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1
00:00:00,665 --> 00:00:03,582
(mysterious music)
2
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(door slams)
3
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(paper rips)
4
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Fart licker.
5
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Do you like this, huh?
6
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I bet you swallow.
7
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Swallow this.
8
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(Ryker hacks and spits)
9
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Now eat it.
10
00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:34,343
Well now, here we are, again.
11
00:01:35,210 --> 00:01:37,060
It's the last day of school, boys.
12
00:01:37,060 --> 00:01:38,900
I'm not into this.
13
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What, you gotta have one last huzzah before the holiday?
14
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Interrupt my work?
15
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All my work that I have, lots of work.
16
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I have a lot of things that I have to do here, okay?
17
00:01:49,660 --> 00:01:53,160
Now I don't suppose there's an Elia Kazan
18
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amongst the two of you to make this an easy trial.
19
00:01:55,130 --> 00:01:57,983
So I'll just have to surmise what happened.
20
00:01:58,840 --> 00:02:02,300
Ryker, you know fighting hurts your hands.
21
00:02:02,300 --> 00:02:04,380
You know, and you're a soccer star.
22
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So think about that.
23
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Future, right?
24
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Can't do it.
25
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And Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh, ugh.
26
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I don't know, I'm feeling metaphysical about you.
27
00:02:16,940 --> 00:02:19,100
I just feel like you have so much negative energy.
28
00:02:19,100 --> 00:02:20,720
It's just swilling around you.
29
00:02:20,720 --> 00:02:25,720
Just your, your chakras are just awful. (sighs)
30
00:02:26,640 --> 00:02:29,020
Buddy, you are stirring that kind of pot,
31
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Humboldt sticky green bud.
32
00:02:31,630 --> 00:02:32,700
Like nobody's business.
33
00:02:32,700 --> 00:02:33,900
But he was the one chasing me.
34
00:02:33,900 --> 00:02:36,750
Uh, nobody likes a tattle-tale!
35
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Okay?
36
00:02:37,583 --> 00:02:39,410
You gotta learn how to stand up for yourself.
37
00:02:39,410 --> 00:02:40,460
Okay?
38
00:02:40,460 --> 00:02:42,290
You gotta learn how to do that.
39
00:02:42,290 --> 00:02:44,630
Speaking of standing up, Caitlyn, I see you.
40
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Please get up.
41
00:02:48,220 --> 00:02:49,670
I thought we agreed not to see each other
42
00:02:49,670 --> 00:02:52,520
after your disturbing performance in Fiddler on the Roof.
43
00:02:52,520 --> 00:02:54,620
But Principal Browning, the swim team
44
00:02:54,620 --> 00:02:56,073
is waxing their legs again.
45
00:02:57,460 --> 00:03:00,393
Oh right, they will need supervision.
46
00:03:01,400 --> 00:03:02,233
Okay.
47
00:03:03,380 --> 00:03:06,880
Uh, Caitlyn, untie Ryker's shoelaces.
48
00:03:06,880 --> 00:03:08,590
This is not "Saved by the Bell."
49
00:03:08,590 --> 00:03:09,963
I mean, gimme a break.
50
00:03:10,840 --> 00:03:11,723
That's it!
51
00:03:13,330 --> 00:03:17,040
Nell Carter.
52
00:03:17,040 --> 00:03:19,960
Oh God, she was great, right? (laughs)
53
00:03:19,960 --> 00:03:21,300
Remember the '80s?
54
00:03:21,300 --> 00:03:23,450
She swung her purse around.
55
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She just sucked up the aquarium into her vacuum
56
00:03:26,300 --> 00:03:27,800
and she's like, what happened?
57
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Oh, Nell.
58
00:03:30,880 --> 00:03:32,503
I would've loved to see her in Annie.
59
00:03:40,676 --> 00:03:43,343
(fist knocking)
60
00:03:44,340 --> 00:03:46,160
Hey, Josh.
61
00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:47,840
Hey buddy, it's Dad.
62
00:03:47,840 --> 00:03:50,010
Hey, just wanted to see if you wanted to talk about,
63
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you know, anything that you wanted to talk about.
64
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This is me respecting your privacy and not busting in, okay?
65
00:03:58,637 --> 00:04:02,139
I mean, 'cause whenever happened last time, for the record,
66
00:04:02,139 --> 00:04:03,390
I just wanted to let you know that
67
00:04:03,390 --> 00:04:05,630
you can keep the turkey baster.
68
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'Cause I don't think Mom and I are
69
00:04:08,110 --> 00:04:10,450
gonna ever use that again, ever.
70
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So you keep that, okay?
71
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It's funny, 'cause mom and I used to have a Hoover vac.
72
00:04:16,210 --> 00:04:17,900
Okay, hey, if you wanna talk about anything,
73
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or you don't wanna talk about anything
74
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that happened at school, totally fine.
75
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Just make sure to keep the door locked this time, okay?
76
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Okay, I love you.
77
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(peppy music)
78
00:04:46,150 --> 00:04:46,983
Josh!
79
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Here, hold this.
80
00:04:49,439 --> 00:04:51,923
Who's this?
Oh, that's just Clark.
81
00:05:00,530 --> 00:05:02,300
Clark and I met at day camp.
82
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He's at Kenner Prep.
83
00:05:04,600 --> 00:05:05,433
He's rich.
84
00:05:07,060 --> 00:05:09,293
Clark, don't eat all the popcorn.
85
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(menacing music)
86
00:05:15,690 --> 00:05:17,943
I seriously think you're helpless without me!
87
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Helpless!
88
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I have been waiting for you.
89
00:05:51,170 --> 00:05:52,657
Me?
90
00:05:52,657 --> 00:05:53,907
Mm, yes, yes.
91
00:05:56,350 --> 00:05:58,420
Quite a long time.
92
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I have to go find my friends.
93
00:06:00,470 --> 00:06:01,940
No.
94
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Young man, you have no friends.
95
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Yes.
96
00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:15,847
Now, I know I can help you.
97
00:06:17,020 --> 00:06:19,000
How much does this cost?
98
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I want you to close your eyes.
99
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Good.
100
00:06:24,800 --> 00:06:27,137
Breathe in, breathe out.
101
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Oh what a good boy.
102
00:06:31,120 --> 00:06:32,703
Think about something you like.
103
00:06:33,570 --> 00:06:34,593
Open your heart.
104
00:06:35,460 --> 00:06:40,460
Yes, you must be willing to give your heart a chance, hm.
105
00:06:41,490 --> 00:06:42,743
Do not be afraid.
106
00:06:44,930 --> 00:06:47,167
That is not going to work for you.
107
00:06:48,680 --> 00:06:50,023
Let it go.
108
00:06:53,980 --> 00:06:55,633
You can open your eyes now.
109
00:06:58,170 --> 00:07:02,213
This will make all of your problems disappear.
110
00:07:03,560 --> 00:07:04,393
Ooh.
111
00:07:06,130 --> 00:07:07,427
This will work.
112
00:07:12,276 --> 00:07:13,713
Mm, 10 bucks.
113
00:07:20,897 --> 00:07:23,814
(mysterious music)
114
00:07:28,310 --> 00:07:29,243
Fine print?
115
00:07:30,310 --> 00:07:32,050
Congratulations, after drinking this
116
00:07:32,050 --> 00:07:33,850
you will disappear in 24 hours
117
00:07:33,850 --> 00:07:36,070
unless you experience true love's kiss.
118
00:07:36,070 --> 00:07:37,070
Good luck with that.
119
00:07:42,034 --> 00:07:44,617
(wind blowing)
120
00:07:51,670 --> 00:07:53,560
You didn't even read it?
121
00:07:53,560 --> 00:07:56,020
There was no warning, nothing.
122
00:07:56,020 --> 00:07:56,853
And look.
123
00:07:58,980 --> 00:08:01,363
It says right here, you will disappear.
124
00:08:02,390 --> 00:08:03,870
It's pretty clear.
125
00:08:03,870 --> 00:08:05,150
What am I gonna do?
126
00:08:05,150 --> 00:08:07,823
Well, I guess you're just gonna have to kiss around a bit.
127
00:08:09,610 --> 00:08:10,590
What?
128
00:08:10,590 --> 00:08:11,560
Oh no you don't.
129
00:08:11,560 --> 00:08:13,530
Come on Caitlyn, just one kiss.
130
00:08:13,530 --> 00:08:14,363
It'll be quick.
131
00:08:14,363 --> 00:08:15,600
Ew, gross.
132
00:08:15,600 --> 00:08:17,400
Pretend I'm Zac Efron.
133
00:08:17,400 --> 00:08:18,650
You don't know my life.
134
00:08:19,510 --> 00:08:21,150
Gosh, Cait.
135
00:08:21,150 --> 00:08:25,010
I understand, I guess you'll never like me like that.
136
00:08:25,010 --> 00:08:26,480
Not like I like you.
137
00:08:26,480 --> 00:08:27,870
You do?
138
00:08:27,870 --> 00:08:28,710
Like forever.
139
00:08:28,710 --> 00:08:30,260
You're just the prettiest and the tannest girl
140
00:08:30,260 --> 00:08:32,893
in the entire school, and you're usually nice.
141
00:08:33,991 --> 00:08:34,824
I am?
142
00:08:35,780 --> 00:08:37,971
I bet your lips aren't sticky like Regina Callie's.
143
00:08:37,971 --> 00:08:38,924
Regina Callie?
144
00:08:38,924 --> 00:08:39,757
Shh.
145
00:08:40,867 --> 00:08:44,120
(gentle music)
146
00:08:44,120 --> 00:08:46,030
Caitlyn, you and Josh can make yourself some sandwiches--
147
00:08:46,030 --> 00:08:48,570
Oh my God!
148
00:08:48,570 --> 00:08:50,740
Do you know what happens to fast little girls?
149
00:08:50,740 --> 00:08:52,490
They grow up and become hookers.
150
00:08:52,490 --> 00:08:56,353
My God, I can't let you out of my eyesight!
151
00:08:56,353 --> 00:08:57,680
I'm gonna gain weight.
152
00:08:57,680 --> 00:08:59,445
Do you know what you're doing to me?
153
00:08:59,445 --> 00:09:00,278
Oh no.
154
00:09:02,568 --> 00:09:05,151
(upbeat music)
155
00:09:27,968 --> 00:09:30,480
Oh my God, I'm screwed.
156
00:09:30,480 --> 00:09:32,713
Good grief, do I have to come up with everything?
157
00:09:33,756 --> 00:09:35,410
Get your tickets.
158
00:09:35,410 --> 00:09:37,380
Get your kissing booth tickets.
159
00:09:37,380 --> 00:09:39,091
Support ugly orphan babies.
160
00:09:39,091 --> 00:09:41,231
Hurry up, get your tickets.
161
00:09:41,231 --> 00:09:43,731
(peppy music)
162
00:09:54,140 --> 00:09:55,840
Maybe you should change your hair.
163
00:09:58,280 --> 00:09:59,213
It'll be okay.
164
00:10:01,267 --> 00:10:02,317
Can I have your bike?
165
00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:09,990
Wow!
166
00:10:09,990 --> 00:10:11,117
I think it worked.
167
00:10:12,270 --> 00:10:13,103
Oh no.
168
00:10:16,490 --> 00:10:18,160
I guess this is goodbye.
169
00:10:18,160 --> 00:10:19,713
Oh Josh, no.
170
00:10:31,658 --> 00:10:34,241
(upbeat music)
171
00:10:37,370 --> 00:10:38,323
I knew it.
172
00:10:39,930 --> 00:10:41,320
Thanks, Clark.
173
00:10:41,320 --> 00:10:42,980
It's actually Harry.
174
00:10:42,980 --> 00:10:44,430
Caitlyn just doesn't like it.
175
00:10:48,379 --> 00:10:51,504
♪ I'm just wild about Harry ♪
176
00:10:51,504 --> 00:10:54,735
♪ And he's just wild about me ♪
177
00:10:54,735 --> 00:10:58,775
♪ The heavenly blisses of your kisses ♪
178
00:10:58,775 --> 00:11:01,797
♪ Make me feel less ghostly ♪
179
00:11:01,797 --> 00:11:05,089
♪ He's sweet just like cotton candy ♪
180
00:11:05,089 --> 00:11:08,940
♪ Oh boy, oh what a sight to see ♪
181
00:11:08,940 --> 00:11:12,500
♪ Oh I'm just wild about Harry ♪
182
00:11:12,500 --> 00:11:15,900
♪ And he's just wild about, he can't do without ♪
183
00:11:15,900 --> 00:11:19,635
♪ He's just wild about me ♪
184
00:11:19,635 --> 00:11:22,218
(upbeat music)
185
00:11:55,777 --> 00:11:56,610
Ryker!
186
00:11:57,560 --> 00:11:59,100
I've been looking for you.
187
00:11:59,100 --> 00:11:59,943
Yeah, why?
188
00:12:00,820 --> 00:12:02,170
I have a present for you.
189
00:12:03,920 --> 00:12:04,753
Is it alcohol?
190
00:12:05,830 --> 00:12:06,663
Sure.
191
00:12:14,767 --> 00:12:15,743
Thanks.
192
00:12:20,818 --> 00:12:24,318
♪ He's just wild about me ♪
193
00:12:27,312 --> 00:12:30,229
(mysterious music)
12653
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