All language subtitles for The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet S04E06 The Campers 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP2 0 H 264-CRFW (1)_track4_[eng]

[music playing]

- Aunt Jemima!

- Aunt Jemima, America's
favorite pancake mix presents--

- The Nelsons.

- With--

- Ozzie, Harriet,
David, and Ricky.

[theme music]

- And now, Aunt
Jemima Pancake Mix

presents America's favorite
family comedy, "The Adventures

of Ozzie and Harriet," starring
the entire Nelson family--

Ozzie, Harriet,
David, and Ricky--

with Don DeFore as Thorny.

- You look industrious.

What are you doing?

- Making myself a cup
of soft-boiled eggs.

- Oh, here, I'll do it for you.

- Please, Harriet, there's
nothing hard about soft-boiled

eggs.

- There is the way you do 'em.

You leave them in
the water too long.

- Cut it out, will you?

I've done this before.

- And you'll do it again.

- Hi, Pop.

- Oh, good morning, Dave.

- Morning, Pop.

- Morning, Rick

- Oh, Pop, do you know
where our beach umbrella is?

- Oh, uh, yeah, it's
right down the cellar.

Uh, Dave, what do you want
with our beach umbrella?

And what were you just
doing with the beach chair?

- Mr. Thornberry
wants to borrow 'em.

He needs them for
his camping trip.

- Do we have any spare charcoal?

Mr. Thornberry wants
to borrow some.

- What does he
want with charcoal?

- He says there's no sense of
borrowing our portable barbecue

unless he has some charcoal.

- Well, he's got a lot of nerve.

What does the man want to do,
borrow everything we've got?

- He doesn't want to
borrow our flashlight.

- Oh, well, that's nice.

- He says the
batteries are too weak.

- Well, I thought there
must be some reason.

- He took our kerosene lamp
and a pint of kerosene, too.

- Oh, well, this is too much.

I'll go out and have
a talk with him.

- I'll go down and
get the umbrella.

- Uh, Rick?

- He'll just talk you
out of it anyway, Pop.

[music playing]

- What's all this junk?

- Junk?

That's no way to talk
about your stuff.

Of course, it's
not all your stuff.

Some of this stuff is my junk.

- Well, now wait a minute.

You mean to say you're going
to take all this on a camping

trip?
- Well, sure.

You know the old boy scout
motto, "be prepared."

Well, I'm not only
going to be prepared,

I'm going to be ready.

- Ready for what?

- I'm ready for any exigency.

- In the first place, I
think the word is "exigency."

- Well, here, look it
up in the dictionary.

- You going to take
a dictionary along?

- Well, sure.

Suppose I get stuck in some
word in the encyclopedia.

- Encyclopedia?

Well, naturally, I'm not going
to take the whole set, just

the volume on camping.

- Oh, now wait a minute.

This is ridiculous.

A water cooler?

- This is spring water.

You always drink that
when you go camping.

- Well, I know, but you
drink it out of a spring.

- Well, maybe you do, but
I'm not taking any chances.

- Here's the old bicycle
pump, Mr. Thornberry.

- Oh, thanks, Dave.

- You want me to pump up
the air mattress for you?

- Oh, no, thanks.

I can do it myself.

- Oh, I'm afraid
we're out of luck

with the portable
typewriter, though.

- Portable typewriter?

- Well, certainly, in case I
want to write any postcards.

Gee, you couldn't find it, huh?

- No, sir.

I looked all over
the garage, too.

I'll see if it's in the attic.

- Oh, fine, Dave.

- This is the most
ridiculous thing

I've ever heard of in my life.

- Well, don't stand
there criticizing.

Give me a hand with this stuff.

I want to test this air
mattress for any leaks.

- Why are you bothering
to go on a trip at all?

Why don't you just pitch a
tent in your living room?

- Because I promised my boy
Will I'd take him camping,

and I always like
to keep my promises.

- Seems to me Will
is old enough to go

on a camping trip by himself.

When did you make this promise?

- About 12 years ago.

- 12 years ago?

- Well, Oz, you know,
I've been pretty busy.

After all, the boy
will be getting

married in a couple of
years, and, as I say,

I always like to
keep my promises.

- Well, what kind
of a camping trip

do you call this anyway
with all this junk?

If you're going to take the
boy camping, take him camping.

Rough it.

- What do you think
we're going to do?

You think it's easy pumping up
one of these air mattresses?

- Well, when I take
my boys camping,

we sleep on the ground.

- That's because you're too
cheap to buy an air mattress.

- I mean it, Thorny.

You're not being
fair to the boy.

You've kept him waiting
all these years.

The least you can do is take
him on a real camping trip.

- What's your idea of
a real camping trip?

- Well, get out in the
woods and rough it.

Build yourself a lean-to.

Forage for food.

Sleep out under the stars.

So happens I just read
an article the other day

about a man and his family,
and they went out in the woods

and they stayed
there for two months.

And all they had was an ax, a
knife, and a couple of matches.

- What about it?

- What about it?

Well, they proved it's possible
to live in the woods using just

your ingenuity, and the food
and shelter nature provides.

That's what about it.

- Do you think your
family could do it?

- Well, of course we could.

- Pardon me, Oz, while I smile.

- Well, now just a second.

You mean you don't believe
that Harriet and the boys

and I could live in the
woods under those conditions?

- Of course you couldn't.

Excuse me.

- I'm afraid you've
underestimated the Nelson

family.

We're not soft like you
Thornberrys, you know?

- Who's soft?
- You are!

- Look, Oz, if you want
to go out in the woods

and play Swiss Family
Robinson, go right ahead,

but I'll guarantee you
won't last overnight.

Now, excuse me.
- Oh, yeah?

You'll see, wise guy.

- Oz, not so loud.

I'm trying to get a little rest.

[music playing]

- That darned Thorny.

- I take it you
and he were having

a little friendly dispute.

- Oh, he makes me
so mad at times.

Hey, what happened to
my soft-boiled eggs?

- They're on the window sill.

You can color them for Easter.

- Why didn't you take
them out of the water?

- What water?

It all boiled away.

- Well, it's all that
darned Thorny's fault.

You know what he had
the nerve to say?

- No.

Your voices were loud, but
the words weren't clear.

- Well, he had the
nerve to try and tell me

that you and the
boys and I couldn't

go up into the woods with
an ax, a knife, and a couple

of matches, build our own
shelter, find our own food

and survive for a weekend.

- Well, I agree with him.

- Oh, Harriet, believe
me, we can do it!

And what's more, we're going to.

- What are we trying to prove?

- Well, for one
thing, we're not going

to stand by while
Thorny challenges

the honor of our family.

We've got to do it, Harriet.

- Why?

- Well, we've got to do it.

- Oh, well, as long as
you've got a good reason.

- Not only that,
it'll be a lot of fun.

Besides, it'll test our
ingenuity, our ability

to survive.

I was telling Thorny
about this one family

that stayed out in the
woods for two months,

and they got along fine.

- Well, why don't you take them?

- That wouldn't be the same.

- Oh, thank you, dear.

- Can't you see, Harriet?

This is a challenge.

- Well, it's all
right with me if it's

all right with the boys.

- Oh, well, I'm sure it'll
be all right with the boys.

- What'll be all right with us?

- Oh, hiya, Dave, uh, Rick.

You just came in in time.

Uh, would you guys like
to do me a little favor?

- Gee, I'm sorry, Pop.

I'm broke myself.

- Oh, no, no, this has
nothing to do with money,

uh, this time.

I was wondering,
would you guys like

to go camping over the weekend?

- Well, gee, Pop, we can't.

Mr. Thornberry has all
our camping equipment.

Maybe next time.

- Oh, uh, well, see,
that's what I meant.

I meant we'd go camping
without any equipment at all.

No luxuries.

Just an ax, some
matches, and a knife.

You know, we'd sort of rough
it, forage for our own food,

eat roots and berries,
and sleep on the ground.

Doesn't it sound like fun?

- This may be one of
those times you'll

be sorry you taught
us to tell the truth.

[music playing]

- Hiya, Pop.

- Oh, hiya, Dave.

- Where's Mom?

- Oh, she's upstairs.

- What's the matter
with Pop today, Mom?

Seems unhappy about something.

He's just been sitting
around the house all day.

- I guess he's afraid
to face Mr. Thornberry.

- Why?

Did Pop break his
lawnmower or something?

- No, nothing like that.

- What's gotten into Pop?

- I just asked the same thing,
only more grammatically.

- Well, frankly, I think
he's a little disappointed

in you boys.

- You mean he still
wishes we were girls?

- Oh, no.

We let him down about
that camping trip.

You know, that was
pretty important to him.

- Why?

- Well, because he feels
the honor of our family

is at stake.

- Don't forget, we've gone
camping with Pop before.

- Yeah, but not
with just a knife,

and an ax, and a
couple of matches.

What was the idea of that, Mom?

- Well, that was the whole
point of his argument

with Mr. Thornberry.

- You mean Mr. Thornberry
said we couldn't do it?

- Yeah, that's right.

He said that we
couldn't last overnight.

And your father had
enough confidence in us

to accept the challenge.

- Well, why didn't he say so?

I accept the challenge, too.

Those Thornberrys are
going to be sorry they ever

started with us Nelsons.

This is a good,
old-fashioned family feud.

- Wait, did I hear
somebody say "Thornberrys"?

- When are we going?

- Going where?
- Camping.

- Now, now, wait a minute.

You mean you're actually going
on the camping trip with me?

- We sure are.
- We sure are.

- Nobody can challenge us
Nelsons and get away with it.

- Where do you
think you're going?

- Off to pick me
off a Thornberry.

[music playing]

- [SINGING] Now, good ol'
Ozzie is a peaceful soul,

keeps his temper
in good control.

But the Nelson family
has a lot of pride,

so don't try to take an
old skin off their hide.

Ozzie, Ozzie Nelson,
pride of the neighborhood.

Now, neighbor Thorny,
a real good man,

challenged the daddy
of the Nelson clan

to live in the woods with
his boys and his wife

and a couple of matches
and an ax and a knife.

Ozzie, Ozzie Nelson,
pride of the neighborhood.

So now they're headed
for the thickest wood

to prove their courage
to the neighborhood.

They'll drink from the
spring and eat from the tree

and have the last
laugh on Thorny-Berry.

Ozzie, Ozzie Nelson,
pride of the neighborhood.

Ozzie, Ozzie Nelson,
pride of the neighborhood.

Pride of the neighborhood.

- Well, no sign of Mr.
Thornberry yet, huh, Pop?

- No, he probably
hired a moving van

to lug all this
equipment up here.

- How about our equipment?

- Well, here's the ax.
You got the knife, Pop?

- Yeah, right here.
- And here are the two matches.

- Oh.

Hey, these are precious.

I wish I had something
to keep these in.

- How about the wax paper
from my ham sandwich?

- Now, Rick, you're not supposed
to bring any food along.

That's one of the main
ideas of this trip,

to show we can
find our own food.

- Well, I found this...

In the refrigerator.

- That's not what I--
here, give it to me.

- Hey, wait a minute.

You're not going to
throw that away, are you?

- No, but I'm going
to put it in the car.

Ricky knows we're not supposed
to have any food along.

- Hey, wait a minute.

- How did those get there?

- I wonder.

- Here, I'll take them.

- Ricky, this is ridiculous.

A jar of mustard?

- Hey, come back here.

- You can't take
mustard along with you.

- If I can't have the mustard,
you might as well take these.

[music playing]

- Come on, gang, let's go.

- As soon as I put
these in the car, Pop.

- You first, Mr. Boone.

- Uh, look, fellas, we're
going to hike quite a ways

into the woods, so I think if
we set a nice, bright cadence,

we won't get tired so fast, OK?

- All right, you set the pace.

- All right, 1, 2, 3, 4.

1, 2, 3, 4.

Forward.

1, 2, 3, 4.

[music playing]

Uh, look, gang, we've got
about 12 miles more to go,

so I think we'd better quicken
the pace a little bit, OK?

[SINGING] It's a long
way to Tipperary.

It's a long way to go.

It's a long way to...

- [SINGING] Pack up your
troubles in your old kit bag

and smile, smile, smile.

How many more miles, dear?

- Oh, about eight, I think.

- [SINGING] Pack up your
troubles in your own kit bag

and smile.

[music playing]

- How many more miles now, dear?

- How many more miles
now, dear-- uh, Pop?

- Oh, about six, I would say.

- You sure this is
the right direction?

- Yeah, straight ahead.

- [sighs] How many more miles?

- I don't know, Mom.

How many more miles?

- I don't know.

How many more miles, Pop?

Pop?

- I'm coming.

- How many more miles, Pop?

- Oh, about-- hey, you know,
this looks like a good place

to camp, right here.

- Oh, hooray.

- You know, if I
do say so myself,

I think we've got a darn
good lean-to here, boys.

Looks plenty strong, too.

- Shall I give it
the old Indian test

and jump up and down on it?

- No, no, I don't think
that'll be necessary, son.

Harriet, have you seen this?

I don't care how much equipment
the Thornberrys have brought

along, they're not going to
sleep any more comfortably

than we are in this.

- Yeah, it looks fine, dear.

Gee, I'm awful hungry.

What are we going
to do about food?

- That's a good question.

- You got a good answer, Pop?

- As a matter of fact, I have.

We're going to
hunt for our food.

Suppose we disperse
into the woods

and get back here in,
say, about 15 minutes,

and we'll bring back everything
we see that's edible.

- What about rabbits?

- Well, uh, I think
rabbits are going to be

kind of hard to catch out here.

Wild rabbits run pretty fast.

- I saw an old shoe
down on the path.

We could boil that.

- I'm not kidding, Harriet.

Oh, you'll find lots of
stuff; berries, and roots,

and things growing, and
a lot of edible things.

Well, come on, fellas,
let's get going.

[music playing]

Harriet!

Dave!

Ricky!

Dave!

- Here I come, Pop.

- Oh, how'd you make out, son?

- I got some blueberries,
the last ones of the season.

- Oh, good for you.

- I got some in every pocket.

- Hey, they look fine.

I got some edible roots here.

- Here's my contribution!

I got some wildflowers.

- Harriet, we can't eat flowers.

- Oh, well, these are for a
centerpiece for the dinner

table.

Just because we're
out in the woods

doesn't mean we have
to be uncivilized.

- Dave, have you seen Rick?

- Well, I saw him a minute ago.

Rick?

Oh, here he comes.

- Hi, folks.
- What do you got?

- Meat.

- A frog?

- Yeah, you get legs from him.

If we were in Paris,
this would be a delicacy.

- Come on, Ricky.

Let the poor guy go.

- I was kind of getting
to like him anyway.

So long, Pierre.

See you around the
Champs-Elysees.

[frog croaks]

What are we having
for dinner, Pop?

- Oh, I'm going to make a stew
out of these edible roots here.

A lot of food value in these,
a lot of valuable minerals

and vitamins and things.

- Oh.

- I think I will go back
and pick up that old shoe.

- Harriet, come back here.

Where's your family pride?

Where's your
competitive instinct?

Have you forgotten
the Thornberrys?

- No, I remember them.

They're the people
who are probably

barbecuing a steak right now.

- Oh, I'll make a
delicious stew with ease.

- Pop, maybe I'd better
not bring this up,

but don't we need
water for a stew?

- Yes, and I'm glad
you mentioned it, Dave.

Listen to this fellas.

Now, here's a valuable
lesson on camping.

I'll guarantee there's
plenty of water

right in the immediate
vicinity of our camp here.

- How do you know?

- By the moss on the trees.

See, you can always tell where
there's water by the moss.

The moss kind of reaches
out for the water.

You think I'm kidding?

Furthermore, I'll
guarantee you the water is

within 20 paces of here,
and it's in that direction.

See how close I am.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6.

Oh!

[music playing]

David?

Ricky?

- Say, girls, this looks
like a wonderful place.

- Yeah, this is really great.

- Hey, look.

Somebody left some clothes here.

- Gee, these pants look
like they fit my husband.

[laughter]

[guttural groan]

What was that?

- Sounds like there's something
behind the bush there.

[guttural groan]
It sounds like a mountain lion.

Let's get out of here.

- What about the clothes?

- Leave 'em where they are.

[screaming]

If those matches
hadn't gotten wet,

we'd be eating delicious
root stew for dinner.

- Boy, am I hungry.

I sure could use
some food right now.

- I'm starved.

I wonder if we could
catch that frog again.

- He's my frog.

Besides, you're not
going to eat him.

He's a good friend of mine.

- How did he know
what I was thinking?

- Oh, the boys look so hungry.

I wonder what Ozzie's
thinking about.

- You know what I've been
thinking about, Harriet?

- What?

- Well, that water must
come from somewhere.

- Oh, it's getting you.

- No, no.

Wherever there's a stream,
there's bound to be fish.

- Well, fine, but how are
you going to catch them?

- Well, do you have a pin we
could use for a fish hook?

- Would a hairpin do?

- Yeah, that's swell!

- Here.

- Uh, Dave, cut a fishing
pole for us, would you?

We'll have fish for dinner.
- OK, Pop.

Come on, Rick.

- You're going to be sorry
you brought me along,

but what are you going
to use for a line?

- Do you think that
sweater would unravel?

- Well, it would, but it would
be pretty expensive fish.

- Well, I'm hungry.

[music playing]

That's fine.

You did a good job, Dave.

Harriet?

Looks like we're going
to have fish for dinner.

- Hey, that's all right.

[rustling]

What's that?

[rustling continuing]

- Probably Thorny
crashing through the woods

with all his equipment.

- Oh, good afternoon, folks.
- Well, hello there.

- I'm the ranger
in this district.

- Oh, glad to know you.

I thought you were my
neighbor for a minute.

This is my wife.
- How do you? do?

- This is our older boy, David.
- Hello.

- You folks camping?

- Uh, yes, we are.

We're going to do a
little fishing right now.

- Oh, there's a wonderful
place about a quarter

of a mile from here.

I just came from there.

Did pretty well, huh?

- Wow!

Oh, that's a beautiful catch.

Well, come on, let's get going.

- Well, it's silly
to ask, I know,

but you do have a fishing
license, don't you?

- Oh, I guess we forgot.

- Oh, well then I'm
sorry, you won't

be able to do any fishing.

- Gee, that puts us
in kind of a spot.

See, we came up here
without any food.

Sort of a contest is on
between our neighbor and us,

and we're trying to prove we
can get along in the woods

here with just the food we find.

- Oh, well, that's OK with me.

I don't care how
many fish you find,

just so you don't catch any.

- Yeah, but, I mean, where are
you going to find any fish here

in the woods?

- Well, there are
some fish right there.

- Oh, gee!

Well, Harriet, look
at the fish I found!

- Good for you.

- Oh, gee.

Uh, what are you
writing out there?

- Permit.

You can't cook fish
without a fire,

and you need a permit
to light a fire.

- Oh, thank you very much.

- Oh, gee, this is
darn nice of you.

Thanks a lot.

- Oh, that's quite all right.

Now you've got the permit
and you've got the fish.

Is there anything else you need?

- Well, this is kind
of embarrassing.

Could I have a couple
of dry matches, please?

[chuckling]

- That was a good dinner, dear.

- Oh, thanks.

That's an old boy scout
way of cooking fish.

- Lucky thing we
had that permit.

- Yeah, sure came in
handy to light the fire.

- Harriet?
- Hmm?

- Are you comfortable there?

- Oh, fine.

These pine boughs
smell good, too.

- Well, good night, fellas.
- Good night, Pop.

Good night, Mom.
- Good night.

- Good night, boys.

- Pleasant dreams.

- Oh, thanks, son.

I'll have pleasant
dreams, all right.

I'll be dreaming of ol'
Thorny congratulating me.

[thunder crashing]

- It's starting to rain, Ozzie.

- Hmm?

- It's starting to rain.

- Is it leaking through?

- No, it isn't.

You did a wonderful
job on the lean-to.

- Oh, thanks a lot, Thorny--

I mean, dear.

[music playing]

- I think the ball went
over here, Mr. Thornberry!

- Yeah, it had quite a
hook on it, didn't it?

- Sure did.

- Oz!

- Oh, hi, Thorny.
- Hi, Harriet.

Hi, boys.

- Hi, Mr. Thornberry.

- What are y'all doing here?

- What do you mean "what
are we doing here"?

We're camping, of course.

- On the edge of a golf course?

- Golf course?

- Why, we must have
gone around in a circle!

- Well, suppose we did, we're
still camping in the woods.

We did it, Thorny!

Congratulate us.
- Bully for you.

Did what?

- Well, we camped
out here for a day

and a night with just an ax, a
knife, and a couple of matches,

and our ingenuity.

- Oh, that.

- What do you mean "oh, that"?

Where's your boy, Will?

He's home.

- Well, how come you
and he aren't camping?

- Well, it's a funny thing,
Oz, but after 12 years,

I found out he didn't
want to go camping.

- Now, wait a minute, Thorny,
we spent the night out here

on the cold, hard ground,
and we practically starved.

- Oz, will you give me the ball?

- Wait a minute.

I picked the ball up.

I think it should be my pleasure
to, uh, toss the ball down.

It's right over here, Thorny.
You can play it from over here.

- Oz, wait!

- You can play it
from over here.

- Oh!

Sorehead...

- You're all wet, Thorny...

Or you will be.

[water splashing]

- Oh, poor Thorny.

- Well, come on, gang, let's go.

- Not another hike.

- Well, sure!

- Where to this time?

- Up to the clubhouse for
some nice, hot breakfast.

- Oh, wonderful!
- Oh, great.

- That's the best idea
I've heard in two days.

[music playing]

- Oh, I meant to ask you, did
you read in tonight's paper

about this prize
they're offering?

- No, what prize is that?

- Well, this life
raft manufacturer

is offering a prize of
$10,000 for any party

of four people who
can sail the Pacific

Ocean from San Francisco
to Honolulu in a life raft.

Uh, the only thing,
though, all they're

allowed to take with them
is a large barrel of water,

a sundial and a harpoon.

[ending theme]

- Good luck, dear.

- [SINGING] Every day's is
a holiday with Hotpoint.

- I'm Happy Hotpoint,
here to remind you

that next week,
your Hotpoint dealer

will bring you the Nelsons;
Ozzie, Harriet, David,

and Ricky.

- You ought to see the
Hotpoint all-electric kitchens.

- Yeah, and laundries, too.

In color.

- Your Hotpoint dealer will
be glad to show them to you.

- Believe me, every day's
a holiday with Hotpoint.

[ending theme]

- The forest ranger was
played by Don Goddeaux.

Among the girl hikers were
Vera Marshe and Sally Hughes.

Ted Campbell played
the part of the caddie.

The singing was done
by The Sportsmen.

This is Verne Smith speaking.

This has been an ABC Television
Network presentation.