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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,037 --> 00:00:05,605 [THEME MUSIC PLAYING] 2 00:01:08,168 --> 00:01:10,170 [LAUGHS] 3 00:01:19,913 --> 00:01:22,415 EARTHQUAKE! EARTHQUAKE! 4 00:01:22,415 --> 00:01:24,917 DARLENE, KNOCK IT OFF. 5 00:01:24,918 --> 00:01:26,419 GOOD AFTERNOON. THIS IS ROSEANNE 6 00:01:26,419 --> 00:01:28,487 AT THE MAGAZINE DISCOUNT HOUSE. 7 00:01:28,488 --> 00:01:30,556 MOM'S TRYING TO WORK! 8 00:01:30,557 --> 00:01:31,558 SO. I WORKED TODAY, TOO. 9 00:01:31,558 --> 00:01:33,560 SHH! DON'T SHUSH ME. 10 00:01:33,560 --> 00:01:35,562 D.J., DON'T MAKE ME KILL YOU. 11 00:01:35,562 --> 00:01:37,564 ...THAN WHAT YOU FIND AT THE NEWSSTANDS. 12 00:01:37,564 --> 00:01:39,065 [MUFFLED SHOUTING] 13 00:01:39,065 --> 00:01:40,566 OH! I'M NOT INTERESTED EITHER, 14 00:01:40,567 --> 00:01:41,935 BUT IT'S MY JOB. 15 00:01:44,337 --> 00:01:45,838 DARLENE, WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM? 16 00:01:45,839 --> 00:01:46,840 I'M HUNGRY. 17 00:01:46,840 --> 00:01:48,341 WELL, DINNER AIN'T READY YET. 18 00:01:48,341 --> 00:01:49,842 I'M HUNGRY NOW. 19 00:01:49,843 --> 00:01:50,844 WELL, HERE. START ON THIS. 20 00:01:50,844 --> 00:01:55,148 I HEAR FLEECE IS VERY HIGH IN FIBER. 21 00:01:55,148 --> 00:01:56,649 MOMMY, DIAL THE NEXT NUMBER? 22 00:01:56,649 --> 00:01:58,150 HIT IT, PARTNER. 23 00:01:58,151 --> 00:02:00,553 DOESN'T ANYONE WANT TO HEAR ABOUT MY DAY? 24 00:02:00,553 --> 00:02:01,887 NO. 25 00:02:01,888 --> 00:02:04,090 GOOD PARENTING. 26 00:02:04,090 --> 00:02:05,658 WHERE ARE THE COOKIES? 27 00:02:05,658 --> 00:02:07,059 PROBABLY UNDER YOUR BED. 28 00:02:07,060 --> 00:02:08,628 OH, YEAH. 29 00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:13,733 HELLO. MY MOM WOULD LIKE TO TALK TO YOU. 30 00:02:13,733 --> 00:02:17,303 GOOD AFTERNOON. THIS IS MAGAZINE AT THE ROSE-- 31 00:02:19,372 --> 00:02:21,040 HEY, BABE, HOW'S IT GOING? 32 00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:23,008 DEATH. DEATH. 33 00:02:23,009 --> 00:02:24,577 HANG IN THERE. 34 00:02:24,577 --> 00:02:25,578 HEY, I MAY NOT HAVE TO. 35 00:02:25,578 --> 00:02:27,079 REMEMBER VONDA'S HUSBAND? 36 00:02:27,080 --> 00:02:28,581 YEAH, SURE. PAUL. 37 00:02:28,581 --> 00:02:31,083 PHIL. HE WORKS OVER THERE AT, UH... 38 00:02:31,084 --> 00:02:32,085 GARVIN MEAT PACKING PLANT, 39 00:02:32,085 --> 00:02:34,454 AND HE GOT ME AN INTERVIEW FOR A JOB TOMORROW. 40 00:02:34,454 --> 00:02:36,055 YEAH? WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT PACKING MEAT? 41 00:02:36,055 --> 00:02:40,626 WELL, I'VE BEEN LIVING WITH A RUMP ROAST FOR 15 YEARS. 42 00:02:44,864 --> 00:02:47,032 SO I'M GONNA GO MEET WITH THE MANAGER TOMORROW. 43 00:02:47,033 --> 00:02:48,100 GREAT. HEY, GET THIS. 44 00:02:48,101 --> 00:02:50,603 I ACTUALLY HAD TO TURN DOWN A JOB TODAY. YOU BELIEVE IT? 45 00:02:50,603 --> 00:02:52,671 GEE, DAN, TELL ME ABOUT YOUR DAY. 46 00:02:52,672 --> 00:02:55,875 I'M SERIOUS. THE DRIVEWAY JOB OVER AT OLD OAKS? 47 00:02:55,875 --> 00:02:58,644 WE'RE TOO BUSY. 48 00:02:58,645 --> 00:03:00,713 YOU'RE JUST A REGULAR BIG SHOT. 49 00:03:00,713 --> 00:03:02,715 YEAH. 50 00:03:02,715 --> 00:03:04,149 WHAT'S FOR SUPPER? 51 00:03:05,084 --> 00:03:06,085 [POUNDS ON TABLE] 52 00:03:06,085 --> 00:03:08,087 OH, MY GOD. 53 00:03:13,026 --> 00:03:14,527 UNCOOKED MEAT. 54 00:03:14,527 --> 00:03:17,530 OOH, AND I WAS JUST WORMED. 55 00:03:17,530 --> 00:03:18,531 OH, I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. 56 00:03:18,531 --> 00:03:20,032 I CAN'T DO ANYTHING RIGHT ANYMORE. 57 00:03:20,033 --> 00:03:22,535 YEAH, I KNOW, BABE. YOU KNOW... 58 00:03:22,535 --> 00:03:25,037 IT JUST MIGHT BE TIME TO SEND YOU DOWN TO THE MINORS. 59 00:03:25,038 --> 00:03:27,540 [TELEPHONE RINGS] 60 00:03:28,541 --> 00:03:29,542 HELLO. 61 00:03:29,542 --> 00:03:32,044 HEY, BECKERS, WHAT'S UP? 62 00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:35,048 BECKY WANTS TO KNOW IF SHE CAN GO OVER TO DIANE'S AFTER SCHOOL. 63 00:03:35,048 --> 00:03:37,050 IT IS AFTER SCHOOL. WHERE IS SHE NOW? 64 00:03:37,050 --> 00:03:38,051 WHERE ARE YOU NOW? 65 00:03:38,051 --> 00:03:40,053 DIANE'S. 66 00:03:42,555 --> 00:03:44,557 HEY, BECKY, YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO GO TO THE STORE 67 00:03:44,557 --> 00:03:46,559 FOR ME AFTER SCHOOL TODAY. 68 00:03:46,559 --> 00:03:49,562 YEAH, I WAS ON THE PHONE ALL DAY. 69 00:03:49,562 --> 00:03:51,063 WELL, YOU WANT YOUR OWN PHONE, 70 00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:54,467 YOU GOTTA BUY YOUR OWN HOUSE. 71 00:03:54,467 --> 00:03:56,535 YEAH, YOU MIGHT AS WELL EAT OVER AT DIANE'S. 72 00:03:56,536 --> 00:03:58,538 CALL US WHEN YOU'RE DONE. WE'LL PICK YOU UP. 73 00:03:58,538 --> 00:04:00,373 HAVE FUN. BYE. 74 00:04:00,373 --> 00:04:02,675 WHO WANTS TO HAVE DINNER AT WAGON TRAIN? 75 00:04:02,675 --> 00:04:04,510 YEAH, DADDY! 76 00:04:04,510 --> 00:04:06,078 WE'RE GOING TO HAVE DINNER AT WAGON TRAIN?! 77 00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:07,580 YOU BET WE ARE. SADDLE UP, PARD. 78 00:04:07,580 --> 00:04:08,581 WHY ARE WE GOING OUT? 79 00:04:08,581 --> 00:04:10,082 IS THE CAN OPENER BROKEN? 80 00:04:10,083 --> 00:04:12,085 HA HA. 81 00:04:12,085 --> 00:04:13,586 NO FOOLING YOU YOUNG'UNS. 82 00:04:13,586 --> 00:04:16,589 I'M GOING TO RIDE SHOTGUN. 83 00:04:22,595 --> 00:04:23,596 SO ANYWAY, VONDA'S HUSBAND'S 84 00:04:23,596 --> 00:04:25,598 BEEN WORKING THERE FOR 8 YEARS, YOU KNOW, 85 00:04:25,598 --> 00:04:27,600 AND THEY LIVE PRETTY DAMN WELL. 86 00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:29,101 I MEAN, HE STARTED OFF ON THE LOADING DOCK, 87 00:04:29,102 --> 00:04:32,605 AND ALREADY HE'S A FOREMAN... YOU KNOW... 88 00:04:32,605 --> 00:04:35,107 AHEM. SO THEY REALLY TAKE CARE OF THEIR OWN. 89 00:04:35,108 --> 00:04:36,109 AS OPPOSED TO WELLMAN, 90 00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:37,110 WHERE WE START OFF ON THE LOADING DOCK 91 00:04:37,110 --> 00:04:39,112 AND END UP IN THE PARKING LOT. 92 00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:40,613 SIT STILL. 93 00:04:40,613 --> 00:04:42,615 AND VONDA SAYS THAT THEY'RE REALLY NICE. 94 00:04:42,615 --> 00:04:45,784 THEY'RE ALWAYS HAVING, LIKE, COMPANY PICNICS AND JUNK LIKE THAT. 95 00:04:45,785 --> 00:04:47,853 WE NEVER DID NOTHING LIKE THAT AT WELLMAN. 96 00:04:47,854 --> 00:04:50,356 DID VONDA TELL YOU WHAT KIND OF JOB YOU'RE INTERVIEWING FOR? 97 00:04:50,356 --> 00:04:53,359 WELL, ALL I KNOW IS I'LL HAVE MY OWN CHAIR. 98 00:04:55,361 --> 00:04:58,263 OK. DO THIS. 99 00:05:01,200 --> 00:05:02,701 SHAKE YOUR HEAD. 100 00:05:05,605 --> 00:05:07,106 OK. NOW DO THIS. 101 00:05:09,108 --> 00:05:12,711 I HOPE THE INTERVIEW AIN'T THIS HARD. 102 00:05:12,712 --> 00:05:15,781 OH, YOU'RE GOING TO WOW 'EM, SIS. 103 00:05:15,782 --> 00:05:18,785 OH, THEY'RE NOT GOING TO HIRE ME. 104 00:05:18,785 --> 00:05:21,788 THEY'RE GONNA HIRE SOME LITTLE CHICKEE WITH A TIGHT SKIRT 105 00:05:21,788 --> 00:05:24,290 AND A LOOSE EVERYTHING ELSE. 106 00:05:24,290 --> 00:05:25,791 STOP. 107 00:05:25,792 --> 00:05:29,796 I'M GONNA BE SELLING MAGAZINES 'TIL THEY PUT ME IN MY GRAVE. 108 00:05:29,796 --> 00:05:34,801 I'M GONNA BE CREMATED WITH BACK ISSUES OF FIELD AND STREAM. 109 00:05:34,801 --> 00:05:37,937 YOU WANT TO GET CREMATED, TOO? 110 00:05:37,937 --> 00:05:41,006 I DON'T KNOW! DO WE HAVE TO TALK ABOUT IT NOW? 111 00:05:41,007 --> 00:05:43,009 CAN I JUST GET A MINUTE? 112 00:05:43,009 --> 00:05:44,477 YEAH. OK. 113 00:05:44,477 --> 00:05:47,346 ROSEANNE, YOU'RE MAKING TOO BIG OF A DEAL OUT OF IT. 114 00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:48,915 [DOOR CLOSES] 115 00:05:48,915 --> 00:05:51,417 IT'S JUST A JOB. 116 00:05:51,417 --> 00:05:52,918 YOU KNOW, WHEN I GO ON AN INTERVIEW, 117 00:05:52,919 --> 00:05:54,720 I DON'T GET DRESSED UP ON PURPOSE. 118 00:05:54,721 --> 00:05:55,788 IT JUST MAKES YOU MORE NERVOUS, 119 00:05:55,788 --> 00:05:58,290 THEN YOU START TO SWEAT... 120 00:05:58,291 --> 00:06:00,293 THEN YOU START WORRYING THAT YOU'RE SWEATING TOO MUCH, 121 00:06:00,293 --> 00:06:01,294 SO YOU SIT THERE REAL STIFF 122 00:06:01,294 --> 00:06:02,295 'CAUSE YOU'RE AFRAID IF YOU LIFT YOUR ARMS, 123 00:06:02,295 --> 00:06:05,298 YOU'LL HAVE THESE GREAT BIG PIT STAINS. 124 00:06:05,298 --> 00:06:07,800 AND THEN YOU GET THAT ACID FEELING IN YOUR STOMACH, 125 00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:10,803 LIKE IF YOU OPEN YOUR MOUTH TO TALK, YOU'RE GONNA BELCH. 126 00:06:10,803 --> 00:06:13,839 WHENEVER I GO ON AN INTERVIEW, I JUST GO AS ME. 127 00:06:13,840 --> 00:06:16,409 WELL, THAT'S WHY YOU WORK IN A BAR. 128 00:06:19,412 --> 00:06:20,913 JACKIE! 129 00:06:20,913 --> 00:06:22,414 [TURNS TV ON] 130 00:06:22,415 --> 00:06:24,417 JACKIE, YOU'RE BLOCKING ME. 131 00:06:24,417 --> 00:06:25,351 IN WHAT SENSE? 132 00:06:27,320 --> 00:06:29,322 IN A PLYMOUTH SENSE. 133 00:06:29,322 --> 00:06:31,724 OH, SORRY. I'LL MEET YOU OUT FRONT. 134 00:06:31,724 --> 00:06:33,292 WHAT ARE YOU DOING HOME? 135 00:06:33,292 --> 00:06:35,794 OH, WE POURED THAT DRIVEWAY, KNOCKED OFF EARLY. 136 00:06:35,795 --> 00:06:37,296 OH, HEY, I GOT THAT OLD OAKS JOB. 137 00:06:37,296 --> 00:06:38,797 I SUBCONTRACTED IT. 138 00:06:38,798 --> 00:06:41,801 OH, THAT'S GREAT, DAN. 139 00:06:41,801 --> 00:06:43,803 WELL, WISH ME LUCK. 140 00:06:43,803 --> 00:06:45,805 GOOD LUCK. 141 00:06:45,805 --> 00:06:47,606 WHERE YOU GOING? 142 00:06:47,607 --> 00:06:49,742 WHAT? 143 00:06:49,742 --> 00:06:52,177 WHAT?! 144 00:06:52,178 --> 00:06:54,747 HOW CAN YOU LIVE WITH ME AND NOT KNOW WHERE I'M GOING? 145 00:06:54,747 --> 00:06:57,249 NOW, DIDN'T WE LAY IN BED FOR TWO HOURS LAST NIGHT 146 00:06:57,250 --> 00:06:58,751 TALKING ABOUT HOW IMPORTANT THIS WAS? 147 00:06:58,751 --> 00:07:01,687 AND NOW YOU'RE SAYING, "WHERE ARE YOU GOING?" 148 00:07:01,687 --> 00:07:04,756 FORGIVE ME. I'M THE WORST HUSBAND WHO EVER LIVED. 149 00:07:04,757 --> 00:07:06,825 WELL, ENOUGH ABOUT YOU. NOW, HOW DO I LOOK? 150 00:07:06,826 --> 00:07:08,828 YOU LOOK FINE. 151 00:07:08,828 --> 00:07:11,330 COULD YOU MAYBE BE A LITTLE BIT MORE SPECIFIC, DAN? 152 00:07:11,330 --> 00:07:12,297 I MEAN, THIS IS REALLY IMPORTANT. 153 00:07:13,800 --> 00:07:16,369 YOU LOOK EXTREMELY FINE. 154 00:07:16,369 --> 00:07:18,437 WOULD YOU HIRE ME IN THIS? 155 00:07:18,438 --> 00:07:21,941 IF I WASN'T MARRIED, I'D HIRE YOU IN A MINUTE. 156 00:07:21,941 --> 00:07:23,442 SO I LOOK CHEAP, RIGHT? 157 00:07:23,443 --> 00:07:25,978 HELL, NO. 158 00:07:25,978 --> 00:07:27,546 I'M TALKING TOP DOLLAR. 159 00:07:27,547 --> 00:07:28,548 [CAR HORN HONKS] 160 00:07:28,548 --> 00:07:30,349 ONE SECOND! 161 00:07:30,349 --> 00:07:31,917 AAH! DON'T FLATTEN IT! 162 00:07:31,918 --> 00:07:34,420 IT TOOK ME AND JACKIE AN HOUR TO GET IT LIKE THIS! 163 00:07:34,420 --> 00:07:35,921 ROSEANNE, WILL YOU RELAX? 164 00:07:35,922 --> 00:07:37,423 EVERYTHING'S GONNA BE FINE. 165 00:07:37,423 --> 00:07:38,924 AND EVEN IF THINGS DON'T TURN OUT, 166 00:07:38,925 --> 00:07:41,427 REMEMBER, YOU'RE STILL A 50-50 PARTNER AT FOUR ACES CONSTRUCTION, 167 00:07:41,427 --> 00:07:44,430 AND I HAVE A FEELING SOME OF THEM DIVIDENDS ARE ABOUT TO PAY OFF. 168 00:07:44,430 --> 00:07:45,931 KNOCK IT OFF. I GOTTA GO. 169 00:07:45,932 --> 00:07:48,367 IN THAT OUTFIT? 170 00:07:48,367 --> 00:07:49,935 IT'S OK. IT'S A JOKE. 171 00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:53,806 WHAT IF THEY GIVE ME A TYPING TEST? 172 00:07:53,806 --> 00:07:55,474 YOU KNOW HOW TO TYPE. 173 00:07:55,475 --> 00:07:58,110 BUT I'M REALLY SLOW. 174 00:07:58,110 --> 00:08:00,178 HOW TOUGH COULD IT BE? THEY'RE SHORT WORDS. 175 00:08:00,179 --> 00:08:03,682 STEAK, MEAT, PRIME, CHUCK. 176 00:08:03,683 --> 00:08:05,484 PORTERHOUSE. 177 00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:08,588 THAT'D BE CRUEL. 178 00:08:08,588 --> 00:08:09,655 ROSEANNE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 179 00:08:09,655 --> 00:08:10,656 I'M READY. 180 00:08:10,656 --> 00:08:11,623 WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HAIR? 181 00:08:14,627 --> 00:08:15,427 IT LOOKS A LOT BETTER. 182 00:08:17,163 --> 00:08:19,231 DO YOU CARE IF I JUST DRIVE MYSELF? 183 00:08:19,232 --> 00:08:20,733 NO, HOW EVER YOU'RE COMFORTABLE. 184 00:08:20,733 --> 00:08:22,868 WATCH MY FRONT DOOR. THANKS. 185 00:08:22,869 --> 00:08:24,437 KNOCK 'EM DEAD, MY LITTLE LONDON BROIL. 186 00:08:31,944 --> 00:08:33,445 COME ON IN. 187 00:08:33,446 --> 00:08:36,449 HI. I'M MURIEL JOHNSON. SIT THERE, PLEASE. 188 00:08:37,450 --> 00:08:39,452 SORRY IT'S SO STUFFY IN HERE. 189 00:08:39,452 --> 00:08:42,121 THEY TURN OFF THE AIR CONDITIONING ON THE WEEKEND. 190 00:08:42,121 --> 00:08:44,556 OH, I'M FINE. WELL, I'M NOT. 191 00:08:44,557 --> 00:08:46,392 I HAD OTHER THINGS TO DO TODAY. 192 00:08:46,392 --> 00:08:47,960 WELL, WHY DON'T YOU JUST HIRE ME, 193 00:08:47,960 --> 00:08:50,529 AND WE'LL SKIP THE INTERVIEW. 194 00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:52,598 [DRYLY] HA HA HA. 195 00:08:52,598 --> 00:08:54,232 WELL, UH... 196 00:08:54,233 --> 00:08:55,300 IF YOU WANT MY OPINION, 197 00:08:55,301 --> 00:08:56,802 YOU'RE HERE FOR A POSITION 198 00:08:56,802 --> 00:08:59,805 THAT DOESN'T EVEN NEED TO BE FILLED. 199 00:08:59,805 --> 00:09:03,809 WELL, GREAT. THEN THE PRESSURE'S OFF. 200 00:09:03,809 --> 00:09:05,811 OH, NO PRESSURE. 201 00:09:05,811 --> 00:09:07,813 I LIKE YOU ALREADY. 202 00:09:07,813 --> 00:09:10,315 YOU DROVE DOWN AN ALLEY THAT'S FORBIDDEN TO CARS, 203 00:09:10,316 --> 00:09:12,785 AND YOU PARKED IN THE FIRE LANE. 204 00:09:14,720 --> 00:09:16,221 THE POINT IS, YOU GOT HERE ON TIME. 205 00:09:16,222 --> 00:09:18,424 YOU KNOW HOW TO GET THINGS DONE. 206 00:09:18,424 --> 00:09:20,492 WELL, I'M GLAD I IMPRESSED YOU. 207 00:09:20,493 --> 00:09:22,828 LOOK, ARE THEY GONNA BE NEEDING SOMEBODY? 208 00:09:22,828 --> 00:09:24,896 OH, NOT THEY...ME. 209 00:09:24,897 --> 00:09:26,899 THEY'RE OFF PLAYING GOLF OR DOING WHATEVER, 210 00:09:26,899 --> 00:09:29,868 BUT I'M HERE AS USUAL, RUNNING THEIR SHOW. 211 00:09:29,869 --> 00:09:31,437 WELL, CAN I JUST ASK YOU WHAT POSITION 212 00:09:31,437 --> 00:09:34,940 THEY NEED YOU TO HIRE SOMEONE TO FILL? 213 00:09:34,941 --> 00:09:37,610 SECRETARY TO MR. IVAN PITVORIS. 214 00:09:37,610 --> 00:09:39,178 THE MAN DOESN'T EVEN NEED A SECRETARY. 215 00:09:39,178 --> 00:09:41,580 HE DOESN'T DO ANYTHING. 216 00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:44,150 SOUNDS LIKE A GREAT JOB. 217 00:09:48,154 --> 00:09:49,155 YOU EVER THINK YOU MIGHT BE WORKING 218 00:09:49,155 --> 00:09:51,157 FOR A MAN NAMED PITVORIS? 219 00:09:51,157 --> 00:09:56,195 WELL, I HATE TO TELL YOU THE NAME I HAD FOR MY LAST BOSS. 220 00:09:56,195 --> 00:09:57,763 BEING AS YOU'RE UNEMPLOYED, 221 00:09:57,763 --> 00:09:59,898 I IMAGINE IT WAS PRETTY GOOD. 222 00:09:59,899 --> 00:10:01,467 WELL, I QUIT THAT JOB. 223 00:10:01,467 --> 00:10:03,969 I'VE NEVER BEEN FIRED FROM ANYTHING IN MY LIFE. 224 00:10:03,970 --> 00:10:06,472 PHIL GREEN SEEMS TO THINK THE WORLD OF YOU. 225 00:10:06,472 --> 00:10:08,240 YEAH. PHIL'S GREAT. 226 00:10:08,240 --> 00:10:09,808 PHIL'S LUCKY. 227 00:10:09,809 --> 00:10:10,810 IF IT WEREN'T FOR ME, 228 00:10:10,810 --> 00:10:13,145 THAT MAN WOULD STILL BE ON THE LOADING DOCK. 229 00:10:13,145 --> 00:10:15,714 WELL, HE SURE LOVES WORKING HERE. 230 00:10:15,715 --> 00:10:19,485 I MEAN, HE GOES ON AND ON ABOUT WHAT A GREAT PLACE THIS IS TO WORK, REALLY. 231 00:10:19,485 --> 00:10:22,020 LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING ABOUT PHIL GREEN. 232 00:10:22,021 --> 00:10:26,058 HE'S SMOOTHER THAN A NEWBORN BABY'S BUTT. 233 00:10:26,058 --> 00:10:27,559 AND THAT WIFE OF HIS. 234 00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:29,061 SHE'S SO PERKY, 235 00:10:29,061 --> 00:10:32,064 I'D LIKE TO DRIVE A NAIL THROUGH HER HEAD. 236 00:10:40,039 --> 00:10:43,042 WELL, I SEE WHY YOU'RE IN PERSONNEL. 237 00:10:47,046 --> 00:10:48,881 DID I OFFEND YOU? 238 00:10:48,881 --> 00:10:50,916 WELL, VONDA'S MY FRIEND. 239 00:10:50,916 --> 00:10:53,051 I DIDN'T SAY I DIDN'T LIKE HER. 240 00:10:53,052 --> 00:10:58,857 OH, I MUST HAVE TAKEN THAT NAIL THROUGH THE HEAD THING THE WRONG WAY. 241 00:10:58,858 --> 00:11:00,926 YOU'VE GOT QUITE AN ATTITUDE. 242 00:11:00,926 --> 00:11:02,494 YEAH. 243 00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:04,363 YEAH, I GUESS I DO. 244 00:11:05,264 --> 00:11:08,333 GOOD. I LIKE ATTITUDES. SIT DOWN. 245 00:11:08,334 --> 00:11:09,401 WHAT FOR? I MEAN... 246 00:11:09,402 --> 00:11:11,904 I'M HERE INTERVIEWING FOR A JOB THAT DOESN'T EXIST, 247 00:11:11,904 --> 00:11:14,406 AND I GET RECOMMENDED BY SOMEBODY YOU HATE. 248 00:11:14,407 --> 00:11:16,475 OBVIOUSLY, YOU'RE NOT GONNA HIRE ME. 249 00:11:16,475 --> 00:11:18,043 THAT'S WHY YOU'RE NOT IN PERSONNEL. 250 00:11:18,044 --> 00:11:19,678 YOU CAN'T READ PEOPLE. 251 00:11:19,679 --> 00:11:22,748 WELL, I CAN READ YOU, AND YOU'RE NUTS. 252 00:11:25,251 --> 00:11:27,553 AND YOU'RE A LOUSY INTERVIEW. 253 00:11:27,553 --> 00:11:29,888 YEAH, BUT I'M A HELL OF A WORKER. 254 00:11:29,889 --> 00:11:31,690 THAT'S WHY I'M HIRING YOU. 255 00:11:31,691 --> 00:11:33,125 EXCUSE ME? 256 00:11:33,125 --> 00:11:34,960 YOU HEARD ME. 257 00:11:36,228 --> 00:11:37,362 REALLY? 258 00:11:37,363 --> 00:11:38,997 REALLY. CAN YOU START MONDAY? 259 00:11:38,998 --> 00:11:42,067 MURIEL... 260 00:11:42,068 --> 00:11:44,070 I LOVE YOU. 261 00:11:44,070 --> 00:11:45,404 CAN I USE YOUR PHONE? 262 00:11:45,404 --> 00:11:47,973 SURE. HELP YOURSELF. 263 00:11:47,973 --> 00:11:49,341 I'LL GO GET YOUR PAPERWORK. 264 00:11:52,445 --> 00:11:54,513 YOU GOT IT? 265 00:11:54,513 --> 00:11:56,314 FOR SURE? 266 00:11:56,315 --> 00:11:57,883 AW, BABE, THAT'S FANTASTIC. 267 00:11:57,883 --> 00:11:59,885 NO, NO, TAKE YOUR TIME. 268 00:11:59,885 --> 00:12:01,887 YEAH, BABY. I LOVE YOU, TOO. BYE-BYE. 269 00:12:01,887 --> 00:12:02,954 JACKIE? 270 00:12:02,955 --> 00:12:04,022 YEAH? WHAT'S GOING ON? 271 00:12:04,023 --> 00:12:05,557 ROSEANNE GOT THE JOB. 272 00:12:05,558 --> 00:12:07,626 SHE GOT THE JOB! 273 00:12:09,628 --> 00:12:11,963 SHE GOT THE JOB! 274 00:12:12,798 --> 00:12:14,166 WHAT'S GOING ON? 275 00:12:14,166 --> 00:12:16,301 YOUR MOM GOT THE JOB. WHAT JOB? 276 00:12:16,302 --> 00:12:18,370 THE JOB AT... 277 00:12:18,370 --> 00:12:20,372 WHERE SHE WENT FOR THE INTERVIEW. 278 00:12:20,372 --> 00:12:23,141 THE PERSONNEL DIRECTOR IS SHOWING HER AROUND NOW. 279 00:12:23,142 --> 00:12:25,377 YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD MAKE YOU MOM REALLY HAPPY WHEN SHE HE GETS BACK? 280 00:12:25,377 --> 00:12:26,945 A TEMPLE IN HER HONOR. 281 00:12:26,946 --> 00:12:29,615 BESIDES--BESIDES THAT. 282 00:12:29,615 --> 00:12:31,116 THIS PLACE IS A MESS, RIGHT? 283 00:12:31,117 --> 00:12:32,118 BINGO. 284 00:12:32,118 --> 00:12:33,119 I'LL GET DARLENE. 285 00:12:33,119 --> 00:12:34,620 IS ROSEANNE EXCITED? 286 00:12:34,620 --> 00:12:36,622 NOT HALF AS EXCITED AS I AM. 287 00:12:36,622 --> 00:12:38,123 BUT SHE REALLY NEEDED THIS JOB. 288 00:12:38,124 --> 00:12:39,291 OH, YOU'RE TELLING ME. 289 00:12:39,291 --> 00:12:40,792 WE GOTTA CELEBRATE. DEFINITELY. 290 00:12:40,793 --> 00:12:42,294 I'LL GET CRYSTAL ON THE PHONE. 291 00:12:42,294 --> 00:12:43,295 I'LL LET HER KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON. 292 00:12:43,295 --> 00:12:45,764 WE GOT 30 MINUTES TO GET THIS HOUSE PRESENTABLE. 293 00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:48,501 RUB A LAMP. 294 00:12:48,501 --> 00:12:50,936 YOUR MOM GOT THAT JOB. 295 00:12:50,936 --> 00:12:52,003 AWESOME! 296 00:12:52,004 --> 00:12:54,006 DOES THAT MEAN SHE NOT GONNA BE ANNOYING PEOPLE 297 00:12:54,006 --> 00:12:55,507 ON THE PHONE ANYMORE FOR A LIVING? 298 00:12:55,508 --> 00:12:57,009 HER TELEPHONE SALES DAYS ARE OVER. 299 00:12:57,009 --> 00:12:58,010 D.J.: YAY! 300 00:12:58,010 --> 00:12:59,277 NOW LET'S GET TO IT. 301 00:12:59,278 --> 00:13:00,345 AND REMEMBER, 302 00:13:00,346 --> 00:13:01,847 WE'RE JUST LOOKING FOR THE ILLUSION OF CLEAN. 303 00:13:03,349 --> 00:13:04,850 I SHOULD GET VONDA ON THE PHONE, TOO. 304 00:13:04,850 --> 00:13:05,851 AND I'LL CALL SYLVIA. 305 00:13:05,851 --> 00:13:06,852 WE'LL GET A WHOLE PARTY TOGETHER. 306 00:13:06,852 --> 00:13:07,853 I SHOULD GO TO THE STORE. 307 00:13:07,853 --> 00:13:10,856 I DON'T THINK DRIED LENTILS WILL CUT IT. 308 00:13:10,856 --> 00:13:14,593 CRYSTAL? HI, IT'S JACKIE. ARE YOU SITTING DOWN? 309 00:13:14,593 --> 00:13:17,395 NO, NO, CRYSTAL, DON'T GO GET A CHAIR. 310 00:13:18,697 --> 00:13:22,200 ROSEANNE, I NEED YOU TO FILL OUT THESE 3 FORMS. 311 00:13:22,201 --> 00:13:24,203 YOU CAN TAKE THE YELLOW BOOKLET HOME WITH YOU. 312 00:13:24,203 --> 00:13:27,206 IT EXPLAINS YOUR HEALTH BENEFITS, INSURANCE, 313 00:13:27,206 --> 00:13:28,707 AND ALL THAT OTHER GOOD STUFF. 314 00:13:28,707 --> 00:13:30,208 GREAT. THANKS, MURIEL. 315 00:13:30,209 --> 00:13:33,212 UH, YOU MIGHT WANT TO COME IN A LITTLE EARLY ON MONDAY, 316 00:13:33,212 --> 00:13:36,715 JUST TO FAMILIARIZE YOURSELF WITH THE COMPUTER. 317 00:13:36,715 --> 00:13:42,053 OH, LOOK, A MICROWAVE WITH ITS OWN ORGAN. 318 00:13:42,054 --> 00:13:45,257 YES. WE USE THE TANGERINE 3. IT CAN DO ANYTHING. 319 00:13:45,257 --> 00:13:49,728 WELL, GOOD. MAYBE IT CAN TEACH ME HOW TO USE A COMPUTER. 320 00:13:49,728 --> 00:13:52,964 YOU MEAN, YOU NEVER WORKED ON A COMPUTER AT WELLMAN? 321 00:13:52,965 --> 00:13:55,334 I WORKED ON MY FEET AT WELLMAN. 322 00:13:57,336 --> 00:13:59,171 BUT I CAN LEARN. 323 00:13:59,171 --> 00:14:00,739 NOT IN ONE DAY YOU CAN'T. 324 00:14:00,739 --> 00:14:03,408 I'LL COME IN EARLY AND I'LL STAY REALLY LATE. 325 00:14:03,409 --> 00:14:04,977 ROSEANNE, 326 00:14:04,977 --> 00:14:07,512 EVERYTHING WE DO HERE IS ON A COMPUTER. 327 00:14:07,513 --> 00:14:09,581 I NEED SOMEBODY TO START ON MONDAY. 328 00:14:09,582 --> 00:14:12,084 I MEAN, OUR WHOLE INVENTORY IS COMPUTERIZED. 329 00:14:12,084 --> 00:14:14,586 OUR SALES, OUR SHIPPING. 330 00:14:14,587 --> 00:14:17,823 DAMN, AND I SENT EVERYBODY HOME. 331 00:14:17,823 --> 00:14:20,292 I'M SORRY. 332 00:14:20,292 --> 00:14:24,362 I SUPPOSE SEVERANCE PAY IS OUT OF THE QUESTION. 333 00:14:26,799 --> 00:14:27,866 HERE SHE COMES. 334 00:14:27,867 --> 00:14:29,368 WHOA! OH! WE SHOULD ALL HIDE 335 00:14:29,368 --> 00:14:30,869 AND JUMP OUT AND YELL, "SURPRISE!" 336 00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:31,871 I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO THAT. 337 00:14:31,871 --> 00:14:32,872 Jackie: GO FOR IT. 338 00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:34,373 WELL, I'M NOT GONNA BE THE ONLY ONE. 339 00:14:34,373 --> 00:14:35,374 HEY, VONDA AND PHIL, WILL YOU DO IT, TOO? 340 00:14:35,374 --> 00:14:36,375 SURE, WE'LL DO IT. 341 00:14:36,375 --> 00:14:37,876 HOW ABOUT EVERYONE ELSE? 342 00:14:37,877 --> 00:14:40,279 DAN? DAN? 343 00:14:40,279 --> 00:14:41,647 YOU HAVE MY WORD. 344 00:14:41,647 --> 00:14:43,048 YOU THINK WE SHOULD HAVE A SIGNAL? 345 00:14:43,048 --> 00:14:45,116 HOW ABOUT, UH, WHEN SHE OPENS THE DOOR? 346 00:14:45,117 --> 00:14:46,118 PERFECT. 347 00:14:47,786 --> 00:14:48,853 WHAT'S TAKING HER SO LONG? 348 00:14:48,854 --> 00:14:50,856 SHE CAN'T GET YOUR CAR DOOR CLOSED. 349 00:14:50,856 --> 00:14:52,357 NOW SHE'S GOT IT. 350 00:14:52,358 --> 00:14:53,859 NOW SHE'S KICKING HELL OUT OF YOUR CAR. 351 00:14:53,859 --> 00:14:54,860 WHAT?! 352 00:14:54,860 --> 00:14:56,862 OH! HERE SHE COMES. EVERYBODY GET READY. 353 00:14:56,862 --> 00:14:58,363 DARLENE! DARLENE! TURN OFF THE TV! 354 00:14:58,364 --> 00:14:59,865 GET THE LIGHTS! GO! 355 00:14:59,865 --> 00:15:01,867 NO, DAN! 356 00:15:01,867 --> 00:15:02,868 VONDA, YOU AND PHIL ARE DOING IT WITH ME, RIGHT?. 357 00:15:02,868 --> 00:15:04,870 SHH! 358 00:15:07,673 --> 00:15:08,573 SURPRISE! 359 00:15:09,441 --> 00:15:11,443 HI, CRYSTAL. 360 00:15:13,946 --> 00:15:14,980 HIP HIP! 361 00:15:14,980 --> 00:15:16,181 HOORAY! HOORAY! 362 00:15:16,181 --> 00:15:17,048 HIP HIP! 363 00:15:17,049 --> 00:15:18,250 HOORAY! HOORAY! 364 00:15:18,250 --> 00:15:19,384 HIP HIP! 365 00:15:19,385 --> 00:15:20,586 HOORAY! HOORAY! 366 00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:22,154 CONGRATULATIONS, BABE! 367 00:15:22,154 --> 00:15:25,157 OH, WE GOT TO TALK. 368 00:15:25,157 --> 00:15:28,660 IN HONOR OF YOUR NEW JOB, 369 00:15:28,661 --> 00:15:32,965 YOUR TELEPHONE MAGAZINE SALES BOOK.... 370 00:15:35,801 --> 00:15:37,803 I WISH YOU HADN'T DONE THAT, DAN. 371 00:15:37,803 --> 00:15:39,938 HA HA! NICE GOING, SIS. 372 00:15:39,939 --> 00:15:44,944 All: ROSIE! ROSIE! ROSIE! ROSIE! ROSIE! 373 00:15:44,944 --> 00:15:46,512 I HOPE I NEVER GET OLD. 374 00:15:46,512 --> 00:15:48,480 YOU ALREADY ARE. 375 00:15:48,480 --> 00:15:49,547 All: ROSIE! ROSIE! 376 00:15:49,548 --> 00:15:52,417 OK, OK, OK. I WANNA MAKE A SPEECH. 377 00:15:52,418 --> 00:15:54,720 THIS OUGHT TO BE GOOD. 378 00:15:54,720 --> 00:15:57,289 ROSIE, I JUST WANNA SAY THAT IF IT HADN'T BEEN FOR YOU, 379 00:15:57,289 --> 00:15:58,957 I WOULDN'T HAVE NEVER QUIT WELLMAN. 380 00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:01,894 BUT NOW ME AND EMILIO, WE HAVE OUR OWN LITTLE BUSINESS, 381 00:16:01,894 --> 00:16:03,762 AND WE'RE ALL DOING GREAT. 382 00:16:03,762 --> 00:16:05,263 AND WE OWE IT ALL TO YOU. 383 00:16:05,264 --> 00:16:08,400 I ONLY WISH THERE WAS A WAY FOR US TO THANK YOU. 384 00:16:08,400 --> 00:16:12,537 WELL, MAYBE PUTTING ME ON THE PAYROLL MIGHT BE A NICE GESTURE. 385 00:16:12,538 --> 00:16:16,909 [SPEAKING SPANISH] 386 00:16:16,909 --> 00:16:19,978 JUANITA, HE'S DOING IT AGAIN. 387 00:16:19,979 --> 00:16:21,814 BABY, YOU'RE A REAL HERO. 388 00:16:23,649 --> 00:16:25,784 I DIDN'T GET THE JOB. 389 00:16:25,784 --> 00:16:27,285 WHAT? 390 00:16:27,286 --> 00:16:28,854 YOU HEARD ME. 391 00:16:32,358 --> 00:16:34,360 WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU DIDN'T GET THE JOB? 392 00:16:34,360 --> 00:16:35,361 ROSEANNE, YOU WANT A BEER? 393 00:16:35,361 --> 00:16:37,162 NOT NOW, CRYSTAL. 394 00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:38,730 I MEAN I DIDN'T GET THE JOB. 395 00:16:38,731 --> 00:16:41,433 YOU OUGHT TO BE USED TO HEARING THAT BY NOW. 396 00:16:41,433 --> 00:16:42,500 SO, YOU WANT ME TO GET THE BARBECUE STARTED, 397 00:16:42,501 --> 00:16:43,502 PUT ON HAMBURGERS, HOT DOGS? 398 00:16:43,502 --> 00:16:45,504 NO. NO. 399 00:16:45,504 --> 00:16:46,872 IS SOMETHING WRONG? 400 00:16:50,209 --> 00:16:51,743 I DIDN'T GET THE JOB. 401 00:16:51,744 --> 00:16:52,811 WHAT HAPPENED? 402 00:16:52,811 --> 00:16:56,214 OH, I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT RIGHT NOW. 403 00:16:56,215 --> 00:17:00,118 PHIL, I'D JUST LIKE TO THANK YOU FOR PUTTING IN A GOOD WORD. 404 00:17:00,119 --> 00:17:01,186 TOO BAD I'LL BE IN THE WAREHOUSE. 405 00:17:01,186 --> 00:17:02,187 I WON'T BE ABLE TO SEE THAT MUCH OF YOU. 406 00:17:02,187 --> 00:17:04,489 DID MURIEL SAY WHEN YOUR LUNCH HOUR IS? 407 00:17:04,490 --> 00:17:08,227 OH, I THINK IT'S PRETTY FLEXIBLE. 408 00:17:08,227 --> 00:17:10,295 YOU KNOW, IF IT HADN'T BEEN FOR PHIL 409 00:17:10,295 --> 00:17:12,297 PUTTING IN A GOOD WORD WITH MR. GARVIN, 410 00:17:12,297 --> 00:17:14,799 MURIEL WOULD STILL BE ON THE LOADING DOCK... 411 00:17:14,800 --> 00:17:17,803 WHERE SHE BELONGS. 412 00:17:17,803 --> 00:17:20,305 OH, NOT NOW, JACKIE. 413 00:17:20,305 --> 00:17:21,806 SO YOU DIDN'T GET THIS JOB. 414 00:17:21,807 --> 00:17:23,308 THE RIGHT JOB WILL COME ALONG. 415 00:17:23,308 --> 00:17:24,809 THIS WAS THE RIGHT JOB. 416 00:17:24,810 --> 00:17:26,311 WELL, THEN YOU'LL GET ANOTHER JOB. 417 00:17:26,311 --> 00:17:28,112 NO, I WANTED THIS JOB. 418 00:17:28,113 --> 00:17:29,681 ROSEANNE, 419 00:17:29,681 --> 00:17:32,917 YOU BEING OUT OF WORK RIGHT NOW IS NOT THAT BIG A DEAL. 420 00:17:32,918 --> 00:17:34,419 MOM, DO WE HAVE ANY MORE CHIPS? 421 00:17:34,420 --> 00:17:35,721 THEY'RE IN THE CUPBOARD. 422 00:17:35,721 --> 00:17:37,055 WHICH CUPBOARD? 423 00:17:37,056 --> 00:17:39,124 THE ONE WITH THE CHIPS. 424 00:17:40,659 --> 00:17:42,227 LOOK, MY BEING OUT OF WORK RIGHT NOW 425 00:17:42,227 --> 00:17:43,228 IS A BIG DEAL, DAN. 426 00:17:43,228 --> 00:17:45,530 BECAUSE I'VE BEEN OUT OF WORK FOR 4 MONTHS. 427 00:17:45,531 --> 00:17:47,099 ROSEANNE, YOU GOT A MINUTE? 428 00:17:47,099 --> 00:17:48,600 YOU KNOW, I READ YOUR HOROSCOPE TODAY-- 429 00:17:48,600 --> 00:17:50,101 NOT NOW, CRYSTAL. 430 00:17:50,102 --> 00:17:52,604 JOE, YOU REMEMBER ROSIE. 431 00:17:52,604 --> 00:17:53,605 SURE. 432 00:17:53,605 --> 00:17:55,607 HOW YOU DOING, ROSIE? 433 00:17:55,607 --> 00:17:57,108 HI, JOE. 434 00:17:57,109 --> 00:17:59,111 WHERE'S THE CAKE? 435 00:17:59,111 --> 00:18:00,612 I'LL GO CHECK. 436 00:18:00,612 --> 00:18:01,613 SO TELL ME, 437 00:18:01,613 --> 00:18:03,615 HOW OLD ARE YOU TODAY, ROSIE? 438 00:18:03,615 --> 00:18:04,616 JOE, I'M 35 TODAY. 439 00:18:04,616 --> 00:18:06,618 AH... 440 00:18:06,618 --> 00:18:09,120 I'M SORRY WE DIDN'T BRING A GIFT. 441 00:18:09,121 --> 00:18:12,557 THAT'S OK, JOE. I APPRECIATE YOU COMING. 442 00:18:12,558 --> 00:18:14,126 ROSEANNE... 443 00:18:14,126 --> 00:18:15,627 YOU WANT ME TO GET RID OF ALL THESE PEOPLE? 444 00:18:15,627 --> 00:18:17,128 I COULD DO THAT. 445 00:18:17,129 --> 00:18:21,133 ROSEANNE, I JUST HEARD. 446 00:18:21,133 --> 00:18:24,136 YOU KNOW, IF IT WASN'T FOR YOU, I WOULD-- 447 00:18:24,136 --> 00:18:27,139 HOLD ON THERE, CRYSTAL. 448 00:18:27,139 --> 00:18:28,640 I'M SORRY. 449 00:18:28,640 --> 00:18:30,141 BUT I WOULDN'T BE MY OWN BOSS 450 00:18:30,142 --> 00:18:31,643 WITH MY OWN HOURS, 451 00:18:31,643 --> 00:18:33,144 AND THE SATISFACTION THAT COMES 452 00:18:33,145 --> 00:18:35,647 FROM MAKING MY CUSTOMERS FEEL MORE BEAUTIFUL 453 00:18:35,647 --> 00:18:39,651 AND CONFIDENT WITH THEIR CINDY-LOU COSMETICS. 454 00:18:39,651 --> 00:18:42,320 AND I OWE IT ALL TO YOU, ROSEANNE. 455 00:18:42,321 --> 00:18:45,390 WELL, YOU'VE MADE ME FEEL VERY UNCOMFORTABLE, CRYSTAL, 456 00:18:45,390 --> 00:18:47,392 AND I THANK YOU. 457 00:18:49,728 --> 00:18:52,297 OH! ARE YOU GOING TO BE OK? 458 00:18:52,297 --> 00:18:53,798 I THINK SO. 459 00:18:53,799 --> 00:18:56,802 BUT I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, ROSEANNE. 460 00:18:56,802 --> 00:18:59,137 WHY WON'T ANYONE HIRE YOU? 461 00:19:00,939 --> 00:19:03,441 DON'T TRY TO CHEER ME UP, CRYSTAL. 462 00:19:03,442 --> 00:19:04,943 ROSEANNE, WE GOT TO GO, 463 00:19:04,943 --> 00:19:06,444 BUT I JUST WANT TO THANK YOU ONE MORE TIME 464 00:19:06,445 --> 00:19:08,447 FOR GETTING ALL OF US OUT OF THAT HELLHOLE. 465 00:19:08,447 --> 00:19:11,950 QUITTING WELLMAN WAS THE BEST THING YOU EVER DID. 466 00:19:11,950 --> 00:19:13,451 THANKS, VONDA. 467 00:19:13,452 --> 00:19:14,453 Dan: BYE, VONDA. 468 00:19:15,454 --> 00:19:16,955 CONGRATULATING ME, 469 00:19:16,955 --> 00:19:18,957 TELLING ME QUITTING MY JOB 470 00:19:18,957 --> 00:19:20,458 WAS THE BEST THING I EVER DID. 471 00:19:20,459 --> 00:19:22,961 IT WAS THE STUPIDEST THING I EVER DID. 472 00:19:22,961 --> 00:19:23,962 HOW COULD I DO THAT? 473 00:19:23,962 --> 00:19:25,730 HOW COULD I QUIT MY JOB? 474 00:19:25,731 --> 00:19:27,799 I'VE GOT 3 KIDS. 475 00:19:27,799 --> 00:19:29,801 AND SOME GUY GIVES ME A LITTLE LIP, 476 00:19:29,801 --> 00:19:31,302 AND I TOSSED IT ALL. 477 00:19:31,303 --> 00:19:33,805 I TOSSED MY PAYCHECK, MY BENEFITS. 478 00:19:33,805 --> 00:19:35,807 I TOSSED MY PENSION. 479 00:19:35,807 --> 00:19:36,974 I LET HIM BEAT ME. 480 00:19:36,975 --> 00:19:38,543 HE DIDN'T BEAT YOU. 481 00:19:38,544 --> 00:19:40,646 HE DID BEAT ME, DAN, AND YOU KNOW WHY? 482 00:19:40,646 --> 00:19:42,214 BECAUSE HE HAS A JOB... 483 00:19:42,214 --> 00:19:43,215 AND YOU'VE GOT A JOB, 484 00:19:43,215 --> 00:19:44,716 AND JACKIE'S GOT A JOB, 485 00:19:44,716 --> 00:19:46,217 VONDA'S GOT A JOB, 486 00:19:46,218 --> 00:19:48,220 AND HELL, EVEN CRYSTAL HAS A JOB. 487 00:19:48,220 --> 00:19:50,222 WHAT DO I GOT? 488 00:19:50,222 --> 00:19:52,224 I GOT ZIP! 489 00:19:52,224 --> 00:19:55,427 IT'S OK, BABY. LEAVE IT OPEN. 490 00:19:55,427 --> 00:19:56,995 THAT'S IT, DAN. JUST GO AHEAD AND MAKE A JOKE. 491 00:19:56,995 --> 00:19:59,430 "ROSEANNE CAN'T FIND A JOB. HA HA HA!" 492 00:19:59,431 --> 00:20:00,832 WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO SAY? 493 00:20:00,832 --> 00:20:02,733 WHY DON'T YOU TELL ME WHAT TO DO AGAIN, DAN? 494 00:20:04,570 --> 00:20:06,271 I DIDN'T TELL YOU TO QUIT YOUR JOB. 495 00:20:06,271 --> 00:20:08,573 THE HELL YOU DIDN'T. THE HELL I DID! 496 00:20:08,574 --> 00:20:11,076 I TOLD YOU IF YOU WANTED TO QUIT YOUR JOB, 497 00:20:11,076 --> 00:20:12,577 YOU SHOULD GO AHEAD AND QUIT YOUR JOB. 498 00:20:12,578 --> 00:20:13,879 I WAS TRYING TO SUPPORT YOU. 499 00:20:13,879 --> 00:20:15,447 HA HA. YOU TOLD ME TO QUIT MY JOB, 500 00:20:15,447 --> 00:20:17,415 AND NOW YOU RESENT ME BECAUSE I DID! 501 00:20:17,416 --> 00:20:18,650 BULL. BULL. BULL. 502 00:20:18,650 --> 00:20:19,717 YOU'RE ALL THE TIME PICKING AT ME 503 00:20:19,718 --> 00:20:21,152 AND MAKING LITTLE CRACKS! 504 00:20:21,153 --> 00:20:22,220 WE ALWAYS MAKE LITTLE CRACKS! 505 00:20:22,221 --> 00:20:23,722 WE ALWAYS MAKE LITTLE JOKES. 506 00:20:23,722 --> 00:20:24,723 THAT'S HOW WE ARE. 507 00:20:24,723 --> 00:20:28,626 THAT'S WHY WE GET ALONG SO WELL! 508 00:20:28,627 --> 00:20:31,696 OH, WELL, IT'S JUST SO EASY FOR YOU TO MAKE JOKES 509 00:20:31,697 --> 00:20:33,198 WHEN I'M THE ONE THAT'S OUT OF WORK 510 00:20:33,198 --> 00:20:36,334 AND EVERYTHING'S GOING GREAT FOR YOU. 511 00:20:37,736 --> 00:20:39,237 I'M NOT MAD AT YOU FOR QUITTING YOUR JOB. 512 00:20:39,238 --> 00:20:40,739 YOU'RE MAD AT YOU FOR QUITTING YOUR JOB. 513 00:20:40,739 --> 00:20:41,740 I'M MAD AT ME FOR QUITTING MY JOB? 514 00:20:41,740 --> 00:20:42,741 AND YOU'RE TAKING IT OUT ON ME 515 00:20:42,741 --> 00:20:43,742 BECAUSE YOU THINK YOUR FAMILY LET YOU DOWN, 516 00:20:43,742 --> 00:20:44,743 AND I'M SICK OF IT! 517 00:20:44,743 --> 00:20:46,244 SO I QUIT! 518 00:20:46,245 --> 00:20:48,747 AND YOU THINK I'M MAD BECAUSE I QUIT?! 519 00:20:48,747 --> 00:20:50,749 YEAH, I'M MAD THAT I QUIT-- 520 00:20:50,749 --> 00:20:54,419 AND WHERE DID EVERYBODY GO? 521 00:20:58,557 --> 00:21:00,458 I'M SORRY. 522 00:21:00,459 --> 00:21:02,527 I DID LET MY FAMILY DOWN, 523 00:21:02,527 --> 00:21:04,529 AND YOU KNOW IT AND I KNOW IT. 524 00:21:04,529 --> 00:21:09,834 [SIGHS] THAT HURTS. IT HURTS REAL BAD, DAN. 525 00:21:34,526 --> 00:21:35,527 HEY. 526 00:21:35,527 --> 00:21:37,529 WHAT? 527 00:21:37,529 --> 00:21:39,531 GET A JOB. [LAUGHS] 528 00:21:49,041 --> 00:21:50,542 WHERE'S MY HISTORY BOOK? 529 00:21:50,542 --> 00:21:52,043 IT'S UNDERNEATH THE KING'S NEWSPAPER. 530 00:21:52,044 --> 00:21:55,047 DARLENE, GET IT DOWN HERE! 531 00:21:55,047 --> 00:21:56,548 BYE, MOM. BYE, DAD. 532 00:21:56,548 --> 00:21:58,216 HEY, I GOT ONE MORE PANCAKE. 533 00:21:58,216 --> 00:22:00,318 I WANT FRENCH TOAST. 534 00:22:00,319 --> 00:22:02,254 WELL, YOU'D BETTER MOVE TO EUROPE. 535 00:22:04,089 --> 00:22:05,590 WHAT ABOUT YOUR BREAKFAST? 536 00:22:05,590 --> 00:22:07,091 I'LL EAT IT ON THE BUS. 537 00:22:07,092 --> 00:22:08,093 I'M GONE. 538 00:22:08,093 --> 00:22:09,594 I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER, BABY. 539 00:22:09,594 --> 00:22:11,095 HEY, YOU FORGOT SOMETHING. 540 00:22:11,096 --> 00:22:12,597 [CHUCKLES] 541 00:22:14,099 --> 00:22:16,601 I MEANT YOUR LUNCH. 542 00:22:19,104 --> 00:22:20,105 BYE. 543 00:22:20,105 --> 00:22:21,606 BYE, MOM. 544 00:22:32,084 --> 00:22:33,452 GOOD MORNING. THIS IS ROSEANNE 545 00:22:33,452 --> 00:22:35,020 FROM THE MAGAZINE DISCOUNT HOUSE, 546 00:22:35,020 --> 00:22:37,022 AND SINCE YOU'RE A PREFERRED CUSTOMER... 547 00:22:37,022 --> 00:22:40,025 CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE --www.ncicap.org-- 548 00:22:40,075 --> 00:22:44,625 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 37909

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