All language subtitles for The Andy Griffith Show S02E24 County Nurse 1080p Amazon WEB-DL DD+ 2 0 x264-TrollHD (1)_track4_[eng]

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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,336 --> 00:00:05,473 ( whistling sprightly tune ) 2 00:00:09,710 --> 00:00:12,313 Starring andy griffith... 3 00:00:12,346 --> 00:00:15,383 With ronny howard. 4 00:00:15,416 --> 00:00:18,752 Also starring don knotts. 5 00:00:32,833 --> 00:00:34,568 ( growls ) 6 00:00:34,602 --> 00:00:37,471 ( shrieking ) 7 00:00:56,490 --> 00:00:57,791 Hi. 8 00:00:57,825 --> 00:00:59,293 Hi. 9 00:00:59,327 --> 00:01:01,629 Guess you're wonderin' What I'm doing. 10 00:01:01,662 --> 00:01:04,132 Uh, yeah, I wonder What you're doing. 11 00:01:04,165 --> 00:01:05,166 Karate. 12 00:01:05,199 --> 00:01:06,267 Karate? 13 00:01:06,300 --> 00:01:07,335 Karate. 14 00:01:07,368 --> 00:01:08,536 What's karate? 15 00:01:08,569 --> 00:01:10,404 Ancient form Of self-defense-- 16 00:01:10,438 --> 00:01:11,739 Primitive, vicious. 17 00:01:11,772 --> 00:01:14,208 You know what kind Of weapons we use? 18 00:01:14,242 --> 00:01:15,209 No. 19 00:01:15,243 --> 00:01:16,477 None. Just these. 20 00:01:16,510 --> 00:01:17,645 Just the hands? 21 00:01:17,678 --> 00:01:19,713 This is the most Deadly form of attack 22 00:01:19,747 --> 00:01:20,814 Known to man. 23 00:01:20,848 --> 00:01:22,683 Makes judo look Like child's play. 24 00:01:22,716 --> 00:01:23,751 As for boxing 25 00:01:23,784 --> 00:01:25,486 I'd hate to see What'd happen 26 00:01:25,519 --> 00:01:27,321 To joe louis or Rocky marciano 27 00:01:27,355 --> 00:01:28,822 If they ever Tried to tangle 28 00:01:28,856 --> 00:01:30,424 With one of Us karate men. 29 00:01:30,458 --> 00:01:31,692 Then you're a expert. 30 00:01:31,725 --> 00:01:32,893 Uh, well, no. 31 00:01:32,926 --> 00:01:35,263 I mean, I just got The book this morning. 32 00:01:35,296 --> 00:01:37,498 But I will be an Expert before long. 33 00:01:37,531 --> 00:01:39,467 Andy, this is Just fascinating. 34 00:01:39,500 --> 00:01:42,303 You know where most of The karate moves come from? No. 35 00:01:42,336 --> 00:01:43,771 From animals. From animals? 36 00:01:43,804 --> 00:01:46,174 [ shrieks ] 37 00:01:46,207 --> 00:01:48,642 Know what that is? 38 00:01:48,676 --> 00:01:49,777 That's a hawk, 39 00:01:49,810 --> 00:01:51,412 Clawing with Its deadly talon. 40 00:01:51,445 --> 00:01:53,381 Oh, deadly talons, Oh. 41 00:01:53,414 --> 00:01:55,316 Yeah. Now watch this. 42 00:02:04,758 --> 00:02:06,794 You better move out, Move out of the way. 43 00:02:06,827 --> 00:02:08,196 Move? Oh. 44 00:02:08,229 --> 00:02:09,397 [ grunts ] 45 00:02:09,430 --> 00:02:10,931 I got you. 46 00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:12,533 Know what animal That is? 47 00:02:12,566 --> 00:02:14,502 I ain't got The first notion. 48 00:02:14,535 --> 00:02:16,404 That's the bull elk. 49 00:02:16,437 --> 00:02:18,339 See, he's striking with His mighty cloven hooves. 50 00:02:18,372 --> 00:02:20,708 Oh, I see, oh. 51 00:02:20,741 --> 00:02:22,243 Guess what animal this is. 52 00:02:22,276 --> 00:02:23,711 Ready? 53 00:02:32,286 --> 00:02:34,955 What is it? 54 00:02:34,988 --> 00:02:37,258 I don't know. 55 00:02:37,291 --> 00:02:38,759 Guess. 56 00:02:38,792 --> 00:02:40,761 A worm? 57 00:02:42,430 --> 00:02:43,731 Andy! 58 00:02:43,764 --> 00:02:45,366 Well, it was wiggling. 59 00:02:45,399 --> 00:02:47,835 Hey, this is a deadly animal, Vicious, a killer! 60 00:02:47,868 --> 00:02:49,270 A mad worm? 61 00:02:49,303 --> 00:02:51,305 It's a rattlesnake! 62 00:02:51,339 --> 00:02:54,342 Sss! Sss! See? 63 00:02:54,375 --> 00:02:56,710 Oh, yeah, it's as plain As can be, 64 00:02:56,744 --> 00:02:59,413 Once you put the hiss in, Scary, too. 65 00:02:59,447 --> 00:03:00,748 You bet it is! 66 00:03:00,781 --> 00:03:02,416 Andy, these moves Are just devastating! 67 00:03:02,450 --> 00:03:03,484 And you know why? 68 00:03:03,517 --> 00:03:04,552 Because in karate 69 00:03:04,585 --> 00:03:05,986 We really build These hands up 70 00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:07,955 Till the edges Are just like steel. 71 00:03:07,988 --> 00:03:09,390 Like steel. 72 00:03:09,423 --> 00:03:12,293 With one blow, andy, We can split a plank. 73 00:03:12,326 --> 00:03:13,561 No, you can't. 74 00:03:13,594 --> 00:03:14,728 No! 75 00:03:14,762 --> 00:03:15,796 ( thud ) 76 00:03:21,001 --> 00:03:23,237 Hurt your hand, barn? 77 00:03:23,271 --> 00:03:24,505 Mm-mmm. 78 00:03:24,538 --> 00:03:27,475 Hi, fellas. 79 00:03:27,508 --> 00:03:28,876 Well, howdy, mary. 80 00:03:28,909 --> 00:03:31,779 How's every little thing In the county nursin' game? 81 00:03:31,812 --> 00:03:33,013 Not bad. 82 00:03:33,046 --> 00:03:35,949 How's it with The law and order boys? 83 00:03:37,651 --> 00:03:39,453 Oh, barney's An expert on karate 84 00:03:39,487 --> 00:03:41,021 And he was Just showing me 85 00:03:41,054 --> 00:03:43,591 How he can split a plank With one blow. 86 00:03:43,624 --> 00:03:45,526 ( yelling ) 87 00:03:46,994 --> 00:03:48,262 Oh, hi, mary. 88 00:03:48,296 --> 00:03:49,630 How's every Little thing 89 00:03:49,663 --> 00:03:51,499 In the county Nursin' game? 90 00:03:51,532 --> 00:03:52,700 Not bad. 91 00:03:52,733 --> 00:03:54,902 How's it with The law and order bo...? 92 00:03:54,935 --> 00:03:56,437 I've got the feeling 93 00:03:56,470 --> 00:03:58,639 That we've all been Through this before. 94 00:03:58,672 --> 00:04:00,908 How's that hand of yours Coming along? 95 00:04:00,941 --> 00:04:02,376 Oh, it's fine. Fine. 96 00:04:02,410 --> 00:04:04,478 What brings you Around these parts? 97 00:04:04,512 --> 00:04:07,681 Well, I'm on my way Up to rafe hollister's place. 98 00:04:07,715 --> 00:04:10,418 You got dealings with rafe? 99 00:04:10,451 --> 00:04:12,320 You know that drive that's on 100 00:04:12,353 --> 00:04:14,888 To get everybody inoculated Against tetanus? 101 00:04:14,922 --> 00:04:17,891 You think you're gonna make Rafe hollister take a shot? 102 00:04:17,925 --> 00:04:19,360 Boy, that'll be the day. 103 00:04:19,393 --> 00:04:21,362 Rafe don't hold much With doctorin'. 104 00:04:21,395 --> 00:04:22,596 That's what I've heard 105 00:04:22,630 --> 00:04:24,465 But if I don't get Rafe hollister 106 00:04:24,498 --> 00:04:26,834 I won't get any Of the farmers up that way. 107 00:04:26,867 --> 00:04:29,403 He's a leader of That group up there. 108 00:04:29,437 --> 00:04:31,439 Barney: You might as well Forget it... 109 00:04:31,472 --> 00:04:33,474 Wait. Rafe hollister Hasn't had his shot? 110 00:04:33,507 --> 00:04:34,775 No. 111 00:04:34,808 --> 00:04:37,545 Oh, well, rafe will have To take his shot. 112 00:04:37,578 --> 00:04:38,912 Oh, yes, rafe hollister 113 00:04:38,946 --> 00:04:40,548 Will take a shot 114 00:04:40,581 --> 00:04:43,417 And we'll get that whole crowd Up there to take a shot. 115 00:04:43,451 --> 00:04:45,319 I'll help you. 116 00:04:45,353 --> 00:04:48,088 It's important that everybody Get their tetanus shot. 117 00:04:48,121 --> 00:04:49,323 Right, barn? 118 00:04:49,357 --> 00:04:51,525 Oh, yes, it's Real important. 119 00:04:51,559 --> 00:04:52,826 Yeah, boy. 120 00:04:52,860 --> 00:04:54,094 Well, thank you. 121 00:04:54,127 --> 00:04:57,498 That's real sweet of you To help me out. 122 00:04:57,531 --> 00:05:00,067 Well, andy's Real sweet that way. 123 00:05:00,100 --> 00:05:02,002 Oh, listen, Anything we can do. 124 00:05:02,035 --> 00:05:04,672 Got to get folks To take their shots. 125 00:05:04,705 --> 00:05:06,474 Just anything at all. 126 00:05:06,507 --> 00:05:08,942 I'll drive you up there. 127 00:05:08,976 --> 00:05:10,544 Wonderful. 128 00:05:10,578 --> 00:05:12,780 I've got some things To pick up at the drugstore 129 00:05:12,813 --> 00:05:14,782 So I'll be back here In ten minutes. 130 00:05:14,815 --> 00:05:15,849 Fine. 131 00:05:15,883 --> 00:05:17,851 You're a dear. 132 00:05:25,893 --> 00:05:28,128 That there is a fine girl. 133 00:05:28,161 --> 00:05:29,497 Yes, sir. 134 00:05:29,530 --> 00:05:30,831 That's a fine girl. 135 00:05:30,864 --> 00:05:32,433 Uh-huh. 136 00:05:32,466 --> 00:05:36,103 * for it was mary 137 00:05:36,136 --> 00:05:37,104 * mary... 138 00:05:37,137 --> 00:05:39,106 Yes, sir. A fine girl. 139 00:05:39,139 --> 00:05:41,875 Doing a fine job, Works hard all the time 140 00:05:41,909 --> 00:05:44,111 Tryin' to help folks Stay healthy. 141 00:05:44,144 --> 00:05:45,846 I'll tell you one thing-- 142 00:05:45,879 --> 00:05:48,849 We're lucky to have her, I'll tell you that. 143 00:05:48,882 --> 00:05:51,719 * ...They say marie 144 00:05:51,752 --> 00:05:53,120 * but it was mary... 145 00:05:53,153 --> 00:05:54,688 What are you doing? 146 00:05:54,722 --> 00:05:55,923 Huh? Oh, nothing. 147 00:05:55,956 --> 00:05:57,858 I was just listening To you go on and on 148 00:05:57,891 --> 00:05:58,992 About that fine girl. 149 00:05:59,026 --> 00:06:00,428 Ain't it just fine 150 00:06:00,461 --> 00:06:02,129 That she's got Such a fine sheriff 151 00:06:02,162 --> 00:06:04,064 To help her out With her fine work? 152 00:06:04,097 --> 00:06:05,132 A little sugar-- 153 00:06:05,165 --> 00:06:06,800 That didn't Hurt none, did it? 154 00:06:06,834 --> 00:06:08,402 What are you Talking about? 155 00:06:08,436 --> 00:06:09,937 That little kissy On the jaw-- 156 00:06:09,970 --> 00:06:11,672 That felt kinda good, Didn't it? 157 00:06:11,705 --> 00:06:13,841 It felt better Than a mule's nose. 158 00:06:13,874 --> 00:06:15,576 That's pretty good, Isn't it? 159 00:06:15,609 --> 00:06:18,446 You don't think that's Got anything to do with...? 160 00:06:18,479 --> 00:06:20,748 Oh, no. I just think You wanna help her out 161 00:06:20,781 --> 00:06:21,915 Because you want 162 00:06:21,949 --> 00:06:23,884 To see everybody Stay nice and healthy. 163 00:06:23,917 --> 00:06:25,486 It's good to be healthy. 164 00:06:25,519 --> 00:06:27,020 It's very good To be healthy. 165 00:06:27,054 --> 00:06:28,121 And it's important 166 00:06:28,155 --> 00:06:29,823 That rafe get All them shots 167 00:06:29,857 --> 00:06:31,091 And you oughta help. 168 00:06:31,124 --> 00:06:33,627 The whole department Oughta get in and help. 169 00:06:33,661 --> 00:06:35,896 It's a good thing She ain't campaignin' 170 00:06:35,929 --> 00:06:38,065 For folks to get Their eyes examined. 171 00:06:38,098 --> 00:06:39,199 How's that? 172 00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:40,801 One kiss on your jaw 173 00:06:40,834 --> 00:06:42,670 And we'd all be Wearin' glasses. 174 00:06:42,703 --> 00:06:43,871 Oh, come on, barney. 175 00:06:43,904 --> 00:06:45,906 If she ever kissed you On the mouth 176 00:06:45,939 --> 00:06:48,642 We'd all have to have Our appendix taken out. 177 00:06:48,676 --> 00:06:49,810 You're a nut. 178 00:06:55,215 --> 00:06:56,550 Well, there it is. 179 00:06:58,085 --> 00:07:02,055 Uh...Mary, maybe I'd better Kind of carry the ball. 180 00:07:02,089 --> 00:07:03,691 I mean, with a fellow Like rafe, 181 00:07:03,724 --> 00:07:05,058 You don't just Walk right up 182 00:07:05,092 --> 00:07:06,927 And say, "Let me give you A tetanus shot." 183 00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:08,161 [ chuckling ] 184 00:07:08,195 --> 00:07:10,230 You have to make him Trust you first. 185 00:07:10,263 --> 00:07:11,865 Gain his confidence. 186 00:07:11,899 --> 00:07:14,101 Well, you sneak up on him, Is what you do. 187 00:07:14,134 --> 00:07:15,769 Okay. 188 00:07:15,803 --> 00:07:18,506 Uh, you know, I-I don't know 189 00:07:18,539 --> 00:07:20,941 A whole lot About tetanus. 190 00:07:20,974 --> 00:07:22,776 If I'm gonna help him, Maybe I'd better 191 00:07:22,810 --> 00:07:24,111 Know a little bit More about it. 192 00:07:24,144 --> 00:07:25,913 You really want to know? 193 00:07:25,946 --> 00:07:28,516 Well, I'd better, so as I know What I'm talkin' about. 194 00:07:28,549 --> 00:07:29,850 Well... 195 00:07:29,883 --> 00:07:31,819 The first symptom Is usually stiffness 196 00:07:31,852 --> 00:07:32,986 In the back of the neck. 197 00:07:33,020 --> 00:07:34,522 You see, the muscles are 198 00:07:34,555 --> 00:07:36,724 In a continuous state Of contraction, and -- 199 00:07:36,757 --> 00:07:39,059 You say there's stiffness In the back of the neck? 200 00:07:39,092 --> 00:07:42,029 Yes, now, this muscular Contraction is -- 201 00:07:42,062 --> 00:07:43,597 Whereabouts is that? 202 00:07:43,631 --> 00:07:45,132 In the back of the neck. 203 00:07:45,165 --> 00:07:48,536 Uh, you want to show me, So that I can show rafe? 204 00:07:48,569 --> 00:07:50,971 It's right here. 205 00:07:51,004 --> 00:07:53,006 Right back there, huh? 206 00:07:53,040 --> 00:07:56,977 That's interesting. 207 00:07:57,010 --> 00:08:00,714 Oh, is that Rafe hollister? 208 00:08:02,716 --> 00:08:05,953 Uh, yeah, that's rafe. 209 00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:08,656 Well, you think we'd better Go talk to him? 210 00:08:08,689 --> 00:08:12,192 Um, yeah. 211 00:08:12,225 --> 00:08:13,861 We'd better Go talk to him. 212 00:08:32,079 --> 00:08:34,047 Shoo! Shoo! 213 00:08:34,081 --> 00:08:36,149 Howdy, rafe. 214 00:08:36,183 --> 00:08:38,686 Andy. 215 00:08:38,719 --> 00:08:40,688 Rafe, meet Miss mary simpson, 216 00:08:40,721 --> 00:08:41,922 Our county nurse. 217 00:08:41,955 --> 00:08:43,757 Miss simpson, this here Is rafe hollister. 218 00:08:43,791 --> 00:08:45,025 How do you do, sir? 219 00:08:45,058 --> 00:08:46,126 Nurse, huh? 220 00:08:46,159 --> 00:08:47,995 We don't need any nurse. 221 00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:50,063 Nobody gets sick up here. 222 00:08:50,097 --> 00:08:53,300 There's always that little Bitty chance that they might. 223 00:08:53,333 --> 00:08:54,902 If they was to, 224 00:08:54,935 --> 00:08:57,270 It'd be mighty fine To have miss simpson around. 225 00:08:57,304 --> 00:08:58,806 Don't mean nothing To me. 226 00:08:58,839 --> 00:09:01,008 I ain't never been To the doctor in my life. 227 00:09:01,041 --> 00:09:02,142 Mary: Not ever? 228 00:09:02,175 --> 00:09:04,011 When I was born, I had my mama 229 00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:06,346 And when I die, I'll have the undertaker. 230 00:09:06,379 --> 00:09:09,282 I don't see no sense in Clutterin' things up in between. 231 00:09:09,316 --> 00:09:11,885 Rafe, there ain't no sense In cheatin' yourself 232 00:09:11,919 --> 00:09:13,854 Out of somethin' You might need. 233 00:09:13,887 --> 00:09:15,122 Cheat myself? 234 00:09:15,155 --> 00:09:16,990 Yes, sir. Going Over my records... 235 00:09:17,024 --> 00:09:19,927 Mary, maybe we might just Hold that for just a minute 236 00:09:19,960 --> 00:09:21,995 And show rafe some Of the fine things 237 00:09:22,029 --> 00:09:23,964 The world of medicine's Come up with 238 00:09:23,997 --> 00:09:25,733 He might not Have heard about. 239 00:09:25,766 --> 00:09:27,034 Look here, rafe. 240 00:09:27,067 --> 00:09:29,002 You know what that is? 241 00:09:29,036 --> 00:09:31,639 That's there's A thermometer. 242 00:09:31,672 --> 00:09:35,108 I got one of them On my henhouse, only bigger. 243 00:09:35,142 --> 00:09:37,277 This here's A thermometer for people-- 244 00:09:37,310 --> 00:09:39,613 Lets 'em know When they got a fever. 245 00:09:39,647 --> 00:09:41,114 I know when I got a fever. 246 00:09:41,148 --> 00:09:42,149 I'm hot. 247 00:09:42,182 --> 00:09:43,984 This lets You know how hot. 248 00:09:44,017 --> 00:09:46,253 I know how hot I am When I'm hot-- 249 00:09:46,286 --> 00:09:47,688 Dang hot. 250 00:09:47,721 --> 00:09:50,157 You said you all were Never sick up here. 251 00:09:50,190 --> 00:09:51,692 Balls o' fire. 252 00:09:51,725 --> 00:09:53,160 Being hot ain't sick. 253 00:09:53,193 --> 00:09:55,929 Sooner or later, You're bound to get cold again. 254 00:09:55,963 --> 00:09:57,831 Of course, if you get too cold, You're dead, 255 00:09:57,865 --> 00:10:00,100 But you don't need no Thermometer to tell you that. 256 00:10:00,133 --> 00:10:01,268 Yeah. 257 00:10:01,301 --> 00:10:02,836 Uh, look here, rafe. 258 00:10:02,870 --> 00:10:04,404 Here's some other stuff. 259 00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:06,006 Oh, here's somethin'. 260 00:10:06,039 --> 00:10:07,274 Know what that is? 261 00:10:07,307 --> 00:10:08,275 No. 262 00:10:08,308 --> 00:10:09,743 That's a stethoscope. 263 00:10:09,777 --> 00:10:11,111 You know what it does? 264 00:10:11,144 --> 00:10:12,145 No. 265 00:10:12,179 --> 00:10:13,847 Lets you hear Your heart beat. 266 00:10:13,881 --> 00:10:15,248 Wanna hear Your heart beat? 267 00:10:15,282 --> 00:10:16,750 I know my Heart's beatin'. 268 00:10:16,784 --> 00:10:17,885 Well, yeah... 269 00:10:17,918 --> 00:10:19,219 I'm alive, ain't I? 270 00:10:19,252 --> 00:10:20,287 Well, yeah. 271 00:10:20,320 --> 00:10:22,122 Well, then my Heart's beatin'. 272 00:10:22,155 --> 00:10:23,991 Well, listen To it beat, rafe. 273 00:10:24,024 --> 00:10:26,259 Put these two ends In your ear there. 274 00:10:26,293 --> 00:10:27,961 Stick 'em right in there. 275 00:10:27,995 --> 00:10:29,296 They won't hurt you. 276 00:10:29,329 --> 00:10:30,831 Now, listen, listen. 277 00:10:30,864 --> 00:10:32,299 Huh? How 'bout that? 278 00:10:32,332 --> 00:10:33,767 Listen to mine. 279 00:10:33,801 --> 00:10:34,835 Huh? 280 00:10:34,868 --> 00:10:37,037 What do you think Of that, rafe? 281 00:10:37,070 --> 00:10:39,973 All right, now we know We're both alive. 282 00:10:40,007 --> 00:10:41,408 Yeah. 283 00:10:41,441 --> 00:10:43,043 Uh, rafe, 284 00:10:43,076 --> 00:10:46,880 Miss simpson's got one Other thing to show you here. 285 00:10:46,914 --> 00:10:49,049 You know what that is? 286 00:10:49,082 --> 00:10:51,819 Looks like somethin' For siphonin' cider. 287 00:10:51,852 --> 00:10:53,754 Yes. Now, this Won't hurt a bit 288 00:10:53,787 --> 00:10:55,723 And it'll be Real good for you. 289 00:10:55,756 --> 00:10:57,190 Just roll up your sleeve. 290 00:10:57,224 --> 00:10:59,459 You ain't gonna Stick that in me. 291 00:10:59,492 --> 00:11:01,461 You've never had A tetanus shot. 292 00:11:01,494 --> 00:11:04,197 Young lady, you Can put that thing Away right now. 293 00:11:04,231 --> 00:11:05,833 I ain't never Been jabbed 294 00:11:05,866 --> 00:11:07,300 And I ain't Fixin' to be. 295 00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:08,769 Goodbye. 296 00:11:08,802 --> 00:11:10,037 And take these. 297 00:11:10,070 --> 00:11:12,973 I've heard all I wanna hear. 298 00:11:21,048 --> 00:11:23,283 Every time I think About that stubborn 299 00:11:23,316 --> 00:11:25,352 Mountain attitude Toward medicine 300 00:11:25,385 --> 00:11:26,920 I could just Kick something. 301 00:11:26,954 --> 00:11:29,456 Now, mary, If you frown like that 302 00:11:29,489 --> 00:11:31,691 Your face is liable To grow that way. 303 00:11:34,227 --> 00:11:35,863 Oh, it wouldn't be so bad 304 00:11:35,896 --> 00:11:38,732 If I hadn't gone out On a limb the way I did. 305 00:11:38,766 --> 00:11:40,367 But I promised my supervisor 306 00:11:40,400 --> 00:11:44,137 That I'd get a hundred percent Cooperation on those shots. 307 00:11:44,171 --> 00:11:46,306 I sure am gonna Look like a fool. 308 00:11:46,339 --> 00:11:48,475 Well, we ain't Gonna give up yet. 309 00:11:48,508 --> 00:11:49,843 Just be patient. 310 00:11:49,877 --> 00:11:50,944 I promise... 311 00:11:50,978 --> 00:11:52,946 ( telephone rings ) 312 00:11:52,980 --> 00:11:54,047 Excuse me. 313 00:11:56,850 --> 00:11:59,452 Sheriff taylor speaking. 314 00:12:01,354 --> 00:12:03,056 I'll be right there. 315 00:12:05,859 --> 00:12:07,895 I have to go up To the mayor's office. 316 00:12:07,928 --> 00:12:09,830 If you'll wait, I'll come right back. 317 00:12:09,863 --> 00:12:10,998 Okay. 318 00:12:13,133 --> 00:12:15,936 ( door closing ) 319 00:12:15,969 --> 00:12:17,337 What happened? 320 00:12:17,370 --> 00:12:20,340 Rafe hollister Turn you down, did he? 321 00:12:20,373 --> 00:12:23,110 Want me to take you Back up there? 322 00:12:23,143 --> 00:12:24,477 What? 323 00:12:24,511 --> 00:12:27,014 Up to rafe hollister's To give him his shot? 324 00:12:27,047 --> 00:12:30,150 Oh, barney, if andy Couldn't do anything with him... 325 00:12:30,183 --> 00:12:32,986 And you know why andy Couldn't do anything with him? 326 00:12:33,020 --> 00:12:34,254 Because andy's too soft. 327 00:12:34,287 --> 00:12:36,189 Now, rafe hollister's Like a child 328 00:12:36,223 --> 00:12:38,158 And he's got to be treated Like one. 329 00:12:38,191 --> 00:12:41,061 You don't beg a child To do something, you tell him. 330 00:12:41,094 --> 00:12:42,262 Come on, let's go. 331 00:12:42,295 --> 00:12:44,131 Barney, you really think...? 332 00:12:44,164 --> 00:12:45,265 Come on! 333 00:12:45,298 --> 00:12:46,266 Are you sure? 334 00:12:46,299 --> 00:12:47,367 Sure, I'm sure. 335 00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:48,936 I'll make him take his shot. 336 00:12:48,969 --> 00:12:51,571 Just don't do anything To get rafe hollister angry. 337 00:12:51,604 --> 00:12:53,106 Don't you worry about it. 338 00:12:53,140 --> 00:12:54,307 Come on, let's go. 339 00:13:13,160 --> 00:13:15,395 Now, you just leave Everything to me, mary. 340 00:13:15,428 --> 00:13:17,797 I'll handle this baby. 341 00:13:25,438 --> 00:13:27,407 Rafe? 342 00:13:27,440 --> 00:13:29,409 Rafe hollister. 343 00:13:29,442 --> 00:13:31,311 Deputy fife here. 344 00:13:31,344 --> 00:13:32,445 Come on out. 345 00:13:32,479 --> 00:13:33,981 What you want, barney? 346 00:13:34,014 --> 00:13:36,183 And what's that nurse Doin' back here? 347 00:13:36,216 --> 00:13:38,285 She came out here To give you your shot. 348 00:13:38,318 --> 00:13:39,552 Stop acting like a child 349 00:13:39,586 --> 00:13:41,221 And come out here And get it. 350 00:13:41,254 --> 00:13:42,990 What?! You heard me. 351 00:13:43,023 --> 00:13:46,359 Here! Right now! 352 00:13:46,393 --> 00:13:48,095 All right, I'm gonna give you 353 00:13:48,128 --> 00:13:49,496 Exactly three to get out here. 354 00:13:49,529 --> 00:13:50,597 One... 355 00:13:50,630 --> 00:13:52,632 Two... 356 00:13:52,665 --> 00:13:53,967 Three. 357 00:13:54,001 --> 00:13:56,336 And I'll give you exactly three 358 00:13:56,369 --> 00:13:57,604 To get off of my property. 359 00:13:57,637 --> 00:13:58,939 Now see here, rafe... 360 00:13:58,972 --> 00:14:00,073 One... 361 00:14:00,107 --> 00:14:01,374 Two... 362 00:14:03,911 --> 00:14:07,014 Durn fool, he don't even know How to count to three. 363 00:14:07,047 --> 00:14:09,282 Barney, he shot at you. 364 00:14:09,316 --> 00:14:10,417 That's all right. 365 00:14:10,450 --> 00:14:12,285 I just wanted to Get you to safety. 366 00:14:12,319 --> 00:14:13,987 All right, I'll Be back, rafe! 367 00:14:14,021 --> 00:14:15,355 You're in trouble, fella-- 368 00:14:15,388 --> 00:14:16,489 Big trouble! 369 00:14:16,523 --> 00:14:18,992 Okay, buddy, you Just threw away 370 00:14:19,026 --> 00:14:21,294 Any chance you Had for leniency. 371 00:14:28,568 --> 00:14:31,504 You're in trouble Is what you are! 372 00:14:31,538 --> 00:14:32,872 Big trouble! 373 00:14:40,580 --> 00:14:42,582 I'm so sorry, andy, It was all my fault. 374 00:14:42,615 --> 00:14:44,985 I shouldn't have agreed To go back up there. 375 00:14:45,018 --> 00:14:47,955 And I couldn't take a chance On rafe gettin' hurt. 376 00:14:47,988 --> 00:14:49,589 I mean, I figured It was better 377 00:14:49,622 --> 00:14:52,926 If me and you went up later And took him in one piece. 378 00:14:52,960 --> 00:14:55,062 And we're goin' to Have to take him... 379 00:14:55,095 --> 00:14:56,296 Me and you. 380 00:14:56,329 --> 00:14:58,198 We can't have rafe Shootin' at people. 381 00:14:58,231 --> 00:14:59,332 Let's go get him. 382 00:14:59,366 --> 00:15:01,234 I better get my Bullet and load up. 383 00:15:01,268 --> 00:15:02,535 That won't be necessary. 384 00:15:02,569 --> 00:15:04,471 But, andy, he's a Mad dog, a killer! 385 00:15:04,504 --> 00:15:06,573 Well, now, Don't make rafe 386 00:15:06,606 --> 00:15:08,175 Out to be a monster. 387 00:15:08,208 --> 00:15:10,477 I'm sure we'll bring him in Without any trouble. 388 00:15:10,510 --> 00:15:11,979 I'll go get The car ready. 389 00:15:12,012 --> 00:15:13,446 We better get Right up there. 390 00:15:13,480 --> 00:15:15,048 Okay. 391 00:15:15,082 --> 00:15:17,417 Aren't you even going To take a gun? 392 00:15:17,450 --> 00:15:20,453 Well, no, I don't figure On doin' any shootin'. 393 00:15:20,487 --> 00:15:23,056 Don't you get hurt up there. 394 00:15:23,090 --> 00:15:25,358 I won't. 395 00:15:25,392 --> 00:15:27,594 Be back after awhile. 396 00:15:44,144 --> 00:15:45,345 Be careful, andy. 397 00:15:45,378 --> 00:15:47,114 You're a sitting... 398 00:15:47,147 --> 00:15:50,083 See?! He's a mad dog! 399 00:15:50,117 --> 00:15:51,384 Stay back, andy. 400 00:15:51,418 --> 00:15:53,153 Don't use that tone of voice 401 00:15:53,186 --> 00:15:54,487 To me, rafe hollister, 402 00:15:54,521 --> 00:15:55,989 And put that gun down!A 403 00:15:56,023 --> 00:15:57,991 Don't come no closer, andy. 404 00:15:58,025 --> 00:15:59,126 I'll shoot! 405 00:15:59,159 --> 00:16:00,127 I mean it! 406 00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:01,394 Now, andy... 407 00:16:01,428 --> 00:16:04,397 Aren't you ashamed Of yourself? 408 00:16:04,431 --> 00:16:07,167 Well, dog-gone it, andy, What'd you expect me to do? 409 00:16:07,200 --> 00:16:08,601 Just let you Come and take me? 410 00:16:08,635 --> 00:16:10,270 I told you To stay out of here. 411 00:16:10,303 --> 00:16:12,272 Rafe, I'm gonna Have to arrest you. 412 00:16:12,305 --> 00:16:13,673 You been shootin' At people. 413 00:16:13,706 --> 00:16:15,408 You know that's Against the law. 414 00:16:15,442 --> 00:16:17,044 Give himself up, did he? 415 00:16:17,077 --> 00:16:19,412 I figured he would once he seen He was overpowered. 416 00:16:19,446 --> 00:16:22,082 Who do you think you're Playin' with-- the boy scouts? 417 00:16:22,115 --> 00:16:23,250 Come on, move. Move! 418 00:16:33,060 --> 00:16:34,694 Andy, you keep her away from me. 419 00:16:34,727 --> 00:16:36,163 Easy, now, rafe. 420 00:16:36,196 --> 00:16:38,331 Ain't nobody goin' to make you Take a shot 421 00:16:38,365 --> 00:16:39,366 Against your will. 422 00:16:39,399 --> 00:16:41,368 Of course not, but... 423 00:16:41,401 --> 00:16:43,803 If I could Just make you understand 424 00:16:43,836 --> 00:16:45,538 How important this is. 425 00:16:45,572 --> 00:16:48,675 Not to me, but to yourself And your family 426 00:16:48,708 --> 00:16:50,410 And to your friends. 427 00:16:50,443 --> 00:16:53,246 Why, this could save Your life one day, 428 00:16:53,280 --> 00:16:54,814 Or one Of your children. 429 00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:57,084 If you don't want to think About yourself, 430 00:16:57,117 --> 00:16:58,251 You think about them. 431 00:16:58,285 --> 00:17:00,187 I done all right Afore you come around 432 00:17:00,220 --> 00:17:01,621 And I'm doin' all right now. 433 00:17:01,654 --> 00:17:03,423 I'm tellin' you For the last time 434 00:17:03,456 --> 00:17:05,358 I ain't takin' no shots! 435 00:17:09,329 --> 00:17:11,098 He sure is hardheaded. 436 00:17:11,131 --> 00:17:13,666 Now-now, you remember What I said. 437 00:17:13,700 --> 00:17:15,402 I-if you frown like that 438 00:17:15,435 --> 00:17:17,670 Your face is liable To grow to it. 439 00:17:17,704 --> 00:17:20,540 See? Yeah, a little... A little bit more. 440 00:17:20,573 --> 00:17:22,542 That's right. 441 00:17:22,575 --> 00:17:24,544 That's a whole lot better. 442 00:17:24,577 --> 00:17:26,546 Now, we won't give up yet. 443 00:17:26,579 --> 00:17:28,548 No. We won't Give up a bit. 444 00:17:28,581 --> 00:17:30,283 I'll talk to ya After awhile. 445 00:17:30,317 --> 00:17:31,484 All right. 446 00:17:34,621 --> 00:17:37,757 Hey, how 'bout that coffee? 447 00:17:37,790 --> 00:17:42,095 Comin' right up, rafe. 448 00:17:42,129 --> 00:17:44,497 Ain't nothin' like a Good, hot cup of coffee 449 00:17:44,531 --> 00:17:46,599 To straighten a Fella out, is there? 450 00:17:46,633 --> 00:17:47,734 ( chuckles ) 451 00:17:47,767 --> 00:17:49,736 Yeah, boy. 452 00:17:49,769 --> 00:17:51,204 Help yourself. 453 00:17:51,238 --> 00:17:52,605 Thank you. 454 00:17:52,639 --> 00:17:54,807 Yeah. 455 00:18:00,380 --> 00:18:03,216 You make good coffee, andy. 456 00:18:03,250 --> 00:18:05,218 Much obliged, rafe. 457 00:18:05,252 --> 00:18:07,620 You make good sense. 458 00:18:07,654 --> 00:18:08,888 Huh? 459 00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:11,324 Not lettin' that nurse Give you that shot. 460 00:18:11,358 --> 00:18:13,493 I can see now where You was 100% right. 461 00:18:13,526 --> 00:18:14,627 You can? 462 00:18:14,661 --> 00:18:17,330 Oh, yeah, yeah. 463 00:18:17,364 --> 00:18:19,332 I understand now Why you're doin' it. 464 00:18:19,366 --> 00:18:20,733 You do? Yeah. 465 00:18:20,767 --> 00:18:22,869 If you was to let her Give you that shot 466 00:18:22,902 --> 00:18:25,872 See, you'd be passin' up Your chance for immortality. 467 00:18:25,905 --> 00:18:28,475 You dang right, I would. 468 00:18:28,508 --> 00:18:30,543 What's that mean? 469 00:18:30,577 --> 00:18:32,279 "Immortality"? 470 00:18:32,312 --> 00:18:33,613 Well, that means 471 00:18:33,646 --> 00:18:36,249 Bein' famous like columbus Or george washington 472 00:18:36,283 --> 00:18:37,517 Or some of them. 473 00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:38,585 Huh? 474 00:18:38,618 --> 00:18:40,253 Oh, well, see, They was famous. 475 00:18:40,287 --> 00:18:42,455 They was famous for, For doin' great deeds 476 00:18:42,489 --> 00:18:46,159 And that's what You'll be, too. Yeah. 477 00:18:47,294 --> 00:18:48,895 After you're dead. 478 00:18:48,928 --> 00:18:51,931 After I'm dead?! 479 00:18:51,964 --> 00:18:54,367 Yeah. How it'll happen probably 480 00:18:54,401 --> 00:18:57,770 One day you'll-you'll Get, uh, cut by a rusty saw 481 00:18:57,804 --> 00:19:01,274 Or a animal will bite ya, Or somethin' like that 482 00:19:01,308 --> 00:19:05,345 And not havin' the shot, Well, you'll be a cinch to go... 483 00:19:05,378 --> 00:19:06,779 Just like that. 484 00:19:06,813 --> 00:19:07,814 I will? 485 00:19:07,847 --> 00:19:08,948 Oh, yeah, yeah. 486 00:19:08,981 --> 00:19:10,917 That's where the Great deed comes in. 487 00:19:10,950 --> 00:19:14,554 See, by dyin', it'll serve As a lesson to the others 488 00:19:14,587 --> 00:19:16,856 Not to neglect their shots. 489 00:19:16,889 --> 00:19:18,258 It will? 490 00:19:18,291 --> 00:19:19,659 Oh, yeah, Got to, got to. 491 00:19:19,692 --> 00:19:21,661 I can just see them neighbors 492 00:19:21,694 --> 00:19:23,830 And kinfolks of yours right now. 493 00:19:23,863 --> 00:19:25,965 They'll be sayin'... They'll say 494 00:19:25,998 --> 00:19:28,535 "Did you hear What happened to rafe? 495 00:19:28,568 --> 00:19:30,403 "Poor soul, He cut hisself 496 00:19:30,437 --> 00:19:32,305 "And went just Like that... 497 00:19:32,339 --> 00:19:33,573 ( snaps fingers ) 498 00:19:33,606 --> 00:19:36,676 ...Moanin' and groanin' And sufferin'." 499 00:19:36,709 --> 00:19:38,945 They'll say, "It ain't Gonna happen to me. 500 00:19:38,978 --> 00:19:41,381 "I'm goin' down there At that county nurse 501 00:19:41,414 --> 00:19:43,416 And get me that good shot Right now!" 502 00:19:43,450 --> 00:19:44,684 Now, wait a minute... 503 00:19:44,717 --> 00:19:46,386 And the funeral You'll have. 504 00:19:46,419 --> 00:19:47,520 Funeral? 505 00:19:47,554 --> 00:19:48,988 Oh, yeah. 506 00:19:49,021 --> 00:19:51,291 It'll be the biggest thing Mayberry's ever seen. 507 00:19:51,324 --> 00:19:54,561 Oh, yes, they'll be talks 508 00:19:54,594 --> 00:19:57,964 And eulogies... 509 00:19:57,997 --> 00:19:59,832 And while the folks Are filin' by, 510 00:19:59,866 --> 00:20:02,302 Payin' their last respects... 511 00:20:02,335 --> 00:20:04,271 Lookin' down at ya... 512 00:20:07,607 --> 00:20:11,478 ...If I ain't too broke up, 513 00:20:11,511 --> 00:20:14,314 I might sing a Song over ya-- 514 00:20:14,347 --> 00:20:16,649 A song just for you. 515 00:20:25,625 --> 00:20:27,927 ( strums minor chord ) 516 00:20:30,029 --> 00:20:35,368 * dig my grave 517 00:20:35,402 --> 00:20:41,007 * with a silver spade 518 00:20:41,040 --> 00:20:48,481 * dig my grave wide and deep 519 00:20:48,515 --> 00:20:56,889 * dig my grave With a silver spade * 520 00:20:56,923 --> 00:21:03,262 * bury me 'neath the willer tree * 521 00:21:06,533 --> 00:21:13,306 * place my grave On a snow-white hill * 522 00:21:13,340 --> 00:21:18,044 * cover me over with sod 523 00:21:18,077 --> 00:21:27,720 * tell 'em I died To save 'em all * 524 00:21:27,754 --> 00:21:35,628 * tell my wife to marry again. 525 00:21:37,464 --> 00:21:39,699 Don't that clutch ya? 526 00:21:43,836 --> 00:21:46,105 And later, after the funeral, 527 00:21:46,138 --> 00:21:49,442 They might even put a statue Up to ya 528 00:21:49,476 --> 00:21:50,977 Down at the Town square-- 529 00:21:51,010 --> 00:21:56,082 A figure of you slumping As you breathe your last. 530 00:21:56,115 --> 00:22:00,086 At the unveilin' Ceremonies 531 00:22:00,119 --> 00:22:03,122 I might sing that song To ya again. 532 00:22:03,155 --> 00:22:06,693 Too bad you won't be there To enjoy it. 533 00:22:06,726 --> 00:22:08,828 ( strums minor chord ) 534 00:22:08,861 --> 00:22:09,962 Just a minute! 535 00:22:09,996 --> 00:22:11,097 Just a minute! 536 00:22:11,130 --> 00:22:12,098 Wait a minute. 537 00:22:12,131 --> 00:22:13,132 What? 538 00:22:13,165 --> 00:22:14,701 Andy, I don't want to die. 539 00:22:14,734 --> 00:22:16,503 But-but you'll Be a dead hero. 540 00:22:16,536 --> 00:22:18,638 I don't want to be A dead hero. 541 00:22:18,671 --> 00:22:20,440 I want to be a live me. 542 00:22:20,473 --> 00:22:24,143 Well, rafe, maybe I had you Figured wrong when you refused 543 00:22:24,176 --> 00:22:25,445 To take the shot. 544 00:22:25,478 --> 00:22:26,846 Who won't take the shot? 545 00:22:26,879 --> 00:22:28,114 I'll take the shot. 546 00:22:28,147 --> 00:22:30,116 Just you go fetch That county nurse. 547 00:22:30,149 --> 00:22:31,818 Well, rafe, Are you sure? 548 00:22:31,851 --> 00:22:33,586 She's gonna jab ya. 549 00:22:33,620 --> 00:22:34,587 I don't care. 550 00:22:34,621 --> 00:22:35,855 My daddy lived to be 100 551 00:22:35,888 --> 00:22:37,990 And I don't aim To break the tradition. 552 00:22:38,024 --> 00:22:41,594 Well, all right. 553 00:22:41,628 --> 00:22:44,464 Too bad, though... 554 00:22:44,497 --> 00:22:47,099 You'd a made a fine statue. 555 00:22:54,574 --> 00:22:57,410 There we are. 556 00:22:57,444 --> 00:22:58,745 That all? 557 00:22:58,778 --> 00:22:59,946 That's all There is to it. 558 00:22:59,979 --> 00:23:01,448 Well, that Wasn't so bad. 559 00:23:01,481 --> 00:23:02,715 Well, of course not. 560 00:23:02,749 --> 00:23:04,417 Here, I'll rub off The alcohol for you. 561 00:23:04,451 --> 00:23:05,818 No, no. Leave it there. 562 00:23:05,852 --> 00:23:08,187 I like the smell. 563 00:23:08,220 --> 00:23:09,956 ( chuckles ) 564 00:23:09,989 --> 00:23:11,891 I can't tell you How delighted I am. 565 00:23:11,924 --> 00:23:13,426 I just hope now 566 00:23:13,460 --> 00:23:15,528 I can get all the others Up in your district. 567 00:23:15,562 --> 00:23:17,597 Well, little lady, You just come on up. 568 00:23:17,630 --> 00:23:19,165 I'll have 'em All ready for ya. 569 00:23:19,198 --> 00:23:20,967 Oh, that's wonderful. 570 00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:23,570 Well, I'll just Check off your name now. 571 00:23:23,603 --> 00:23:25,738 You spell it With two "L"S, right? 572 00:23:25,772 --> 00:23:27,206 You've done a Fine thing, rafe. 573 00:23:27,239 --> 00:23:28,608 You ought To feel proud. 574 00:23:28,641 --> 00:23:30,076 I do! 575 00:23:30,109 --> 00:23:32,144 Barney: you ought to feel A little ashamed, too. 576 00:23:32,178 --> 00:23:33,813 A grown-up Makin' such a to-do 577 00:23:33,846 --> 00:23:35,582 Over a little thing Like a shot. 578 00:23:35,615 --> 00:23:38,651 Sometimes it's the big ones That make the worst babies. 579 00:23:38,685 --> 00:23:40,687 Well, I'm glad I caught this. 580 00:23:40,720 --> 00:23:41,988 Caught what? 581 00:23:42,021 --> 00:23:43,756 Well, it's your name, barney. 582 00:23:43,790 --> 00:23:45,625 What about my name? 583 00:23:45,658 --> 00:23:47,960 Well, it isn't checked off. 584 00:23:47,994 --> 00:23:49,829 You haven't had Your tetanus shot. 585 00:23:49,862 --> 00:23:50,930 What? 586 00:23:50,963 --> 00:23:52,231 Why, we might as well 587 00:23:52,264 --> 00:23:54,133 Get it over with right now. 588 00:23:54,166 --> 00:23:55,702 Roll up your sleeve. 589 00:23:55,735 --> 00:23:57,537 Oh, well, now, Wait a minute! 590 00:23:57,570 --> 00:23:59,972 How do you know It hasn't been checked off? 591 00:24:00,006 --> 00:24:01,941 Maybe there's been Some mistake. 592 00:24:01,974 --> 00:24:03,543 Oh, there's no mistake. 593 00:24:03,576 --> 00:24:05,478 But maybe the ink faded Or something. 594 00:24:05,512 --> 00:24:06,546 The ink faded? 595 00:24:06,579 --> 00:24:07,880 Well, sure. 596 00:24:07,914 --> 00:24:10,249 We ought not to rush Into a thing like this. 597 00:24:10,282 --> 00:24:12,752 You ought to investigate it And make sure. 598 00:24:12,785 --> 00:24:14,754 We're sure, We're sure. 599 00:24:14,787 --> 00:24:15,955 Come on, mary. 600 00:24:17,056 --> 00:24:18,491 ( sighs ) 601 00:24:18,525 --> 00:24:20,026 Thank heavens that's over. 602 00:24:20,059 --> 00:24:22,028 Barney, that was Just the alcohol. 603 00:24:22,061 --> 00:24:24,964 That was just the wha...? 40221

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