All language subtitles for The.Pest.1997.720p.WEBRip.x264-[YTS.LT]-English

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil) Download
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish Download
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:10,500 --> 00:01:13,992 - Papa, I need the bathroom! - Come on, get out! 2 00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:20,669 I like to boogie with my peeps Cruise and Creep 3 00:01:20,744 --> 00:01:23,008 Playing three-Card money on these Crazy streets 4 00:01:23,080 --> 00:01:25,173 Great hustler I'm gonna sCam in a minute 5 00:01:25,249 --> 00:01:27,342 So low to the floor PiCk the poCket on a mid get 6 00:01:27,417 --> 00:01:29,851 SliCk shyster The Pest Meister 7 00:01:29,920 --> 00:01:32,912 Living life in Miami's viCe Ma, see 8 00:01:32,990 --> 00:01:36,084 Nobody messes with the frog, see Where'syour Messiah now 9 00:01:42,599 --> 00:01:47,468 NiCelady, I'm hurting I'm sexy butl'm hurting 10 00:01:47,537 --> 00:01:51,496 Allright, already l'm "ridiCuliCulous" Like a booger, I stiCk to this 11 00:01:52,409 --> 00:01:56,436 Take a whiff of this I'm stinky dinky 12 00:01:56,513 --> 00:01:59,846 Two stinky dinky 13 00:02:02,252 --> 00:02:05,881 Voodoo Mambo Chili Congo 14 00:02:05,956 --> 00:02:08,720 Old sChool beat meets Latin freak and you don't stop 15 00:02:14,564 --> 00:02:18,796 Old sChool beat meets Latin freak You don't quit and you don't stop 16 00:02:18,869 --> 00:02:22,669 Mirror, mirroron the wall who is the sliCkest of them all 17 00:02:22,739 --> 00:02:26,869 It's thes Cheminges tkeenests Cam artist God, it's so hard to be modest! 18 00:02:26,944 --> 00:02:29,378 JaCk may be nimble butl'm a sex symbol 19 00:02:29,446 --> 00:02:31,573 So sliCk Is tole the wiCk from his Candle stiCk 20 00:02:31,648 --> 00:02:35,744 I'm in the mood to sCam simply beCause I Can 21 00:02:35,819 --> 00:02:37,411 I'm the Latin Houdini 22 00:02:37,487 --> 00:02:40,581 Disappear in a flash with your Cash and l'm baCk like agenie 23 00:02:40,657 --> 00:02:44,388 Lucy, I'm home! Don't do that to me, Lucy! 24 00:02:44,461 --> 00:02:46,395 Freak to the east Freak to the west 25 00:02:46,463 --> 00:02:48,693 Freak big booties and big Chest 26 00:02:48,765 --> 00:02:52,826 Yes, y'all, and it's like that! Why, certainly! 27 00:02:52,903 --> 00:02:57,169 Get stupid, get retarded 'Cause Pest'll get the party started 28 00:02:57,240 --> 00:03:00,835 Which way did he go, George? Which way did he go? 29 00:03:01,745 --> 00:03:05,010 - Fun kadoCious, grooviloCiousatroCious - What a maroon! 30 00:03:05,082 --> 00:03:08,176 What a maroon! What a freak! 31 00:03:08,251 --> 00:03:10,048 What a sucker-butt! 32 00:03:10,120 --> 00:03:11,917 I'm the man of a million disguises 33 00:03:11,989 --> 00:03:15,015 I'm as Crazy as they make them or shake them or break them 34 00:03:15,092 --> 00:03:17,856 So sCientific, hate to be speCific E=mC2 35 00:03:17,928 --> 00:03:21,864 Multiply, divide it, slide up inside it blend it, mix it 36 00:03:21,932 --> 00:03:25,197 - Damn, I'm terrific - Pestario! 37 00:03:25,268 --> 00:03:27,463 Did somebody summon me? 38 00:03:27,537 --> 00:03:28,970 Hello, Cleavers. 39 00:03:29,039 --> 00:03:30,631 Hello, June. 40 00:03:30,707 --> 00:03:33,073 Hello, Ward. 41 00:03:33,143 --> 00:03:35,907 Oh, I see Eddie Haskell is here. 42 00:03:37,814 --> 00:03:40,681 I'm so proud. My son, the delivery boy. 43 00:03:40,751 --> 00:03:43,015 Your mom's birthday's coming up. 44 00:03:43,086 --> 00:03:45,145 What are you gonna steal for her this year? 45 00:03:45,222 --> 00:03:48,623 I don't know. I haven't decided yet. Ma, what doyou want? 46 00:03:48,692 --> 00:03:51,456 - Surprise me. - I will! 47 00:03:51,528 --> 00:03:55,897 Pestario, you're just a common hustler. 48 00:03:57,601 --> 00:04:00,832 There is nothing common about the way I dance! 49 00:04:02,606 --> 00:04:04,369 Shall we? 50 00:04:14,785 --> 00:04:16,252 Mom! 51 00:04:16,319 --> 00:04:17,616 Great. 52 00:04:17,687 --> 00:04:20,520 That was nasty. Look at the time. 53 00:04:20,590 --> 00:04:25,084 So long, my family. I must go to work. Love, peace and chicken grease. 54 00:04:32,102 --> 00:04:34,366 Good morning, Pestario. 55 00:04:46,850 --> 00:04:50,308 Mr. Shank, we've been searching for hours. 56 00:04:50,387 --> 00:04:54,790 No one in this neighborhood will fulfill our needs. 57 00:04:54,858 --> 00:04:57,326 Perhaps we should return home? 58 00:04:57,394 --> 00:04:59,157 You're too impatient, Leo. 59 00:04:59,229 --> 00:05:01,891 A good hunter must always remember... 60 00:05:01,965 --> 00:05:06,231 the most challenging prey is often the most difficult to find. 61 00:05:13,477 --> 00:05:17,277 Father Shillelagh. How are your Blarney stones? 62 00:05:19,149 --> 00:05:24,416 I wanted to thank you personally for helping at the church bazaar. 63 00:05:24,488 --> 00:05:27,651 - It was bizarre, wasn't it? - Yes, it was. 64 00:05:27,724 --> 00:05:30,921 You know, your booth made more money than any other. 65 00:05:30,994 --> 00:05:32,962 What can I say? 66 00:05:33,029 --> 00:05:36,897 It was impossible to knock down those milk bottles. 67 00:05:36,967 --> 00:05:40,027 You don't suppose it was divine intervention? 68 00:05:40,103 --> 00:05:42,071 Father, if this is the way you keep secrets... 69 00:05:42,139 --> 00:05:45,802 I'm gonna save my juicy confessions for Father Garcia. 70 00:05:45,876 --> 00:05:49,937 I'll sail away now. Lucky Charms, they're magically delicious! 71 00:05:50,013 --> 00:05:51,947 Bless you, my son. 72 00:05:53,016 --> 00:05:54,278 I think. 73 00:05:54,351 --> 00:05:57,218 Children! Such carefree exuberance. 74 00:05:57,287 --> 00:05:59,687 Such pure innocence at play. 75 00:06:02,259 --> 00:06:04,420 Those little runts. I'll teach 'em. 76 00:06:04,494 --> 00:06:08,658 Hey, moron, we need one more for basketball. 77 00:06:08,732 --> 00:06:11,530 You're with the fat loser-boy. 78 00:06:11,601 --> 00:06:15,935 - Why do they call you fat loser-boy? - I think because I'm fat and never win. 79 00:06:16,006 --> 00:06:19,874 We're gonna change that. The part about never winning. 80 00:06:19,943 --> 00:06:23,140 Bet your lunches. First point wins. 81 00:06:25,882 --> 00:06:29,818 All right, you son of a freak, no fouls, no calls, no outs. Check. 82 00:06:29,886 --> 00:06:31,319 Sucker! 83 00:06:58,048 --> 00:07:03,111 What? It's all your fault! Lf you were a good player, may be we would've won. 84 00:07:03,186 --> 00:07:07,122 We won! We won! Give me your lunches. 85 00:07:07,190 --> 00:07:10,523 That'll teach you a lesson. Get outta here! 86 00:07:12,028 --> 00:07:15,828 Don't worry, they'll never call you a loser again. 87 00:07:15,899 --> 00:07:18,094 Thanks, mister. 88 00:07:18,168 --> 00:07:21,331 Hey, mister, wait a minute. I'm stuck. 89 00:07:27,811 --> 00:07:31,110 - Is that the Mack Daddy pimp? - What's up? 90 00:07:31,181 --> 00:07:34,617 - What's up? - Lunch is on me, freaks. 91 00:07:34,684 --> 00:07:39,678 So where is my super-scam shell game apparatus? 92 00:07:39,756 --> 00:07:42,350 Pest, don't doubt me. We got it. 93 00:07:44,194 --> 00:07:47,891 Excellent, man. This scam is fool proof. 94 00:07:47,964 --> 00:07:51,161 I'm gonna be the King of Corruption. The Duke of Deception. 95 00:07:51,234 --> 00:07:55,830 Whoa. Pest, that's what you say about all your scams. 96 00:07:55,905 --> 00:08:00,865 - What about your bets with the mob? - Yeah. You owe them $50,000. 97 00:08:00,944 --> 00:08:02,878 Are you guys my accountants? 98 00:08:02,946 --> 00:08:07,007 For God's sake, have a little faith in the Pest. A little faith. 99 00:08:07,083 --> 00:08:09,381 I got all my bases covered. I got contingency plans. 100 00:08:09,452 --> 00:08:12,717 Pest. All we're saying is that... 101 00:08:12,789 --> 00:08:15,019 this scamming thing's dangerous. 102 00:08:15,091 --> 00:08:18,891 All right. Lfit will make my bestest of friends feel better... 103 00:08:18,962 --> 00:08:24,400 I'm going to promise I'm never going to scam again as long as I live. 104 00:08:24,467 --> 00:08:26,401 That would be good. 105 00:08:26,469 --> 00:08:29,632 - I'm proud of you. - We can stop getting you out oftrouble. 106 00:08:29,706 --> 00:08:34,871 The key to this scam is to convince people I am blind. 107 00:08:35,612 --> 00:08:37,045 You never learn. 108 00:08:41,117 --> 00:08:44,416 WelCome to the festival of Miami. 109 00:09:07,977 --> 00:09:10,969 These people are all so teeny! 110 00:09:12,615 --> 00:09:15,209 There must be a worthy candidate here. 111 00:09:20,223 --> 00:09:22,987 Pest, look, there's Xantha. 112 00:09:23,059 --> 00:09:24,788 Hey, baby! Hey, baby! 113 00:09:24,861 --> 00:09:26,829 We'll catch up to you later. 114 00:09:28,031 --> 00:09:30,829 Hey, baby. How's my Nubian bucket of love? 115 00:09:30,900 --> 00:09:33,164 My ebony delight, my Africanicus romanticus. 116 00:09:33,236 --> 00:09:35,898 Where was your sorry Latin buttocks last night? 117 00:09:35,972 --> 00:09:38,167 Baby, easy with the nagging. 118 00:09:38,241 --> 00:09:40,766 You missed dinner with my parents! 119 00:09:40,844 --> 00:09:44,905 Yeah! You missed dinner with her parents last night, loser! 120 00:09:46,116 --> 00:09:48,914 Do you mind if l talk to my girlfriend alone? 121 00:09:48,985 --> 00:09:51,510 Anything you have to say to me, you can say in front of Malaria. 122 00:09:51,588 --> 00:09:53,852 - Anything? - Anything! 123 00:09:53,923 --> 00:09:57,017 Fine. Malaria's got mossy teeth and a fat butt! 124 00:09:57,861 --> 00:10:00,159 These jeans make me look fat. 125 00:10:00,230 --> 00:10:03,825 No, Malaria. Your fat butt makes you look fat. 126 00:10:03,900 --> 00:10:05,834 Baby, I'm sorry. 127 00:10:05,902 --> 00:10:08,700 There's nothing more I want to do than be with my girlfriend's parents. 128 00:10:08,772 --> 00:10:12,105 Let's reschedule a site for tomorrow. Huh, curly locks? 129 00:10:12,175 --> 00:10:14,439 - Can't. - Why? 130 00:10:20,417 --> 00:10:23,784 Baby, what a dufus! What a freak! I totally forgot... 131 00:10:23,853 --> 00:10:25,514 Forget it. I'm outta here. 132 00:10:25,588 --> 00:10:28,284 Xantha-poo, come on, baby. 133 00:10:28,358 --> 00:10:30,326 I'll skip my previous commitment. 134 00:10:30,393 --> 00:10:32,861 Really? You'll come to dinner? 135 00:10:32,929 --> 00:10:36,729 Abso freaking lutely. I'll make your parents love me and ask me to marry you. 136 00:10:36,800 --> 00:10:39,030 - How? - I'll tell 'em you're pregnant. 137 00:10:39,102 --> 00:10:41,161 - What? - He'll tell 'em you're pregnant. 138 00:10:41,237 --> 00:10:43,933 Pest-man, we gotta go. Sorry. 139 00:10:44,007 --> 00:10:45,941 Love, peace and chicken grease. 140 00:10:46,009 --> 00:10:47,442 Bye, honey. 141 00:10:47,510 --> 00:10:50,138 You're pregnant? 142 00:10:59,989 --> 00:11:01,616 Step right up. 143 00:11:01,691 --> 00:11:05,058 Money is flying out of my pocket. Play the coconut shell game. 144 00:11:05,128 --> 00:11:07,062 There's a winner born every minute. 145 00:11:07,130 --> 00:11:10,361 I got $20 that says I can find that ball. 146 00:11:10,433 --> 00:11:12,560 Okay, people, we've got a taker. 147 00:11:12,635 --> 00:11:17,538 Cross my hand, I fool the rich man, poor man, but not the policeman. 148 00:11:17,607 --> 00:11:23,011 Which shell is it under? You must tell me because I'm blind. 149 00:11:23,847 --> 00:11:27,214 Soccer boy, come here. Yeah, you. 150 00:11:27,283 --> 00:11:29,513 - Oh, there you are. - How'd you catch that ball? 151 00:11:29,586 --> 00:11:32,919 Telepathy. You lose one sense, you gain another. 152 00:11:32,989 --> 00:11:36,220 - How'd you know I was male? - I could hear your gonads shaking. 153 00:11:36,292 --> 00:11:38,920 You should wear more support, shorty. 154 00:11:42,599 --> 00:11:45,727 Maybe, maybe. Yeah, that's more like it. 155 00:11:47,203 --> 00:11:49,603 That is the specimen I want. 156 00:11:49,672 --> 00:11:53,369 Find out about him, and I'll make the necessary preparations. 157 00:11:53,443 --> 00:11:55,172 Yes, Mr. Shank. 158 00:11:58,648 --> 00:12:00,616 Oh! What a pathetic choice. 159 00:12:02,385 --> 00:12:04,853 Which shell is it under? 160 00:12:04,921 --> 00:12:07,287 Sorry, sucker, you lose. 161 00:12:07,357 --> 00:12:09,154 No, you lose, brah! 162 00:12:09,225 --> 00:12:11,420 Did I hear something fall? 163 00:12:11,494 --> 00:12:13,052 Knock, knock. Who's there? 164 00:12:13,129 --> 00:12:15,290 We work for Angus. Are you Pest Vargas? 165 00:12:15,365 --> 00:12:17,299 Are you the doctor? 166 00:12:17,367 --> 00:12:20,131 Oh, my, Grandma, what large pores you have. 167 00:12:20,203 --> 00:12:22,433 Definitely not a plastic surgeon. 168 00:12:22,505 --> 00:12:25,167 Oh, my God, you're hideous. Repulsive, even! 169 00:12:25,241 --> 00:12:27,903 You have a lump! You poor mis shapen creature! 170 00:12:27,977 --> 00:12:30,537 We can profit from your misfortune. 171 00:12:30,613 --> 00:12:34,447 For $1, take a picture with Elephant Man in a kilt! 172 00:12:34,517 --> 00:12:35,779 Get him! 173 00:12:37,520 --> 00:12:39,317 Do something! You know karate! 174 00:12:43,192 --> 00:12:45,126 Angus wants his money. 175 00:12:45,194 --> 00:12:47,492 You wouldn't hit a blind man, would you? 176 00:12:48,398 --> 00:12:51,492 How do you feel about asthmatics? I can't breathe! 177 00:12:52,669 --> 00:12:55,604 Emotionally-challenged people? 178 00:12:58,474 --> 00:13:01,671 What about epileptics? Hold my tongue! 179 00:13:02,745 --> 00:13:05,737 - Get 'em! - You guys are in trouble now. 180 00:13:05,815 --> 00:13:08,943 - Chubby and I will take care of them! - Chubby and I? 181 00:13:09,919 --> 00:13:13,047 Let's air our differences, fellas. 182 00:13:44,053 --> 00:13:46,647 My favorite delivery boy. 183 00:13:46,723 --> 00:13:48,657 What happened to you? You late! 184 00:13:54,163 --> 00:13:56,290 Me love you long time. 185 00:13:56,366 --> 00:13:59,494 Wait. Why I don't understand any of your Chinese? 186 00:14:00,703 --> 00:14:04,230 I from south. Different dialect. Right? Everybody know that. 187 00:14:04,307 --> 00:14:07,208 So am I. I am from south, too. 188 00:14:07,276 --> 00:14:10,370 But I from far, far, far south! 189 00:14:10,446 --> 00:14:12,380 Eat some grits, y'all. 190 00:14:12,448 --> 00:14:14,382 Wherever you come from, you late for last time. 191 00:14:14,450 --> 00:14:19,114 You don't look Chinese. You look like Moe from Three Stooges. You're fired. 192 00:14:19,188 --> 00:14:24,125 Please, give me another chance! I'll never do it again, I promise. 193 00:14:24,193 --> 00:14:27,526 You don't know the troubles I've seen! My grandmother's sick. 194 00:14:27,597 --> 00:14:30,225 I've got a good excuse this time. Listen. 195 00:14:30,299 --> 00:14:33,200 I was taking a walk with my pet dog... 196 00:14:33,269 --> 00:14:35,533 Duck. My duck! 197 00:14:35,605 --> 00:14:37,903 When he ranned off on me, I was about to... 198 00:14:37,974 --> 00:14:40,636 Oh, my God! 199 00:14:40,710 --> 00:14:44,942 Quacky! Quacky! What have they did to you? 200 00:14:45,014 --> 00:14:48,472 - Which one is he? - I don't know. 201 00:14:48,551 --> 00:14:51,714 They all look the same! 202 00:14:54,157 --> 00:14:57,558 I'll have to call my lawyer and tell him I can't find Quacky. 203 00:14:57,627 --> 00:14:59,060 Lawyer? 204 00:15:01,564 --> 00:15:04,055 This must be Quacky, with that sweet little smile. 205 00:15:04,133 --> 00:15:05,566 Gimme that! 206 00:15:05,635 --> 00:15:09,765 Poor little Quacky. Don't worry. I'll bury you in France likeyou wanted. 207 00:15:09,839 --> 00:15:13,172 - You kill Quacky? - No! L, I might have. 208 00:15:13,242 --> 00:15:16,643 - Why? - I'm sorry. 209 00:15:16,713 --> 00:15:19,238 I loved little Quacky. 210 00:15:19,315 --> 00:15:21,146 - Mr. Cheung? - Yes? 211 00:15:21,217 --> 00:15:23,185 - Can I talk toyou? - Yes. 212 00:15:23,252 --> 00:15:26,483 Can I talk toyou over here? Over here? 213 00:15:26,556 --> 00:15:29,081 - Over here? - Okay. 214 00:15:29,158 --> 00:15:32,150 - Can I use your phone? - You're not calling your lawyer? 215 00:15:32,228 --> 00:15:33,661 Not yet. 216 00:15:33,730 --> 00:15:37,131 First I have to call my family and tell them about... 217 00:15:37,200 --> 00:15:39,395 About Quacky. 218 00:15:39,469 --> 00:15:41,664 Yes, ofcourse, ofcourse. 219 00:15:41,738 --> 00:15:45,003 Don't worry. Anything you need, just let me know. 220 00:15:45,074 --> 00:15:48,043 - Okay, there is one thing. - Yes? 221 00:15:48,111 --> 00:15:51,638 Quacky always wanted to be served extra-crispy. 222 00:15:51,714 --> 00:15:53,648 - Could you do that? - No problem. 223 00:15:53,716 --> 00:15:57,345 No MSG? An extra order of rice? Thank you. 224 00:15:57,420 --> 00:16:01,117 You're very welcome. Don't worry. I take care of you. 225 00:16:01,190 --> 00:16:03,351 You're wonderful. Really. 226 00:16:14,871 --> 00:16:16,702 Hello. 227 00:16:16,773 --> 00:16:18,468 Angusie? 228 00:16:19,809 --> 00:16:23,108 You rapscallion! You naughty man, you! 229 00:16:23,179 --> 00:16:27,707 I'm hurted you sent ruffians after me. I was gonna surprise you with a check! 230 00:16:27,784 --> 00:16:30,082 Listen. You've owed $50,000 for three weeks! 231 00:16:30,153 --> 00:16:33,554 You'd show more respect if we were the Italian mob. 232 00:16:33,623 --> 00:16:35,386 Don't start again. 233 00:16:35,458 --> 00:16:38,052 People don't take us seriously because we're Scottish. 234 00:16:39,228 --> 00:16:42,720 People will take us seriously when they see what we do to you. 235 00:16:42,799 --> 00:16:46,530 Angusie, home in sky! All I need is time. 236 00:16:46,602 --> 00:16:48,194 What is today? 237 00:16:48,271 --> 00:16:50,671 The first day of the rest of our lives? 238 00:16:51,674 --> 00:16:53,403 Sean Connery's birthday? 239 00:16:53,476 --> 00:16:55,535 Sean Connery's birthday? 240 00:17:07,523 --> 00:17:09,650 Listen. Today is Monday. 241 00:17:09,725 --> 00:17:13,092 I want the money Wednesday or I'll kill your family. 242 00:17:13,162 --> 00:17:15,790 How 'bout Thursday, and you just take outa Cousin? 243 00:17:15,865 --> 00:17:18,891 Oh, bad connection. 244 00:17:18,968 --> 00:17:22,199 I bring you the cash... I can't... 245 00:17:22,271 --> 00:17:23,602 Whatever. 246 00:17:24,707 --> 00:17:28,768 Extra-crispy. Just like you wanted. 247 00:17:28,845 --> 00:17:31,143 My poor Quacky. 248 00:17:33,382 --> 00:17:36,044 Poor Quacky. Can I get extra plum sauce? 249 00:17:36,118 --> 00:17:40,077 You have no time. You have delivery to do! Go! Hurry! 250 00:17:40,156 --> 00:17:41,885 Plum sauce! 251 00:17:54,437 --> 00:17:56,462 Soon I shall return... 252 00:17:56,539 --> 00:17:59,474 to the glorious dank splendor of the homeland... 253 00:17:59,542 --> 00:18:03,535 and be away from all this nauseating pastel. 254 00:18:03,613 --> 00:18:05,979 Excuse me. 255 00:18:06,048 --> 00:18:08,278 Your Chinese food has arrived. 256 00:18:08,351 --> 00:18:10,285 Yummy! Where? 257 00:18:13,356 --> 00:18:15,449 Got it, got it, got it! 258 00:18:15,524 --> 00:18:17,458 What is that? 259 00:18:17,526 --> 00:18:20,859 That's the one you requested. The blind Latino. 260 00:18:20,930 --> 00:18:24,889 I most certainly did not! I wanted the athletic Latino! 261 00:18:24,967 --> 00:18:28,835 - But you pointed at him. - Why would I pick a blind man? 262 00:18:28,905 --> 00:18:33,808 Sir, he's not really blind. He's a scam artist. 263 00:18:33,876 --> 00:18:36,037 A very fast and agile one. 264 00:18:37,346 --> 00:18:41,806 Mr. Vargas here runs numbers out of his Chinese restaurant, but unfortunately... 265 00:18:41,884 --> 00:18:44,284 some of his own bets turned sour. 266 00:18:44,353 --> 00:18:47,686 - How sour? - He owes the Scottish mob $50,000. 267 00:18:47,757 --> 00:18:50,851 I didn't know there was a Scottish mob! 268 00:18:50,927 --> 00:18:53,361 lf he doesn't pay in two days, they'll kill him. 269 00:19:11,314 --> 00:19:13,976 - Hello! - Hi! 270 00:19:14,050 --> 00:19:18,009 Just doing our MSG test. Everything seems to pass inspection. 271 00:19:18,087 --> 00:19:20,146 That's $52.23 for the food... 272 00:19:20,222 --> 00:19:24,056 $100 delivery charge 'cause we don't normally come out here. 273 00:19:24,126 --> 00:19:26,993 Why is that? You afraid of white people? 274 00:19:28,297 --> 00:19:32,233 'Cause you all carry diseases my people don't have immunities for. 275 00:19:32,301 --> 00:19:35,168 Perhaps you're just being paranoid. 276 00:19:35,237 --> 00:19:37,171 Could you back off? 277 00:19:37,239 --> 00:19:41,073 You spit when you talk. I'm susceptible to air borne syphilises. 278 00:19:41,143 --> 00:19:43,270 " Pest." Is that your name... 279 00:19:43,346 --> 00:19:45,678 or a personality trait? 280 00:19:45,748 --> 00:19:48,376 My real name is Pestario Rivera Garcia Espinoza... 281 00:19:48,451 --> 00:19:51,545 Juan Marcos Neruda Salsa Picante Vargas. 282 00:19:51,620 --> 00:19:55,249 But you can call me Pestario. Pest, for shorter. 283 00:19:55,324 --> 00:19:56,757 Now we're even. 284 00:19:57,827 --> 00:20:01,422 What is a Latin boy doing delivering Chinese food? 285 00:20:01,497 --> 00:20:03,089 Chinese food? 286 00:20:04,967 --> 00:20:07,026 Oh, my God! 287 00:20:07,103 --> 00:20:09,731 The MSG, the chopsticks, the disappearing dogs! 288 00:20:09,805 --> 00:20:13,400 Now it all makes sense. And I thought they were eccentric Mexicans. 289 00:20:13,476 --> 00:20:16,741 What a fool! What a sucker-butt! 290 00:20:16,812 --> 00:20:20,908 Oh, a hot wench! Yeah, baby! 291 00:20:20,983 --> 00:20:22,575 My wife! 292 00:20:22,651 --> 00:20:24,551 Oops! I'm bad. 293 00:20:24,620 --> 00:20:25,882 Sorry. 294 00:20:25,955 --> 00:20:29,948 - I saw you earlier today on the street. - You did? 295 00:20:30,026 --> 00:20:34,759 You probably didn't see me because you were blind at the time. 296 00:20:34,830 --> 00:20:38,926 So you unearthed my horrible secret. 297 00:20:39,001 --> 00:20:40,935 I am blind! I am! 298 00:20:41,003 --> 00:20:43,028 I am blind! 299 00:20:44,140 --> 00:20:46,631 I've been blind to other people's faults. 300 00:20:46,709 --> 00:20:50,167 Please don't tell! I was going to become dumpling boy next week. 301 00:20:50,246 --> 00:20:54,307 Why isn't a smart boy like you... 302 00:20:54,383 --> 00:20:55,850 in college? 303 00:20:55,918 --> 00:20:57,943 It's painful to discuss. 304 00:20:58,020 --> 00:21:00,614 I hit puberty in the first grade, and there's only so many times... 305 00:21:00,689 --> 00:21:05,149 a seven-year-old can be called "fire hose" before he cracks. 306 00:21:06,228 --> 00:21:10,756 That's really too bad because my family provides... 307 00:21:10,833 --> 00:21:15,236 a $50,000 cash scholarship... 308 00:21:15,304 --> 00:21:17,272 to minority students, and I thought... 309 00:21:17,339 --> 00:21:19,273 - $50,000? - Yeah. 310 00:21:19,341 --> 00:21:21,832 - $50,000? - Yup, that's it. 311 00:21:21,911 --> 00:21:24,641 Look at that. Will you touch it? 312 00:21:24,713 --> 00:21:28,012 The fire hose is gone! It's a miracle. 313 00:21:28,084 --> 00:21:31,850 Hallelujah! Praise the Lord! I want to learn! I want to go to school! 314 00:21:31,921 --> 00:21:33,411 - You do? - Yes. 315 00:21:33,489 --> 00:21:36,481 Good! I'm so glad you're so eager! 316 00:21:36,559 --> 00:21:38,925 Let us celebrate, all right? 317 00:21:38,994 --> 00:21:40,655 Here. 318 00:21:40,729 --> 00:21:46,224 Ofcourse I have to administer a few small tests before you qualify. 319 00:21:46,302 --> 00:21:47,894 Tests? 320 00:21:50,406 --> 00:21:53,204 Hey, can I get one of these tables for my dorm room? 321 00:21:53,275 --> 00:21:56,836 Turn it up! This is fun. Come on. 322 00:21:56,912 --> 00:21:58,470 All right... 323 00:21:58,547 --> 00:22:00,845 crank it up. 324 00:22:03,352 --> 00:22:04,785 Yeah! 325 00:22:09,925 --> 00:22:11,893 Wait a minute. 326 00:22:11,961 --> 00:22:13,895 I don't feel so well. 327 00:22:13,963 --> 00:22:15,055 I feel... 328 00:22:20,402 --> 00:22:25,806 You will do as many repetitions as you can manage in one minute. Go! 329 00:22:28,310 --> 00:22:29,743 One. 330 00:22:29,812 --> 00:22:31,074 Ready? 331 00:22:36,685 --> 00:22:38,550 I wasn't ready. Try again. 332 00:22:42,024 --> 00:22:44,015 Try one more time. 333 00:22:57,206 --> 00:22:59,970 He's the worst candidate we have ever had. 334 00:23:02,711 --> 00:23:06,374 I will show you the shot that won me the reform school championship... 335 00:23:06,448 --> 00:23:08,916 and the tag "8-Ball Kid." 336 00:23:12,888 --> 00:23:16,085 I'm sorry. I'm awful sorry. 337 00:23:16,158 --> 00:23:19,821 But I know you don't care because you Germans are the greatest! 338 00:23:19,895 --> 00:23:22,762 Next time somebody says Germans are humorless people... 339 00:23:22,831 --> 00:23:25,629 I'm gonna tell them to come to this house. 340 00:23:25,701 --> 00:23:27,191 I must tell you... 341 00:23:27,269 --> 00:23:29,829 So you started a few wars, all right? 342 00:23:29,905 --> 00:23:33,238 Actually, you started every war. It's not like you ever won one! 343 00:23:35,277 --> 00:23:37,245 We kicked France's ass. 344 00:23:37,313 --> 00:23:39,873 Please! Who doesn't, right? 345 00:23:39,949 --> 00:23:42,110 Your scores were so abysmal that... 346 00:23:42,184 --> 00:23:45,153 And your women! So you dig fat chicks. 347 00:23:45,221 --> 00:23:47,746 What do the rest of us care? We don't have to touch them. 348 00:23:47,823 --> 00:23:52,624 It's like riding a moped. It's fun till your friends catch you doing it. 349 00:23:52,695 --> 00:23:54,128 You failed! 350 00:23:54,196 --> 00:23:56,926 You lost the scholarship. You can't go. 351 00:23:56,999 --> 00:23:58,990 Stop repeating what I'm saying. 352 00:23:59,068 --> 00:24:00,831 I mean it! 353 00:24:03,539 --> 00:24:05,473 All right, okay! 354 00:24:05,541 --> 00:24:09,910 You're the ideal candidate for the scholarship. 355 00:24:16,185 --> 00:24:19,552 I am? I am? Oh, snap! Oh, joy! 356 00:24:19,622 --> 00:24:22,216 Get stupid. Get ooh-eh! Get eh-eh. 357 00:24:26,161 --> 00:24:29,927 I can't think of any thing I would rather do before returning to the homeland... 358 00:24:29,999 --> 00:24:32,832 than ridding the earth of this creature! 359 00:24:35,104 --> 00:24:37,504 Go get the contract. 360 00:24:40,576 --> 00:24:43,477 Time to sign the contract. 361 00:24:43,545 --> 00:24:46,912 Sign there on the dotted line. Here. 362 00:24:50,753 --> 00:24:53,881 I took a legal correspondence course and I'm only two credits away. 363 00:24:53,956 --> 00:24:57,323 What's all this stuff about maiming and death? 364 00:24:57,393 --> 00:24:58,985 Legal mumbojumbo. 365 00:24:59,061 --> 00:25:00,460 All right. 366 00:25:00,529 --> 00:25:01,962 Just sign. 367 00:25:02,965 --> 00:25:06,992 What's this about "I waive my legal rights" and what not? 368 00:25:07,069 --> 00:25:11,096 Some kid sued us last year over a stubbed toe, so we had to add it. 369 00:25:11,173 --> 00:25:13,403 - Just sign. - All right. 370 00:25:14,410 --> 00:25:15,934 What's this about... 371 00:25:16,011 --> 00:25:19,845 - So you don't want the $50,000. - I do want it! 372 00:25:19,915 --> 00:25:22,008 - College is a big commitment. - I'll be committed. 373 00:25:22,084 --> 00:25:25,019 - We'll give it to someone else. - Give it to me. 374 00:25:25,087 --> 00:25:26,748 - I want it! - Forget it! 375 00:25:26,822 --> 00:25:28,847 Perhaps a toast? 376 00:25:34,363 --> 00:25:36,126 I'm in like sin. 377 00:25:37,199 --> 00:25:40,225 Now, we have a little tradition. 378 00:25:40,302 --> 00:25:45,262 All the winners join me for a little gentlemanly hunt on my private island. 379 00:25:45,341 --> 00:25:46,706 Goody. What'll we hunt? 380 00:25:46,775 --> 00:25:48,936 - Deer. - Goose. 381 00:25:49,011 --> 00:25:50,842 - Goose. - Deer. 382 00:25:50,913 --> 00:25:51,811 Deer goose. 383 00:25:51,880 --> 00:25:53,472 Ja. Deer goose. 384 00:25:53,549 --> 00:25:55,779 We hunt a deer goose. It's... 385 00:25:55,851 --> 00:25:58,217 - Indigenous. - Indigenous to my island. 386 00:25:58,954 --> 00:26:00,387 To the hunt! 387 00:26:06,562 --> 00:26:08,154 Sorry. 388 00:26:09,531 --> 00:26:10,964 Hurry up! 389 00:26:11,033 --> 00:26:13,593 I can't wait to bag me a deer goose! 390 00:26:13,669 --> 00:26:18,368 I hear the meat's a delicacy. No body fricassees like I fricassee. 391 00:26:20,743 --> 00:26:24,907 - I'm going to kill him now! - Remember, the joy of the hunt. 392 00:26:24,980 --> 00:26:28,177 - Can I fly it? - No, sit down and be quiet. 393 00:26:28,250 --> 00:26:30,184 You can't talk to me like that. 394 00:26:30,252 --> 00:26:32,743 You gotta keep the concentration for the pilot. 395 00:26:32,821 --> 00:26:34,755 He's the pilot? 396 00:26:48,871 --> 00:26:51,339 23,099 bottles of beer on the wall 397 00:26:51,407 --> 00:26:55,241 23,099 bottles of beer on the wall Take one down, pass it around... 398 00:26:55,310 --> 00:26:57,972 - There's the island. - We made it! 399 00:26:58,046 --> 00:27:00,378 At last! We're there! 400 00:27:01,450 --> 00:27:03,418 So you'll let me fly? Come on! 401 00:27:03,485 --> 00:27:07,012 There's so many buttons. How do you know which one's the one? 402 00:27:09,458 --> 00:27:12,120 You Can Change for the hunt in the study. 403 00:27:12,194 --> 00:27:13,821 Thank you. 404 00:27:13,896 --> 00:27:16,456 Try not to break any thing. 405 00:27:18,233 --> 00:27:20,997 "The United States of Germany." 406 00:27:21,069 --> 00:27:23,037 Somebody's a sore loser. 407 00:27:28,210 --> 00:27:30,701 Books! I love to read. 408 00:27:32,948 --> 00:27:36,645 "The Rise and Fall of The Third Reich." 409 00:27:36,718 --> 00:27:38,686 " Mein Kampf." 410 00:27:38,754 --> 00:27:40,949 "Sex Be Nimble, Sex Be Quick." 411 00:27:52,134 --> 00:27:54,261 You speak German? 412 00:28:00,108 --> 00:28:02,099 You're the new scholarship student. 413 00:28:02,177 --> 00:28:07,410 - I'm here for the hunt, then to Harvard. - You really believe that? 414 00:28:07,483 --> 00:28:09,974 I would settle for Yale, but... 415 00:28:10,052 --> 00:28:12,247 I love Boston in the spring. 416 00:28:12,321 --> 00:28:15,722 Rowing on the Charles. Gathering leaves in the quad. 417 00:28:15,791 --> 00:28:17,224 The color wars. 418 00:28:17,292 --> 00:28:19,726 Norman, is that you? 419 00:28:19,795 --> 00:28:22,628 My father tells you you're going to college and you believe him? 420 00:28:22,698 --> 00:28:25,792 Oh, snap. You're Shank Junior, huh? 421 00:28:26,969 --> 00:28:29,028 My name is Himmel. 422 00:28:30,706 --> 00:28:32,640 I mean, hi, Himmel. 423 00:28:32,708 --> 00:28:35,472 Your father seems like a great guy for a disturbed individual. 424 00:28:35,544 --> 00:28:37,535 No offense. But I trust him. 425 00:28:37,613 --> 00:28:41,276 What makes you think he'd tell you the truth when I am his own son... 426 00:28:41,350 --> 00:28:43,875 and he's been lying to me his entire life? 427 00:28:46,522 --> 00:28:50,959 Well, it seems like the two of you have issues to work out. 428 00:28:51,026 --> 00:28:52,960 I'm going to go outside. 429 00:28:53,028 --> 00:28:56,327 Do you know what he did to me when I was a child? 430 00:28:56,398 --> 00:28:59,060 No, but why don't we get Leo and tell him? 431 00:28:59,134 --> 00:29:01,625 He locked me in a room with a boa constrictor... 432 00:29:01,703 --> 00:29:04,297 and told me I couldn't get out until I killed it. 433 00:29:07,543 --> 00:29:12,207 The important thing is that you got out and you're fine. You know? 434 00:29:12,281 --> 00:29:15,444 He kept me in that room for six weeks! 435 00:29:15,517 --> 00:29:17,985 But look at the wonderful complexion you have. 436 00:29:18,053 --> 00:29:21,022 Don't be afraid. I loved that snake. 437 00:29:21,089 --> 00:29:23,023 You share too much. 438 00:29:26,061 --> 00:29:27,085 Help. 439 00:29:33,869 --> 00:29:38,169 So tell me, what was your snake's name? 440 00:29:38,240 --> 00:29:39,639 Cocteau. 441 00:29:39,708 --> 00:29:41,539 Cocteau? 442 00:29:41,610 --> 00:29:43,305 Like the French playwright? 443 00:29:44,413 --> 00:29:46,540 After my two favorite body parts. 444 00:29:53,422 --> 00:29:55,014 Red light, green light! 445 00:29:56,258 --> 00:29:57,953 Red light, green light! 446 00:30:01,363 --> 00:30:03,490 You're it. 447 00:30:04,733 --> 00:30:06,291 Gustav! 448 00:30:07,369 --> 00:30:10,532 Now we are locked in together, like me and the snake. 449 00:30:10,606 --> 00:30:13,404 Oh, great! Just great. 450 00:30:13,475 --> 00:30:15,443 Look, cute boy. 451 00:30:15,510 --> 00:30:19,139 - You seem like a reasonable type. - Don't flatter me! 452 00:30:19,214 --> 00:30:23,207 You have a big nose, your feet stink and your mother dresses you funny. 453 00:30:24,886 --> 00:30:26,854 There is no scholarship. 454 00:30:26,922 --> 00:30:29,982 You are only here because my father wants to hunt you. 455 00:30:30,058 --> 00:30:32,549 My God, you'll say anything, won't you? 456 00:30:32,628 --> 00:30:35,188 Now, how do you sound your father wants to hunt me? 457 00:30:35,263 --> 00:30:39,859 Why would he give me this fancy hunting out fit if he wanted to hunt me? 458 00:30:39,935 --> 00:30:42,529 - Explain yourself. - I can protect you. 459 00:30:43,672 --> 00:30:45,105 Don't go! 460 00:30:52,314 --> 00:30:54,179 Oh, you play! 461 00:30:55,350 --> 00:30:56,351 Listen, I just met your crazy son. 462 00:30:56,351 --> 00:30:58,012 Listen, I just met your crazy son. 463 00:30:58,086 --> 00:30:59,781 No offense. 464 00:30:59,855 --> 00:31:05,691 He made up the wackest story about you wanting to hunt me. You believe that? 465 00:31:06,828 --> 00:31:08,853 Ridiculous, isn't it? 466 00:31:08,930 --> 00:31:13,128 Can you imagine the demons that kid's working out? You hunting people? 467 00:31:14,369 --> 00:31:17,964 My God. It would almost be funny if it wasn't so... 468 00:31:19,875 --> 00:31:21,809 lfit wasn't so... 469 00:31:47,602 --> 00:31:50,969 This is the most disgusting thing... 470 00:31:51,039 --> 00:31:53,507 I have ever seen. 471 00:31:53,575 --> 00:31:56,305 Those heads haven't been dusted in months! 472 00:31:57,412 --> 00:32:00,779 I'm going to get a wet rag and I'll be right back. Bye. 473 00:32:05,353 --> 00:32:08,686 I don't wanna die! I'm too young! 474 00:32:12,494 --> 00:32:15,122 Get off me, you freak! 475 00:32:15,197 --> 00:32:17,358 Want a piece of me? Get a piece of me. 476 00:32:20,569 --> 00:32:22,036 My springbok pelt! 477 00:32:22,104 --> 00:32:24,971 I'm sorry. I couldn't make it to the newspaper. 478 00:32:26,775 --> 00:32:30,836 - I bagged this on my ninth birthday. - He was a prodigy. 479 00:32:30,912 --> 00:32:35,406 By the time I was 30, I had hunted nearly every animal there was. 480 00:32:35,484 --> 00:32:39,386 Yeah? You won't be so when I report you to the ASPCA! 481 00:32:39,454 --> 00:32:41,388 - I was bored. - Bored, sir? 482 00:32:41,456 --> 00:32:45,688 All right, so I was depressed! I needed a challenge. 483 00:32:45,761 --> 00:32:49,788 Have you tried Parcheesi? It's a game of skill and chance. 484 00:32:49,865 --> 00:32:54,495 Here on this island, I've hunted every ethnicity of human except one. 485 00:32:54,569 --> 00:32:57,970 My God! Haven't the Jewish people suffered enough? 486 00:32:58,039 --> 00:32:59,631 You are Puerto Rican? 487 00:32:59,708 --> 00:33:03,337 What, me? Oh, no. 488 00:33:09,918 --> 00:33:11,647 I am French! 489 00:33:22,964 --> 00:33:28,027 Look at me. I'm brooding, yet craving rich sauces. 490 00:33:28,103 --> 00:33:30,594 You are next, Mr. Vargas. 491 00:33:32,140 --> 00:33:34,199 But I break out when I'm shell acked. 492 00:33:34,276 --> 00:33:36,870 What's more embarrassing than a zitty head on the wall? 493 00:33:36,945 --> 00:33:38,344 Besides... 494 00:33:38,413 --> 00:33:42,747 I'll make a nasty face, and I'll destroy your display. 495 00:33:44,853 --> 00:33:49,586 lf you survive for 24 hours, you get your $50,000. 496 00:33:50,659 --> 00:33:52,456 $50,000? 497 00:33:52,527 --> 00:33:54,791 My God! Why didn't you say so? 498 00:33:54,863 --> 00:33:57,195 Hunt away, great white hunter! 499 00:33:57,265 --> 00:33:59,062 Hunt... 500 00:33:59,134 --> 00:34:00,795 Hunt away. 501 00:34:00,869 --> 00:34:03,736 And if you don't, it's the shelf. 502 00:34:11,313 --> 00:34:14,646 Father, I don't want to participate in this. It's wrong. 503 00:34:14,716 --> 00:34:16,775 You have to learn sometime. 504 00:34:16,852 --> 00:34:20,515 Why would I ever have to learn how to hunt people? 505 00:34:20,589 --> 00:34:23,251 The hunt is just a metaphor... 506 00:34:23,325 --> 00:34:28,319 for the glorious cycle of endless life and rebirth. 507 00:34:28,396 --> 00:34:33,095 And remember, always, always shoot him in the brain. 508 00:34:33,168 --> 00:34:35,102 - I hate you. - Shut up. 509 00:34:35,170 --> 00:34:37,730 I'm getting more tea. 510 00:34:37,806 --> 00:34:42,766 Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me, but... 511 00:34:44,079 --> 00:34:46,411 Why do I look like I'm from the "Jungle Book"... 512 00:34:46,481 --> 00:34:49,348 and you get the nice Banana Republic stuff? 513 00:34:49,417 --> 00:34:51,351 Does that seem fair to you? 514 00:34:51,419 --> 00:34:55,583 I thought you'd like it. It's the costume of your ancestors. 515 00:34:55,657 --> 00:34:59,184 - Mywhat? - I think it adds a the atrical element. 516 00:34:59,261 --> 00:35:01,559 Stay out of this. 517 00:35:01,630 --> 00:35:06,033 I want some boots, some khakis, some turtlenecks and some... 518 00:35:07,269 --> 00:35:10,102 You have guns. That's not fair. 519 00:35:10,171 --> 00:35:14,540 I'm not going to play till I get something. I can't hear you. 520 00:35:17,812 --> 00:35:19,473 - This is it? - Yeah! 521 00:35:19,547 --> 00:35:22,448 - This is it? - All yours! 522 00:35:22,517 --> 00:35:26,977 Oh, well, well. Why don't we just get a candlestick and play Clue? 523 00:35:27,055 --> 00:35:29,114 I'll be Colonel Mustard. You be Mrs. Peacock. 524 00:35:29,190 --> 00:35:33,684 First we start with a traditional toast. 525 00:35:35,130 --> 00:35:37,530 To you, Mr. Vargas. Good luck. 526 00:35:37,599 --> 00:35:39,396 Good luck to you, too. 527 00:35:39,467 --> 00:35:42,163 Actually, I take that back. I hope you don't do well. 528 00:35:42,237 --> 00:35:45,866 I hope you get violated by pig-monkey men in the woods. 529 00:35:53,815 --> 00:35:58,252 All right, I've got the upper hand. What's to keep me from shooting you now? 530 00:36:02,924 --> 00:36:04,721 Other than that. 531 00:36:05,894 --> 00:36:07,828 What are you doing? 532 00:36:12,100 --> 00:36:15,263 Your 24 hours have begun. Go. 533 00:36:15,337 --> 00:36:17,828 - I have one thing to add. - What? 534 00:36:17,906 --> 00:36:22,400 I lied on the form. I'm not the perfect specimen I appear to be. 535 00:36:22,477 --> 00:36:28,006 I have the public school gypsy curse. Stuttering dyslexia. 536 00:36:28,083 --> 00:36:30,278 I b-bead r-rackwards. 537 00:36:30,352 --> 00:36:32,843 I g-get mords wixed up. 538 00:36:32,921 --> 00:36:35,116 I'm narcoleptic. 539 00:36:38,093 --> 00:36:40,687 And you are? See? See? 540 00:36:40,762 --> 00:36:42,696 I have Tourette's! 541 00:36:42,764 --> 00:36:46,222 Yes, nice German. Freak! Weirdo! 542 00:36:48,970 --> 00:36:51,029 Those things don't grow on trees! 543 00:36:53,875 --> 00:36:57,606 I'm scared of you! I'll come back when you're feeling better. 544 00:37:22,637 --> 00:37:26,573 Think, Pest. Think, think, think! Think, old buddy. 545 00:37:26,641 --> 00:37:31,305 Your people came from the rain forest. You must've inherited some skills. 546 00:37:40,121 --> 00:37:42,282 Now I'm nice and limber. 547 00:38:21,062 --> 00:38:23,189 That's more like it. 548 00:38:23,264 --> 00:38:26,665 My animalistical instincts are finally kicking in. 549 00:38:31,206 --> 00:38:37,008 Himmel, when we find him, I want you to make the kill. 550 00:38:38,980 --> 00:38:41,278 I don't want to make the kill. 551 00:38:41,349 --> 00:38:43,408 I want to be a hairdresser, write musicals. 552 00:38:44,786 --> 00:38:47,653 - What? - You'd love it if it were true. 553 00:38:47,722 --> 00:38:51,988 You'd tell your friends about your hairdresser son who listens to Merman. 554 00:38:54,129 --> 00:38:57,394 Will you look at the size of that snake? 555 00:38:59,767 --> 00:39:03,032 You and your snake obsession! 556 00:39:03,104 --> 00:39:08,303 lf you don't like it, may be you should not have locked me in with a snake. 557 00:39:08,376 --> 00:39:10,606 Are you on that again? 558 00:39:10,678 --> 00:39:14,444 I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to bore you with my life's defining trauma. 559 00:39:16,084 --> 00:39:18,245 It's not dry enough. 560 00:39:21,256 --> 00:39:23,884 I can never please him. 561 00:39:29,030 --> 00:39:31,464 Something is wrong. 562 00:39:31,533 --> 00:39:35,025 What could be wrong? We're hunting a human being. 563 00:39:35,103 --> 00:39:38,504 Other fathers take their sons to baseball games, but... 564 00:39:38,573 --> 00:39:40,507 Tell it to Ricky Lake. 565 00:39:40,575 --> 00:39:44,944 I can see it now. " Nazi Fathers and Their Snake-Obsessed Sons." 566 00:39:46,014 --> 00:39:48,414 What is this? 567 00:40:01,162 --> 00:40:02,595 Get me down. 568 00:40:02,664 --> 00:40:05,360 This Pest is good. 569 00:40:05,433 --> 00:40:08,800 - Get me down! - Don't be such a sissy! 570 00:40:08,870 --> 00:40:12,533 I don't know ifyou've noticed lately, but I am a sissy! 571 00:40:14,976 --> 00:40:17,911 - Whatyou doin'? - Putting you out ofyour misery. 572 00:40:19,480 --> 00:40:20,913 Come on. 573 00:40:26,487 --> 00:40:29,320 - Doyou hear that moaning? - It's me. 574 00:40:29,390 --> 00:40:31,585 No, the other moaning. 575 00:40:39,167 --> 00:40:41,158 My stomach is funky. 576 00:40:42,470 --> 00:40:44,529 Thank God for some privacy. 577 00:40:46,741 --> 00:40:49,710 - My back hurts where the tree hit me. - Quiet. 578 00:40:52,747 --> 00:40:55,841 "Whether 'tis nobler in the mind... 579 00:40:55,917 --> 00:40:59,318 to suffer the slings and arrows... 580 00:40:59,387 --> 00:41:01,753 ofoutrageous fortune..." 581 00:41:03,258 --> 00:41:05,453 Scat. Shoo. 582 00:41:05,526 --> 00:41:08,154 I can't concentrate when I'm being watched. 583 00:41:09,530 --> 00:41:12,158 I farted. Doyou think I smell like this all the time? 584 00:41:15,737 --> 00:41:18,001 What's that smell? 585 00:41:21,009 --> 00:41:23,034 Look. There. 586 00:41:24,579 --> 00:41:26,046 My horoscope. 587 00:41:26,114 --> 00:41:28,207 " Beware ofstrangers offering... 588 00:41:28,283 --> 00:41:31,218 phony scholarships." 589 00:41:31,286 --> 00:41:35,382 Guess I'll have to use my socks. At least they're soft. 590 00:41:37,325 --> 00:41:40,089 I wantyou to take him out. 591 00:41:40,161 --> 00:41:41,685 Why me? 592 00:41:41,763 --> 00:41:45,722 I wantyou to experience the utter ecstasy that comes... 593 00:41:45,800 --> 00:41:49,896 from feeling the hot, throbbing force ofa man's life... 594 00:41:49,971 --> 00:41:51,905 when it's in your hands. 595 00:41:51,973 --> 00:41:53,440 - Poison darts? - Perfect. 596 00:41:53,508 --> 00:41:55,339 Just a second. Oops. 597 00:42:06,120 --> 00:42:07,553 Himmel! 598 00:42:17,865 --> 00:42:19,730 What a mess! 599 00:42:19,801 --> 00:42:22,668 The explosion blew him right out ofhis sneakers. 600 00:42:24,105 --> 00:42:26,369 Looks like your hunt is over. 601 00:42:26,441 --> 00:42:29,535 I'm going back to the house before I miss Hogan's Heroes. 602 00:42:40,788 --> 00:42:42,756 He's alive. 603 00:42:42,824 --> 00:42:46,624 Colonel Hogan, would you join us for dinner tonight? 604 00:42:46,694 --> 00:42:48,889 Colonel Baker is 0going to tell us the truth... 605 00:42:48,963 --> 00:42:52,126 about the German army's glorious Campaign on the Russian front. 606 00:42:52,200 --> 00:42:54,794 Why kill all your appetites? 607 00:43:07,615 --> 00:43:10,607 Pest, you're supposed to be dead! 608 00:43:10,685 --> 00:43:12,676 I can't. 609 00:43:12,754 --> 00:43:14,449 I won't. 610 00:43:14,522 --> 00:43:15,955 I shouldn't. 611 00:43:17,759 --> 00:43:19,727 All right, I will. 612 00:43:19,794 --> 00:43:24,390 - You've got to be quiet. - You! You! 613 00:43:24,465 --> 00:43:27,923 You tried to hunt me. 614 00:43:29,704 --> 00:43:31,137 Get back! 615 00:43:31,205 --> 00:43:33,696 What are you trying to do, perfume me to death? 616 00:43:33,775 --> 00:43:36,073 These are sex secretion pheromones. 617 00:43:36,144 --> 00:43:38,772 Father uses them to lure horny animals into traps. 618 00:43:38,846 --> 00:43:41,212 Here. Watch the tape. 619 00:43:44,952 --> 00:43:47,420 This is disgusting. 620 00:43:49,056 --> 00:43:53,288 I'm gonna take some of these for my girlfriend. 621 00:43:53,361 --> 00:43:56,159 She hates when I go away and don't bring her nothing. 622 00:43:56,230 --> 00:43:58,664 They only work on males. Can I fix you one? 623 00:43:58,733 --> 00:44:00,792 No, you've done enough for one day. 624 00:44:00,868 --> 00:44:03,496 You're mad we tried to cut your head off? 625 00:44:03,571 --> 00:44:08,008 I'm not mad. Do I look mad to you? 626 00:44:10,244 --> 00:44:14,704 I know you're not into all this Wild Kingdom stuff. 627 00:44:14,782 --> 00:44:17,842 So why don't you and I escape back to Miami... 628 00:44:17,919 --> 00:44:21,616 get away from your crazy, ugly, psychotic father, no offense... 629 00:44:21,689 --> 00:44:26,388 and you and I will play snakey-wakey whenever you want to. 630 00:44:26,461 --> 00:44:27,894 Really? 631 00:44:27,962 --> 00:44:29,486 C-Certainly. 632 00:44:32,166 --> 00:44:36,125 - We'll takeyour father's speed boat. - I get sea sick. 633 00:44:36,204 --> 00:44:37,728 You'll be fine. 634 00:44:53,321 --> 00:44:56,222 I told you, I get sea sick. 635 00:44:56,290 --> 00:44:58,315 Well, no duh! 636 00:44:59,927 --> 00:45:03,090 - What are those seagulls doing? - They've come to eat your vomit. 637 00:45:04,699 --> 00:45:06,963 Will you stop that? 638 00:45:07,034 --> 00:45:10,800 Fine. But I'd watch out for the seagullses if l was you. 639 00:45:11,772 --> 00:45:12,796 Why? 640 00:45:14,108 --> 00:45:16,872 - I'll be leaving now. - It stings. 641 00:45:16,944 --> 00:45:18,639 I'm blind! 642 00:45:18,713 --> 00:45:20,681 Pest, where'd you go? 643 00:45:23,284 --> 00:45:26,378 My father's gonna kill me! 644 00:45:32,560 --> 00:45:34,926 You don't know what the hell you're talking about. 645 00:45:34,996 --> 00:45:37,897 You know the reputation about Latino men, right? 646 00:45:37,965 --> 00:45:41,867 They didn't have any Latino man on the show because everybody knows... 647 00:45:41,936 --> 00:45:46,339 that he would be having his way with Ginger, MaryAnn, Mrs. Howell... 648 00:45:46,407 --> 00:45:48,375 and the Professor. 649 00:45:48,442 --> 00:45:52,378 Then let me ask you a question. Lf you had to choose, who would you pick? 650 00:45:52,446 --> 00:45:54,175 MaryAnn or Ginger? 651 00:45:55,550 --> 00:45:57,074 Ginger. No contest. 652 00:46:00,688 --> 00:46:03,418 - Is that you, man? - Are you all right? 653 00:46:03,491 --> 00:46:05,482 What happened? 654 00:46:05,560 --> 00:46:07,585 I can't go on. 655 00:46:07,662 --> 00:46:11,996 Must have dry land. Oh, dry land! 656 00:46:12,066 --> 00:46:14,193 - You okay? - What happened? 657 00:46:14,268 --> 00:46:16,702 What happened? Oh, God! 658 00:46:16,771 --> 00:46:18,705 The room is spinning! 659 00:46:20,107 --> 00:46:24,635 What happened? What happened? I'll tell you what happened. 660 00:46:27,915 --> 00:46:30,383 Contract. "I want to hunt you." 661 00:46:30,451 --> 00:46:34,717 And his son. " Pet my snake." 662 00:46:36,157 --> 00:46:39,490 " Playmate, come out and play." Seagulls! 663 00:46:39,560 --> 00:46:44,156 He made doody-doody. It was horrible. Don't let them take me back. 664 00:46:45,700 --> 00:46:47,691 What are you saying? 665 00:46:47,768 --> 00:46:51,864 Listen. Take a swim in the pool. It'll helpyou relax. 666 00:46:51,939 --> 00:46:53,372 - Trust me. - A swim? 667 00:46:53,441 --> 00:46:58,003 - A splash. - Obviously, you haven't been listening! 668 00:46:58,079 --> 00:47:03,449 I've been swimming for five hours! What don't you understand? 669 00:47:07,355 --> 00:47:09,220 Maybe one lap? 670 00:47:12,493 --> 00:47:16,725 Then there were 20 of them. Did I say 20? I meant an army. 671 00:47:16,797 --> 00:47:19,163 Don't be faking jacks. 672 00:47:19,233 --> 00:47:23,533 - There's no scammification going on. - You're not being hunted. 673 00:47:23,604 --> 00:47:26,164 - I am too being hunted. - Are not. 674 00:47:26,240 --> 00:47:28,174 - Am too. - Am not. 675 00:47:35,516 --> 00:47:39,213 See? See? I told you. I am being hunted. 676 00:47:39,286 --> 00:47:42,050 Give up, Pest! There's no where to hide. 677 00:47:42,123 --> 00:47:46,856 Thank the Lord, he's here to kill me! 678 00:47:49,030 --> 00:47:51,760 Snap. Run! 679 00:47:56,871 --> 00:47:59,237 That guy's psycho. Why is he after you? 680 00:47:59,306 --> 00:48:02,639 I don't know. Must be my animal magnetism. 681 00:48:02,710 --> 00:48:05,543 Get in. Let's go! Let's get the hell out of here. 682 00:48:09,250 --> 00:48:12,276 I told you I was being hunted. Did you believe me? No. 683 00:48:12,353 --> 00:48:16,153 - Because no one ever believes me. - We believe you. Who's got the plan? 684 00:48:16,223 --> 00:48:19,784 - Okay, I got the master plan. - Kick it. 685 00:48:19,860 --> 00:48:23,387 - Remember my cousin Roger? - The mad fool? 686 00:48:23,464 --> 00:48:27,457 The mad cool guy. We could go to his place and lay low till morning. 687 00:48:27,535 --> 00:48:30,834 - Perfect. I can't. - What? 688 00:48:30,905 --> 00:48:34,636 We gotta make one, stupid, meaningless stop. 689 00:48:34,709 --> 00:48:36,142 Where, Pest? 690 00:48:36,210 --> 00:48:38,838 No place special. Xantha's. 691 00:48:40,247 --> 00:48:43,273 - What's wrong with you? - I'm in love. 692 00:48:43,350 --> 00:48:45,944 I'm sure her parents will understand... 693 00:48:46,020 --> 00:48:49,183 if you explain tonight's not good as you're being hunted. 694 00:48:49,256 --> 00:48:53,625 - They're black. They'll understand. - Yeah? 695 00:48:54,862 --> 00:48:56,853 What's up, freak? 696 00:48:58,866 --> 00:49:00,458 It's me. 697 00:49:01,836 --> 00:49:05,237 You better recognize, baby. You act like... 698 00:49:05,306 --> 00:49:10,972 Yo, Mrs. Kent. I'm not sweating you, but you're one fine heifer. 699 00:49:11,045 --> 00:49:14,276 What's up, Mack Daddy? 700 00:49:14,348 --> 00:49:17,249 Kill whitey. Free Angela Davis. Say it loud. " Be black and be proud." 701 00:49:17,318 --> 00:49:21,254 - Yes, Lord! - Why don't we go in here? 702 00:49:21,322 --> 00:49:24,553 That boy's on drugs. Who's Angela Davis? 703 00:49:24,625 --> 00:49:28,686 All the cars you could get, why did you pick this one? 704 00:49:28,763 --> 00:49:31,197 I thought you'd like it. It's German. 705 00:49:31,265 --> 00:49:33,961 Did you ever hear of BMW, idiot? 706 00:49:34,034 --> 00:49:36,730 I'm sorry I can never please you! 707 00:49:36,804 --> 00:49:41,366 Shh. I'm getting something. Here, have a look. 708 00:49:41,442 --> 00:49:45,742 The tracking device I placed in his underwear seems to be working. 709 00:49:45,813 --> 00:49:49,044 Why does Leo get all the good jobs? 710 00:49:49,116 --> 00:49:52,176 We have a fix on him, sir. Go west! 711 00:49:54,822 --> 00:49:57,655 What's with the African get up? 712 00:49:57,725 --> 00:50:00,319 All this is for you, Xantha-poo. 713 00:50:00,394 --> 00:50:03,261 I'm trying to impressify your parents. 714 00:50:03,330 --> 00:50:08,063 Does it scare you that I arouse the passions of the Dark Continent? 715 00:50:13,274 --> 00:50:16,038 It scares me that you're wearing a dress to dinner. 716 00:50:16,110 --> 00:50:18,874 This is nothing compared to my morning ensemble. 717 00:50:18,946 --> 00:50:22,074 How about a little kiss? Come on, suck face. 718 00:50:23,050 --> 00:50:26,508 Well, I've prepared an authentic Cuban meal. 719 00:50:26,587 --> 00:50:29,249 Platanos e frijos losnegros. 720 00:50:31,926 --> 00:50:33,291 Why Cuban? 721 00:50:33,360 --> 00:50:39,094 Do I look Cuban to you? Do these look like Cuban features toyou? 722 00:50:39,166 --> 00:50:42,294 What does a brother have to do to get some respect around here, bitch? 723 00:50:43,771 --> 00:50:48,731 I'm this close to rioting. This close. lf l wasn't so hungry, I'd leave. 724 00:50:49,543 --> 00:50:51,704 Will you pass me the platanos, please? 725 00:50:52,980 --> 00:50:55,540 Something's gone wrong with the location tracker. 726 00:50:55,616 --> 00:50:58,050 It seems to be overheating. 727 00:51:00,387 --> 00:51:03,220 Honey, are you all right? You're dripping wet. 728 00:51:04,859 --> 00:51:07,589 It's from being next to you. I'm burning up with passion. 729 00:51:07,661 --> 00:51:09,561 Know what I'm saying? 730 00:51:09,630 --> 00:51:13,293 - Don't act like you haven't been there. - Not lately. 731 00:51:14,902 --> 00:51:17,393 I think it's burning out. 732 00:51:19,273 --> 00:51:22,140 That bastard's gonads are sweating. 733 00:51:22,209 --> 00:51:25,007 Boost the power! 734 00:51:30,217 --> 00:51:31,650 I'm burnin' up! 735 00:51:33,020 --> 00:51:36,786 I told the guy at Africans 'R' Us that I wanted summer weight robes. 736 00:51:36,857 --> 00:51:38,688 Drugs. 737 00:51:38,759 --> 00:51:42,195 It burns! Oh, my God, it burns! It's burning! 738 00:51:48,369 --> 00:51:49,631 It burns! 739 00:51:50,671 --> 00:51:53,538 That boy's got syphilis! 740 00:51:56,577 --> 00:51:59,444 Don't be cruel! Get 'em off me! 741 00:52:16,764 --> 00:52:20,723 lf you was abducted by a space alien chick... 742 00:52:20,801 --> 00:52:25,500 would you or would you not have your way with her? 743 00:52:28,242 --> 00:52:31,678 Before it cut off, the signal came from this house. 744 00:52:31,745 --> 00:52:35,237 I'm going in there. You two stay here. 745 00:52:35,316 --> 00:52:39,116 Here, Mr. Shank, I have prepared a dosage... 746 00:52:39,186 --> 00:52:42,212 which will immediately render him unconscious. 747 00:52:42,289 --> 00:52:44,985 Then we can take him with us... 748 00:52:45,059 --> 00:52:47,721 und at our leisure, cut off his head. 749 00:52:47,795 --> 00:52:50,855 Leo, you're a saint. 750 00:52:50,931 --> 00:52:52,626 Be careful, sir. 751 00:52:54,768 --> 00:52:57,430 These Volkswagens are smaller than they used to be. 752 00:52:57,504 --> 00:52:59,199 Check it out. 753 00:52:59,273 --> 00:53:03,937 She's got the body parts of a hot Earth woman. 754 00:53:12,486 --> 00:53:15,455 Fear not, the Pest line shall continue. 755 00:53:15,522 --> 00:53:18,514 My childrens have been saved. 756 00:53:18,592 --> 00:53:20,457 Yeah! 757 00:53:20,527 --> 00:53:25,464 That'll teach me not to spring for extra-strength fungus spray. You know? 758 00:53:28,369 --> 00:53:30,394 Look, man. Look over there. 759 00:53:32,840 --> 00:53:35,104 That's Colonel Klink! 760 00:53:35,175 --> 00:53:37,769 He's climbing through Xantha's window, man! 761 00:53:37,845 --> 00:53:39,779 Wait here. I'll be right back. 762 00:53:39,847 --> 00:53:41,542 Karate time. 763 00:53:42,683 --> 00:53:44,173 Mrs. Kent, my sister. 764 00:53:44,251 --> 00:53:47,015 Let me explain the origins of my blackness one more time. 765 00:53:47,087 --> 00:53:51,421 My Spanish ancestors came and had sex with my Indian ancestors. 766 00:53:51,492 --> 00:53:54,290 And then they had sex with my black ancestors. 767 00:53:54,361 --> 00:53:57,091 Who then had more sex with the Indians. 768 00:53:57,164 --> 00:54:00,964 And there's rumor that somebody slept with aJew. Fancy that! 769 00:54:07,074 --> 00:54:10,669 Mrs. Kent, it's kosher. It's all right. He was an Ethiopian Jew. 770 00:54:13,747 --> 00:54:17,239 I can't find my pills anywhere! 771 00:54:17,317 --> 00:54:20,582 You know how white people's food gives me gas! 772 00:54:20,654 --> 00:54:22,588 What happened? 773 00:54:22,656 --> 00:54:25,420 What did you do to my family? 774 00:54:25,492 --> 00:54:28,325 I don't know. I mentioned I might be prone to celebrate Rosh Hashanah... 775 00:54:28,395 --> 00:54:31,330 and, bam, prejudice rears his ugly head again! 776 00:54:35,736 --> 00:54:38,830 Oh, I see, you're gonna try and kill me. Try it, because... 777 00:54:43,243 --> 00:54:46,542 Could I do that again? I was looking through the wrong thing. 778 00:54:48,615 --> 00:54:51,448 You're a pretty lousy shot for a criminal. 779 00:54:51,518 --> 00:54:52,485 Hello. 780 00:55:03,630 --> 00:55:05,564 Any more surprises? 781 00:55:06,633 --> 00:55:08,601 Don't! 782 00:55:08,669 --> 00:55:10,762 I really hate you. 783 00:55:14,141 --> 00:55:17,076 Let's just get this little game over, shall we? 784 00:55:21,815 --> 00:55:23,806 You missed me! 785 00:55:23,884 --> 00:55:27,479 You Can't hit me You'reabigsuCker-butt 786 00:55:29,256 --> 00:55:31,247 ICan't believe you're German 787 00:55:47,141 --> 00:55:51,009 Where were you? Where the hell were you when I needed you? 788 00:55:51,078 --> 00:55:53,046 I am so glad you're here. Check it. 789 00:55:53,113 --> 00:55:56,947 Would you or would you not have sex with a space alien chick? 790 00:55:57,017 --> 00:55:57,949 What? 791 00:56:02,589 --> 00:56:05,524 We have no way of tracking him anymore. 792 00:56:05,592 --> 00:56:08,220 Just shut up! Give me the phone. 793 00:56:10,330 --> 00:56:11,763 Hello? 794 00:56:11,832 --> 00:56:16,132 Oh, yo! What's up, yo? Listen up. 795 00:56:16,203 --> 00:56:20,264 I got the 4-1-1 on Pest Vargas, mamasita. 796 00:56:20,340 --> 00:56:25,505 - Who is this? - This is the bum and all that. 797 00:56:25,579 --> 00:56:27,274 Listen. 798 00:56:27,347 --> 00:56:31,443 The word up is that Pest Vargas has goosed your nugget... 799 00:56:31,518 --> 00:56:34,885 and is gonna skip the foot in the morning, homey. 800 00:56:34,955 --> 00:56:36,923 Why are you telling me this? What's he done to you? 801 00:56:36,990 --> 00:56:42,394 Well, he called my mother a big, fat Scottish slut. 802 00:56:42,462 --> 00:56:44,453 We'll take care of it. 803 00:56:45,999 --> 00:56:49,901 Fellas, put all the men out on the street looking for the Pest. 804 00:56:49,970 --> 00:56:52,268 He's out there somewhere and I wanna find him. 805 00:56:52,339 --> 00:56:54,705 They're putting the word out. 806 00:56:56,276 --> 00:57:00,235 I'll be able to monitor all their incoming calls. 807 00:57:00,314 --> 00:57:03,579 So, we'll know where he is as soon as they do. 808 00:57:14,761 --> 00:57:17,958 We gotta find a place to hide. I'm serious! 809 00:57:18,031 --> 00:57:20,522 Where's the last place Gustav would think of looking? 810 00:57:20,601 --> 00:57:24,037 - Think! Use your head! - All right! Calm down! 811 00:57:25,606 --> 00:57:28,040 Yo, Pest. Check it out. 812 00:57:30,944 --> 00:57:33,674 Oh, no. Oh, no! 813 00:57:34,481 --> 00:57:37,279 Hello, Jews! 814 00:57:39,453 --> 00:57:41,387 Nobody's gonna see us here. What are you... 815 00:57:46,760 --> 00:57:52,528 Shalom! And mazol tov, my little gefiltes and yentas. 816 00:57:52,599 --> 00:57:54,965 And you are? 817 00:57:55,035 --> 00:57:57,697 I am a meshuggener, but of course. 818 00:57:57,771 --> 00:58:02,799 Let me introduce myself. My name is Rabbi Vargassteenstine. 819 00:58:02,876 --> 00:58:05,470 And this is my farChadat associate... 820 00:58:05,545 --> 00:58:10,073 Rabbi Chubby Bergbaumsteenstein. 821 00:58:10,150 --> 00:58:14,519 Yes, I know! He's an Ethiopian Jew from Ethiopia, of course. 822 00:58:14,588 --> 00:58:16,249 Really? Where in Ethiopia? 823 00:58:16,323 --> 00:58:18,814 Yo, man, I'm from South Bay, bro... 824 00:58:18,892 --> 00:58:21,417 Unfortunately, the Lord saw fit to take away his voice box. 825 00:58:21,495 --> 00:58:24,123 But he has a canasta game to die for. 826 00:58:24,197 --> 00:58:27,997 We'd like to stay, but I got a pain in my tchotchke. I gotta go. 827 00:58:29,436 --> 00:58:33,338 Angus, I think I've found our man. 828 00:58:34,541 --> 00:58:38,807 Sir, look. It seems our Latino has found religion. 829 00:58:38,879 --> 00:58:41,370 He appears to be leaving a synagogue. 830 00:58:45,852 --> 00:58:49,310 So, funny looking, got any more genius ideas? 831 00:58:49,389 --> 00:58:51,550 Yo, man. I'll pick another place. 832 00:58:51,625 --> 00:58:54,116 No, thanks. I'm pickin' the place. 833 00:58:54,194 --> 00:58:57,459 Right here at the Paris Club. There's a private party going on. 834 00:58:57,531 --> 00:58:59,465 I'll pull into the parking lot. 835 00:59:05,072 --> 00:59:07,700 Hey, yo! It's all lovely. 836 00:59:07,774 --> 00:59:10,800 I hear there's a mad-sick party going on. 837 00:59:10,877 --> 00:59:12,868 Can you hook up a brother and his brother? 838 00:59:12,946 --> 00:59:17,610 Mad? Dude, parties are never mad. 839 00:59:17,684 --> 00:59:19,413 They're angry! Duh! 840 00:59:20,220 --> 00:59:22,120 The thing is... 841 00:59:22,189 --> 00:59:25,124 this is a private party, Cheech! 842 00:59:26,126 --> 00:59:27,559 I can't believe this. 843 00:59:27,627 --> 00:59:30,187 Seriously, I bet you could get in the servants' entrance. 844 00:59:31,832 --> 00:59:35,290 - You guys are harsh! - Yeah, you guys are harsh! 845 00:59:35,369 --> 00:59:37,303 Actually, you guys suck. 846 00:59:38,839 --> 00:59:42,275 - Yo, chumps, get stupid. - I can get stupid. 847 00:59:42,342 --> 00:59:44,970 You know what to do. Spank 'em, brother! 848 00:59:45,045 --> 00:59:47,570 Let's party! 849 00:59:47,647 --> 00:59:50,309 Go, white boy! Go, white boy! 850 00:59:50,384 --> 00:59:51,749 Crank it, dude! 851 01:00:26,753 --> 01:00:29,779 Wanna make its way, Make it say How do you like that, baby 852 01:00:30,857 --> 01:00:34,452 Spank and napping till this happened Spank it all around 853 01:00:35,996 --> 01:00:38,021 How do you like that, baby 854 01:00:43,570 --> 01:00:46,130 How do you like that, baby 855 01:00:50,644 --> 01:00:52,839 Spank it 856 01:01:22,209 --> 01:01:25,076 Oh, snap. This one fainted. 857 01:01:25,145 --> 01:01:28,410 I'm not gonna let you have any white people unless you take care of them. 858 01:01:32,385 --> 01:01:35,183 Shall we go clubbing, or shall we go clubbing? 859 01:01:35,255 --> 01:01:37,450 Yeah, let's go clubbing. 860 01:01:47,200 --> 01:01:49,191 There's a party over here! 861 01:01:50,337 --> 01:01:53,033 Pest and Chub in the house! 862 01:01:53,106 --> 01:01:56,234 So good, baby. You know how it is. 863 01:01:56,309 --> 01:02:01,337 - Oh, snap. Is that one of Angus's men? - What's he doing here? 864 01:02:01,414 --> 01:02:04,645 Let's not wait to find out. Let's Houdini outta here. 865 01:02:07,654 --> 01:02:11,454 Plaid every where! Plaid here, plaid there. 866 01:02:11,525 --> 01:02:14,756 - I need reinforcements. Call Ninja. - Ninga, for reinforcements? 867 01:02:23,670 --> 01:02:24,932 Hello? 868 01:02:27,007 --> 01:02:28,440 Wakey, wakey. 869 01:02:28,508 --> 01:02:30,442 Do you realize that while you'r enapping... 870 01:02:30,510 --> 01:02:33,274 your bestest of friends are being stalked? 871 01:02:33,346 --> 01:02:34,745 That's nice. 872 01:02:34,814 --> 01:02:36,281 How's my Xantha-poo? 873 01:02:36,349 --> 01:02:39,648 A tranquilizer dart is in her butt. 874 01:02:39,719 --> 01:02:41,846 Thank God! That'll suck up all the poison. 875 01:02:41,922 --> 01:02:45,790 We need you to Come to the Paris Club like right now. 876 01:02:45,859 --> 01:02:48,919 Meet us in the Karaoke Room. Later, masturbator. 877 01:02:51,097 --> 01:02:52,530 Hi, there! 878 01:02:56,603 --> 01:02:59,037 - Hey, big guy. - Excuse me. 879 01:02:59,105 --> 01:03:03,508 We gotta split up and find Vargas before the Scottish gentlemen do. 880 01:03:03,577 --> 01:03:05,010 Split up. 881 01:03:07,380 --> 01:03:08,813 See ya. 882 01:03:14,087 --> 01:03:17,454 - Have you seen a little Latin boy? - This is the models' changing room! 883 01:03:17,524 --> 01:03:20,823 - Get out of my face! - What do you think you're doing? 884 01:03:22,162 --> 01:03:23,652 Excuse me. 885 01:03:23,730 --> 01:03:25,664 Excuse me. Good day. 886 01:03:25,732 --> 01:03:30,431 I'm gonna get Ninja in the Karaoke Room and meet you in the Jeep. 887 01:03:30,503 --> 01:03:31,936 Go for it. 888 01:03:37,744 --> 01:03:39,541 Sorry, sorry. 889 01:04:04,904 --> 01:04:09,432 Got a lifetime to share 890 01:04:09,509 --> 01:04:13,411 So muCh to say 891 01:04:13,480 --> 01:04:16,677 For only time 892 01:04:16,750 --> 01:04:18,411 My God, you suck! 893 01:04:18,485 --> 01:04:20,885 I'm not just saying it lightly. You really suck! 894 01:04:20,954 --> 01:04:23,218 I wanna put a hot poker through my ears! 895 01:04:23,289 --> 01:04:26,349 What'd you do with your singing les... Get off me. You don't know me. 896 01:04:26,426 --> 01:04:28,394 - Let me show you to a chair. - Don't show me nothing. 897 01:04:28,461 --> 01:04:30,986 Show me the way outta here. 898 01:04:31,064 --> 01:04:33,692 - Goodness gracious! - Good show, ja? 899 01:04:34,501 --> 01:04:37,095 Ja, is a good show. 900 01:04:37,170 --> 01:04:39,138 Could you go away, little man? You bother me. 901 01:04:39,205 --> 01:04:42,140 - He wants a tip. - A tip? Why didn't you say so? 902 01:04:42,208 --> 01:04:45,268 You buy Honda stock. Okay, get away. Your breath smells. 903 01:04:45,345 --> 01:04:48,337 He's so too sucky. I can't... 904 01:04:52,185 --> 01:04:53,618 Ninja! Ninja! 905 01:04:57,323 --> 01:05:01,123 - Ninja. I am a Ninja warrior. - Really! 906 01:05:01,194 --> 01:05:03,162 Who would like to be next? 907 01:05:03,229 --> 01:05:04,594 Don't be shy. 908 01:05:04,664 --> 01:05:06,427 All right, sir. 909 01:05:06,499 --> 01:05:09,400 - Come on up. - You go. 910 01:05:11,037 --> 01:05:13,505 Don't be bashful. Come up. 911 01:05:13,573 --> 01:05:17,168 You make mistake. I go. No, I can't. 912 01:05:17,243 --> 01:05:21,612 - Come on up. - I can, I can. 913 01:05:21,681 --> 01:05:23,774 All right! 914 01:05:23,850 --> 01:05:26,410 I was hoping to see my family. Shoguns and all that. 915 01:05:28,154 --> 01:05:30,122 It's a dangerous crowd out there. 916 01:05:30,190 --> 01:05:32,954 Which Karaoke selection are you going to do? 917 01:05:33,026 --> 01:05:35,961 - What selections do we have today? - They're on the monitor. 918 01:05:39,099 --> 01:05:42,159 "TV Favorites." Why not? Okay. 919 01:05:42,235 --> 01:05:46,365 All right, TV Favorites. Take it away. 920 01:05:47,240 --> 01:05:49,174 I didn't know they had words to this! 921 01:05:49,242 --> 01:05:52,439 We got a right to piCk a little fight, Bonanza 922 01:05:52,512 --> 01:05:56,471 lf any one fights any one He's got to fight with me 923 01:05:56,549 --> 01:05:59,450 I might want to saddle up in one Bonanza 924 01:05:59,519 --> 01:06:01,180 What are you doing? 925 01:06:01,254 --> 01:06:04,052 I'm taking a break. 926 01:06:04,124 --> 01:06:06,149 - One for four, Four fo rone - You suck! 927 01:06:06,226 --> 01:06:09,957 No, you suck! I kick your... PiCka little fight Bonanza 928 01:06:10,029 --> 01:06:13,760 Do you recognize the little Japanese guy? 929 01:06:13,833 --> 01:06:15,960 - No. - You sure? 930 01:06:20,740 --> 01:06:22,674 Thank you very much. 931 01:06:22,742 --> 01:06:27,202 That is Pest Vargas, you idiot! 932 01:06:28,982 --> 01:06:33,146 I'm going to sing another song, something from my childhood. 933 01:06:37,056 --> 01:06:39,388 You annoying little weasel, Pest Vargas! 934 01:06:39,459 --> 01:06:42,917 You a big irritate, round eye. I am not Pest. 935 01:06:43,730 --> 01:06:47,530 I am Uni Wasabi. 936 01:06:49,335 --> 01:06:54,068 I had the pleasure of hunting Uni Wasabi, and you are no Uni Wasabi. 937 01:06:54,140 --> 01:06:55,573 I am too! 938 01:06:58,344 --> 01:07:01,541 Perhaps this will help you decide. 939 01:07:01,614 --> 01:07:04,276 Perhaps this... 940 01:07:04,350 --> 01:07:07,080 will helpyou decide. 941 01:07:09,689 --> 01:07:13,284 You defend yourself with a punyvile of cat piss? 942 01:07:13,359 --> 01:07:16,795 - Leo, go get him. - It's the sex pheromones. 943 01:07:18,932 --> 01:07:20,524 Gustav... 944 01:07:20,600 --> 01:07:24,263 I find myself strangely drawn to you. 945 01:07:24,337 --> 01:07:26,931 - Father, I feel funny. - What? 946 01:07:32,111 --> 01:07:34,773 Let me at him. 947 01:07:34,848 --> 01:07:37,681 You horny dog. I should've had you fixed. 948 01:07:37,750 --> 01:07:39,274 Let me go. 949 01:07:39,352 --> 01:07:42,844 I didn't know you could sing. 950 01:07:42,922 --> 01:07:45,186 Stick with me, son, and I'll learn ya. 951 01:07:45,258 --> 01:07:48,489 - Where's Gustav? - He's meeting some new people. 952 01:07:48,561 --> 01:07:51,496 - Let's go. - I think you should come with us. 953 01:07:51,564 --> 01:07:55,125 No, thanks. My mother said never to go with strangers. 954 01:07:55,201 --> 01:07:58,261 But you seem nice. 955 01:08:03,376 --> 01:08:07,244 Pest, Pest, Pest, you're a great disappointment. 956 01:08:07,313 --> 01:08:11,249 You thought I was gonna be taller? I get that a lot, don't I? 957 01:08:11,317 --> 01:08:14,115 Why don't you do that impression I like so much? 958 01:08:14,187 --> 01:08:18,317 I don't want to. The Italians never make me do impressions. 959 01:08:18,391 --> 01:08:21,485 - Do it. - Captain, I cannot do it. 960 01:08:21,561 --> 01:08:24,758 The dilithium crystals are breaking up. She's gonna blow. 961 01:08:35,675 --> 01:08:36,869 Not so fast. 962 01:08:38,244 --> 01:08:39,802 Where's my money? 963 01:08:39,879 --> 01:08:42,814 Look, I'll have the money... What's the day after today? 964 01:08:42,882 --> 01:08:44,941 - Tomorrow. - My word is my bond. 965 01:08:45,018 --> 01:08:46,952 I don't trust your word. 966 01:08:47,020 --> 01:08:50,751 Okay. Then... 967 01:08:50,823 --> 01:08:55,385 take as collateral that which is the most precious to me in the world. 968 01:08:55,461 --> 01:08:58,658 And what would that be, Mr. Vargas? 969 01:09:01,000 --> 01:09:03,969 It's my best friend... 970 01:09:06,406 --> 01:09:08,169 Ninja. 971 01:09:09,709 --> 01:09:12,143 Pest, don't leave me! They've got skirts! 972 01:09:13,313 --> 01:09:15,543 Don't worry, little friend. 973 01:09:17,116 --> 01:09:19,607 I can't believe you just did that. 974 01:09:19,686 --> 01:09:23,019 Don't worry. I got it all covered. The 24 hours is almost up. 975 01:09:23,089 --> 01:09:26,024 Then we'll get Gustav's money, then we'll pick him up like that. 976 01:09:26,092 --> 01:09:29,789 - I'm not talking about that! - What are you talking about? 977 01:09:29,862 --> 01:09:34,424 You said he was your best friend. I thought I was your best friend. 978 01:09:35,902 --> 01:09:38,700 Chubby-woomsy. 979 01:09:38,771 --> 01:09:42,502 You are my best friend. That's why I picked Ninja. 980 01:09:50,717 --> 01:09:52,150 Hello. 981 01:09:52,218 --> 01:09:55,085 - Hello, Pest. - The one and only. 982 01:09:55,154 --> 01:09:58,920 And you are? Wait, don't tell me. You'll spoil the moment. 983 01:09:58,992 --> 01:10:00,425 Gustav. 984 01:10:00,493 --> 01:10:03,462 Pest, you have a marvelous family. 985 01:10:03,529 --> 01:10:07,260 My family was never part of the contract. 986 01:10:07,333 --> 01:10:10,894 Neither was your girlfriend's family or her best friend. 987 01:10:10,970 --> 01:10:14,701 But I don't care. I'm gonna kill 'em all! 988 01:10:14,774 --> 01:10:19,143 He's gonna kill my family. You do that and you're gonna be in big trouble. 989 01:10:19,212 --> 01:10:22,375 Jail even. Can you say "prison bitch"? 990 01:10:24,250 --> 01:10:26,650 Tomorrow I return to my homeland... 991 01:10:26,719 --> 01:10:29,483 where I regain my status as a Citizen of Germany. 992 01:10:29,555 --> 01:10:32,149 But first I have to settle up with you. 993 01:10:32,225 --> 01:10:37,128 No, Gustav. You're always thinking of others. We're even. Go back to Germany. 994 01:10:37,196 --> 01:10:40,324 Don't even worry about saying good-bye. Send me a postcard. Fax if you can. 995 01:10:40,400 --> 01:10:44,894 You better get to the freighter at pier 16 in 20 minutes... 996 01:10:44,971 --> 01:10:48,771 or you're gonna be one lonely little Latino. 997 01:10:48,841 --> 01:10:53,437 I'll be there. But for any reason I'm late, could you start with Malaria? 998 01:10:56,215 --> 01:11:01,118 Head to Liberty Ship on pier 16. Step on it, double it, man! 999 01:11:05,958 --> 01:11:09,018 Don't be so jumpy. 1000 01:11:09,095 --> 01:11:12,292 - He's got a gun! - Leave me alone! 1001 01:11:12,365 --> 01:11:17,496 Why are you doing this? Why are you hunting my Pest? 1002 01:11:17,570 --> 01:11:23,372 The man you know as Pest is actually an operative in your secret service. 1003 01:11:23,443 --> 01:11:27,607 The underworld has placed a high price on his head. I intend to collect. 1004 01:11:29,248 --> 01:11:32,445 See, Felix? I told you that my Pest wasn't just a bum! 1005 01:11:32,518 --> 01:11:34,748 Actually, I lied. I'm just hunting him... 1006 01:11:34,821 --> 01:11:40,157 because no one will miss an inconsequential flotsam like him. 1007 01:11:40,226 --> 01:11:43,593 - That makes more sense. - How could you agree with this monster? 1008 01:11:43,663 --> 01:11:46,791 - Be quiet. - Sit down. He gets angry. 1009 01:11:57,076 --> 01:12:00,307 You stay here and guard them. 1010 01:12:00,379 --> 01:12:02,677 I'm going to go look around. 1011 01:12:10,223 --> 01:12:15,661 Oh, Jack! Oh, SlapJones, we finally got the good stuff, kid. 1012 01:12:16,896 --> 01:12:19,922 - Be all you can be! - Don't ask, don't tell, right? 1013 01:12:19,999 --> 01:12:21,933 What's that mean? 1014 01:12:22,001 --> 01:12:24,333 - Nothing. - Just checking. 1015 01:12:28,774 --> 01:12:30,935 You have to believe me. 1016 01:12:31,010 --> 01:12:32,944 None of this was my idea. 1017 01:12:36,015 --> 01:12:39,143 I feel you understand. I get seasick! 1018 01:12:39,218 --> 01:12:41,584 Why would I want to be on a boat? 1019 01:12:41,654 --> 01:12:44,418 Snake boy's got every body I care about down there. 1020 01:12:44,490 --> 01:12:46,549 We gotta think of something fast. 1021 01:12:46,626 --> 01:12:51,620 I'm gonna give Gustav a little attitude adjustment, so you're gonna have... 1022 01:12:51,697 --> 01:12:53,927 I'm not a bad person. 1023 01:12:54,000 --> 01:12:58,198 To tell you the truth, I don't think he's my father. 1024 01:12:59,238 --> 01:13:01,934 Gustav, where are you? 1025 01:13:02,008 --> 01:13:03,999 I have arrived! 1026 01:13:06,345 --> 01:13:09,906 Welcome to the Love Boat. I'm your waiter Isaac. 1027 01:13:09,982 --> 01:13:14,078 Gustav, where are you? 1028 01:13:14,153 --> 01:13:16,212 Don't be shy. 1029 01:13:16,289 --> 01:13:19,019 Goosey, I can see your bald spot. 1030 01:13:19,091 --> 01:13:21,685 You're getting warmer. Oh, you're getting hot. 1031 01:13:21,761 --> 01:13:24,696 You're getting really hot. You're boiling! You're on fire! 1032 01:13:26,032 --> 01:13:28,933 Goosey, look, I'm over here. 1033 01:13:29,001 --> 01:13:30,935 I'm a shadow of my former self. 1034 01:13:35,841 --> 01:13:37,274 SuCker! 1035 01:13:39,645 --> 01:13:45,015 I'm the big Cornholio. I need T.D. for my bungholio. 1036 01:13:45,084 --> 01:13:48,110 Oh, woeisme. Someone's turned me in to a walkie-talkie. 1037 01:13:48,187 --> 01:13:51,782 Help me! Help me! 1038 01:13:51,857 --> 01:13:54,382 Why don't you come out, Pest? 1039 01:13:54,460 --> 01:13:59,124 What have you got left after smoking a huge cigar? A big butt! 1040 01:14:24,657 --> 01:14:26,591 Where are you, Pest? 1041 01:14:28,227 --> 01:14:31,924 You got me, Gustav! You got me laughin' at you. 1042 01:14:31,998 --> 01:14:34,330 My father is insane. 1043 01:14:34,400 --> 01:14:36,595 Do you know what he did to me as a child? 1044 01:14:39,972 --> 01:14:42,463 All right, funny boy. 1045 01:14:44,176 --> 01:14:48,112 lf you don't come out, your girlfriend gets it. 1046 01:14:48,180 --> 01:14:51,741 All right, saggy cheeks. But if l come out, you gotta let her go. 1047 01:14:51,817 --> 01:14:53,079 Deal! 1048 01:14:59,225 --> 01:15:00,749 Let her go. 1049 01:15:06,866 --> 01:15:09,733 - You're all right! - Everything's okay. 1050 01:15:09,802 --> 01:15:11,531 Now come closer. 1051 01:15:11,604 --> 01:15:14,505 Any closer and I'd be intimate with you. 1052 01:15:16,175 --> 01:15:19,144 - Only one pest can't be exterminated. - But I thought... 1053 01:15:21,681 --> 01:15:24,411 Now drop your weapons. 1054 01:15:27,720 --> 01:15:30,382 I don't know how long I can keep this thing from firing. 1055 01:15:33,626 --> 01:15:35,719 I loved it. 1056 01:15:35,795 --> 01:15:39,094 I guess we just sit here and wait till I become a rich man. 1057 01:15:41,233 --> 01:15:43,394 I meant to do that. 1058 01:15:47,606 --> 01:15:50,097 Let me ask you a question. 1059 01:15:50,176 --> 01:15:51,973 How do you feel? 1060 01:15:53,346 --> 01:15:57,373 Fine. Why, do I look bloated? Am I bloated? 1061 01:15:57,450 --> 01:16:00,214 Do you remember our little toast on the island, Pest? 1062 01:16:00,286 --> 01:16:03,153 How could I forget? It gave me indigestion. 1063 01:16:04,457 --> 01:16:06,084 I poisoned your drink. 1064 01:16:06,158 --> 01:16:08,092 What? 1065 01:16:08,160 --> 01:16:12,597 And the poison kills in exactly 18 hours. 1066 01:16:12,665 --> 01:16:14,496 You are so diabolical. 1067 01:16:14,567 --> 01:16:17,263 Ja. You've got 15 seconds. 1068 01:16:17,336 --> 01:16:18,997 Enjoy it. 1069 01:16:23,175 --> 01:16:28,169 And by the way, the safe deposit box is in the Miami Central Bank. 1070 01:16:28,247 --> 01:16:31,011 Your $50,000 is in there. 1071 01:16:31,083 --> 01:16:33,517 Not that it would do you any good. 1072 01:16:37,990 --> 01:16:39,981 What are you talking about? Hold this. 1073 01:16:40,059 --> 01:16:42,459 I never felt better in my life! 1074 01:16:42,528 --> 01:16:44,519 lf l was poisoned, could I do this? 1075 01:16:47,032 --> 01:16:50,661 Or this? Or this? 1076 01:17:10,356 --> 01:17:12,085 I got the head bag. 1077 01:17:12,158 --> 01:17:14,285 Forget it. That face would just annoy me. 1078 01:17:14,360 --> 01:17:15,827 You cheated! 1079 01:17:15,895 --> 01:17:20,559 - Not now. We'll discuss this at home. - You'd have to shoot me first. 1080 01:17:23,035 --> 01:17:26,004 - Can't believe you shot him! - He's wearing a bullet proofvest. 1081 01:17:27,740 --> 01:17:30,208 It doesn't mean it doesn't hurt. 1082 01:17:30,276 --> 01:17:33,507 All right, fine! Himmel, you stay here amongst the losers. 1083 01:17:33,579 --> 01:17:35,012 Come on, Leo. 1084 01:17:36,382 --> 01:17:38,316 Where to? 1085 01:17:38,384 --> 01:17:41,751 We have much to do. We're on our way to the homeland. 1086 01:17:47,660 --> 01:17:51,858 Good morning. I need to get into my safe deposit box. 1087 01:17:51,931 --> 01:17:54,491 Of course, Mr. Shank. The guard will let you in. 1088 01:17:54,567 --> 01:17:57,229 Ja. Splendid. 1089 01:18:03,943 --> 01:18:06,411 I'll just be a minute, Andy. 1090 01:18:38,744 --> 01:18:40,371 Hello? 1091 01:18:40,446 --> 01:18:42,243 Surprise! 1092 01:18:42,314 --> 01:18:44,805 - Pest! - Yup. 1093 01:18:44,884 --> 01:18:47,853 - But, the poison should've... - Killed me? 1094 01:18:47,920 --> 01:18:52,823 Not likely, sinCe I puked up all the poison on that thrilling boat ride. 1095 01:18:52,892 --> 01:18:58,592 With the help of my friend, the German Ambassador, I liberated your money. 1096 01:18:58,664 --> 01:19:03,158 - My money? - Right. And there was more than $50,000. 1097 01:19:03,235 --> 01:19:07,137 And CheCk this. The Ambassador also spoke withthe authorities about your... 1098 01:19:07,206 --> 01:19:09,299 How should l put itECCentriC hunting aCtivities. 1099 01:19:09,375 --> 01:19:12,902 Hello, fellas. Good-bye. Don't forget to write. 1100 01:19:12,978 --> 01:19:14,570 I'll get you! 1101 01:19:16,916 --> 01:19:19,942 No! No! I do not recognize your authority. 1102 01:19:20,019 --> 01:19:22,715 Go, Pest Freak to the east 1103 01:19:24,557 --> 01:19:25,990 Yes! 1104 01:19:27,059 --> 01:19:29,527 There he is! I'm gonna kill you! 1105 01:19:29,595 --> 01:19:32,155 - How dare you! - I'm sorry, Mr. Ambassador. 1106 01:19:32,231 --> 01:19:34,165 He's not the Ambassador. He's an impostor! 1107 01:19:34,233 --> 01:19:39,170 How dare you question my authority! 1108 01:19:39,238 --> 01:19:43,004 lf l wasn't the Ambassador... 1109 01:19:43,075 --> 01:19:46,340 would I have the confidence to do this? 1110 01:19:47,546 --> 01:19:49,309 and this? 1111 01:19:53,886 --> 01:19:56,878 Would I have the down right perverse impudence... 1112 01:19:56,956 --> 01:19:58,856 and lack of love for my fellow man to do this? 1113 01:19:58,924 --> 01:20:01,154 - Wedgie! - God! 1114 01:20:01,226 --> 01:20:03,717 There fore I must be the Ambassador. 1115 01:20:03,796 --> 01:20:05,855 He is not even German. 1116 01:20:05,931 --> 01:20:07,626 Our feet are the same. 1117 01:20:07,700 --> 01:20:10,965 Good-bye to you and you and you! 1118 01:20:11,036 --> 01:20:12,970 Let's take him away! 1119 01:20:22,214 --> 01:20:25,115 Vargas, here's your garbage back! 1120 01:20:25,184 --> 01:20:28,745 Ninja, you all right? What's up, man? 1121 01:20:28,821 --> 01:20:31,756 I knew you were my best friend, right? 1122 01:20:31,824 --> 01:20:33,849 - I know. - He stole my clothes. 1123 01:20:33,926 --> 01:20:35,894 Get your white behind in this jeep. 1124 01:20:35,961 --> 01:20:39,556 How many times do I have to tell you? I'm half black. 1125 01:20:39,632 --> 01:20:41,497 Honey, get over yourself. 1126 01:20:48,574 --> 01:20:52,010 I like to boogie with my Creeps Cruise and Creep 1127 01:20:52,077 --> 01:20:54,238 Playin'three-Cardmonty on these Crazy streets 1128 01:20:54,313 --> 01:20:56,406 Greathustler I'm gonna sCam in a minute 1129 01:20:56,482 --> 01:20:58,575 So low to the floor PiCk the poCket on a midget 1130 01:20:58,651 --> 01:21:01,211 SliCkshyster The PestMeister 1131 01:21:01,286 --> 01:21:04,221 Living life in Miami's viCe Ma, see 1132 01:21:04,289 --> 01:21:07,986 No body mess in' with the frog, see Where's your Messiah now 1133 01:21:08,060 --> 01:21:11,621 Voodoo mambo Chili Congo 1134 01:21:11,697 --> 01:21:14,291 Old sChool beat meets Latin freak You don't stop 1135 01:21:14,366 --> 01:21:19,895 Sweet mambo, do the mambo, yeah Chili Congo 1136 01:21:19,972 --> 01:21:24,306 When your sChool beat meets Latin freak You don't quit and you don't stop 1137 01:21:30,416 --> 01:21:33,977 I'm hurting, allright, already I'm "ridiCuliCulous" 1138 01:21:34,053 --> 01:21:36,453 Like a booger I stiCk to this 1139 01:21:36,522 --> 01:21:40,652 Take a whiff of this I'm stinky dinky 1140 01:21:40,726 --> 01:21:44,492 Two stinky dinky 1141 01:21:44,563 --> 01:21:50,160 Three stinky dinky 1142 01:21:50,235 --> 01:21:54,001 Mirror, mirror on the wall who is thes liCkest of them all 1143 01:21:54,073 --> 01:21:58,635 It's the sCheming estkeenest sCam artist God, it's so hard to be modest! 1144 01:22:01,246 --> 01:22:03,373 Put up the fistiCuff sand then 1145 01:22:03,449 --> 01:22:07,408 Put 'em up Put 'em up even 1146 01:22:07,486 --> 01:22:11,616 Voodoomambo chili Congo 1147 01:22:11,690 --> 01:22:14,022 Old sChool beat meets Latins treet and you don't stop 1148 01:22:24,503 --> 01:22:26,471 JaCk may be nimble but l'm a sex symbol 1149 01:22:26,538 --> 01:22:28,597 So sliCk Is tole the wiCk from his CandlestiCk 1150 01:22:28,674 --> 01:22:32,667 I'm in the mood to sCam simply beCause I Can 1151 01:22:32,745 --> 01:22:34,542 I'm the Latin Houdini 1152 01:22:34,613 --> 01:22:37,275 Disappear in a flash with your Cash and l'm baCk like a genie 1153 01:22:38,584 --> 01:22:41,781 Lucy, I'm home! Don't do that to me, Lucy! 1154 01:22:41,854 --> 01:22:43,549 Freak to the east Freak to the west 1155 01:22:43,622 --> 01:22:46,284 Freak big booties and big Chest 1156 01:22:46,358 --> 01:22:50,192 Yes, y all, and it's like that! Why certainly! 1157 01:22:50,262 --> 01:22:54,221 Get stupid, get retarded 'Cause Pest'll get the party started 1158 01:22:54,299 --> 01:22:57,962 Which way did he go, George? Which way did he go? 1159 01:22:58,036 --> 01:23:01,005 FunkadoCious, grooviloCious atroCious 1160 01:23:07,412 --> 01:23:09,073 I'm a man of a million disguises 1161 01:23:09,148 --> 01:23:11,514 I'm as Crazy as they make 'em I shake 'em, I break 'em 1162 01:23:11,583 --> 01:23:15,644 So sCientific, hate to be speCific E=mC2 1163 01:23:15,721 --> 01:23:19,122 Multiply, divide it, slide up inside it blend it, mix it 1164 01:23:19,191 --> 01:23:20,158 Damn, I'm terrific 1165 01:23:24,797 --> 01:23:28,528 Hippity, hoppity FeeCropoly, suffering suCCotash 1166 01:23:28,600 --> 01:23:30,659 I'm smarter than the average man, Booboo 1167 01:23:41,780 --> 01:23:43,042 Wait! 1168 01:24:05,938 --> 01:24:09,465 - All like this and like that, right? - Like this and like that! 1169 01:24:09,541 --> 01:24:12,237 You know what they say? Never trust a big butt and a smile. 1170 01:24:12,311 --> 01:24:13,744 That's what you trust. 90644

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.