - No, he doe-- Who hates Cher? - I mean, this guy. 55 00:02:12,036 --> 00:02:14,236 - Oh, well, then pass. - Pass?! 56 00:02:14,305 --> 00:02:15,370 Sam: I'm not pounding that. 57 00:02:15,439 --> 00:02:17,873 Oh, you coulda had it so good. 58 00:02:17,942 --> 00:02:20,412 Where is Roger? He's late today. 59 00:02:21,780 --> 00:02:23,215 There he is. 60 00:02:24,410 --> 00:02:25,484 Oh. 61 00:02:26,851 --> 00:02:28,150 Okay. 62 00:02:28,219 --> 00:02:29,854 I'm glad he's okay. 63 00:02:32,222 --> 00:02:34,326 You did the right thing. 64 00:02:38,362 --> 00:02:41,263 - Wanna do another lap? - Why would we do that? 65 00:02:41,332 --> 00:02:44,366 - It'll be fun. - No, it won't. 66 00:02:44,435 --> 00:02:48,369 Okay, we can just go back to the car. - Okay, you ready? 67 00:02:48,438 --> 00:02:51,573 Well, first, can I just tell you something? 68 00:02:51,642 --> 00:02:54,642 - No. Joel... - Well, since we don't have time to do another lap, 69 00:02:54,711 --> 00:02:57,679 - I have time to say this. - No, no, please. Joel. 70 00:02:57,748 --> 00:03:00,115 Don't do it. Don't ruin this moment, please. 71 00:03:00,184 --> 00:03:01,784 I really love you. 72 00:03:01,853 --> 00:03:03,552 Joel. Joel! 73 00:03:03,621 --> 00:03:05,253 Sam: Come on. 74 00:03:05,322 --> 00:03:07,054 I'm doing another lap! You got me! 75 00:03:07,123 --> 00:03:09,357 - Joel: I love you. - Sam: You know I don't have the infrastructure 76 00:03:09,426 --> 00:03:11,794 to go this fast! Stop talking! - I love you! 77 00:03:21,472 --> 00:03:23,171 Tricia: I mean, I don't know why he sent this to me. 78 00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:24,406 You're the one who told him to go. 79 00:03:24,475 --> 00:03:26,040 Sam: Well, you're the responsible one. 80 00:03:26,109 --> 00:03:28,404 Tricia: Didn't you teach him how to use a cell phone? - Sam: I did, 81 00:03:28,473 --> 00:03:31,313 but I-I don't know. I guess it didn't work. - Tricia: Guess not. 82 00:03:31,382 --> 00:03:33,748 Alright, well, this is all good. 83 00:03:33,817 --> 00:03:35,718 Uh, "Made it to the airport in plenty of time. 84 00:03:35,787 --> 00:03:38,320 Had an aisle seat." That's fascinating. 85 00:03:38,389 --> 00:03:40,222 "Made friends with the stewardess." - Of course. 86 00:03:40,291 --> 00:03:42,357 Um... 87 00:03:42,426 --> 00:03:44,293 "Wish you girls could see the boat. 88 00:03:44,362 --> 00:03:46,195 "Uncle Frank really restored it good. 89 00:03:46,264 --> 00:03:48,363 "Grilling up steaks tonight. 90 00:03:48,432 --> 00:03:50,769 Setting sail tomorrow morning." 91 00:03:53,270 --> 00:03:54,870 Okay, here's our to-do list. 92 00:03:54,939 --> 00:03:56,738 - It's extensive. - Fuck. 93 00:03:56,807 --> 00:03:59,074 "Number one, visit your mother every day." 94 00:03:59,143 --> 00:04:01,542 Let's start that one tomorrow. 95 00:04:01,611 --> 00:04:05,514 "Put in storm windows, vacuum, feed chickens, mow lawn, 96 00:04:05,583 --> 00:04:08,550 check sump pump, clean out barn." 97 00:04:08,619 --> 00:04:11,654 I-I can't-- I cannot deal with this right now! 98 00:04:11,723 --> 00:04:13,688 I just can't! I mean, I gotta go. 99 00:04:13,757 --> 00:04:15,657 I gotta go to work, gotta pack Shannon up. I mean-- 100 00:04:15,726 --> 00:04:17,959 - Okay, alright. - This was your idea anyway! I hate farming. 101 00:04:18,028 --> 00:04:21,261 We're not farming, Tricia! We're unfarming! - 102 00:04:21,700 --> 00:04:23,231 And... 103 00:04:23,300 --> 00:04:24,366 Come on. Aren't you glad 104 00:04:24,435 --> 00:04:26,038 he's finally doing something for himself? 105 00:04:27,972 --> 00:04:31,406 Well... the timing sucks. 106 00:04:31,475 --> 00:04:33,841 Alright. I'm gonna come by later to say goodbye to Shannon. 107 00:04:33,910 --> 00:04:35,843 - Tricia: Okay. - I wanna give her some of my old KU shirts. 108 00:04:35,912 --> 00:04:38,517 - Okay. - She didn't tell you I got her a fake ID, did she? 109 00:04:40,417 --> 00:04:42,184 I mean, I'm pretty sure you're kidding, but... 110 00:04:42,253 --> 00:04:44,152 I'm kidding. 111 00:04:44,221 --> 00:04:45,657 But I did tell her where to get one. 112 00:04:48,159 --> 00:04:49,459 You're not funny. 113 00:04:49,528 --> 00:04:50,963 I think it's funny. 114 00:04:57,734 --> 00:05:01,137 Of course, you were talking to your neighbor. 115 00:05:02,974 --> 00:05:04,505 I gotta clear out the barn. 116 00:05:04,574 --> 00:05:06,842 Remind me, I need to get trash bags. - Joel: Mm. 117 00:05:06,911 --> 00:05:09,277 Oh, fuck, you know what? I already made a list. 118 00:05:09,346 --> 00:05:12,047 Why can't I remember anything anymore? 119 00:05:12,116 --> 00:05:14,049 - Menopause? - Perimenopause. 120 00:05:14,118 --> 00:05:16,385 - What's the difference? - Fuck, nobody knows. 121 00:05:17,954 --> 00:05:20,688 It should be an easy flip. It's just like an older couple. 122 00:05:20,757 --> 00:05:23,758 They're real sweet, in town for the game. 123 00:05:23,827 --> 00:05:26,362 And I locked up all of my crystal in the owner's closet. 124 00:05:26,431 --> 00:05:29,198 - Lesson learned. - Good. 125 00:05:29,267 --> 00:05:30,800 I can't believe I let you cut my hair. 126 00:05:30,869 --> 00:05:34,536 Oh, but it's so... kitty. 127 00:05:34,605 --> 00:05:37,272 - It is kitty, right? Kitty. - So kitty. I'd pound that. 128 00:05:37,341 --> 00:05:40,475 - Hey. - Here's your hazelnut and soy milk latte for your husband. 129 00:05:40,544 --> 00:05:41,944 Oh, here you go, honey. 130 00:05:42,013 --> 00:05:44,546 Kisses. 131 00:05:44,615 --> 00:05:47,048 We better get you home. I know the caffeine gets you horny. 132 00:05:47,117 --> 00:05:48,016 Oh yeah. 133 00:05:48,085 --> 00:05:50,085 ♪ I'm just soaking wet ♪ 134 00:05:50,154 --> 00:05:52,254 ♪ Oh, I'm so wet, oh ♪ 135 00:05:52,323 --> 00:05:55,558 ♪ So fucking wet, ow-ow, watch out! ♪ 136 00:06:05,903 --> 00:06:08,140 - Should we do our stretches? - Yeah. 137 00:06:11,776 --> 00:06:13,342 One, two, three. 138 00:06:16,213 --> 00:06:17,445 Ugh, I really wish tonight 139 00:06:17,514 --> 00:06:19,680 wasn't a designated non-drinking night. 140 00:06:19,749 --> 00:06:22,684 What are you talking about? We just had two DNDNs in a row. 141 00:06:22,753 --> 00:06:24,319 - We did? - Yeah! It's definitely time for a DN, 142 00:06:24,388 --> 00:06:25,353 unless you cheated. 143 00:06:25,422 --> 00:06:27,588 Joel, I would never! 144 00:06:27,657 --> 00:06:30,359 Okay, then. Let's go out, you know? 145 00:06:30,428 --> 00:06:32,960 Go downtown, take your mind off things. 146 00:06:33,029 --> 00:06:36,098 My friend Carla, from yoga, she said that-- - Oh, my God, Joel! 147 00:06:36,167 --> 00:06:38,999 You know I hate when you talk about your yoga friends. 148 00:06:39,068 --> 00:06:42,370 I know, but she's different. She's-- - Oh, stop! NNP, Joel. 149 00:06:42,439 --> 00:06:43,904 - What's NNP? - No new people! 150 00:06:43,973 --> 00:06:46,341 Especially somebody that can touch their nose to their twat. 151 00:06:46,410 --> 00:06:48,810 It's not natural. 152 00:06:48,879 --> 00:06:51,146 But she's different. She's pregnant. - Oh, strike two. 153 00:06:53,283 --> 00:06:55,584 I will never give her a chance. 154 00:06:55,653 --> 00:06:57,852 - Joel: They left it unlocked. - Sam: Oh, that's good. 155 00:06:57,921 --> 00:07:01,356 - Yo! Oh! Sam! Oh, my God! - Ah! What the fuck is this? 156 00:07:01,425 --> 00:07:03,992 Joel: There is a clear no-pet policy. 157 00:07:04,061 --> 00:07:06,562 Sam: Oof. Can't believe you stepped in it. - Joel: I know. 158 00:07:06,631 --> 00:07:08,396 The smell is living in my nose. 159 00:07:08,465 --> 00:07:10,599 I don't know if I can come back from this. 160 00:07:10,668 --> 00:07:12,567 Oh, Joel, we're burning those shoes tonight. 161 00:07:12,636 --> 00:07:14,537 These are my good step shoes! 162 00:07:14,606 --> 00:07:16,841 Not anymore. 163 00:07:18,843 --> 00:07:20,341 What about this? 164 00:07:20,410 --> 00:07:23,011 You think pa-pah counts as organic matter? 165 00:07:23,080 --> 00:07:24,679 Oh yeah. 166 00:07:24,748 --> 00:07:27,683 Hey, Steve! Does this stuff work on dog shit? 167 00:07:27,752 --> 00:07:29,352 - You got a mess? - Joel: Steve, 168 00:07:29,421 --> 00:07:31,219 it's really bad. 169 00:07:31,288 --> 00:07:33,456 It's really bad. 170 00:07:33,525 --> 00:07:36,458 Yeah, that should do it. 171 00:07:36,527 --> 00:07:38,527 - Let's load it up. - Alright. 172 00:07:38,596 --> 00:07:40,262 I'm getting at least two. 173 00:07:40,331 --> 00:07:42,364 - One more. - Okay. 174 00:07:42,433 --> 00:07:44,033 Do you think they have snacks here? 175 00:07:44,102 --> 00:07:47,203 Oh, they do, actually. I do know that for a fact. - Oh. 176 00:08:10,962 --> 00:08:12,197 Fuck. 177 00:08:14,966 --> 00:08:16,969 Oh, my God... 178 00:08:18,168 --> 00:08:19,604 Holy shit. 179 00:08:27,845 --> 00:08:30,115 I ain't got nowhere to put it. 180 00:08:33,451 --> 00:08:35,887 Ah, fuck. 181 00:09:21,533 --> 00:09:23,969 Oh. 182 00:09:46,290 --> 00:09:49,094 Alright. Well... 183 00:09:50,194 --> 00:09:51,796 think this is it. 184 00:09:54,065 --> 00:09:57,365 - Oh boy. Yeah? - Okay, one thing. 185 00:09:57,434 --> 00:10:00,034 I hate the sign. I don't really want that shit in my dorm room. 186 00:10:00,103 --> 00:10:02,899 Oh, excuse me. That is the shit that paid for your dorm room, 187 00:10:02,968 --> 00:10:04,440 so it stays. 188 00:10:04,509 --> 00:10:06,045 Okay, fine. 189 00:10:07,611 --> 00:10:09,372 You know, it just seems like yesterday 190 00:10:09,441 --> 00:10:11,980 we were dropping you off at kindergarten. 191 00:10:12,049 --> 00:10:13,549 Mom... 192 00:10:13,618 --> 00:10:15,317 Shan, I'm just so proud of you. 193 00:10:15,386 --> 00:10:16,985 You're just the best kid. 194 00:10:17,054 --> 00:10:19,054 Oh, you look gorgeous for your first day! 195 00:10:19,123 --> 00:10:20,588 I can't stand it. 196 00:10:20,657 --> 00:10:23,325 Okay, let me just get one more picture, okay? 197 00:10:23,394 --> 00:10:24,829 You pose right here. 198 00:10:27,031 --> 00:10:30,269 One second. Let me get this thing open. 199 00:10:31,636 --> 00:10:34,403 - Alright, ready? - Okay. 200 00:10:34,472 --> 00:10:35,771 Smile! 201 00:10:35,840 --> 00:10:38,310 - So cute. - Hey, send it to Dad. 202 00:10:39,243 --> 00:10:41,443 Okay, yeah. 203 00:10:41,512 --> 00:10:43,644 - Actually, no, you could just-- - Oh, no, no, it's fine. 204 00:10:43,713 --> 00:10:45,948 - I'll send it to him. - No, send it to me. I can send it to him. 205 00:10:46,017 --> 00:10:48,584 Nope. Already sent. 206 00:10:48,653 --> 00:10:50,385 Easy. 207 00:10:50,454 --> 00:10:52,788 - Not a big deal. - Okay. 208 00:10:52,857 --> 00:10:54,623 Alright. Let me get it together. 209 00:10:54,692 --> 00:10:56,692 Should we go? You ready? 210 00:10:56,761 --> 00:10:58,560 Yeah, I guess. 211 00:10:58,629 --> 00:11:00,395 - I'm not ready, but. - Yeah. 212 00:11:00,464 --> 00:11:02,298 - Should we get a coffee first? - We'll get coffee. 213 00:11:02,367 --> 00:11:05,070 Okay. 214 00:11:31,423 --> 00:11:33,028 - Joel: Hey! - Hey. 215 00:11:33,097 --> 00:11:35,430 Joel: Well, I think I finally got the shit smell out. 216 00:11:35,499 --> 00:11:38,366 You can maybe smell it, but you have to really, really try. 217 00:11:38,435 --> 00:11:41,397 How's it going up there? You ready for the renters? 218 00:11:41,466 --> 00:11:43,703 Yeah, I'm getting there. 219 00:11:46,611 --> 00:11:48,247 Joel: You okay? 220 00:11:49,314 --> 00:11:50,950 No. 221 00:11:53,685 --> 00:11:55,921 Just, um... 222 00:11:57,021 --> 00:11:59,120 feels really weird to be here 223 00:11:59,189 --> 00:12:01,426 with all of his stuff, you know? 224 00:12:03,728 --> 00:12:06,027 I... 225 00:12:06,096 --> 00:12:09,459 I mean, I wanted him to go, and I pushed him to go, and I'm... 226 00:12:09,528 --> 00:12:11,032 and I'm glad he went because I know 227 00:12:11,101 --> 00:12:12,634 that he couldn't have cleaned out this barn. 228 00:12:12,703 --> 00:12:14,339 It would've broken his heart. 229 00:12:17,475 --> 00:12:19,444 But, I didn't... 230 00:12:21,345 --> 00:12:24,416 I didn't know it'd break mine, and, um... 231 00:12:28,319 --> 00:12:30,750 Just sitting here, Joel, and he... 232 00:12:33,491 --> 00:12:35,260 he's everywhere. 233 00:12:39,263 --> 00:12:41,664 Every inch of this place is... 234 00:12:41,733 --> 00:12:43,802 him, you know? 235 00:12:47,271 --> 00:12:49,909 He loved this place. 236 00:12:51,008 --> 00:12:52,844 And now, I'm just... 237 00:12:54,145 --> 00:12:57,413 I just feel like I'm packing up his whole life, 238 00:12:57,482 --> 00:12:59,051 and, um... 239 00:13:02,887 --> 00:13:04,823 God... 240 00:13:05,623 --> 00:13:08,891 Yeah, it just-- just sucks. 241 00:13:08,960 --> 00:13:11,030 Joel: Do you want me to come out there? 242 00:13:14,666 --> 00:13:16,535 No, just, um... 243 00:13:18,703 --> 00:13:20,940 just sit with me for a minute. 244 00:13:23,675 --> 00:13:25,310 Joel: Okay. 245 00:13:44,963 --> 00:13:47,430 Maybe I'm just a little tired. 246 00:13:49,434 --> 00:13:51,333 I don't know. 247 00:13:51,402 --> 00:13:55,103 You know, facing all this family shit without a cocktail. 248 00:13:55,172 --> 00:13:58,408 Joel: I can be out there with a shaker in 15 minutes. 249 00:13:58,477 --> 00:14:00,342 No, no, no. 250 00:14:00,411 --> 00:14:03,048 No. No. 251 00:14:04,449 --> 00:14:06,185 Thank you. 252 00:14:10,520 --> 00:14:13,358 Joel: You're doing good by him. You really are. 253 00:14:14,219 --> 00:14:15,460 Thank you. 254 00:14:37,782 --> 00:14:41,987 Oh, my fucking... God! 255 00:15:35,240 --> 00:15:36,475 Hi. 256 00:15:38,610 --> 00:15:40,842 Um, Mary Jo Miller? 257 00:15:40,911 --> 00:15:42,945 Oh, I'm sure you've got stories. 258 00:15:43,014 --> 00:15:44,680 Yeah. Is she in her room? 259 00:15:44,749 --> 00:15:46,986 - Yeah. You'll hear her. - Thanks. 260 00:16:11,576 --> 00:16:13,475 Oh! Didn't see you there. 261 00:16:13,544 --> 00:16:16,111 MJ, you have a visitor. 262 00:16:16,180 --> 00:16:19,548 Hey, Mom! I was worried I was gonna miss you. 263 00:16:19,617 --> 00:16:20,848 What are you doing here? 264 00:16:20,917 --> 00:16:23,585 Well, I wanted to visit you, and Dad wanted to make sure 265 00:16:23,654 --> 00:16:25,053 that you have plenty of clean underwear, 266 00:16:25,122 --> 00:16:26,154 so there's some in the drawer, 267 00:16:26,223 --> 00:16:27,389 and I put a little up here, too, okay? 268 00:16:27,458 --> 00:16:29,390 That shithead burnt my house down. 269 00:16:29,459 --> 00:16:31,259 No, Mom. No, he didn't. 270 00:16:31,328 --> 00:16:35,296 - Yes, he did. - No, he didn't. 271 00:16:35,365 --> 00:16:38,033 Have... Have you been smoking? 272 00:16:38,102 --> 00:16:40,063 Has she been smoking? 273 00:16:40,132 --> 00:16:42,471 - Nothing we can do about it. - What are you doing, Mom? 274 00:16:42,540 --> 00:16:45,007 You don't smoke. What's that about? 275 00:16:46,978 --> 00:16:49,311 Okay. 276 00:16:49,380 --> 00:16:51,647 Is there anything else I can bring for you tomorrow? 277 00:16:51,716 --> 00:16:53,948 - No. - Okay. 278 00:16:54,017 --> 00:16:57,319 Well, I'll see you tomorrow, and just... - 279 00:16:57,388 --> 00:16:59,589 You know, thank you. I guess. 280 00:17:01,158 --> 00:17:02,824 Hey, college mama. How'd it go? 281 00:17:02,893 --> 00:17:04,994 Tricia: Yeah, so do you and your buffer 282 00:17:05,063 --> 00:17:06,294 want to come over for dinner? 283 00:17:06,363 --> 00:17:07,830 I made this-- way too much food. 284 00:17:07,899 --> 00:17:09,430 Casseroles. I don't know. I'm just-- 285 00:17:09,499 --> 00:17:12,067 - I'm not used to cooking for one. - Yeah, I'll check with him. 286 00:17:12,136 --> 00:17:14,369 By the way, you owe me. I just saw Mom. 287 00:17:14,438 --> 00:17:16,538 Jesus Christ. 288 00:17:16,607 --> 00:17:18,874 We are leaving as soon as we finish eating. 289 00:17:18,943 --> 00:17:21,043 Copy that. What's our safe word? 290 00:17:21,112 --> 00:17:22,744 - Tricia! - Hello! 291 00:17:22,813 --> 00:17:25,214 - Hey. - Tricia: Come on in. 292 00:17:25,283 --> 00:17:27,515 - "Juicy." - Joel: "Juicy." 293 00:17:27,584 --> 00:17:31,086 This is fun. Thank you for having us. 294 00:17:31,155 --> 00:17:35,424 Oh no! I'm so glad you came. And Joel... 295 00:17:35,493 --> 00:17:38,559 I mean, have to give you a little compliment. 296 00:17:38,628 --> 00:17:41,964 You almost make Sam fun. Almost. - 297 00:17:42,033 --> 00:17:43,431 - Thanks. - Thanks... 298 00:17:43,500 --> 00:17:45,600 So, of course, I've been wondering and thinking 299 00:17:45,669 --> 00:17:47,169 about what this day was gonna be like, 300 00:17:47,238 --> 00:17:49,872 and it was nothing like I thought it would be. 301 00:17:49,941 --> 00:17:51,706 He wasn't even there. 302 00:17:51,775 --> 00:17:55,443 Well, I know there are mixed emotions, but, you know, 303 00:17:55,512 --> 00:17:57,178 you should feel proud of yourself. 304 00:17:57,247 --> 00:17:58,714 You raised a really wonderful young woman. 305 00:17:58,783 --> 00:18:00,548 Thank you. 306 00:18:00,617 --> 00:18:03,653 You know, I've never really been alone, like, not ever. 307 00:18:03,722 --> 00:18:05,220 I mean, this is it for me. 308 00:18:05,289 --> 00:18:07,155 I mean, you get divorced at my age, 309 00:18:07,224 --> 00:18:09,085 that is the end. Done. 310 00:18:09,154 --> 00:18:10,692 I'll be alone forever, and, you know, that's fine. 311 00:18:10,761 --> 00:18:13,362 It's not a big deal. But, Sam, you've always been alone. 312 00:18:13,431 --> 00:18:16,431 I mean, you're good at it or used to it or whatever. 313 00:18:16,500 --> 00:18:18,367 It's fine for you, and that's fine. 314 00:18:18,436 --> 00:18:20,902 I just never thought that I would end up like this. 315 00:18:20,971 --> 00:18:22,570 Just never saw it. 316 00:18:22,639 --> 00:18:26,007 Thought I'd be more like Mom and Dad, like married forever. 317 00:18:26,076 --> 00:18:27,875 - Really? - Tricia: Mm-hmm! 318 00:18:27,944 --> 00:18:30,345 - Heck yeah. - Get treated like shit and fuckin' 319 00:18:30,414 --> 00:18:32,651 taken for granted like Dad? 320 00:18:33,618 --> 00:18:35,254 Mm, just... 321 00:18:36,487 --> 00:18:38,657 I don't wanna be a divorced person. 322 00:18:39,456 --> 00:18:41,756 I don't... I'm not a div-- 323 00:18:41,825 --> 00:18:44,627 I'm not the kind of person who gets divorced. 324 00:18:44,696 --> 00:18:45,764 I don't... 325 00:18:46,792 --> 00:18:47,997 Well, you don't have to be. 326 00:18:48,066 --> 00:18:51,100 You could get back together with Rick. 327 00:18:51,169 --> 00:18:52,871 Joel, he cheated. 328 00:18:53,671 --> 00:18:55,307 Or not. Or not. 329 00:18:56,106 --> 00:18:57,773 Tricia: Well... 330 00:18:57,842 --> 00:18:59,474 Maybe I cheated, too. 331 00:18:59,543 --> 00:19:00,709 No, you didn't! 332 00:19:00,778 --> 00:19:02,177 You did? 333 00:19:02,246 --> 00:19:05,080 Well, I guess not technically, 334 00:19:05,149 --> 00:19:07,282 but, I mean, I did try. 335 00:19:07,351 --> 00:19:10,820 What are you talking about? 336 00:19:10,889 --> 00:19:13,021 Uh-hm. 337 00:19:13,090 --> 00:19:15,852 - I think I need more details. - I'd like a few more myself. 338 00:19:15,921 --> 00:19:17,727 - Joel: I wanna know. - With Coop. 339 00:19:17,796 --> 00:19:19,628 No! 340 00:19:19,697 --> 00:19:21,063 Yes! 341 00:19:21,132 --> 00:19:23,165 Well, she fucked my husband, 342 00:19:23,234 --> 00:19:26,001 - so I tried to fuck hers. - Sam: Tricia! 343 00:19:26,070 --> 00:19:28,403 - Tricia: Hm? - Now who's fun? 344 00:19:28,472 --> 00:19:30,539 I was so mad. He turned me down, so... - Sam: Wha... 345 00:19:30,608 --> 00:19:32,974 Okay, th-then it doesn't really count. - Tricia: Coop. 346 00:19:33,043 --> 00:19:34,442 Okay? Coop. 347 00:19:34,511 --> 00:19:37,746 Coop said no to this, this whole situation. 348 00:19:37,815 --> 00:19:40,415 He was like, "No thanks." I'm like, "What the fuck? 349 00:19:40,484 --> 00:19:42,985 Wh-who are you again?" 350 00:19:43,054 --> 00:19:45,653 Do you know what a pencil test is, Joel? 351 00:19:45,722 --> 00:19:47,890 - Oh, here we go. - Tricia: Okay. Pencil test. 352 00:19:47,959 --> 00:19:49,558 Do you wanna say it or you want me to say it? 353 00:19:49,627 --> 00:19:51,460 - I guess you? - Okay, I'll say it. 354 00:19:51,529 --> 00:19:53,462 - Joel: You can say it. - Pencil test is if it stays-- 355 00:19:53,531 --> 00:19:55,530 You put it under here, and if it stays... 356 00:19:55,599 --> 00:19:57,032 Anyway, it's good if it falls. 357 00:19:57,101 --> 00:20:00,702 - Oh! Well, it did! - Tricia: That was loud. Sorry! 358 00:20:00,771 --> 00:20:03,905 So, I pass the pencil test even still. 359 00:20:03,974 --> 00:20:05,841 Even at my age. Do you see it? 360 00:20:05,910 --> 00:20:07,509 What do you think? 361 00:20:07,578 --> 00:20:09,210 Joel, just tell her she has great tits. 362 00:20:09,279 --> 00:20:10,715 Say it. You're not even looking at 'em. 363 00:20:12,416 --> 00:20:14,615 You have great tits. 364 00:20:14,684 --> 00:20:17,252 - Why would you make me say that? - 'Cause I wanted to hear it. 365 00:20:17,321 --> 00:20:18,854 Joel: Oh, my God. 366 00:20:18,923 --> 00:20:20,521 That did not sound good coming outta my mouth. 367 00:20:20,590 --> 00:20:22,224 It was a little bit weird, but I feel much better. 368 00:20:22,293 --> 00:20:23,591 Who wants more wine? 369 00:20:23,660 --> 00:20:25,827 I would like to know how you feel about my tits, Joel. 370 00:20:27,165 --> 00:20:28,463 - You know how-- - Just look at 'em. 371 00:20:28,532 --> 00:20:30,799 You know how a mother can't love... 372 00:20:30,868 --> 00:20:33,801 more-- her children more than the other? - Whose do you like better? 373 00:20:33,870 --> 00:20:35,703 - If you had to pick? - You know, it's equal love. 374 00:20:35,772 --> 00:20:37,505 - It's equal love. - Do you like the pencil test pass, 375 00:20:37,574 --> 00:20:40,710 - or would you rather-- - Or what about the salad-- 376 00:20:42,780 --> 00:20:46,181 If I don't win now, you fucker. 377 00:20:48,419 --> 00:20:49,955 Is that what I think it is? 378 00:20:51,955 --> 00:20:54,089 ♪ I love a teenie-tini, would you like a teenie-tini? ♪ 379 00:20:54,158 --> 00:20:55,590 ♪ I'd like a teenie-tini, too ♪ 380 00:20:55,659 --> 00:20:57,854 ♪ That's one teenie-tini, and another teenie-tini ♪ 381 00:20:57,923 --> 00:21:00,966 Joel: Ooh! 382 00:21:03,701 --> 00:21:06,368 I guess it'll be a teenier-tini. 383 00:21:06,437 --> 00:21:08,871 That's okay. I'll take whatever you got. - 384 00:21:08,940 --> 00:21:12,073 Oh, we've earned it after that dinner. Oh, my God. 385 00:21:14,512 --> 00:21:16,511 Okay. Okay. Oh. 386 00:21:16,580 --> 00:21:19,180 I guess one shouldn't mix drinks 387 00:21:19,249 --> 00:21:21,549 when under the influence. 388 00:21:21,618 --> 00:21:24,756 Cheers. Thank you for this. Cheers. - Cheers! 389 00:21:25,523 --> 00:21:26,521 Mm! 390 00:21:26,590 --> 00:21:29,658 Oh God. Tricia's a lot. 391 00:21:31,229 --> 00:21:33,762 Mm! Oh, my God, how is your mom? 392 00:21:33,831 --> 00:21:37,198 Oh, she was wonderful. Thank you so much for asking. - Aww. 393 00:21:37,267 --> 00:21:39,601 Was it just a real shit show? 394 00:21:39,670 --> 00:21:41,969 It was a shit show. Do you know what she's doing now? 395 00:21:42,038 --> 00:21:44,907 - Hm? - She is bumming cigarettes off of her fellow residents. 396 00:21:44,976 --> 00:21:46,475 Well, sure. 397 00:21:46,544 --> 00:21:48,509 She's a stroke victim. Why wouldn't she? - Yes! 398 00:21:48,578 --> 00:21:50,378 I think she would like another stroke. 399 00:21:50,447 --> 00:21:52,547 Oh no. Sorry. 400 00:21:52,616 --> 00:21:53,715 But you can't tell her what to do! 401 00:21:53,784 --> 00:21:55,450 She just does whatever the fuck she wants. 402 00:21:55,519 --> 00:21:57,286 I wouldn't even go visit her if it weren't for my dad, 403 00:21:57,355 --> 00:21:58,988 but, you know, fuck. 404 00:21:59,057 --> 00:22:01,190 Ugh. You know what? 405 00:22:01,259 --> 00:22:03,559 - Hm? - I think what you need is 30 CCs 406 00:22:03,628 --> 00:22:05,460 of Joel on your next visit. 407 00:22:05,529 --> 00:22:08,530 I am a very charming companion! 408 00:22:08,599 --> 00:22:11,233 Joel, I will not stand by while my mother's a cunt to you. 409 00:22:13,637 --> 00:22:15,937 I'm sorry, but she cunt help herself. 410 00:22:19,043 --> 00:22:20,175 I like gettin' lit. 411 00:22:23,380 --> 00:22:26,148 Cheers! Oh, my God. 412 00:22:26,217 --> 00:22:27,583 - Fred: Here he is! - Oh, my God! 413 00:22:27,652 --> 00:22:29,284 - Sam: Jesus Christ! - Hi, kids! 414 00:22:29,353 --> 00:22:31,420 I've missed you. How are you? 415 00:22:31,489 --> 00:22:33,689 - What are you doing here? - Her pops called me. 416 00:22:33,758 --> 00:22:35,557 - What, he did? - Fred: Yeah, he did. 417 00:22:35,626 --> 00:22:37,225 But you know what? He just wanted to make sure 418 00:22:37,294 --> 00:22:39,161 that you're doing okay and everything's okay at the farm. 419 00:22:39,230 --> 00:22:41,063 - Okay. - Fred: And you know what? I gotta tell you, kids. 420 00:22:41,132 --> 00:22:43,431 I was getting a little cold and bored up there in-- 421 00:22:43,500 --> 00:22:45,934 thank you-- in Wisconsin, you know? 422 00:22:46,003 --> 00:22:47,803 - So, it was time to come home. - Well, welcome back. 423 00:22:47,872 --> 00:22:49,572 - Thank you. - Sam: Welcome back. 424 00:22:49,641 --> 00:22:52,168 Jesus, Sammy! Oh my God, 425 00:22:52,237 --> 00:22:54,576 is this what it's come down to? 426 00:22:54,645 --> 00:22:55,911 It's a little fluffy under there. 427 00:22:55,980 --> 00:22:57,812 It's like an Ewok's on your lap. You see that? 428 00:22:57,881 --> 00:23:00,348 - You see that? - Yeah, well, I'm a child of the '70s, 429 00:23:00,417 --> 00:23:02,617 and my bush should be a reflection of that. 430 00:23:02,686 --> 00:23:04,086 Oh, how I missed you two. 431 00:23:04,155 --> 00:23:06,188 - Is it that bad? - It's kinda bad. 432 00:23:06,257 --> 00:23:09,190 I'm so glad I finally get to see the honeymoon suite. 433 00:23:09,259 --> 00:23:11,125 It's solely a financial arrangement. 434 00:23:11,194 --> 00:23:14,257 A little marriage of convenience. I get a cut. - 435 00:23:14,326 --> 00:23:17,032 So, I don't understand. My dad will call you, 436 00:23:17,101 --> 00:23:18,167 but not his own daughters? 437 00:23:18,236 --> 00:23:19,401 Well, he doesn't want you to think 438 00:23:19,470 --> 00:23:21,336 he's being overbearing or micromanaging. 439 00:23:21,405 --> 00:23:22,966 Okay, so he sent you? 440 00:23:23,035 --> 00:23:25,073 Yeah. I'm the full package. 441 00:23:26,577 --> 00:23:28,910 Can you do that? Can you just leave a sabbatical? 442 00:23:28,979 --> 00:23:31,680 It's, like, a really big deal for you and your career, right? 443 00:23:31,749 --> 00:23:33,916 Look, kids, nine months was enough, 444 00:23:33,985 --> 00:23:35,984 and I can finish my research here. 445 00:23:36,053 --> 00:23:39,322 Well... Thank you, Fred. 446 00:23:39,391 --> 00:23:40,984 Hey, come on. 447 00:23:41,053 --> 00:23:42,891 - Anything for Ed. - Yeah. 448 00:23:42,960 --> 00:23:45,094 But I guess we're fucked for choir practice now. 449 00:23:45,163 --> 00:23:46,895 - No! No. - Fred: I know. 450 00:23:46,964 --> 00:23:48,767 - We'll figure it out. - We'll figure it out. 451 00:23:49,434 --> 00:23:51,366 And, um... 452 00:23:51,435 --> 00:23:54,135 uh, your dad did tell me that MJ had a stroke. 453 00:23:54,204 --> 00:23:56,271 - Yeah. - Fred: Sorry. 454 00:23:56,340 --> 00:23:58,873 Yeah, well, it's harder on my dad. 455 00:23:58,942 --> 00:24:00,776 Then he was just pushing himself to do all this stuff 456 00:24:00,845 --> 00:24:02,945 that he can't really do anymore. 457 00:24:03,014 --> 00:24:05,614 Well, you know, he is a farmer. - Yeah. 458 00:24:05,683 --> 00:24:07,449 Plus renting out the land and then the barn, 459 00:24:07,518 --> 00:24:08,850 it was just all too much. 460 00:24:08,919 --> 00:24:11,186 So, I was like, "Dad, now's the time. Y-you have to go. 461 00:24:11,255 --> 00:24:13,155 You've never done anything for yourself." - Joel: Mm. 462 00:24:13,224 --> 00:24:16,624 So, now he's on a boat with his brother in Corpus Christi, 463 00:24:16,693 --> 00:24:18,226 probably drinking a beer right now. - 464 00:24:18,295 --> 00:24:20,628 He is gonna have the best time. We all know it. - The best time. 465 00:24:20,697 --> 00:24:22,630 You know he's raging out there right now. - 466 00:24:22,699 --> 00:24:26,536 Oh, kids. I-I know this is a lot, but we got this. 467 00:24:26,605 --> 00:24:28,070 - We got this. - We got this. 468 00:24:28,139 --> 00:24:29,174 Fred: And... 469 00:24:30,407 --> 00:24:32,975 I also brought back... 470 00:24:33,044 --> 00:24:35,145 cheese curds! Look at this. 471 00:24:36,675 --> 00:24:38,981 Put one in the freezer for Ed. I know how he loves his cheese. 472 00:24:39,050 --> 00:24:40,382 He loves cheese. 473 00:24:40,451 --> 00:24:42,551 - One for you, buddy. - Oh goodness! Thank you. 474 00:24:42,620 --> 00:24:44,347 Sam: Well, I guess if we're partying, 475 00:24:44,416 --> 00:24:46,287 then maybe you're probably wondering, like, 476 00:24:46,356 --> 00:24:48,490 what we've been up to this whole time. - Alright. What do you got? 477 00:24:48,559 --> 00:24:49,759 Well, we like to drink our teenie-tinis, 478 00:24:49,828 --> 00:24:51,493 and then we like to open up the dance floor. 479 00:24:51,562 --> 00:24:53,994 Joel: Oh, my God, this is the song! This is the song! - 480 00:24:54,063 --> 00:24:56,764 Turning it up! Okay, Sammy and Joel! - What are you doing? 481 00:24:56,833 --> 00:24:58,967 - You gotta get up on your feet. - You want me to join? 482 00:24:59,036 --> 00:25:01,102 - Yeah, get the fuck up! - Alright, shit! 483 00:25:01,171 --> 00:25:03,271 - ♪ When you decide you like yourself ♪ - Holler at me! 484 00:25:03,340 --> 00:25:04,940 - Oh, okay! - ♪ When you decide you need someone ♪ 485 00:25:05,009 --> 00:25:06,674 - Holler at me! - Holler at me! Feel the spirit! 486 00:25:06,743 --> 00:25:09,912 - Holler at me! - Holler at me! Oh, my God, my pelvic floor just dropped! 487 00:25:11,743 --> 00:25:13,882 - All: Holler at me! - Fred: Do I have to do it like this? 488 00:25:13,951 --> 00:25:16,051 All: Holler at me! 489 00:25:16,120 --> 00:25:18,853 - All: Holler at me! - Sam: Oh! Shit, I can't breathe! 490 00:25:18,922 --> 00:25:21,757 - We did it! Okay. - Joel: I need to stop. I need to stop! 491 00:25:47,451 --> 00:25:49,451 - Joel! - Joel: Yeah? 492 00:25:49,520 --> 00:25:51,723 How many active hours do you have? 493 00:25:53,524 --> 00:25:55,224 Ten. 494 00:25:55,293 --> 00:25:57,026 Sam: Oh, that's good. 495 00:25:57,095 --> 00:25:59,328 Is... is 13 better? 496 00:26:02,500 --> 00:26:04,136 I guess it's technic-- 497 00:26:04,969 --> 00:26:08,270 Oh, are you fucking kidding me? 498 00:26:08,339 --> 00:26:09,975 - What? - Joel: No. 499 00:26:10,775 --> 00:26:12,673 They gave me two stars! 500 00:26:12,742 --> 00:26:15,877 They say I have non-absorptive bath towels! 501 00:26:15,946 --> 00:26:17,679 Fuck them! I picked out those towels! 502 00:26:17,748 --> 00:26:20,182 Your dog shit all over my house! 503 00:26:20,251 --> 00:26:22,084 Oh, these motherfuckers! 504 00:26:22,153 --> 00:26:24,453 Joel, we're gonna find 'em and burn 'em alive. 505 00:26:24,522 --> 00:26:28,051 - I'm gonna write a letter! - To who? 506 00:26:28,120 --> 00:26:30,259 I don't know. 507 00:26:31,896 --> 00:26:34,699 - Okay, you ready? - Yeah. 508 00:26:35,466 --> 00:26:38,100 - Lights out. - Alright. 509 00:26:39,671 --> 00:26:41,437 - Nighty-night. - Nighty-night. 510 00:26:46,144 --> 00:26:48,380 My beautiful, perfect rating... 511 00:26:51,849 --> 00:26:54,049 - Night, Joel. - Good night. 512 00:26:57,087 --> 00:26:58,388 Sweet dweams! 513 00:27:03,694 --> 00:27:05,293 ♪ Hit me with your eyes ♪ 514 00:27:05,362 --> 00:27:07,996 ♪ I never seen that kind of view ♪ 515 00:27:08,065 --> 00:27:09,792 ♪ You walkin' over here ♪ 516 00:27:09,861 --> 00:27:12,567 ♪ The way that it went down, that's when I knew ♪ 517 00:27:12,636 --> 00:27:14,202 ♪ We be talkin' all night ♪ 518 00:27:14,271 --> 00:27:17,973 ♪ But I can tell you need to work on you, you, you ♪ 519 00:27:18,042 --> 00:27:20,309 ♪ Like you, you, you ♪ 520 00:27:20,378 --> 00:27:22,445 ♪ Like you ♪ 521 00:27:22,514 --> 00:27:24,183 ♪ Like you ♪ 522 00:27:24,782 --> 00:27:26,548 ♪ Mm ♪ 523 00:27:26,617 --> 00:27:28,016 ♪ You be playin' sweet ♪ 524 00:27:28,085 --> 00:27:31,181 ♪ But, baby, don't you know that talk is cheap ♪ 525 00:27:31,250 --> 00:27:32,487 ♪ Can't fool me ♪ 526 00:27:32,556 --> 00:27:36,057 ♪ I wish that you could back it up for me, me, me ♪ 527 00:27:36,126 --> 00:27:39,928 ♪ Like me, me, me, like me ♪ 528 00:27:39,997 --> 00:27:42,325 ♪ You know that I ♪ 529 00:27:42,394 --> 00:27:44,533 ♪ I heard it all before ♪ 530 00:27:44,602 --> 00:27:46,769 ♪ You're hesitant ♪ 531 00:27:46,838 --> 00:27:49,004 ♪ But you could give me more ♪ 532 00:27:49,073 --> 00:27:51,440 ♪ I know you like ♪ 533 00:27:51,509 --> 00:27:53,875 ♪ To play those silly games ♪ 534 00:27:53,944 --> 00:27:57,312 ♪ When you're done, call my name ♪ 535 00:27:57,381 --> 00:27:59,875 ♪ When you decide you like yourself, holler at me ♪ 536 00:27:59,944 --> 00:28:02,050 ♪ When you decide you need someone, call up on me ♪ 537 00:28:02,119 --> 00:28:04,019 ♪ When you don't have to think about it ♪ 538 00:28:04,088 --> 00:28:07,326 ♪ Love me at the ungodly hour ♪ 40527

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