All language subtitles for Tacoma FD S04E09 Gone Dutch 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP 5 1 H 264-CSd_track3_[eng]

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic Download
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified) Download
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek Download
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean Download
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil) Download
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,872 --> 00:00:04,874 - Probie, beer me. 2 00:00:04,917 --> 00:00:07,181 I had the hefeweizen. - Yeah, I had the IPA. 3 00:00:07,224 --> 00:00:09,357 - Hey, you think he knows that those valves are all hooked up 4 00:00:09,400 --> 00:00:11,272 to the same vat of beer? - [chuckles] 5 00:00:11,315 --> 00:00:12,751 Who cares? He's just a probie. 6 00:00:12,795 --> 00:00:13,970 Watch the foam. 7 00:00:14,014 --> 00:00:15,363 Who taught you how to pour beer? 8 00:00:15,406 --> 00:00:17,060 - All right, I'm ready to go in. - All right. 9 00:00:17,104 --> 00:00:20,194 - Probie, you are about to take part in a unique odyssey 10 00:00:20,237 --> 00:00:22,152 the likes of which you have never seen. 11 00:00:22,196 --> 00:00:24,502 There will be laughs, there will be tears, 12 00:00:24,546 --> 00:00:27,418 and there will be fights. - And booze and song. 13 00:00:27,462 --> 00:00:30,030 - It's like Coachella, Woodstock, and Lollapalooza 14 00:00:30,073 --> 00:00:31,466 all mixed into one. 15 00:00:31,509 --> 00:00:32,510 - Probie, there ain't no party 16 00:00:32,554 --> 00:00:34,077 like a firefighter's wake. 17 00:00:34,121 --> 00:00:37,080 - Yeah, let's go! Love you, Dutch! 18 00:00:37,124 --> 00:00:38,560 [laughter] 19 00:00:38,603 --> 00:00:40,736 - Welcome to the jungle, probie. 20 00:00:40,779 --> 00:00:42,564 Buckle up. - [laughs] 21 00:00:42,607 --> 00:00:45,741 [Foreigner's "Hot Blooded"] 22 00:00:45,784 --> 00:00:48,744 [upbeat rock music] 23 00:00:48,787 --> 00:00:51,181 ♪ ♪ 24 00:00:51,225 --> 00:00:53,879 - ♪ Well, I'm hot blooded ♪ 25 00:00:53,923 --> 00:00:56,317 ♪ Check it and see ♪ 26 00:00:56,360 --> 00:01:00,103 ♪ I got a fever of a hundred and three ♪ 27 00:01:00,147 --> 00:01:02,758 ♪ I'm hot blooded ♪ 28 00:01:04,020 --> 00:01:07,415 [energetic country rock music] 29 00:01:07,458 --> 00:01:08,633 - Hey. 30 00:01:08,677 --> 00:01:11,158 ♪ ♪ 31 00:01:11,201 --> 00:01:13,203 - I guess I expected a firefighter's wake 32 00:01:13,247 --> 00:01:15,423 to be a more somber affair. - [cheers] 33 00:01:15,466 --> 00:01:17,207 - Yeah! - [laughs] 34 00:01:17,251 --> 00:01:20,254 - The raucousness all depends on how much you liked the guy. 35 00:01:20,297 --> 00:01:21,690 - And also on the seriousness 36 00:01:21,733 --> 00:01:23,474 or stupidity of the cause of death. 37 00:01:23,518 --> 00:01:24,910 You know what I mean? - I see. 38 00:01:24,954 --> 00:01:26,695 - But this'll be a rowdy one. 39 00:01:26,738 --> 00:01:27,826 - Ah, there you go. 40 00:01:27,870 --> 00:01:29,393 Now, that's how you take a death photo. 41 00:01:29,437 --> 00:01:30,612 That's a great pic! 42 00:01:30,655 --> 00:01:32,527 - Nice chin tilt, strong smile, 43 00:01:32,570 --> 00:01:34,529 always present, never goofy. 44 00:01:34,572 --> 00:01:36,226 - That's why they called him Smilin' Dutch Engles. 45 00:01:36,270 --> 00:01:37,575 [chuckles] Legend to the end. 46 00:01:37,619 --> 00:01:38,750 - Mm-hmm. - Cheap as hell though. 47 00:01:38,794 --> 00:01:40,230 - So cheap. - Oh. 48 00:01:40,274 --> 00:01:41,318 - Cheapskate. - Couldn't find his wallet. 49 00:01:41,362 --> 00:01:42,798 - Didn't have a wallet. 50 00:01:42,841 --> 00:01:44,147 But how do you make it 30 years on the job 51 00:01:44,191 --> 00:01:45,670 only to die such a dumb way? 52 00:01:45,714 --> 00:01:47,803 - He goes his whole career without a scratch, 53 00:01:47,846 --> 00:01:50,066 and he tries stomping branches down into a woodchipper 54 00:01:50,110 --> 00:01:51,633 with both feet? Stupid. 55 00:01:51,676 --> 00:01:52,982 - So dumb. So stupid. - Stupid. 56 00:01:53,025 --> 00:01:53,983 - Really dumb. - What a dingbat. 57 00:01:54,026 --> 00:01:55,289 - May he rest in peace. 58 00:01:55,332 --> 00:01:57,421 all: May he rest in peace. - Amen. 59 00:01:57,465 --> 00:01:59,684 - Let's hit the bar. All right, who needs one? 60 00:01:59,728 --> 00:02:01,730 [somber music] 61 00:02:01,773 --> 00:02:03,601 [sighs] 62 00:02:03,645 --> 00:02:06,300 There he is, the old bastard. [chuckles] 63 00:02:06,343 --> 00:02:08,389 He will be missed. - Oof. 64 00:02:08,432 --> 00:02:10,565 - That woodchipper really got the best of him, huh? 65 00:02:12,001 --> 00:02:13,437 - Classic cheapskate. 66 00:02:13,481 --> 00:02:15,483 You know, I bet he got half off on that casket. 67 00:02:15,526 --> 00:02:17,746 [laughter] - Come on. 68 00:02:17,789 --> 00:02:19,922 - Too soon, too soon. - You're right. 69 00:02:19,965 --> 00:02:22,838 [upbeat rock music] 70 00:02:22,881 --> 00:02:24,405 - My friend, can I have two bourbon shots 71 00:02:24,448 --> 00:02:25,710 and two more beers please? 72 00:02:25,754 --> 00:02:27,016 - Oh, you're starting strong, huh? 73 00:02:27,059 --> 00:02:28,365 - This is a wake. - True. 74 00:02:28,409 --> 00:02:29,801 I could use some food though. - Hey. 75 00:02:29,845 --> 00:02:31,499 - There's the kid. - Thank you, Mickleberry. 76 00:02:31,542 --> 00:02:33,196 - Sausage and peppers, huh? - Oh. 77 00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:34,328 [both chuckle] 78 00:02:34,371 --> 00:02:36,504 - Hey, a word of advice to you. 79 00:02:36,547 --> 00:02:38,114 Watch out for the old timers. 80 00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:39,376 - The drunker they get, 81 00:02:39,420 --> 00:02:40,943 the more they're gonna mess with you. 82 00:02:40,986 --> 00:02:42,640 - They can't be any rougher on me than you guys. 83 00:02:42,684 --> 00:02:44,686 - Oh, please, you have no idea 84 00:02:44,729 --> 00:02:46,905 how soft hazing has become since we were probies. 85 00:02:46,949 --> 00:02:48,646 - Yeah, we used to have our asses kicked 86 00:02:48,690 --> 00:02:49,865 every single day. 87 00:02:49,908 --> 00:02:51,910 We had one lieutenant who was brutal. 88 00:02:51,954 --> 00:02:53,782 - This guy hazed everybody. 89 00:02:53,825 --> 00:02:56,437 In fact, he went after the chief all the time. 90 00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:58,482 To this day, Terry's still scared of the guy. 91 00:02:58,526 --> 00:03:00,919 - Okay, that's ridiculous. - Oh, is it? 92 00:03:00,963 --> 00:03:03,357 Then how come your voice goes up two octaves 93 00:03:03,400 --> 00:03:05,533 at the mere mention of the name McSwiggins? 94 00:03:05,576 --> 00:03:06,882 - [high-pitched] You have no idea 95 00:03:06,925 --> 00:03:09,667 what you're talking about. - [laughs] 96 00:03:09,711 --> 00:03:11,495 - Okay, that was ages ago. 97 00:03:11,539 --> 00:03:13,541 He's long gone, and I'm totally over it. 98 00:03:13,584 --> 00:03:16,239 - If I eat any more sausage and pepper sandwiches, 99 00:03:16,283 --> 00:03:18,546 I'll be long gone. You feel me? 100 00:03:21,375 --> 00:03:23,942 - Those old timers are gonna chew you up and spit you out. 101 00:03:23,986 --> 00:03:25,422 - I'm afraid for you. 102 00:03:25,466 --> 00:03:27,381 Eat some bread. It'll soak up the alcohol. 103 00:03:27,424 --> 00:03:29,296 ♪ ♪ 104 00:03:29,339 --> 00:03:31,080 - Tonight, I'm gonna do it. - Do what? 105 00:03:31,123 --> 00:03:33,778 - I have always wanted to sing "Danny Boy" 106 00:03:33,822 --> 00:03:36,390 at a firefighter wake. - By yourself? 107 00:03:36,433 --> 00:03:37,826 - What's that supposed to mean? 108 00:03:37,869 --> 00:03:40,916 - Your singing voice is better in a crowd. 109 00:03:40,959 --> 00:03:43,745 - Oh, my singing is great. 110 00:03:43,788 --> 00:03:46,748 I'll put tears in every eye in this place. 111 00:03:46,791 --> 00:03:47,705 - Tears of agony. 112 00:03:47,749 --> 00:03:49,620 - Why are you being so bitchy? 113 00:03:49,664 --> 00:03:51,753 - Listen, Dutch ran our fantasy football league, right? 114 00:03:51,796 --> 00:03:53,624 Granny won this year, but Dutch died 115 00:03:53,668 --> 00:03:55,931 before he could pay him, so Granny's a little touchy. 116 00:03:55,974 --> 00:03:58,629 Isn't he? - Look at him. Smilin' Dutch. 117 00:03:58,673 --> 00:04:01,066 Cheapskate even in death. - Hey, come on, man. 118 00:04:01,110 --> 00:04:02,981 - Why don't you ask his widow for it? 119 00:04:03,025 --> 00:04:03,982 - Yeah, right. 120 00:04:04,026 --> 00:04:05,375 Oh, Mrs. Engels, so sorry 121 00:04:05,419 --> 00:04:06,768 to hear about your husband being mulch 122 00:04:06,811 --> 00:04:08,552 from the waist down, but I was wondering 123 00:04:08,596 --> 00:04:11,163 if you could, uh, pay that 1,000 bucks he owes me? 124 00:04:11,207 --> 00:04:12,426 [laughter] 125 00:04:12,469 --> 00:04:13,992 - My ears are burning. 126 00:04:14,036 --> 00:04:16,081 - Oh! - Oh, Ms. Engels. 127 00:04:16,125 --> 00:04:18,606 Ah, well, we were just talking about old Dutchy. 128 00:04:18,649 --> 00:04:21,043 Our condolences, by the way. Such a great, great guy. 129 00:04:21,086 --> 00:04:23,785 - Yeah, top of the line. - Thank you so much. 130 00:04:23,828 --> 00:04:25,787 - Oh, and we love the photos too, yeah? 131 00:04:25,830 --> 00:04:27,441 Such good memories. - Oh, yes. 132 00:04:27,484 --> 00:04:31,662 Dutch had so many great photos on his phone. 133 00:04:31,706 --> 00:04:34,056 Some of the pictures were not so appropriate... 134 00:04:34,099 --> 00:04:35,231 [laughs] 135 00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:37,320 But that's a firefighter for you. 136 00:04:37,364 --> 00:04:39,627 - Yeah. - [laughs] 137 00:04:39,670 --> 00:04:42,282 Please enjoy yourselves. 138 00:04:42,325 --> 00:04:44,719 Dutch would have wanted it that way. 139 00:04:44,762 --> 00:04:45,894 - Thanks so much. - All right. 140 00:04:45,937 --> 00:04:48,113 - That's it! - What? What? 141 00:04:48,157 --> 00:04:51,160 - She said the photos were coming off Dutch's phone. 142 00:04:51,203 --> 00:04:52,466 Did he have a Cashmo account? 143 00:04:52,509 --> 00:04:53,902 - That's how we paid our entry fee. 144 00:04:53,945 --> 00:04:55,164 - We just have to snatch his phone, 145 00:04:55,207 --> 00:04:56,600 and we'll get you your money. 146 00:04:56,644 --> 00:04:58,733 - Steal his phone and sell it. - No, Ike. 147 00:04:58,776 --> 00:05:00,300 - No! - Why would--sell his phone? 148 00:05:00,343 --> 00:05:02,780 - I'm not selling his--not-- what? 149 00:05:02,824 --> 00:05:09,396 ♪ ♪ 150 00:05:09,439 --> 00:05:10,701 - "As we remember Dutch, 151 00:05:10,745 --> 00:05:12,312 I begin with the Serenity Prayer." 152 00:05:12,355 --> 00:05:13,704 Really? - Okay. 153 00:05:13,748 --> 00:05:15,097 You mind your own business, all right? 154 00:05:15,140 --> 00:05:16,533 - Are you gonna use the notecards too? 155 00:05:16,577 --> 00:05:17,839 - I'm just gathering my thoughts. 156 00:05:17,882 --> 00:05:19,319 - Maybe you should sit this one out. 157 00:05:19,362 --> 00:05:21,016 - Dutch was my friend and my mentor. 158 00:05:21,059 --> 00:05:22,974 - I know, and you're good at a lot of things, 159 00:05:23,018 --> 00:05:24,846 but giving toasts is not one of them. 160 00:05:24,889 --> 00:05:27,544 No disrespect, but your toasts tend to be 161 00:05:27,588 --> 00:05:29,285 a little bit serious and kind of boring. 162 00:05:29,329 --> 00:05:32,027 - Well, not everyone wants to hear Andrew Dice Clay 163 00:05:32,070 --> 00:05:33,245 at their memorial service. 164 00:05:33,289 --> 00:05:34,856 - I am legendary at these things 165 00:05:34,899 --> 00:05:36,031 - Here we go. 166 00:05:36,074 --> 00:05:37,511 - I just happen to know the formula. 167 00:05:37,554 --> 00:05:39,077 First you open with a dirty joke, 168 00:05:39,121 --> 00:05:40,818 then you make fun of somebody in the crowd, 169 00:05:40,862 --> 00:05:42,951 then you tell a pandering story, 170 00:05:42,994 --> 00:05:45,214 and you land the whole thing with a sentimental close 171 00:05:45,257 --> 00:05:47,129 and you finish it all off by getting everyone 172 00:05:47,172 --> 00:05:49,871 in the room to drink. It's not rocket surgery. 173 00:05:49,914 --> 00:05:52,221 - Well, that may work for you, but there are plenty of people 174 00:05:52,264 --> 00:05:54,919 in this room who appreciate my toasting style. 175 00:05:54,963 --> 00:05:57,531 - Keep telling yourself that. - Hi, fellas. 176 00:05:57,574 --> 00:05:59,663 - Oh, Laura. 177 00:05:59,707 --> 00:06:02,492 How are you? - Laura, come here, Laura. 178 00:06:02,536 --> 00:06:03,841 - Oh, thank you, honey. 179 00:06:03,885 --> 00:06:05,321 - Please accept our deepest condolences. 180 00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:06,844 - I appreciate that. 181 00:06:06,888 --> 00:06:10,152 - But honestly, what the hell was Dutch doing 182 00:06:10,195 --> 00:06:11,327 jumping in a woodchipper? 183 00:06:11,371 --> 00:06:12,807 - [laughs] I know. 184 00:06:12,850 --> 00:06:14,678 I told him he needed to hire someone 185 00:06:14,722 --> 00:06:16,941 to mulch those branches, but-- 186 00:06:16,985 --> 00:06:19,727 well, at least he died doing what he loved. 187 00:06:19,770 --> 00:06:22,077 - Saving money. - [laughs] 188 00:06:22,120 --> 00:06:24,906 God, please say that in your toast. 189 00:06:24,949 --> 00:06:26,690 You are giving a toast, right? 190 00:06:26,734 --> 00:06:28,605 - Of course, I am. It's the least I can do. 191 00:06:28,649 --> 00:06:29,780 - [clears throat] 192 00:06:29,824 --> 00:06:31,216 Laura, I've also prepared a toast. 193 00:06:31,260 --> 00:06:33,567 - [laughs] 194 00:06:34,916 --> 00:06:37,658 That's so nice. 195 00:06:37,701 --> 00:06:42,053 Um, but don't feel like you have to, dearie. 196 00:06:42,097 --> 00:06:43,620 I mean-- - Come on. 197 00:06:43,664 --> 00:06:46,797 - You don't have to. - It's the least I could do. 198 00:06:46,841 --> 00:06:50,322 - Um, so I-- if you guys will excuse me. 199 00:06:50,366 --> 00:06:51,541 - Of course. 200 00:06:51,585 --> 00:06:52,847 - Well, great to see you, Laura. 201 00:06:52,890 --> 00:06:54,675 - [sighs] - She gets it. 202 00:06:54,718 --> 00:06:56,111 - She wants me to give a speech. 203 00:06:56,154 --> 00:06:57,591 - You're right, you're right. Absolutely. 204 00:06:57,634 --> 00:06:59,070 - Hey, you know what? 205 00:06:59,114 --> 00:07:01,072 My toast is gonna be the talk of the wake, 206 00:07:01,116 --> 00:07:02,378 and when I give it, 207 00:07:02,422 --> 00:07:03,771 you're gonna give me an apology. 208 00:07:03,814 --> 00:07:06,861 - Sure. - A dry, sincere apology. 209 00:07:06,904 --> 00:07:08,645 - You got it. - [whimpers] 210 00:07:08,689 --> 00:07:09,777 These old dudes are rough. 211 00:07:09,820 --> 00:07:11,039 Four of them tried to pants me 212 00:07:11,082 --> 00:07:12,519 and stick cocktail franks in my ear. 213 00:07:12,562 --> 00:07:13,781 - That sounds about right. 214 00:07:13,824 --> 00:07:15,347 - And another one in a wheelchair 215 00:07:15,391 --> 00:07:17,611 punched me in the kidney. - Did you say in the kidney? 216 00:07:17,654 --> 00:07:19,526 - Yeah. - There's only one guy I know 217 00:07:19,569 --> 00:07:20,831 who loves giving donkey punches. 218 00:07:20,875 --> 00:07:24,792 - [laughing] Well, well, well... 219 00:07:24,835 --> 00:07:28,448 if it isn't that little chicken shit toilet Terry. 220 00:07:28,491 --> 00:07:30,058 - [high-pitched] McSwiggins. 221 00:07:30,101 --> 00:07:31,146 What are you doing here? 222 00:07:32,495 --> 00:07:35,672 - I came to watch you make your lame-ass toast. 223 00:07:35,716 --> 00:07:37,369 - Awesome. [chuckles] 224 00:07:37,413 --> 00:07:41,461 ♪ ♪ 225 00:07:45,116 --> 00:07:46,553 - McSwiggins, I thought you moved to Florida. 226 00:07:46,596 --> 00:07:48,772 - I did. That was two hip replacements 227 00:07:48,816 --> 00:07:50,208 and three heart attacks ago. 228 00:07:50,252 --> 00:07:52,776 But I wasn't gonna miss Dutch's wake. 229 00:07:52,820 --> 00:07:54,517 - Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. 230 00:07:54,561 --> 00:07:56,258 - [imitates whimper] 231 00:07:56,301 --> 00:07:58,826 All these years, you're still a mealy-mouthed milquetoast. 232 00:07:58,869 --> 00:08:00,175 - And after all these years, 233 00:08:00,218 --> 00:08:02,090 you're still a loudmouthed windbag. 234 00:08:02,133 --> 00:08:05,485 Is that thing electric, or does it run on hot air? 235 00:08:08,096 --> 00:08:10,402 - [laughs] 236 00:08:10,446 --> 00:08:12,317 You still got it, Penis Eye. 237 00:08:12,361 --> 00:08:13,667 - Oh, Penis Eye. Here we go. 238 00:08:13,710 --> 00:08:15,495 - How is it you're just a captain, 239 00:08:15,538 --> 00:08:18,367 and Toilet Terry's a chief? 240 00:08:18,410 --> 00:08:22,676 Terry, you been sleeping with Eddie's sister and his dad? 241 00:08:22,719 --> 00:08:25,156 [laughter] 242 00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:27,811 I'll bet Terry's big tummy is acting up 243 00:08:27,855 --> 00:08:30,161 something fierce right now. 244 00:08:30,205 --> 00:08:33,121 You know, back when your chief was a probie, 245 00:08:33,164 --> 00:08:35,776 and I use my quotation marks mockingly... 246 00:08:35,819 --> 00:08:37,734 - Figured. - Every call we got, 247 00:08:37,778 --> 00:08:40,084 he had to take a nervous shit. 248 00:08:40,128 --> 00:08:42,347 You'd be in a burning building, break down a door, 249 00:08:42,391 --> 00:08:45,786 only to find this guy perched on the shitter. 250 00:08:45,829 --> 00:08:46,961 - That happened once. 251 00:08:47,004 --> 00:08:48,266 - Maybe twice. - Just once. 252 00:08:48,310 --> 00:08:50,007 - But that's how you got your nickname, 253 00:08:50,051 --> 00:08:51,531 Toilet Terry. 254 00:08:51,574 --> 00:08:53,881 Word of advice for you, meat. 255 00:08:53,924 --> 00:08:57,406 Whatever order he gives you, do the opposite. 256 00:08:57,449 --> 00:09:01,584 Looking forward to your sincere toast there, 257 00:09:01,628 --> 00:09:03,368 Toilet Terry. 258 00:09:03,412 --> 00:09:04,848 Donkey punch! - Oh, jeez. 259 00:09:04,892 --> 00:09:07,024 - Oh, boy, okay. - I'm going to the salad bar. 260 00:09:07,068 --> 00:09:08,373 - Yeah, great. - Donkey punch! 261 00:09:08,417 --> 00:09:09,723 - Oh, God. - Okay. 262 00:09:09,766 --> 00:09:11,768 One for the road, right? - There you go. 263 00:09:11,812 --> 00:09:13,161 - That's great. 264 00:09:13,204 --> 00:09:14,466 Hey, it's good seeing you, McSwiggins. 265 00:09:14,510 --> 00:09:17,034 [upbeat rock music] 266 00:09:17,078 --> 00:09:18,558 ♪ ♪ 267 00:09:18,601 --> 00:09:21,125 - We need to switch Dutch's phone out with another one 268 00:09:21,169 --> 00:09:23,737 so the slideshow doesn't stop. Ike, hand me your phone. 269 00:09:23,780 --> 00:09:25,042 People are gonna notice the switch, though, 270 00:09:25,086 --> 00:09:26,000 don't you think? 271 00:09:26,043 --> 00:09:27,392 - We just need a distraction. 272 00:09:27,436 --> 00:09:28,524 - How about I sing "Danny Boy"? 273 00:09:28,568 --> 00:09:30,004 - That's not a distraction. 274 00:09:30,047 --> 00:09:31,745 People love to stop and look at a car crash. 275 00:09:31,788 --> 00:09:33,355 - What is that supposed to mean? 276 00:09:33,398 --> 00:09:34,835 - You know what it's supposed to mean. 277 00:09:34,878 --> 00:09:36,184 You can't sing. - No, no. 278 00:09:36,227 --> 00:09:37,751 It just means we need a different type 279 00:09:37,794 --> 00:09:39,187 of distraction, that's all. 280 00:09:39,230 --> 00:09:41,493 - Fine, go, assholes. 281 00:09:41,537 --> 00:09:42,799 To Dutch! 282 00:09:42,843 --> 00:09:45,410 [all cheering] 283 00:09:45,454 --> 00:09:47,412 [all chanting "Dutch"] 284 00:09:47,456 --> 00:09:48,762 - Yeah, to Dutch! 285 00:09:50,067 --> 00:09:51,329 - Now we just have to put in 286 00:09:51,373 --> 00:09:53,070 every four-digit combo imaginable. 287 00:09:53,114 --> 00:09:55,507 - Ooh! Uh, 6-9-6-9. 288 00:09:55,551 --> 00:09:57,074 - Okay. No. 289 00:09:57,118 --> 00:09:58,815 - D-I-C-K. - [chuckles] 290 00:09:58,859 --> 00:10:00,556 - You know how to do the letters for the numbers? 291 00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:01,992 - You guys, let's see if we can get in using voice command. 292 00:10:02,036 --> 00:10:03,603 - Oh, yeah, voice command. - Ooh. 293 00:10:03,646 --> 00:10:05,343 - [strange Polish accent] Hmm, uh, hey, this is Dutch. 294 00:10:05,387 --> 00:10:08,912 Uh, Dutch Engels. Yeah, this is my phone. 295 00:10:08,956 --> 00:10:10,958 And, uh, please open the phone for me 296 00:10:11,001 --> 00:10:13,134 because my name is Dutch. - Is that Polish? 297 00:10:13,177 --> 00:10:14,788 I thought Dutch was from Chicago. 298 00:10:14,831 --> 00:10:16,354 - Yeah, Chicago has the highest concentration 299 00:10:16,398 --> 00:10:19,096 of Polish people in the U.S. God, look it up, Lucy. 300 00:10:19,140 --> 00:10:21,142 - [Jamaican accent] Open up the phone, won't ya? 301 00:10:21,185 --> 00:10:22,970 Don't ya know? Lord-a-mercy. 302 00:10:23,013 --> 00:10:25,102 Ya got to legalize it! - Try another one. 303 00:10:25,146 --> 00:10:26,364 You gotta try 'em all. Who knows? 304 00:10:26,408 --> 00:10:28,149 You never know. 305 00:10:28,192 --> 00:10:30,151 - Ike, why do you have so many beefcake photos on your phone? 306 00:10:30,194 --> 00:10:32,501 - Ah, they're just for my portfolio. 307 00:10:32,544 --> 00:10:34,372 Don't worry about it. People won't notice it. 308 00:10:34,416 --> 00:10:37,332 - Uh, Dutch sure does have a lot of beefcake photos 309 00:10:37,375 --> 00:10:39,247 of Ike on his phone. 310 00:10:39,290 --> 00:10:42,990 - Dutch was a complicated man. I tried not to ask questions. 311 00:10:43,033 --> 00:10:44,078 - Hmm. 312 00:10:45,253 --> 00:10:47,168 - You guys, this isn't working. 313 00:10:47,211 --> 00:10:49,344 We need to use Dutch's thumbprint to unlock it. 314 00:10:49,387 --> 00:10:50,780 - Ah, I wish Dutch was just here, 315 00:10:50,824 --> 00:10:51,912 and we could just use his thumbprint 316 00:10:51,955 --> 00:10:53,174 and get this over with. 317 00:10:54,436 --> 00:10:55,393 - [gasps] 318 00:10:55,437 --> 00:10:56,917 ♪ ♪ 319 00:10:56,960 --> 00:10:58,570 - Hey, Robertson, put your shirt on! 320 00:10:58,614 --> 00:10:59,833 - He looks like Austin Powers. 321 00:10:59,876 --> 00:11:01,312 - Go shave his back, Mickleberry. 322 00:11:01,356 --> 00:11:02,531 - No, I don't want to. - Hey, that's the chief. 323 00:11:02,574 --> 00:11:04,011 You have to do what he says. 324 00:11:04,054 --> 00:11:05,577 - And get me a sausage and pepper sandwich 325 00:11:05,621 --> 00:11:06,796 while you're there. - Oh, man. 326 00:11:06,840 --> 00:11:08,145 I think it's time to do the toasts. 327 00:11:08,189 --> 00:11:09,625 You still in? - Yeah, I'm in. 328 00:11:09,669 --> 00:11:11,627 I will not be bullied into silence 329 00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:13,716 by a 70-year-old man in a wheelchair. 330 00:11:13,760 --> 00:11:15,152 Right? - Yeah. 331 00:11:15,196 --> 00:11:16,937 - Oh, do me a favor. Follow the formula. 332 00:11:16,980 --> 00:11:18,939 It's simple: dirty joke, 333 00:11:18,982 --> 00:11:20,636 make fun of someone in the crowd, 334 00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:22,290 pandering story, sentimental finish, 335 00:11:22,333 --> 00:11:25,510 everyone drinks. - I have my own formula. 336 00:11:25,554 --> 00:11:26,860 - It's your funeral. 337 00:11:26,903 --> 00:11:28,165 - Actually, it's Dutch's funeral. 338 00:11:28,209 --> 00:11:29,906 - No, actually, it's Dutch's wake. 339 00:11:29,950 --> 00:11:31,342 Go ahead and give a toast. It'll be your wake. 340 00:11:31,386 --> 00:11:32,648 Excuse me. 341 00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:34,215 - What the hell does he mean by that? 342 00:11:34,258 --> 00:11:36,783 - Excuse me, if I could just have everyone's attention 343 00:11:36,826 --> 00:11:38,393 for just a second. 344 00:11:38,436 --> 00:11:41,178 Before all of you animals polish off the free booze... 345 00:11:41,222 --> 00:11:42,397 [laughter] 346 00:11:42,440 --> 00:11:44,878 It's time to remember Dutch. - To Dutch. 347 00:11:44,921 --> 00:11:46,880 - To Dutch. - To Dutch. 348 00:11:46,923 --> 00:11:49,796 Laura, my deepest heartfelt condolences. 349 00:11:49,839 --> 00:11:51,406 You lost your better half, but really, 350 00:11:51,449 --> 00:11:52,799 you've lost Dutch's better half. 351 00:11:52,842 --> 00:11:54,801 [laughter] 352 00:11:54,844 --> 00:11:56,628 We all showered with the guy. We know. 353 00:11:56,672 --> 00:11:57,978 [laughter] 354 00:11:58,021 --> 00:11:59,893 Wait, Fensterman, why are you laughing? 355 00:11:59,936 --> 00:12:01,155 We've showered with you too. 356 00:12:01,198 --> 00:12:02,678 [laughter] 357 00:12:02,722 --> 00:12:05,550 If Dutch taught us anything, it's that life is short, 358 00:12:05,594 --> 00:12:06,551 but so is Fensterman. 359 00:12:06,595 --> 00:12:07,814 [laughter] 360 00:12:07,857 --> 00:12:10,904 ♪ ♪ 361 00:12:10,947 --> 00:12:13,776 [somber music] 362 00:12:13,820 --> 00:12:15,125 - Oh, sweet Dutcharoo. 363 00:12:15,169 --> 00:12:17,780 - Dutch, why did they do it to you? 364 00:12:17,824 --> 00:12:19,129 [fake sobbing] - Okay, hey. 365 00:12:21,262 --> 00:12:23,220 - [whispers] Distraction. 366 00:12:23,264 --> 00:12:24,265 - [snaps] 367 00:12:25,440 --> 00:12:28,051 - [clears throat] Oh, hey, hey, fellas, 368 00:12:28,095 --> 00:12:30,401 uh, it's 9:30. Honor guard ended at 9:00. 369 00:12:30,445 --> 00:12:32,186 Chief McConky told us to tell you you can go. 370 00:12:32,229 --> 00:12:34,275 Yeah, yeah, we'll get out of your way so you can, uh... 371 00:12:42,239 --> 00:12:43,458 [laughter] 372 00:12:43,501 --> 00:12:45,590 - One story comes to mind when I think 373 00:12:45,634 --> 00:12:47,331 about Smilin' Dutch Engels, 374 00:12:47,375 --> 00:12:49,899 the St. Patrick's Day parade of 2002. 375 00:12:49,943 --> 00:12:51,292 [laughter] 376 00:12:51,335 --> 00:12:52,728 Dutch drank enough green beer 377 00:12:52,772 --> 00:12:53,947 to kill a village of leprechauns. 378 00:12:53,990 --> 00:12:55,818 [laughter] 379 00:12:57,167 --> 00:12:58,908 - Okay. 380 00:12:58,952 --> 00:13:00,867 Get his finger-- - I got it. 381 00:13:00,910 --> 00:13:02,956 Here we go. 382 00:13:02,999 --> 00:13:04,261 Come on, let's go. 383 00:13:04,305 --> 00:13:05,959 - Come on, hurry up. - What the-- 384 00:13:06,002 --> 00:13:07,308 - Whoa. 385 00:13:07,351 --> 00:13:08,788 All the years I've known Dutch, 386 00:13:08,831 --> 00:13:09,963 I didn't know he had a fake hand. 387 00:13:10,006 --> 00:13:11,268 - What? - Ugh. 388 00:13:11,312 --> 00:13:14,054 - Okay, I'll just-- sorry, Dutch. 389 00:13:15,577 --> 00:13:18,580 Are you kidding me? - Two fake hands? 390 00:13:18,623 --> 00:13:19,973 You think you know a guy. 391 00:13:20,016 --> 00:13:21,670 - He clearly lost them in the accident. 392 00:13:21,713 --> 00:13:25,152 - I know, but I was like, "That's--that's crazy." 393 00:13:25,195 --> 00:13:27,023 - What do we do know? - Face ID. 394 00:13:27,067 --> 00:13:28,938 - Brilliant. - Yeah. 395 00:13:28,982 --> 00:13:33,421 - Yes, we gave Dutch shit about being cheap, 396 00:13:33,464 --> 00:13:35,989 but he passed that boot around every day 397 00:13:36,032 --> 00:13:39,166 to raise money for that children's hospital 398 00:13:39,209 --> 00:13:41,777 in Holland, and the amazing thing is, 399 00:13:41,821 --> 00:13:44,867 he wasn't even Dutch. 400 00:13:44,911 --> 00:13:46,042 [loud sobbing] 401 00:13:46,086 --> 00:13:47,348 Here's to Dutch! 402 00:13:47,391 --> 00:13:49,480 all: To Dutch! - Here's to Dutch. 403 00:13:49,524 --> 00:13:50,481 - To Dutch! 404 00:13:50,525 --> 00:13:53,528 [applause] 405 00:13:56,357 --> 00:13:58,011 - Thank you. - Yes, bravo, Eddie! 406 00:13:58,054 --> 00:13:59,664 - It ain't rocket surgery. 407 00:13:59,708 --> 00:14:03,146 [upbeat rock music] 408 00:14:04,887 --> 00:14:06,367 - Guys, Uncle Eddie's done. 409 00:14:06,410 --> 00:14:07,629 People are gonna start trickling in here soon. 410 00:14:07,672 --> 00:14:09,022 - Okay, okay. 411 00:14:09,065 --> 00:14:10,023 - I'm gonna go out there and sing "Danny Boy" 412 00:14:10,066 --> 00:14:11,024 and distract 'em. 413 00:14:11,067 --> 00:14:12,547 - No! - Stop. 414 00:14:12,590 --> 00:14:13,983 You don't gotta do that. - Please don't do that. 415 00:14:14,027 --> 00:14:15,202 - Yeah, that's fine. - Hurry up then. 416 00:14:15,245 --> 00:14:16,638 - All right. - Come on, Granny. 417 00:14:16,681 --> 00:14:18,988 - It's not working. Oh, make him smile. 418 00:14:19,032 --> 00:14:22,383 - Of course, Smilin' Dutch. Yes. 419 00:14:22,426 --> 00:14:23,514 ♪ ♪ 420 00:14:23,558 --> 00:14:25,777 Okay. 421 00:14:25,821 --> 00:14:30,391 All right, Dutchman. Smile, you son of a bitch. 422 00:14:30,434 --> 00:14:31,305 ♪ ♪ 423 00:14:31,348 --> 00:14:33,394 - Come on, man, bigger. 424 00:14:33,437 --> 00:14:35,831 - This is as big as it goes. - Make him stretch out. 425 00:14:35,875 --> 00:14:36,832 He's dead. 426 00:14:36,876 --> 00:14:39,226 ♪ ♪ 427 00:14:39,269 --> 00:14:41,576 - We're going to hell for this. You know that, right? 428 00:14:41,619 --> 00:14:43,708 ♪ ♪ 429 00:14:43,752 --> 00:14:45,493 - Oh! [fake sobbing] 430 00:14:45,536 --> 00:14:48,496 - Damn you, Dutch! - [fake sobbing] 431 00:14:48,539 --> 00:14:50,802 - We just wanted to see him smile one last time! 432 00:14:50,846 --> 00:14:52,326 That's all. Five minutes. 433 00:14:52,369 --> 00:14:54,458 We need five minutes alone. I'm so sorry. 434 00:14:54,502 --> 00:14:55,459 ♪ ♪ 435 00:14:55,503 --> 00:14:56,765 He had no hands! 436 00:14:56,808 --> 00:14:58,245 [laughter] 437 00:14:58,288 --> 00:15:01,161 - Take it from a sad, old guy in a wheelchair, 438 00:15:01,204 --> 00:15:03,641 Dutch was larger than life. 439 00:15:03,685 --> 00:15:07,036 To Dutch, a man who never half-assed anything 440 00:15:07,080 --> 00:15:08,081 until now. 441 00:15:08,124 --> 00:15:09,865 [laughter] 442 00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:10,997 To Dutch! 443 00:15:11,040 --> 00:15:13,129 - To Dutch! - To Dutch. 444 00:15:13,173 --> 00:15:15,262 - Wow, he just pulled off the joke finish 445 00:15:15,305 --> 00:15:17,220 on top of a wheelchair sympathy beat. 446 00:15:17,264 --> 00:15:20,441 That's called a treacle-cutter. Upper level stuff. 447 00:15:20,484 --> 00:15:21,964 - I think you might want to wait a while. 448 00:15:22,008 --> 00:15:23,183 You don't want to follow that Terry. 449 00:15:23,226 --> 00:15:24,836 - Really? - Let's get another beer. 450 00:15:24,880 --> 00:15:26,186 - Okay. - And now, 451 00:15:26,229 --> 00:15:28,101 if any of you need to hit the john, 452 00:15:28,144 --> 00:15:30,233 this is a good time 453 00:15:30,277 --> 00:15:32,366 'cause I'm about to turn it over 454 00:15:32,409 --> 00:15:37,197 to the worst toast giver in the history of the TFD. 455 00:15:37,240 --> 00:15:40,852 Toilet Terry McConky! 456 00:15:40,896 --> 00:15:43,159 [chuckles] - What? 457 00:15:43,203 --> 00:15:45,553 - All right, Terry McConky. Whoo! 458 00:15:45,596 --> 00:15:46,902 - Thank you, everyone, thank you. 459 00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:48,251 - Yeah, yeah, whoo! 460 00:15:48,295 --> 00:15:50,166 - Good luck following me, toilet boy. 461 00:15:50,210 --> 00:15:52,081 [laughs] - Okay. That's great. 462 00:15:52,125 --> 00:15:53,213 - Thank you. - He loves that. 463 00:15:53,256 --> 00:15:54,431 - [clears throat] 464 00:15:54,475 --> 00:15:56,607 Thank you, Buddy McSwiggins. 465 00:15:58,696 --> 00:16:02,526 "Webster's Dictionary" defines the word hero 466 00:16:02,570 --> 00:16:06,269 as any person of great strength or courage. 467 00:16:06,313 --> 00:16:08,402 - Who needs one? On me! 468 00:16:09,272 --> 00:16:10,621 - Keep--keep going. 469 00:16:10,665 --> 00:16:12,493 I'm just gonna run to-- - But I-- 470 00:16:12,536 --> 00:16:13,798 I was just-- - I'll be right back. 471 00:16:13,842 --> 00:16:16,192 [indistinct chatter] 472 00:16:16,236 --> 00:16:19,195 - But seriously... 473 00:16:19,239 --> 00:16:20,936 [clears throat] We all loved Dutch 474 00:16:20,980 --> 00:16:22,982 very mulch-- [chuckles] 475 00:16:23,025 --> 00:16:24,679 I mean much. I meant much. 476 00:16:24,722 --> 00:16:27,160 - Oh, whoa, did you just do a mulch joke 477 00:16:27,203 --> 00:16:29,205 about a man who died in a woodchipper? 478 00:16:29,249 --> 00:16:31,164 Real class act, McConky. 479 00:16:31,207 --> 00:16:34,732 - Hold on a second. Okay, wait. 480 00:16:34,776 --> 00:16:36,343 All right. [chuckles] 481 00:16:36,386 --> 00:16:39,694 Abraham Lincoln once said... - [groans] 482 00:16:39,737 --> 00:16:43,611 - "If a man is late for his own party..." 483 00:16:49,008 --> 00:16:51,793 Fuck this. - Oh, there he goes. 484 00:16:51,836 --> 00:16:55,101 Toilet Terry! - [sighs] 485 00:16:58,582 --> 00:17:00,019 - Terry, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 486 00:17:00,062 --> 00:17:01,672 Terry, if you slink off right now, 487 00:17:01,716 --> 00:17:03,457 you will never live this down. - I'm not slinking off. 488 00:17:03,500 --> 00:17:04,632 I gotta go. 489 00:17:04,675 --> 00:17:07,417 Vicky wants me to pick up some avocados. 490 00:17:07,461 --> 00:17:08,940 - Forget about that toast. 491 00:17:08,984 --> 00:17:10,507 You did it. It sucked. 492 00:17:10,551 --> 00:17:13,206 I told you it would, but now you gotta stand up 493 00:17:13,249 --> 00:17:15,730 to that guy once and for all. - Hey, Chief. 494 00:17:15,773 --> 00:17:18,472 I really enjoyed your toast. It seemed very sincere. 495 00:17:18,515 --> 00:17:20,082 I hope that guy didn't upset you. 496 00:17:20,126 --> 00:17:21,866 - Oh. [chuckles] 497 00:17:21,910 --> 00:17:23,390 Now I heard everything. 498 00:17:23,433 --> 00:17:25,870 You got the probie caring about your feelings? 499 00:17:25,914 --> 00:17:27,829 Now you're teaching the next generation 500 00:17:27,872 --> 00:17:31,267 of firefighters to be a bunch of soy boy beta cucks like you. 501 00:17:31,311 --> 00:17:32,747 Come here, probie. 502 00:17:32,790 --> 00:17:34,618 Let me give you a little donkey punch, huh? 503 00:17:34,662 --> 00:17:36,490 - Leave him alone, McSwiggins. - You know what? 504 00:17:36,533 --> 00:17:39,014 He might be softer than you, Toilet Terry, huh? 505 00:17:39,058 --> 00:17:40,581 - Leave him alone! 506 00:17:40,624 --> 00:17:43,323 - Oh, the hell are you gonna do about it? 507 00:17:43,366 --> 00:17:45,455 Don't make me kick your ass from this chair. 508 00:17:45,499 --> 00:17:47,327 - [grunts] - Oh! 509 00:17:47,370 --> 00:17:49,677 - Give it your best shot, asshole. 510 00:17:49,720 --> 00:17:51,983 - Whoa, whoa, when I said stand up to the guy, 511 00:17:52,027 --> 00:17:54,290 I didn't mean sucker punch an old man in a wheelchair. 512 00:17:54,334 --> 00:17:56,727 This might not be the flex you're looking for. 513 00:17:56,771 --> 00:17:58,294 Oh, oh! 514 00:17:58,338 --> 00:18:00,949 - Who the hell you calling an old man, Penis Eye? 515 00:18:00,992 --> 00:18:02,690 Game on! - [screams] 516 00:18:02,733 --> 00:18:05,475 [somber music] 517 00:18:05,519 --> 00:18:07,260 - We need another distraction. 518 00:18:08,652 --> 00:18:10,306 - Guys, come quick, Chief is fighting 519 00:18:10,350 --> 00:18:12,308 that old timer in the wheelchair. 520 00:18:12,352 --> 00:18:14,354 - [quietly] Yes! 521 00:18:14,397 --> 00:18:16,530 Oh, yes. - Wait, this is our chance. 522 00:18:16,573 --> 00:18:18,140 - No, we gotta go watch that fight. 523 00:18:18,184 --> 00:18:19,620 - This is a firefighter's wake. 524 00:18:19,663 --> 00:18:21,100 That's just the first fight of the night. 525 00:18:21,143 --> 00:18:22,492 - True. - Yeah, you're right, okay. 526 00:18:22,536 --> 00:18:25,191 [upbeat rock music] 527 00:18:25,234 --> 00:18:27,541 - Hey, let's try facial recognition again. 528 00:18:27,584 --> 00:18:28,803 - Man, I don't think I can make his smile 529 00:18:28,846 --> 00:18:30,587 any bigger than I did last time. 530 00:18:30,631 --> 00:18:32,111 - What about the eyes? Maybe we gotta see the eyes. 531 00:18:32,154 --> 00:18:33,938 - Yes, thank you. - Okay. 532 00:18:33,982 --> 00:18:36,506 ♪ ♪ 533 00:18:36,550 --> 00:18:39,596 - What on earth? What are you doing? 534 00:18:39,640 --> 00:18:41,642 - Paying our last respects, saying goodbye. 535 00:18:41,685 --> 00:18:44,471 - You're the young man in all those racy photos 536 00:18:44,514 --> 00:18:47,952 on Dutch's phone. - Uh, yes, ma'am. 537 00:18:47,996 --> 00:18:50,868 - Eh, I learned a long time ago to not ask questions 538 00:18:50,912 --> 00:18:54,307 about what firefighters do, so shh. 539 00:18:54,350 --> 00:18:55,569 [all chuckle softly] 540 00:18:57,136 --> 00:18:59,268 - Sorry for your loss. - So sorry. 541 00:18:59,312 --> 00:19:01,966 Let's see those eyes. - Peek-a-boo, Dutcharoo. 542 00:19:02,010 --> 00:19:03,925 - [chuckles] 543 00:19:03,968 --> 00:19:05,318 [screams] Oh, God. 544 00:19:05,361 --> 00:19:06,580 Okay, that is it! 545 00:19:06,623 --> 00:19:08,016 It's not worth 1,000 bucks 546 00:19:08,059 --> 00:19:09,452 to have these nightmares for the rest of my life. 547 00:19:09,496 --> 00:19:10,714 - Yeah, let's go watch Dad 548 00:19:10,758 --> 00:19:11,976 fight the guy in the wheelchair. 549 00:19:12,020 --> 00:19:14,370 - Yeah, okay. - Oh! 550 00:19:14,414 --> 00:19:18,766 ♪ ♪ 551 00:19:18,809 --> 00:19:21,377 - Come on, big boy. 552 00:19:21,421 --> 00:19:22,726 - Oh. - Whoa! 553 00:19:22,770 --> 00:19:25,033 - Oh, knocked him on his ass, Terry. 554 00:19:25,076 --> 00:19:27,905 - Hard to feel good about that. - Give me a beer. 555 00:19:27,949 --> 00:19:30,995 ♪ ♪ 556 00:19:31,039 --> 00:19:32,345 - Chief! 557 00:19:33,694 --> 00:19:35,522 - You had enough yet, Toilet Terry? 558 00:19:35,565 --> 00:19:39,134 Somewhere up there, Smilin' Dutch ain't smiling. 559 00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:41,180 If he was here now-- - Oh! 560 00:19:41,223 --> 00:19:43,530 - If Dutch was here right now, the first thing he'd do 561 00:19:43,573 --> 00:19:45,575 is get you a fresh colostomy bag 562 00:19:45,619 --> 00:19:47,186 'cause you're full of shit! 563 00:19:47,229 --> 00:19:48,709 - Not bad. Kind of a dirty joke. 564 00:19:48,752 --> 00:19:51,102 - I don't shit in no bag. - [grunts] 565 00:19:51,146 --> 00:19:53,017 - [laughs] - That's it. 566 00:19:53,061 --> 00:19:54,584 [straining] 567 00:19:54,628 --> 00:19:55,846 [all gasp] - What? 568 00:19:55,890 --> 00:19:57,413 - Holy sheep shit. 569 00:19:57,457 --> 00:20:00,111 - Chief slapped him so hard his legs work again. 570 00:20:00,155 --> 00:20:02,592 - You were full of shit. - So what? 571 00:20:02,636 --> 00:20:04,681 My wheelchair sympathy was great for the toast, 572 00:20:04,725 --> 00:20:07,336 but I'm gonna throw that away so I can kick your ass. 573 00:20:07,380 --> 00:20:08,990 - Fensterman, once again, 574 00:20:09,033 --> 00:20:10,861 you're the shortest guy in the room. 575 00:20:10,905 --> 00:20:11,862 [laughter] 576 00:20:11,906 --> 00:20:13,386 - Okay, he's doing it. 577 00:20:13,429 --> 00:20:14,952 Dirty joke, then zing somebody in the crowd. 578 00:20:14,996 --> 00:20:18,652 - McSwiggins, I'm not gonna let you ruin Dutch's day. 579 00:20:18,695 --> 00:20:21,394 When I was a probie and you used to ride me, 580 00:20:21,437 --> 00:20:23,047 he would tell me not to listen to you 581 00:20:23,091 --> 00:20:24,310 because you were a bully, 582 00:20:24,353 --> 00:20:25,963 and bullies aren't worth the effort. 583 00:20:27,487 --> 00:20:29,010 - Oh! - Yeah, Chief! 584 00:20:29,053 --> 00:20:30,316 - Nice one, Chiefy. 585 00:20:30,359 --> 00:20:31,926 - He also told me I was a good firefighter 586 00:20:31,969 --> 00:20:34,407 and that one day, I could be a great chief. 587 00:20:34,450 --> 00:20:35,799 He believed in me, 588 00:20:35,843 --> 00:20:37,627 which makes him a better man than you. 589 00:20:37,671 --> 00:20:40,326 - Pandering story, very nice. 590 00:20:40,369 --> 00:20:42,763 - Oh! - [groans] 591 00:20:42,806 --> 00:20:46,506 - And that's why Dutch deserves to be praised here tonight. 592 00:20:47,942 --> 00:20:49,073 Donkey punch! 593 00:20:49,117 --> 00:20:51,075 [all cheer] - Donkey punch! 594 00:20:51,119 --> 00:20:53,339 - So let's all raise a glass... 595 00:20:54,165 --> 00:20:56,690 To Dutch! - To Dutch! 596 00:20:56,733 --> 00:20:58,953 - [chuckles] 597 00:20:58,996 --> 00:21:01,869 - Sentimental finish, everyone drinks. 598 00:21:01,912 --> 00:21:05,742 Wow, Terry, that may have been the most legendary wake toast 599 00:21:05,786 --> 00:21:07,178 of all time. 600 00:21:07,222 --> 00:21:10,312 You hit all the points all while kicking the ass 601 00:21:10,356 --> 00:21:13,315 of a senior citizen who was faking being in a wheelchair. 602 00:21:13,359 --> 00:21:14,925 Well done. - Thank you. 603 00:21:14,969 --> 00:21:17,363 - But now we gotta get this wake back on the rails. 604 00:21:17,406 --> 00:21:18,712 - [clearing throat] 605 00:21:18,755 --> 00:21:21,497 [off pitch] ♪ Oh, Danny boy ♪ 606 00:21:21,541 --> 00:21:26,546 ♪ The pipes, the pipes are calling ♪ 607 00:21:30,854 --> 00:21:34,249 [together] ♪ From glen to glen ♪ 608 00:21:34,293 --> 00:21:39,689 ♪ And down the mountainside ♪ 609 00:21:39,733 --> 00:21:43,171 ♪ For summer's gone ♪ 610 00:21:43,214 --> 00:21:48,307 ♪ And all the roses dying ♪ 611 00:21:48,350 --> 00:21:51,788 ♪ 'Tis you, 'tis you ♪ 612 00:21:51,832 --> 00:21:57,098 ♪ Must go and I must bide ♪ 613 00:21:57,141 --> 00:22:00,667 ♪ And I'll be here ♪ 614 00:22:00,710 --> 00:22:06,325 ♪ In sunshine or in shadow ♪ 615 00:22:06,368 --> 00:22:11,155 ♪ Oh, Danny boy, oh, Danny boy ♪ 616 00:22:11,199 --> 00:22:16,160 ♪ I love you so ♪ 617 00:22:16,204 --> 00:22:17,901 - To Dutch! - To Dutch! 618 00:22:21,514 --> 00:22:25,735 [laughter] 619 00:22:25,779 --> 00:22:27,955 - Tell you what, it was a hell of a speech, McConky. 620 00:22:27,998 --> 00:22:29,870 - Thank you very much, Mr. McSwiggins. 621 00:22:29,913 --> 00:22:31,785 And thank you for being my punching bag. 622 00:22:31,828 --> 00:22:34,353 - It was my pleasure. [laughs] 623 00:22:34,396 --> 00:22:37,094 I'll tell you what, your speech was a hell of a lot better 624 00:22:37,138 --> 00:22:40,707 than Penisi's toast. - Be careful, McSwiggins. 625 00:22:40,750 --> 00:22:42,535 I'll put you in that wheelchair for real. 626 00:22:42,578 --> 00:22:45,189 - Hey, you know what? Here's to Dutch! 627 00:22:45,233 --> 00:22:47,191 - Hey, Dutch! all: To Dutch! 628 00:22:47,235 --> 00:22:50,151 - I guess we oughta switch Ike and Dutch's phones back. 629 00:22:50,194 --> 00:22:52,414 No point in keeping a phone that I can't unlock. 630 00:22:52,458 --> 00:22:54,242 [phone clicks] Oh. 631 00:22:54,285 --> 00:22:56,200 Holy shit! You guys. 632 00:22:56,244 --> 00:22:57,593 - What the hell? 633 00:22:58,725 --> 00:23:00,944 - [laughs] - Of course. 634 00:23:00,988 --> 00:23:03,033 Why didn't we think of the death photo before? 635 00:23:03,077 --> 00:23:05,122 - Oh, my gosh. Open up the Cashmo, bro. 636 00:23:05,166 --> 00:23:07,647 - I'm trying to find it. - Oh, put it away, put it away. 637 00:23:07,690 --> 00:23:09,126 - Granny. - Oh! 638 00:23:09,170 --> 00:23:12,216 - I almost forgot, I have the cash you won 639 00:23:12,260 --> 00:23:14,262 in the fantasy football pool. 640 00:23:14,305 --> 00:23:15,698 Dutch may have been cheap, 641 00:23:15,742 --> 00:23:17,918 but he always honored people's winnings. 642 00:23:17,961 --> 00:23:20,442 - Laura, girl, that thousand bucks 643 00:23:20,486 --> 00:23:22,662 barely crossed my mind, right? - Yeah. 644 00:23:22,705 --> 00:23:24,141 He wasn't saying anything about it. 645 00:23:24,185 --> 00:23:25,882 We were like-- - He never brought it up. 646 00:23:25,926 --> 00:23:28,842 - Dutch actually had the cash in his pocket 647 00:23:28,885 --> 00:23:31,714 when he lost the battle with the woodchipper. 648 00:23:31,758 --> 00:23:34,848 - What the hell? - He was such a good man. 649 00:23:34,891 --> 00:23:36,589 - Is that the whole thousand dollars? 650 00:23:36,632 --> 00:23:38,547 - It's all of it. 651 00:23:38,591 --> 00:23:41,507 - Uh, you know what? 652 00:23:41,550 --> 00:23:43,117 I wouldn't feel right taking that. 653 00:23:43,160 --> 00:23:44,510 You keep it, Laura. 654 00:23:44,553 --> 00:23:48,296 Oh, by the way, here's Dutch's phone. 655 00:23:48,339 --> 00:23:50,951 I didn't want it to get lost after the slideshow. 656 00:23:50,994 --> 00:23:55,303 - Thanks, Granny, that is so sweet of you. 657 00:23:55,346 --> 00:23:56,739 - Of course. 658 00:23:59,394 --> 00:24:00,613 - Sucker. 659 00:24:00,656 --> 00:24:02,789 - Yeah. [chuckles] 47605

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.