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♪ Here's the story
of a lovely lady ♪
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♪ Who was bringing up
three very lovely girls ♪
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♪ All of them had hair of gold ♪
4
00:00:20,988 --> 00:00:22,821
♪ Like their mother ♪
5
00:00:22,857 --> 00:00:25,891
♪ The youngest one in curls ♪
6
00:00:25,926 --> 00:00:30,095
♪ It's the story of a
man named Brady ♪
7
00:00:30,130 --> 00:00:33,899
♪ Who was busy with
three boys of his own ♪
8
00:00:33,934 --> 00:00:37,536
♪ They were four
men living all together ♪
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♪ Yet they were all alone ♪
10
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♪ Till the one day when ♪
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♪ The lady met this fellow ♪
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♪ And they knew that it was ♪
13
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♪ Much more than a hunch ♪
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♪ That this group ♪
15
00:00:50,017 --> 00:00:52,217
♪ Must somehow form a family ♪
16
00:00:52,252 --> 00:00:53,919
♪ That's the way they all ♪
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♪ Became the Brady bunch ♪
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♪ The Brady Bunch ♪
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♪ The Brady Bunch ♪
20
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♪ That's the way they became ♪
21
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♪ The Brady Bunch. ♪
22
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Hi.
23
00:01:30,891 --> 00:01:32,691
Peter.
24
00:01:32,726 --> 00:01:35,427
What are you doing
home from school?
25
00:01:35,462 --> 00:01:37,095
They sent me home.
26
00:01:37,130 --> 00:01:38,697
Measles.
27
00:01:38,732 --> 00:01:39,798
It's either measles
28
00:01:39,833 --> 00:01:41,366
or a strange case
of red freckles.
29
00:01:41,401 --> 00:01:42,946
You have got a temperature.
30
00:01:42,970 --> 00:01:44,803
They told me 101.1.
31
00:01:44,838 --> 00:01:46,638
What's the record?
32
00:01:46,674 --> 00:01:49,174
Never mind. That's one
record you don't want to break.
33
00:01:49,209 --> 00:01:51,810
Right. You don't get to
hold the title very long.
34
00:01:51,845 --> 00:01:54,046
I think you better go
upstairs and get into bed.
35
00:01:54,081 --> 00:01:56,181
I'll phone the doctor,
and be right up.
36
00:01:56,216 --> 00:01:58,116
Measles. Let's
hope all the others
37
00:01:58,151 --> 00:01:59,952
don't start coming down with it.
38
00:01:59,987 --> 00:02:01,865
Oh, that would be terrible.
39
00:02:01,889 --> 00:02:04,122
Right. As the warden at
the state prison once said,
40
00:02:04,157 --> 00:02:06,524
"I sure would hate to see
'em all break out at once."
41
00:02:06,560 --> 00:02:07,726
Alice...
42
00:02:19,840 --> 00:02:21,551
Oh, no. Are you
sure it's the measles?
43
00:02:21,575 --> 00:02:23,587
Well, he's certainly
got all the symptoms...
44
00:02:23,611 --> 00:02:25,254
A slight temperature,
a lot of dots
45
00:02:25,278 --> 00:02:26,355
and a great big smile.
46
00:02:26,379 --> 00:02:27,813
A great big smile?
47
00:02:27,848 --> 00:02:29,280
No school for a few days.
48
00:02:29,316 --> 00:02:31,282
Oh. Did you call the doctor?
49
00:02:31,318 --> 00:02:33,652
I've been trying to, honey,
but the line's been busy.
50
00:02:33,687 --> 00:02:35,498
Well, say hello to
my dotted son for me.
51
00:02:35,522 --> 00:02:37,366
Tell him I'll bring him
some comic books,
52
00:02:37,390 --> 00:02:38,757
and I'll see you later, dear.
53
00:02:38,792 --> 00:02:41,093
Okay, honey. Bye.
54
00:02:41,128 --> 00:02:43,495
Oh, Alice, have you
seen the thermometer?
55
00:02:43,530 --> 00:02:44,496
Well, let's see.
56
00:02:44,531 --> 00:02:46,651
The last time I used it
was in the roast beef.
57
00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:48,867
Oh, you mean for people.
58
00:02:48,902 --> 00:02:50,168
I'll get it.
59
00:03:00,047 --> 00:03:03,381
Hello. May I please
speak to Dr. Porter?
60
00:03:03,416 --> 00:03:05,550
Dr. Porter, this is Carol Brady.
61
00:03:05,585 --> 00:03:07,986
Would you mind
stopping by the house?
62
00:03:08,022 --> 00:03:11,990
One of the kids was sent home
from school with the measles.
63
00:03:12,026 --> 00:03:13,925
Yeah. Thanks a lot.
64
00:03:13,961 --> 00:03:16,795
Jan!
65
00:03:16,830 --> 00:03:18,108
You've got measles.
66
00:03:18,132 --> 00:03:20,766
Golly. Mothers are
supposed to know everything,
67
00:03:20,801 --> 00:03:22,768
but do you have
to keep proving it?
68
00:03:22,803 --> 00:03:24,547
You've got a temperature, too.
69
00:03:24,571 --> 00:03:25,871
What do you mean, too?
70
00:03:25,906 --> 00:03:27,651
Peter was sent home from school
71
00:03:27,675 --> 00:03:28,785
a little while ago.
72
00:03:28,809 --> 00:03:30,453
Oh. What was his temperature?
73
00:03:30,477 --> 00:03:32,343
101.1.
74
00:03:32,379 --> 00:03:33,712
Oh, is that all?
75
00:03:33,747 --> 00:03:34,880
I'm 101.2.
76
00:03:34,915 --> 00:03:36,081
You get right into bed.
77
00:03:36,116 --> 00:03:37,683
Dr. Porter's on the way over.
78
00:03:37,718 --> 00:03:39,996
Can I tell Peter he's
a point behind me?
79
00:03:40,020 --> 00:03:42,287
I'm sure he'd appreciate
your sympathy.
80
00:03:42,322 --> 00:03:44,056
Now into bed, Jan.
81
00:03:49,163 --> 00:03:50,940
I can't understand a
word you're saying.
82
00:03:50,964 --> 00:03:52,575
Wait till I get the
thermometer out.
83
00:03:53,967 --> 00:03:57,035
Five, four, three, two and out.
84
00:03:57,071 --> 00:03:59,771
What's a seven-letter
word for "drink"?
85
00:03:59,807 --> 00:04:01,439
Good. Hasn't gone up a bit.
86
00:04:01,474 --> 00:04:03,514
I need a seven-letter
word for "drink."
87
00:04:03,543 --> 00:04:05,610
Oh, seven-letter
word for "drink."
88
00:04:05,645 --> 00:04:06,756
Mom? Mom?
89
00:04:06,780 --> 00:04:09,147
I'll be right back.
90
00:04:09,183 --> 00:04:11,583
Your mother's in
the kitchen, sweetie,
91
00:04:11,618 --> 00:04:14,285
fixing that special
milkshake you wanted.
92
00:04:14,321 --> 00:04:15,598
Oh, yeah.
93
00:04:15,622 --> 00:04:16,988
See what I drew, Alice?
94
00:04:17,024 --> 00:04:20,192
Oh, that's beautiful, Jan!
95
00:04:20,227 --> 00:04:21,359
Just beautiful!
96
00:04:21,394 --> 00:04:23,294
Can you tell what it is?
97
00:04:23,330 --> 00:04:24,996
Of course. It's a bird.
98
00:04:25,032 --> 00:04:26,297
I don't mean that.
99
00:04:26,333 --> 00:04:28,299
I mean what kind of a bird?
100
00:04:29,837 --> 00:04:32,904
Oh... Peter: Alice!
101
00:04:32,940 --> 00:04:37,776
Um... I, uh... I promised
Peter I'd help him.
102
00:04:37,811 --> 00:04:40,345
Uh... let's see. A
seven-letter word for drink.
103
00:04:40,380 --> 00:04:41,346
I think I got it.
104
00:04:41,381 --> 00:04:43,392
Limeade. That's seven letters.
105
00:04:43,416 --> 00:04:44,682
It starts with an "S."
106
00:04:44,718 --> 00:04:46,785
Now you tell me.
107
00:04:46,820 --> 00:04:48,098
Alice!
108
00:04:48,122 --> 00:04:52,090
Uh... hey, uh... how...
how about soda pop?
109
00:04:52,126 --> 00:04:53,258
That's two words.
110
00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:55,894
Alice! I'll be right back.
111
00:04:55,929 --> 00:04:57,462
Eagle.
112
00:04:57,497 --> 00:04:59,231
Hawk.
113
00:04:59,266 --> 00:05:01,499
Vulture.
114
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:04,770
It's a swallow.
115
00:05:04,805 --> 00:05:08,539
Of course. It's a swallow.
116
00:05:08,575 --> 00:05:10,475
Alice!
117
00:05:10,510 --> 00:05:14,545
Swallow. I think I've got it.
118
00:05:16,683 --> 00:05:18,917
Peter, you got
your pencil ready?
119
00:05:18,952 --> 00:05:20,196
Swallow.
120
00:05:20,220 --> 00:05:21,220
I've got that one.
121
00:05:22,622 --> 00:05:25,456
What's a five-letter
word for exhausted?
122
00:05:25,492 --> 00:05:28,559
Alice.
123
00:05:28,595 --> 00:05:30,662
Well, Dr. Cameron,
this is Mike Brady.
124
00:05:30,697 --> 00:05:32,730
I've been wondering about Peter.
125
00:05:32,766 --> 00:05:34,800
What do you mean,
wondering what?
126
00:05:34,835 --> 00:05:36,201
Didn't Carol call you?
127
00:05:36,236 --> 00:05:37,803
Peter's got the measles.
128
00:05:39,173 --> 00:05:41,050
Yeah. Maybe you didn't
get the message yet.
129
00:05:41,074 --> 00:05:43,574
I'd appreciate it if
you'd drop by the house
130
00:05:43,610 --> 00:05:44,709
and check him over.
131
00:05:44,744 --> 00:05:45,844
Ah. Thanks.
132
00:05:45,879 --> 00:05:47,478
I'll see you there. Bye.
133
00:05:59,193 --> 00:06:00,292
Oh, Dr. Porter.
134
00:06:00,327 --> 00:06:01,392
Please come in.
135
00:06:01,428 --> 00:06:02,672
How are you, Carol?
136
00:06:02,696 --> 00:06:05,430
Oh, fine. I'm sure glad
you got here so soon.
137
00:06:05,465 --> 00:06:08,166
Now not only Peter,
but Jan has the measles.
138
00:06:08,202 --> 00:06:09,667
That's pretty sneaky,
139
00:06:09,703 --> 00:06:11,281
trying to get two
for the price of one.
140
00:06:11,305 --> 00:06:13,416
Well, I'll check her as
soon as I finish with Peter.
141
00:06:13,440 --> 00:06:15,340
Oh, good. Will you tell
Peter I'll be right up?
142
00:06:15,375 --> 00:06:17,175
I'm fixing something
in the kitchen for Jan.
143
00:06:17,211 --> 00:06:18,676
He's upstairs, right?
144
00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:21,179
Yeah. Boys' room...
First one on the right.
145
00:06:21,215 --> 00:06:22,981
See you in a couple of minutes.
146
00:06:28,222 --> 00:06:29,432
Mom?!
147
00:06:29,456 --> 00:06:31,034
But, Peter, I am a doctor.
148
00:06:31,058 --> 00:06:34,492
I've always taken care
of your mother's girls.
149
00:06:34,527 --> 00:06:36,094
Then you're a girls' doctor!
150
00:06:36,129 --> 00:06:37,495
No, I'm not.
151
00:06:37,530 --> 00:06:39,464
I take care of little boys, too.
152
00:06:39,499 --> 00:06:43,335
I'm a big boy! Mom! Mom!
153
00:06:43,370 --> 00:06:44,881
What is it? What happened?
154
00:06:44,905 --> 00:06:46,371
Come here.
155
00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:48,639
Excuse me.
156
00:06:49,943 --> 00:06:51,276
Mom, she's a woman.
157
00:06:51,311 --> 00:06:54,145
We go to Dr. Cameron... a guy.
158
00:06:54,181 --> 00:06:57,148
But, Peter, a
doctor is a doctor.
159
00:06:57,184 --> 00:06:59,462
They don't take care
of just boys or girls.
160
00:06:59,486 --> 00:07:00,763
They take care of both.
161
00:07:00,787 --> 00:07:02,820
Well, she's not
taking care of me both.
162
00:07:02,856 --> 00:07:04,033
Mom!
163
00:07:04,057 --> 00:07:05,023
What is it?
164
00:07:05,058 --> 00:07:06,024
Come quick!
165
00:07:06,059 --> 00:07:07,359
Oh, what in the world...?
166
00:07:07,394 --> 00:07:09,272
Would you please
explain it to him?
167
00:07:09,296 --> 00:07:11,897
Now, Peter, you're
being very silly about this.
168
00:07:11,932 --> 00:07:13,176
Mom!
169
00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:14,699
Coming! Coming!
170
00:07:15,969 --> 00:07:17,502
Jan, what's...
what's the matter?
171
00:07:17,537 --> 00:07:19,983
Can't you see? There's a
strange man in my room!
172
00:07:20,007 --> 00:07:22,385
If you put one hand on this
girl, I'll... I'll call the police!
173
00:07:22,409 --> 00:07:23,775
Mrs. Brady, I presume.
174
00:07:23,810 --> 00:07:26,089
I think you presume too
much... Breaking and entering
175
00:07:26,113 --> 00:07:27,957
and frightening
a poor little girl.
176
00:07:27,981 --> 00:07:29,981
You better have a
good explanation for this.
177
00:07:30,017 --> 00:07:32,617
Well, I think I have a
rather good explanation.
178
00:07:32,652 --> 00:07:34,619
You see, I'm a pediatrician.
179
00:07:34,654 --> 00:07:36,254
Then what are you doing here?
180
00:07:36,290 --> 00:07:37,722
I never heard of a doctor
181
00:07:37,757 --> 00:07:39,235
going door to door.
182
00:07:39,259 --> 00:07:42,493
Mrs. Brady, I've been
taking care of Mike's kids,
183
00:07:42,529 --> 00:07:44,829
well, from the time
they were born.
184
00:07:44,864 --> 00:07:46,464
He asked me to come over.
185
00:07:46,499 --> 00:07:47,832
Alice brought me up.
186
00:07:47,867 --> 00:07:49,034
Oh.
187
00:07:49,069 --> 00:07:51,381
Doctor, I'm sorry. I...
188
00:07:51,405 --> 00:07:54,406
My face must be
as red as her dots.
189
00:07:54,441 --> 00:07:56,219
Well, Mike didn't tell me
190
00:07:56,243 --> 00:07:57,520
that he phoned you,
191
00:07:57,544 --> 00:08:00,045
so, naturally, when I
saw a strange man...
192
00:08:00,080 --> 00:08:01,391
How can I apologize?
193
00:08:01,415 --> 00:08:03,648
You already
have... very sweetly.
194
00:08:03,683 --> 00:08:07,118
Well, uh... gee, I-I
called Dr. Peter... Porter.
195
00:08:07,154 --> 00:08:10,555
Uh, she's in the room
with Porter... Peter!
196
00:08:10,590 --> 00:08:12,890
You mean Katherine
Porter? You know her?
197
00:08:12,926 --> 00:08:15,360
No, but I've heard of her.
She's an excellent doctor.
198
00:08:15,395 --> 00:08:17,329
A girl's doctor!
199
00:08:17,364 --> 00:08:19,064
Why don't you just relax, Jan?
200
00:08:19,099 --> 00:08:21,333
Well, I'll go in and
talk to Dr. Porter.
201
00:08:21,368 --> 00:08:24,269
I'm sure I can just
straighten this whole thing out
202
00:08:24,304 --> 00:08:25,603
in a few minutes.
203
00:08:27,140 --> 00:08:29,907
Meantime, Jan and I
can get better acquainted.
204
00:08:29,943 --> 00:08:32,388
Only if you keep your distance.
205
00:08:32,412 --> 00:08:35,046
Jan... Sir.
206
00:08:39,152 --> 00:08:40,352
Oh, Mike.
207
00:08:40,387 --> 00:08:41,686
Listen. Conference time.
208
00:08:41,721 --> 00:08:43,032
Well, I was just going in to...
209
00:08:43,056 --> 00:08:45,456
No. Come on, come on.
210
00:08:49,896 --> 00:08:51,874
What's with the
conference at a time like this
211
00:08:51,898 --> 00:08:53,876
when we have a kid
upstairs with the measles?
212
00:08:53,900 --> 00:08:55,533
Two kids. Jan has
the measles, too.
213
00:08:55,568 --> 00:08:56,701
Oh, wow.
214
00:08:56,736 --> 00:08:58,348
What did the doctor say?
215
00:08:58,372 --> 00:09:01,306
Which one? There are
two doctors up there.
216
00:09:01,341 --> 00:09:03,108
Why two?
217
00:09:03,143 --> 00:09:04,854
Well, naturally, I
called Dr. Porter.
218
00:09:04,878 --> 00:09:06,755
And, naturally, you
called Dr. Cameron.
219
00:09:06,779 --> 00:09:08,046
One and one makes two.
220
00:09:08,081 --> 00:09:10,915
Amazing. Two doctors
both making house calls.
221
00:09:10,950 --> 00:09:13,051
They may be drummed
out of the AMA.
222
00:09:13,086 --> 00:09:15,487
You haven't heard
the rest of the story.
223
00:09:15,522 --> 00:09:17,389
Dr. Porter is a woman doctor.
224
00:09:18,758 --> 00:09:20,325
Oh.
225
00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:22,427
And Peter doesn't
want a woman doctor.
226
00:09:23,796 --> 00:09:25,663
Honey, I can't say I blame him.
227
00:09:25,698 --> 00:09:27,832
A guy doesn't want
a woman, you know...
228
00:09:27,867 --> 00:09:30,001
taking his temperature.
229
00:09:30,037 --> 00:09:33,171
Well, Jan isn't exactly thrilled
about a man taking hers.
230
00:09:33,206 --> 00:09:35,973
Dr. Cameron's a
very fine doctor.
231
00:09:36,009 --> 00:09:37,742
Well, Dr. Porter's a
very fine doctor, too.
232
00:09:37,777 --> 00:09:39,944
I mean she's taken
marvelous care of the girls for...
233
00:09:39,979 --> 00:09:41,279
What's wrong?
234
00:09:41,314 --> 00:09:43,159
We've got the measles.
235
00:09:43,183 --> 00:09:44,327
All four of us.
236
00:09:44,351 --> 00:09:46,791
Correction: all six of us.
237
00:09:50,623 --> 00:09:53,491
You mean Jan and
Peter have them, too?
238
00:09:53,527 --> 00:09:55,760
Well, you better
call Dr. Porter.
239
00:09:55,795 --> 00:09:57,162
Dr. Cameron.
240
00:09:57,197 --> 00:09:58,996
Dr. Porter.
241
00:09:59,032 --> 00:10:00,065
Dr. Cameron!
242
00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:01,366
Hold it.
243
00:10:01,401 --> 00:10:02,700
They're both upstairs.
244
00:10:02,735 --> 00:10:04,436
I like Dr. Cameron.
245
00:10:04,471 --> 00:10:06,137
He gives lollipops.
246
00:10:06,173 --> 00:10:08,706
Dr. Porter gives
all-day suckers.
247
00:10:08,741 --> 00:10:10,041
Doctors must have
248
00:10:10,077 --> 00:10:11,887
an arrangement with dentists.
249
00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:22,887
It surely was kind of
both of you to come.
250
00:10:22,922 --> 00:10:25,022
We, uh... would like, uh...
251
00:10:25,058 --> 00:10:28,359
What I mean to...
Well, Mike and I, uh...
252
00:10:28,395 --> 00:10:29,939
We certainly are going
253
00:10:29,963 --> 00:10:31,840
to discuss this situation.
254
00:10:31,864 --> 00:10:32,830
We understand.
255
00:10:32,865 --> 00:10:34,110
It certainly isn't necessary
256
00:10:34,134 --> 00:10:35,178
to double your doctors.
257
00:10:35,202 --> 00:10:37,302
Well, we want
who's best for the...
258
00:10:37,337 --> 00:10:39,237
what's best for the children.
259
00:10:39,272 --> 00:10:41,772
Fine. You make your choice.
260
00:10:41,808 --> 00:10:43,419
That's right, Dr. Cameron.
261
00:10:43,443 --> 00:10:45,354
Right. And may the best man...
262
00:10:45,378 --> 00:10:47,356
uh... or woman win.
263
00:10:48,948 --> 00:10:50,248
Thanks again.
264
00:10:50,283 --> 00:10:51,649
Bye.
265
00:10:58,891 --> 00:11:02,059
Oh, honey, will you
stop worrying and relax?
266
00:11:02,095 --> 00:11:03,539
We'll use your doctor.
267
00:11:03,563 --> 00:11:05,930
I wouldn't dream of it.
268
00:11:05,965 --> 00:11:06,697
Why?
269
00:11:06,733 --> 00:11:08,032
If we used my doctor,
270
00:11:08,067 --> 00:11:10,602
and anything went wrong,
I'd never forgive myself.
271
00:11:10,637 --> 00:11:13,138
Oh, fine! And we use my doctor,
272
00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:15,418
and I'd never forgive myself.
273
00:11:15,442 --> 00:11:16,619
Nothing doing!
274
00:11:16,643 --> 00:11:20,145
Okay, if you insist,
we'll use my doctor.
275
00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:21,812
Fine. Hold it!
276
00:11:21,848 --> 00:11:23,148
Uh-uh-uh.
277
00:11:23,183 --> 00:11:24,415
Hold what?
278
00:11:24,451 --> 00:11:26,083
You outmaneuvered me.
279
00:11:26,119 --> 00:11:27,230
Use your doctor.
280
00:11:27,254 --> 00:11:29,165
That's what you
wanted all along...
281
00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:30,299
To use your doctor.
282
00:11:30,323 --> 00:11:31,456
You object?
283
00:11:31,491 --> 00:11:32,857
Then we can use your doctor.
284
00:11:32,892 --> 00:11:34,903
Oh, no. That's not
going to work either.
285
00:11:34,927 --> 00:11:37,262
Oh, come on, Mike.
Why don't we just put it off
286
00:11:37,297 --> 00:11:38,963
until you can
decide which doctor?
287
00:11:38,998 --> 00:11:40,598
At this point,
288
00:11:40,634 --> 00:11:43,154
I'd settle for a witch doctor.
289
00:11:55,615 --> 00:11:56,881
Oh, Greg.
290
00:11:56,916 --> 00:11:58,749
You won my railroad.
291
00:11:58,785 --> 00:11:59,828
I'll be a sport.
292
00:11:59,852 --> 00:12:01,364
You can ride on it free.
293
00:12:01,388 --> 00:12:02,820
Thanks a lot.
294
00:12:02,855 --> 00:12:05,122
It's your turn, Peter.
295
00:12:05,158 --> 00:12:07,625
All I need is two more houses.
296
00:12:07,661 --> 00:12:09,126
A six.
297
00:12:09,162 --> 00:12:11,996
Aw, missed it.
298
00:12:12,031 --> 00:12:14,065
Boy, this is the life, isn't it?
299
00:12:14,100 --> 00:12:17,702
Yeah. If you have to get sick,
sure can't beat the measles.
300
00:12:17,737 --> 00:12:18,469
That's right.
301
00:12:18,505 --> 00:12:19,505
No medicine.
302
00:12:19,539 --> 00:12:21,617
Inside or out.
Like shots, I mean.
303
00:12:21,641 --> 00:12:23,174
Don't even mention shots.
304
00:12:23,210 --> 00:12:24,975
Yuck!
305
00:12:25,011 --> 00:12:26,077
Where did you land?
306
00:12:26,112 --> 00:12:27,845
I won a 90-foot yacht.
307
00:12:27,880 --> 00:12:30,014
Who owned that big yacht?
308
00:12:30,049 --> 00:12:31,516
Jan.
309
00:12:31,551 --> 00:12:34,285
Who cares? I get seasick anyway.
310
00:12:34,321 --> 00:12:36,854
Marcia, would you
please tell Bobby to stop it?
311
00:12:36,889 --> 00:12:39,090
Listen, you kids. You
promised you'd stay
312
00:12:39,125 --> 00:12:40,670
in the other room, and color.
313
00:12:40,694 --> 00:12:43,228
That's what we're
doing. We're coloring.
314
00:12:43,263 --> 00:12:44,795
I colored a tiger,
315
00:12:44,831 --> 00:12:46,964
then Bobby colored a giraffe,
316
00:12:46,999 --> 00:12:49,400
and now Bobby wants to color me.
317
00:12:49,436 --> 00:12:50,702
You?
318
00:12:50,737 --> 00:12:52,136
My spots.
319
00:12:52,171 --> 00:12:54,205
I thought they'd
look better green.
320
00:12:54,241 --> 00:12:56,073
Go back and color your books.
321
00:12:56,109 --> 00:12:59,143
And, Bobby, her spots
would look rotten in green.
322
00:12:59,178 --> 00:13:01,045
Hey, how about blue?
323
00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:02,680
I could make her spots blue.
324
00:13:02,716 --> 00:13:04,460
I like them red, like they are.
325
00:13:04,484 --> 00:13:06,984
Go on, you two. Back
to your coloring books.
326
00:13:07,019 --> 00:13:08,085
Oh, come on, Cindy.
327
00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:09,665
Go on.
328
00:13:09,689 --> 00:13:11,822
Those two act
like such children.
329
00:13:11,858 --> 00:13:14,191
Come on, Jan. It's your turn.
330
00:13:14,227 --> 00:13:16,628
Boy, I sure am
lonesome for Mrs. Kittridge
331
00:13:16,663 --> 00:13:17,962
and that algebra class.
332
00:13:17,997 --> 00:13:19,364
I could almost cry.
333
00:13:19,399 --> 00:13:21,299
Boo-hoo.
334
00:13:21,334 --> 00:13:24,636
Yeah. Everything
would be perfect...
335
00:13:24,671 --> 00:13:26,203
except for the doctors.
336
00:13:26,239 --> 00:13:28,539
Especially that woman doctor.
337
00:13:28,575 --> 00:13:31,242
Yeah. Women are
supposed to be nurses.
338
00:13:31,278 --> 00:13:33,544
Men are supposed to be doctors.
339
00:13:33,580 --> 00:13:36,247
Who says so? There
are men nurses.
340
00:13:36,283 --> 00:13:37,515
Where?
341
00:13:37,550 --> 00:13:39,049
Yeah. Name one place.
342
00:13:39,085 --> 00:13:40,551
The county hospital.
343
00:13:40,587 --> 00:13:42,431
I just won it and, from now on,
344
00:13:42,455 --> 00:13:46,491
it's going to have nothing but
women doctors and men nurses.
345
00:13:46,526 --> 00:13:48,959
When are you girls
going to give up?
346
00:13:48,995 --> 00:13:52,830
Everybody knows men doctors
are better than women doctors.
347
00:13:52,865 --> 00:13:54,165
You're not everybody.
348
00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:55,667
You're not even anybody.
349
00:13:55,702 --> 00:13:57,168
Did you hear that, Greg?
350
00:13:57,203 --> 00:13:58,748
You keep talking
like that, girls, and...
351
00:13:58,772 --> 00:14:02,139
Gentlemen, if you don't like
the conversation in this room...
352
00:14:02,175 --> 00:14:05,810
Which, by coincidence,
happens to be a woman's room.
353
00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:07,077
True.
354
00:14:07,113 --> 00:14:08,713
Then why don't you get lost?
355
00:14:08,748 --> 00:14:10,047
Scram.
356
00:14:10,082 --> 00:14:12,328
Come on, Peter.
We can take a hint.
357
00:14:12,352 --> 00:14:14,819
Yeah. It's time
for lunch, anyway.
358
00:14:14,854 --> 00:14:16,321
And just for that, Marcia,
359
00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,156
no free rides on my railroad.
360
00:14:26,098 --> 00:14:28,366
I know there's another
one somewhere.
361
00:14:28,401 --> 00:14:30,501
I just remembered
where. In the garage.
362
00:14:30,537 --> 00:14:31,869
I'll be right back.
363
00:14:36,209 --> 00:14:37,241
Is that you, Cindy?
364
00:14:37,276 --> 00:14:38,354
Yes, Mother.
365
00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:40,678
Your orange juice
is coming right up.
366
00:14:43,082 --> 00:14:45,149
Yours, too, Bobby.
367
00:14:47,286 --> 00:14:49,354
Oh, Marcia, can it wait?
368
00:14:52,959 --> 00:14:55,226
Greg, your father's
looking for a bell.
369
00:14:55,261 --> 00:14:58,062
Now please stop pounding
on those silly drums.
370
00:15:01,234 --> 00:15:02,734
Happy New Year, Jan.
371
00:15:05,271 --> 00:15:07,739
If you'll just wait a
minute, Sergeant Peter,
372
00:15:07,774 --> 00:15:09,874
your lunch will be right there.
373
00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:11,942
Oh, Alice, you know something?
374
00:15:11,978 --> 00:15:14,178
I bet, when I go
to sleep tonight,
375
00:15:14,213 --> 00:15:16,146
I'm going to dream about bells.
376
00:15:16,182 --> 00:15:18,249
I always dream about bells.
377
00:15:18,284 --> 00:15:20,551
They're always the same kind.
378
00:15:20,587 --> 00:15:21,952
Wedding bells.
379
00:15:23,122 --> 00:15:25,356
And then I wake up.
380
00:15:27,026 --> 00:15:29,059
I found it.
381
00:15:29,095 --> 00:15:30,628
No more bongo drums for Greg.
382
00:15:30,663 --> 00:15:31,996
Oh, thank goodness.
383
00:15:32,031 --> 00:15:33,898
Yeah. I kept getting the feeling
384
00:15:33,933 --> 00:15:36,166
that the natives
were getting restless.
385
00:15:36,202 --> 00:15:38,436
Come on, Mike. Let's
take these trays up.
386
00:15:38,471 --> 00:15:39,504
Okay.
387
00:15:39,539 --> 00:15:40,850
We got everything here?
388
00:15:40,874 --> 00:15:42,707
Well, I think so.
389
00:15:42,742 --> 00:15:44,575
There are six luncheon trays,
390
00:15:44,611 --> 00:15:45,943
uh... five comic books,
391
00:15:45,978 --> 00:15:48,846
four jigsaw puzzles,
♪ Three magic tricks ♪
392
00:15:48,882 --> 00:15:50,114
♪ Two ice cream bars ♪
393
00:15:50,149 --> 00:15:55,520
♪ And one cowbell. ♪
394
00:15:57,824 --> 00:16:01,191
It's sure great how some people
can sing, while other people
395
00:16:01,227 --> 00:16:02,405
are dying!
396
00:16:02,429 --> 00:16:03,761
Why is it
397
00:16:03,797 --> 00:16:05,841
that kids always
say they're dying?
398
00:16:05,865 --> 00:16:07,965
Because, to a child's mind,
399
00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:10,635
that is the super
way of getting even.
400
00:16:10,670 --> 00:16:12,014
You have to admit, though,
401
00:16:12,038 --> 00:16:14,016
the kids have been awfully good.
402
00:16:14,040 --> 00:16:16,251
After all, they're
uncomfortable, they're itchy...
403
00:16:16,275 --> 00:16:17,508
Yeah. And stuck up in bed.
404
00:16:17,544 --> 00:16:19,021
I think they've
been really great.
405
00:16:19,045 --> 00:16:20,489
Hardly any trouble at all.
406
00:16:24,751 --> 00:16:27,251
You were saying, Mrs. Brady?
407
00:16:27,286 --> 00:16:29,153
Coming! Coming!
408
00:16:29,188 --> 00:16:31,548
Onward and upward.
409
00:16:38,097 --> 00:16:40,275
After you, my dear
Miss Nightingale.
410
00:16:40,299 --> 00:16:41,766
Oh, thank you, kind sir.
411
00:16:51,210 --> 00:16:53,021
Okay, fellas, here
we are... lunch.
412
00:16:53,045 --> 00:16:54,178
Lunch, lunch.
413
00:16:54,213 --> 00:16:55,680
Everybody up.
414
00:16:55,715 --> 00:16:57,849
Everybody get in line
'cause it's chow time,
415
00:16:57,884 --> 00:16:59,595
and such chow you've never seen.
416
00:16:59,619 --> 00:17:02,059
There, Greg.
Isn't that beautiful?
417
00:17:04,056 --> 00:17:06,090
I'd really rather have bologna.
418
00:17:06,125 --> 00:17:07,825
Bologna?
419
00:17:07,861 --> 00:17:10,060
That's a feast fit for a king.
420
00:17:10,096 --> 00:17:12,930
Then give it to the king
and get me some bologna.
421
00:17:12,966 --> 00:17:14,877
Mike, he's sick and irritable.
422
00:17:14,901 --> 00:17:18,369
If he wants bologna,
then... Okay, okay.
423
00:17:18,404 --> 00:17:20,471
I'll get it.
424
00:17:20,507 --> 00:17:22,039
Bologna!
425
00:17:23,442 --> 00:17:26,343
Peter... there you go.
426
00:17:26,379 --> 00:17:27,612
Bobby...
427
00:17:27,647 --> 00:17:30,258
Cindy: Hey, Mom, whatever
happened to "ladies first"?
428
00:17:30,282 --> 00:17:31,282
Be right there.
429
00:17:31,317 --> 00:17:33,484
We came in this room first.
430
00:17:36,890 --> 00:17:39,323
Broccoli... yuck!
431
00:17:44,463 --> 00:17:46,797
Here we go.
432
00:17:46,833 --> 00:17:48,098
Oh, I'm starved.
433
00:17:48,134 --> 00:17:49,734
Me, too.
434
00:17:50,937 --> 00:17:52,548
Here you are, sweetheart.
435
00:17:52,572 --> 00:17:54,812
There... let me help you.
436
00:17:56,042 --> 00:17:57,675
How come I always get
437
00:17:57,710 --> 00:18:00,277
peanut butter and
jelly sandwiches?
438
00:18:00,312 --> 00:18:01,779
Because you love them.
439
00:18:01,814 --> 00:18:03,280
Oh, yeah.
440
00:18:03,315 --> 00:18:05,149
I keep forgetting.
441
00:18:06,686 --> 00:18:08,953
And last but not least...
442
00:18:08,988 --> 00:18:10,521
Where's the gravy?
443
00:18:10,557 --> 00:18:12,489
Oh, the gravy. I forgot.
444
00:18:12,525 --> 00:18:13,724
Gravy, coming up.
445
00:18:19,331 --> 00:18:21,432
We forgot the
gravy for Jan's food.
446
00:18:21,467 --> 00:18:24,035
She likes everything
all mushed together.
447
00:18:24,070 --> 00:18:25,135
Mushed?
448
00:18:30,877 --> 00:18:32,843
Peter and Bobby want mustard.
449
00:18:32,879 --> 00:18:34,845
All this up and down stairs...
450
00:18:34,881 --> 00:18:37,401
Have to pay a gym $100
for this much exercise.
451
00:18:42,555 --> 00:18:45,768
Now, Jan had chicken pox
452
00:18:45,792 --> 00:18:50,962
and, uh, Marcia and
Cindy had mumps.
453
00:18:50,997 --> 00:18:53,175
There. Well, whichever
doctor we choose,
454
00:18:53,199 --> 00:18:56,244
at least we'll have all the
information on all the kids.
455
00:18:56,268 --> 00:18:57,735
Oh, except for poison oak.
456
00:18:57,770 --> 00:19:00,137
Now, I know that
none of the boys had it.
457
00:19:00,172 --> 00:19:02,673
Well, none of the girls
had poison oak either.
458
00:19:02,709 --> 00:19:04,341
Okay, scratch poison oak.
459
00:19:04,376 --> 00:19:06,477
Oh, Alice.
460
00:19:08,347 --> 00:19:10,559
Greetings. How are things
in Brady General Hospital?
461
00:19:10,583 --> 00:19:12,728
Well, we're still featuring
measles. Take a look.
462
00:19:12,752 --> 00:19:14,930
What's this? Some kind
of wall-to-wall Scrabble.
463
00:19:14,954 --> 00:19:17,922
Hey, it's a marvelous new idea,
but we sure could use your help.
464
00:19:17,957 --> 00:19:20,324
What illnesses,
diseases do you recall?
465
00:19:20,359 --> 00:19:21,804
The doctors have kept records
466
00:19:21,828 --> 00:19:24,172
that they can transfer
from one to the other.
467
00:19:24,196 --> 00:19:25,496
Besides, this is wrong.
468
00:19:25,531 --> 00:19:28,243
Now, none of the kids have
had the shots for distemper.
469
00:19:28,267 --> 00:19:30,635
That's Tiger's column.
470
00:19:30,670 --> 00:19:33,604
I figured I might as well
keep a record for the vet.
471
00:19:34,841 --> 00:19:36,373
Greg.
472
00:19:36,408 --> 00:19:38,743
It's time for the kids'
ice cream sundaes.
473
00:19:38,778 --> 00:19:40,689
Ice cream sundaes?
It's almost dinner.
474
00:19:42,048 --> 00:19:43,180
That's Marcia.
475
00:19:43,215 --> 00:19:44,849
She's afraid we
didn't hear Greg.
476
00:19:44,884 --> 00:19:47,262
Kids. Just because they
have a few dots on their faces,
477
00:19:47,286 --> 00:19:50,532
they think they can
order everybody around.
478
00:19:50,556 --> 00:19:52,434
I think they're taking
advantage now.
479
00:19:52,458 --> 00:19:53,602
I've got to do something
480
00:19:53,626 --> 00:19:54,903
about this memory of mine.
481
00:19:54,927 --> 00:19:57,305
Mr. Brady, who was it
that had the flu last year
482
00:19:57,329 --> 00:19:59,908
that had to have one hot
buttered rum after another,
483
00:19:59,932 --> 00:20:02,432
in addition to crossword puzzles
484
00:20:02,468 --> 00:20:05,235
magnetic solitaire
game, dart board
485
00:20:05,271 --> 00:20:06,749
and a pair of nails...
486
00:20:06,773 --> 00:20:09,406
Twisted nails... that
had to be untwisted?
487
00:20:09,441 --> 00:20:11,175
Oh, now, that's enough.
488
00:20:11,210 --> 00:20:14,111
Which he never
could get untwisted.
489
00:20:15,715 --> 00:20:18,049
That was a very
difficult puzzle.
490
00:20:19,952 --> 00:20:20,918
Mike.
491
00:20:20,953 --> 00:20:22,419
Hmm?
492
00:20:22,454 --> 00:20:23,921
You know, we almost had
493
00:20:23,956 --> 00:20:25,690
a very foolish
argument last night.
494
00:20:25,725 --> 00:20:27,892
About the doctors.
495
00:20:27,927 --> 00:20:29,393
Look, we're both mature adults
496
00:20:29,428 --> 00:20:31,929
with a reasonable amount
of intelligence, right?
497
00:20:31,964 --> 00:20:34,431
Well, I think this business
498
00:20:34,466 --> 00:20:36,901
of deciding upon a
doctor should be handled
499
00:20:36,936 --> 00:20:39,704
on a very Logical,
reasonable, intelligent level.
500
00:20:39,739 --> 00:20:41,305
Well, I couldn't agree more.
501
00:20:41,340 --> 00:20:42,973
What do you suggest?
502
00:20:43,009 --> 00:20:44,408
Let's toss a coin.
503
00:20:44,443 --> 00:20:45,910
That's beautiful.
504
00:20:45,945 --> 00:20:48,779
You happen to have one with
you? I mean, both sides the same?
505
00:20:48,815 --> 00:20:50,214
Oh, look, Mike, I'm serious.
506
00:20:50,249 --> 00:20:51,582
They're both fine doctors,
507
00:20:51,617 --> 00:20:53,751
and we know that,
whichever one we choose,
508
00:20:53,786 --> 00:20:55,330
the children are going
to have the very best.
509
00:20:55,354 --> 00:20:56,954
Wait a minute. The children.
510
00:20:56,989 --> 00:20:59,590
The children are the
ones who are sick, right?
511
00:20:59,625 --> 00:21:00,324
Right.
512
00:21:00,359 --> 00:21:02,693
Well, they've met
both of the doctors.
513
00:21:02,729 --> 00:21:05,096
Let's let them make the choice.
514
00:21:05,131 --> 00:21:06,964
But, girls, you can't avoid it.
515
00:21:06,999 --> 00:21:08,999
Listen, there's
going to come a time
516
00:21:09,035 --> 00:21:12,103
when you're going to have
to use a doctor that's a man.
517
00:21:12,138 --> 00:21:14,238
Look. What if you
were on a sinking ship,
518
00:21:14,273 --> 00:21:16,673
and it was going
down for the third time,
519
00:21:16,709 --> 00:21:18,542
and you developed a bad cold,
520
00:21:18,577 --> 00:21:21,578
and the only doctor available
was the ship's doctor...
521
00:21:21,614 --> 00:21:23,114
Who happened to be a man?
522
00:21:23,149 --> 00:21:25,182
Well, then, what would you do?
523
00:21:25,218 --> 00:21:28,052
Drown!
524
00:21:28,087 --> 00:21:29,586
Fellas, there's no difference
525
00:21:29,622 --> 00:21:31,889
between a woman
doctor and a man doctor.
526
00:21:31,924 --> 00:21:33,690
But, Dad, you're the one
527
00:21:33,726 --> 00:21:36,727
who told us about
the birds and the bees.
528
00:21:46,172 --> 00:21:48,117
You got nowhere
with the girls, huh?
529
00:21:48,141 --> 00:21:50,274
Nope. Same progress
with the boys?
530
00:21:50,309 --> 00:21:52,542
Yup.
531
00:21:52,578 --> 00:21:55,179
Doctors, doctors.
532
00:21:57,216 --> 00:22:01,051
Carol, you have your
own doctor, right?
533
00:22:01,087 --> 00:22:02,052
Right.
534
00:22:02,088 --> 00:22:03,128
You have your doctor.
535
00:22:03,156 --> 00:22:04,188
I have my doctor.
536
00:22:04,223 --> 00:22:05,389
Suppose I said to you,
537
00:22:05,424 --> 00:22:07,591
"From now on, you
have to use my doctor."
538
00:22:07,626 --> 00:22:08,993
What would you say to me?
539
00:22:09,028 --> 00:22:10,873
Now, Mike, let's
not go into that.
540
00:22:10,897 --> 00:22:12,540
Exactly. And that's just
the way I would react.
541
00:22:12,564 --> 00:22:14,209
We haven't switched
to one doctor
542
00:22:14,233 --> 00:22:16,200
just because we got married.
543
00:22:16,235 --> 00:22:17,701
That's true.
544
00:22:17,736 --> 00:22:19,870
Then why should the
kids switch doctors?
545
00:22:19,906 --> 00:22:22,639
How about that? I'm a genius.
546
00:22:22,675 --> 00:22:24,341
If you're such a genius,
547
00:22:24,376 --> 00:22:27,344
how come you didn't
think of it yesterday?
548
00:22:27,379 --> 00:22:29,413
I'm what you call a slow genius.
549
00:22:29,448 --> 00:22:31,748
Well, we'll just
have two doctors.
550
00:22:31,784 --> 00:22:35,385
Yeah. One for the boys
and one for the girls. Simple.
551
00:22:37,156 --> 00:22:40,090
That must be a member
of our medical staff.
552
00:22:40,126 --> 00:22:41,959
I wonder whose, yours or mine?
553
00:22:47,133 --> 00:22:48,765
Oh, come in.
554
00:22:48,801 --> 00:22:50,078
Dr. Cameron's here, too. Good.
555
00:22:50,102 --> 00:22:51,568
How are the children?
556
00:22:51,603 --> 00:22:53,103
Oh, they're getting
along just fine.
557
00:22:53,139 --> 00:22:55,572
We thought, before you went
upstairs to see the children,
558
00:22:55,607 --> 00:22:57,219
we'd like to talk
to you for a minute.
559
00:22:57,243 --> 00:22:58,709
Well, of course.
560
00:22:58,744 --> 00:23:02,779
Mike and I have finally
reached a decision.
561
00:23:02,815 --> 00:23:04,459
Some families have two cars,
562
00:23:04,483 --> 00:23:06,528
some families have two phones...
563
00:23:06,552 --> 00:23:08,118
Why not two doctors?
564
00:23:08,154 --> 00:23:09,619
Why not?
565
00:23:09,655 --> 00:23:10,935
Fine with us.
566
00:23:12,591 --> 00:23:14,837
Uh... by the way,
if you call my office
567
00:23:14,861 --> 00:23:16,872
and a man answers,
don't hang up.
568
00:23:16,896 --> 00:23:18,662
It'll be him.
569
00:23:18,697 --> 00:23:20,231
Dr. Cameron?
570
00:23:20,266 --> 00:23:21,098
Well, yes.
571
00:23:21,133 --> 00:23:22,733
Since Dr. Porter and I met here,
572
00:23:22,768 --> 00:23:24,568
we've been
complaining to each other
573
00:23:24,603 --> 00:23:26,136
about our long hours,
574
00:23:26,172 --> 00:23:27,850
and the workload, and the...
575
00:23:27,874 --> 00:23:30,174
well, the problems of not having
576
00:23:30,209 --> 00:23:32,076
a... a... an associate.
577
00:23:32,111 --> 00:23:35,079
So we've decided to
combine our practice.
578
00:23:35,114 --> 00:23:36,580
Well, congratulations.
579
00:23:36,615 --> 00:23:38,215
Hey, that's wonderful.
580
00:23:40,086 --> 00:23:41,818
Uh... how long have you had
581
00:23:41,854 --> 00:23:44,421
that red spot on your cheek?
582
00:23:44,456 --> 00:23:45,655
What red spot?
583
00:23:45,691 --> 00:23:47,624
Dr. Porter?
584
00:23:47,659 --> 00:23:50,394
And the one on your chin.
585
00:23:50,429 --> 00:23:53,330
Oh, no. Don't tell me
he's got the measles.
586
00:23:53,366 --> 00:23:54,709
Of course, we can't be sure
587
00:23:54,733 --> 00:23:56,345
until he's had an examination.
588
00:23:56,369 --> 00:23:58,168
Well, we're practicing
together now.
589
00:23:58,204 --> 00:23:59,636
Which one of us do you want?
590
00:23:59,671 --> 00:24:01,138
Well, I think,
591
00:24:01,173 --> 00:24:03,941
in order to prove a
point to the boys...
592
00:24:03,976 --> 00:24:05,109
Oh, never mind.
593
00:24:05,144 --> 00:24:07,912
Dr. Cameron, he's all yours.
594
00:24:19,725 --> 00:24:22,859
Measles, measles, measles.
595
00:24:22,895 --> 00:24:25,029
Well, all the kids have
now had the measles.
596
00:24:25,064 --> 00:24:26,363
So have I.
597
00:24:26,399 --> 00:24:27,864
Well, I had them years ago.
598
00:24:27,900 --> 00:24:30,367
Looks like the Bradys are
finished with the measles.
599
00:24:30,403 --> 00:24:32,883
Hold it.
600
00:24:38,577 --> 00:24:40,222
You're not through yet.
601
00:24:40,246 --> 00:24:42,046
Alice, don't tell me
602
00:24:42,081 --> 00:24:43,713
you're coming down
with the measles.
603
00:24:43,749 --> 00:24:45,049
Oh, I hope so.
604
00:24:45,084 --> 00:24:46,550
I'd hate to think
605
00:24:46,585 --> 00:24:49,785
I was just learning
how to blush at my age.
606
00:24:51,257 --> 00:24:52,923
"Alice."
39001
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