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♪ Here's the story ♪
2
00:00:03,653 --> 00:00:05,553
♪ Of a lovely lady ♪
3
00:00:05,623 --> 00:00:06,938
♪ Who was bringing up ♪
4
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♪ Three very lovely girls ♪
5
00:00:09,476 --> 00:00:12,177
♪ All of them had hair of gold ♪
6
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♪ Like their mother ♪
7
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♪ The youngest one in curls ♪
8
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♪ It's the story of a
man named Brady ♪
9
00:00:21,255 --> 00:00:25,090
♪ Who was busy with
three boys of his own ♪
10
00:00:25,159 --> 00:00:28,860
♪ They were four
men living all together ♪
11
00:00:28,929 --> 00:00:31,530
♪ Yet they were all alone ♪
12
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♪ Till the one day when
the lady met this fellow ♪
13
00:00:35,719 --> 00:00:39,204
♪ And they knew that it was
much more than a hunch ♪
14
00:00:39,272 --> 00:00:43,075
♪ That this group must
somehow form a family ♪
15
00:00:43,143 --> 00:00:46,694
♪ That's the way we all
became the Brady Bunch ♪
16
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♪ The Brady Bunch ♪
17
00:00:49,116 --> 00:00:51,316
♪ The Brady Bunch ♪
18
00:00:51,384 --> 00:00:57,255
♪ That's the way we
became the Brady Bunch. ♪
19
00:01:03,330 --> 00:01:06,014
♪ ♪
20
00:01:26,553 --> 00:01:29,371
Bobby, come on!
21
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♪ ♪
22
00:02:21,175 --> 00:02:22,518
That guy's been following us
23
00:02:22,542 --> 00:02:23,822
all over the market.
24
00:02:23,877 --> 00:02:25,521
Why does he keep looking at us
25
00:02:25,545 --> 00:02:26,690
through his hands?
26
00:02:26,714 --> 00:02:29,014
Just ignore him,
and let's get going.
27
00:02:35,288 --> 00:02:36,371
Hi, there.
28
00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:39,073
Oh, you are it,
you are really it.
29
00:02:39,143 --> 00:02:40,658
We are what?
30
00:02:40,727 --> 00:02:42,960
Yeah, I've been looking
for weeks, for months.
31
00:02:43,029 --> 00:02:44,329
Oh, this is exactly right.
32
00:02:44,398 --> 00:02:45,964
The whole ball of wax.
33
00:02:47,868 --> 00:02:49,434
Uh, look, I'm a TV director.
34
00:02:49,503 --> 00:02:52,154
Here, read this
and then we'll rap.
35
00:02:52,222 --> 00:02:55,356
"Skip Farnum Film Enterprises"?
36
00:02:55,425 --> 00:02:56,535
Yeah, that's my company.
37
00:02:56,559 --> 00:02:57,570
We make commercials.
38
00:02:57,594 --> 00:02:58,527
Commercials?
39
00:02:58,595 --> 00:02:59,761
Yeah, TV commercials.
40
00:02:59,830 --> 00:03:01,112
For the big tube.
41
00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:03,092
Well, look, we want
you and your kids
42
00:03:03,116 --> 00:03:04,449
and your husband all on TV
43
00:03:04,518 --> 00:03:06,685
selling our groovy
product "Safe"...
44
00:03:06,754 --> 00:03:09,688
The greatest little
laundry soap in the world.
45
00:03:09,757 --> 00:03:12,507
Us, in a TV commercial?
46
00:03:12,576 --> 00:03:13,508
Yeah.
47
00:03:13,594 --> 00:03:15,344
Wow, that would be so much fun!
48
00:03:22,519 --> 00:03:24,469
Alice! Yeah?
49
00:03:24,537 --> 00:03:25,837
I'll help in a minute.
50
00:03:25,906 --> 00:03:27,584
I've just got to tell
Jane the fantastic news!
51
00:03:27,608 --> 00:03:29,307
Oh, no you don't! I
got the phone first!
52
00:03:29,375 --> 00:03:30,475
What fantastic news?
53
00:03:30,543 --> 00:03:31,721
Alice, you won't believe it!
54
00:03:31,745 --> 00:03:33,189
It's crazy! Wait
till I tell Mike.
55
00:03:33,213 --> 00:03:34,691
I'll believe it, I'll
believe it, what?!
56
00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:36,147
Alice, did you hear about it?
57
00:03:36,216 --> 00:03:37,860
Yeah, I heard all about it
except what it's all about.
58
00:03:37,884 --> 00:03:39,028
We're going to be on television!
59
00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:40,346
You're going to
be on television?
60
00:03:40,370 --> 00:03:42,198
Hey, you're going
to be on television?
61
00:03:42,222 --> 00:03:43,788
Yeah, we're gonna
do a commercial
62
00:03:43,857 --> 00:03:45,991
for a funny man who
looks through his hands!
63
00:03:46,060 --> 00:03:47,559
Looks through his hands?
64
00:03:51,731 --> 00:03:53,376
And you're going to
shoot the commercial
65
00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:54,877
right here in our
house, Mr. Farnum?
66
00:03:54,901 --> 00:03:57,002
Yeah, I got to lay
on a little realism...
67
00:03:57,071 --> 00:03:58,570
You know, the natural look.
68
00:03:58,638 --> 00:04:02,007
Read, enjoy... I got
to go scan the pad.
69
00:04:13,721 --> 00:04:15,988
Wow, look at the
size of that contract
70
00:04:16,056 --> 00:04:17,789
for a one-minute commercial.
71
00:04:17,858 --> 00:04:19,625
Yeah...
72
00:04:19,693 --> 00:04:23,762
You'd think we were
doing Gone with the Wind.
73
00:04:29,102 --> 00:04:32,637
Oh, groovy, man.
74
00:04:32,706 --> 00:04:34,873
Yeah.
75
00:04:40,680 --> 00:04:42,780
Who are you, pussycat?
76
00:04:42,850 --> 00:04:45,717
W-w-w-well, I'm Pussycat Alice.
77
00:04:45,785 --> 00:04:48,270
Oh, that face is, like, real.
78
00:04:48,338 --> 00:04:49,482
It's organic.
79
00:04:49,506 --> 00:04:51,389
Oh, you're definitely
80
00:04:51,457 --> 00:04:53,074
in the commercial, pussycat.
81
00:04:53,143 --> 00:04:56,978
Oh, that's who you
are... Mr. Farnum.
82
00:04:57,046 --> 00:04:58,497
Yeah.
83
00:05:00,517 --> 00:05:03,017
Uh, did Mr. Farnum go?
84
00:05:03,087 --> 00:05:05,320
Um, no, he's around
here somewhere,
85
00:05:05,389 --> 00:05:07,255
um, scanning the pad.
86
00:05:07,324 --> 00:05:10,192
Dad, I hate to be crass
about a thing like this,
87
00:05:10,260 --> 00:05:12,260
but does that contract
mention anything about loot?
88
00:05:12,329 --> 00:05:15,080
We get paid, yes.
89
00:05:15,148 --> 00:05:16,148
Out of sight.
90
00:05:16,183 --> 00:05:17,515
Is it a lot?
91
00:05:17,584 --> 00:05:20,702
Well, uh, considering
the amount of work we do,
92
00:05:20,770 --> 00:05:23,638
um, yeah, it's out of sight.
93
00:05:23,706 --> 00:05:25,173
Wow!
94
00:05:25,242 --> 00:05:26,352
Wait a minute, mister.
95
00:05:26,376 --> 00:05:27,775
The money we make
96
00:05:27,844 --> 00:05:30,461
is going into all our
savings accounts.
97
00:05:30,530 --> 00:05:33,865
Maybe we could just
have some of it now,
98
00:05:33,934 --> 00:05:35,951
for something a little special?
99
00:05:36,019 --> 00:05:38,119
Maybe just a little, Mike?
100
00:05:38,188 --> 00:05:40,955
Well, maybe a little.
101
00:05:41,024 --> 00:05:42,741
Thanks, Dad.
102
00:05:42,810 --> 00:05:44,959
Gaze on that amplifier.
103
00:05:45,028 --> 00:05:46,778
That must cost a bundle.
104
00:05:46,846 --> 00:05:50,281
Ah, maybe a couple
hundred dollars.
105
00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:51,477
You're dreaming.
106
00:05:51,501 --> 00:05:52,984
Nope, I am buying!
107
00:05:53,053 --> 00:05:54,053
With what?
108
00:05:54,120 --> 00:05:55,319
You printing your own money?
109
00:05:55,388 --> 00:05:57,249
The money we'll get for
doing the TV commercial.
110
00:05:57,273 --> 00:05:59,102
Dad said we could
have a little of it now.
111
00:05:59,126 --> 00:06:01,309
You call a couple
hundred dollars a little?
112
00:06:01,378 --> 00:06:02,660
A drop in the bucket.
113
00:06:02,729 --> 00:06:04,796
You make a fortune
on a TV commercial.
114
00:06:04,864 --> 00:06:06,598
Wow.
115
00:06:06,666 --> 00:06:09,434
I could buy that neat
electric train outfit.
116
00:06:09,503 --> 00:06:12,103
I bet I could have a minibike.
117
00:06:12,171 --> 00:06:13,949
After this commercial,
we'll do another one.
118
00:06:13,973 --> 00:06:15,339
We'll make thousands.
119
00:06:15,409 --> 00:06:16,508
Millions.
120
00:06:16,576 --> 00:06:18,309
Maybe more.
121
00:06:18,378 --> 00:06:20,946
I'm so excited about
doing the commercial.
122
00:06:21,014 --> 00:06:22,597
Me, too.
123
00:06:22,665 --> 00:06:23,998
What's the matter with me?
124
00:06:24,067 --> 00:06:26,668
I don't have dates anymore.
125
00:06:26,737 --> 00:06:30,004
Could it be my breath?
126
00:06:31,041 --> 00:06:32,991
I used to have the same trouble.
127
00:06:33,060 --> 00:06:35,093
Now I use Dazzle.
128
00:06:35,161 --> 00:06:36,839
It kills everything
in your mouth,
129
00:06:36,863 --> 00:06:38,730
including your gums.
130
00:06:38,799 --> 00:06:42,717
My trouble is my curls just
won't stand up in the rain.
131
00:06:42,785 --> 00:06:44,919
They get all frizzled.
132
00:06:44,988 --> 00:06:46,721
Next time, try Spring.
133
00:06:46,789 --> 00:06:49,557
It winds your curls up so tight,
134
00:06:49,625 --> 00:06:52,126
it lifts you right
off the ground.
135
00:06:53,263 --> 00:06:55,580
I wasn't... you.
136
00:07:05,475 --> 00:07:08,243
Oh, honey, aren't
you finished yet?
137
00:07:10,646 --> 00:07:13,248
I tell ya, I cannot
make head nor tails
138
00:07:13,316 --> 00:07:16,100
out of this show
business legal double talk.
139
00:07:16,170 --> 00:07:18,270
I think I better have
our attorney check it.
140
00:07:18,338 --> 00:07:20,483
All of that just to
sell a little soap?
141
00:07:20,507 --> 00:07:23,608
Oh, yeah, but not just
soap, honey... Safe.
142
00:07:23,677 --> 00:07:25,488
Oh, a thousand pardons, sir.
143
00:07:25,512 --> 00:07:27,723
The next time I
mention another brand,
144
00:07:27,747 --> 00:07:29,659
I'll wash my mouth
out with Safe.
145
00:07:29,683 --> 00:07:31,449
Well, to tell you the truth,
146
00:07:31,518 --> 00:07:33,285
I don't know how you tell
147
00:07:33,353 --> 00:07:35,620
all those brands
apart, you women.
148
00:07:35,689 --> 00:07:36,969
Well, it isn't easy.
149
00:07:37,023 --> 00:07:38,668
You know, we used
to use Clear and Bright
150
00:07:38,692 --> 00:07:39,835
until we found out
151
00:07:39,859 --> 00:07:41,003
it turned our water
dim and dark.
152
00:07:41,027 --> 00:07:41,959
And that's when we switched.
153
00:07:42,028 --> 00:07:44,261
To what? Help!
154
00:07:44,330 --> 00:07:46,964
Except we found out
that Help didn't help.
155
00:07:47,034 --> 00:07:50,635
And so that's when we turned
to Champ, the Dirt Fighter.
156
00:07:50,704 --> 00:07:52,136
Oh, not Champ, the Dirt Fighter.
157
00:07:53,723 --> 00:07:57,125
Yes, but we found out that
Champ couldn't take the Brady dirt
158
00:07:57,193 --> 00:07:59,461
and lost the title.
159
00:07:59,529 --> 00:08:01,963
And... don't keep
me in suspense.
160
00:08:02,031 --> 00:08:04,265
Well, then that's when
we switched to Best.
161
00:08:04,334 --> 00:08:05,750
When did you start using Safe?
162
00:08:05,819 --> 00:08:06,963
Oh, I forgot, uh...
163
00:08:06,987 --> 00:08:08,731
right between Champ and Best.
164
00:08:08,755 --> 00:08:09,937
Hold it, honey,
165
00:08:10,006 --> 00:08:13,024
you mean, we switched
from Safe to Best?
166
00:08:13,093 --> 00:08:15,577
Right, because Best is best.
167
00:08:15,646 --> 00:08:17,678
Well, yeah, but how
are we going to get up
168
00:08:17,747 --> 00:08:19,747
in front of millions
of people and lie?
169
00:08:19,816 --> 00:08:21,096
What do you mean?
170
00:08:21,151 --> 00:08:23,418
Well, look, we can't do
a commercial about Safe
171
00:08:23,487 --> 00:08:25,653
if you're still using Best.
172
00:08:25,721 --> 00:08:27,922
What, do you mean to say
173
00:08:27,991 --> 00:08:30,191
that all those people
that do commercials
174
00:08:30,260 --> 00:08:31,593
really use the products?
175
00:08:31,662 --> 00:08:34,813
Well, I don't know,
but I think they should.
176
00:08:34,881 --> 00:08:37,799
At least I think we should,
because otherwise it's a fraud.
177
00:08:37,868 --> 00:08:40,335
Gee, I never really
thought of it like that.
178
00:08:40,403 --> 00:08:41,814
You know what? What?
179
00:08:41,838 --> 00:08:43,771
I think I had better
call up Mr. Farnum
180
00:08:43,840 --> 00:08:45,773
and tell him it's off.
181
00:08:45,842 --> 00:08:47,608
Oh, Mike.
182
00:08:47,677 --> 00:08:51,212
Oh, the kids are going
to be so disappointed.
183
00:08:55,652 --> 00:08:57,585
It's a bummer.
184
00:08:57,654 --> 00:08:59,332
Yeah, we practically had
185
00:08:59,356 --> 00:09:01,790
all that money
right in our hands.
186
00:09:01,858 --> 00:09:03,257
Why would I be a fraud?
187
00:09:03,327 --> 00:09:05,893
I don't even use any
kind of laundry soap.
188
00:09:05,962 --> 00:09:07,228
That's not the point.
189
00:09:07,297 --> 00:09:08,563
If we're all in the commercial,
190
00:09:08,632 --> 00:09:11,132
it's like we're all saying
something that's not true.
191
00:09:12,636 --> 00:09:13,901
Get it?
192
00:09:13,970 --> 00:09:16,938
Gee, one minute
we're millionaires,
193
00:09:17,006 --> 00:09:19,574
the next minute
we're broke again.
194
00:09:21,478 --> 00:09:25,580
You know, Alice, I
think we set a record
195
00:09:25,649 --> 00:09:27,627
for the shortest career
in show business.
196
00:09:27,651 --> 00:09:29,083
Yeah.
197
00:09:29,152 --> 00:09:32,086
For one, brief,
shining moment there
198
00:09:32,155 --> 00:09:36,424
I was Pussycat Alice.
199
00:09:39,829 --> 00:09:41,429
Brady residence.
200
00:09:41,498 --> 00:09:43,097
Hi, Mr. Brady.
201
00:09:43,166 --> 00:09:44,999
Yeah, she's right here.
202
00:09:46,002 --> 00:09:47,868
Hi, honey.
203
00:09:47,937 --> 00:09:49,587
Carol, I just called Farnum
204
00:09:49,655 --> 00:09:51,740
to tell him the
commercial was off.
205
00:09:51,808 --> 00:09:53,720
I hope he wasn't angry with us.
206
00:09:53,744 --> 00:09:55,293
No, no, no, not at all.
207
00:09:55,361 --> 00:09:58,246
Uh, but he did tell me
something important.
208
00:09:58,314 --> 00:09:59,580
What?
209
00:09:59,649 --> 00:10:01,732
We've never used Safe.
210
00:10:01,801 --> 00:10:03,968
Honey, we went
through all that last night.
211
00:10:04,037 --> 00:10:06,120
I told you I did...
No, not this Safe.
212
00:10:06,189 --> 00:10:07,288
You used the old one.
213
00:10:07,356 --> 00:10:08,668
This is the new
and improved Safe.
214
00:10:08,692 --> 00:10:09,919
Just came on the
market last week.
215
00:10:09,943 --> 00:10:11,642
New and improved?
216
00:10:11,711 --> 00:10:13,305
Right, and if
we've never used it,
217
00:10:13,329 --> 00:10:15,096
maybe it is better than Best.
218
00:10:15,165 --> 00:10:17,966
Then we just test
them both and find out.
219
00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:19,411
That's exactly
what I was thinking.
220
00:10:19,435 --> 00:10:21,364
Then it would be perfectly
fair and honest, right?
221
00:10:21,388 --> 00:10:24,222
Right, and if Safe
washes cleaner than Best,
222
00:10:24,291 --> 00:10:25,817
we do the commercial, right?
223
00:10:25,841 --> 00:10:27,324
Yeah, right.
224
00:10:27,393 --> 00:10:28,643
Oh, that's great, honey.
225
00:10:28,711 --> 00:10:31,712
Bye.
226
00:10:31,781 --> 00:10:33,380
Alice, round up the kids.
227
00:10:33,450 --> 00:10:35,528
We've got a Brady
wash-a-thon coming up.
228
00:10:35,552 --> 00:10:36,684
A wash-a-who?
229
00:10:36,753 --> 00:10:38,030
Yeah, there's going
to be a showdown
230
00:10:38,054 --> 00:10:39,498
at the old washing machine.
231
00:10:39,522 --> 00:10:40,733
Safe against Best.
232
00:10:40,757 --> 00:10:43,891
And may the better soap win.
233
00:10:50,384 --> 00:10:52,834
Okay, now, you all know what
you're supposed to do, right?
234
00:10:52,903 --> 00:10:54,380
Right.
235
00:10:54,404 --> 00:10:56,838
Well, kids, I never
thought I'd be saying this,
236
00:10:56,907 --> 00:10:59,941
but I want you to go
outside and get dirty.
237
00:11:00,009 --> 00:11:01,120
Okay!
238
00:11:01,144 --> 00:11:02,154
All right!
239
00:11:02,178 --> 00:11:03,445
You asked for it.
240
00:11:03,513 --> 00:11:05,357
Now, Alice, you're the
only one who will know
241
00:11:05,381 --> 00:11:07,393
which clothes you
washed with which soap.
242
00:11:07,417 --> 00:11:09,028
And your lips are sealed, okay?
243
00:11:09,052 --> 00:11:15,122
Oh, sealed... Okay,
Pete, let me have it.
244
00:11:15,191 --> 00:11:16,507
My pleasure, sir.
245
00:11:25,234 --> 00:11:26,768
Okay, that ought to be enough.
246
00:11:26,836 --> 00:11:28,002
Pete, that's enough.
247
00:11:33,527 --> 00:11:35,460
Make it real mushy.
248
00:11:35,529 --> 00:11:36,627
I will.
249
00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:38,063
Okay, that looks good.
250
00:11:38,131 --> 00:11:40,932
Okay, remember, smush
it all over each other.
251
00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:41,933
Okay, ready?
252
00:11:42,001 --> 00:11:42,934
Ready. Ready.
253
00:11:43,002 --> 00:11:45,070
Get your hands in there.
254
00:11:47,874 --> 00:11:49,607
One, two, three... smush!
255
00:12:01,488 --> 00:12:02,436
Are you ready?
256
00:12:02,505 --> 00:12:03,437
Ready.
257
00:12:03,506 --> 00:12:06,507
On your mark... Get set... Go!
258
00:12:22,158 --> 00:12:23,290
Oh, hi, honey.
259
00:12:23,359 --> 00:12:25,171
You're just in time
for the judging. Mm.
260
00:12:25,195 --> 00:12:26,627
On the left is pile "A,"
261
00:12:26,696 --> 00:12:28,462
and on the right is pile "B."
262
00:12:28,531 --> 00:12:30,464
Which one do you
think is the cleanest?
263
00:12:30,533 --> 00:12:32,867
Well...
264
00:12:41,611 --> 00:12:44,061
Well, uh... Well?
265
00:12:44,130 --> 00:12:45,274
I'd say pile "A."
266
00:12:45,298 --> 00:12:47,665
Well, then, that
makes it unanimous.
267
00:12:47,733 --> 00:12:49,500
I vote for pile "A."
268
00:12:49,569 --> 00:12:51,713
Well, Alice, which
soap is Safe...
269
00:12:51,737 --> 00:12:53,271
"A" or "B"?
270
00:12:53,340 --> 00:12:58,159
The winner is... the
envelope, please.
271
00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:05,967
The winner is...
272
00:13:08,488 --> 00:13:10,087
Well, it says pile "A,"
273
00:13:10,156 --> 00:13:12,757
but I can't remember
whether pile "A"
274
00:13:12,826 --> 00:13:15,159
is Best or Safe.
275
00:13:15,228 --> 00:13:17,278
Oh, no.
276
00:13:18,732 --> 00:13:19,959
What are we gonna do about it?
277
00:13:19,983 --> 00:13:22,099
Oh, no problem, Mr. Brady.
278
00:13:22,168 --> 00:13:25,937
Kids, put your old clothes
back on and dirty up again.
279
00:13:28,224 --> 00:13:31,492
Well, this time I say pile "B."
280
00:13:31,561 --> 00:13:32,627
Pile "B."
281
00:13:32,696 --> 00:13:34,028
Unanimous again.
282
00:13:34,097 --> 00:13:38,299
Okay, the winner
is... pile "B" is Safe.
283
00:13:38,367 --> 00:13:39,901
Then we do the commercial.
284
00:13:39,970 --> 00:13:43,037
TV, here we come!
285
00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:51,045
Well, there you are, Mr. Farnum.
286
00:13:51,114 --> 00:13:53,314
We're all signed,
sealed and delivered.
287
00:13:53,382 --> 00:13:54,482
Out of sight.
288
00:13:54,550 --> 00:13:55,728
Everything checks out, Skip.
289
00:13:55,752 --> 00:13:57,029
No problems, easy to light.
290
00:13:57,053 --> 00:13:58,486
Crazy.
291
00:13:58,554 --> 00:13:59,932
Okay, you folks
study your script.
292
00:13:59,956 --> 00:14:01,467
We're gonna be here Saturday
morning bright and early
293
00:14:01,491 --> 00:14:02,657
to grind the cameras.
294
00:14:02,725 --> 00:14:04,091
Come on, man, let's split.
295
00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:05,638
Hey, now, listen,
are you sure...? Uh...
296
00:14:05,662 --> 00:14:07,261
Mr. Farnum, excuse me.
297
00:14:07,330 --> 00:14:09,363
Uh, do you think we
might get a chance
298
00:14:09,432 --> 00:14:10,598
to rehearse the script?
299
00:14:10,667 --> 00:14:11,766
Yeah, 'cause, you know,
300
00:14:11,834 --> 00:14:12,978
we've never done this before.
301
00:14:13,002 --> 00:14:14,146
Hey, come on, cool it, man.
302
00:14:14,170 --> 00:14:15,314
Listen, don't
worry about a thing.
303
00:14:15,338 --> 00:14:16,482
You just learn those lines
304
00:14:16,506 --> 00:14:17,650
and leave the rehearsing to me.
305
00:14:17,674 --> 00:14:18,972
Ciao.
306
00:14:19,041 --> 00:14:20,073
Right this way, Skip.
307
00:14:20,142 --> 00:14:21,408
Yeah, cool.
308
00:14:23,946 --> 00:14:26,114
Hey, that "no rehearsal"
bit is just great.
309
00:14:26,182 --> 00:14:28,116
You really got it up here, Skip.
310
00:14:28,184 --> 00:14:29,996
Man, I got it everywhere.
311
00:14:30,020 --> 00:14:31,952
And it's a real
natural family, too.
312
00:14:32,022 --> 00:14:33,587
Cool. And that's the way
313
00:14:33,656 --> 00:14:35,501
they're going to stay, dig?
314
00:14:35,525 --> 00:14:37,775
I'm getting cold feet.
315
00:14:37,844 --> 00:14:39,143
Cold feet?
316
00:14:39,211 --> 00:14:41,690
Yeah, have you read this thing?
317
00:14:41,714 --> 00:14:43,559
Boy, that's not going to be easy
318
00:14:43,583 --> 00:14:46,684
doing all this that we're
supposed to be doing.
319
00:14:46,753 --> 00:14:49,153
You mean holding
up a box of soap?
320
00:14:49,221 --> 00:14:50,499
No, I mean holding it up
321
00:14:50,523 --> 00:14:53,841
and not looking
like we're... stupid.
322
00:14:57,597 --> 00:15:00,364
I wonder... What?
323
00:15:00,433 --> 00:15:01,444
You know Laura's cousin
324
00:15:01,468 --> 00:15:02,884
is an actress... Mierna Carter?
325
00:15:02,952 --> 00:15:04,351
Oh, yeah, Myrna.
326
00:15:04,420 --> 00:15:06,253
No, she calls herself "Mierna."
327
00:15:06,322 --> 00:15:09,524
Well, she's not important
or anything like that,
328
00:15:09,592 --> 00:15:11,392
but why couldn't we call her
329
00:15:11,460 --> 00:15:13,261
and ask her for a few tips?
330
00:15:13,329 --> 00:15:14,609
Great. Call her.
331
00:15:14,664 --> 00:15:16,864
Come on, call her.
332
00:15:16,932 --> 00:15:18,811
Hi, honey.
333
00:15:18,835 --> 00:15:20,045
Here's that box of Safe
334
00:15:20,069 --> 00:15:21,447
you wanted from the market.
335
00:15:21,471 --> 00:15:22,603
Thanks, dear.
336
00:15:22,672 --> 00:15:23,771
And just in time.
337
00:15:23,840 --> 00:15:25,773
I was down to my
last cupful of Safe.
338
00:15:25,842 --> 00:15:27,122
So was the market.
339
00:15:27,176 --> 00:15:29,421
Safe really outsells
all other brands.
340
00:15:29,445 --> 00:15:32,446
That's because Safe cleans
all things better all ways.
341
00:15:32,515 --> 00:15:34,482
I just couldn't do without Safe.
342
00:15:34,550 --> 00:15:36,917
It's the only brand
I feel safe with.
343
00:15:42,091 --> 00:15:43,791
No, no...
344
00:15:43,860 --> 00:15:47,078
Kids, I'm sorry,
but it's all wrong.
345
00:15:47,147 --> 00:15:49,280
Oh, Mierna, I'm so
glad we called you.
346
00:15:49,348 --> 00:15:50,782
Would you please
tell us what to do?
347
00:15:50,850 --> 00:15:52,199
Yeah, what's wrong?
348
00:15:52,268 --> 00:15:54,163
Well, you know,
you're just reading it.
349
00:15:54,187 --> 00:15:56,654
No one's going to believe
it, you know what I mean?
350
00:15:56,723 --> 00:15:59,106
Um, you're not motivated.
351
00:15:59,175 --> 00:16:00,474
Motivated?
352
00:16:00,543 --> 00:16:01,620
Yeah.
353
00:16:01,644 --> 00:16:03,160
How do you mean?
354
00:16:03,229 --> 00:16:05,412
Oh, well, um, I mean...
355
00:16:05,481 --> 00:16:07,748
like what's your attitude
when you say your lines?
356
00:16:07,817 --> 00:16:08,916
What are you thinking?
357
00:16:08,985 --> 00:16:10,818
How do you... how do you feel?
358
00:16:10,887 --> 00:16:12,597
You know, about
what you're saying?
359
00:16:12,621 --> 00:16:14,755
I never thought of all that.
360
00:16:14,824 --> 00:16:16,104
I didn't, either.
361
00:16:16,158 --> 00:16:17,438
That's important?
362
00:16:17,493 --> 00:16:18,826
Important?
363
00:16:18,895 --> 00:16:22,046
Oh, wow, like... like,
motivation is everything.
364
00:16:22,114 --> 00:16:23,648
I mean, it's what gives
365
00:16:23,717 --> 00:16:26,900
the meaning and the
emotion to acting, you know?
366
00:16:26,969 --> 00:16:28,252
Could we try it again?
367
00:16:28,320 --> 00:16:30,688
Oh, sure, sure, sure, sure.
368
00:16:30,757 --> 00:16:32,923
What you're saying...
369
00:16:32,992 --> 00:16:35,426
Michael, Michael, um...
370
00:16:35,495 --> 00:16:38,496
Michael, you think
about it this way:
371
00:16:38,565 --> 00:16:42,132
You think about all
the guys at your office
372
00:16:42,201 --> 00:16:43,512
and how they've been telling you
373
00:16:43,536 --> 00:16:45,214
how great your shirts look.
374
00:16:45,238 --> 00:16:47,204
Mike, how clean.
375
00:16:47,273 --> 00:16:49,567
And that makes you
proud, Mike, proud,
376
00:16:49,591 --> 00:16:51,951
because you know
it's because of Safe.
377
00:16:51,994 --> 00:16:53,460
You see, Mike?
378
00:16:53,529 --> 00:16:56,297
That's the motivation that
gives you the attitude, right?
379
00:16:56,365 --> 00:16:57,731
Yeah, right, yeah.
380
00:16:57,800 --> 00:17:00,301
Okay, okay, so you think
about being at the office.
381
00:17:00,369 --> 00:17:01,649
Yeah, yeah.
382
00:17:01,704 --> 00:17:05,606
And, Carol, Carol,
you're thinking...
383
00:17:05,675 --> 00:17:08,075
you're thinking, "Wow,
384
00:17:08,144 --> 00:17:11,245
he brought me a
box of that stuff."
385
00:17:11,314 --> 00:17:13,247
And that makes you happy
386
00:17:13,316 --> 00:17:14,994
because your husband's proud
387
00:17:15,018 --> 00:17:17,835
of the way you wash his shirts.
388
00:17:17,904 --> 00:17:19,369
See?
389
00:17:19,439 --> 00:17:20,538
Okay, I'll try.
390
00:17:20,606 --> 00:17:21,683
Good, good, good.
391
00:17:21,707 --> 00:17:23,385
And remember, lots of energy.
392
00:17:23,409 --> 00:17:24,586
Keep it up there
393
00:17:24,610 --> 00:17:26,738
because acting
is bigger than life.
394
00:17:26,762 --> 00:17:29,629
Listen, Myrna... Mierna. Mierna.
395
00:17:29,698 --> 00:17:33,233
Uh, Mierna, I don't
think I can do this.
396
00:17:33,302 --> 00:17:35,269
Oh, no, no, no.
397
00:17:35,338 --> 00:17:37,171
You're doing fine.
398
00:17:37,240 --> 00:17:38,973
You're getting it.
Really, you are.
399
00:17:39,041 --> 00:17:41,075
Hey, Mike... Mike,
the seed is there.
400
00:17:41,143 --> 00:17:43,277
All you have to do is
let it grow, you know?
401
00:17:43,346 --> 00:17:44,611
Let it grow, right?
402
00:17:44,680 --> 00:17:45,824
Okay, now let's try it again.
403
00:17:45,848 --> 00:17:47,014
And remember,
404
00:17:47,083 --> 00:17:49,349
up there, energy,
bigger than life.
405
00:17:49,418 --> 00:17:50,468
Okay?
406
00:17:50,536 --> 00:17:52,870
Yeah, okay. Come on.
407
00:17:57,877 --> 00:17:59,309
Hi, honey.
408
00:17:59,378 --> 00:18:01,439
Here's that box
of Safe you wanted
409
00:18:01,463 --> 00:18:02,743
from the office.
410
00:18:02,815 --> 00:18:04,515
Uh, the market.
411
00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:07,852
Thanks, dear and just in time!
412
00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:11,255
I was down to my
last cupful of Safe.
413
00:18:11,324 --> 00:18:12,601
So was the market.
414
00:18:12,625 --> 00:18:16,427
Boy, it really outsells
all other brands.
415
00:18:16,496 --> 00:18:18,930
Good, good, good,
good, that's really good.
416
00:18:18,998 --> 00:18:20,409
Only, a little bit
bigger, though.
417
00:18:20,433 --> 00:18:21,811
Because you gotta... you
gotta grab that audience,
418
00:18:21,835 --> 00:18:22,978
you know what I mean? Bigger?
419
00:18:23,002 --> 00:18:24,101
Yes. One more time now.
420
00:18:24,170 --> 00:18:25,102
Come on.
421
00:18:25,171 --> 00:18:26,103
Okay.
422
00:18:26,172 --> 00:18:27,283
Give me my Safe.
423
00:18:27,307 --> 00:18:28,605
Hi, honey.
424
00:18:28,674 --> 00:18:29,941
Here's the box of Safe
425
00:18:30,009 --> 00:18:31,709
that you wanted from the market.
426
00:18:31,777 --> 00:18:33,911
Hmm, motivation, huh?
427
00:18:33,980 --> 00:18:35,646
Bigger than life, hmm?
428
00:18:35,715 --> 00:18:39,283
I think I'm going to
try some of that myself.
429
00:18:39,352 --> 00:18:40,495
Parents, kids...
430
00:18:40,519 --> 00:18:41,997
Housekeeper. Housekeeper, yeah.
431
00:18:42,021 --> 00:18:44,233
In that order: parents,
kids, housekeeper.
432
00:18:44,257 --> 00:18:45,500
Groovy. Okay, good.
433
00:18:45,524 --> 00:18:46,657
Okay, now, team.
434
00:18:46,726 --> 00:18:48,304
I want you to listen to
what I'm laying down.
435
00:18:48,328 --> 00:18:49,905
Now, love, you're over
there at the counter,
436
00:18:49,929 --> 00:18:51,307
see, you're making
with the greenery.
437
00:18:51,331 --> 00:18:52,996
Then, pops, you
come flipping in,
438
00:18:53,065 --> 00:18:54,743
and you lay this box of
flakes on the little lady,
439
00:18:54,767 --> 00:18:56,077
then you have a
little rap session,
440
00:18:56,101 --> 00:18:57,301
and then we cut, dig?
441
00:18:57,370 --> 00:18:58,514
I think so. Groovy.
442
00:18:58,538 --> 00:18:59,548
Excuse me, Mr. Farnum,
443
00:18:59,572 --> 00:19:00,949
but when do we get to rehearse?
444
00:19:00,973 --> 00:19:02,390
Oh, we're not going to rehearse.
445
00:19:02,458 --> 00:19:03,741
Oh, don't worry.
446
00:19:03,809 --> 00:19:05,120
Now trust me, pussycat,
it's just going to be great.
447
00:19:05,144 --> 00:19:06,410
Just going to be great.
448
00:19:06,479 --> 00:19:07,411
Here, you stand over here.
449
00:19:07,480 --> 00:19:08,523
Now just trust me.
450
00:19:08,547 --> 00:19:09,591
Groovy, groovy.
451
00:19:09,615 --> 00:19:11,648
Oh... my rock.
452
00:19:11,717 --> 00:19:13,283
Come on, let's make film.
453
00:19:13,353 --> 00:19:16,220
Let me check the shot.
454
00:19:21,477 --> 00:19:22,660
Yeah, groovy.
455
00:19:22,729 --> 00:19:25,095
Okay, let's crank one up.
456
00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:27,231
Okay, kids, right in there.
457
00:19:27,299 --> 00:19:28,699
Rolling.
458
00:19:28,768 --> 00:19:29,800
Speed.
459
00:19:29,869 --> 00:19:31,802
Action.
460
00:19:33,205 --> 00:19:35,484
Hi, honey.
461
00:19:35,508 --> 00:19:36,874
Here's that box of Safe
462
00:19:36,942 --> 00:19:39,154
that you wanted from the market.
463
00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:43,414
Wow... And just in time.
464
00:19:43,483 --> 00:19:47,351
I was down to my
last cupful of Safe!
465
00:19:50,590 --> 00:19:51,205
Cut!
466
00:19:51,274 --> 00:19:53,056
Stop.
467
00:19:53,125 --> 00:19:54,775
Stop, stop.
468
00:19:54,844 --> 00:19:57,227
What was that?
469
00:19:57,296 --> 00:19:59,480
I mean, where's
that Mrs. America
470
00:19:59,549 --> 00:20:01,059
that I dug in the parking lot?
471
00:20:01,083 --> 00:20:03,167
And you, pops, my rock.
472
00:20:03,236 --> 00:20:05,970
Man, you look like you
flew in from a feather factory.
473
00:20:06,038 --> 00:20:08,505
I was motivating.
474
00:20:08,575 --> 00:20:10,886
I was thinking of
the boys in the office.
475
00:20:10,910 --> 00:20:12,393
What boys in the office?
476
00:20:12,461 --> 00:20:14,039
The ones who keep telling me
477
00:20:14,063 --> 00:20:15,429
how clean my shirts are.
478
00:20:15,498 --> 00:20:16,596
Yeah, and I was thinking,
479
00:20:16,665 --> 00:20:19,566
"Wow, he brought
me a box of that stuff."
480
00:20:19,635 --> 00:20:21,969
Oh, you're putting me on, right?
481
00:20:22,038 --> 00:20:24,366
Well, I was working
on an attitude.
482
00:20:24,390 --> 00:20:25,572
Me, too.
483
00:20:25,641 --> 00:20:26,840
Attitude?
484
00:20:26,909 --> 00:20:29,510
Well, I'll give you
an attitude: relax.
485
00:20:29,579 --> 00:20:31,695
Look, come in here
for one minute, will you?
486
00:20:31,764 --> 00:20:34,131
Just go in there
and cool it, all right?
487
00:20:34,199 --> 00:20:36,600
Now just unwind, just
sit down and unwind,
488
00:20:36,669 --> 00:20:40,271
and I'll get back
to you in a minute.
489
00:20:40,340 --> 00:20:42,200
Hey, man, are the kids ready?
490
00:20:42,224 --> 00:20:43,369
The kids are
ready, Skip. Groovy.
491
00:20:43,393 --> 00:20:45,158
All right, let's move
it, now, in a hurry.
492
00:20:45,227 --> 00:20:46,460
Are the kids ready?
493
00:20:46,529 --> 00:20:47,906
Ready! All right, let's move it.
494
00:20:47,930 --> 00:20:49,241
I don't know what happens
when you put a camera
495
00:20:49,265 --> 00:20:50,542
on a bunch of squares...
They just flip out.
496
00:20:50,566 --> 00:20:51,699
Baby, baby, just cool it.
497
00:20:51,768 --> 00:20:53,545
It's going to be fine.
Yeah, okay, okay.
498
00:20:53,569 --> 00:20:54,668
Okay, great, great.
499
00:20:54,737 --> 00:20:56,670
Okay, kids, be ready now.
500
00:20:56,739 --> 00:20:57,838
All right.
501
00:20:57,907 --> 00:20:59,050
Rolling.
502
00:20:59,074 --> 00:21:00,007
Speed.
503
00:21:00,075 --> 00:21:01,224
Action.
504
00:21:09,084 --> 00:21:10,735
Cut, cut, cut!
505
00:21:10,803 --> 00:21:14,588
Kids, what's with all this dirt?
506
00:21:14,656 --> 00:21:17,208
We were supposed to be
out playing, Mr. Farnum.
507
00:21:17,276 --> 00:21:18,725
In a swamp?
508
00:21:18,794 --> 00:21:22,479
Well, we made ourselves
extra dirty on purpose.
509
00:21:22,548 --> 00:21:25,299
Yeah, 'cause we know
Safe cleans anything!
510
00:21:26,602 --> 00:21:28,102
We were motivated.
511
00:21:28,170 --> 00:21:30,137
Motiv... oh, man.
512
00:21:30,206 --> 00:21:32,256
Nobody up there digs me.
513
00:21:33,559 --> 00:21:34,839
Come on, out, out.
514
00:21:34,876 --> 00:21:36,020
Get out now, now.
515
00:21:36,044 --> 00:21:37,522
Get yourself cleaned up.
516
00:21:37,546 --> 00:21:39,524
Now, dirty okay, but blech, no.
517
00:21:39,548 --> 00:21:41,315
Out, come on, come on.
518
00:21:41,383 --> 00:21:43,817
Let's go, let's go, out.
519
00:21:43,885 --> 00:21:45,029
Hey, man, the housekeeper.
520
00:21:45,053 --> 00:21:46,153
Is the housekeeper ready?
521
00:21:46,222 --> 00:21:47,665
Housekeeper's ready, Skip.
522
00:21:47,689 --> 00:21:49,033
All right, let's move it
back. Come on, move it.
523
00:21:49,057 --> 00:21:50,368
Is the housekeeper ready?
524
00:21:50,392 --> 00:21:51,625
Come on, let's go, let's go.
525
00:21:51,693 --> 00:21:53,037
It's costing bread,
don't you understand?
526
00:21:53,061 --> 00:21:54,995
Take it easy,
Skip. Okay, all right,
527
00:21:55,063 --> 00:21:56,396
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
528
00:21:56,465 --> 00:21:59,010
All right, housekeeper,
be ready now. Be ready.
529
00:21:59,034 --> 00:22:00,212
Ready. Rolling.
530
00:22:00,236 --> 00:22:01,236
Speed.
531
00:22:01,304 --> 00:22:02,619
Action.
532
00:22:13,332 --> 00:22:17,451
Oh, no, no, stop, stop, cut!
533
00:22:17,520 --> 00:22:18,902
Did I do something wrong?
534
00:22:18,971 --> 00:22:21,372
What was that, the
dance of the good fairy?
535
00:22:21,441 --> 00:22:23,140
And what's with that spaghetti?
536
00:22:23,209 --> 00:22:24,353
Look, I was motivating.
537
00:22:24,377 --> 00:22:25,709
Motivating!
538
00:22:25,778 --> 00:22:27,856
Well, I figured that Safe
washed clothes so fast
539
00:22:27,880 --> 00:22:30,240
I had time to go to
the beauty parlor.
540
00:22:31,817 --> 00:22:35,686
Okay... now I'm motivating.
541
00:22:35,754 --> 00:22:37,766
Everybody, everybody
come in here, please.
542
00:22:37,790 --> 00:22:39,139
Everybody in here.
543
00:22:42,561 --> 00:22:45,662
Now, look, I want you to
know that this whole gig is off.
544
00:22:45,731 --> 00:22:48,865
Kaput! I mean, the
whole thing is a washout.
545
00:22:51,119 --> 00:22:53,487
My nice, natural family is
just a bunch of ding-a-lings.
546
00:22:53,556 --> 00:22:55,534
We were only trying to
be helpful, Mr. Farnum.
547
00:22:55,558 --> 00:22:56,990
We took some acting lessons.
548
00:22:57,059 --> 00:22:58,537
We just wanted to
be bigger than life.
549
00:22:58,561 --> 00:23:00,205
Well, you'll be bigger,
but not in my life.
550
00:23:00,229 --> 00:23:01,261
Now come on, get out.
551
00:23:01,330 --> 00:23:02,474
Out. Out of my
house. All of you.
552
00:23:02,498 --> 00:23:03,430
This is my house.
553
00:23:03,499 --> 00:23:04,764
Hmm? Oh.
554
00:23:04,833 --> 00:23:07,267
Come on, man, let's split.
555
00:23:07,336 --> 00:23:08,268
Wrap it up.
556
00:23:08,337 --> 00:23:09,548
Hey, wait a minute.
557
00:23:09,572 --> 00:23:11,572
You know, this whole
scene reminds me
558
00:23:11,640 --> 00:23:13,874
of that horrible actress
we worked with?
559
00:23:13,942 --> 00:23:15,487
What was...? Mierna Carter.
560
00:23:15,511 --> 00:23:16,655
That's the nut... Myrna Carter!
561
00:23:16,679 --> 00:23:17,959
No, Mierna.
562
00:23:18,013 --> 00:23:19,624
Mierna, Myrna, I don't care!
563
00:23:19,648 --> 00:23:22,128
She blew my mind back there...!
564
00:23:35,047 --> 00:23:37,492
Alice, would you come
here a minute, please?
565
00:23:37,516 --> 00:23:38,849
I still don't understand
566
00:23:38,917 --> 00:23:40,862
this special
delivery letter I got.
567
00:23:40,886 --> 00:23:41,986
It must be quite a letter.
568
00:23:42,054 --> 00:23:43,153
I think you've read it
569
00:23:43,222 --> 00:23:44,532
at least six times
since this morning.
570
00:23:44,556 --> 00:23:46,368
Well, would you sit
down and listen to this?
571
00:23:46,392 --> 00:23:48,703
"In compliance with our
contractual agreement,
572
00:23:48,727 --> 00:23:50,205
"Skip Farnum Film Enterprises
573
00:23:50,229 --> 00:23:52,040
"will meet its
obligation of payment.
574
00:23:52,064 --> 00:23:53,630
"As to manner of payment,
575
00:23:53,699 --> 00:23:56,149
we refer you to
Section 12, Article C,
576
00:23:56,218 --> 00:23:58,652
Paragraph 42 of contract."
577
00:23:58,721 --> 00:24:00,031
Now what do you
suppose they mean
578
00:24:00,055 --> 00:24:01,422
by "manner of payment"?
579
00:24:01,490 --> 00:24:03,924
Sorry, Hungarian
goulash I understand.
580
00:24:03,992 --> 00:24:05,926
Legal goulash I don't.
581
00:24:05,994 --> 00:24:07,472
Well, I guess we'll
just have to wait
582
00:24:07,496 --> 00:24:08,640
for Mr. Brady to get home.
583
00:24:08,664 --> 00:24:09,996
Maybe he'll know.
584
00:24:16,005 --> 00:24:18,022
What in the world...?
585
00:24:18,090 --> 00:24:20,407
One of you Mrs. Brady?
586
00:24:20,476 --> 00:24:21,875
I'm Mrs. Brady.
587
00:24:21,944 --> 00:24:23,827
Got a delivery for you.
588
00:24:23,896 --> 00:24:27,113
I don't remember
ordering anything.
589
00:24:27,182 --> 00:24:29,950
Maybe Mr. Brady did.
590
00:24:30,018 --> 00:24:35,989
Excuse me... Sign here.
591
00:24:37,460 --> 00:24:39,526
What am I signing for?
592
00:24:39,595 --> 00:24:42,112
It's from Farnum
Film Enterprises.
593
00:24:42,181 --> 00:24:44,297
Safe laundry soap.
594
00:24:47,586 --> 00:24:49,686
Guess what they meant
by "manner of payment"?
595
00:24:49,755 --> 00:24:51,522
48 boxes of soap?
596
00:24:51,591 --> 00:24:53,040
Down, Harry.
597
00:24:53,109 --> 00:24:54,474
48 boxes?
598
00:24:54,543 --> 00:24:58,012
Lady, you got
2,000 boxes coming.
599
00:25:02,618 --> 00:25:04,101
Where do you want them?
600
00:25:06,872 --> 00:25:08,884
Where do you want them, lady?
601
00:25:08,908 --> 00:25:12,509
Oh, Alice.
38286
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