All language subtitles for The Dukes of Hazzard S02E25 Carnival of Thrills Pt 2_track3_[eng]

On "The Dukes,"
a carnival of thrills

invades Hazzard County

which is nothing
new to the Dukes.

You're just lucky that we're in
Uncle Jesse's house, that's all.

We can always step outside.

We need a top stunt driver
to make a 32-car jump.

Ooh!

Judgment Day is nigh!

[Waylon Jennings
singing "Good Ol' Boys"]

♪ Just-a good ol' boys ♪

♪ Never meaning no harm ♪

♪ Beats all you never saw ♪

♪ Been in trouble
with the law ♪

♪ Since the day they was born ♪

♪ Straightenin' the curves ♪

♪ Flattenin' the hills ♪

♪ Someday the mountain
might get 'em ♪

♪ But the law never will ♪

♪ Makin' their way ♪

♪ The only way they know how ♪

♪ Well that's just
a little bit more ♪

♪ Than the law will allow ♪

♪ Just-a good ol' boys ♪

♪ They wouldn't change
if they could ♪

♪ Fightin' the system like
a two modern-day Robin Hoods ♪

♪ Yee-haw ♪♪

Now, this here's a love story.

Love between men and women

and men and cars.

It takes place
in Hazzard County.

Oh, I just can't
wait to get there!

I just love these
automobile thrill-shows.

I don't see why
we're wasting our money

to go over there
when we've got Bo here

to put on a show
of his own.

Welcome
to the Carnival of Thrills.

It's a little daredevil show
that hits

a lot of small towns
in the South

and draws a lot
of local leadfoots

like bees to honey.

And this here, is the little
honey that runs the show.

'Ladies and gentlemen'

'in just a few moments'

'the Carnival of Thrills
will present'

'its
most death-defying attraction.'

The crowd sounds like
they're really with you today.

You're gonna be dynamite.

'Alright, everybody!
Clear the track!'

'We don't want
anybody to get hurt.'

Can you move in here
just enough for four people?

- Thank you so much.
- Thanks a lot.

- Excuse us.
- Don't worry about it.

- Here we go. Alright.
- It should be.

'And now, The Carnival
of Thrills presents'

the main attraction
of this afternoon's performance.

A death-defying leap

over 32parked vehicles

'in the center of the arena.'

'And I'd like to present
the star of our show'

'Mr. Bob Dexter!
Let's hear it for him, folks!'

- Great. I feel great.

Well,
go do it, boy!

How about
a little kiss for good luck?

- Alright!
- Alright.

- Yeah!
- Woo-hoo!

That's the best part
about this job.

Getting that kind
of attention from the owner.

'Now, that's what I call
enough inspiration'

'to make a man able'

'to jump clear
out of this arena.'

'And this is it, folks'

'the moment you've
all been waiting for.'

'If some of you
lady folks out there'

'are too scared to watch'

'you better hide your eyes
on your boyfriend's shoulder'

'till it's all over,
you ready, Bob?'

'See if this one'll make your
hair stand right upon end.'

'So, settle back,
keep your fingers crossed'

'and your eyes glued
to the excitement.'

'He's losing power, Bo!'

- Oh!
- Alright, take it easy.

They'll take care of it.

'The fire crew will have
everything under control'

'in a just few moments.'

'He's getting out of
the passenger side of the car.'

'Bob's okay!'

- He'll be alright.

Ladies and gentlemen

I'm happy to say, things
aren't as bad as they look.

Bob'll be just fine.
Thank you.

What went wrong?

Lost his nerve
at the last second.

Carl, every stunt driver
isn't like you.

Forget about the past.

Start worrying
about the future.

'Where are we gonna
find another sucker'

to make the Leap for Life
when we get to Hazzard?

That's not till next week.

Believe me, I'll find
some local country-boy

begging for the chance by then.

Life in Hazzard ain't all
chasing cars and women.

Running a farm
is a lot of hard work.

But they do take
a few breaks.

- Hey, Bo.

Hi, fellas!

Hey, you reckon she chased us
all the way from Cedar City?

I told you, we should've
paid for them tickets

instead of jumping
the fence.

Hey there, little lady!

How you doing?

Looks like pretty hard work.

Oh, yeah,
but it's worth it.

You'd be surprised how many
pretty little ladies

we meet this way.

Thanks, I'm looking
for the owner

of the local fairgrounds,
Mr. JD Hogg.

Know where I can find him?

Well, if he ain't
out foreclosing

some poor widow's mortgage

or, uh , short-changing
the customers down at the bank.

You'll probably find him
over at the Boar's Nest

skimming the take
and watering down the liquor.

Yeah, you can't miss it,
you go down here to Highway 7

and you take yourself a left

and it's the first Boar's Nest
on the right.

There you go.

- Thanks.
- Yeah.

Hope I see you
again some time.

Hope you see me again
sometime, too.

Bye-bye!

Take it easy now!

Whoo! Cousin,
that is one prettylady.

Yeah, I know just
what you're thinking.

Now, let's...stop
your daydreaming.

Let's get back to work.

'Alright, let's see now.'

That's, uh, two days rental
of my fairgrounds

at $525 a day

'and your carnival permit'

'your county license fee'

and your interest,
and your sales tax

and your et cetera,
and your et cetera

your et cetera.

And that comes
to a grand total of $3,797.53.

Here, j-just like I said.

Good, oh, good,
I'm proud of you, li'l buddy.

I hope you don't mind taking
a post-dated check, Mr. Hogg.

Are you kidding, lady?

'The boss taking
a post'

That's about as likely
as a pig laying eggs.

Hey, Rosco, you hush
now, will you?

Oh, it was
nothing personal, I was just--

Well, Ms. Benson,
I ordinarily don't

accept post-dated checks

'but I'll tell you
what I will do.'

I will take a
promissory note

for your rental
on the fairgrounds.

Uh, payable in full
on the last performance.

How about that?

Well, now, what have
we got to lose?

Yeah, just sign right there
on the dotted line.

Uh, yeah, just, you just sign
right there on that dotted line

and just...yeah.

Well, you're very
understanding, Mr. Hogg.

Thank you.

We'll see you
after the show on Saturday.

- That's a good idea.
- Thank you.

- Nice to have met y'all.
- Yeah.

- So long.
- Bye, now.

- Bye.
- Bye. Have a good show.

Yeah, have a, have a,
have a nice one.

Boss, can I ask you
something?

Yeah, what?

Why would you extend credit
to those carnival people

when you know they ain't got
a dime in their jeans?

Alright, I'll tell you.

Because that's the best time
to extend credit

to anybody, cowbell.

Ooh.

You see something

that lady ain't never
gonna sell enough tickets

to pay the rent
on the fairgrounds

what, with her
star attraction laid up

in the hospital,
back in Cedar City.

Ooh, no.

You see, that promissory note
she signed

pledges allthe show's property
as collateral.

And if she can't
pay the rent

why, all I gotta
do is foreclose

and the whole shebang,
the whole Carnival of Thrills

is mine for five cents
on the dollar.

Subject left the office
of Country Commissioner JD Hogg

at precisely 5:00 p.m.

Continuing surveillance.

JD Hogg's
Carnival of Thrills.

Thrills!

- I'll be the talk of showbiz.
- Yeah, yeah.

- I sure will.
- Yeah, yeah.

Have my picture plastered

all over the place.

Plastered!

Of course, ahem.

I will have to take off
a pound or two.

Uh, slim down
for my TV image.

Oh, now, Boss, I don't think
you have to worry about that

because your TV image'll fit

on any TV set
in Hazzard County

Yeah.

as long as it's
an extra-wide set.

- Yeah. Humph.
- Well, it's just--

Alright, Rosco,
on your way out

you give this bottle
to the bartender

and tell him to sell it
to one of the customers.

But tell him to do it quick
before it loses its fizz

because we don't want
to cheat nobody now, do we?

Ooh, no. Oh, good!
Ooh, the fizz!

Yeah!

'Easy now. Take it
easy with those cars.'

Well, now that you
rented the fairgrounds

you're gonna have
to find some sucker

to fill it,
for the Leap for Life.

I told you,
that won't be a problem.

Well, it never is,
is it?

Just make a play
for some local yokel

who'll draw
the home crowd

flash those
baby blues on him

tell him
he's got charisma.

And before you know it,
he'll be trying

to jump 50 cars,
he's so flipped out over me.

Well, it worked
on me, didn't it?

After your daddy
crashed, you inherited

the show
without a star attraction.

It took you about three weeks
to convince me

I was the greatest
thing on wheels.

Took you about that long
to replace me

after I crashed,
didn't it?

You never got over that,
did you, Carl?

Well, darling,
it's kinda hard

with this busted-up knee
of mine.

It's not my fault
you weren't as good

as you thought
you were.

I'm still the best
driver you've ever had.

Correction.
You werethe best.

During the next few days

half of Hazzard County
was covered

with posters advertising
the big race.

Easiest 100 bucks
we'll ever make.

- You got it.
- Alright!

Diane knew that every
leadfoot in Hazzard

would be itching to get his hands on that prize money.

And somewhere
in that local talent

she just might find
the driver that she needed

to get the show
back on its feet again.

- And one belt ought to do it.
- Uh, much obliged, Cooter.

Now, gentlemen, there
is the small matter of the--

- Uh, the bill!
- The bill.

Yeah, the bill,
well, uh..

Hey, hey, why don't we talk
about it next month?

Uh-uh! That's what
you said last month.

Well, we're talking
about it, ain't we?

Got a customer.

Howdy.

Oh, hey,
listen, darlin'

we gotta stop
meeting like this.

People might start to talk.

- They might.

I was wondering if you'd hang
these posters up in your garage.

Yes, ma'am,
you can hang anything

you want to
in my garage.

You boys figure
on entering the race?

No, we're figuring
on winning it.

As soon as they can pay me

the money they owe
me for these parts.

Now, hold on.

As a matter, why don't
you just pay me

and eliminate
the middleman?

You seem awfully confident.

Shoot fire, ma'am, you ain't
seen these boys drive.

Well, I'm looking
forward to it.

Yeah.

See you at the fairgrounds.

Yeah.

You sure will.

Hey, boss..

Hmm..

Boss, you look like
a steamed clam.

Better turn this heat
down a little bit.

Now, where'd you get
your brains, in a thrift shop?

How do you expect me
to lose the pounds

I have to, if you lower
that temperature?

Uh, you know that carnival..

You know, they're gonna
have a road race for publicity

and those Duke boys,
they've entered it

and they might win,
and if they do

half of Hazzard County's
gonna turn out

just to watch 'em
pick up the prize money.

Well, you just
better make sure

they don'twin,
you hear me?

'You just stop them Duke boys'

or else, I'm gonna divorce
your fair sister

'and make her move
back in with you.'

Ooh, no, no, no--

You hear me now?

Mmh, mmh, mmh! Ow!
Rosco, you cow chip!

I said I wanted to sweat

not melt!

And the next day

the cream
of the Hazzard leadfoots

were all bunched and ready.

Alright, you've all got
your layouts of the course.

Start on the track

go once
around the figure eight

out the stadium,
to the marker and back.

The winner will receive
his prize money

at the performance
on Saturday, and who knows

we might even throw in
a little extra added-bonus

like a full-time job
with the show.

Alright, fellas,
hit those pedals!

Hey, Luke, Bo, you take
it easy on these fellas.

I just might want
to date one someday.

- Okay.
- Good luck, y'all!

Not that you'll need it

but here's a little
something for good luck.

Bo, you best
make up your mind

whether you're
courting or driving

or it's liable to be
embarrassing for the both of us.

Alright, y'all,
let's clear the track now.

Clear the track
on both sides.

Gentlemen,
start your engines!

Woo-hoo!

Look out! Hang on, Luke!

Well, that's one out.

That's Tommy Lee. He ain't
lucky with women, either.

We may have just found
ourselves a new stunt driver.

Well, maybe. Let's see
how he finishes out this race.

Hey, that's it! Whoo!

Old Toby is really in trouble.

His daddy don't know
he's got the car.

That's daddy's shirt, too.

Ooh, ooh, uh..

Uh, Boss, this is
Sheriff Rosco P Coltrane.

'The pigeons just flew
out of the nest.'

'Come back.'

Pigeons, huh?

Well, you're just the cuckoo
to run them down. Over.

Ooh, ooh, uh,
don't worry, boss.

I'll be on them like a-a-a
buzzard is on a worm.

Yep, yep, well, you better
fly, vulture, fly

or else you're gonna
wind up a dead duck.

I told you
I could pick 'em.

He's making a joke
out of this race.

Yep. If he doesn't get a one-way
ride to the county jail.

Hey, what's Rosco
doing in there?

Breaker, breaker,
to all racers.

Looks like
we picked up a fourth.

One Rosco P Coltrane.

Now, let's split
at the crossroads.

I doubt if he can follow
all of us at once.

'10-4, Luke.
We'll turn right here.'

Ooh, I know you'd
do that, you rascals.

'I'm just,
I'm serious now.'

'You gonna mess
with the man..'

'You, you're messing
with the man.'

You boys might as well give up

'cause I'm gonna
stick to your tail

like hot butter
on a corn cob.

That's the first bit of truth
I've ever heard himsay.

Let's see if he
can jump over this.

Come on, Rosco! Yee-haw!

When we get back

we'll see if old Rosco's

had time to build a nest.

Ooh! Ooh, ooh!

That smarts.

Well, he's some driver,
ain't he, Bo?

You boys'll shape up

when I put you
in the slammer for speeding!

Rosco, you're wrong again.

We happen to be sitting
on private property.

You can't kick us here.

If you're so dead set
on arresting somebody though

you ought to run yourself in.

You're trespassing
on Jeb Tompkins' land.

He ain't never lost
too much love for you.

- Let's hit it.
- You, oh!

Hazzard drivers may be crazy

but they're good
sportsmen too.

They gave Bo and Luke back
the position they had

before old Rosco
had joined the race.

Whoo!

I told you my cousins
were hot drivers.

I bet that's not all
they're good at.

Woo-hoo!

Oh, that was fantastic! Oh!

God, I'm proud
of you! Give me a hug!

Woo-hoo!

Congratulations.

Aw, shoot,
it weren't nothin'.

Now, about that job
with the show I mentioned.

We need a top stunt driver
to make a 32-car jump.

32 cars, man'll have
to be a dang fool

to even thinkabout doing
something like that.

'Yeah, that's assuming
he had something'

to think with,
in the first place.

N-Now wait a minute, Luke,
I think we can make it.

Bo, don't you remember
what happened

to the guy that tried it
over there in Cedar City?

You always let other people
do your talking for you?

W-Well, no, ma'am--

You really think you're good
enough to make that jump?

With my eyes closed.

But my stunt-driving days
is gonna end

after y'all pay me
that money on Saturday.

I see. Well,
why wait that long?

Carl, why don't you
pay this chicken off.

- My pleasure.

Hey, hey, hold it, Hoss.
Now, listen, wait a minute.

You sure are
a pretty little lady

but I don't take kindly to being
called chicken by nobody.

Take it easy, Bo.

Who are you,
his baby

I just thought
that maybe for once

I'd found myself
a real man.

Well, lady, maybe
for once, you have.

Carl, you just put
that money away

till after I make
that jump on Saturday.

Bo, you can't do that!

It's something we're gonna have
to find out now, isn't it?

Then maybe me
and the little lady here

will have something nice
to talk about.

Bye, now.

You know, I've been wondering

when that fella was
gonna show up again.

Meanwhile, Uncle Jesse
spent all morning

preparing
the victory celebration.

Mmm-mmm-mmm!

Will you smell that?

Now, that there's
the best crawdad bisque

I ever did make.

I'm liable to have
to charge you $100

of your prize money
just for a bowl.

Well, you better pour
it back in the pot then.

My rich cousin
turned down the prize money.

Oh, why would you do
a foolish thing like that?

So he can do something
more stupid on Saturday.

Like jumping
over 32 parked cars.

32. Now, how you
plan to do that?

You gonna get an airplane

'or you just gonna let Maudine
the mule kick you over?'

Uncle Jesse, look,
with the right ramp

theGeneralcan do it
with his eyes closed.

And besides, Diane's gonna
give me an extra 150 bucks.

So we have more to spend
on your funeral, huh?

Daisy, there ain't
gonna be no funeral.

Besides, I ain't just doing
it for the money, anyway.

Then it's gotta be
that girl.

Bo Duke, I never thought
I'd see you running around

acting like a love-starved calf
at feeding time.

Daisy, Diane ain't got
nothing to do with this.

Uh-huh.

Well, now,
i-i-if it ain't money

and it ain't love

and the three of us
know it ain't brains.

'Why in the world
you doin' it?'

Well, you think
it's funny, huh, Luke?

Well, I'm doing
it so you and me

can build up
a big enough reputation

to get
on the NASCAR circuit, is all.

It's just something
we've been dreaming about

'since we's knee-high
to a grasshopper.'

Bo, the boys
on that NASCAR circuit

are the safest, steadiest
drivers in the world.

Now, the last thing they want
on that track with them

is some carnival hotshot

with a lead foot
and a brain to match.

Luke, you got no right
to tell me--

Now, just a minute!
Bo! Bo! Sit down.

You know I don't allow
no arguing at my table.

Now, you just sit
over there, Daisy.

Now..

...simmer down.

Dear Lord,
we thank Thee

for this bounteous table,
and..

Now, who in the world
would interrupt a man

when he's talking
to his Almighty?

Uh, uh, amen. Get that.

Yes, sir.

- Driving me nuts.

'I hope I'm not interrupting
anything important.'

Oh, no, ma'am.

Uh, me and my family
just having a little

friendly family discussion
is all.

I just thought we should
get our relationship

started off on the right foot
as soon as possible.

Uh, well, yes.
Sure-Sure thing, Diane.

Why don't you
make that "Partner"?

Think you could
meet me here at my RV

by 1 o'clock for lunch?

Uh, 1 o'clock? W-Well, yeah.

W-Well, if it's for business.
I guess I have to be there, huh?

I'll be looking
forward to it.

And, Bo, if you get here
a little bit early

don't bother to knock.

Your-Your crawdads
is gettin' cold.

Um, listen,
Uncle Jesse, uh..

...I-I gotta run,
I-I gotta run.

Right now, after
Uncle Jesse spent all morning

cooking up these
vittles for you?

- 'Bo..'
- Daisy, I know, but..

Well, listen, Uncle Jesse,
I wouldn't do nothing

to hurt you, but this
here is business.

Business?

Since when you been so
all

Now, just simmer down
a li'l bit, Luke.

Uh, listen, if Bo's gotta go

and if it's
for business reasons.

Well, then he's got to go.
Go ahead on. This'll keep.

Thanks a lot,
Uncle Jesse.

Hey, Bo, take my jeep.

Well, what's wrong
with General Lee?

Nothing, I hope.

But if you plan
on jumping him

over 32 parked cars

I'm gonna take him
over to Cooter's

and check the timing.

Thanks a lot, y'all. Bye-bye.

And I'm gonna
have him check

my checking
of the timing

and then I'm gonna
check his checking

of my checking
of the timing--

And I'm gonna
check you both.

'Bo?'

Uh, yeah. Yeah, it's me.

Hey, you told
me not to knock

and I never disobey
a direct order from the boss.

Good.

You can start by opening
the champagne.

Yeah.

Champagne, huh?

Um, y-you see, we don't,
we don't get

much champagne in Hazzard.

'Now, get those rigs
blocked off together.'

'I want plenty of room
for those bikes to practice.'

Hey.

There you go.

Alright.

Um, t-to the carnival.

And to us.

Alright.

The show was still
a few days away

and the box office was humming and selling tickets

like it was
to the Second Coming.

No leaping for life.

At the Boar's Nest,
old Boss Hogg

was pulling out
all the stops

and a few muscles, too

to improve the TV image that
he thought he'd be a-needin'.

Bad news, boss, bad news.

Listen, I don't
mean to interrupt

your amphibious landing--

Rosco, I can't hear what
you're saying. Come closer.

Well, it's-it's Bo Duke.

I can't hear you.
Stop whispering. Speak up.

- Uh, Bo Duke!
- Ah, yeah!

You know, he's gonna make
that 32-car jump, Boss.

I know all about this.

Well, did you know
that the tickets

are selling
like wildfire?

- Uh-huh.

Well, you better
put out that wildfire

before they sell
enough tickets

to pay the rental
on the Fairgrounds

and keep me from taking
that show away from them.

Okay, well,
I-I'll do that.

I'll get on it like a
chicken on a worm sandwich.

Uh, oh, just one thing, boss.
How am I supposed to do that?

- Well, use your brain.
- Oh.

You got one.

Bo Duke can't make
that jump

without that orange car
of his.

- Oh, the General Lee.
- Yeah, the General Lee.

So, steal it, wreck it,
confiscate it, whatever.

- Oh! Ooh, ooh, ooh.
- Ooh, ooh.

You hit your head on my gun
there, didn't you, li'l buddy?

Listen, I'm sorry
about that.

I bet that smarts,
don't it?

Yeah, what would you
know about smarts?

Just get that vehicle,
day or night, rain or shine

legal or otherwise,
just get it, will you?

I'll get it,
now, listen, I'm sorry

about that boo-boo
up there.

That ain't nothing
compared to the boo-boo

I got for a sheriff,
now get!

Oh, I'm going.

Land ho!

Does that
sound right to you?

Couldn't have done her
much better myself.

Shoot.

Hop in.

- Hey, Lucas, I got an idea.

Why don't you lay
this old boy just flat out

and let's see what
it'll do.

Your wish, mydream.

There they go
and here I come.

Well, Luke Duke, you ain't
shakin' me like that.

Al..

Alright, you boys
in theGeneral Lee

you just pull on over,
this is the law speaking.

Well, I do believe
I hear the golden tones

of one Rosco P Coltrane.

He picked the wrong day
to play catch.

Friends, it looks
like old General Lee

better be pulling some
pretty slick maneuvers.

Look out!

Ooh, ooh!

Alright, I've got you!

Now, Rosco,
correct me if I'm wrong

but ain't there
some sort of law

against tailgating
in this county?

I was not tailgating.

What I was do,
I was in hot pursuit

of two potential violators

of the vehicle code,
that's what I was.

Now, we wasn't even
going 55.

That's right. That's not
what I'm getting you for.

You see, what I'm
getting you for

is a busted tail-light.

Because anybody
with a busted tail-light

is definitely a hazard to any
citizen in Hazzard County

so, I'm gonna have
to impound this vehicle.

But, Rosco,
that tail light ain't busted.

Uh, you know, uh..

'It is now.'

Rosco, you gotta
be out of your mind

treating people's
property like that.

We ain't no dogs.
What do you think--

Now, hold on a second.
Hold on.

Don't you threaten me.

- Yeah, get me off of him.
- Easy.

Just settle down.
I'm surprised at you.

Talking back
to Rosco like that, huh?

Now, he's got a point.

As long as he's got
a busted tail-light

theGeneralis a hazard
to public safety.

He ought to be impounded.

- He ought to.

- Well, yes.
- But he busted it.

Now, that's
beside the point.

That's beside the point.

He's done everybody
a big favor.

I'm much obliged,
Rosco. Thanks a lot.

Well, that's something.
I'll take it.

I'm gonna i-impound it,
you know.

Yep.

You mean you don't..

See, l-listen..

You-you're-you're lucky
you're needed around here.

I could throw you
in the slammer.

What Luke didn't know
was that old Boss

had other things in mind
for the General.

That's a beautiful
sight, ain't it, Rosco?

Oh, it's beautiful,
beautiful.

All them rolling eyesores
on the way to recycling.

Why, the next time
them Duke boys

pop open a can of beer

the very can
they're drinking out of

might just be
a reincarnation

of the right front fender
of their car.

I love it,
I love it.

You sure you want
to do this, Mr. Hogg?

I mean there ain't nothing
wrong withGeneral Lee

except a little old
$2.00 tail-light glass.

Enos, a broken tail-light
means a moving menace

to the citizens
of Hazzard County.

Well, at least can't we make

a little old phone call
to Bo first?

Enos, will you get in the cab

of that car carrier with Waldo?

And I don't want to see
hide or hair of you

until that orange clunker
has been squished small enough

to fit
into that itty-bitty space

between your ears.

- 'Now, get.'
- Yes, sir.

Yee-hee!

Bye.

Alright.

You sure don't care much
about expenses, do you?

Using my best show car
for your first trial practice?

Well, shoot, this here
is the only one

with as much horsepower
as theGeneral.

I'm gonna need it
to make that jump.

Besides, I won't even
scratch the paint.

In that case,
be my guest.

Alright.

Okay!

Oh, boy.

Whoo!

Sweetheart, I'm gonna need

at least another 100 feet
in front of that ramp

before I'm even gonna make
that big jump with theGeneral.

You sure you've never done
any stunt driving before?

Oh, well, I fool around
with cars a little bit.

You've got it down
to a science.

I've never seen anyone take
to this kind of thing so fast.

Well, cars ain't the only
thing I take to quick.

Good. I like
that even better.

Incidentally,
we've got an extra RV

in case you want to move
a little closer to your work.

Well, sweetheart, I just
might take you up on that.

Now, I better go see how
Cooter and Luke are doing

on theGeneral Lee,or I ain't
never gonna get out of here.

Don't you think you're
spreading it a little too thick?

Hardly. He's the best stunt
driver we've ever come across.

Second best, maybe.

Present company included.

If Bo works out
the way I think he will

we'll be a cinch to land
the State Fair Circuit.

Just like my daddy
always hoped we would.

Well, don't be taking
that new kid too serious.

Carl, I'll take him
as seriously as I have to.

We need a new star

and Bo will do until someone
better comes along

which I don't think
is very likely to happen.

While Bo was
heading for the garage

to meet Luke and Cooter

theGeneral was heading
for the crusher

and none of them boys
knew a thing about it.

Hey, Bo! You're
just in time for lunch.

Oh, shoot, I'd love to,
Daisy, but, uh..

...I already had a little
something at the fairgrounds.

Hey, y'all are eating lunch
when you're supposed to be

tuning up theGeneral,
what's going on?

Oh, uh, we finished
that a couple hours ago.

And according
to these fellows

he's running better
than ever, Bo.

Well, alright.

Uh, I don't see him outside
nowhere. Where'd y'all put him?

Well, he had
one small problem

has a busted tail-light

and even though Rosco
kicked it out himself

he saw fit to have theGeneral
towed off to the impound yard.

Knowing Rosco,
it could be anywhere.

Shepherd to Lost Sheep.
Shepherd to Lost Sheep.

'This is your Uncle Jesse.'

You better be listening,
'cause Judgment Day is nigh.

'You got your ears on?'

Praise, Cooter
coming at you.

Which one of them sheeps
you want to talk at

Uncle Shepherd, come on.

I-I'm looking for all of 'em.

A car carrier just passed me
at Willow Creek Road.

And it was loaded
with clunkers

including theGeneral Lee

'headed right
for the junkyard'

'and Enos was sitting
up front with the driver'

just as pleased as punch.

Enos makes it official.

Give me that. We'll be
right on it, Uncle Jesse.

They must be headed
for the crusher.

I hope you're real,
real proud of yourself, Luke.

'TheGeneral'sprobably
gonna get crushed'

all because you want to keep
me from making that jump!

Bo, you got it half right.

Now, I admit I let
the General be impounded

to save your neck.

I only figured
on letting them hold it

till it's too late
to make the jump.

And I say amen to that,
and you would, too

if you weren't
so crazy in love.

Cooter, will you quit
siding with him--

Now, look, it don't
do no good to argue.

'We might still have
time to stop them.'

How? That car carrier's halfway
to the crusher right now.

Now, we'll just
take a short cut.

Got a 4-wheel drive here
I just tuned up.

You drive it, I'll
ride shotgun. Let's go.

Cooter always gets shotgun.

That crusher's
got almost as big a appetite

as old Boss Hogg.

But I reckon General Lee's
gonna wind up dessert.

Ain't it funny how you can get

emotionally attached to a car?

- Hi, Luke!
- Alright, hold on a second.

Now, here's the impound money.
Now, put that car down.

No way, Jose.
Boss Hogg's order.

Wait a minute!
Hey, hold on!

Enos!

Enos!

Come on!
Come on, Enos.

Wake up, Enos.

If this don't wake you up,
nothing will, honey.

- Eating time.
- 'Oh.'

Hey, take a gander
at that poster

I got up there
on the wall.

I had it redesigned.

See the fellow
up at the top?

Ooh.

'That's gonna be the new me.'

'Boy, it is amazing, boss,
what dieting and willpower'

'will do for a man's body.'

Yeah. Willpower!

One, two, three, four

five, six, seven,
eight, nine, ten.

I hope you'll forgive me
for counting a spell

before doing my duty but it's

the only way
I could think of being loyal

to my friends
and my job both.

Thank you.

Sheriff, this is
Deputy Strate at the crusher.

It's Enos.

Enos, do you know
that it's chow time?

Will you call back in
about an hour, hour and a half?

'Over.'

But, Sheriff, uh,
the Duke boys and Cooter

just grabbed theGeneral Lee
from the crusher.

From the crusher?

Well, what are they
gonna use it for now

an oversized paperweight?

Oversized paperweight?

Well, I hate
to disappoint you, Mr. Hogg

but last time
I sawGeneral

it was flat,
getting it on all eight.

You mean they stole it
right out of that junkyard?

Well, not exactly,
they offered the impound fee

but that foreman just knocked
it clean out of Luke's hand.

Oh, ho! Good, good.

Without acceptance
of the impound money

that car still belongs
to Hazzard County.

Which means, we got
Bo and Luke Duke

on a charge
of grand theft auto.

Grand theft auto!

You hear that, Enos?
Over and out!

And out!

And...eating.

No, oh..

Ooh, looky there!

Oh, no, no, boss.
Naughty, naughty.

You see,
this one is mine.

See, this one is roast beef,
chicken, salami

sardine, liverwurst,
ham, lettuce, and tomato

and avocado on sourdough.

- This one is yours.
- Yeah.

Uh, that one is lettuce.

Hold the roast beef,
chicken, salami

sardine, liverwurst,
ham, lettuce, tomato

on sourdough.

Well, from the sound
of theGeneral

she sounds all rescued
and raring to go.

Yeah, no thanks to Luke.

The Generalgot impounded
and Luke here

didn't even lift a finger
to help him out.

Well, that may be so,
but it seems to me

that I was the one who
persuaded that crane operator

not to turn theGeneral
into a door stop.

Now cool it, you two.

Oh, Uncle Jesse, they been
carrying on like this

ever since
we left the crusher.

Whose fault is that?

It was himwho got
us into all this mess

just because some lady
made a pass at him.

You know, I believe my cousin's
just a little bit jealous.

'Cause, number one,
he knows that I'm the only one

in this whole dang county
that can make that jump

including himself.

And also,
he's a little bit upset

because
that pretty little filly's

fallen in love
with me and not him.

Now, look, I can understand
her falling in love

with either one
of you fellows.

Any girl in Hazzard County

would want to go out
with either one of you.

You know that. And heck,
if I wasn't your cousin--

Now, Daisy, look,
I'll be the first to admit

that Bo here, has
got a pretty face.

I just wish he had
the brains to match.

Now, Luke, what the heck
is that supposed to mean?

Bo, the lady's been around.

She's run
into hundreds of guys.

Now, why is she
making a play

for a country boy
like you

unless she got an angle?

Now, listen, you two.
I said "Cool it."

No, Uncle Jesse.
Let him talk.

Now, listen, Luke,
what makes you think I can't

give her something
she needs, huh?

Well, sure!

An amateur driver
to do a crazy stunt

that damn near
killed the last guy.

Or ain't it ever
occurred to you

that she might be
playing you for a sucker?

Listen, Luke, I don't
have to take that from you.

I don't have to take
that from anybody.

You're just lucky that we're in
Uncle Jesse's house, that's all!

You're unlucky, 'cause
we can always step outside.

Well, there's the door, cousin.

You go first.

Them two are big enough
to hurt each other.

Yep.

Now, boys..

Boys, now,
j-just simmer down

before you do something you'll
regret the rest of your life.

Uncle Jesse, I ain't
got no regrets about nothing.

Especially not this.

I sure wish we didn't
have to stop here.

Now, we're gonna have to wait
for this feud to fester

before we're gonna
see how it comes out.

'Them Dukes! Them Dukes!'