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♪ Here's the story ♪
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♪ Of a lovely lady ♪
3
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♪ Who was bringing up ♪
4
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♪ Three very lovely girls ♪
5
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♪ All of them had hair of gold ♪
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♪ Like their mother ♪
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♪ The youngest one in curls ♪
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♪ It's the story of a
man named Brady ♪
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♪ Who was busy with
three boys of his own ♪
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♪ They were four
men living all together ♪
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♪ Yet they were all alone ♪
12
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♪ Till the one day when
the lady met this fellow ♪
13
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♪ And they knew that it was
much more than a hunch ♪
14
00:00:39,239 --> 00:00:43,041
♪ That this group must
somehow form a family ♪
15
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♪ That's the way we all
became the Brady Bunch ♪
16
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♪ The Brady Bunch ♪
17
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♪ The Brady Bunch ♪
18
00:00:51,351 --> 00:00:57,221
♪ That's the way we
became the Brady Bunch. ♪
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♪ ♪
20
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♪ ♪
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Greg, watch the...
22
00:01:52,179 --> 00:01:53,745
watch out for the wagon now.
23
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Don't go on the grass.
24
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How did I do?
25
00:02:05,526 --> 00:02:06,791
Well, you did fine.
26
00:02:06,860 --> 00:02:07,959
I'm proud of you.
27
00:02:08,028 --> 00:02:09,305
You really mean it?
28
00:02:09,329 --> 00:02:12,330
Anybody who can navigate
the Brady obstacle course
29
00:02:12,399 --> 00:02:14,699
without a major collision
is ready for anything.
30
00:02:14,768 --> 00:02:16,345
I hope I do as well tomorrow
31
00:02:16,369 --> 00:02:18,849
when I take that driver's test.
32
00:02:19,189 --> 00:02:21,523
No, you'll do fine.
33
00:02:31,051 --> 00:02:32,331
I wish you kids
34
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would keep your junk
out of the driveway.
35
00:02:34,321 --> 00:02:35,420
"Kids"?
36
00:02:35,489 --> 00:02:37,455
Look who's calling who "kids."
37
00:02:37,524 --> 00:02:38,851
When you're old
enough to drive a car,
38
00:02:38,875 --> 00:02:40,308
you're not a kid anymore.
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00:02:40,377 --> 00:02:41,727
Oh, big man.
40
00:02:41,795 --> 00:02:43,027
Look, for your information,
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00:02:43,096 --> 00:02:45,108
they don't give a
license to just anybody.
42
00:02:45,132 --> 00:02:46,375
And in 24 hours,
43
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I'm going to have one that says
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00:02:47,901 --> 00:02:50,196
"Greg Brady, qualified driver."
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If you pass the test.
46
00:02:56,159 --> 00:02:59,344
He can't even
unbuckle his seat belt.
47
00:02:59,413 --> 00:03:00,562
Great driver.
48
00:03:07,337 --> 00:03:08,453
Oh, you've got it.
49
00:03:08,522 --> 00:03:09,832
I've been looking
all over for it.
50
00:03:09,856 --> 00:03:11,334
Oh, boy, there sure
are a lot of rules
51
00:03:11,358 --> 00:03:12,502
and regulations.
52
00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:14,070
You got to know this
whole thing exactly.
53
00:03:14,094 --> 00:03:15,488
Even if I could
learn the written part,
54
00:03:15,512 --> 00:03:16,656
I'd still have a problem.
55
00:03:16,680 --> 00:03:17,779
Why's that?
56
00:03:17,847 --> 00:03:19,447
I don't know how to drive.
57
00:03:19,516 --> 00:03:20,643
You mean you've never driven?
58
00:03:20,667 --> 00:03:22,167
Only shopping carts.
59
00:03:22,236 --> 00:03:24,836
Over 100,000 miles,
only one accident.
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00:03:24,905 --> 00:03:25,954
If you want to learn,
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00:03:26,023 --> 00:03:27,122
I could teach you easily.
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00:03:27,191 --> 00:03:28,335
Oh, you really think so?
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00:03:28,359 --> 00:03:29,458
Oh, sure. Come on.
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00:03:29,526 --> 00:03:30,837
Yeah. We'll use these. Okay.
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00:03:30,861 --> 00:03:32,839
This will be the
driver seat. All right.
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00:03:32,863 --> 00:03:34,463
The passenger seat.
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00:03:34,531 --> 00:03:36,343
I'll fasten my seat belt, huh?
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00:03:37,868 --> 00:03:39,134
Okay.
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00:03:39,203 --> 00:03:40,413
This will be your
steering wheel.
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00:03:40,437 --> 00:03:42,531
Oh, that is some
classy steering wheel.
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00:03:42,555 --> 00:03:43,867
Hold it.
72
00:03:43,891 --> 00:03:44,823
What's the matter?
73
00:03:44,892 --> 00:03:46,172
You forgot to
turn on the engine.
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00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:47,659
Oh, I'm sorry.
75
00:03:47,728 --> 00:03:50,328
Huh, ah, ah, ah...
Hold it. Hold it.
76
00:03:50,397 --> 00:03:51,541
What's the matter now?
77
00:03:51,565 --> 00:03:52,876
You can't just pull
away from the curb
78
00:03:52,900 --> 00:03:54,132
without checking behind you.
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00:03:54,201 --> 00:03:55,712
You have a rearview mirror
up here and over there,
80
00:03:55,736 --> 00:03:56,880
and check over your shoulder.
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00:03:56,904 --> 00:03:58,381
Eh, eh, eh, all right. Now...
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00:04:02,175 --> 00:04:03,319
That's a nice, quiet engine.
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00:04:03,343 --> 00:04:04,442
You're doing fine.
84
00:04:04,511 --> 00:04:05,443
Thank you.
85
00:04:05,512 --> 00:04:06,778
You better watch it now, Alice.
86
00:04:06,847 --> 00:04:08,013
You're on the freeway.
87
00:04:08,082 --> 00:04:09,492
Freeway? Oh, no,
you don't catch me...
88
00:04:09,516 --> 00:04:10,949
Alice, hang onto the wheel.
89
00:04:13,587 --> 00:04:15,621
Look out!
90
00:04:15,689 --> 00:04:17,550
What are you doing, Alice?
91
00:04:17,574 --> 00:04:19,641
I'm driving.
92
00:04:19,710 --> 00:04:21,660
In the kitchen?
93
00:04:21,728 --> 00:04:23,811
No, on the freeway.
94
00:04:25,982 --> 00:04:28,516
It's my first driving lesson.
95
00:04:28,585 --> 00:04:31,102
We'd better get out of here.
96
00:04:31,171 --> 00:04:34,873
Yeah. This is no
place for pedestrians.
97
00:04:42,082 --> 00:04:43,960
I thought I heard
the car drive up.
98
00:04:43,984 --> 00:04:45,445
What's taking Greg so long?
99
00:04:45,469 --> 00:04:46,968
There will be no living with him
100
00:04:47,037 --> 00:04:48,553
once he gets his license.
101
00:04:48,621 --> 00:04:49,721
Well, look, Marcia,
102
00:04:49,790 --> 00:04:51,134
I wouldn't tease
him if I were you.
103
00:04:51,158 --> 00:04:52,535
I mean, you're going to
be getting your license
104
00:04:52,559 --> 00:04:53,758
in another year or two.
105
00:04:53,827 --> 00:04:55,839
Boy, they'll give a
license to anybody.
106
00:04:55,863 --> 00:04:56,961
Is that so?
107
00:04:57,030 --> 00:04:58,591
Yeah. Cool it.
108
00:04:59,983 --> 00:05:01,182
Hi, Greg.
109
00:05:01,251 --> 00:05:02,771
Hi.
110
00:05:02,819 --> 00:05:05,487
Oh, uh, Dad had to
go back to the office.
111
00:05:05,555 --> 00:05:08,189
He said he'd be
home in time for dinner.
112
00:05:08,258 --> 00:05:10,875
You don't have to tell us, Greg.
113
00:05:10,944 --> 00:05:14,111
We can tell by the
look on your face.
114
00:05:16,149 --> 00:05:17,827
A lot of people don't pass
115
00:05:17,851 --> 00:05:19,283
the first time, honey.
116
00:05:19,352 --> 00:05:21,953
What did the man say?
117
00:05:22,022 --> 00:05:26,191
The man... said
to show you this.
118
00:05:28,528 --> 00:05:29,648
Oh, you!
119
00:05:29,696 --> 00:05:31,295
It's your license.
120
00:05:31,364 --> 00:05:33,148
Congratulations!
121
00:05:34,217 --> 00:05:36,162
Boy, that was pretty sneaky
122
00:05:36,186 --> 00:05:37,618
putting us on like that.
123
00:05:37,687 --> 00:05:39,787
But we'll let you drive
us around anyway.
124
00:05:39,856 --> 00:05:41,167
Yeah, congratulations.
125
00:05:41,191 --> 00:05:42,290
Thanks.
126
00:05:42,359 --> 00:05:43,492
Oh, that's great.
127
00:05:43,560 --> 00:05:44,804
Well, look, you
know, I promised you
128
00:05:44,828 --> 00:05:46,172
you can drive my
car once in a while,
129
00:05:46,196 --> 00:05:48,007
and I'm sure your father
will let you drive his, too.
130
00:05:48,031 --> 00:05:49,180
You and Dad don't have
131
00:05:49,249 --> 00:05:50,465
to worry about that anymore.
132
00:05:50,534 --> 00:05:51,678
What do you mean?
133
00:05:51,702 --> 00:05:53,134
Now that I'm an official driver,
134
00:05:53,203 --> 00:05:54,803
I'll buy a car of my own.
135
00:05:54,871 --> 00:05:57,672
A car of your own!
136
00:05:59,709 --> 00:06:02,643
I don't know which of
these cars I'd rather have.
137
00:06:02,712 --> 00:06:04,478
Boy, are you a dreamer.
138
00:06:04,547 --> 00:06:06,692
Yeah, what are you
going to use for money?
139
00:06:06,716 --> 00:06:08,649
This convertible is groovy.
140
00:06:08,718 --> 00:06:10,529
But the hardtop
is pretty sharp, too.
141
00:06:10,553 --> 00:06:12,821
Why don't you get them
both, Mr. Moneybags?
142
00:06:12,889 --> 00:06:15,489
You guys think I'm
kidding about getting a car?
143
00:06:15,558 --> 00:06:17,703
If you're not, you're nuts.
144
00:06:17,727 --> 00:06:20,161
Just to prove it... Peter,
you know my bike?
145
00:06:20,230 --> 00:06:21,495
Yeah. What about it?
146
00:06:21,564 --> 00:06:23,142
Now that I'll be
getting a car of my own,
147
00:06:23,166 --> 00:06:24,833
I won't need the bike anymore.
148
00:06:24,901 --> 00:06:25,834
You can have it.
149
00:06:25,902 --> 00:06:27,501
I can? Sure.
150
00:06:27,570 --> 00:06:28,870
What's the catch?
151
00:06:28,939 --> 00:06:31,172
Can't a guy perform a
simple act of generosity
152
00:06:31,241 --> 00:06:32,673
without being suspected?
153
00:06:32,742 --> 00:06:34,675
Boy, I always said
you were the greatest.
154
00:06:34,744 --> 00:06:35,844
Didn't I, Bobby?
155
00:06:35,912 --> 00:06:38,512
No. Just this morning...
Who asked you?
156
00:06:38,581 --> 00:06:39,680
Thanks, Greg.
157
00:06:39,749 --> 00:06:41,182
Think nothing of it.
158
00:06:42,202 --> 00:06:43,368
Hi, Dad.
159
00:06:43,437 --> 00:06:44,969
Hi.
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00:06:45,038 --> 00:06:47,472
Say, I hear you've been
talking about buying a car.
161
00:06:47,541 --> 00:06:48,773
Yeah, I figured why should I
162
00:06:48,842 --> 00:06:50,686
inconvenience you and
Mom always borrowing yours?
163
00:06:50,710 --> 00:06:53,022
That's very considerate of you.
164
00:06:53,046 --> 00:06:55,747
Is this the one
you have in mind?
165
00:06:55,816 --> 00:06:57,098
No, but I'm going to try
166
00:06:57,167 --> 00:06:59,467
and get something
as close to it as I can.
167
00:07:00,871 --> 00:07:02,281
That's a pretty fancy machine.
168
00:07:02,305 --> 00:07:04,783
A gentle reminder
to you, my boy:
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00:07:04,807 --> 00:07:07,175
Your name is Brady, not Onassis.
170
00:07:07,244 --> 00:07:09,393
I'm going to buy it, Dad.
171
00:07:09,462 --> 00:07:11,963
Look, I've been saving: $109.
172
00:07:16,152 --> 00:07:19,220
Hey, you have been adding to it.
173
00:07:19,289 --> 00:07:20,455
That's good.
174
00:07:20,523 --> 00:07:21,768
Okay.
175
00:07:21,792 --> 00:07:23,903
But I want you to
promise me one thing:
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00:07:23,927 --> 00:07:26,405
Before you buy a car,
you let me look at it.
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00:07:26,429 --> 00:07:27,612
Sure, Dad.
178
00:07:27,680 --> 00:07:29,158
How did you manage
to save all that?
179
00:07:29,182 --> 00:07:30,448
It wasn't easy.
180
00:07:30,517 --> 00:07:33,118
I had to give up a lot
of the necessities of life.
181
00:07:33,186 --> 00:07:34,452
Like what?
182
00:07:34,521 --> 00:07:36,271
Pizzas and French
fries and girls...
183
00:07:36,339 --> 00:07:37,705
Girls?
184
00:07:37,774 --> 00:07:40,658
Well, mostly pizzas
and French fries.
185
00:07:43,046 --> 00:07:44,796
I still don't like the idea
186
00:07:44,865 --> 00:07:47,131
of a 16-year-old
owning his own car.
187
00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:48,344
Well, now look, honey,
188
00:07:48,368 --> 00:07:49,645
you know, we did promise him.
189
00:07:49,669 --> 00:07:51,514
And he's had driver's
education in school,
190
00:07:51,538 --> 00:07:52,748
he's passed his test,
191
00:07:52,772 --> 00:07:54,517
and really, he's a
pretty good driver.
192
00:07:54,541 --> 00:07:57,141
I know, but why can't he
drive your car or my car?
193
00:07:57,210 --> 00:07:59,188
In the long run, what
difference does it make?
194
00:07:59,212 --> 00:08:00,492
Your car, my car, his car.
195
00:08:00,547 --> 00:08:02,442
You got to be logical with him.
196
00:08:02,466 --> 00:08:05,417
I don't have to be
logical... I'm a mother.
197
00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:06,918
Well, anyway,
198
00:08:06,986 --> 00:08:08,564
I think you're
worrying prematurely
199
00:08:08,588 --> 00:08:10,500
because by the time
Greg gets enough money
200
00:08:10,524 --> 00:08:11,834
for the kind of car he wants,
201
00:08:11,858 --> 00:08:14,575
the 1999 models
are going to be here.
202
00:08:14,644 --> 00:08:16,911
Oh, no, he wants to
buy a car right now.
203
00:08:16,980 --> 00:08:18,958
Look, he's only got
a hundred bucks.
204
00:08:18,982 --> 00:08:20,627
He's not going be
satisfied with anything
205
00:08:20,651 --> 00:08:21,931
he can get for that.
206
00:08:21,985 --> 00:08:23,084
Just a hundred dollars?
207
00:08:23,153 --> 00:08:26,120
Yes, and delusions of grandeur.
208
00:08:26,189 --> 00:08:27,634
What kind of a car could he get
209
00:08:27,658 --> 00:08:29,207
for a hundred dollars?
210
00:08:31,477 --> 00:08:33,244
She's a beauty, ain't she, Greg?
211
00:08:33,313 --> 00:08:34,478
I'm only selling her
212
00:08:34,547 --> 00:08:36,347
because I need a
fast hundred bucks.
213
00:08:36,416 --> 00:08:37,626
You know, I got five or six guys
214
00:08:37,650 --> 00:08:38,827
just waiting to buy this baby,
215
00:08:38,851 --> 00:08:40,118
but it's such a good deal,
216
00:08:40,186 --> 00:08:41,619
I wanted a friend
to have it first.
217
00:08:41,687 --> 00:08:43,132
Thanks, Eddie,
I appreciate that.
218
00:08:43,156 --> 00:08:44,867
There's an awful
lot of chrome missing
219
00:08:44,891 --> 00:08:46,669
up and down here,
and all these dents.
220
00:08:46,693 --> 00:08:47,959
What chrome missing?
221
00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:49,308
I got it right here.
222
00:08:49,362 --> 00:08:51,074
You just straighten it out.
223
00:08:51,098 --> 00:08:52,341
As for these dents,
224
00:08:52,365 --> 00:08:54,610
take it to the auto
shop at school,
225
00:08:54,634 --> 00:08:57,194
they'll pound them
right out for you.
226
00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:01,840
So it sticks a little.
227
00:09:01,908 --> 00:09:03,753
When you own a convertible,
228
00:09:03,777 --> 00:09:06,911
you don't use doors...
You just jump right in.
229
00:09:09,049 --> 00:09:10,414
Sports car, right?
230
00:09:10,483 --> 00:09:11,682
Right.
231
00:09:11,752 --> 00:09:13,918
But if you want to
do it the regular way,
232
00:09:13,987 --> 00:09:15,736
it does work.
233
00:09:17,541 --> 00:09:19,106
You see?
234
00:09:19,176 --> 00:09:20,953
Eddie, look at this big hole
235
00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:22,257
in the backseat.
236
00:09:22,312 --> 00:09:23,444
What hole?
237
00:09:23,513 --> 00:09:25,096
A little rip.
238
00:09:25,165 --> 00:09:26,247
Just sew it up.
239
00:09:26,316 --> 00:09:28,236
Only a dime for
needle and thread.
240
00:09:29,152 --> 00:09:30,434
Listen to this horn.
241
00:09:31,838 --> 00:09:33,772
The windshield
wipers work, the radio...
242
00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:35,140
Can I hear the engine?
243
00:09:35,208 --> 00:09:37,475
Sure. Purrs like a kitten.
244
00:09:43,533 --> 00:09:45,717
Runs a little rough
until she warms up,
245
00:09:45,785 --> 00:09:46,985
then she's great.
246
00:09:47,053 --> 00:09:48,152
Yeah, I can feel it.
247
00:09:52,859 --> 00:09:54,809
The idle just needs
to be adjusted.
248
00:09:54,878 --> 00:09:57,795
All this baby needs
is a little bit of work.
249
00:09:57,864 --> 00:09:59,831
Eddie, I don't know.
250
00:10:01,835 --> 00:10:03,529
Greg, Greg, for a hundred bucks
251
00:10:03,553 --> 00:10:04,931
and a little bit of work,
252
00:10:04,955 --> 00:10:07,588
you got yourself a car
that's worth maybe $500.
253
00:10:07,657 --> 00:10:09,791
Think all it'll take
is a little work?
254
00:10:09,860 --> 00:10:11,003
Positive.
255
00:10:11,027 --> 00:10:12,471
Tell you what I'm gonna do...
256
00:10:12,495 --> 00:10:14,673
I'm gonna throw in a repair
manual, absolutely free.
257
00:10:14,697 --> 00:10:17,799
With this, a ten-year-old
could fix her up.
258
00:10:17,868 --> 00:10:19,968
I told my dad I'd let him look
259
00:10:20,036 --> 00:10:22,270
at anything I bought first.
260
00:10:22,338 --> 00:10:24,338
What time is it, Greg?
261
00:10:24,407 --> 00:10:25,706
It's 3:20. Why?
262
00:10:25,776 --> 00:10:27,475
Car's gonna be gone
263
00:10:27,543 --> 00:10:29,521
by the time you
get your dad here.
264
00:10:29,545 --> 00:10:31,373
I got a guy coming
in ten minutes.
265
00:10:31,397 --> 00:10:37,168
And with him...
it's a sure sale.
266
00:10:37,237 --> 00:10:39,170
Eddie, I don't know.
267
00:10:39,239 --> 00:10:41,840
Greg, it's a great deal.
268
00:10:41,908 --> 00:10:43,886
Or would you rather
wait five or six years
269
00:10:43,910 --> 00:10:46,577
for a set of wheels?
270
00:10:50,283 --> 00:10:53,546
Cocoa, uh, sugar... Yup.
271
00:10:53,570 --> 00:10:54,614
Peanut butter. Right.
272
00:10:58,241 --> 00:11:00,341
What on earth was that?
273
00:11:01,844 --> 00:11:03,322
Sounds like the mating call
274
00:11:03,346 --> 00:11:05,613
of a lovesick moose.
275
00:11:08,334 --> 00:11:09,467
What's that?
276
00:11:09,536 --> 00:11:10,635
That sounds horrible!
277
00:11:10,704 --> 00:11:12,153
I know. Come on.
278
00:11:16,576 --> 00:11:18,025
Oh...
279
00:11:28,704 --> 00:11:30,371
Hi.
280
00:11:30,439 --> 00:11:32,673
Greg, could you
turn that thing off?
281
00:11:32,742 --> 00:11:33,891
Dad, I'm trying.
282
00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:36,394
As soon as I get
the hood open...
283
00:11:46,356 --> 00:11:47,805
How do you like her?
284
00:11:51,177 --> 00:11:52,393
Oh, Mike.
285
00:11:52,462 --> 00:11:54,540
She's mine; all mine.
286
00:12:03,623 --> 00:12:04,955
Head for the hills, men!
287
00:12:05,024 --> 00:12:07,658
The dam has busted!
288
00:12:18,521 --> 00:12:19,954
Greg, are you trying to tell us
289
00:12:20,023 --> 00:12:22,673
that you actually
bought this, uh...
290
00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:24,309
Classic, Dad.
291
00:12:24,377 --> 00:12:25,521
Mike, do you think it's safe
292
00:12:25,545 --> 00:12:27,045
for him to drive it?
293
00:12:27,113 --> 00:12:29,025
Honey, I think it's the safest
kind of car you could have...
294
00:12:29,049 --> 00:12:30,315
One that's not going to run.
295
00:12:30,383 --> 00:12:32,194
A little work, I'll have
this thing running great.
296
00:12:32,218 --> 00:12:33,429
Listen, I thought
you promised me
297
00:12:33,453 --> 00:12:35,031
that you were going
to let me look at the car
298
00:12:35,055 --> 00:12:36,532
before you bought it. Yeah.
299
00:12:36,556 --> 00:12:38,534
I know, but I had to move fast.
300
00:12:38,558 --> 00:12:40,369
A lot of other guys
wanted to buy this thing,
301
00:12:40,393 --> 00:12:42,204
but my friend, Eddie,
offered it to me first.
302
00:12:42,228 --> 00:12:43,605
It was such a great bargain,
303
00:12:43,629 --> 00:12:44,873
I knew you'd understand.
304
00:12:44,897 --> 00:12:47,332
Some friend, that Eddie.
305
00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:48,499
Yeah.
306
00:12:48,568 --> 00:12:51,169
Greg, uh, what
did you pay for it?
307
00:12:51,237 --> 00:12:52,517
A hundred bucks.
308
00:12:52,572 --> 00:12:53,882
Eddie said it was a steal.
309
00:12:53,906 --> 00:12:55,340
Yeah, I think it was a steal.
310
00:12:55,408 --> 00:12:56,885
He even threw in
this repair manual.
311
00:12:56,909 --> 00:12:58,120
Now with this thing,
312
00:12:58,144 --> 00:12:59,388
even a ten-year-old
could fix her up.
313
00:12:59,412 --> 00:13:01,657
See, it tells you how
to boil out a carburetor,
314
00:13:01,681 --> 00:13:03,448
work on the timing gear,
315
00:13:03,516 --> 00:13:06,117
and a lot of stuff
about the transmission.
316
00:13:06,186 --> 00:13:07,863
Well, I think I'll leave
you two mechanics
317
00:13:07,887 --> 00:13:09,387
to work out the greasy details.
318
00:13:09,456 --> 00:13:12,690
I'll be back in about an hour
to see Old Faithful blow again.
319
00:13:14,194 --> 00:13:16,944
Well, do you think
you could get it started
320
00:13:17,013 --> 00:13:19,113
so I could hear the engine?
321
00:13:19,181 --> 00:13:22,182
Uh, sure, Dad. Yeah.
322
00:13:36,900 --> 00:13:39,333
How does it sound?
323
00:13:39,402 --> 00:13:42,737
Like a flock of
geese heading south.
324
00:13:42,806 --> 00:13:44,338
Sick geese.
325
00:13:46,976 --> 00:13:49,577
Yeah, well, Eddie
says that's the idle.
326
00:13:49,646 --> 00:13:53,380
Nothing a couple of turns
of a screwdriver can't fix.
327
00:13:53,450 --> 00:13:54,648
You know what, Dad?
328
00:13:54,717 --> 00:13:55,816
I was thinking.
329
00:13:55,885 --> 00:13:57,496
Put a new coat of paint on here.
330
00:13:57,520 --> 00:13:59,960
Maybe a rally stripe
down the front of the hood.
331
00:14:00,022 --> 00:14:02,134
Mag wheels, a whip
antenna for the radio.
332
00:14:02,158 --> 00:14:03,591
Don't you think
that's gonna strain
333
00:14:03,660 --> 00:14:04,958
your budget a little bit?
334
00:14:05,027 --> 00:14:07,762
Well, not if I do
all the work myself.
335
00:14:07,830 --> 00:14:09,141
It shouldn't cost much at all.
336
00:14:09,165 --> 00:14:11,599
Not much more than
a new Rolls-Royce.
337
00:14:11,668 --> 00:14:14,602
Yeah, well, maybe I
can do a little bit at a time.
338
00:14:14,671 --> 00:14:16,270
Well, all right, all right.
339
00:14:16,339 --> 00:14:19,774
We'll work it out.
340
00:14:19,842 --> 00:14:22,276
You know, it-it
kind of reminds me
341
00:14:22,345 --> 00:14:25,446
of an old car my
dad used to have.
342
00:14:25,515 --> 00:14:28,516
Matter of fact, I think
it is my dad's old car.
343
00:14:35,308 --> 00:14:37,148
Jan, you don't stir paint
with a socket wrench.
344
00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:38,309
You'll ruin it.
345
00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:39,477
Give it to me.
346
00:14:39,546 --> 00:14:41,145
Okay, here.
347
00:14:41,214 --> 00:14:43,981
Thanks a lot.
348
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:49,320
Is all the rust coming off?
349
00:14:49,389 --> 00:14:50,533
I hope not.
350
00:14:50,557 --> 00:14:51,989
What do you mean?
351
00:14:52,058 --> 00:14:54,236
It's the only thing
holding the car together.
352
00:14:54,260 --> 00:14:55,326
Take it easy.
353
00:14:55,395 --> 00:14:57,128
At least the upholstery
is clean, Greg.
354
00:14:57,197 --> 00:14:58,541
Great. Thanks, Marcia.
355
00:14:58,565 --> 00:15:00,376
Hey, what's that stuff
you're cleaning it with?
356
00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:01,432
Water.
357
00:15:01,501 --> 00:15:02,766
Black water?
358
00:15:02,835 --> 00:15:04,602
It wasn't black when I started.
359
00:15:08,007 --> 00:15:09,440
What do you think you're doing?
360
00:15:09,509 --> 00:15:10,941
Cleaning the engine.
361
00:15:11,010 --> 00:15:13,111
There's a lot of grease
and gunk in here.
362
00:15:13,179 --> 00:15:14,945
You don't clean an
engine with a vacuum.
363
00:15:15,014 --> 00:15:16,614
Get that out of here.
364
00:15:16,682 --> 00:15:19,016
Kids.
365
00:15:22,806 --> 00:15:25,556
Hey, Alice, what
are you cooking?
366
00:15:25,625 --> 00:15:27,225
Something new?
367
00:15:27,293 --> 00:15:29,927
Would you care to
guess, Mrs. Brady?
368
00:15:29,996 --> 00:15:32,896
Well, it certainly
smells odd. Cabbage?
369
00:15:32,965 --> 00:15:34,148
Nope.
370
00:15:34,217 --> 00:15:37,568
Well, now I know it's
not Brussels sprouts.
371
00:15:37,637 --> 00:15:39,081
Nope. Give up? Yes.
372
00:15:39,105 --> 00:15:41,505
Specialty of the house:
373
00:15:41,574 --> 00:15:44,075
Boiled-out carburetor a la Greg.
374
00:15:48,564 --> 00:15:51,081
Listen, I knew you
thought I'd never get done...
375
00:15:51,151 --> 00:15:52,194
That's true.
376
00:15:52,218 --> 00:15:53,384
But here it is.
377
00:15:53,453 --> 00:15:55,164
Well, I have to admit, I
was a doubting Thomas.
378
00:15:55,188 --> 00:15:57,288
Yeah, and I was Mrs.
Doubting Thomas.
379
00:15:57,357 --> 00:15:59,217
I guess I'm just a
natural-born mechanic.
380
00:15:59,241 --> 00:16:01,241
I got the engine
running like a watch.
381
00:16:02,712 --> 00:16:04,352
What's that?
382
00:16:04,413 --> 00:16:06,441
Spare parts for the watch?
383
00:16:06,465 --> 00:16:08,399
No, I redesigned the engine.
384
00:16:08,468 --> 00:16:10,834
That's just extra
junk we didn't need.
385
00:16:10,903 --> 00:16:12,798
All right, everybody,
you're about to see
386
00:16:12,822 --> 00:16:15,522
the hottest set of wheels
this side of Indianapolis.
387
00:16:15,591 --> 00:16:18,111
Okay.
388
00:16:21,681 --> 00:16:23,347
I think we put the cloth on
389
00:16:23,416 --> 00:16:25,166
before the paint was dry.
390
00:16:27,053 --> 00:16:31,105
I think it's just caught
in the door here.
391
00:16:32,542 --> 00:16:34,142
Here it is, folks.
392
00:16:34,210 --> 00:16:35,210
Ta-da!
393
00:16:38,881 --> 00:16:42,984
You've certainly
done a fine job, son.
394
00:16:43,052 --> 00:16:45,903
Say, that looks marvelous.
395
00:16:45,971 --> 00:16:48,139
Wait till you hear the engine.
396
00:16:55,481 --> 00:16:57,192
Oh, and I fixed that
short in the horn, too.
397
00:16:57,216 --> 00:16:59,466
In fact, I rewired all
the electrical circuits.
398
00:16:59,535 --> 00:17:01,619
Listen to this horn.
399
00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:09,546
He did say horn...
didn't he say horn?
400
00:17:17,270 --> 00:17:18,685
What's causing that?
401
00:17:24,861 --> 00:17:26,927
It's going mad.
402
00:17:31,633 --> 00:17:33,161
Hey, you better bail out.
403
00:17:37,089 --> 00:17:39,940
Boy, did I ever get
stuck with a lemon.
404
00:17:40,009 --> 00:17:41,508
"A little elbow grease."
405
00:17:41,577 --> 00:17:43,722
Well, I don't think
a little elbow grease
406
00:17:43,746 --> 00:17:45,324
is going to cure rigor mortis.
407
00:17:45,348 --> 00:17:46,280
Careful, Dad.
408
00:17:46,349 --> 00:17:47,781
You're liable to crush the door.
409
00:17:47,850 --> 00:17:49,616
Some friend, that Eddie.
410
00:17:49,685 --> 00:17:51,496
Aw, come on, Greg,
forget about Eddie.
411
00:17:51,520 --> 00:17:52,664
You made a business deal,
412
00:17:52,688 --> 00:17:53,999
he got the best
of you, that's all.
413
00:17:54,023 --> 00:17:55,122
A business deal.
414
00:17:55,191 --> 00:17:56,290
That's the last time
415
00:17:56,359 --> 00:17:57,836
I'm going to do
business with a friend.
416
00:17:57,860 --> 00:17:59,171
I think maybe you
learned something
417
00:17:59,195 --> 00:18:00,339
about the business world.
418
00:18:00,363 --> 00:18:01,728
What do you mean?
419
00:18:01,797 --> 00:18:03,942
Well, look, you take sellers...
420
00:18:03,966 --> 00:18:05,794
They've got
something to sell, right?
421
00:18:05,818 --> 00:18:06,901
Right.
422
00:18:06,969 --> 00:18:08,279
Naturally, they're
going to make it sound
423
00:18:08,303 --> 00:18:09,403
as attractive as possible
424
00:18:09,471 --> 00:18:10,949
even if they have to
exaggerate to do it.
425
00:18:10,973 --> 00:18:12,253
You mean lie.
426
00:18:12,307 --> 00:18:14,074
Yes, quite often they do.
427
00:18:14,143 --> 00:18:16,410
Although they might
call it gilding the lily.
428
00:18:16,478 --> 00:18:18,579
But the important thing
is that you're the buyer...
429
00:18:18,648 --> 00:18:20,414
You have to keep
your guard up, see?
430
00:18:20,482 --> 00:18:23,083
It's the old principle
of caveat emptor.
431
00:18:23,152 --> 00:18:24,752
Caveat emptor?
432
00:18:24,820 --> 00:18:27,588
It's Latin for "Let
the buyer beware."
433
00:18:27,657 --> 00:18:29,256
Or, to put it in the vernacular,
434
00:18:29,324 --> 00:18:31,759
"Them who don't look,
sometimes gets took."
435
00:18:31,827 --> 00:18:33,304
Well, that Eddie really took me.
436
00:18:33,328 --> 00:18:34,562
Yeah, he did.
437
00:18:34,630 --> 00:18:36,307
He had you hog-tied and
happy before you knew it.
438
00:18:36,331 --> 00:18:37,431
But you let it happen.
439
00:18:37,499 --> 00:18:38,999
Okay, the important thing is
440
00:18:39,068 --> 00:18:40,601
that you learned something.
441
00:18:40,670 --> 00:18:44,605
Yeah, don't worry,
Dad, have I ever.
442
00:18:44,674 --> 00:18:47,725
Good boy.
443
00:18:49,895 --> 00:18:52,163
What were you
talking to Dad about?
444
00:18:52,231 --> 00:18:54,243
Oh, a few of the facts of life.
445
00:18:54,267 --> 00:18:56,133
Like caveat emptor.
446
00:18:56,202 --> 00:18:57,468
What's that?
447
00:18:57,537 --> 00:19:00,971
It means "Let the
buyer beware" in Latin.
448
00:19:01,040 --> 00:19:03,051
Yeah, don't you know anything?
449
00:19:03,075 --> 00:19:04,341
Oh, I know Latin.
450
00:19:04,410 --> 00:19:05,842
Obby-bay Ady-bray.
451
00:19:05,911 --> 00:19:07,944
That's "Bobby Brady" in Latin.
452
00:19:08,013 --> 00:19:10,514
That's pig Latin, loser.
453
00:19:10,583 --> 00:19:12,399
Boy, I sure learned my lesson.
454
00:19:12,468 --> 00:19:13,778
When I get rid
of that old clunk,
455
00:19:13,802 --> 00:19:15,236
this time, I'm the seller,
456
00:19:15,304 --> 00:19:18,139
and it's the other guy who
has to do the caveat emptoring.
457
00:19:18,207 --> 00:19:20,018
How you gonna get rid of it?
458
00:19:20,042 --> 00:19:22,070
Just find somebody
who is dumber than I am.
459
00:19:22,094 --> 00:19:24,745
It isn't going to be easy.
460
00:19:29,051 --> 00:19:31,585
Uh, I knew you were
looking for a car, Ronnie.
461
00:19:31,653 --> 00:19:32,831
That's why I called.
462
00:19:32,855 --> 00:19:34,833
I want a friend
to have this baby.
463
00:19:34,857 --> 00:19:36,323
I don't know, Greg.
464
00:19:36,392 --> 00:19:38,425
It looks kind of an old model.
465
00:19:38,494 --> 00:19:40,738
Oh, Ronnie, the
word isn't "old."
466
00:19:40,762 --> 00:19:42,196
The word is "classic."
467
00:19:42,264 --> 00:19:43,697
In a couple of years,
468
00:19:43,765 --> 00:19:45,143
this'll be a collector's item
469
00:19:45,167 --> 00:19:46,644
worth five times
what I'm asking for it.
470
00:19:46,668 --> 00:19:47,767
Yeah, you think so?
471
00:19:47,836 --> 00:19:49,203
Oh, sure.
472
00:19:49,271 --> 00:19:51,283
Listen, I got five or six
guys after this beauty.
473
00:19:51,307 --> 00:19:54,008
But like I said, I want
a friend to have it.
474
00:19:54,076 --> 00:19:55,609
Yeah, and I appreciate it, too.
475
00:19:55,677 --> 00:19:57,211
Hi. What are you doing?
476
00:19:57,279 --> 00:19:59,980
Uh, just showing Ronnie
this little gem here.
477
00:20:00,049 --> 00:20:02,833
Tell him how sensational
the car is, girls.
478
00:20:02,902 --> 00:20:05,436
Sure. Sensational.
479
00:20:05,505 --> 00:20:08,172
Oh, especially when
it's standing still.
480
00:20:10,042 --> 00:20:11,308
Those sisters of mine.
481
00:20:11,377 --> 00:20:14,011
Great little sense of humor.
482
00:20:15,915 --> 00:20:17,481
What's the matter with the door?
483
00:20:17,550 --> 00:20:18,694
So it sticks a little.
484
00:20:18,718 --> 00:20:20,195
Listen, when you
got a convertible,
485
00:20:20,219 --> 00:20:21,363
who uses doors?
486
00:20:21,387 --> 00:20:22,667
You just kind of jump in
487
00:20:22,722 --> 00:20:24,555
like it was a sports car, right?
488
00:20:24,624 --> 00:20:26,357
Watch this.
489
00:20:26,426 --> 00:20:28,325
There. Now, listen,
I want to tell you
490
00:20:28,394 --> 00:20:29,727
about these
wipers I got in here.
491
00:20:29,796 --> 00:20:31,161
I got them hooked
up to the horn.
492
00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:32,496
It's fantastic.
493
00:20:32,565 --> 00:20:34,860
All you do is... Greg,
can I have these?
494
00:20:34,884 --> 00:20:36,483
Cindy, can't you see I'm busy?
495
00:20:36,552 --> 00:20:38,936
But you said these
parts were left over
496
00:20:39,005 --> 00:20:41,088
after you tried
to fix the motor.
497
00:20:42,625 --> 00:20:44,191
Great little sense of humor.
498
00:20:44,260 --> 00:20:45,426
Nine years old.
499
00:20:45,494 --> 00:20:47,628
Cindy, I got a candy
bar on my dresser.
500
00:20:47,697 --> 00:20:48,697
You can have it.
501
00:20:48,731 --> 00:20:49,774
Thanks.
502
00:20:49,798 --> 00:20:50,897
Sure.
503
00:20:50,966 --> 00:20:52,043
Hey, Ronnie, why
don't you try it?
504
00:20:52,067 --> 00:20:54,268
Come on.
505
00:20:55,304 --> 00:20:56,937
By the way, how's the engine?
506
00:20:57,006 --> 00:20:58,350
Ah, it's great. Just great.
507
00:20:58,374 --> 00:21:00,218
And, listen, I wanted
to show you this radio.
508
00:21:00,242 --> 00:21:01,508
Well, can I hear it?
509
00:21:01,577 --> 00:21:04,695
Uh, sure, but it's
a waste of time.
510
00:21:04,764 --> 00:21:06,096
Purrs like a kitten.
511
00:21:11,737 --> 00:21:13,220
Sounded kind of funny.
512
00:21:13,289 --> 00:21:14,788
That's just the idle.
513
00:21:14,857 --> 00:21:16,001
Nothing a couple of turns
514
00:21:16,025 --> 00:21:17,569
of the screwdriver
can't fix, huh?
515
00:21:17,593 --> 00:21:19,171
Listen, make up
your mind, Ronnie.
516
00:21:19,195 --> 00:21:20,475
Is it a deal?
517
00:21:20,529 --> 00:21:21,962
I don't know, Greg.
518
00:21:22,031 --> 00:21:23,797
What time is it?
519
00:21:23,866 --> 00:21:25,132
I don't know.
520
00:21:25,201 --> 00:21:26,711
It's 4:15, and I
got to show this
521
00:21:26,735 --> 00:21:28,180
to another guy in five minutes.
522
00:21:28,204 --> 00:21:29,381
Now, what'll it be, Ron?
523
00:21:29,405 --> 00:21:31,016
Do you want to
miss the opportunity
524
00:21:31,040 --> 00:21:33,740
of a lifetime, or do
you want the car?
525
00:21:49,091 --> 00:21:50,102
Hello, girls.
526
00:21:50,126 --> 00:21:52,037
Oh, hi.
527
00:21:52,061 --> 00:21:54,372
Well, it looks like Greg
must've got his car running.
528
00:21:54,396 --> 00:21:56,496
He must have used
artificial respiration.
529
00:21:56,565 --> 00:21:58,210
Hey, girls, do you
know where Greg went?
530
00:21:58,234 --> 00:22:00,045
Well, he was showing
the car to some boy,
531
00:22:00,069 --> 00:22:01,480
and then they
drove off somewhere.
532
00:22:01,504 --> 00:22:02,914
He was trying to get us to say
533
00:22:02,938 --> 00:22:04,616
how great that old wreck was.
534
00:22:04,640 --> 00:22:06,607
He kept winking at
us, you know, like that.
535
00:22:06,675 --> 00:22:09,309
And he even gave
Cindy a candy bar.
536
00:22:09,378 --> 00:22:11,662
Well, I wonder
what that's all about.
537
00:22:11,731 --> 00:22:13,146
Hmm, so do I.
538
00:22:13,215 --> 00:22:14,215
Boys?
539
00:22:14,283 --> 00:22:16,550
Did Greg sell his car?
540
00:22:16,619 --> 00:22:18,580
Yeah, he called
the guy a pigeon.
541
00:22:18,604 --> 00:22:21,488
He said he was going to
really cavit the guy's eruptor.
542
00:22:23,542 --> 00:22:25,809
"Cavit his eruptor"? What...?
543
00:22:25,878 --> 00:22:28,479
I think he means
caveat his emptor.
544
00:22:28,547 --> 00:22:29,646
Caveat emptor?
545
00:22:29,715 --> 00:22:30,859
Now where did they pick that up?
546
00:22:30,883 --> 00:22:31,960
I had a long talk with Greg
547
00:22:31,984 --> 00:22:33,264
about buying and selling,
548
00:22:33,318 --> 00:22:35,753
but I'm afraid he
learned the wrong lesson.
549
00:22:35,821 --> 00:22:37,638
Yeah, I really gave
him a hard sell.
550
00:22:37,706 --> 00:22:40,257
Boy, the chump went
for it hook, line and sinker.
551
00:22:40,326 --> 00:22:42,104
You didn't lie to
him, did you, Greg?
552
00:22:42,128 --> 00:22:43,493
I gilded the lily pretty good.
553
00:22:43,562 --> 00:22:44,873
Greg, is that all you got
554
00:22:44,897 --> 00:22:46,208
out of that talk we had?
555
00:22:46,232 --> 00:22:48,032
Sure. That's what
gave me the idea.
556
00:22:48,100 --> 00:22:49,366
I figure, if I got stuck,
557
00:22:49,435 --> 00:22:50,884
why shouldn't somebody else?
558
00:22:50,952 --> 00:22:53,286
So you found yourself a pigeon.
559
00:22:53,355 --> 00:22:54,671
It was a cinch.
560
00:22:54,740 --> 00:22:55,900
And I had the hundred bucks
561
00:22:55,942 --> 00:22:57,402
in my hot little
hand, and then...
562
00:22:57,426 --> 00:22:59,059
Then you what?
563
00:23:02,498 --> 00:23:04,565
And then, I let the
sucker off the hook.
564
00:23:04,634 --> 00:23:06,194
I just couldn't
go through with it.
565
00:23:06,218 --> 00:23:08,768
You mean you didn't
sell him the car?
566
00:23:08,837 --> 00:23:11,122
Guess I'm a pretty
crummy businessman.
567
00:23:11,190 --> 00:23:13,290
No, no, you're an honest one.
568
00:23:13,359 --> 00:23:14,502
Right.
569
00:23:14,526 --> 00:23:15,893
But where's the car?
570
00:23:15,962 --> 00:23:17,777
Oh, well, I was getting to that.
571
00:23:17,846 --> 00:23:19,113
Driving home, it broke down
572
00:23:19,181 --> 00:23:21,848
between Second
Street and Fifth Street.
573
00:23:21,917 --> 00:23:23,967
That's a pretty big
area. Whereabouts?
574
00:23:24,036 --> 00:23:25,036
All the way.
575
00:23:25,071 --> 00:23:26,470
It just kept falling apart.
576
00:23:28,007 --> 00:23:30,235
Fifth Street? Isn't that
over near the junkyard?
577
00:23:30,259 --> 00:23:31,524
That's where I sold it.
578
00:23:31,593 --> 00:23:33,288
The junkman gave
me 50 bucks for it.
579
00:23:33,312 --> 00:23:34,506
Listen, look, you lost $50,
580
00:23:34,530 --> 00:23:35,462
but if you've learned something,
581
00:23:35,531 --> 00:23:36,591
it's worth it.
582
00:23:36,615 --> 00:23:37,942
Especially the way it ended.
583
00:23:37,966 --> 00:23:39,678
Can you imagine
a car falling apart
584
00:23:39,702 --> 00:23:41,968
in front of a junkyard?
585
00:23:42,037 --> 00:23:45,489
Yeah, well, I guess cars
are like elephants, Mom.
586
00:23:45,558 --> 00:23:48,541
They both know where
to go when they die.
587
00:24:03,542 --> 00:24:05,971
Now, come on, girls,
we're going to be late.
588
00:24:05,995 --> 00:24:07,238
In the station wagon.
589
00:24:07,262 --> 00:24:08,729
We're hurrying, Mom.
590
00:24:08,798 --> 00:24:10,642
I forgot the ballet class
was early this morning.
591
00:24:10,666 --> 00:24:13,767
We'll be back in a couple
of hours, Alice. Right.
592
00:24:13,836 --> 00:24:15,268
I forgot one.
593
00:24:15,337 --> 00:24:17,771
Come on, Cindy. Attagirl.
594
00:24:17,840 --> 00:24:19,484
Ah, your breakfast
is on the table.
595
00:24:19,508 --> 00:24:20,608
I hope you wanted eggs.
596
00:24:20,676 --> 00:24:21,775
Anything's great, Alice.
597
00:24:21,844 --> 00:24:23,677
I'm late for my golf game.
598
00:24:24,847 --> 00:24:26,825
Dad, can I use the car, please?
599
00:24:26,849 --> 00:24:28,760
No, I'm sorry, son, I'm
playing golf this morning.
600
00:24:28,784 --> 00:24:29,928
Oh, shoot, I'm pitching today,
601
00:24:29,952 --> 00:24:31,162
and if they start somebody else,
602
00:24:31,186 --> 00:24:32,330
I'll lose my spot.
603
00:24:32,354 --> 00:24:33,386
Oh, all right, all right.
604
00:24:33,455 --> 00:24:34,666
I'll get your mother
to drive me. Here.
605
00:24:34,690 --> 00:24:35,623
Okay, great. Thanks, Dad.
606
00:24:35,691 --> 00:24:37,124
Listen, be careful, will you?
607
00:24:37,192 --> 00:24:38,626
Eggs okay?
608
00:24:38,694 --> 00:24:40,060
Yeah, they're fine.
609
00:24:40,129 --> 00:24:42,462
Alice, listen, you think
Mrs. Brady's ready to go yet?
610
00:24:42,531 --> 00:24:44,676
I want her to drop me
off at the golf course.
611
00:24:44,700 --> 00:24:47,467
She's more than ready to
go, Mr. Brady... she's gone.
612
00:24:47,536 --> 00:24:50,137
Gone?
613
00:24:50,205 --> 00:24:52,640
Oh, no, there goes my golf game.
614
00:24:52,708 --> 00:24:53,807
Wait a minute.
615
00:24:53,876 --> 00:24:55,220
I have a feeling
that from now on
616
00:24:55,244 --> 00:24:56,521
you're going to be needing this
617
00:24:56,545 --> 00:24:57,645
more than I am.
618
00:24:57,713 --> 00:24:58,646
What's that?
619
00:24:58,714 --> 00:24:59,947
My bus pass.
620
00:25:00,016 --> 00:25:01,665
Bus pass?
621
00:25:01,734 --> 00:25:03,384
Oh, it's a cinch, Mr. Brady.
622
00:25:03,452 --> 00:25:05,852
You take the number
two bus to Oak Street,
623
00:25:05,921 --> 00:25:07,849
then you transfer
to the 56 Crosstown.
624
00:25:07,873 --> 00:25:09,956
Then you take the 18
to the end of the line.
625
00:25:10,042 --> 00:25:12,359
From there on, it's
express all the way.
40231
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