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1
00:01:17,410 --> 00:01:19,711
Anybody got any spare change?
2
00:01:19,779 --> 00:01:22,614
Anything left in your
pockets you don't want?
3
00:01:22,683 --> 00:01:25,650
Old gum? Traveler's checks?
4
00:01:25,719 --> 00:01:27,552
Somebody want to give
me their clothing?
5
00:01:27,621 --> 00:01:29,788
Hey, hey!
6
00:01:29,857 --> 00:01:31,457
Hey, come on,
no scuzzos allowed in here.
7
00:01:31,491 --> 00:01:32,524
Get out, out!
8
00:01:32,592 --> 00:01:34,226
All right.
9
00:01:34,294 --> 00:01:36,227
Goodbye, everybody!
10
00:01:36,296 --> 00:01:40,265
No... iggy, iggy, no, not you.
11
00:01:40,334 --> 00:01:41,433
You're not a scuzzo.
12
00:01:41,502 --> 00:01:42,767
You're an airhead. We a...
13
00:01:42,836 --> 00:01:44,770
We allow airheads in here.
14
00:01:44,838 --> 00:01:47,772
Come on, hey, scuzz, hey, whoa,
slither out of here, go on, go!
15
00:01:47,841 --> 00:01:50,808
Hey, hey, hey, Louie,
Louie, Louie, Louie!
16
00:01:50,877 --> 00:01:52,144
Be a little bit more sensitive
17
00:01:52,212 --> 00:01:53,445
to the plight of this man.
18
00:01:53,513 --> 00:01:54,613
He's not a scuzzo.
19
00:01:54,681 --> 00:01:56,525
He happens to be a human
being with some dignity.
20
00:01:56,549 --> 00:01:58,350
I'm afraid you're mistaking me
21
00:01:58,419 --> 00:02:01,553
for somebody else.
22
00:02:01,622 --> 00:02:02,622
Wait! Hey, wait.
23
00:02:02,656 --> 00:02:03,921
Wait!
24
00:02:03,990 --> 00:02:07,659
What if I gave you $1,000?
25
00:02:07,727 --> 00:02:09,027
Jim, Jim, look,
26
00:02:09,096 --> 00:02:10,862
I know you've inherited
a lot of money,
27
00:02:10,931 --> 00:02:12,631
but, you know,
there is such a thing
28
00:02:12,699 --> 00:02:14,132
as being too soft a touch.
29
00:02:14,201 --> 00:02:17,669
Define "too soft a touch."
30
00:02:17,738 --> 00:02:21,172
It's my money...
31
00:02:21,241 --> 00:02:25,377
And I'll spend it
however I want.
32
00:02:25,446 --> 00:02:27,579
Jim...
33
00:02:29,350 --> 00:02:30,448
Take it.
34
00:02:37,158 --> 00:02:39,858
I don't know who you are
35
00:02:39,926 --> 00:02:42,361
and I don't know
why you did this,
36
00:02:42,429 --> 00:02:43,862
but it's nice to know
37
00:02:43,930 --> 00:02:45,497
there are people like
you in the world.
38
00:02:45,565 --> 00:02:49,367
I mean that from
one bum to another.
39
00:02:58,545 --> 00:03:00,011
Wow!
40
00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:01,179
Jim, Jim... huh?
41
00:03:01,248 --> 00:03:03,014
Look, if you want
to be that generous,
42
00:03:03,083 --> 00:03:05,750
why don't you give it
to organized charities?
43
00:03:05,819 --> 00:03:08,353
I do,
but when I give away $1,000
44
00:03:08,422 --> 00:03:11,723
like I just did,
it's not charity.
45
00:03:11,792 --> 00:03:15,593
I do it out of selfishness.
46
00:03:15,662 --> 00:03:18,696
To experience the joy you get
47
00:03:18,765 --> 00:03:21,466
when you personally
hand over money
48
00:03:21,535 --> 00:03:24,369
that's gonna make a person's
life a little better.
49
00:03:24,438 --> 00:03:26,371
You sound like
you do this a lot.
50
00:03:26,439 --> 00:03:28,206
Oh, no, not a lot.
51
00:03:28,275 --> 00:03:34,379
Like, today,
I'm only gonna do it five more times.
52
00:03:34,448 --> 00:03:36,548
Oh, now, wait a
minute, wait a minute.
53
00:03:36,617 --> 00:03:39,618
Jim, look, I don't care
how much money you've got.
54
00:03:39,686 --> 00:03:41,820
Now, uh, this is stupid.
55
00:03:41,889 --> 00:03:43,822
This is stup... this is cra...
this is reckless,
56
00:03:43,891 --> 00:03:45,156
this is irresponsible
57
00:03:45,225 --> 00:03:47,592
and I'm not gonna let
you go on doing this.
58
00:03:47,661 --> 00:03:48,793
Even if it means
59
00:03:48,862 --> 00:03:50,428
calling the administers
of your estate,
60
00:03:50,497 --> 00:03:52,096
I'm not gonna let you do
it, Jim.
61
00:03:52,165 --> 00:03:53,698
Oh, this is different.
62
00:03:53,766 --> 00:03:55,066
This is helping people.
63
00:03:55,135 --> 00:03:56,501
Oh, come on, Jim, will you?
64
00:03:56,570 --> 00:03:58,770
Go ahead, call my lawyers if you want.
I'm gonna do it!
65
00:03:58,839 --> 00:04:01,072
You wouldn't say
those things to me
66
00:04:01,140 --> 00:04:03,307
if you really knew
what it was like.
67
00:04:03,376 --> 00:04:04,643
Wait a minute!
68
00:04:05,846 --> 00:04:08,780
What if you found
out what it was like?
69
00:04:08,848 --> 00:04:11,316
What if I gave you $1,000?
70
00:04:13,320 --> 00:04:18,757
What if I gave all
of you $1,000...
71
00:04:18,825 --> 00:04:20,759
To give to one person
72
00:04:20,828 --> 00:04:23,728
before the end of the shift?
73
00:04:23,797 --> 00:04:25,663
Then if you come
back and say to me
74
00:04:25,732 --> 00:04:28,667
that it was stupid and
crazy, I'll stop.
75
00:04:31,070 --> 00:04:33,004
What do you say, Alex?
76
00:04:34,741 --> 00:04:35,674
Come on.
77
00:04:35,742 --> 00:04:37,141
If you promise to stop!
78
00:04:37,210 --> 00:04:41,346
Yes,
you passionate son of a gun.
79
00:04:42,716 --> 00:04:46,284
Here you go, Alex.
80
00:04:48,922 --> 00:04:50,154
Elaine.
81
00:04:50,223 --> 00:04:53,725
Well, it sounds like
a fair challenge.
82
00:04:53,794 --> 00:04:58,230
People down on their luck
get into my cab every day.
83
00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:00,565
The next guy that gets in
and tells me his troubles
84
00:05:00,634 --> 00:05:02,967
is in for a big surprise.
85
00:05:03,036 --> 00:05:04,468
You know, I think, uh, I know,
86
00:05:04,537 --> 00:05:06,571
I know somebody I
can give this to.
87
00:05:06,639 --> 00:05:08,272
Can the one person I
give this money to,
88
00:05:08,341 --> 00:05:09,775
can it be one of my kids?
89
00:05:09,843 --> 00:05:11,776
Why not?
90
00:05:11,844 --> 00:05:13,778
Give it to one of your kids.
91
00:05:13,847 --> 00:05:14,946
That's great!
92
00:05:15,015 --> 00:05:16,915
Thank you!
93
00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:20,652
Here you go, latka.
94
00:05:20,721 --> 00:05:24,456
Oh...
95
00:05:24,525 --> 00:05:26,924
The tradition of my country
forces me to protest.
96
00:05:26,993 --> 00:05:28,427
Come on, take the money.
97
00:05:28,495 --> 00:05:32,530
Oh, I'll take the money,
but first I have to protest.
98
00:05:35,302 --> 00:05:37,202
No, no, no!
99
00:05:37,271 --> 00:05:38,803
I won't take it!
100
00:05:38,872 --> 00:05:40,171
This is an insult!
101
00:05:44,010 --> 00:05:46,010
Thank you very much.
102
00:05:47,114 --> 00:05:50,748
I notice...
103
00:05:52,252 --> 00:05:55,787
You excluded me from
your little challenge.
104
00:05:55,856 --> 00:05:57,656
You're wrong, boss.
105
00:05:57,724 --> 00:06:01,893
I'm including you
in this challenge.
106
00:06:01,961 --> 00:06:03,528
Now, wait a minute,
wait a minute, Jim!
107
00:06:03,597 --> 00:06:05,397
You give a thousand
bucks to Louie de palma,
108
00:06:05,466 --> 00:06:07,865
you better be there to see
that he gives it to somebody.
109
00:06:07,934 --> 00:06:09,300
Yeah. Otherwise he's gonna
110
00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:11,135
pocket that money
himself and lie about it.
111
00:06:11,204 --> 00:06:13,571
Would you do that?
112
00:06:13,640 --> 00:06:15,006
Of course.
113
00:06:15,074 --> 00:06:17,275
No, no, wait, wait,
wait, hold it!
114
00:06:17,343 --> 00:06:18,777
I want to play, too.
115
00:06:18,845 --> 00:06:20,878
All right?
116
00:06:20,947 --> 00:06:24,348
How about if I give
the money to Jeff?
117
00:06:24,417 --> 00:06:26,184
This way you can check on it.
118
00:06:26,252 --> 00:06:28,353
Okeydoke.
119
00:06:31,625 --> 00:06:35,493
Do you really think...
120
00:06:35,561 --> 00:06:38,864
That me giving away $1,000
121
00:06:38,932 --> 00:06:40,866
is gonna make me feel good?
122
00:06:40,934 --> 00:06:42,534
You think me?
123
00:06:42,603 --> 00:06:44,135
I'm not him, you know.
124
00:06:44,204 --> 00:06:45,536
I'm not him.
125
00:06:45,605 --> 00:06:46,971
I'm not the guy who says,
126
00:06:47,040 --> 00:06:50,508
"oh, every day,
somebody gets in my cab
127
00:06:50,577 --> 00:06:53,879
who's down on their luck, ooh."
128
00:06:56,583 --> 00:06:59,050
Whatever you say, boss.
129
00:06:59,119 --> 00:07:01,853
I wish I could be there
130
00:07:01,921 --> 00:07:06,191
to see the expression on your
face when you give it to him.
131
00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:08,126
Oh, yeah,
well you won't have to wait, iggy.
132
00:07:08,195 --> 00:07:10,161
You can see it right now.
133
00:07:15,135 --> 00:07:16,634
Reverend gorky,
134
00:07:16,703 --> 00:07:21,239
this is a very joyous
occasion for simka and me.
135
00:07:21,308 --> 00:07:23,809
We know how little money
136
00:07:23,877 --> 00:07:26,144
our humble church
is able to pay you.
137
00:07:26,212 --> 00:07:29,146
Ah, I don't complain.
138
00:07:29,215 --> 00:07:35,253
Simka and I would
like to give to you...
139
00:07:35,321 --> 00:07:37,956
$1,000!
140
00:07:38,024 --> 00:07:39,791
$1,000? Yes.
141
00:07:39,860 --> 00:07:42,259
You are giving me $1,000?
142
00:07:42,328 --> 00:07:43,261
Yes.
143
00:07:43,330 --> 00:07:46,898
Stinking lousy $1,000?
144
00:07:46,967 --> 00:07:48,232
How dare you!
145
00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:49,668
I spit on your money!
146
00:07:51,804 --> 00:07:54,239
Thank you very much.
147
00:07:56,242 --> 00:07:58,309
Oh, reverend gorky,
148
00:07:58,378 --> 00:08:00,312
I'm very happy
that you're happy.
149
00:08:00,380 --> 00:08:04,649
Simka, is forwith so wrong?
150
00:08:04,717 --> 00:08:06,517
I wanted that $1,000
151
00:08:06,586 --> 00:08:08,786
so we could afford
to have a baby.
152
00:08:13,826 --> 00:08:17,596
You are so good-hearted.
153
00:08:17,664 --> 00:08:21,432
Take money to have baby.
154
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:25,803
You are giving me this $1,000?!
155
00:08:25,872 --> 00:08:27,305
No, no, no!
156
00:08:27,373 --> 00:08:28,940
I won't take it!
157
00:08:29,008 --> 00:08:31,142
Wow! Thank you!
158
00:08:31,211 --> 00:08:33,444
God bless you!
159
00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:39,250
Oh, our traditions
are so beautiful!
160
00:08:44,124 --> 00:08:45,256
Who is it?
161
00:08:45,325 --> 00:08:46,658
It's Tony!
162
00:08:46,727 --> 00:08:49,005
Tony banta from down at the gym?
163
00:08:49,029 --> 00:08:50,029
Yeah!
164
00:08:50,063 --> 00:08:51,696
It's not Thursday night, is it?
165
00:08:51,764 --> 00:08:53,998
No, I thought I'd stop
by early this week.
166
00:08:54,067 --> 00:08:56,067
Why didn't you call?
167
00:08:56,136 --> 00:08:57,401
You haven't got a phone!
168
00:08:57,470 --> 00:08:58,936
I meant from the sidewalk.
169
00:08:59,005 --> 00:09:00,805
I do have a window.
170
00:09:00,873 --> 00:09:02,473
Are you gonna let me in or not?
171
00:09:02,542 --> 00:09:03,942
What are you getting
so upset about?
172
00:09:03,977 --> 00:09:05,054
On the national scene...
173
00:09:11,885 --> 00:09:14,352
I wanted to stop by early
'cause I got a surprise for you.
174
00:09:14,421 --> 00:09:16,020
I brought you a gift.
175
00:09:18,124 --> 00:09:19,691
I hope it's chocolates.
176
00:09:22,795 --> 00:09:24,462
Come on, open it up.
177
00:09:24,530 --> 00:09:25,897
I don't want to open it up yet.
178
00:09:25,966 --> 00:09:27,944
Come on, what do you want
to do before you open it?
179
00:09:27,968 --> 00:09:31,836
Talk.
180
00:09:31,904 --> 00:09:33,538
Okay.
181
00:09:33,607 --> 00:09:35,440
Uh, how was days
of our lives today?
182
00:09:35,509 --> 00:09:36,608
Good, good.
183
00:09:36,676 --> 00:09:38,075
But you know what
was really great?
184
00:09:38,144 --> 00:09:41,412
Gilligan's island.
185
00:09:41,481 --> 00:09:45,583
That classic one where
gilligan gets hypnotized
186
00:09:45,652 --> 00:09:47,418
and thinks he's Mary Ann.
187
00:09:47,487 --> 00:09:49,287
Yeah, sure.
188
00:09:49,355 --> 00:09:51,756
Boy, the skipper was really
mad at him that time, huh?
189
00:09:51,825 --> 00:09:53,424
Who wouldn't be?
190
00:09:53,493 --> 00:09:57,429
Cat dressed up like
a dad-blamed woman.
191
00:09:57,497 --> 00:09:59,831
Bonanza is coming on now.
192
00:09:59,900 --> 00:10:01,366
Would you like to watch it?
193
00:10:01,435 --> 00:10:03,201
Sure. It'll be on
in a couple seconds.
194
00:10:03,270 --> 00:10:04,435
Okay.
195
00:10:04,504 --> 00:10:07,972
Now this episode, Tony,
196
00:10:08,041 --> 00:10:10,542
is the one where
hoss' friend's dog
197
00:10:10,610 --> 00:10:13,444
outsmarts the crooks.
198
00:10:13,513 --> 00:10:15,379
I've watched it 100 times.
199
00:10:15,448 --> 00:10:17,181
You know,
I'll tell you something, Walt.
200
00:10:17,250 --> 00:10:19,050
On this old
black-and-white TV set,
201
00:10:19,119 --> 00:10:21,920
I mean, you can't tell how
blue the ponderosa sky is
202
00:10:21,988 --> 00:10:23,588
or how green the trees are,
203
00:10:23,657 --> 00:10:26,424
or even what shade of brown
little Joe's horse is.
204
00:10:26,493 --> 00:10:29,461
Hey, what did I ever do to you?
205
00:10:29,529 --> 00:10:31,595
Come on, Walt,
let's open your present.
206
00:10:31,664 --> 00:10:32,764
Come on.
207
00:10:32,832 --> 00:10:34,599
Come on, I'll help you.
208
00:10:45,645 --> 00:10:49,180
It's yours.
209
00:10:49,249 --> 00:10:54,252
21 inches... great color.
210
00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:57,722
This is it.
211
00:10:59,893 --> 00:11:06,731
Stereo speakers...
And remote control.
212
00:11:10,036 --> 00:11:13,371
Tony... hey, come on, Walt.
213
00:11:13,440 --> 00:11:14,840
Don't start getting
teary on me now.
214
00:11:14,874 --> 00:11:16,352
You know,
the color's gonna look blurred.
215
00:11:16,376 --> 00:11:17,742
Come on, sit down.
216
00:11:19,713 --> 00:11:20,713
Sit right here.
217
00:11:20,747 --> 00:11:22,046
There you go.
218
00:11:22,115 --> 00:11:24,382
There, there you go.
219
00:11:24,450 --> 00:11:26,851
Switch that baby on.
220
00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:28,853
Oh...
221
00:11:33,860 --> 00:11:36,060
Pretty good, ain't it?
222
00:11:38,564 --> 00:11:42,166
This is the happiest
day of my life.
223
00:11:42,234 --> 00:11:44,702
I'll never forget it
as long as I live.
224
00:11:44,771 --> 00:11:46,203
Hey, Walt, me, too.
225
00:11:46,272 --> 00:11:48,117
I mean, this may be the nicest
thing that ever happened to me.
226
00:11:48,141 --> 00:11:49,207
I tell you, man,
227
00:11:49,276 --> 00:11:50,620
I just hope that this
TV gives you plenty...
228
00:11:50,644 --> 00:11:51,775
Shut up, shut up, Tony.
229
00:11:51,844 --> 00:11:53,344
It's starting now.
230
00:11:54,848 --> 00:11:56,347
Okay, Walt.
231
00:11:56,416 --> 00:11:58,483
Hey, I'll see you around;
I got to finish my shift.
232
00:11:58,552 --> 00:12:02,053
Thursday night, right?
233
00:12:02,122 --> 00:12:03,755
You bet your life.
234
00:12:09,996 --> 00:12:11,796
And call next time!
235
00:12:18,371 --> 00:12:21,038
Jennifer, I have to talk to you.
236
00:12:21,107 --> 00:12:23,141
I'm sorry I had to wake
you, but...
237
00:12:23,209 --> 00:12:24,776
But I have a little problem
238
00:12:24,845 --> 00:12:27,011
and I wanted you
to help me with it.
239
00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:29,180
Is it men again?
240
00:12:30,283 --> 00:12:31,283
No, honey.
241
00:12:31,351 --> 00:12:32,817
Not this time.
242
00:12:32,885 --> 00:12:38,289
Um, Jennifer...
Jim, down at the garage...
243
00:12:38,358 --> 00:12:41,892
He gave me this $1,000.
244
00:12:44,497 --> 00:12:48,566
Now, he told me I have to
give it to someone tonight,
245
00:12:48,635 --> 00:12:51,569
and I'd like to give it
to you and your brother.
246
00:12:51,637 --> 00:12:53,471
But Jason isn't here tonight.
247
00:12:53,540 --> 00:12:54,872
Right.
248
00:12:54,941 --> 00:12:57,442
So, I'm going to give it to you.
249
00:12:59,479 --> 00:13:02,313
And I get to keep all of it?
250
00:13:02,381 --> 00:13:04,315
Well, you probably want
251
00:13:04,384 --> 00:13:06,817
to give half of it to your
brother, right?
252
00:13:06,886 --> 00:13:08,619
No.
253
00:13:09,989 --> 00:13:11,222
Jennifer, come here.
254
00:13:11,291 --> 00:13:13,057
Come here, baby.
255
00:13:13,125 --> 00:13:16,561
Look... I gave you this money,
256
00:13:16,630 --> 00:13:18,263
and I'm not going
to take it back.
257
00:13:18,331 --> 00:13:19,697
I mean, it's your money
now, and...
258
00:13:19,766 --> 00:13:21,766
And you can do whatever
you want with it.
259
00:13:21,835 --> 00:13:26,570
You can be sweet...
And generous...
260
00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:28,806
And loving...
261
00:13:28,875 --> 00:13:31,108
And share it with your brother,
262
00:13:31,177 --> 00:13:36,814
or you can be mean
and selfish and greedy
263
00:13:36,883 --> 00:13:39,283
and not share it with him.
264
00:13:39,351 --> 00:13:41,019
It's up to you.
265
00:13:41,087 --> 00:13:43,521
So, what are you going to do?
266
00:13:43,589 --> 00:13:47,325
All right,
I'll give half the money to Jason.
267
00:13:49,395 --> 00:13:51,362
Okay.
268
00:13:56,870 --> 00:13:58,736
Mommy?
269
00:13:58,805 --> 00:14:03,440
Is it okay if I use my $500
to buy something for you?
270
00:14:04,678 --> 00:14:06,110
Oh, honey.
271
00:14:06,179 --> 00:14:08,312
That's sweet... I...
272
00:14:08,381 --> 00:14:11,382
But... but I don't
really need anything.
273
00:14:11,450 --> 00:14:13,384
What would you buy me?
274
00:14:13,453 --> 00:14:16,154
Colecovision and 11 cassettes.
275
00:14:19,993 --> 00:14:21,492
Sure.
276
00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:27,532
Hey, Lou.
277
00:14:27,601 --> 00:14:29,161
Oh, Jeff, there you are.
278
00:14:29,202 --> 00:14:31,069
Listen, I got something for you.
279
00:14:31,137 --> 00:14:33,838
Now, look, I know you
could use some extra money,
280
00:14:33,906 --> 00:14:36,341
but I'm only doing
this to prove a point,
281
00:14:36,409 --> 00:14:38,009
so don't get weepy on me here.
282
00:14:38,078 --> 00:14:39,209
Now, don't get sappy.
283
00:14:39,278 --> 00:14:41,512
I'm going to make
this short and sweet.
284
00:14:41,581 --> 00:14:43,681
I'm giving you $1,000.
285
00:14:43,750 --> 00:14:45,750
The hell you are.
286
00:14:51,590 --> 00:14:53,624
Jeff...
287
00:14:53,693 --> 00:14:55,493
Jeff, I don't understand.
288
00:14:55,561 --> 00:14:58,496
You need the money,
so what's the matter?
289
00:14:58,564 --> 00:15:00,298
I don't want your money, Louie.
290
00:15:00,367 --> 00:15:02,433
What's the matter with my money?
291
00:15:02,501 --> 00:15:04,568
It could be dirty money.
292
00:15:05,705 --> 00:15:07,371
I'm not asking
you to eat off it.
293
00:15:07,440 --> 00:15:09,840
All I'm asking you to do
is put it in your pocket.
294
00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:11,542
Spend it on your
poor grandmother.
295
00:15:11,610 --> 00:15:13,378
No, thanks.
296
00:15:13,446 --> 00:15:14,645
Hey, Jeff.
297
00:15:14,714 --> 00:15:17,447
Did I mention it's $1,000?
298
00:15:18,985 --> 00:15:21,118
I wouldn't care if it's
a million dollars, Louie.
299
00:15:21,187 --> 00:15:23,888
I'm not taking any
money from you.
300
00:15:23,956 --> 00:15:26,957
If I had a million dollars,
I'd hire three big guys
301
00:15:27,026 --> 00:15:29,794
to stuff this lousy
thousand down your throat.
302
00:15:29,863 --> 00:15:31,629
Don't try to sweet-talk
me, Louie.
303
00:15:31,698 --> 00:15:33,731
I'm not taking your money.
304
00:15:34,968 --> 00:15:35,968
Fine, fine.
305
00:15:36,035 --> 00:15:37,268
You don't have to take it.
306
00:15:37,337 --> 00:15:39,003
I don't have to give it to you.
307
00:15:39,072 --> 00:15:40,638
There's plenty of
guys who want it.
308
00:15:40,707 --> 00:15:43,540
God help the person
who takes it from you.
309
00:15:45,211 --> 00:15:47,277
Jeff, are you trying to
make some statement here?
310
00:15:47,346 --> 00:15:48,946
Frankly, I'm offended.
311
00:15:49,014 --> 00:15:50,281
Louie...
312
00:15:50,350 --> 00:15:52,950
I don't know why you want
me to take that money.
313
00:15:53,018 --> 00:15:56,154
All I know is,
if it's coming from Louie de palma,
314
00:15:56,222 --> 00:15:58,222
there's got to be a catch.
315
00:15:58,291 --> 00:16:00,024
What, what, what kind of catch?
316
00:16:00,093 --> 00:16:01,025
What...?
317
00:16:01,094 --> 00:16:02,426
How would I know?
318
00:16:02,495 --> 00:16:05,129
Maybe it's counterfeit money.
319
00:16:05,198 --> 00:16:08,132
Or maybe it's stolen money and
you want to plant it on me.
320
00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:10,167
Maybe it's contaminated
321
00:16:10,236 --> 00:16:12,303
from germ warfare,
and the Russians paid you
322
00:16:12,372 --> 00:16:15,072
to plant it on my
body as an experiment
323
00:16:15,140 --> 00:16:18,876
to see if I sprout some
kind of weird fungus.
324
00:16:29,955 --> 00:16:32,823
It's beginning to sound
like you don't trust me.
325
00:16:46,605 --> 00:16:48,272
Sir, about how much is it
326
00:16:48,340 --> 00:16:49,907
to the port authority
bus station?
327
00:16:49,976 --> 00:16:51,342
I'm on a tight budget.
328
00:16:51,411 --> 00:16:52,776
It's only about three bucks.
329
00:16:52,845 --> 00:16:55,146
Oh.
330
00:16:55,215 --> 00:16:58,048
When the meter hits
$2.50, drop me off.
331
00:16:58,117 --> 00:16:59,616
I'll run the rest of the way.
332
00:16:59,685 --> 00:17:00,852
Ah, don't worry about it.
333
00:17:00,920 --> 00:17:02,453
I'll take you all the way.
334
00:17:02,522 --> 00:17:05,056
Hope I have enough for
the trip back to Oregon.
335
00:17:05,125 --> 00:17:06,290
Well, if you don't,
336
00:17:06,359 --> 00:17:08,526
you can have them leave you off
in, uh, Idaho
337
00:17:08,595 --> 00:17:11,295
and you can run the
rest of the way.
338
00:17:11,364 --> 00:17:13,798
Good-bye, New York!
339
00:17:13,867 --> 00:17:17,368
You chewed me up
and you spit me out!
340
00:17:17,437 --> 00:17:19,770
And we're well rid of you!
341
00:17:19,839 --> 00:17:21,872
Gee, this is a tough town.
342
00:17:21,940 --> 00:17:23,307
Yeah, I know it can be.
343
00:17:24,510 --> 00:17:26,644
Hey, uh, my name is Alex.
344
00:17:26,712 --> 00:17:28,112
Hi. I'm Jeremy.
345
00:17:28,181 --> 00:17:29,480
Hi.
346
00:17:29,548 --> 00:17:30,748
You look a little upset.
347
00:17:30,817 --> 00:17:32,349
You want to tell me about it?
348
00:17:32,418 --> 00:17:33,851
Nah.
349
00:17:33,920 --> 00:17:37,087
You must hear about people's
hard-luck stories all day long.
350
00:17:37,156 --> 00:17:38,422
Oh, not today.
351
00:17:38,491 --> 00:17:41,759
Today, I am starved for
a good hard-luck story.
352
00:17:42,929 --> 00:17:45,763
I came to New York to
make it as a cartoonist,
353
00:17:45,832 --> 00:17:48,699
but now I'm broke and I
have to go home to Oregon.
354
00:17:48,768 --> 00:17:51,369
Are you leaving because
you're broke or because, uh,
355
00:17:51,437 --> 00:17:53,337
you don't think you're
good enough to make it?
356
00:17:53,405 --> 00:17:55,973
I'm leaving because I'm broke.
357
00:17:56,042 --> 00:17:57,741
Uh-huh.
358
00:17:57,810 --> 00:18:00,444
Would you mind if I took a look
at those cartoons of yours?
359
00:18:00,513 --> 00:18:01,579
Sure.
360
00:18:01,647 --> 00:18:04,081
Th-these are political cartoons.
361
00:18:04,150 --> 00:18:06,550
Do...
do you like political cartoons?
362
00:18:06,618 --> 00:18:08,352
I love political cartoons. Yeah?
363
00:18:08,421 --> 00:18:10,954
I've loved political
cartoons all my life. Yeah?
364
00:18:11,023 --> 00:18:12,023
Yeah, yeah. It's nice...
365
00:18:12,057 --> 00:18:13,624
It's nice to run
into one new yorker
366
00:18:13,693 --> 00:18:15,726
who'll appreciate my
work before I leave.
367
00:18:15,795 --> 00:18:17,328
Well, you know something?
368
00:18:17,397 --> 00:18:22,166
Um, I might be able to do more
than just appreciate your work.
369
00:18:22,234 --> 00:18:23,333
Hey, wait a minute.
370
00:18:23,402 --> 00:18:24,813
Let me... let me...
Let me pull over here,
371
00:18:24,837 --> 00:18:26,315
so I can take a look
at those properly.
372
00:18:26,339 --> 00:18:28,039
Hold on.
373
00:18:31,310 --> 00:18:32,609
Look at this one of Reagan
374
00:18:32,678 --> 00:18:34,578
sitting next to an
mx missile silo.
375
00:18:34,647 --> 00:18:35,713
Uh-huh.
376
00:18:35,782 --> 00:18:37,715
Read the caption out loud.
377
00:18:37,784 --> 00:18:39,983
"Nancy, we're late."
378
00:18:43,556 --> 00:18:45,455
I don't think I get it.
379
00:18:45,524 --> 00:18:48,759
Uh, well, you know how she's
always buying new clothes.
380
00:18:48,828 --> 00:18:50,161
Yeah.
381
00:18:50,229 --> 00:18:51,996
Well?
382
00:18:52,064 --> 00:18:53,597
Yeah?
383
00:18:53,666 --> 00:18:55,599
She's in there changing.
384
00:18:55,668 --> 00:18:57,801
Don't you get it?
385
00:18:57,870 --> 00:18:59,704
Why?
386
00:18:59,772 --> 00:19:02,339
Because, uh,
she's run out of closet space
387
00:19:02,408 --> 00:19:04,341
and he doesn't know
where to put the missile.
388
00:19:09,081 --> 00:19:10,481
What are you, a republican?
389
00:19:10,550 --> 00:19:11,748
Here, here, look at...
390
00:19:11,817 --> 00:19:14,018
Look at another one.
391
00:19:14,086 --> 00:19:15,686
Ah, yeah.
392
00:19:15,755 --> 00:19:17,654
That's uncle Sam and
the Russian bear.
393
00:19:17,723 --> 00:19:18,723
Yeah. Yeah.
394
00:19:18,791 --> 00:19:20,091
But you don't have a caption.
395
00:19:20,159 --> 00:19:21,258
You, too, huh?
396
00:19:21,327 --> 00:19:22,627
Hmm?
397
00:19:22,695 --> 00:19:24,128
Wh-why does it need a caption
398
00:19:24,197 --> 00:19:25,896
when they're looking
at each other
399
00:19:25,965 --> 00:19:27,631
with those expressions
on their faces?
400
00:19:29,736 --> 00:19:32,870
You mean you're saying we don't
get along with the Russians?
401
00:19:32,938 --> 00:19:33,938
Well, there you go.
402
00:19:33,973 --> 00:19:35,872
Was that so hard?
403
00:19:39,945 --> 00:19:42,479
So, what are you
going to do in Oregon?
404
00:19:46,653 --> 00:19:47,751
Alex!
405
00:19:47,820 --> 00:19:49,319
Alex, Alex, Alex,
Alex, Alex, Alex.
406
00:19:49,388 --> 00:19:50,754
Well, I did it.
407
00:19:50,823 --> 00:19:51,823
And it worked.
408
00:19:51,891 --> 00:19:53,023
All right! It worked!
409
00:19:53,092 --> 00:19:54,691
I almost gave that
money away six times,
410
00:19:54,760 --> 00:19:56,027
and it just didn't seem right.
411
00:19:56,095 --> 00:19:57,928
Then, this little old
lady gets into my cab.
412
00:19:57,996 --> 00:19:59,975
She's got seven kids and...
would you believe it?
413
00:19:59,999 --> 00:20:02,900
The landlady wants to shut the
heat off in their apartment.
414
00:20:02,969 --> 00:20:05,002
Unbelievable.
Well, if you'd have seen the look
415
00:20:05,071 --> 00:20:08,505
on that lady's face when I
handed her that 1,100 bucks.
416
00:20:08,574 --> 00:20:10,007
It would've knocked you out!
417
00:20:10,076 --> 00:20:11,253
All right, Alex! That's great.
418
00:20:11,277 --> 00:20:13,176
I only gave you a thousand.
419
00:20:13,245 --> 00:20:15,980
Well, a guy can chip
in, too, right?
420
00:20:16,049 --> 00:20:17,581
Aw.
421
00:20:17,650 --> 00:20:19,917
Did I tell you or
did I tell you?
422
00:20:19,986 --> 00:20:20,986
You ain't kidding, boy.
423
00:20:21,020 --> 00:20:22,819
Hey, hey,
you can give away as much money
424
00:20:22,888 --> 00:20:24,254
as you want from now on. Yeah.
425
00:20:24,323 --> 00:20:26,256
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
426
00:20:26,325 --> 00:20:28,091
A deal is a deal.
427
00:20:28,160 --> 00:20:29,460
I said I would stop
428
00:20:29,528 --> 00:20:31,429
if any one of you
didn't agree with me.
429
00:20:31,497 --> 00:20:33,230
And I haven't heard
from Louie yet.
430
00:20:33,299 --> 00:20:34,810
Oh, come on, Jim,
let's go to Mario's what are you, kidding?
431
00:20:34,834 --> 00:20:36,867
And celebrate,
and you can deal with Louie later.
432
00:20:36,935 --> 00:20:38,970
Yeah, come on, let's go.
Come on, come on!
433
00:20:40,506 --> 00:20:41,772
Hey, don't bother with Louie.
434
00:20:41,841 --> 00:20:43,440
The only thing that
guy ever enjoyed
435
00:20:43,509 --> 00:20:45,242
giving anyone was hepatitis.
436
00:20:47,313 --> 00:20:51,448
For the last time, Louie,
I'm not taking the money.
437
00:20:51,517 --> 00:20:53,584
Jeff, Jeff, I told you,
438
00:20:53,653 --> 00:20:55,953
there are no strings attached.
439
00:20:56,021 --> 00:21:00,624
I told you that I do not want
anything from you in return.
440
00:21:00,693 --> 00:21:01,725
I don't care.
441
00:21:01,794 --> 00:21:03,427
I don't want the money.
442
00:21:03,495 --> 00:21:05,930
All right.
Jim gave me the money.
443
00:21:07,032 --> 00:21:09,199
He said I had to give it away.
444
00:21:09,268 --> 00:21:11,468
He's trying to prove
some crazy point
445
00:21:11,537 --> 00:21:14,437
about how good it feels
to give away money.
446
00:21:14,506 --> 00:21:15,639
This is Jim's money?
447
00:21:15,708 --> 00:21:17,107
Yeah, it's Jim's money.
448
00:21:17,176 --> 00:21:19,310
You need it, so take
it, take it, take it,
449
00:21:19,379 --> 00:21:20,310
take it, take it!
450
00:21:20,379 --> 00:21:21,545
All right, I'll take it!
451
00:21:21,613 --> 00:21:22,780
Thank you.
452
00:21:22,849 --> 00:21:25,282
Ah, geez!
453
00:21:25,351 --> 00:21:27,751
I mean,
iggy said I'd feel great.
454
00:21:27,820 --> 00:21:30,554
I said I wouldn't feel anything.
455
00:21:30,623 --> 00:21:34,758
I never imagined that I would
feel like a sack of dirt.
456
00:21:37,630 --> 00:21:40,397
This is something.
457
00:21:40,465 --> 00:21:43,467
I mean, you couldn't believe...
458
00:21:43,536 --> 00:21:48,238
That I wanted to do
something nice for you.
459
00:21:48,307 --> 00:21:52,676
You couldn't believe
that I was capable
460
00:21:52,745 --> 00:21:56,079
of doing one decent thing.
461
00:21:56,148 --> 00:21:58,516
You could not believe
462
00:21:58,584 --> 00:22:00,750
that I thought of
you as a friend.
463
00:22:18,738 --> 00:22:20,471
Louie.
464
00:22:24,644 --> 00:22:26,577
I'm sorry.
465
00:22:28,715 --> 00:22:30,214
No, Louie, I-I mean it.
466
00:22:30,283 --> 00:22:31,548
Really.
467
00:22:31,617 --> 00:22:33,751
I'm sorry.
468
00:23:00,646 --> 00:23:03,047
Thanks.
The family will appreciate this.
469
00:23:04,149 --> 00:23:05,316
All right.
470
00:23:13,926 --> 00:23:17,060
Feels good... doesn't it, boss?
471
00:23:58,237 --> 00:23:59,769
Good night, Mr. Walters!
32142
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