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♪ I was born in Kansas ♪
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♪ I was bred in Kansas ♪
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♪ And when I get married ♪
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♪ I'll be wed in Kansas ♪
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00:00:16,086 --> 00:00:18,486
♪ There's a true blue gal ♪
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♪ Who promised she would wait ♪
7
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♪ She's a sun, sunflower ♪
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♪ From the sunflower state ♪
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♪ She's a sunflower ♪
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♪ She's my sunflower ♪
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♪ And I know we'll never part ♪
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♪ Ooh, ooh... ♪
13
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- So many hotties out today.
- Joel: Yeah.
14
00:00:37,942 --> 00:00:40,508
- You see that guy?
- Yeah, I see him.
15
00:00:40,577 --> 00:00:43,912
- Slim-fit, high-waisted jean?
- Uh-huh, it certainly is.
16
00:00:43,981 --> 00:00:46,982
- And a sensible sneaker.
- Oh, yes, ma'am.
17
00:00:47,051 --> 00:00:49,251
Usually not my thing,
but I'll pound it.
18
00:00:49,320 --> 00:00:50,886
Oh, I'm gonna pound it, too.
19
00:00:50,955 --> 00:00:53,288
What about this?
20
00:00:53,357 --> 00:00:56,391
Leather jacket on
an unseasonably warm day?
21
00:00:56,460 --> 00:00:58,393
Oh, he was big in the '80s.
22
00:00:58,462 --> 00:01:00,395
But at least we know he doesn't
mind getting sweaty, right?
23
00:01:00,464 --> 00:01:02,130
- Exactly!
- I kinda like that.
24
00:01:02,199 --> 00:01:04,199
- Yeah, pound it!
- Pound it!
25
00:01:04,268 --> 00:01:06,001
I want somebody to be
just as sweaty as I am.
26
00:01:06,070 --> 00:01:07,669
I wanna know they're
putting in the fuckin' work.
27
00:01:09,707 --> 00:01:12,207
Oh, 10,000. Done!
28
00:01:12,276 --> 00:01:14,309
Oh God,
29
00:01:14,378 --> 00:01:16,311
how can we get our steps
every single day,
30
00:01:16,380 --> 00:01:18,646
and yet my pants
are still tight?
31
00:01:18,715 --> 00:01:21,616
I don't know.
Maybe you oughta get on that elastic band life.
32
00:01:21,685 --> 00:01:24,356
Then you never really
know what's goin' on. -
33
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- Seriously?
- You seeing this?
34
00:01:27,525 --> 00:01:29,992
I mean, that,
that's disgusting.
35
00:01:30,061 --> 00:01:31,193
I bet he wakes up
every morning
36
00:01:31,262 --> 00:01:32,560
and gives her
a sweet little kiss
37
00:01:32,629 --> 00:01:34,296
right on the tip
of her clitoris. -
38
00:01:34,364 --> 00:01:36,866
- Gross. Sam!
- What?
39
00:01:36,935 --> 00:01:38,966
Ah...
40
00:01:39,035 --> 00:01:40,931
- Hey, Trish.
- Tricia: Hey, you gotta meet me.
41
00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:42,270
- I have Dad's list.
- Like, right now?
42
00:01:42,339 --> 00:01:43,472
I'm kinda
in the middle of someth--
43
00:01:43,541 --> 00:01:44,672
Tricia:
Meet me in an hour
44
00:01:44,741 --> 00:01:46,008
and please do not
keep me waiting 'cause
45
00:01:46,077 --> 00:01:48,177
- I have like 600,000--
- I'll be there!
46
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- Fuckin' Tricia.
- Mm.
47
00:01:50,414 --> 00:01:52,647
You know what
she would never do? - What?
48
00:01:52,716 --> 00:01:55,818
She'd never play
"pound it or pass." - Her loss.
49
00:01:55,887 --> 00:01:58,819
Seriously.
Like, look at that guy.
50
00:01:58,888 --> 00:02:01,323
Well you know
he loves poetry. - Joel: Yeah.
51
00:02:01,392 --> 00:02:04,626
Really, really, really
enjoys infomercials.
52
00:02:04,695 --> 00:02:07,696
Oh, can't wait to
tell you about his day. - Yeah.
53
00:02:07,765 --> 00:02:09,164
Hates Cher.
54
00:02:09,233 --> 00:02:11,967
- No, he doe-- Who hates Cher?
- I mean, this guy.
55
00:02:12,036 --> 00:02:14,236
- Oh, well, then pass.
- Pass?!
56
00:02:14,305 --> 00:02:15,370
Sam:
I'm not pounding that.
57
00:02:15,439 --> 00:02:17,873
Oh, you coulda
had it so good.
58
00:02:17,942 --> 00:02:20,412
Where is Roger?
He's late today.
59
00:02:21,780 --> 00:02:23,215
There he is.
60
00:02:24,410 --> 00:02:25,484
Oh.
61
00:02:26,851 --> 00:02:28,150
Okay.
62
00:02:28,219 --> 00:02:29,854
I'm glad he's okay.
63
00:02:32,222 --> 00:02:34,326
You did the right thing.
64
00:02:38,362 --> 00:02:41,263
- Wanna do another lap?
- Why would we do that?
65
00:02:41,332 --> 00:02:44,366
- It'll be fun.
- No, it won't.
66
00:02:44,435 --> 00:02:48,369
Okay, we can just
go back to the car. - Okay, you ready?
67
00:02:48,438 --> 00:02:51,573
Well, first, can I just
tell you something?
68
00:02:51,642 --> 00:02:54,642
- No. Joel...
- Well, since we don't have time to do another lap,
69
00:02:54,711 --> 00:02:57,679
- I have time to say this.
- No, no, please. Joel.
70
00:02:57,748 --> 00:03:00,115
Don't do it. Don't ruin
this moment, please.
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00:03:00,184 --> 00:03:01,784
I really love you.
72
00:03:01,853 --> 00:03:03,552
Joel. Joel!
73
00:03:03,621 --> 00:03:05,253
Sam: Come on.
74
00:03:05,322 --> 00:03:07,054
I'm doing another lap!
You got me!
75
00:03:07,123 --> 00:03:09,357
- Joel: I love you.
- Sam: You know I don't have the infrastructure
76
00:03:09,426 --> 00:03:11,794
to go this fast!
Stop talking! - I love you!
77
00:03:21,472 --> 00:03:23,171
Tricia:
I mean, I don't know why he sent this to me.
78
00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:24,406
You're the one
who told him to go.
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00:03:24,475 --> 00:03:26,040
Sam:
Well, you're the responsible one.
80
00:03:26,109 --> 00:03:28,404
Tricia: Didn't you teach him
how to use a cell phone? - Sam: I did,
81
00:03:28,473 --> 00:03:31,313
but I-I don't know.
I guess it didn't work. - Tricia: Guess not.
82
00:03:31,382 --> 00:03:33,748
Alright, well,
this is all good.
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Uh, "Made it to the airport
in plenty of time.
84
00:03:35,787 --> 00:03:38,320
Had an aisle seat."
That's fascinating.
85
00:03:38,389 --> 00:03:40,222
"Made friends with
the stewardess." - Of course.
86
00:03:40,291 --> 00:03:42,357
Um...
87
00:03:42,426 --> 00:03:44,293
"Wish you girls
could see the boat.
88
00:03:44,362 --> 00:03:46,195
"Uncle Frank really
restored it good.
89
00:03:46,264 --> 00:03:48,363
"Grilling up steaks tonight.
90
00:03:48,432 --> 00:03:50,769
Setting sail
tomorrow morning."
91
00:03:53,270 --> 00:03:54,870
Okay, here's our to-do list.
92
00:03:54,939 --> 00:03:56,738
- It's extensive.
- Fuck.
93
00:03:56,807 --> 00:03:59,074
"Number one, visit
your mother every day."
94
00:03:59,143 --> 00:04:01,542
Let's start
that one tomorrow.
95
00:04:01,611 --> 00:04:05,514
"Put in storm windows, vacuum,
feed chickens, mow lawn,
96
00:04:05,583 --> 00:04:08,550
check sump pump,
clean out barn."
97
00:04:08,619 --> 00:04:11,654
I-I can't-- I cannot deal
with this right now!
98
00:04:11,723 --> 00:04:13,688
I just can't!
I mean, I gotta go.
99
00:04:13,757 --> 00:04:15,657
I gotta go to work,
gotta pack Shannon up. I mean--
100
00:04:15,726 --> 00:04:17,959
- Okay, alright.
- This was your idea anyway! I hate farming.
101
00:04:18,028 --> 00:04:21,261
We're not farming, Tricia!
We're unfarming! -
102
00:04:21,700 --> 00:04:23,231
And...
103
00:04:23,300 --> 00:04:24,366
Come on. Aren't you glad
104
00:04:24,435 --> 00:04:26,038
he's finally doing
something for himself?
105
00:04:27,972 --> 00:04:31,406
Well... the timing sucks.
106
00:04:31,475 --> 00:04:33,841
Alright. I'm gonna
come by later to say goodbye to Shannon.
107
00:04:33,910 --> 00:04:35,843
- Tricia: Okay.
- I wanna give her some of my old KU shirts.
108
00:04:35,912 --> 00:04:38,517
- Okay.
- She didn't tell you I got her a fake ID, did she?
109
00:04:40,417 --> 00:04:42,184
I mean, I'm pretty sure
you're kidding, but...
110
00:04:42,253 --> 00:04:44,152
I'm kidding.
111
00:04:44,221 --> 00:04:45,657
But I did tell her
where to get one.
112
00:04:48,159 --> 00:04:49,459
You're not funny.
113
00:04:49,528 --> 00:04:50,963
I think it's funny.
114
00:04:57,734 --> 00:05:01,137
Of course, you were
talking to your neighbor.
115
00:05:02,974 --> 00:05:04,505
I gotta clear out the barn.
116
00:05:04,574 --> 00:05:06,842
Remind me, I need
to get trash bags. - Joel: Mm.
117
00:05:06,911 --> 00:05:09,277
Oh, fuck, you know what?
I already made a list.
118
00:05:09,346 --> 00:05:12,047
Why can't I remember
anything anymore?
119
00:05:12,116 --> 00:05:14,049
- Menopause?
- Perimenopause.
120
00:05:14,118 --> 00:05:16,385
- What's the difference?
- Fuck, nobody knows.
121
00:05:17,954 --> 00:05:20,688
It should be an easy flip.
It's just like an older couple.
122
00:05:20,757 --> 00:05:23,758
They're real sweet,
in town for the game.
123
00:05:23,827 --> 00:05:26,362
And I locked
up all of my crystal in the owner's closet.
124
00:05:26,431 --> 00:05:29,198
- Lesson learned.
- Good.
125
00:05:29,267 --> 00:05:30,800
I can't believe
I let you cut my hair.
126
00:05:30,869 --> 00:05:34,536
Oh, but it's so...
kitty.
127
00:05:34,605 --> 00:05:37,272
- It is kitty, right? Kitty.
- So kitty. I'd pound that.
128
00:05:37,341 --> 00:05:40,475
- Hey.
- Here's your hazelnut and soy milk latte for your husband.
129
00:05:40,544 --> 00:05:41,944
Oh, here you go, honey.
130
00:05:42,013 --> 00:05:44,546
Kisses.
131
00:05:44,615 --> 00:05:47,048
We better get you home.
I know the caffeine gets you horny.
132
00:05:47,117 --> 00:05:48,016
Oh yeah.
133
00:05:48,085 --> 00:05:50,085
♪ I'm just soaking wet ♪
134
00:05:50,154 --> 00:05:52,254
♪ Oh, I'm so wet, oh ♪
135
00:05:52,323 --> 00:05:55,558
♪ So fucking wet, ow-ow,
watch out! ♪
136
00:06:05,903 --> 00:06:08,140
- Should we do our stretches?
- Yeah.
137
00:06:11,776 --> 00:06:13,342
One, two, three.
138
00:06:16,213 --> 00:06:17,445
Ugh, I really wish tonight
139
00:06:17,514 --> 00:06:19,680
wasn't a designated
non-drinking night.
140
00:06:19,749 --> 00:06:22,684
What are you talking about?
We just had two DNDNs in a row.
141
00:06:22,753 --> 00:06:24,319
- We did?
- Yeah! It's definitely time for a DN,
142
00:06:24,388 --> 00:06:25,353
unless you cheated.
143
00:06:25,422 --> 00:06:27,588
Joel, I would never!
144
00:06:27,657 --> 00:06:30,359
Okay, then.
Let's go out, you know?
145
00:06:30,428 --> 00:06:32,960
Go downtown, take
your mind off things.
146
00:06:33,029 --> 00:06:36,098
My friend Carla, from yoga,
she said that-- - Oh, my God, Joel!
147
00:06:36,167 --> 00:06:38,999
You know I hate when you
talk about your yoga friends.
148
00:06:39,068 --> 00:06:42,370
I know, but she's
different. She's-- - Oh, stop! NNP, Joel.
149
00:06:42,439 --> 00:06:43,904
- What's NNP?
- No new people!
150
00:06:43,973 --> 00:06:46,341
Especially somebody that can
touch their nose to their twat.
151
00:06:46,410 --> 00:06:48,810
It's not natural.
152
00:06:48,879 --> 00:06:51,146
But she's different.
She's pregnant. - Oh, strike two.
153
00:06:53,283 --> 00:06:55,584
I will never give her a chance.
154
00:06:55,653 --> 00:06:57,852
- Joel: They left it unlocked.
- Sam: Oh, that's good.
155
00:06:57,921 --> 00:07:01,356
- Yo! Oh! Sam! Oh, my God!
- Ah! What the fuck is this?
156
00:07:01,425 --> 00:07:03,992
Joel:
There is a clear no-pet policy.
157
00:07:04,061 --> 00:07:06,562
Sam: Oof. Can't believe
you stepped in it. - Joel: I know.
158
00:07:06,631 --> 00:07:08,396
The smell is
living in my nose.
159
00:07:08,465 --> 00:07:10,599
I don't know if I can
come back from this.
160
00:07:10,668 --> 00:07:12,567
Oh, Joel, we're burning
those shoes tonight.
161
00:07:12,636 --> 00:07:14,537
These are
my good step shoes!
162
00:07:14,606 --> 00:07:16,841
Not anymore.
163
00:07:18,843 --> 00:07:20,341
What about this?
164
00:07:20,410 --> 00:07:23,011
You think pa-pah counts
as organic matter?
165
00:07:23,080 --> 00:07:24,679
Oh yeah.
166
00:07:24,748 --> 00:07:27,683
Hey, Steve!
Does this stuff work on dog shit?
167
00:07:27,752 --> 00:07:29,352
- You got a mess?
- Joel: Steve,
168
00:07:29,421 --> 00:07:31,219
it's really bad.
169
00:07:31,288 --> 00:07:33,456
It's really bad.
170
00:07:33,525 --> 00:07:36,458
Yeah, that should do it.
171
00:07:36,527 --> 00:07:38,527
- Let's load it up.
- Alright.
172
00:07:38,596 --> 00:07:40,262
I'm getting at least two.
173
00:07:40,331 --> 00:07:42,364
- One more.
- Okay.
174
00:07:42,433 --> 00:07:44,033
Do you think they
have snacks here?
175
00:07:44,102 --> 00:07:47,203
Oh, they do, actually.
I do know that for a fact. - Oh.
176
00:08:10,962 --> 00:08:12,197
Fuck.
177
00:08:14,966 --> 00:08:16,969
Oh, my God...
178
00:08:18,168 --> 00:08:19,604
Holy shit.
179
00:08:27,845 --> 00:08:30,115
I ain't got
nowhere to put it.
180
00:08:33,451 --> 00:08:35,887
Ah, fuck.
181
00:09:21,533 --> 00:09:23,969
Oh.
182
00:09:46,290 --> 00:09:49,094
Alright. Well...
183
00:09:50,194 --> 00:09:51,796
think this is it.
184
00:09:54,065 --> 00:09:57,365
- Oh boy. Yeah?
- Okay, one thing.
185
00:09:57,434 --> 00:10:00,034
I hate the sign.
I don't really want that shit in my dorm room.
186
00:10:00,103 --> 00:10:02,899
Oh, excuse me.
That is the shit that paid for your dorm room,
187
00:10:02,968 --> 00:10:04,440
so it stays.
188
00:10:04,509 --> 00:10:06,045
Okay, fine.
189
00:10:07,611 --> 00:10:09,372
You know, it just
seems like yesterday
190
00:10:09,441 --> 00:10:11,980
we were dropping
you off at kindergarten.
191
00:10:12,049 --> 00:10:13,549
Mom...
192
00:10:13,618 --> 00:10:15,317
Shan, I'm just
so proud of you.
193
00:10:15,386 --> 00:10:16,985
You're just the best kid.
194
00:10:17,054 --> 00:10:19,054
Oh, you look gorgeous
for your first day!
195
00:10:19,123 --> 00:10:20,588
I can't stand it.
196
00:10:20,657 --> 00:10:23,325
Okay, let me just get
one more picture, okay?
197
00:10:23,394 --> 00:10:24,829
You pose right here.
198
00:10:27,031 --> 00:10:30,269
One second.
Let me get this thing open.
199
00:10:31,636 --> 00:10:34,403
- Alright, ready?
- Okay.
200
00:10:34,472 --> 00:10:35,771
Smile!
201
00:10:35,840 --> 00:10:38,310
- So cute.
- Hey, send it to Dad.
202
00:10:39,243 --> 00:10:41,443
Okay, yeah.
203
00:10:41,512 --> 00:10:43,644
- Actually, no, you could just--
- Oh, no, no, it's fine.
204
00:10:43,713 --> 00:10:45,948
- I'll send it to him.
- No, send it to me. I can send it to him.
205
00:10:46,017 --> 00:10:48,584
Nope. Already sent.
206
00:10:48,653 --> 00:10:50,385
Easy.
207
00:10:50,454 --> 00:10:52,788
- Not a big deal.
- Okay.
208
00:10:52,857 --> 00:10:54,623
Alright.
Let me get it together.
209
00:10:54,692 --> 00:10:56,692
Should we go?
You ready?
210
00:10:56,761 --> 00:10:58,560
Yeah, I guess.
211
00:10:58,629 --> 00:11:00,395
- I'm not ready, but.
- Yeah.
212
00:11:00,464 --> 00:11:02,298
- Should we get a coffee first?
- We'll get coffee.
213
00:11:02,367 --> 00:11:05,070
Okay.
214
00:11:31,423 --> 00:11:33,028
- Joel: Hey!
- Hey.
215
00:11:33,097 --> 00:11:35,430
Joel:
Well, I think I finally got the shit smell out.
216
00:11:35,499 --> 00:11:38,366
You can maybe smell it,
but you have to really, really try.
217
00:11:38,435 --> 00:11:41,397
How's it going up there?
You ready for the renters?
218
00:11:41,466 --> 00:11:43,703
Yeah, I'm getting there.
219
00:11:46,611 --> 00:11:48,247
Joel:
You okay?
220
00:11:49,314 --> 00:11:50,950
No.
221
00:11:53,685 --> 00:11:55,921
Just, um...
222
00:11:57,021 --> 00:11:59,120
feels really weird
to be here
223
00:11:59,189 --> 00:12:01,426
with all of his stuff,
you know?
224
00:12:03,728 --> 00:12:06,027
I...
225
00:12:06,096 --> 00:12:09,459
I mean, I wanted him to go,
and I pushed him to go, and I'm...
226
00:12:09,528 --> 00:12:11,032
and I'm glad he went
because I know
227
00:12:11,101 --> 00:12:12,634
that he couldn't have
cleaned out this barn.
228
00:12:12,703 --> 00:12:14,339
It would've broken his heart.
229
00:12:17,475 --> 00:12:19,444
But, I didn't...
230
00:12:21,345 --> 00:12:24,416
I didn't know it'd
break mine, and, um...
231
00:12:28,319 --> 00:12:30,750
Just sitting here,
Joel, and he...
232
00:12:33,491 --> 00:12:35,260
he's everywhere.
233
00:12:39,263 --> 00:12:41,664
Every inch
of this place is...
234
00:12:41,733 --> 00:12:43,802
him, you know?
235
00:12:47,271 --> 00:12:49,909
He loved this place.
236
00:12:51,008 --> 00:12:52,844
And now, I'm just...
237
00:12:54,145 --> 00:12:57,413
I just feel like
I'm packing up his whole life,
238
00:12:57,482 --> 00:12:59,051
and, um...
239
00:13:02,887 --> 00:13:04,823
God...
240
00:13:05,623 --> 00:13:08,891
Yeah, it just-- just sucks.
241
00:13:08,960 --> 00:13:11,030
Joel:
Do you want me to come out there?
242
00:13:14,666 --> 00:13:16,535
No, just, um...
243
00:13:18,703 --> 00:13:20,940
just sit with me for a minute.
244
00:13:23,675 --> 00:13:25,310
Joel:
Okay.
245
00:13:44,963 --> 00:13:47,430
Maybe I'm just
a little tired.
246
00:13:49,434 --> 00:13:51,333
I don't know.
247
00:13:51,402 --> 00:13:55,103
You know, facing
all this family shit without a cocktail.
248
00:13:55,172 --> 00:13:58,408
Joel:
I can be out there with a shaker in 15 minutes.
249
00:13:58,477 --> 00:14:00,342
No, no, no.
250
00:14:00,411 --> 00:14:03,048
No. No.
251
00:14:04,449 --> 00:14:06,185
Thank you.
252
00:14:10,520 --> 00:14:13,358
Joel:
You're doing good by him. You really are.
253
00:14:14,219 --> 00:14:15,460
Thank you.
254
00:14:37,782 --> 00:14:41,987
Oh, my fucking... God!
255
00:15:35,240 --> 00:15:36,475
Hi.
256
00:15:38,610 --> 00:15:40,842
Um, Mary Jo Miller?
257
00:15:40,911 --> 00:15:42,945
Oh, I'm sure you've got stories.
258
00:15:43,014 --> 00:15:44,680
Yeah. Is she in her room?
259
00:15:44,749 --> 00:15:46,986
- Yeah. You'll hear her.
- Thanks.
260
00:16:11,576 --> 00:16:13,475
Oh! Didn't see you there.
261
00:16:13,544 --> 00:16:16,111
MJ, you have a visitor.
262
00:16:16,180 --> 00:16:19,548
Hey, Mom! I was worried
I was gonna miss you.
263
00:16:19,617 --> 00:16:20,848
What are you doing here?
264
00:16:20,917 --> 00:16:23,585
Well, I wanted to visit you,
and Dad wanted to make sure
265
00:16:23,654 --> 00:16:25,053
that you have plenty
of clean underwear,
266
00:16:25,122 --> 00:16:26,154
so there's some in the drawer,
267
00:16:26,223 --> 00:16:27,389
and I put a little up here,
too, okay?
268
00:16:27,458 --> 00:16:29,390
That shithead
burnt my house down.
269
00:16:29,459 --> 00:16:31,259
No, Mom.
No, he didn't.
270
00:16:31,328 --> 00:16:35,296
- Yes, he did.
- No, he didn't.
271
00:16:35,365 --> 00:16:38,033
Have... Have you been smoking?
272
00:16:38,102 --> 00:16:40,063
Has she been smoking?
273
00:16:40,132 --> 00:16:42,471
- Nothing we can do about it.
- What are you doing, Mom?
274
00:16:42,540 --> 00:16:45,007
You don't smoke.
What's that about?
275
00:16:46,978 --> 00:16:49,311
Okay.
276
00:16:49,380 --> 00:16:51,647
Is there anything else
I can bring for you tomorrow?
277
00:16:51,716 --> 00:16:53,948
- No.
- Okay.
278
00:16:54,017 --> 00:16:57,319
Well, I'll see you
tomorrow, and just... -
279
00:16:57,388 --> 00:16:59,589
You know, thank you.
I guess.
280
00:17:01,158 --> 00:17:02,824
Hey, college mama.
How'd it go?
281
00:17:02,893 --> 00:17:04,994
Tricia:
Yeah, so do you and your buffer
282
00:17:05,063 --> 00:17:06,294
want to come over
for dinner?
283
00:17:06,363 --> 00:17:07,830
I made this--
way too much food.
284
00:17:07,899 --> 00:17:09,430
Casseroles.
I don't know. I'm just--
285
00:17:09,499 --> 00:17:12,067
- I'm not used to
cooking for one. - Yeah, I'll check with him.
286
00:17:12,136 --> 00:17:14,369
By the way, you owe me.
I just saw Mom.
287
00:17:14,438 --> 00:17:16,538
Jesus Christ.
288
00:17:16,607 --> 00:17:18,874
We are leaving as soon
as we finish eating.
289
00:17:18,943 --> 00:17:21,043
Copy that.
What's our safe word?
290
00:17:21,112 --> 00:17:22,744
- Tricia!
- Hello!
291
00:17:22,813 --> 00:17:25,214
- Hey.
- Tricia: Come on in.
292
00:17:25,283 --> 00:17:27,515
- "Juicy."
- Joel: "Juicy."
293
00:17:27,584 --> 00:17:31,086
This is fun.
Thank you for having us.
294
00:17:31,155 --> 00:17:35,424
Oh no! I'm so glad
you came. And Joel...
295
00:17:35,493 --> 00:17:38,559
I mean, have to give you
a little compliment.
296
00:17:38,628 --> 00:17:41,964
You almost make
Sam fun. Almost. -
297
00:17:42,033 --> 00:17:43,431
- Thanks.
- Thanks...
298
00:17:43,500 --> 00:17:45,600
So, of course, I've been
wondering and thinking
299
00:17:45,669 --> 00:17:47,169
about what this day
was gonna be like,
300
00:17:47,238 --> 00:17:49,872
and it was nothing
like I thought it would be.
301
00:17:49,941 --> 00:17:51,706
He wasn't even there.
302
00:17:51,775 --> 00:17:55,443
Well, I know there are
mixed emotions, but, you know,
303
00:17:55,512 --> 00:17:57,178
you should feel
proud of yourself.
304
00:17:57,247 --> 00:17:58,714
You raised a really
wonderful young woman.
305
00:17:58,783 --> 00:18:00,548
Thank you.
306
00:18:00,617 --> 00:18:03,653
You know, I've never really
been alone, like, not ever.
307
00:18:03,722 --> 00:18:05,220
I mean, this is it for me.
308
00:18:05,289 --> 00:18:07,155
I mean, you get
divorced at my age,
309
00:18:07,224 --> 00:18:09,085
that is the end. Done.
310
00:18:09,154 --> 00:18:10,692
I'll be alone forever,
and, you know, that's fine.
311
00:18:10,761 --> 00:18:13,362
It's not a big deal.
But, Sam, you've always been alone.
312
00:18:13,431 --> 00:18:16,431
I mean, you're good at it
or used to it or whatever.
313
00:18:16,500 --> 00:18:18,367
It's fine for you,
and that's fine.
314
00:18:18,436 --> 00:18:20,902
I just never thought that
I would end up like this.
315
00:18:20,971 --> 00:18:22,570
Just never saw it.
316
00:18:22,639 --> 00:18:26,007
Thought I'd be more like
Mom and Dad, like married forever.
317
00:18:26,076 --> 00:18:27,875
- Really?
- Tricia: Mm-hmm!
318
00:18:27,944 --> 00:18:30,345
- Heck yeah.
- Get treated like shit and fuckin'
319
00:18:30,414 --> 00:18:32,651
taken for granted like Dad?
320
00:18:33,618 --> 00:18:35,254
Mm, just...
321
00:18:36,487 --> 00:18:38,657
I don't wanna be
a divorced person.
322
00:18:39,456 --> 00:18:41,756
I don't... I'm not a div--
323
00:18:41,825 --> 00:18:44,627
I'm not the kind of person
who gets divorced.
324
00:18:44,696 --> 00:18:45,764
I don't...
325
00:18:46,792 --> 00:18:47,997
Well, you don't have to be.
326
00:18:48,066 --> 00:18:51,100
You could get back
together with Rick.
327
00:18:51,169 --> 00:18:52,871
Joel, he cheated.
328
00:18:53,671 --> 00:18:55,307
Or not. Or not.
329
00:18:56,106 --> 00:18:57,773
Tricia:
Well...
330
00:18:57,842 --> 00:18:59,474
Maybe I cheated, too.
331
00:18:59,543 --> 00:19:00,709
No, you didn't!
332
00:19:00,778 --> 00:19:02,177
You did?
333
00:19:02,246 --> 00:19:05,080
Well, I guess not technically,
334
00:19:05,149 --> 00:19:07,282
but, I mean, I did try.
335
00:19:07,351 --> 00:19:10,820
What are you talking about?
336
00:19:10,889 --> 00:19:13,021
Uh-hm.
337
00:19:13,090 --> 00:19:15,852
- I think I need more details.
- I'd like a few more myself.
338
00:19:15,921 --> 00:19:17,727
- Joel: I wanna know.
- With Coop.
339
00:19:17,796 --> 00:19:19,628
No!
340
00:19:19,697 --> 00:19:21,063
Yes!
341
00:19:21,132 --> 00:19:23,165
Well, she fucked my husband,
342
00:19:23,234 --> 00:19:26,001
- so I tried to fuck hers.
- Sam: Tricia!
343
00:19:26,070 --> 00:19:28,403
- Tricia: Hm?
- Now who's fun?
344
00:19:28,472 --> 00:19:30,539
I was so mad.
He turned me down, so... - Sam: Wha...
345
00:19:30,608 --> 00:19:32,974
Okay, th-then it
doesn't really count. - Tricia: Coop.
346
00:19:33,043 --> 00:19:34,442
Okay? Coop.
347
00:19:34,511 --> 00:19:37,746
Coop said no to this,
this whole situation.
348
00:19:37,815 --> 00:19:40,415
He was like, "No thanks."
I'm like, "What the fuck?
349
00:19:40,484 --> 00:19:42,985
Wh-who are you again?"
350
00:19:43,054 --> 00:19:45,653
Do you know what
a pencil test is, Joel?
351
00:19:45,722 --> 00:19:47,890
- Oh, here we go.
- Tricia: Okay. Pencil test.
352
00:19:47,959 --> 00:19:49,558
Do you wanna say it
or you want me to say it?
353
00:19:49,627 --> 00:19:51,460
- I guess you?
- Okay, I'll say it.
354
00:19:51,529 --> 00:19:53,462
- Joel: You can say it.
- Pencil test is if it stays--
355
00:19:53,531 --> 00:19:55,530
You put it under here,
and if it stays...
356
00:19:55,599 --> 00:19:57,032
Anyway, it's good if it falls.
357
00:19:57,101 --> 00:20:00,702
- Oh! Well, it did!
- Tricia: That was loud. Sorry!
358
00:20:00,771 --> 00:20:03,905
So, I pass the pencil test
even still.
359
00:20:03,974 --> 00:20:05,841
Even at my age.
Do you see it?
360
00:20:05,910 --> 00:20:07,509
What do you think?
361
00:20:07,578 --> 00:20:09,210
Joel, just tell her
she has great tits.
362
00:20:09,279 --> 00:20:10,715
Say it. You're not
even looking at 'em.
363
00:20:12,416 --> 00:20:14,615
You have great tits.
364
00:20:14,684 --> 00:20:17,252
- Why would you make me say that?
- 'Cause I wanted to hear it.
365
00:20:17,321 --> 00:20:18,854
Joel: Oh, my God.
366
00:20:18,923 --> 00:20:20,521
That did not sound good
coming outta my mouth.
367
00:20:20,590 --> 00:20:22,224
It was a little bit weird,
but I feel much better.
368
00:20:22,293 --> 00:20:23,591
Who wants more wine?
369
00:20:23,660 --> 00:20:25,827
I would like to know how
you feel about my tits, Joel.
370
00:20:27,165 --> 00:20:28,463
- You know how--
- Just look at 'em.
371
00:20:28,532 --> 00:20:30,799
You know how
a mother can't love...
372
00:20:30,868 --> 00:20:33,801
more-- her children
more than the other? - Whose do you like better?
373
00:20:33,870 --> 00:20:35,703
- If you had to pick?
- You know, it's equal love.
374
00:20:35,772 --> 00:20:37,505
- It's equal love.
- Do you like the pencil test pass,
375
00:20:37,574 --> 00:20:40,710
- or would you rather--
- Or what about the salad--
376
00:20:42,780 --> 00:20:46,181
If I don't win now,
you fucker.
377
00:20:48,419 --> 00:20:49,955
Is that what I think it is?
378
00:20:51,955 --> 00:20:54,089
♪ I love a teenie-tini,
would you like a teenie-tini? ♪
379
00:20:54,158 --> 00:20:55,590
♪ I'd like a teenie-tini, too ♪
380
00:20:55,659 --> 00:20:57,854
♪ That's one teenie-tini,
and another teenie-tini ♪
381
00:20:57,923 --> 00:21:00,966
Joel: Ooh!
382
00:21:03,701 --> 00:21:06,368
I guess it'll be
a teenier-tini.
383
00:21:06,437 --> 00:21:08,871
That's okay. I'll take
whatever you got. -
384
00:21:08,940 --> 00:21:12,073
Oh, we've earned it
after that dinner. Oh, my God.
385
00:21:14,512 --> 00:21:16,511
Okay. Okay. Oh.
386
00:21:16,580 --> 00:21:19,180
I guess one shouldn't
mix drinks
387
00:21:19,249 --> 00:21:21,549
when under the influence.
388
00:21:21,618 --> 00:21:24,756
Cheers. Thank you
for this. Cheers. - Cheers!
389
00:21:25,523 --> 00:21:26,521
Mm!
390
00:21:26,590 --> 00:21:29,658
Oh God. Tricia's a lot.
391
00:21:31,229 --> 00:21:33,762
Mm! Oh, my God,
how is your mom?
392
00:21:33,831 --> 00:21:37,198
Oh, she was wonderful.
Thank you so much for asking. - Aww.
393
00:21:37,267 --> 00:21:39,601
Was it just a real shit show?
394
00:21:39,670 --> 00:21:41,969
It was a shit show.
Do you know what she's doing now?
395
00:21:42,038 --> 00:21:44,907
- Hm?
- She is bumming cigarettes off of her fellow residents.
396
00:21:44,976 --> 00:21:46,475
Well, sure.
397
00:21:46,544 --> 00:21:48,509
She's a stroke victim.
Why wouldn't she? - Yes!
398
00:21:48,578 --> 00:21:50,378
I think she would
like another stroke.
399
00:21:50,447 --> 00:21:52,547
Oh no. Sorry.
400
00:21:52,616 --> 00:21:53,715
But you can't tell her
what to do!
401
00:21:53,784 --> 00:21:55,450
She just does whatever
the fuck she wants.
402
00:21:55,519 --> 00:21:57,286
I wouldn't even go visit her
if it weren't for my dad,
403
00:21:57,355 --> 00:21:58,988
but, you know, fuck.
404
00:21:59,057 --> 00:22:01,190
Ugh. You know what?
405
00:22:01,259 --> 00:22:03,559
- Hm?
- I think what you need is 30 CCs
406
00:22:03,628 --> 00:22:05,460
of Joel on your next visit.
407
00:22:05,529 --> 00:22:08,530
I am a very charming companion!
408
00:22:08,599 --> 00:22:11,233
Joel, I will not stand by
while my mother's a cunt to you.
409
00:22:13,637 --> 00:22:15,937
I'm sorry, but she cunt
help herself.
410
00:22:19,043 --> 00:22:20,175
I like gettin' lit.
411
00:22:23,380 --> 00:22:26,148
Cheers! Oh, my God.
412
00:22:26,217 --> 00:22:27,583
- Fred: Here he is!
- Oh, my God!
413
00:22:27,652 --> 00:22:29,284
- Sam: Jesus Christ!
- Hi, kids!
414
00:22:29,353 --> 00:22:31,420
I've missed you. How are you?
415
00:22:31,489 --> 00:22:33,689
- What are you doing here?
- Her pops called me.
416
00:22:33,758 --> 00:22:35,557
- What, he did?
- Fred: Yeah, he did.
417
00:22:35,626 --> 00:22:37,225
But you know what?
He just wanted to make sure
418
00:22:37,294 --> 00:22:39,161
that you're doing okay
and everything's okay at the farm.
419
00:22:39,230 --> 00:22:41,063
- Okay.
- Fred: And you know what? I gotta tell you, kids.
420
00:22:41,132 --> 00:22:43,431
I was getting a little cold
and bored up there in--
421
00:22:43,500 --> 00:22:45,934
thank you--
in Wisconsin, you know?
422
00:22:46,003 --> 00:22:47,803
- So, it was time to come home.
- Well, welcome back.
423
00:22:47,872 --> 00:22:49,572
- Thank you.
- Sam: Welcome back.
424
00:22:49,641 --> 00:22:52,168
Jesus, Sammy!
Oh my God,
425
00:22:52,237 --> 00:22:54,576
is this what it's come down to?
426
00:22:54,645 --> 00:22:55,911
It's a little
fluffy under there.
427
00:22:55,980 --> 00:22:57,812
It's like an Ewok's
on your lap. You see that?
428
00:22:57,881 --> 00:23:00,348
- You see that?
- Yeah, well, I'm a child of the '70s,
429
00:23:00,417 --> 00:23:02,617
and my bush should be
a reflection of that.
430
00:23:02,686 --> 00:23:04,086
Oh, how I missed you two.
431
00:23:04,155 --> 00:23:06,188
- Is it that bad?
- It's kinda bad.
432
00:23:06,257 --> 00:23:09,190
I'm so glad I finally get
to see the honeymoon suite.
433
00:23:09,259 --> 00:23:11,125
It's solely
a financial arrangement.
434
00:23:11,194 --> 00:23:14,257
A little marriage of
convenience. I get a cut. -
435
00:23:14,326 --> 00:23:17,032
So, I don't understand.
My dad will call you,
436
00:23:17,101 --> 00:23:18,167
but not his own daughters?
437
00:23:18,236 --> 00:23:19,401
Well, he doesn't
want you to think
438
00:23:19,470 --> 00:23:21,336
he's being overbearing
or micromanaging.
439
00:23:21,405 --> 00:23:22,966
Okay, so he sent you?
440
00:23:23,035 --> 00:23:25,073
Yeah. I'm the full package.
441
00:23:26,577 --> 00:23:28,910
Can you do that?
Can you just leave a sabbatical?
442
00:23:28,979 --> 00:23:31,680
It's, like, a really big deal
for you and your career, right?
443
00:23:31,749 --> 00:23:33,916
Look, kids,
nine months was enough,
444
00:23:33,985 --> 00:23:35,984
and I can finish
my research here.
445
00:23:36,053 --> 00:23:39,322
Well... Thank you, Fred.
446
00:23:39,391 --> 00:23:40,984
Hey, come on.
447
00:23:41,053 --> 00:23:42,891
- Anything for Ed.
- Yeah.
448
00:23:42,960 --> 00:23:45,094
But I guess we're fucked
for choir practice now.
449
00:23:45,163 --> 00:23:46,895
- No! No.
- Fred: I know.
450
00:23:46,964 --> 00:23:48,767
- We'll figure it out.
- We'll figure it out.
451
00:23:49,434 --> 00:23:51,366
And, um...
452
00:23:51,435 --> 00:23:54,135
uh, your dad did tell me
that MJ had a stroke.
453
00:23:54,204 --> 00:23:56,271
- Yeah.
- Fred: Sorry.
454
00:23:56,340 --> 00:23:58,873
Yeah, well,
it's harder on my dad.
455
00:23:58,942 --> 00:24:00,776
Then he was just pushing
himself to do all this stuff
456
00:24:00,845 --> 00:24:02,945
that he can't really do anymore.
457
00:24:03,014 --> 00:24:05,614
Well, you know,
he is a farmer. - Yeah.
458
00:24:05,683 --> 00:24:07,449
Plus renting out the land
and then the barn,
459
00:24:07,518 --> 00:24:08,850
it was just all too much.
460
00:24:08,919 --> 00:24:11,186
So, I was like,
"Dad, now's the time. Y-you have to go.
461
00:24:11,255 --> 00:24:13,155
You've never done
anything for yourself." - Joel: Mm.
462
00:24:13,224 --> 00:24:16,624
So, now he's on a boat with
his brother in Corpus Christi,
463
00:24:16,693 --> 00:24:18,226
probably drinking
a beer right now. -
464
00:24:18,295 --> 00:24:20,628
He is gonna have the best time.
We all know it. - The best time.
465
00:24:20,697 --> 00:24:22,630
You know he's raging
out there right now. -
466
00:24:22,699 --> 00:24:26,536
Oh, kids.
I-I know this is a lot, but we got this.
467
00:24:26,605 --> 00:24:28,070
- We got this.
- We got this.
468
00:24:28,139 --> 00:24:29,174
Fred:
And...
469
00:24:30,407 --> 00:24:32,975
I also brought back...
470
00:24:33,044 --> 00:24:35,145
cheese curds! Look at this.
471
00:24:36,675 --> 00:24:38,981
Put one in the freezer for Ed.
I know how he loves his cheese.
472
00:24:39,050 --> 00:24:40,382
He loves cheese.
473
00:24:40,451 --> 00:24:42,551
- One for you, buddy.
- Oh goodness! Thank you.
474
00:24:42,620 --> 00:24:44,347
Sam:
Well, I guess if we're partying,
475
00:24:44,416 --> 00:24:46,287
then maybe you're probably
wondering, like,
476
00:24:46,356 --> 00:24:48,490
what we've been up to
this whole time. - Alright. What do you got?
477
00:24:48,559 --> 00:24:49,759
Well, we like to drink
our teenie-tinis,
478
00:24:49,828 --> 00:24:51,493
and then we like to
open up the dance floor.
479
00:24:51,562 --> 00:24:53,994
Joel: Oh, my God, this is
the song! This is the song! -
480
00:24:54,063 --> 00:24:56,764
Turning it up!
Okay, Sammy and Joel! - What are you doing?
481
00:24:56,833 --> 00:24:58,967
- You gotta get up on your feet.
- You want me to join?
482
00:24:59,036 --> 00:25:01,102
- Yeah, get the fuck up!
- Alright, shit!
483
00:25:01,171 --> 00:25:03,271
- ♪ When you decide
you like yourself ♪ - Holler at me!
484
00:25:03,340 --> 00:25:04,940
- Oh, okay!
- ♪ When you decide you need someone ♪
485
00:25:05,009 --> 00:25:06,674
- Holler at me!
- Holler at me! Feel the spirit!
486
00:25:06,743 --> 00:25:09,912
- Holler at me!
- Holler at me! Oh, my God, my pelvic floor just dropped!
487
00:25:11,743 --> 00:25:13,882
- All: Holler at me!
- Fred: Do I have to do it like this?
488
00:25:13,951 --> 00:25:16,051
All: Holler at me!
489
00:25:16,120 --> 00:25:18,853
- All: Holler at me!
- Sam: Oh! Shit, I can't breathe!
490
00:25:18,922 --> 00:25:21,757
- We did it! Okay.
- Joel: I need to stop. I need to stop!
491
00:25:47,451 --> 00:25:49,451
- Joel!
- Joel: Yeah?
492
00:25:49,520 --> 00:25:51,723
How many active
hours do you have?
493
00:25:53,524 --> 00:25:55,224
Ten.
494
00:25:55,293 --> 00:25:57,026
Sam:
Oh, that's good.
495
00:25:57,095 --> 00:25:59,328
Is... is 13 better?
496
00:26:02,500 --> 00:26:04,136
I guess it's technic--
497
00:26:04,969 --> 00:26:08,270
Oh, are you fucking kidding me?
498
00:26:08,339 --> 00:26:09,975
- What?
- Joel: No.
499
00:26:10,775 --> 00:26:12,673
They gave me two stars!
500
00:26:12,742 --> 00:26:15,877
They say I have
non-absorptive bath towels!
501
00:26:15,946 --> 00:26:17,679
Fuck them!
I picked out those towels!
502
00:26:17,748 --> 00:26:20,182
Your dog shit all over my house!
503
00:26:20,251 --> 00:26:22,084
Oh, these motherfuckers!
504
00:26:22,153 --> 00:26:24,453
Joel, we're gonna find 'em
and burn 'em alive.
505
00:26:24,522 --> 00:26:28,051
- I'm gonna write a letter!
- To who?
506
00:26:28,120 --> 00:26:30,259
I don't know.
507
00:26:31,896 --> 00:26:34,699
- Okay, you ready?
- Yeah.
508
00:26:35,466 --> 00:26:38,100
- Lights out.
- Alright.
509
00:26:39,671 --> 00:26:41,437
- Nighty-night.
- Nighty-night.
510
00:26:46,144 --> 00:26:48,380
My beautiful,
perfect rating...
511
00:26:51,849 --> 00:26:54,049
- Night, Joel.
- Good night.
512
00:26:57,087 --> 00:26:58,388
Sweet dweams!
513
00:27:03,694 --> 00:27:05,293
♪ Hit me with your eyes ♪
514
00:27:05,362 --> 00:27:07,996
♪ I never seen
that kind of view ♪
515
00:27:08,065 --> 00:27:09,792
♪ You walkin' over here ♪
516
00:27:09,861 --> 00:27:12,567
♪ The way that it went down,
that's when I knew ♪
517
00:27:12,636 --> 00:27:14,202
♪ We be talkin' all night ♪
518
00:27:14,271 --> 00:27:17,973
♪ But I can tell you need
to work on you, you, you ♪
519
00:27:18,042 --> 00:27:20,309
♪ Like you, you, you ♪
520
00:27:20,378 --> 00:27:22,445
♪ Like you ♪
521
00:27:22,514 --> 00:27:24,183
♪ Like you ♪
522
00:27:24,782 --> 00:27:26,548
♪ Mm ♪
523
00:27:26,617 --> 00:27:28,016
♪ You be playin' sweet ♪
524
00:27:28,085 --> 00:27:31,181
♪ But, baby, don't you
know that talk is cheap ♪
525
00:27:31,250 --> 00:27:32,487
♪ Can't fool me ♪
526
00:27:32,556 --> 00:27:36,057
♪ I wish that you could
back it up for me, me, me ♪
527
00:27:36,126 --> 00:27:39,928
♪ Like me, me, me, like me ♪
528
00:27:39,997 --> 00:27:42,325
♪ You know that I ♪
529
00:27:42,394 --> 00:27:44,533
♪ I heard it all before ♪
530
00:27:44,602 --> 00:27:46,769
♪ You're hesitant ♪
531
00:27:46,838 --> 00:27:49,004
♪ But you could give me more ♪
532
00:27:49,073 --> 00:27:51,440
♪ I know you like ♪
533
00:27:51,509 --> 00:27:53,875
♪ To play those silly games ♪
534
00:27:53,944 --> 00:27:57,312
♪ When you're done,
call my name ♪
535
00:27:57,381 --> 00:27:59,875
♪ When you decide you like
yourself, holler at me ♪
536
00:27:59,944 --> 00:28:02,050
♪ When you decide you need
someone, call up on me ♪
537
00:28:02,119 --> 00:28:04,019
♪ When you don't have
to think about it ♪
538
00:28:04,088 --> 00:28:07,326
♪ Love me at the ungodly hour ♪
40527
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