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1
00:00:03,870 --> 00:00:06,237
Good morning, harry.
2
00:00:06,239 --> 00:00:07,305
What are you eating?
3
00:00:07,307 --> 00:00:09,307
New cereal.
4
00:00:09,309 --> 00:00:10,976
"Monopoly"?
5
00:00:12,412 --> 00:00:15,213
Finally... A cereal
About real estate.
6
00:00:16,550 --> 00:00:18,717
Uh, harry, that's
A game, like "Life."
7
00:00:18,719 --> 00:00:20,985
Life's a cereal too.
8
00:00:20,987 --> 00:00:23,288
- and a magazine.
- yeah, and a bowl
Of cherries,
9
00:00:23,290 --> 00:00:26,391
But that doesn't change
The fact that you're eating
Little plastic houses.
10
00:00:26,393 --> 00:00:29,895
Plastic, no.
These houses are just stale.
11
00:00:29,897 --> 00:00:32,130
( plastic cracks )
12
00:00:34,501 --> 00:00:36,401
Stale plastic!
13
00:00:36,403 --> 00:00:39,170
Sally, did you take my blue
Suit to the dry-cleaners?
14
00:00:39,172 --> 00:00:41,807
Oh, no, it was too expensive,
So I dry-cleaned it myself.
15
00:00:41,809 --> 00:00:44,375
Here.
16
00:00:44,377 --> 00:00:47,779
I think I may have
Sanded off a button,
But--
17
00:00:47,781 --> 00:00:50,682
- you ruined this suit!
- I knew you were gonna
Say that.
18
00:00:50,684 --> 00:00:53,085
Mary wants me to wear this
To our party tomorrow night.
19
00:00:53,087 --> 00:00:55,019
Uh, wait,
Don't you mean
her party?
20
00:00:55,021 --> 00:00:57,822
No,
ours, it's
The first party
We're hosting together.
21
00:00:57,824 --> 00:00:59,858
So exactly which part
Of the party is yours?
22
00:00:59,860 --> 00:01:02,627
Oh, I'm in charge
Of the hors d'oeuvres.
23
00:01:02,629 --> 00:01:04,763
I've chosen
Miniature egg rolls.
24
00:01:04,765 --> 00:01:07,132
Oh. Well, you know,
Brown goes with egg rolls.
25
00:01:07,134 --> 00:01:08,800
Why don't you wear
Your brown suit?
26
00:01:08,802 --> 00:01:10,302
No, mary wants the blue.
27
00:01:10,304 --> 00:01:12,204
And if mary wants the blue,
Mary gets the blue.
28
00:01:12,206 --> 00:01:14,840
Uh, permission to state
The obvious, high commander?
29
00:01:14,842 --> 00:01:18,243
- permission granted.
- you are so whipped.
30
00:01:22,216 --> 00:01:25,717
- excuse me?
- yeah, dick,
Whipped like pudding.
31
00:01:27,354 --> 00:01:30,555
Pudding-whipped?
I'm not pudding-whipped.
32
00:01:30,557 --> 00:01:32,490
The woman tells you
How to act.
33
00:01:32,492 --> 00:01:34,625
- and what to say.
- and what to think.
34
00:01:34,627 --> 00:01:36,094
- and how to act.
- I said that.
35
00:01:36,096 --> 00:01:37,362
I know, I just wanted in.
36
00:01:37,364 --> 00:01:39,264
Look, I will say this
Once and once only.
37
00:01:39,266 --> 00:01:41,733
I am the high commander
And nobody has control
Of my life,
38
00:01:41,735 --> 00:01:43,401
Especially mary,
Is that understood?
39
00:01:43,403 --> 00:01:45,070
- all: yes, sir.
- good.
40
00:01:45,072 --> 00:01:47,239
Sally, pour me a cup
Of coffee and a bowl
Of monopoly.
41
00:01:47,241 --> 00:01:48,706
But, sir--
42
00:01:48,708 --> 00:01:53,111
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah.
The high commander
Has spoken.
43
00:01:54,948 --> 00:01:58,283
( plastic rattling )
44
00:02:06,626 --> 00:02:08,560
( '50s rock music playing )
45
00:02:39,460 --> 00:02:42,995
Nina, do you think
I'm whipped?
46
00:02:45,399 --> 00:02:47,866
- "Whipped"?
- ( chuckles )
47
00:02:47,868 --> 00:02:51,770
- I know, it's crazy.
- ( laughs ) by dr. Albright?
48
00:02:51,772 --> 00:02:55,707
What was I thinking?
49
00:02:55,709 --> 00:02:58,476
- dr. Solomon...
- yes, nina.
50
00:02:58,478 --> 00:03:02,247
You are wrapped around
That woman's finger
Like a yo-yo.
51
00:03:03,984 --> 00:03:06,751
And she is always
Walking the dog.
52
00:03:10,056 --> 00:03:13,525
- mary, we need to talk.
- oh, dick can it wait?
I'm late for class.
53
00:03:13,527 --> 00:03:16,728
Mary, I will not be wearing
My blue suit to our party
Tomorrow night.
54
00:03:16,730 --> 00:03:19,097
That's okay.
55
00:03:19,099 --> 00:03:20,932
You're positive,
It's all right?
56
00:03:20,934 --> 00:03:23,268
- sure.
- oh, great.
57
00:03:23,270 --> 00:03:26,037
( sighs ) that's great.
I'll wear my brown suit.
58
00:03:26,039 --> 00:03:28,239
Uh, no, no, no.
59
00:03:28,241 --> 00:03:32,077
Why don't you wear \
Your blue blazer and khakis?
60
00:03:32,079 --> 00:03:34,746
Okay.
61
00:03:34,748 --> 00:03:38,016
And you really
Should get a haircut
Before tomorrow night.
62
00:03:38,018 --> 00:03:41,052
- you can go at lunch.
- no, absolutely not!
63
00:03:41,054 --> 00:03:43,354
I'll go at 2:00.
64
00:03:48,028 --> 00:03:50,294
Damn!
65
00:03:50,296 --> 00:03:52,263
One, two, three, four--
66
00:03:52,265 --> 00:03:54,900
Eh, eh, you're not
The top hat, I'm the top
Hat. You're the boot.
67
00:03:54,902 --> 00:03:56,701
- I'm not the boot.
- harry, who's the boot?
68
00:03:56,703 --> 00:04:01,005
Sally said she wanted
To be the boot, because
It reminded her of a boot.
69
00:04:02,376 --> 00:04:04,243
Fine, I'm the boot.
70
00:04:04,245 --> 00:04:07,178
One, two, three, four, five.
Community chest.
71
00:04:07,180 --> 00:04:11,717
"You have won second prize
In a beauty contest.
Collect $10."
72
00:04:11,719 --> 00:04:15,286
Ooh, $10, you must be
Real pretty.
73
00:04:15,288 --> 00:04:18,556
Yeah, pretty close
To owning your knobby butt.
74
00:04:18,558 --> 00:04:22,260
Now roll the dice,
You long-haired alien freak.
75
00:04:23,664 --> 00:04:25,563
Now, one, two, three,
76
00:04:25,565 --> 00:04:27,131
Four, five, six, seven,
Eight, nine.
77
00:04:27,133 --> 00:04:28,733
Oh.
( sighs )
78
00:04:28,735 --> 00:04:33,037
"Go to jail."
Go directly to jail.
79
00:04:33,039 --> 00:04:36,508
Do not pass "Go,"
Do not collect $200,
80
00:04:36,510 --> 00:04:40,945
And do not, I repeat,
Do not drop the soap.
81
00:04:44,451 --> 00:04:47,853
And so you will see
That a equals dv
82
00:04:47,855 --> 00:04:52,090
- over dt which equals d
Over dt, enclosed--
- ( students laugh )
83
00:04:52,092 --> 00:04:56,327
Oh, good, I'm glad
You find newton's laws
In vector notation
84
00:04:56,329 --> 00:04:58,896
As hilariously
Misconceived as I do.
85
00:04:58,898 --> 00:05:01,365
It's not why they're
Laughing, dr. Solomon.
86
00:05:01,367 --> 00:05:03,602
They're laughing
Because of this.
87
00:05:03,604 --> 00:05:05,570
A woman in a cocktail dress?
88
00:05:05,572 --> 00:05:07,238
Turn it upside down.
89
00:05:10,510 --> 00:05:14,412
Oh, my...
90
00:05:14,414 --> 00:05:19,117
I'm sorry, I'll have
To confiscate this
Until I'm through.
91
00:05:19,119 --> 00:05:22,721
Dr. Solomon, can I get that
Back? It's for my brother's
Bachelor party.
92
00:05:22,723 --> 00:05:24,723
- bachelor party?
- he's getting married,
93
00:05:24,725 --> 00:05:27,025
And all the guys are
Taking him to a strip club.
94
00:05:27,027 --> 00:05:28,860
Strip club?
95
00:05:28,862 --> 00:05:31,396
"Roy's house of class."
96
00:05:31,398 --> 00:05:33,098
Why wasn't I invited?
97
00:05:33,100 --> 00:05:36,301
But dr. Solomon, it's
Just a pathetic excuse
98
00:05:36,303 --> 00:05:38,369
For guys to get together
And behave like pigs.
99
00:05:38,371 --> 00:05:40,238
So why wasn't I invited?
100
00:05:40,240 --> 00:05:43,407
Well, dr. Solomon,
We just didn't think
That maybe you...
101
00:05:43,409 --> 00:05:47,612
No, you think that I'm
Too whipped to go to your
Twisted little soirée?
102
00:05:47,614 --> 00:05:49,781
- sorry, dr. Solomon.
- apology accepted.
103
00:05:49,783 --> 00:05:51,415
Just tell me where it is
And I'll be there.
104
00:05:51,417 --> 00:05:55,787
Well, uh...
We don't exactly have
A time set yet--
105
00:05:55,789 --> 00:05:58,590
Yeah, we're not really even
Sure with the wind and...
106
00:06:00,594 --> 00:06:03,161
8:00 tomorrow night.
107
00:06:03,163 --> 00:06:04,863
He was staring right at me.
108
00:06:04,865 --> 00:06:08,333
Friday night, 8:00,
109
00:06:08,335 --> 00:06:13,071
"Roy's house of class."
110
00:06:17,677 --> 00:06:22,179
Ow, ow, ow, oww!
111
00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:28,720
Next time,
My answer is paper.
112
00:06:28,722 --> 00:06:32,390
Oh, dick, would you
Do me a favor for
Tomorrow night?
113
00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:34,559
Would you keep an eye
On sal talbert?
114
00:06:34,561 --> 00:06:37,228
Last party,
I think he tried on
Some of my teddies,
115
00:06:37,230 --> 00:06:39,363
They were stretched out
In the strangest places.
116
00:06:41,067 --> 00:06:44,735
Oh, don't open those,
I want that fresh
For the tapenade.
117
00:06:44,737 --> 00:06:49,274
If I had something
I had to do tomorrow
Night-- something else--
118
00:06:49,276 --> 00:06:51,042
You'd understand,
Wouldn't you?
119
00:06:51,044 --> 00:06:53,578
Dick, we've been planning
This party for weeks.
120
00:06:53,580 --> 00:06:55,480
All your boring
Physics friends
Are coming.
121
00:06:55,482 --> 00:06:57,516
Well, I-- I know,
122
00:06:57,518 --> 00:07:01,353
But it's an emergency--
An emergency bachelor party
At roy's house of class.
123
00:07:03,457 --> 00:07:08,360
- who's getting married?
- bug's brother, fred--
Or frank, or something.
124
00:07:08,362 --> 00:07:12,430
You're going to abandon me
To go to a party for someone
You don't even know?
125
00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:13,932
Pitman's going.
126
00:07:13,934 --> 00:07:16,901
- this whole party
Was your idea.
- no, it wasn't.
127
00:07:16,903 --> 00:07:18,970
- yes, it was! Yes, it was!
- no, it wasn't! No, it wasn't!
128
00:07:18,972 --> 00:07:21,405
Yes, it was-- we were
At "The sea shanty"
With the sullivans.
129
00:07:21,407 --> 00:07:23,274
You were having crab cakes,
Which you hated.
130
00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:25,543
They sang "Happy birthday"
To the kid at the next table.
131
00:07:25,545 --> 00:07:27,746
You jumped up and said
"I wanna have a party too!"
132
00:07:27,748 --> 00:07:29,781
Oh, that is
Absolutely untrue!
133
00:07:29,783 --> 00:07:32,117
Dick, this is your party.
134
00:07:32,119 --> 00:07:34,385
You can't leave me alone
With those physics guys.
135
00:07:34,387 --> 00:07:38,590
- I have nothing
To say to them!
- fine, I'll be here.
136
00:07:38,592 --> 00:07:41,025
Who needs fun anyway?
137
00:07:44,864 --> 00:07:48,266
I want tennessee.
138
00:07:48,268 --> 00:07:51,202
You already own the railroads
And all the utilities.
139
00:07:51,204 --> 00:07:55,473
I need tennessee.
I need it bad.
140
00:07:55,475 --> 00:07:58,343
You just need to be
The big man, don't you?
141
00:07:58,345 --> 00:08:01,946
Well, you know what, tommy?
It's the little ones.
142
00:08:01,948 --> 00:08:06,017
The ones who labor to build
Houses on the baltics
And the mediterranean,
143
00:08:06,019 --> 00:08:08,720
The ones who pay school
Taxes and property taxes.
144
00:08:08,722 --> 00:08:11,256
The ones who are happy
Just to get a bank error
In their favor.
145
00:08:11,258 --> 00:08:13,458
For they're the ones, tommy!
146
00:08:13,460 --> 00:08:16,027
The ones who own
This country.
147
00:08:16,029 --> 00:08:18,563
I'll give you $400 and
My "Get out of jail free" card.
148
00:08:18,565 --> 00:08:21,098
Thank you very much.
149
00:08:23,069 --> 00:08:26,671
I have made
A command decision.
I am no longer whipped.
150
00:08:26,673 --> 00:08:27,972
Good for you.
151
00:08:27,974 --> 00:08:30,274
I'm tired of feeling
Like a catholic schoolboy
152
00:08:30,276 --> 00:08:33,645
Always getting his knuckles
Wrapped by the nun
He's dating.
153
00:08:33,647 --> 00:08:36,948
So, what's sister mary albright
Gonna say about this?
154
00:08:36,950 --> 00:08:40,585
She'll just have to accept it,
Because I'm the man!
155
00:08:40,587 --> 00:08:43,821
I'm stronger than she is,
I have a larger cranium.
156
00:08:43,823 --> 00:08:47,958
I'm far more likely
To go to prison.
I'm the man!
157
00:08:47,960 --> 00:08:51,463
Now, if I could just find
Someone who could teach me
How to act like one.
158
00:08:51,465 --> 00:08:54,199
- tommy.
- ( laughs mockingly )
159
00:08:56,936 --> 00:08:58,069
I'm sorry,
160
00:08:58,071 --> 00:08:59,970
But before you teach him
How to be a man,
161
00:08:59,972 --> 00:09:02,474
Shouldn't you get
August's permission first?
162
00:09:02,476 --> 00:09:05,577
She-- she told me
Not to call her until
After dinner.
163
00:09:06,847 --> 00:09:09,947
Problem is that you both
Had your masculine energy
164
00:09:09,949 --> 00:09:13,150
Zapped by blond
Chick goddesses.
165
00:09:13,152 --> 00:09:17,088
Guess that makes me
The only real man
In the room.
166
00:09:19,826 --> 00:09:21,859
Not even sally
Can make that claim.
167
00:09:23,129 --> 00:09:25,129
That's true.
How do you do it?
168
00:09:25,131 --> 00:09:28,766
Who, me?
( belches )
169
00:09:28,768 --> 00:09:31,336
By keeping it real, dick.
170
00:09:33,506 --> 00:09:34,872
Keeping it real.
171
00:09:34,874 --> 00:09:37,008
You think you could help me?
172
00:09:37,010 --> 00:09:40,244
Follow me.
173
00:09:43,817 --> 00:09:45,817
So, uh...
174
00:09:45,819 --> 00:09:49,487
You wanna watch
The pencil-neck
Leading the hen-pecked?
175
00:09:49,489 --> 00:09:51,990
Oh, so I take it
You're forfeiting,
176
00:09:51,992 --> 00:09:55,593
'cause either you're
Rolling these dice
Or you're forfeiting.
177
00:09:57,664 --> 00:10:01,032
Ha! "Free parking,"
Loser!
178
00:10:02,502 --> 00:10:05,369
First of all,
You need a manly name.
179
00:10:05,371 --> 00:10:07,839
"Dick" is so... Girly.
180
00:10:11,712 --> 00:10:14,512
You need something hip,
Something sexy,
181
00:10:14,514 --> 00:10:16,347
Something that says,
"I'm a real man,"
182
00:10:16,349 --> 00:10:19,550
Something like...
"Manny."
183
00:10:23,089 --> 00:10:25,522
Harley.
184
00:10:25,524 --> 00:10:27,658
Tubby.
185
00:10:27,660 --> 00:10:30,394
Batman.
186
00:10:31,898 --> 00:10:34,966
- how 'bout "Solom-oh-n"?
- ooh-oh!
187
00:10:34,968 --> 00:10:38,769
Oh, I like that.
"Dick solomon..."
188
00:10:38,771 --> 00:10:41,772
Hi, I'm dick solomon.
189
00:10:41,774 --> 00:10:44,775
How much are those pliers?
190
00:10:44,777 --> 00:10:47,778
( squirms )
No, no...
191
00:10:47,780 --> 00:10:52,283
No, don't look at your
Fingernails like that.
It's not manly.
192
00:10:52,285 --> 00:10:54,585
This way.
193
00:10:54,587 --> 00:10:56,888
Manly.
194
00:10:56,890 --> 00:11:00,491
Not manly.
Very manly.
195
00:11:00,493 --> 00:11:02,861
Manly no, manly yes.
196
00:11:05,732 --> 00:11:06,898
How 'bout scratching?
197
00:11:06,900 --> 00:11:09,600
Outside the pants, manly.
198
00:11:13,206 --> 00:11:16,708
- inside the pants?
- ( scoffs ) too manly.
199
00:11:18,244 --> 00:11:20,545
This is so
hard, harry.
200
00:11:20,547 --> 00:11:22,980
How does a real man
Know what to do?
201
00:11:22,982 --> 00:11:25,116
( grunts )
Look deep inside yourself.
202
00:11:25,118 --> 00:11:27,952
Find your primal instincts.
( primate yelps )
203
00:11:27,954 --> 00:11:31,155
( imitates gorilla growling )
204
00:11:31,157 --> 00:11:33,124
Hey.
205
00:11:34,661 --> 00:11:37,294
( growling continues )
206
00:11:37,296 --> 00:11:40,097
Now let it come out,
Slowly.
207
00:11:40,099 --> 00:11:43,567
- ( growling intensifies )
- ( yelping continues )
208
00:11:44,671 --> 00:11:47,305
Okay, now let it go,
Let it go.
209
00:11:49,075 --> 00:11:52,310
- hey, baby,
What's shaking?
- harry:
ooh!
210
00:11:56,249 --> 00:11:58,149
There you go.
211
00:11:58,151 --> 00:12:01,352
Now... Walk the walk.
212
00:12:05,792 --> 00:12:07,792
Now talk the talk.
213
00:12:07,794 --> 00:12:09,827
Hey, mama,
214
00:12:09,829 --> 00:12:13,698
I got ants in my pants
And they make me do
The hula dance.
215
00:12:15,234 --> 00:12:17,001
- you the man.
- no, you the man.
216
00:12:17,003 --> 00:12:18,902
- no, you the man.
- no, you the man.
217
00:12:18,904 --> 00:12:21,105
- no, you--
- damn it, harry,
I'm the high commander!
218
00:12:21,107 --> 00:12:23,407
If I say "You the man,"
You the man.
219
00:12:23,409 --> 00:12:25,977
Okay, okay.
220
00:12:25,979 --> 00:12:28,079
I'm the man.
221
00:12:33,719 --> 00:12:35,653
( women whispering )
222
00:12:39,459 --> 00:12:41,860
Good morning, ladies.
223
00:12:41,862 --> 00:12:44,061
Hey, judith,
224
00:12:44,063 --> 00:12:46,831
Did those fries
Come with soup?
225
00:12:49,335 --> 00:12:53,137
I'd sue him if I knew
What he was talking about.
226
00:12:54,207 --> 00:12:56,207
Oow!
227
00:12:56,209 --> 00:12:59,777
- hey, did it hurt?
- what?
228
00:12:59,779 --> 00:13:03,147
- when you fell from heaven?
- oh!
229
00:13:03,149 --> 00:13:05,783
What's that smell?
230
00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:08,352
That's the scent
Of a man...
231
00:13:09,856 --> 00:13:12,023
And brut.
232
00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:22,633
Go home and take a shower.
233
00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:25,470
You steel wool.
The party's tonight.
234
00:13:25,472 --> 00:13:27,772
What makes you think
I'm coming to our
Little party?
235
00:13:27,774 --> 00:13:31,942
This eldorado is leaving
For "Roy's house of class."
236
00:13:34,948 --> 00:13:37,548
Is this a test
To see how pissed I can get?
237
00:13:37,550 --> 00:13:40,218
Oh, come on, mary,
You can't run my life.
238
00:13:40,220 --> 00:13:42,921
- your what?
- I have to be my own man.
239
00:13:42,923 --> 00:13:46,657
Fine.
Go ahead.
240
00:13:46,659 --> 00:13:48,359
Go to "The house of class."
241
00:13:48,361 --> 00:13:51,896
Leave me alone to entertain
Your friends.
242
00:13:54,367 --> 00:13:57,334
That was easier
Than I thought.
243
00:13:57,336 --> 00:13:59,270
Oh!
244
00:14:02,342 --> 00:14:04,408
- I tell you
What you're gonna do.
- what am I gonna do?
245
00:14:04,410 --> 00:14:06,911
You're giving me marvin gardens.
I'm giving you waterworks
And st. Charles.
246
00:14:06,913 --> 00:14:09,947
- I don't want waterworks.
- I'm giving you waterworks,
St. Charles and $200.
247
00:14:09,949 --> 00:14:11,582
- you're taking the deal.
- I'm not taking the deal.
248
00:14:11,584 --> 00:14:13,618
- $400, take a deal!
- $500!
249
00:14:13,620 --> 00:14:16,620
( laughs )
Deal! You're gonna
Like this deal.
250
00:14:23,830 --> 00:14:26,397
Tommy, dick and I are going
To the bachelor party,
Wanna come?
251
00:14:26,399 --> 00:14:28,266
Does it look like
I have time for strippers?
252
00:14:28,268 --> 00:14:30,101
I'm playing
Freaking monopoly here.
253
00:14:31,838 --> 00:14:35,239
Come on, harry, let's make
Like a banana split
And leave.
254
00:14:37,176 --> 00:14:39,276
Boy, don't you look stupid.
255
00:14:39,278 --> 00:14:42,914
You're just upset
'cause you have to be
Pretending to be my sister
256
00:14:42,916 --> 00:14:45,750
And can't get any play.
257
00:14:45,752 --> 00:14:47,652
Yeah, right.
258
00:14:47,654 --> 00:14:50,054
Hey, dick,
259
00:14:50,056 --> 00:14:52,823
Why don't you
Slip one of these
In your wallet?
260
00:14:52,825 --> 00:14:54,825
Might come in handy.
261
00:14:54,827 --> 00:14:58,062
A moist towelette?
262
00:14:58,064 --> 00:15:01,432
In case they serve ribs.
263
00:15:05,071 --> 00:15:06,971
( all cheering )
264
00:15:06,973 --> 00:15:10,507
Ow, my god,
I love you.
I love you!
265
00:15:10,509 --> 00:15:13,344
I'm an ice cream sandwich.
266
00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:17,081
Okay, dick...
267
00:15:17,083 --> 00:15:18,916
The thing about
These women is
268
00:15:18,918 --> 00:15:20,584
You've got
To play it cool.
269
00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:23,688
Just ignore 'em,
Pretend they're
Not even here.
270
00:15:23,690 --> 00:15:25,690
Can I get you
Something to drink?
271
00:15:25,692 --> 00:15:28,892
( yelps, thumps )
272
00:15:30,163 --> 00:15:31,829
Oh, man, solomon's here.
273
00:15:31,831 --> 00:15:35,633
- hi there.
- well, hello.
274
00:15:35,635 --> 00:15:37,935
How'd you like to buy
A bottle of champagne?
275
00:15:37,937 --> 00:15:40,438
- how much?
- $75.
276
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:42,473
What, for a bottle of champagne?
Are you crazy?
277
00:15:42,475 --> 00:15:45,209
How 'bout if I sit down
And drink it with you?
278
00:15:45,211 --> 00:15:47,879
Well, then you should
Buy it yourself.
279
00:15:47,881 --> 00:15:50,214
I mean, at least
Pay for half.
280
00:15:53,186 --> 00:15:56,420
Roll the dice.
281
00:15:56,422 --> 00:15:59,323
I'm down to nothing,
Tommy, I've got
To pass "Go."
282
00:15:59,325 --> 00:16:03,060
Sally, the dice are
Gonna do what they're
Gonna do, let 'em fly.
283
00:16:03,062 --> 00:16:06,097
( kisses dice )
284
00:16:06,099 --> 00:16:10,435
( gasps )
Boardwalk. No!
285
00:16:10,437 --> 00:16:13,805
With a hotel, that $2,000!
286
00:16:13,807 --> 00:16:17,875
( sobbing )
I only got $600,
Tommy, $600!
287
00:16:17,877 --> 00:16:20,744
- mortgage another property.
- I mortgaged them all.
288
00:16:20,746 --> 00:16:22,546
Really?
289
00:16:22,548 --> 00:16:24,415
Well, you know
What that means.
290
00:16:24,417 --> 00:16:26,150
It means I lost?
291
00:16:26,152 --> 00:16:27,217
- no.
- no?
292
00:16:27,219 --> 00:16:29,487
It means I won.
293
00:16:29,489 --> 00:16:31,856
I won!
294
00:16:31,858 --> 00:16:35,293
Oh, you're the warrior,
You think that you can
Win anything.
295
00:16:35,295 --> 00:16:39,830
- but not this time, pally.
This time you're the loser!
- ( grunts )
296
00:16:39,832 --> 00:16:42,366
Oh, sally, sally...
297
00:16:42,368 --> 00:16:43,768
And you know
What the best part is?
298
00:16:43,770 --> 00:16:47,337
- no, what?
- the loser cleans up.
299
00:16:50,143 --> 00:16:52,477
Fine.
300
00:16:52,479 --> 00:16:54,678
What-- what are you
Doing? Hey! What--
301
00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:58,015
-
( pieces rattle )
-
( garbage disposal rumbles )
302
00:16:59,685 --> 00:17:03,054
( disposal stops )
303
00:17:03,056 --> 00:17:06,023
Okay, that felt good.
304
00:17:09,529 --> 00:17:11,462
Oh, I'm so horny.
305
00:17:19,839 --> 00:17:21,772
Oh, yeah, yeah...
306
00:17:21,774 --> 00:17:25,309
You're a woman,
You're half naked,
I'm a guy, yeah, I get it.
307
00:17:26,879 --> 00:17:29,113
Tell me, are you
Enjoying yourself?
308
00:17:29,115 --> 00:17:31,282
Oh, yeah.
309
00:17:31,284 --> 00:17:34,885
- do you think we partied
Long enough?
- oh, yeah.
310
00:17:34,887 --> 00:17:39,523
We've been here almost--
Wow, 12 minutes.
311
00:17:39,525 --> 00:17:42,859
How long do you think
We have to stay so these
Guys don't think we're...
312
00:17:42,861 --> 00:17:44,095
- you know...
- women?
313
00:17:44,097 --> 00:17:46,964
- yeah.
- five seconds.
314
00:17:46,966 --> 00:17:48,666
- oh, yeah.
- walk that around.
315
00:17:48,668 --> 00:17:50,268
- shake that thing.
- who's your daddy?
316
00:17:50,270 --> 00:17:51,769
- come to papa.
- bang, bang.
317
00:17:51,771 --> 00:17:53,804
- ow!
- ow!
318
00:17:53,806 --> 00:17:55,973
All right, let's go.
319
00:17:59,512 --> 00:18:00,811
- huh-uh.
- uh-huh.
320
00:18:00,813 --> 00:18:02,013
- huh-uh...
- uh-huh...
321
00:18:02,015 --> 00:18:03,147
- huh-uh.
- uh-huh.
322
00:18:03,149 --> 00:18:05,483
Mary, settle this one for us.
323
00:18:05,485 --> 00:18:08,052
Who is the more
Original physicist--
324
00:18:08,054 --> 00:18:11,222
Niels bohr
Or max planck?
325
00:18:13,092 --> 00:18:15,659
Planck, definitely planck.
326
00:18:15,661 --> 00:18:18,161
There's so much food here,
It's like a white hole
327
00:18:18,163 --> 00:18:20,431
And the black hole
Is at the a&p.
328
00:18:20,433 --> 00:18:23,968
- that's a good one.
- oh, great.
329
00:18:23,970 --> 00:18:27,972
These are the dullest
People I've ever met.
330
00:18:27,974 --> 00:18:31,274
They make my mother
Look like rip taylor.
331
00:18:33,213 --> 00:18:36,680
Gentlemen,
If you'll excuse me.
I have to go wake up.
332
00:18:38,318 --> 00:18:40,951
-
( knocking on door )
- excuse me.
333
00:18:43,756 --> 00:18:47,124
- hello, mary.
- well, dick, what a surprise.
334
00:18:47,126 --> 00:18:51,595
I'd invite you in but
There's no one taking
Their clothes off in here.
335
00:18:51,597 --> 00:18:53,798
Of course at this point
Anything would help.
336
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:55,433
Mary, I'm back
337
00:18:55,435 --> 00:18:58,302
And I'm willing to forgive you
For trying to run my life.
338
00:18:58,304 --> 00:19:01,071
- good bye, dick.
- oh, wait, wait, wait!
339
00:19:01,073 --> 00:19:03,073
Mary, what I meant was...
340
00:19:03,075 --> 00:19:06,544
I-- I want to apologize
For reacting so poorly
341
00:19:06,546 --> 00:19:08,646
When you tried
To run my life.
342
00:19:08,648 --> 00:19:12,783
- good bye.
- no, no, no, no, mary,
Please, listen to me.
343
00:19:12,785 --> 00:19:15,152
I'm sorry, I was acting
Like an idiot.
344
00:19:15,154 --> 00:19:16,920
I didn't belong
At that club tonight.
345
00:19:16,922 --> 00:19:21,458
I belong here with you.
Can't I come in?
346
00:19:21,460 --> 00:19:25,129
Dick, it will be a long time
Before I let you back
Into my life,
347
00:19:25,131 --> 00:19:28,932
- much less my house.
- ( mumbles )
348
00:19:28,934 --> 00:19:32,937
- mary, mary, we're about
To play a.P.C.
-
a.P.C.?
349
00:19:32,939 --> 00:19:34,972
Astrophysics charades.
350
00:19:38,210 --> 00:19:39,743
Okay, you've waited
Long enough.
351
00:19:39,745 --> 00:19:43,080
- hi, boys!
- ( all cheer )
352
00:19:46,852 --> 00:19:50,987
Wow, what a roomful
Of weirdos.
353
00:19:56,329 --> 00:19:58,496
So you two together?
354
00:20:01,099 --> 00:20:03,267
Okay, okay, ready.
355
00:20:03,269 --> 00:20:05,469
- uh... Book!
- taxi!
356
00:20:05,471 --> 00:20:07,171
Uh... Journal!
357
00:20:07,173 --> 00:20:08,506
Theory!
358
00:20:10,043 --> 00:20:11,074
24 words.
359
00:20:11,076 --> 00:20:12,843
Woman:
first word.
360
00:20:12,845 --> 00:20:14,979
-
it's a small world.
- harry:
second word.
361
00:20:14,981 --> 00:20:16,614
the first word
or the second word?
362
00:20:16,616 --> 00:20:19,549
Two, the number two.
363
00:20:19,551 --> 00:20:21,318
Man:
oh...
364
00:20:21,320 --> 00:20:23,421
Second word is... Sky.
365
00:20:23,423 --> 00:20:24,888
( voices overlapping )
366
00:20:24,890 --> 00:20:27,024
Oh-oh-oh-oh!
Big giant head.
367
00:20:29,862 --> 00:20:32,730
- ( voices overlapping )
- outer space.
368
00:20:32,732 --> 00:20:35,332
Oh-oh-oh-oh!
Alien, I'm an alien.
369
00:20:35,334 --> 00:20:36,700
No-oo!
370
00:20:36,702 --> 00:20:38,636
You the man.
371
00:20:40,373 --> 00:20:42,506
Uhh... Revolution.
372
00:20:42,508 --> 00:20:43,807
uh... Inertia.
373
00:20:43,809 --> 00:20:46,276
Oh! Oh! "Two celestial
Bodies of equal mass...
374
00:20:46,278 --> 00:20:48,245
Both:
Sharing a single
Gravitational field
375
00:20:48,247 --> 00:20:50,414
Will exhibit identical
Rotational properties
376
00:20:50,416 --> 00:20:53,250
For as long as their
Inertial integrity
Is maintained."
377
00:20:53,252 --> 00:20:55,486
( all cheering )
378
00:20:58,291 --> 00:21:02,292
This-- this is the physics
Blowout of the semester.
379
00:21:02,294 --> 00:21:06,130
- okay, who's up
For quantum pictionary?
- ( all yell )
380
00:21:06,132 --> 00:21:07,798
Men...
381
00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:10,034
Can't live with them...
382
00:21:13,338 --> 00:21:15,272
Good night, mary.
383
00:21:22,147 --> 00:21:23,614
Okay...
384
00:21:23,616 --> 00:21:27,317
Professor plum
Gets into the library
385
00:21:27,319 --> 00:21:28,386
With a pillow.
386
00:21:28,388 --> 00:21:30,287
A pillow?
387
00:21:30,289 --> 00:21:31,855
You can kill someone
With a pillow.
388
00:21:31,857 --> 00:21:33,290
There's no pillow in clue.
389
00:21:33,292 --> 00:21:35,425
That's what makes it
So ingenious.
390
00:21:35,427 --> 00:21:37,795
I've eliminated
The library
391
00:21:37,797 --> 00:21:39,530
And the billiard room
And I'm pretty sure--
392
00:21:39,532 --> 00:21:42,666
Hey, take a look
At this!
393
00:21:42,668 --> 00:21:44,902
What am I doing
Playing board games?
394
00:21:47,707 --> 00:21:50,107
Oh, my...
31723
