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1
00:01:03,796 --> 00:01:06,996
Morning.
Morning.
2
00:01:10,716 --> 00:01:13,476
Ah, I had really weird dreams
about Mum last night...
3
00:01:14,556 --> 00:01:15,676
..in this bed.
4
00:01:16,796 --> 00:01:18,316
She was in here, but with a horse.
5
00:01:19,316 --> 00:01:22,476
And the horse was...
reading a newspaper.
6
00:01:27,396 --> 00:01:28,436
Do you think she...
7
00:01:30,356 --> 00:01:31,876
..did it...
8
00:01:31,876 --> 00:01:34,316
in here... with him?
9
00:01:34,315 --> 00:01:36,795
"Did it"?
Well, what would you say?
10
00:01:36,795 --> 00:01:40,635
"Made love."
Ugh, no, God, no.
11
00:01:40,635 --> 00:01:41,675
Well, you asked.
12
00:01:42,915 --> 00:01:43,955
It's just...
13
00:01:45,555 --> 00:01:47,155
..well, what about Dad?
14
00:01:48,235 --> 00:01:51,195
I just need to get this part
of the tender over for ten.
15
00:01:53,155 --> 00:01:54,475
I thought we'd won something.
16
00:01:54,475 --> 00:01:56,755
Turns out we've missed a whole bit
of due diligence.
17
00:02:03,595 --> 00:02:06,235
Can you hear something?
18
00:02:06,235 --> 00:02:08,475
I'm gonna find a cafe,
the reception here's useless.
19
00:02:08,475 --> 00:02:10,145
It'd be easier
to send a carrier pigeon.
20
00:02:10,154 --> 00:02:12,794
Do you want some breakfast?
No, I'm fine. Thank you.
21
00:02:14,274 --> 00:02:16,514
Must be nice
just having to sort yourself out.
22
00:02:16,514 --> 00:02:19,034
Why, what are you doing
that's so pressing?
23
00:02:19,034 --> 00:02:21,554
No, no, I just, I mean in general.
24
00:02:21,554 --> 00:02:23,434
I know what you mean.
25
00:02:23,434 --> 00:02:24,954
Can you hear that?
26
00:02:26,154 --> 00:02:27,514
Yeah, it's a cat.
27
00:02:27,514 --> 00:02:29,914
Yeah, but I think it's coming from
in here.
28
00:02:32,874 --> 00:02:35,634
I'll get the bags from the B&B
and bring them back here, shall I?
29
00:02:35,634 --> 00:02:37,434
No point in paying for somewhere.
30
00:02:37,434 --> 00:02:38,554
Yeah, good idea.
31
00:02:39,554 --> 00:02:42,874
Hey, hello.
32
00:02:42,874 --> 00:02:44,954
I don't think you live here,
do you?
33
00:02:46,633 --> 00:02:48,873
Oh... Oh.
34
00:02:51,513 --> 00:02:53,153
Oh, what have you done?
That looks sore.
35
00:02:53,153 --> 00:02:54,913
That's a Manx cat,
they don't have tails.
36
00:02:55,913 --> 00:02:58,593
She didn't like cats.
Well, it may not be her cat.
37
00:02:58,593 --> 00:03:00,913
Well, that's her bloody cat bowl,
though, innit?
38
00:03:12,193 --> 00:03:14,993
Any thoughts
on who you'd like
39
00:03:14,993 --> 00:03:16,393
to conduct the service?
40
00:03:18,992 --> 00:03:21,352
Oh, she wasn't religious, really.
41
00:03:21,352 --> 00:03:23,072
Weddings and christenings.
42
00:03:25,312 --> 00:03:28,112
OK, well,
I'm sure we can help with that.
43
00:03:29,992 --> 00:03:33,632
Any songs or readings
that were her favourite?
44
00:03:33,632 --> 00:03:35,672
We stopped listening to music.
45
00:03:36,672 --> 00:03:39,192
Well... I did.
46
00:03:39,192 --> 00:03:41,632
She always had her earphones on,
listening to...
47
00:03:43,992 --> 00:03:45,352
..podcasts and whatnot.
48
00:03:47,472 --> 00:03:50,192
Well, if anything comes to you,
just let me know.
49
00:03:53,951 --> 00:03:55,591
I should have asked these things.
50
00:03:57,271 --> 00:04:01,791
It's very common for these
conversations to not take place.
51
00:04:03,671 --> 00:04:05,991
It's not something
everyone likes talking about.
52
00:04:07,791 --> 00:04:10,231
Yeah, but you never really
know someone, do you?
53
00:04:12,271 --> 00:04:14,871
I mean, you know the stuff
they choose to show you,
54
00:04:14,871 --> 00:04:16,871
and the stuff you choose
to listen to.
55
00:04:16,871 --> 00:04:18,111
But all the rest of it...
56
00:04:21,831 --> 00:04:24,071
..they can just carry it around
in their head.
57
00:04:26,151 --> 00:04:29,711
How are you, Mum?
'I'm OK. How are you?'
58
00:04:30,710 --> 00:04:32,230
Yeah, good.
59
00:04:32,230 --> 00:04:34,750
So, do you know
why Gran was there yet?
60
00:04:34,750 --> 00:04:35,830
I think she just...
61
00:04:36,990 --> 00:04:38,870
..fancied a little trip for herself.
62
00:04:40,390 --> 00:04:41,870
How's your dad?
63
00:04:41,870 --> 00:04:45,110
Yeah, he's good.
He worked the washer.
64
00:04:45,110 --> 00:04:46,470
'Medal's in the post
65
00:04:48,070 --> 00:04:51,710
'How's Mol? I tried calling her,
but she's not picking up.'
66
00:04:51,710 --> 00:04:52,950
Oh, she's fine.
67
00:04:52,950 --> 00:04:54,870
'You need to stop worrying.
68
00:04:56,070 --> 00:04:57,750
'Are you OK, Mum?'
69
00:04:57,750 --> 00:04:59,510
Yes, I'm fine.
70
00:05:00,630 --> 00:05:03,430
'Listen, I've got to go. I'm gonna
be late for work, but...
71
00:05:03,430 --> 00:05:04,470
'love you.'
72
00:05:05,509 --> 00:05:06,629
I love you, darling.
73
00:05:14,189 --> 00:05:16,629
Yes, Nick.
I've got that on the third line.
74
00:05:16,629 --> 00:05:18,909
Hiya.
Hi.
75
00:05:18,909 --> 00:05:21,349
Um, listen, Nick,
I'm gonna have to call you back.
76
00:05:21,349 --> 00:05:23,309
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
I'm interrupting.
77
00:05:23,309 --> 00:05:24,349
No, it's fine.
78
00:05:27,429 --> 00:05:29,629
I've never milked an oat.
79
00:05:31,029 --> 00:05:32,549
Milked many cows?
80
00:05:32,549 --> 00:05:36,309
Yes, actually, I have.
I was raised on a farm.
81
00:05:37,709 --> 00:05:39,429
Where was the farm?
82
00:05:39,428 --> 00:05:41,308
Fischer, Texas.
83
00:05:41,308 --> 00:05:43,348
Not a lot of traffic through there.
84
00:05:44,428 --> 00:05:45,468
Kind of like here.
85
00:05:46,508 --> 00:05:48,508
What brought you here, then?
86
00:05:48,508 --> 00:05:50,228
A man.
Oh, really?
87
00:05:50,228 --> 00:05:53,628
No, I liked England
and I like Ireland.
88
00:05:53,628 --> 00:05:55,948
And I thought, "Well, this is like
somewhere in between."
89
00:05:56,948 --> 00:05:58,428
And is it?
Not at all.
90
00:06:00,068 --> 00:06:01,308
No, it's, uh...
91
00:06:03,468 --> 00:06:04,868
..it's its own place, you know.
92
00:06:04,868 --> 00:06:07,468
It's unique.
Unique good?
93
00:06:07,468 --> 00:06:11,428
Most of the time. Small.
I like that.
94
00:06:11,428 --> 00:06:14,868
Look, your business is never
gonna be your own for very long.
95
00:06:16,387 --> 00:06:20,427
We know about Pete.
Oh, you do?
96
00:06:23,867 --> 00:06:26,307
Was it a full-on affair?
97
00:06:27,627 --> 00:06:30,187
Well, they weren't exactly
Rhett Butler and Scarlett O'Hara,
98
00:06:30,187 --> 00:06:32,187
but they were sweet on each other.
99
00:06:34,507 --> 00:06:37,187
So, what's he like? Pete?
100
00:06:38,227 --> 00:06:40,187
Uh, verbose.
101
00:06:42,067 --> 00:06:43,107
A hugger.
102
00:06:44,467 --> 00:06:45,707
He's a bit of a prig.
103
00:06:45,707 --> 00:06:48,747
Hey, I said prig!
104
00:06:51,386 --> 00:06:54,746
No, he's fine. He's fine.
105
00:06:54,746 --> 00:06:57,586
He's just... He must have done
something fancy
106
00:06:57,586 --> 00:06:58,866
before he retired.
107
00:06:58,866 --> 00:07:00,066
You know, he's the kind of guy
108
00:07:00,066 --> 00:07:02,426
that no-one ever told him
his shit stinks.
109
00:07:02,426 --> 00:07:03,466
Right?
110
00:07:04,706 --> 00:07:06,266
Yep.
111
00:07:06,266 --> 00:07:08,626
Recognise that type.
112
00:07:08,626 --> 00:07:09,946
Oh, oh, God bless him.
113
00:07:41,265 --> 00:07:42,505
Rebecca.
114
00:07:42,505 --> 00:07:44,625
I know you were having an affair
with my mum.
115
00:07:45,665 --> 00:07:46,705
Oh.
116
00:07:47,785 --> 00:07:50,505
"Oh"? Is that all you've got to say?
117
00:07:50,505 --> 00:07:55,465
No, I've got a lot to say, actually,
if you'll let me.
118
00:07:56,705 --> 00:07:58,415
Let me make you some tea at least.
119
00:07:59,784 --> 00:08:01,144
Come in, please.
120
00:08:05,264 --> 00:08:08,864
So, who was she? My mum.
121
00:08:09,904 --> 00:08:11,944
Like, really?
122
00:08:11,944 --> 00:08:17,024
Oh, she was charming, thoughtful,
funny as hell.
123
00:08:17,024 --> 00:08:19,584
Mum?
Oh, that doesn't ring a bell?
124
00:08:19,584 --> 00:08:22,904
No! Well, "funny"
wouldn't be the first word
125
00:08:22,904 --> 00:08:24,264
that would leap to mind.
126
00:08:24,264 --> 00:08:25,624
What would be the first word?
127
00:08:27,184 --> 00:08:29,584
"Normal."
Oh, Lord!
128
00:08:29,584 --> 00:08:33,224
God save us from the tyranny
of normality.
129
00:08:34,583 --> 00:08:36,383
What's your sister think
about all of this?
130
00:08:36,383 --> 00:08:38,503
Oh, she's horrified.
131
00:08:39,503 --> 00:08:41,663
Had my mother pegged
as a living saint.
132
00:08:41,663 --> 00:08:42,703
Oh.
133
00:08:44,223 --> 00:08:46,823
It isn't easy being a sister.
134
00:08:46,823 --> 00:08:48,903
I say that from experience.
135
00:08:50,463 --> 00:08:52,823
The world expects you
to have this great deep bond
136
00:08:52,823 --> 00:08:56,423
and my sister was a pain in the ass,
God rest her soul.
137
00:08:56,423 --> 00:08:58,263
I'm sorry.
No, no, it wasn't her fault.
138
00:08:58,263 --> 00:09:00,703
My mother babied me,
and she was a bitch about it.
139
00:09:00,703 --> 00:09:01,783
Hm.
140
00:09:01,783 --> 00:09:06,103
Well, that's about $10,000 worth of
psychotherapy right there, isn't it?
141
00:09:06,103 --> 00:09:09,263
Well, my mum definitely believed in
horses for courses.
142
00:09:09,262 --> 00:09:12,302
And you got the steeple chase.
Yeah.
143
00:09:15,262 --> 00:09:16,782
She treat you girls differently?
144
00:09:17,902 --> 00:09:19,582
You could say.
Hm.
145
00:09:21,822 --> 00:09:25,222
Well... what would you need
to know about your mother
146
00:09:25,222 --> 00:09:26,702
that might help you, Ros?
147
00:09:30,862 --> 00:09:31,902
I don't know.
148
00:09:42,821 --> 00:09:44,061
She wanted you to know.
149
00:09:46,821 --> 00:09:51,781
She wanted to show you the island,
the life that she'd chosen.
150
00:09:53,221 --> 00:09:54,861
It's nice she thought
she had a choice.
151
00:09:55,821 --> 00:09:57,501
She didn't think to tell my dad,
though.
152
00:10:00,941 --> 00:10:02,461
My dad knew?
153
00:10:03,701 --> 00:10:04,781
No, he didn't.
154
00:10:06,781 --> 00:10:09,941
My dad loved my mum.
I don't doubt that he did.
155
00:10:09,941 --> 00:10:12,101
You loved her better, did you?
No...
156
00:10:13,901 --> 00:10:17,101
..I just loved her, that's all.
157
00:10:26,140 --> 00:10:28,660
So... what did you do together?
158
00:10:30,900 --> 00:10:32,660
What did you talk about?
159
00:10:32,660 --> 00:10:36,140
We had a...
a shared love of history...
160
00:10:36,140 --> 00:10:38,460
of music... literature.
161
00:10:39,460 --> 00:10:40,500
What literature?
162
00:10:42,060 --> 00:10:44,660
Emily Bronte, Wuthering Heights.
163
00:10:46,180 --> 00:10:47,940
Edna O'Brien.
164
00:10:47,940 --> 00:10:50,380
Maeve Binchy? Jackie Collins?
165
00:10:52,659 --> 00:10:54,459
This is...
So, what was her plan, long term?
166
00:10:54,459 --> 00:10:57,099
She was just gonna busk it
and wait for my dad to die?
167
00:10:57,099 --> 00:10:59,139
Or she just saw it as a...
168
00:11:00,819 --> 00:11:02,699
..dirty secret?
169
00:11:02,699 --> 00:11:04,979
No... No.
170
00:11:04,979 --> 00:11:07,219
It really wasn't like that.
171
00:11:08,579 --> 00:11:10,819
She wanted to make the move here
permanently.
172
00:11:10,819 --> 00:11:11,899
No, she didn't.
173
00:11:11,899 --> 00:11:14,619
Becca, please,
what I'm saying is the truth.
174
00:11:14,619 --> 00:11:16,579
And you must hear me
because this is important.
175
00:11:16,579 --> 00:11:19,339
She was happy here... really happy.
176
00:11:19,339 --> 00:11:22,419
She told me that
if anything were to happen to her...
177
00:11:22,419 --> 00:11:24,579
she wanted to remain here.
178
00:11:24,579 --> 00:11:25,619
No.
179
00:11:27,578 --> 00:11:28,618
She's coming home.
180
00:11:29,738 --> 00:11:31,098
I don't even know who you are,
181
00:11:31,098 --> 00:11:33,858
you're just some bloke
who found her dead.
182
00:11:33,858 --> 00:11:35,018
You don't know her.
183
00:11:35,018 --> 00:11:38,538
Becca, please... I know her.
184
00:11:40,738 --> 00:11:44,378
She went to Flixton High School
for girls.
185
00:11:44,378 --> 00:11:48,418
Her first job was at
Metropolitan-Vickers near Ringway,
186
00:11:48,418 --> 00:11:50,418
in the accounts department.
187
00:11:50,418 --> 00:11:52,818
She wanted to write,
188
00:11:52,818 --> 00:11:55,218
but she thought that writing
wasn't for people like her,
189
00:11:55,218 --> 00:11:59,338
so she wrote in secret,
and she wrote beautifully.
190
00:12:00,378 --> 00:12:02,098
I would love you to see
some of her writing.
191
00:12:02,098 --> 00:12:03,618
No.
192
00:12:03,617 --> 00:12:06,777
Becca. Becca, please.
193
00:12:06,777 --> 00:12:10,737
You must understand that
I cared very deeply for your mother.
194
00:12:26,497 --> 00:12:27,977
Your bag's in the kitchen.
195
00:12:31,497 --> 00:12:32,577
I went to see Pete.
196
00:12:34,057 --> 00:12:35,457
And?
197
00:12:35,457 --> 00:12:37,697
She was happy here, apparently.
198
00:12:38,656 --> 00:12:41,056
And, um, you're gonna like this
199
00:12:41,056 --> 00:12:44,056
It was her wish
to stay on the island.
200
00:12:46,336 --> 00:12:48,136
And she can stay here
for all I care.
201
00:12:49,256 --> 00:12:51,336
You don't mean that.
202
00:12:59,856 --> 00:13:01,016
Hello?
203
00:13:11,576 --> 00:13:13,736
We've had the results
from the postmortem.
204
00:13:15,015 --> 00:13:16,735
I'm sorry to have to tell you this,
205
00:13:16,735 --> 00:13:19,655
but your mother had consumed
a lethal amount of morphine.
206
00:13:21,455 --> 00:13:22,495
What?
207
00:13:24,775 --> 00:13:26,015
How could that have happened?
208
00:13:29,975 --> 00:13:31,615
Are you saying our mother...
209
00:13:33,895 --> 00:13:36,015
..took her own life?
210
00:13:36,015 --> 00:13:38,855
I'm sorry,
but it does look that way.
211
00:13:44,055 --> 00:13:46,455
Morphine? What...?
212
00:13:46,455 --> 00:13:49,565
How was it taken? When was it taken?
213
00:13:49,574 --> 00:13:52,014
The coroner will deliver all this
in her findings
214
00:13:52,014 --> 00:13:53,894
once all the information
has been gathered.
215
00:13:53,894 --> 00:13:56,014
Well, you need to get it gathered.
What else is there?
216
00:13:56,014 --> 00:13:57,374
That's what they're trying to do.
217
00:13:57,374 --> 00:14:00,294
Was she taking it for pain relief,
have you at least established that?
218
00:14:00,294 --> 00:14:02,814
We're still awaiting
her medical records from the UK.
219
00:14:02,814 --> 00:14:05,094
Are they coming on horseback?
I'll call the doctor's.
220
00:14:05,094 --> 00:14:06,534
Who gave it to her?
221
00:14:06,534 --> 00:14:08,054
Oh, she just took it herself,
did she?
222
00:14:08,054 --> 00:14:10,254
Dead woman OD'd on morphine,
case closed. Is that it?
223
00:14:10,254 --> 00:14:12,174
Why am I the one
asking all the questions?
224
00:14:12,174 --> 00:14:15,494
We are doing everything we can.
225
00:14:15,494 --> 00:14:17,974
Can you tell
if she took it on purpose?
226
00:14:19,094 --> 00:14:20,734
I mean,
how can you even know for certain?
227
00:14:20,734 --> 00:14:24,374
The amount in her stomach suggests
that it was taken in one go
228
00:14:24,373 --> 00:14:26,093
with the purpose of ending her life.
229
00:14:27,253 --> 00:14:29,253
The toxicology reports
we're awaiting on,
230
00:14:29,253 --> 00:14:32,853
hair strand testing, will show us if
there was a history of use or abuse,
231
00:14:32,853 --> 00:14:34,613
although there were no signs
of any illness
232
00:14:34,613 --> 00:14:36,733
that would support the need
for morphine use.
233
00:14:36,733 --> 00:14:38,893
Uh, and when will you get
these reports?
234
00:14:38,893 --> 00:14:42,293
in the next day or two.
And what if someone gave it to her?
235
00:14:42,293 --> 00:14:44,453
We've followed up
all lines of inquiry
236
00:14:44,453 --> 00:14:47,093
and we have no reason to believe
that anyone else was involved.
237
00:14:47,093 --> 00:14:49,893
And you're not interested
in where she got the morphine from?
238
00:14:55,693 --> 00:14:59,133
Ms Ward, we are following all leads.
239
00:14:59,132 --> 00:15:01,172
When we have a clearer picture
we'll be able to say
240
00:15:01,172 --> 00:15:03,132
if there's cause
for a criminal investigation.
241
00:15:03,132 --> 00:15:05,012
At the moment, it's...
Right. Yeah, thank you.
242
00:15:05,012 --> 00:15:06,492
..a matter for the coroner.
243
00:15:25,052 --> 00:15:27,812
Was she taking morphine
cos there was something wrong?
244
00:15:30,332 --> 00:15:33,252
Was it too much for her, being here?
Lying?
245
00:15:35,331 --> 00:15:36,371
Becca?
246
00:15:38,171 --> 00:15:41,011
What do you think?
I don't know.
247
00:15:42,131 --> 00:15:44,451
Well, you don't have to know,
but you must have an opinion.
248
00:15:46,131 --> 00:15:47,771
Bec, where are you going?
249
00:15:49,931 --> 00:15:50,971
Becca?
250
00:15:59,851 --> 00:16:01,571
'All right, babe?'
Jim?
251
00:16:01,571 --> 00:16:04,491
Alexa,
put butter on my shopping list.
252
00:16:04,491 --> 00:16:06,691
'I've put butter
on your shopping list.'
253
00:16:06,690 --> 00:16:08,250
'All the butter's gone.'
Jim?
254
00:16:08,250 --> 00:16:11,850
'Didn't you only buy some weekend?
Sorry, go on, babe.'
255
00:16:13,490 --> 00:16:15,970
I found some things out about Mum.
256
00:16:16,930 --> 00:16:17,970
'Oh, yeah?'
257
00:16:19,050 --> 00:16:20,610
She was having an affair.
258
00:16:20,610 --> 00:16:24,330
'An affair?
Oh, Mary, you dark horse.'
259
00:16:24,330 --> 00:16:26,170
No, not dark horse.
260
00:16:27,530 --> 00:16:29,370
Why don't you listen?
261
00:16:29,370 --> 00:16:31,010
'I am listening.
I'm all ears, go on.'
262
00:16:32,130 --> 00:16:33,410
No, it's fine. I'm gonna go.
263
00:17:32,568 --> 00:17:33,728
Becca?
264
00:17:39,528 --> 00:17:41,208
This lot can go to a charity shop.
265
00:17:42,568 --> 00:17:43,768
Oh, so you're talking now?
266
00:17:48,768 --> 00:17:50,648
Becca, we need to sort
this whole mess out.
267
00:17:56,087 --> 00:17:58,647
I'm gonna go for a run.
Now?
268
00:17:58,647 --> 00:18:00,247
Well, yeah. Why?
269
00:18:00,247 --> 00:18:02,567
Is there something you think
we should be doing together?
270
00:18:02,567 --> 00:18:05,127
Nope.
Right, then.
271
00:18:11,847 --> 00:18:13,967
Pete, it's Rosaline.
272
00:18:49,926 --> 00:18:52,806
Ah... Oh...
273
00:18:52,806 --> 00:18:54,406
You OK?
274
00:18:54,406 --> 00:18:55,806
Ah...
Right?
275
00:18:55,806 --> 00:18:57,806
Yeah, I'm fine. I'm fine.
Here, give me your hand.
276
00:18:57,806 --> 00:18:58,846
Give me your hand.
277
00:19:01,725 --> 00:19:04,645
Argh.
Whoops, all right.
278
00:19:04,645 --> 00:19:07,605
Yeah? What did you hurt?
279
00:19:10,085 --> 00:19:11,565
I... honestly, I'm fine.
280
00:19:11,565 --> 00:19:15,165
All right, yeah, all right. Just...
Deep breath. Take your time.
281
00:19:16,525 --> 00:19:18,285
OK, then.
Thanks.
282
00:19:22,765 --> 00:19:23,885
There you are.
283
00:19:25,325 --> 00:19:29,245
Drink the Coke, then the water.
I don't have sugar.
284
00:19:29,245 --> 00:19:30,365
Get it down you.
285
00:19:41,484 --> 00:19:43,644
I'm really not hungry.
Eat it.
286
00:19:53,164 --> 00:19:55,604
Are you peeling a pie?
287
00:19:58,604 --> 00:20:01,804
Yes. It would appear that I am.
288
00:20:09,084 --> 00:20:12,484
Better?
Mm.
289
00:20:12,483 --> 00:20:14,083
How's life on the island going?
290
00:20:16,843 --> 00:20:17,963
Well...
291
00:20:20,803 --> 00:20:22,803
..me mother was living a double life
292
00:20:22,803 --> 00:20:26,003
and, it would seem, killed herself.
293
00:20:26,003 --> 00:20:28,883
And my sister's abdicated
all responsibility.
294
00:20:28,883 --> 00:20:31,723
So just dandy.
Oh.
295
00:20:33,403 --> 00:20:36,403
Sorry. That's a lot.
Mm.
296
00:20:39,603 --> 00:20:42,803
My mother... of all people.
297
00:20:45,043 --> 00:20:46,283
Topped herself.
298
00:20:48,642 --> 00:20:49,762
Were you close?
299
00:20:52,322 --> 00:20:53,442
Not massively.
300
00:20:54,482 --> 00:20:57,002
I mean, we pretended we were,
cos that's what you do...
301
00:20:57,002 --> 00:20:59,202
Mm.
..but we weren't.
302
00:20:59,202 --> 00:21:03,042
I was the same. My mum was tricky...
303
00:21:04,882 --> 00:21:07,202
..but it still hit me
like a ton of bricks when she died,
304
00:21:07,202 --> 00:21:08,682
like, you know.
305
00:21:09,882 --> 00:21:13,562
I'm sorry.
I suppose Larkin said it best.
306
00:21:13,562 --> 00:21:16,082
"They fuck you up, your mum and dad
307
00:21:16,082 --> 00:21:18,242
"They may not mean to, but they do."
308
00:21:19,802 --> 00:21:22,402
Larkin?
Mm.
309
00:21:22,401 --> 00:21:24,601
Any more hidden depths
I need to know about?
310
00:21:30,241 --> 00:21:31,761
Here you are.
311
00:21:33,601 --> 00:21:35,401
What about your dad?
Is he still alive?
312
00:21:38,921 --> 00:21:41,881
Very much so.
Were they together?
313
00:21:44,081 --> 00:21:45,281
Very much so.
314
00:21:47,641 --> 00:21:49,001
What are you gonna say to him?
315
00:21:53,361 --> 00:21:54,641
I have no idea.
316
00:22:04,600 --> 00:22:07,760
Thank you.
For what?
317
00:22:07,760 --> 00:22:10,560
Picking me up
off the side of the road.
318
00:22:10,560 --> 00:22:13,480
Feeding me pie. Allowing me to vent.
319
00:22:14,640 --> 00:22:15,720
Listen...
320
00:22:17,240 --> 00:22:18,560
..if you need anything,
321
00:22:18,560 --> 00:22:21,840
I live in the fisherman's cottage
in the village.
322
00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:23,040
Course you do.
323
00:22:29,120 --> 00:22:31,080
See ya.
Bye.
324
00:23:15,318 --> 00:23:17,958
'Hi, Dad.'
Where are you?
325
00:23:17,958 --> 00:23:20,958
' I'm in the shed.'
Oh, right.
326
00:23:20,958 --> 00:23:22,558
Dad...
327
00:23:24,798 --> 00:23:27,918
..the thing is, it looks like Mum...
328
00:23:33,358 --> 00:23:38,678
..like she might have taken
something, like... an overdose.
329
00:23:38,678 --> 00:23:42,798
Yeah, I had a... police officer
come round, say t'same thing.
330
00:23:44,277 --> 00:23:46,077
What, you knew?
'Well...
331
00:23:46,077 --> 00:23:48,597
'Well, I knew they were making
daft claims. Load of nonsense.'
332
00:23:50,037 --> 00:23:51,477
'They had proof, Dad.
333
00:23:52,637 --> 00:23:54,597
'They found morphine
in her stomach.'
334
00:23:59,677 --> 00:24:01,677
Well, when's she coming home, then?
335
00:24:04,077 --> 00:24:05,357
We're working on it.
336
00:24:06,357 --> 00:24:08,157
Dad, could you maybe go round
to Jim's?
337
00:24:08,157 --> 00:24:09,517
'No, I'm fine.
338
00:24:11,437 --> 00:24:13,117
'Thank you.'
339
00:24:13,117 --> 00:24:14,997
Yeah, I don't really like you
being on your own.
340
00:24:16,356 --> 00:24:18,756
Yeah, well, I am now, aren't I?
So I'd better get used to it.
341
00:24:20,436 --> 00:24:23,836
'Right, bye, love.'
Bye, Dad.
342
00:24:39,876 --> 00:24:41,356
Becca?
343
00:24:44,756 --> 00:24:45,996
Place is a tip.
344
00:24:47,836 --> 00:24:50,516
Becca, what you doing?
Well, we haven't...
345
00:24:50,515 --> 00:24:52,795
haven't all got time
to go swanning round the island
346
00:24:52,795 --> 00:24:54,635
with the first bloke
we clap eyes on.
347
00:24:55,995 --> 00:24:57,795
Cos cleaning the grouting
with a toothbrush
348
00:24:57,795 --> 00:24:58,955
is God's work, is it?
349
00:24:58,955 --> 00:25:00,195
Well, it's something.
350
00:25:01,155 --> 00:25:03,195
Pete's on his way, and so's Cathy.
No.
351
00:25:03,195 --> 00:25:05,075
I just wanna talk to them,
tell them about Mum.
352
00:25:05,075 --> 00:25:08,075
See if there's anything they know.
I don't wanna talk to those people.
353
00:25:08,075 --> 00:25:09,555
Please, Becca.
354
00:25:22,595 --> 00:25:25,665
..the police have confirmed that,
355
00:25:27,314 --> 00:25:32,394
..Mum... took an overdose
of morphine.
356
00:25:33,754 --> 00:25:35,034
She took her own life?
357
00:25:37,354 --> 00:25:38,434
No.
358
00:25:41,154 --> 00:25:42,274
Do you know why?
359
00:25:45,114 --> 00:25:46,234
Pete?
360
00:25:47,914 --> 00:25:49,194
Rosaline would like to know
361
00:25:49,194 --> 00:25:52,074
if there's any reason why her mother
would've taken her own life.
362
00:25:57,234 --> 00:25:59,954
Your mother was diagnosed
with Alzheimer's.
363
00:26:01,753 --> 00:26:05,153
Wh... Uh...
364
00:26:11,833 --> 00:26:15,993
you need to tell me everything.
This is everything.
365
00:26:17,553 --> 00:26:19,913
Why would she take her own life?
366
00:26:19,913 --> 00:26:23,393
I said that I'd look after her.
367
00:26:25,793 --> 00:26:29,713
Did you know about this?
Oh, don't be ridiculous.
368
00:26:29,713 --> 00:26:32,633
You talked to her all the time.
YOU talked to her all the time.
369
00:26:32,633 --> 00:26:35,113
Wait. When was she diagnosed
with Alzheimer's?
370
00:26:36,152 --> 00:26:37,912
A year ago.
371
00:26:39,872 --> 00:26:41,592
She started forgetting things.
372
00:26:43,432 --> 00:26:45,912
Oh, you must have realised that
when you talked to her.
373
00:26:47,112 --> 00:26:50,712
Yes, but, well,
she's always been forgetful.
374
00:26:51,752 --> 00:26:54,032
She said she wanted to put the worry
out of her mind
375
00:26:54,032 --> 00:26:56,192
and get on with her life.
376
00:26:57,232 --> 00:26:58,432
So, she got tested...
377
00:26:59,752 --> 00:27:02,192
..and the results
were not what she wanted.
378
00:27:02,192 --> 00:27:07,472
I told her when the time came,
I'd look after her.
379
00:27:07,472 --> 00:27:09,352
So she said nothing
to either of you
380
00:27:09,351 --> 00:27:12,471
about not wanting to be here
any more?
381
00:27:12,471 --> 00:27:13,671
Nothing.
382
00:27:16,511 --> 00:27:19,071
But if she was here
and she was your friend,
383
00:27:19,071 --> 00:27:22,831
and she was your lover,
she must have said something.
384
00:27:22,831 --> 00:27:24,351
There must have been some clue.
385
00:27:24,351 --> 00:27:26,151
I mean,
when was the last time you saw her?
386
00:27:26,151 --> 00:27:27,911
What did you do? What did she say?
387
00:27:28,951 --> 00:27:33,031
Five days ago, we had a picnic.
388
00:27:34,431 --> 00:27:36,591
Went out for a drive. We...
389
00:27:39,991 --> 00:27:42,391
We had a perfect day.
390
00:27:44,470 --> 00:27:45,750
Did you?
391
00:27:48,350 --> 00:27:50,550
So perfect she thought,
"Time to kill meself"?
392
00:28:27,509 --> 00:28:29,389
Hey.
'Hiya, Mum.
393
00:28:29,389 --> 00:28:32,949
'Just checking in.
When are you coming home?'
394
00:28:32,949 --> 00:28:35,669
I don't know, darling.
Is your dad not there?
395
00:28:35,669 --> 00:28:38,109
Yeah, I'm here, babe.
396
00:28:38,109 --> 00:28:39,989
Yeah. He wants to know
where the shower gel is.
397
00:28:39,989 --> 00:28:43,429
Do you know, Mum?
Oh, my God.
398
00:28:43,429 --> 00:28:44,949
All right, Bec.
399
00:28:44,949 --> 00:28:46,949
Don't bite her head off.
I was asking her, not you.
400
00:28:46,949 --> 00:28:49,629
'But you were asking
because you don't know.'
401
00:28:53,149 --> 00:28:55,469
Jesus, Becca,
have the afternoon off, will you?
402
00:28:55,468 --> 00:28:57,308
Where are the plasters?
403
00:28:57,308 --> 00:28:59,988
What's that gotta do
with the price of fish?
404
00:28:59,988 --> 00:29:01,628
'Kitchen. Third drawer down.'
405
00:29:01,628 --> 00:29:03,588
Right, great. Thank you.
That's very useful.
406
00:29:03,588 --> 00:29:05,508
'When's the last time
that you sent...'
407
00:29:05,508 --> 00:29:09,748
a card to anyone in the family?
Christmas, birthday, Thank You...
408
00:29:09,748 --> 00:29:11,708
'The last time?'
409
00:29:11,708 --> 00:29:13,628
I'm not playing this game right now,
Becca.
410
00:29:13,628 --> 00:29:15,668
'I just want you to put yourself
in my shoes.'
411
00:29:15,668 --> 00:29:17,428
I am.
412
00:29:17,428 --> 00:29:20,948
Look, your mum's died,
and your head's gone. I get it.
413
00:29:20,948 --> 00:29:24,468
We'll have this conversation
when you've calmed down a bit.
414
00:29:24,468 --> 00:29:27,908
'I'll speak to you later.'
Urgh.
415
00:29:35,547 --> 00:29:36,787
I've run you a bath.
416
00:29:39,867 --> 00:29:42,947
What for?
Cos.
417
00:29:53,187 --> 00:29:54,707
Thanks.
418
00:29:57,547 --> 00:30:00,707
Oh, OK. You get in.
419
00:30:00,707 --> 00:30:03,747
Oh, God, you can look.
420
00:30:03,746 --> 00:30:05,146
You've seen it all before.
421
00:30:12,346 --> 00:30:13,626
Is that better?
422
00:30:17,946 --> 00:30:19,466
Here you go.
423
00:30:20,866 --> 00:30:22,186
Well, stay and talk to me.
424
00:30:24,226 --> 00:30:25,506
OK.
425
00:30:33,026 --> 00:30:37,466
Yeah, I think she was a bit strange,
last few times I saw her.
426
00:30:39,985 --> 00:30:43,625
She bit my head off
for no reason the other month.
427
00:30:43,625 --> 00:30:44,745
And...
428
00:30:47,465 --> 00:30:49,785
..she'd washed a load of cash
in the washing machine.
429
00:30:51,105 --> 00:30:56,025
But, I mean, it's waterproof now,
so we just... laughed it off.
430
00:30:57,265 --> 00:30:58,745
You can't beat yourself up.
431
00:31:02,465 --> 00:31:05,465
Well, I think we should both
be beating ourselves up.
432
00:31:08,585 --> 00:31:10,745
I'm fucking furious.
433
00:31:12,065 --> 00:31:13,855
And why aren't you?
434
00:31:17,264 --> 00:31:18,384
I don't know what I am.
435
00:31:23,104 --> 00:31:24,944
Should we just go out?
436
00:31:26,184 --> 00:31:27,624
What, of the house?
437
00:31:28,704 --> 00:31:30,784
I feel like I need
to get out my skin.
438
00:31:41,984 --> 00:31:43,104
So, this is nice.
439
00:31:55,343 --> 00:31:57,063
Shall we go somewhere
with a bit more life?
440
00:32:06,263 --> 00:32:09,183
Oh, it's all right in here.
441
00:32:09,183 --> 00:32:12,823
Are you serious?
It's like the Star Wars cantina.
442
00:32:12,823 --> 00:32:15,863
You're such a snob.
Thank God one of us is.
443
00:32:15,863 --> 00:32:17,063
You all right, love?
444
00:32:17,063 --> 00:32:20,583
Can we have two gin and tonics
and two tequilas?
445
00:32:20,583 --> 00:32:23,663
No tequilas.
I'm not holding your hair back.
446
00:32:23,662 --> 00:32:24,902
All right.
447
00:32:30,222 --> 00:32:32,582
I spoke to Dad.
Without me?
448
00:32:32,582 --> 00:32:34,622
I just felt he needed telling.
449
00:32:36,502 --> 00:32:38,942
Anyway, he didn't need telling.
He already knew.
450
00:32:38,942 --> 00:32:40,662
About the morphine?
451
00:32:42,462 --> 00:32:47,222
Or the adoption? Or the Alzheimer's?
Or the affair?
452
00:32:48,702 --> 00:32:49,942
There you go.
453
00:33:01,541 --> 00:33:03,621
You've had affairs with married men,
haven't you?
454
00:33:03,621 --> 00:33:05,101
Thank you. Yes, I have.
455
00:33:05,101 --> 00:33:09,461
Well, tell me, does it add to the...
of it all?
456
00:33:10,781 --> 00:33:13,421
No.
Well, it must do.
457
00:33:13,421 --> 00:33:15,781
It's not like that.
Well, what is it like, then, mm?
458
00:33:15,781 --> 00:33:17,781
Tell me.
No. Why not?
459
00:33:17,781 --> 00:33:20,181
Because it'll make me
feel like shit.
460
00:33:22,821 --> 00:33:24,741
One, two. You getting that?
461
00:33:39,700 --> 00:33:42,380
Hi.
Hi.
462
00:33:44,060 --> 00:33:46,100
What's your name?
463
00:33:47,220 --> 00:33:49,740
Becca.
Becca.
464
00:33:50,980 --> 00:33:53,220
Right, who's next?
Do I go?
465
00:33:53,220 --> 00:33:55,060
Oh, no, no, no. Not you lot.
466
00:33:55,060 --> 00:33:58,460
You're hogging it.
Give someone else a chance.
467
00:33:58,460 --> 00:33:59,940
Becca.
Oh, no.
468
00:33:59,940 --> 00:34:01,180
Come on.
Yeah.
469
00:34:01,180 --> 00:34:03,980
Come on. Come on.
470
00:34:06,860 --> 00:34:08,380
Ooh.
471
00:34:13,139 --> 00:34:18,619
# Shh
It's oh so quiet
472
00:34:22,899 --> 00:34:25,659
# It's oh so still... #
473
00:34:25,659 --> 00:34:29,859
Oh, shit! Shit, shit, shit, shit!
474
00:34:29,859 --> 00:34:32,299
# All alone... #
475
00:34:32,299 --> 00:34:33,619
Oh, for God's sake!
476
00:34:34,699 --> 00:34:38,979
# And so peaceful until
477
00:34:38,979 --> 00:34:43,139
# You fall in love
Zing, boom
478
00:34:43,138 --> 00:34:46,778
# The sky up above
Zing, boom
479
00:34:46,778 --> 00:34:50,538
# Is caving in
Wow, bam
480
00:34:50,538 --> 00:34:53,458
# You've never
Been so nuts about a guy
481
00:34:53,458 --> 00:34:55,538
# You wanna laugh
You wanna cry
482
00:34:55,538 --> 00:34:57,938
# You cross your heart
And hope to die
483
00:34:57,938 --> 00:34:59,138
# Till it's over... #
484
00:34:59,138 --> 00:35:01,018
That's enough, Becca, let's go.
No.
485
00:35:01,018 --> 00:35:02,178
You can have a drink at home.
486
00:35:02,178 --> 00:35:03,898
I'm staying. Shh.
No, you're not, come on.
487
00:35:03,898 --> 00:35:06,658
Shh! Are you the only one
who's allowed to have any fun?
488
00:35:06,658 --> 00:35:08,538
Is this fun?
Yes, actually.
489
00:35:08,538 --> 00:35:09,978
If you don't wanna be here, go home.
490
00:35:09,978 --> 00:35:12,218
I'm not leaving you here.
Well, I'm not coming with you.
491
00:35:12,218 --> 00:35:13,978
So either join in,
sit there with a face...
492
00:35:13,978 --> 00:35:16,378
You know what, just go home.
And what about Jim?
493
00:35:16,378 --> 00:35:18,618
I only sat on his knee.
494
00:35:18,617 --> 00:35:20,937
What's up?
Is he not married enough for you?
495
00:35:20,937 --> 00:35:23,657
You're a dick. Do what you like.
496
00:35:23,657 --> 00:35:27,897
# You blow a fuse
Zing, boom
497
00:35:27,897 --> 00:35:31,697
# The devil cuts loose
Zing, boom
498
00:35:31,697 --> 00:35:35,097
# So what's the use
Wow, bam
499
00:35:35,097 --> 00:35:37,577
# Of falling in love? #
500
00:35:43,097 --> 00:35:44,177
Agh!
501
00:35:45,977 --> 00:35:47,617
Jim, it's Rosaline.
502
00:35:47,617 --> 00:35:50,017
I'm sorry for calling so late,
but I'm worried about Becca.
503
00:35:50,017 --> 00:35:51,977
She's...
504
00:35:51,977 --> 00:35:54,057
Anyway, call me back when you can.
505
00:36:05,456 --> 00:36:07,936
Mm. Bums up.
506
00:36:25,736 --> 00:36:27,136
Oh, my God!
507
00:36:39,295 --> 00:36:40,495
Hey.
508
00:36:43,095 --> 00:36:44,775
Just can't go back to that house.
509
00:36:47,855 --> 00:36:49,775
Come in.
510
00:37:06,974 --> 00:37:11,214
Oh, hi. It's Rosaline Ward.
just calling to see
511
00:37:11,214 --> 00:37:14,494
if there'd been any results back
from my biopsy.
512
00:37:16,574 --> 00:37:19,294
Yeah. Yes, of course.
513
00:37:20,534 --> 00:37:22,294
Thank you.
514
00:37:30,494 --> 00:37:33,774
Morning.
Morning.
515
00:37:35,214 --> 00:37:37,454
Thank you so much for...
Oh, no bother.
516
00:37:40,133 --> 00:37:42,173
I wonder how your sister's head is
this morning.
517
00:37:44,173 --> 00:37:45,413
Better go and check on her.
518
00:37:51,653 --> 00:37:52,973
Coffee?
519
00:37:52,973 --> 00:37:55,373
Yeah, great.
OK.
520
00:38:11,613 --> 00:38:15,533
Urgh. Jesus.
521
00:38:38,532 --> 00:38:40,332
Oh, shit.
522
00:38:47,491 --> 00:38:50,091
'Becca, Rosaline called me.
523
00:38:50,091 --> 00:38:52,091
'What the hell are you playing at?
Call me.
524
00:38:54,611 --> 00:38:57,371
'Becca. Where are you?
It's three in the morning.
525
00:38:57,371 --> 00:38:58,971
'I need you to call me.'
526
00:39:01,051 --> 00:39:02,811
Pfft.
527
00:39:02,811 --> 00:39:04,811
What about your dad?
528
00:39:04,811 --> 00:39:08,251
Yeah, he was OK.
Pipe and slippers man.
529
00:39:08,251 --> 00:39:11,171
Worked in finance here,
and I followed him into it.
530
00:39:12,691 --> 00:39:15,611
Wait, you worked in finance?
Can't you tell?
531
00:39:15,611 --> 00:39:17,971
I was a big hitter, me.
532
00:39:21,570 --> 00:39:25,010
Do you have brothers and sisters?
Yeah, brother lives in Kirk Michael.
533
00:39:25,010 --> 00:39:27,930
We're close.
So, what about you and your sister?
534
00:39:27,930 --> 00:39:29,090
Oh!
535
00:39:30,810 --> 00:39:34,170
My therapist says we were forged
in the same fire.
536
00:39:35,410 --> 00:39:38,010
That's just therapy speak
for "grew up in the same house."
537
00:39:38,010 --> 00:39:39,210
You can live in the same house
538
00:39:39,210 --> 00:39:41,970
but have wildly different
experiences, can't you?
539
00:39:51,170 --> 00:39:53,370
Sorry.
540
00:39:53,370 --> 00:39:55,050
I didn't mean to upset you.
541
00:40:00,849 --> 00:40:02,009
I had cancer.
542
00:40:06,889 --> 00:40:11,169
Once when I was a teenager,
and then again about ten years ago.
543
00:40:15,569 --> 00:40:19,249
So, yeah,
we had wildly different experiences.
544
00:40:19,249 --> 00:40:20,369
I'm so sorry.
545
00:40:22,129 --> 00:40:23,489
It's OK.
546
00:40:24,849 --> 00:40:28,489
It's me mum. I mean...
547
00:40:31,688 --> 00:40:33,688
Oh, God,
this sounds so self-indulgent,
548
00:40:33,688 --> 00:40:37,728
but I know what it's like
to be poorly, you know?
549
00:40:40,048 --> 00:40:43,048
You think life might get taken away
in a moment.
550
00:40:46,928 --> 00:40:48,448
How could she do what she did?
551
00:40:53,768 --> 00:40:55,568
I mean, so what?
She had Alzheimer's.
552
00:40:55,568 --> 00:40:57,408
Why did she get to just give up?
I didn't.
553
00:41:02,888 --> 00:41:04,928
And it's bloody hard to keep going.
554
00:41:24,367 --> 00:41:27,567
How dare you interfere
in my marriage.
555
00:41:27,567 --> 00:41:30,327
What did you say to him?
I was worried about you.
556
00:41:31,527 --> 00:41:33,927
What were you playing at?
You look like shit.
557
00:41:33,927 --> 00:41:35,367
Don't judge me.
558
00:41:35,367 --> 00:41:39,847
Oh, it's OK for you
to judge me all of the time!
559
00:41:39,847 --> 00:41:42,047
We're not doing this.
We need to talk about Mum. No, no.
560
00:41:42,046 --> 00:41:43,966
When do I judge you?
561
00:41:43,966 --> 00:41:46,286
Asking me what it's like
to have affairs with married men.
562
00:41:46,286 --> 00:41:48,086
Pretending
it's just an innocent question,
563
00:41:48,086 --> 00:41:49,366
when it's all judgement.
564
00:41:49,366 --> 00:41:53,206
That isn't judgement, Rosaline.
That's called having an opinion.
565
00:41:53,206 --> 00:41:55,726
So you're allowed to have
a firm, out-loud opinion about that,
566
00:41:55,726 --> 00:41:58,366
but I couldn't mention your sham
of a marriage, for example.
567
00:41:58,366 --> 00:41:59,526
What does that mean?
568
00:41:59,526 --> 00:42:01,886
"Oh, look at us.
We had life sewn up at 18,
569
00:42:01,886 --> 00:42:03,806
"and we're gonna let you all
know about it."
570
00:42:03,806 --> 00:42:07,926
How have I got life sewn up?
I do everything in this family.
571
00:42:07,926 --> 00:42:09,326
Don't give me that!
What do you do?
572
00:42:09,326 --> 00:42:11,086
You just swan in
for high days and holidays.
573
00:42:11,086 --> 00:42:12,806
Don't give me that.
You love being needed.
574
00:42:12,806 --> 00:42:15,046
You always have.
It isn't being needed.
575
00:42:15,046 --> 00:42:17,046
It's called being an adult.
576
00:42:17,045 --> 00:42:20,605
You're not an adult! You're 18.
577
00:42:20,605 --> 00:42:23,205
You're stuck in 1995,
when you got with Jim.
578
00:42:23,205 --> 00:42:25,685
You don't even put petrol
in your own car, for God's sake.
579
00:42:25,685 --> 00:42:27,885
"To the moon. To the moon."
580
00:42:27,885 --> 00:42:30,085
Don't talk to me
about being an adult.
581
00:42:31,165 --> 00:42:33,085
I've got two teenage kids.
582
00:42:33,085 --> 00:42:36,005
Oh, there it is, the trump card.
You've got kids!
583
00:42:36,005 --> 00:42:38,885
Congratulations
on utilising your womb.
584
00:42:38,885 --> 00:42:41,605
You know, anyone would think
I had an easy life.
585
00:42:41,605 --> 00:42:42,885
Look, I never said that.
586
00:42:42,885 --> 00:42:47,045
You just think that I swanned off,
that my life was a bed of roses.
587
00:42:47,045 --> 00:42:48,485
You had everything.
588
00:42:48,485 --> 00:42:51,435
Everything was about you
when I was younger.
589
00:42:51,444 --> 00:42:54,204
No! I was sick. That's a given.
590
00:42:54,204 --> 00:42:56,924
But everything
was about you and Mum,
591
00:42:56,924 --> 00:42:58,484
your relationship.
592
00:42:58,484 --> 00:43:00,444
You used to whisper behind my back.
593
00:43:00,444 --> 00:43:03,644
No, she used to whisper to me
behind your back,
594
00:43:03,644 --> 00:43:06,524
because she didn't want
to upset you.
595
00:43:06,524 --> 00:43:08,124
I was 14!
596
00:43:08,124 --> 00:43:11,524
You loved it, being her favourite!
How was I her favourite?!
597
00:43:11,524 --> 00:43:13,444
You took
that bloody coffee bean necklace...
598
00:43:13,444 --> 00:43:15,564
Oh, my God!
..because you feel entitled to it.
599
00:43:15,564 --> 00:43:18,084
Have it. I don't want it. What,
you're throwing that in my face?
600
00:43:18,084 --> 00:43:19,644
And the minute
an affair's mentioned,
601
00:43:19,644 --> 00:43:21,004
you throw that in MY face.
602
00:43:21,004 --> 00:43:23,604
Because you think that I'm like Mum,
and I'm not. You are.
603
00:43:23,604 --> 00:43:25,804
Well, you might be right there,
cos this conversation
604
00:43:25,803 --> 00:43:27,323
is making me want
to kill myself!
605
00:43:39,963 --> 00:43:41,803
You know what?
You're gonna hear this.
606
00:43:43,643 --> 00:43:45,163
I wasn't her favourite. You were.
607
00:43:46,523 --> 00:43:49,043
Your life wasn't derailed,
but mine was,
608
00:43:49,043 --> 00:43:51,443
because you got to leave home at 18
609
00:43:51,443 --> 00:43:54,083
when she had
a full-on nervous breakdown.
610
00:43:55,243 --> 00:43:57,483
She didn't get out of bed
for months.
611
00:43:57,483 --> 00:44:00,203
Do you know how hard it is
to section someone?
612
00:44:00,203 --> 00:44:02,763
Mm? It's hard.
613
00:44:02,762 --> 00:44:05,482
Because she's not quite
a danger to herself,
614
00:44:05,482 --> 00:44:07,602
but she's pretty edgy all the same.
615
00:44:09,242 --> 00:44:11,082
I didn't know.
No, I know you didn't,
616
00:44:11,082 --> 00:44:12,602
because I wasn't allowed
to tell you,
617
00:44:12,602 --> 00:44:16,162
because you'd just got better
and you'd just gone to university,
618
00:44:16,162 --> 00:44:18,042
so I had to look after her.
619
00:44:19,562 --> 00:44:23,282
But what about Dad?
What about Dad?
620
00:44:25,722 --> 00:44:28,522
Did his best, but he...
621
00:44:28,522 --> 00:44:30,122
he had to go to work
and pay the mortgage.
622
00:44:30,122 --> 00:44:32,682
So I dropped out of college.
623
00:44:32,682 --> 00:44:35,322
No. You dropped out of college
to be with Jim.
624
00:44:35,322 --> 00:44:40,122
No. I got with Jim
BECAUSE I left college.
625
00:44:40,121 --> 00:44:42,521
No, no. You loved Jim.
Yes.
626
00:44:42,521 --> 00:44:45,321
But I could have loved
someone else.
627
00:44:45,321 --> 00:44:47,921
I could have loved SOMEWHERE else.
628
00:44:57,801 --> 00:45:00,201
I didn't know about any of this.
629
00:45:01,561 --> 00:45:02,801
Well, now you do.
630
00:45:10,720 --> 00:45:11,920
How bad was Mum?
631
00:45:18,880 --> 00:45:21,080
She was bad enough
to do something stupid.
632
00:45:22,160 --> 00:45:23,240
But she didn't...
633
00:45:25,160 --> 00:45:27,600
..because I was there,
and I could stop her.
634
00:45:31,120 --> 00:45:33,240
But I couldn't this time,
and now she's...46257
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