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1
00:00:05,279 --> 00:00:06,980
The Reno sheriff's
department is reducing
2
00:00:07,014 --> 00:00:10,249
Our carbon footprint and
not relying on Arab oil
3
00:00:10,284 --> 00:00:13,786
Anymore with the first-
Ever electric squad car.
4
00:00:14,522 --> 00:00:17,690
Made in America.
How about it? Made in the USA.
5
00:00:17,725 --> 00:00:19,192
Detroit city, baby.
6
00:00:19,226 --> 00:00:20,860
USA! USA!
7
00:00:20,894 --> 00:00:23,897
Oh, fuck it!
Fuck it.
8
00:00:23,931 --> 00:00:25,832
Jesus Christ!
Oh, fuck!
9
00:00:25,866 --> 00:00:28,768
Junior!
He's arcing. He's arcing.
10
00:00:28,802 --> 00:00:30,703
Don't touch him.
He's arcing.
11
00:00:30,738 --> 00:00:32,138
I think my
fillings melted.
12
00:00:32,172 --> 00:00:35,108
Should've got Japanese.
Should've gone Japanese.
13
00:00:36,544 --> 00:00:38,712
Son of a bitch.
Goddamn it!
14
00:00:43,918 --> 00:00:46,219
They all have guns!
15
00:00:49,457 --> 00:00:50,589
Whoo hoo!
16
00:00:53,361 --> 00:00:54,661
Ow!
17
00:00:54,695 --> 00:00:56,329
Push them together?
18
00:00:56,363 --> 00:00:59,032
Get off the bike!
Off your bike.
19
00:00:59,066 --> 00:01:01,034
Oh! God!
20
00:01:02,136 --> 00:01:03,502
Captioning made possible by
MTV networks
21
00:01:03,537 --> 00:01:06,439
Captioned by the national
captioning institute --Www.Ncicap.Org--
22
00:01:21,522 --> 00:01:23,623
Raineesha... did you
put this in my locker?
23
00:01:23,657 --> 00:01:25,324
I got one, too.
24
00:01:25,359 --> 00:01:26,793
What is it?
25
00:01:26,827 --> 00:01:30,463
Dangle:
you, the proud bearer of this letter, have been
26
00:01:30,497 --> 00:01:33,199
Invited by James Ron
Dangle to join him
27
00:01:33,234 --> 00:01:36,602
At the Sierra Historical
Society for dinner
28
00:01:36,637 --> 00:01:39,005
And a murder.
29
00:01:39,040 --> 00:01:42,041
There will be intrigue,
suspense, and lots
30
00:01:42,076 --> 00:01:43,409
Of pigs in blankets.
31
00:01:43,443 --> 00:01:44,377
Pigs in a blanket.
We get it.
32
00:01:44,411 --> 00:01:45,445
What are you doing?
Why are you in here?
33
00:01:45,479 --> 00:01:46,846
I was just reading
everything that's
34
00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:48,547
On the invitation that I
just gave each of you.
35
00:01:48,582 --> 00:01:49,549
We can read.
36
00:01:49,583 --> 00:01:50,783
I know, but it's
a funny font.
37
00:01:50,817 --> 00:01:54,020
OK, so this Friday,
8 PM, murder mystery
38
00:01:54,055 --> 00:01:55,856
Dinner, Sierra
Historical Society.
39
00:01:55,890 --> 00:01:57,524
I've rented it out.
40
00:01:57,558 --> 00:01:58,458
Should be lots of fun.
41
00:01:58,492 --> 00:02:02,395
I have very, very good
roles for both of you.
42
00:02:02,429 --> 00:02:04,531
Oh, wait, this isn't
one of those, I show up
43
00:02:04,565 --> 00:02:05,932
And I actually get
murdered or anything.
44
00:02:05,966 --> 00:02:07,967
Not a snuff.
Not a snuff. Not a snuff at all.
45
00:02:08,002 --> 00:02:09,135
Hey, Cindy, did
you get yours?
46
00:02:09,170 --> 00:02:10,804
Sure did,
lieutenant, honey.
47
00:02:10,838 --> 00:02:13,372
Williams: what if we
can't make it?
48
00:02:13,407 --> 00:02:14,673
Mm, you have to
make it.
49
00:02:14,708 --> 00:02:17,276
Hey, Trudy,
don't eat this.
50
00:02:17,311 --> 00:02:18,511
Let's not eat
this, please.
51
00:02:18,545 --> 00:02:20,813
OK. This is not
like Willy Wonka. It's not chocolate.
52
00:02:20,847 --> 00:02:22,648
No. This is not candy.
This is just regular paper.
53
00:02:26,954 --> 00:02:28,654
Son of a bitch.
54
00:02:28,689 --> 00:02:29,522
Here we are.
55
00:02:29,557 --> 00:02:31,457
Oh, man.
Oh, man.
56
00:02:31,491 --> 00:02:32,792
Sheriff's department!
57
00:02:32,827 --> 00:02:34,928
Oh, man, whatever
happened here, we missed it.
58
00:02:34,962 --> 00:02:36,663
Reno 11 charlie 12.
59
00:02:36,697 --> 00:02:38,931
This is Jones and
Junior at Reno's diamond
60
00:02:38,965 --> 00:02:41,233
Exchange on 14th
and Virginia.
61
00:02:41,268 --> 00:02:42,702
We're gonna need
backup right away.
62
00:02:42,736 --> 00:02:45,739
Gentlemen, no need
to be alarmed.
63
00:02:45,773 --> 00:02:48,975
I've already apprehended
this scumbag.
64
00:02:49,009 --> 00:02:50,576
From now on, you are not
alone in your fight to
65
00:02:50,611 --> 00:02:53,279
Clean up Reno.
66
00:02:53,314 --> 00:02:57,017
You have an ally who'll
be on every roof,
67
00:02:57,051 --> 00:03:00,587
Every back alley,
every street.
68
00:03:00,621 --> 00:03:02,155
Whenever you guys need
me, you just call,
69
00:03:02,189 --> 00:03:04,357
And I will be there.
70
00:03:04,392 --> 00:03:05,725
What do we call you?
71
00:03:05,759 --> 00:03:09,462
Call me Nighthawk.
72
00:03:14,634 --> 00:03:18,504
Both: thanks, Nighthawk!
73
00:03:18,538 --> 00:03:20,072
Got a feeling things
are gonna be a whole lot
74
00:03:20,107 --> 00:03:21,474
Better around
here, Jones.
75
00:03:21,509 --> 00:03:23,509
You're damn
right, Junior.
76
00:03:23,543 --> 00:03:25,544
What do you have to
say for yourself?
77
00:03:25,579 --> 00:03:28,080
Ow! What the
fuck?
78
00:03:28,115 --> 00:03:29,749
Are you two
fucking retarded?
79
00:03:29,783 --> 00:03:31,550
Are you really
fucking police officers?
80
00:03:31,585 --> 00:03:33,119
That guy is not a
fucking superhero.
81
00:03:33,153 --> 00:03:35,321
That's a stupid-ass
motherfucker on a bike
82
00:03:35,355 --> 00:03:37,256
Who just stole
all the goddamn jewelry.
83
00:03:37,291 --> 00:03:39,058
Guess what,
Einstein.
84
00:03:39,093 --> 00:03:42,595
I fucking work at the
goddamn jewelry store.
85
00:03:42,629 --> 00:03:43,929
You didn't even ask him
any fucking questions.
86
00:03:43,964 --> 00:03:46,298
I mean, shit.
What's in the bag?
87
00:03:46,333 --> 00:03:47,634
"Thanks, Nighthawk."
88
00:03:47,668 --> 00:03:49,169
You're pathetic.
89
00:03:49,203 --> 00:03:50,102
Y'all can't be cops.
90
00:03:50,137 --> 00:03:51,570
This must be a fucking joke.
91
00:03:51,605 --> 00:03:52,672
Is this a fucking joke?
You two motherfuckers are really goddamn cops?
92
00:03:52,706 --> 00:03:54,507
Did you see a license
plate on the bike, or anything?
93
00:03:54,541 --> 00:03:56,409
I didn't.
94
00:03:56,444 --> 00:03:58,545
I was so enthralled
with his speech.
95
00:03:58,579 --> 00:04:02,082
I was just wondering if
he had a sidekick or something?
96
00:04:06,187 --> 00:04:08,721
Weigel: aah!
Aah aah aah!
97
00:04:08,755 --> 00:04:10,757
Oh, Rai! Oh, my god!
98
00:04:10,791 --> 00:04:12,658
What did you do?
What's wrong?
99
00:04:12,693 --> 00:04:14,026
What? What?
100
00:04:14,060 --> 00:04:15,528
I taser--
101
00:04:15,562 --> 00:04:18,431
I taser-pronged
myself in the butt.
102
00:04:18,465 --> 00:04:19,498
Oh, god, Rai.
103
00:04:19,533 --> 00:04:20,266
How did you do this?
104
00:04:20,301 --> 00:04:23,035
I was pretending
like I was a cop.
105
00:04:23,069 --> 00:04:24,103
Oh!
106
00:04:24,138 --> 00:04:26,373
1, 2, 3.
107
00:04:26,407 --> 00:04:28,408
Aah! Aah!
108
00:04:28,442 --> 00:04:29,475
Oh, man.
109
00:04:29,510 --> 00:04:32,945
1, 2, 3!
110
00:04:34,615 --> 00:04:36,048
Go.
OK.
111
00:04:36,082 --> 00:04:37,250
Oww!
112
00:04:37,284 --> 00:04:40,319
No? OK, OK, OK, OK, OK,
OK, OK, OK, OK.
113
00:04:40,354 --> 00:04:41,554
Don't bite her.
114
00:04:41,588 --> 00:04:44,524
Ready? Let it go.
115
00:04:44,558 --> 00:04:45,591
Relax.
116
00:04:45,625 --> 00:04:47,293
Aah! Damn it! No.
117
00:04:47,327 --> 00:04:48,661
Did it move
a little bit?
118
00:04:48,696 --> 00:04:49,896
Something moved.
119
00:04:49,930 --> 00:04:52,632
OK. Oh! Oh! Oh!
120
00:04:52,666 --> 00:04:54,867
Wait. It's coming.
Wait. It's coming.
121
00:04:54,901 --> 00:04:56,135
Oh, it's coming.
122
00:04:56,170 --> 00:04:58,138
Oh! Oh god! Oh, god!
123
00:04:58,172 --> 00:04:59,773
Oh, my... aah!
124
00:04:59,807 --> 00:05:01,140
Aah!
125
00:05:01,175 --> 00:05:07,680
Aaaaaah!
126
00:05:08,682 --> 00:05:10,283
Nothing.
Nothing.
127
00:05:10,317 --> 00:05:11,384
Not a thing.
Not a thing.
128
00:05:11,419 --> 00:05:16,189
We have a combined
200 years of law enforcement
129
00:05:16,223 --> 00:05:18,891
Education standing
here right now.
130
00:05:18,925 --> 00:05:20,960
Think we could probably
handle this like--
131
00:05:20,994 --> 00:05:21,995
Declan: call
the fire department.
132
00:05:22,029 --> 00:05:23,028
Fire department.
That's an awesome idea.
133
00:05:23,063 --> 00:05:25,064
Fire department,
fire department, fire department.
134
00:05:33,040 --> 00:05:36,676
Hey! Good to see you.
How you guys doing?
135
00:05:36,710 --> 00:05:37,510
Excuse me.
136
00:05:37,544 --> 00:05:39,378
Hey, fellas, please,
not now, not here.
137
00:05:39,412 --> 00:05:41,080
You can't do this
right here and now.
138
00:05:41,114 --> 00:05:42,014
Come on, not here.
139
00:05:42,049 --> 00:05:43,549
It's my daughter's
wedding, my baby.
140
00:05:43,584 --> 00:05:45,217
Please! What do you want,
me to get on my knees?
141
00:05:45,252 --> 00:05:46,685
No, no, sir. No.
142
00:05:46,720 --> 00:05:47,453
I'll get on my
knees, all right?
143
00:05:47,488 --> 00:05:49,222
No, sir. Come on.
144
00:05:49,256 --> 00:05:50,689
Hide me, will you,
for Christ's sakes?
145
00:05:50,724 --> 00:05:51,691
No. I'm sorry, sir.
Look.
146
00:05:51,725 --> 00:05:53,059
We don't want to do it.
We don't want to do it.
147
00:05:53,093 --> 00:05:55,894
Look at you.
He looks like he enjoy-- Youse want some food?
148
00:05:55,929 --> 00:05:58,698
No. It smells delicious,
but we cannot stay.
149
00:05:58,732 --> 00:06:00,366
We got to take you.
We got to take you in.
150
00:06:00,400 --> 00:06:01,600
Come on.
I'm coming with youse.
151
00:06:01,634 --> 00:06:03,869
Just give me an hour.
What am I asking for?
152
00:06:03,904 --> 00:06:05,471
An hour here, all right?
Sit down.
153
00:06:05,505 --> 00:06:07,406
Enjoy yourselves
right here.
154
00:06:07,441 --> 00:06:08,907
Come on. Let's go.
155
00:06:08,942 --> 00:06:10,844
Where's this stuff
coming from, Mars?
156
00:06:10,878 --> 00:06:12,445
You try this meatball?
157
00:06:13,080 --> 00:06:14,147
Mm, that's, like,
3 different kinds
158
00:06:14,181 --> 00:06:15,348
Of meat on that thing.
159
00:06:15,382 --> 00:06:16,682
That little meatball
is different than
160
00:06:16,716 --> 00:06:17,617
My meatball.
161
00:06:17,651 --> 00:06:18,684
Mm, fire it over.
162
00:06:18,719 --> 00:06:19,786
Here.
163
00:06:19,820 --> 00:06:22,822
Ohh! Oh, my god.
Huh?
164
00:06:22,856 --> 00:06:25,191
Mm. Oh, my god.
Wow!
165
00:06:29,763 --> 00:06:30,997
Terry: can I help you?
166
00:06:31,031 --> 00:06:34,100
Weigel: Terry, you're not
typing anything, Terry.
167
00:06:34,134 --> 00:06:35,601
Yeah, I am.
Typing up books.
168
00:06:35,636 --> 00:06:37,303
All you're doing is
making an annoying sound
169
00:06:37,337 --> 00:06:38,837
With your fingers
on the keyboard.
170
00:06:38,872 --> 00:06:40,706
I'm the fastest typer
in the universe.
171
00:06:40,740 --> 00:06:42,075
Terry, can we
talk for a second?
172
00:06:42,109 --> 00:06:43,075
You know why
we're here?
173
00:06:43,110 --> 00:06:45,745
I think you want to sign
up for a cupcake class.
174
00:06:45,779 --> 00:06:46,512
They have cupcake
classes here?
175
00:06:46,546 --> 00:06:47,480
Yeah. They do...
176
00:06:47,514 --> 00:06:48,814
No,
they don't, Terry.
177
00:06:48,849 --> 00:06:53,353
And then I'm starting
some new ones--Karate
178
00:06:53,387 --> 00:06:54,987
And genital decorating.
179
00:06:55,022 --> 00:06:56,522
Listen to me.
What?
180
00:06:56,557 --> 00:06:58,257
Were you or were you
not pleasuring yourself
181
00:06:58,292 --> 00:06:59,625
In the children's
book nook?
182
00:06:59,659 --> 00:07:01,493
Yes or no?
Did you?
183
00:07:01,528 --> 00:07:02,295
No. I'm asking you,
yes or no?
184
00:07:02,329 --> 00:07:04,397
I'm asking you now.
Did you?
185
00:07:04,431 --> 00:07:06,665
This is not about me.
This is about you.
186
00:07:06,699 --> 00:07:07,967
Were you or were you
not pleasuring yourself
187
00:07:08,001 --> 00:07:09,368
In the children's
book nook?
188
00:07:09,403 --> 00:07:10,402
Yes or no?
189
00:07:10,437 --> 00:07:12,071
You say yes or no.
You be honest.
190
00:07:12,105 --> 00:07:14,106
Yes or no.
No. You say yes or no.
191
00:07:14,140 --> 00:07:15,441
I just did.
Say yes or no.
192
00:07:15,476 --> 00:07:16,843
Yes or no.
One or the other.
193
00:07:16,877 --> 00:07:19,012
One or the other.
One or the other.
194
00:07:19,046 --> 00:07:21,780
Say yes.
No.
195
00:07:21,815 --> 00:07:25,184
Agh! Terry, come on.
Let's go for a ride.
196
00:07:25,218 --> 00:07:26,386
Hold on.
I'm on Facebook.
197
00:07:26,420 --> 00:07:29,321
Shh!
Shh, shh, shh, shh.
198
00:07:29,356 --> 00:07:30,923
Send.
199
00:07:34,361 --> 00:07:36,996
Dangle: mwah ha ha ha!
200
00:07:37,030 --> 00:07:38,230
So, we're getting
everything set
201
00:07:38,264 --> 00:07:42,001
For dinner and a murder,
and guess who is playing
202
00:07:42,035 --> 00:07:43,202
Our lovely corpse.
203
00:07:43,237 --> 00:07:44,937
Hey! Boom.
204
00:07:44,972 --> 00:07:45,971
Ha ha ha!
205
00:07:46,006 --> 00:07:47,173
Pshoo!
206
00:07:47,208 --> 00:07:48,107
Trudy Weigel.
207
00:07:48,141 --> 00:07:50,343
I wanted to get a young
girl from the drama
208
00:07:50,377 --> 00:07:52,211
Department at the
university of Nevada,
209
00:07:52,245 --> 00:07:57,049
Reno, to come play the
corpse, but they passed.
210
00:07:57,083 --> 00:07:59,285
Here's it.
People come in; nosh, nosh, nosh; da da da;
211
00:07:59,319 --> 00:08:01,020
Toast, toast, toast,
"good to see you;" nosh,
212
00:08:01,054 --> 00:08:02,554
Nosh, nosh; "have
a nice time."
213
00:08:02,589 --> 00:08:04,523
I will lead them
into the bathroom.
214
00:08:04,558 --> 00:08:06,492
"Oh, my goodness!
215
00:08:06,526 --> 00:08:07,627
Penelope has
been found dead"
216
00:08:07,661 --> 00:08:09,028
I'm so glad that
you could come.
217
00:08:09,062 --> 00:08:09,862
No, no. You're dead.
You can't.
218
00:08:09,896 --> 00:08:11,797
There's no way you
could say anything.
219
00:08:11,831 --> 00:08:13,099
I think we should put
two things in evidence.
220
00:08:13,133 --> 00:08:13,999
I think this is
a red herring.
221
00:08:14,034 --> 00:08:15,201
You have this.
222
00:08:15,235 --> 00:08:16,302
This is gonna be
a red herring.
223
00:08:16,336 --> 00:08:18,704
You know what that is?
So, obviously--Poom!
224
00:08:18,739 --> 00:08:20,139
Oh, that's not good
for the murder mystery.
225
00:08:20,174 --> 00:08:21,874
No. Impossible.
That's a suicide mystery dinner.
226
00:08:21,909 --> 00:08:23,709
They stabbed you right
through the middle, so we're--
227
00:08:23,744 --> 00:08:25,210
You're gonna stick
a knife in my ribs?
228
00:08:25,245 --> 00:08:27,547
Yeah. There's, like,
a knife. We'll fake it.
229
00:08:27,581 --> 00:08:28,814
They'll fake you with
blood and some tape
230
00:08:28,849 --> 00:08:30,083
And macaroni and stuff.
231
00:08:30,117 --> 00:08:31,217
Oh, with macaroni. OK.
232
00:08:31,251 --> 00:08:32,551
So, we'll cover you
with macaroni and blood
233
00:08:32,585 --> 00:08:34,086
And stick a knife
right here.
234
00:08:34,120 --> 00:08:35,755
OK. Ohh! Aah!
235
00:08:35,789 --> 00:08:36,689
No, but you
don't say it!
236
00:08:36,723 --> 00:08:38,624
You don't say anything!
God.
237
00:08:38,658 --> 00:08:39,758
So, let's say
here's what happened.
238
00:08:39,793 --> 00:08:42,561
The murderer came in,
macaroni, macaroni, macaroni...
239
00:08:42,596 --> 00:08:46,098
Macaroni, macaroni, macaroni,
macaroni, macaroni, macaroni.
240
00:08:46,133 --> 00:08:49,067
Teeth, teeth,
teeth, teeth. Take that, bitch.
241
00:08:49,102 --> 00:08:50,403
Ow, not my teeth.
Not my teeth.
242
00:08:50,437 --> 00:08:51,771
Then into the face with
the toilet, and then
243
00:08:51,805 --> 00:08:54,073
They do it again, again.
244
00:08:54,108 --> 00:08:55,942
So, she--
Ah, it's drowning.
245
00:08:55,976 --> 00:08:57,009
Oh, then she drowns.
246
00:08:57,044 --> 00:08:58,610
It's a misdirection.
247
00:08:58,645 --> 00:09:02,047
It was always
drowning in the toilet.
248
00:09:02,081 --> 00:09:03,449
I like it very much.
I do, too,
249
00:09:03,484 --> 00:09:05,184
And then,
you know what? What's that?
250
00:09:05,219 --> 00:09:07,953
I brought this so they
can check and see if
251
00:09:07,988 --> 00:09:09,088
I've been raped.
252
00:09:09,123 --> 00:09:11,724
That would be fun
for the guests.
253
00:09:11,758 --> 00:09:13,325
I feel like that puts
a really dark turn
254
00:09:13,359 --> 00:09:16,295
On things,
don't you think?
255
00:09:16,330 --> 00:09:17,363
I don't have a
lot of parties.
256
00:09:17,397 --> 00:09:19,064
I just feel like that's
gonna ruin dessert.
257
00:09:27,040 --> 00:09:29,375
Coco rico.
Coco rico. OK.
258
00:09:29,409 --> 00:09:31,444
We're back, El
Chupacabra, the cold
259
00:09:31,478 --> 00:09:38,951
Sucker, KPBA 102.0.
?qu?� pasa, chupi chupi?
260
00:09:38,985 --> 00:09:41,820
Hola. Estamos listos,
mi gente.
261
00:09:41,855 --> 00:09:45,524
Yeah. Yo soy listo para
poner my face into
262
00:09:45,558 --> 00:09:46,759
Your breasts.
263
00:09:46,793 --> 00:09:52,064
Ah, Jorge Jenaba,
you are incorrigible.
264
00:09:52,099 --> 00:09:53,365
Well, we are here today.
265
00:09:53,400 --> 00:09:55,901
We have the Reno sheriff
department here to
266
00:09:55,936 --> 00:09:59,505
Talk about...
[imitates motor]
267
00:09:59,540 --> 00:10:02,075
Boat safety.
268
00:10:02,109 --> 00:10:04,310
??arriba, arriba, arriba!
269
00:10:04,344 --> 00:10:07,380
The Reno sheriff
department remind you to
270
00:10:07,414 --> 00:10:11,350
Register your boat
because it's the law.
271
00:10:11,384 --> 00:10:12,885
Hey!
272
00:10:12,920 --> 00:10:14,153
Register boat.
Register boat.
273
00:10:14,187 --> 00:10:16,322
Ta-Da.
274
00:10:17,791 --> 00:10:19,959
?qu?� es eso?
275
00:10:19,993 --> 00:10:21,093
?qu?� est?�s?
276
00:10:21,127 --> 00:10:22,995
What are you doing?
277
00:10:23,029 --> 00:10:25,431
You come into my
house... yeah.
278
00:10:25,465 --> 00:10:31,304
Asi, dressed like a
cartoon of my people.
279
00:10:31,338 --> 00:10:32,304
Oh.
280
00:10:32,338 --> 00:10:35,274
It is like you come into
my church and pull down
281
00:10:35,309 --> 00:10:38,377
Your police pants
and make diarrhea all
282
00:10:38,411 --> 00:10:40,379
Over Jesucristo.
283
00:10:40,414 --> 00:10:42,181
I did not mean to
diarrhea on the messiah.
284
00:10:42,215 --> 00:10:44,283
You apologize to me.
285
00:10:44,318 --> 00:10:45,384
I apologize.
286
00:10:45,418 --> 00:10:47,553
You apologize
to Chupi chupi...
287
00:10:47,587 --> 00:10:48,921
I apologize.
288
00:10:48,955 --> 00:10:52,825
And then I will say
to you... it's a broma!
289
00:10:52,859 --> 00:10:55,895
I Ashton Kutchered you!
290
00:10:55,929 --> 00:10:58,363
Are you kidding me?
Are you kidding me?
291
00:10:58,398 --> 00:11:01,000
Ha ha! Guaca, guaca,
guaca, guaca...
292
00:11:01,034 --> 00:11:02,735
Agagaga agagaga!
293
00:11:02,769 --> 00:11:04,136
Don't make
that noise! OK.
294
00:11:11,678 --> 00:11:18,150
[Organ playing]
295
00:11:18,184 --> 00:11:20,719
Mwah ha ha ha!
Mwah ha ha ha!
296
00:11:20,754 --> 00:11:26,392
Welcome to dinner
and a murder.
297
00:11:26,426 --> 00:11:27,759
I'm gonna work on that,
but I think it's pretty scary.
298
00:11:27,794 --> 00:11:30,529
Oh, lord, massa Jim,
some of the other slaves
299
00:11:30,564 --> 00:11:31,597
Done went down
by the creek--
300
00:11:31,631 --> 00:11:32,598
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa!
301
00:11:32,632 --> 00:11:33,532
Time, time, time,
time, time!
302
00:11:33,566 --> 00:11:34,734
Timeout! Timeout!
303
00:11:34,768 --> 00:11:36,702
What are you doing?
What?
304
00:11:36,736 --> 00:11:37,870
What are you doing?
305
00:11:37,904 --> 00:11:40,939
This is my costume
for the party, huh?
306
00:11:40,974 --> 00:11:43,709
You're supposed to
be mrs. Haberdash, my servant.
307
00:11:43,744 --> 00:11:45,177
Why are you dressed
like miss Frizzy
308
00:11:45,211 --> 00:11:46,078
From "Roots"?
309
00:11:46,113 --> 00:11:47,513
Because I thought
this was what I was
310
00:11:47,548 --> 00:11:48,848
Supposed to wear.
311
00:11:48,882 --> 00:11:49,948
Please don't do that.
Please don't do that. Please don't do that.
312
00:11:49,982 --> 00:11:51,818
I's gonna go get the
door for you, massa.
313
00:11:51,852 --> 00:11:55,354
Everybody is gonna
think it was my idea. Ah, crap.
314
00:11:55,388 --> 00:11:57,056
[Organ plays]
315
00:11:57,090 --> 00:12:01,894
Massa Jim, I would
like to present massa Leslie Frost.
316
00:12:01,928 --> 00:12:03,996
Do you love it?
Do you love it?
317
00:12:04,031 --> 00:12:06,232
It is so cute.
Wasn't my idea.
318
00:12:06,266 --> 00:12:07,232
She's supposed to
be mrs. Haberdash,
319
00:12:07,267 --> 00:12:08,067
My faithful servant.
320
00:12:08,101 --> 00:12:09,635
Period detail.
I love it.
321
00:12:09,670 --> 00:12:10,869
Don't you wish you
were alive then?
322
00:12:10,904 --> 00:12:12,304
Oh, I know. In.
Come he.
323
00:12:12,338 --> 00:12:14,306
I love it.
Somebody has still got--
324
00:12:14,340 --> 00:12:16,842
Feel these hands
and the shoulders.
325
00:12:16,876 --> 00:12:18,610
Oh, my god,
feel these lats.
326
00:12:18,645 --> 00:12:19,412
Feel these lats on
this guy, these lats and traps.
327
00:12:19,446 --> 00:12:20,646
Are you working
lats and traps?
328
00:12:20,680 --> 00:12:21,347
Absolutely.
329
00:12:21,381 --> 00:12:22,248
Who went lats
and traps on me?
330
00:12:22,282 --> 00:12:23,315
Look at you, you
handsome devil.
331
00:12:23,349 --> 00:12:24,817
Thank you. Thank you.
332
00:12:24,852 --> 00:12:27,152
If anybody wants to rape
me down in the slave
333
00:12:27,186 --> 00:12:29,555
Quarters, just
let me know.
334
00:12:29,589 --> 00:12:30,490
Oh, I love it.
OK.
335
00:12:30,524 --> 00:12:31,223
Nobody is gonna
rape you down in
336
00:12:31,257 --> 00:12:32,225
The slave quarters.
337
00:12:32,259 --> 00:12:33,258
[Doorbell rings]
338
00:12:33,293 --> 00:12:35,795
I's better get the door,
huh, massa Jim?
339
00:12:35,829 --> 00:12:36,962
Oh, my goodness
gracious.
340
00:12:36,997 --> 00:12:38,897
Not my idea!
341
00:12:38,932 --> 00:12:43,235
I's would like
to introduce mrs. Debbie Dangle.
342
00:12:43,270 --> 00:12:46,472
Hello, Deb.
Look at diva.
343
00:12:46,506 --> 00:12:50,643
And may I present my
fiance--Gary Werner.
344
00:12:50,677 --> 00:12:53,145
Coming, my love!
345
00:12:53,179 --> 00:12:54,380
Hello.
346
00:12:54,414 --> 00:12:57,483
Mwah, mwah, mwah.
347
00:12:57,517 --> 00:12:59,818
Can't keep our hands
off each other.
348
00:12:59,853 --> 00:13:01,453
Oh, hello, strangers.
349
00:13:01,488 --> 00:13:05,791
Number one, number two,
number always forever and more.
350
00:13:05,826 --> 00:13:07,126
Third time
is the charm.
351
00:13:07,160 --> 00:13:09,261
Ha ha!
Isn't it, though?
352
00:13:09,296 --> 00:13:10,429
May I offer you
a glass of white?
353
00:13:10,463 --> 00:13:12,164
Oh, yes.
Sure.
354
00:13:12,198 --> 00:13:13,598
Mrs. Haberdash?
355
00:13:13,633 --> 00:13:15,467
Oh. Yes,
massa Jim.
356
00:13:15,501 --> 00:13:17,770
Let me gets
that for you.
357
00:13:17,804 --> 00:13:20,506
How campy.
I love it.
358
00:13:20,540 --> 00:13:21,440
OK, OK.
We all love it. We all love it.
359
00:13:21,474 --> 00:13:24,109
Get me a white
wine, slave.
360
00:13:24,144 --> 00:13:25,244
Ha ha! I love it.
361
00:13:25,278 --> 00:13:27,079
Get her a wine, or we'll
take a switch to you.
362
00:13:27,113 --> 00:13:28,280
I'll take a switch
to your hide.
363
00:13:28,314 --> 00:13:31,183
I brought a switch.
364
00:13:31,218 --> 00:13:33,386
OK. That was too much.
We crossed a line.
365
00:13:33,420 --> 00:13:34,286
We crossed a line
with the one.
366
00:13:34,320 --> 00:13:34,953
That was too much.
367
00:13:34,988 --> 00:13:35,855
No one is gonna
switch you.
368
00:13:35,889 --> 00:13:37,256
No one is
switching your hide.
369
00:13:42,696 --> 00:13:46,499
This is what we do.
We check nose, OK?
370
00:13:46,533 --> 00:13:48,400
That's nice.
Wow.
371
00:13:48,435 --> 00:13:50,969
Check the legs,
density of the grape.
372
00:13:51,003 --> 00:13:52,171
That's nice, huh?
373
00:13:52,205 --> 00:13:52,804
Huh.
374
00:13:52,839 --> 00:13:55,508
Now we taste it.
375
00:13:59,145 --> 00:14:01,180
Ah, that's good.
376
00:14:01,214 --> 00:14:03,782
Wow, that's a
good Merlot. Wow.
377
00:14:03,816 --> 00:14:05,584
Youse done?
How was it, eh?
378
00:14:05,618 --> 00:14:06,786
It was great, right?
379
00:14:06,820 --> 00:14:08,320
Absolutely delicious,
sir, but--I'm sorry-- We got to go.
380
00:14:08,354 --> 00:14:10,055
One other thing.
All right.
381
00:14:10,089 --> 00:14:11,057
I'm coming.
I'm coming.
382
00:14:11,091 --> 00:14:13,258
I got to dance
"daddy's little girl"
383
00:14:13,293 --> 00:14:14,059
With my daughter.
384
00:14:14,094 --> 00:14:14,994
I got to do that.
385
00:14:15,028 --> 00:14:16,795
We can lose our job
already just for cutting
386
00:14:16,829 --> 00:14:17,462
You this much slack.
387
00:14:17,497 --> 00:14:18,897
We got to go.
We got to go.
388
00:14:18,932 --> 00:14:20,999
I'll tell you what.
Say hello to my niece.
389
00:14:21,034 --> 00:14:23,469
Apollonia, vene
qua, over here.
390
00:14:23,503 --> 00:14:24,770
No. We don't want to meet
your little niece.
391
00:14:24,804 --> 00:14:25,937
I'm sure
she's adorable.
392
00:14:25,972 --> 00:14:27,506
Come here.
That's my niece.
393
00:14:27,541 --> 00:14:28,574
Wow, no. We can't.
We got to--
394
00:14:28,608 --> 00:14:30,643
We got to go.
We got to go. No.
395
00:14:30,677 --> 00:14:36,382
Sit down. Sit,
take a seat.
396
00:14:36,416 --> 00:14:37,149
10 minutes.
397
00:14:37,183 --> 00:14:38,751
10 minutes,
one song.
398
00:14:38,785 --> 00:14:40,553
Cin cin.
Hey, ching ching.
399
00:14:40,587 --> 00:14:42,221
Ching ching.
Ha ha ha!
400
00:14:47,060 --> 00:14:48,227
Ohh!
401
00:14:48,261 --> 00:14:49,094
Ahh!
402
00:14:49,128 --> 00:14:51,196
So, what's it
like in Italy?
403
00:14:51,231 --> 00:14:54,166
I have no idea.
I'm from Long Island.
404
00:14:54,200 --> 00:14:55,534
Oh, yeah, but I heard
that that's really
405
00:14:55,569 --> 00:14:56,669
Nice, though.
406
00:14:56,703 --> 00:14:59,371
Supposed to be beautiful.
Supposed to be beautiful.
407
00:14:59,405 --> 00:15:01,773
Man: ?
for the rest of my life ?
408
00:15:01,808 --> 00:15:06,979
?
I will love you every second we're together ?
409
00:15:11,351 --> 00:15:13,919
Dangle:
welcome to Fontleby manor.
410
00:15:13,954 --> 00:15:17,790
I am lord Chance
Fontleby, fifth heir
411
00:15:17,824 --> 00:15:21,893
Of Fontleby manor here
on the misty moors
412
00:15:21,928 --> 00:15:23,295
Of Scotland...
413
00:15:23,330 --> 00:15:25,097
Ooh!
Ooh! Ooh!
414
00:15:25,131 --> 00:15:27,333
Aka the Reno historical
society, which we must
415
00:15:27,367 --> 00:15:29,668
Be out of by 11 PM,
and that's a hard out.
416
00:15:29,702 --> 00:15:31,937
For real, we have to be out
by 11:00, really, no joke.
417
00:15:31,971 --> 00:15:34,206
That's good.
We want to get home and get busy, anyway.
418
00:15:34,240 --> 00:15:36,442
We're trying
to make a baby.
419
00:15:36,476 --> 00:15:37,309
God bless.
420
00:15:37,343 --> 00:15:39,444
And I don't know
nothin' 'bout birthin'
421
00:15:39,479 --> 00:15:40,346
No babies.
422
00:15:40,380 --> 00:15:42,280
Oh!
423
00:15:42,315 --> 00:15:44,549
No, you don't.
No, you don't.
424
00:15:44,584 --> 00:15:45,718
Dance for us.
425
00:15:45,752 --> 00:15:47,152
Dance, minstrel,
dance.
426
00:15:47,187 --> 00:15:49,522
You know what, bitch?
I'm his slave, not yours.
427
00:15:49,556 --> 00:15:52,191
Are you gonna cut me?
Yes. I am.
428
00:15:52,225 --> 00:15:54,293
Goddamn it!
429
00:15:54,327 --> 00:15:56,595
Gary--
Gary!
430
00:15:56,630 --> 00:15:58,364
Look. I'm sorry about
all the slave stuff.
431
00:15:58,398 --> 00:15:59,531
Remember that
Applebee's coupon I was
432
00:15:59,566 --> 00:16:00,833
Gonna give you?
Mm-Hmm.
433
00:16:00,867 --> 00:16:03,635
We're gonna go
75 on that, OK?
434
00:16:03,670 --> 00:16:04,303
That sound good?
435
00:16:04,337 --> 00:16:05,838
That's fine.
OK. Cool.
436
00:16:10,777 --> 00:16:12,377
Come on, grandpa.
437
00:16:12,412 --> 00:16:14,079
I'm going out tonight,
and I can't afford
438
00:16:14,113 --> 00:16:18,150
Regular drugs because
of the sluggish economy.
439
00:16:18,184 --> 00:16:19,451
I need these
prescription drugs
440
00:16:19,485 --> 00:16:20,653
For my heart.
441
00:16:20,687 --> 00:16:22,954
Aw, fuck you,
grandpa.
442
00:16:22,989 --> 00:16:24,557
Give me the drugs!
443
00:16:24,591 --> 00:16:28,294
Uh!
Uhh...
444
00:16:28,328 --> 00:16:29,661
We've all seen
this scenario play out
445
00:16:29,696 --> 00:16:32,764
Too many times,
senior abuse, and all
446
00:16:32,799 --> 00:16:33,933
For a quick high.
447
00:16:33,967 --> 00:16:34,967
That's right.
448
00:16:35,001 --> 00:16:36,935
In Washoe county,
there were over 5,000
449
00:16:36,970 --> 00:16:39,038
Cases of senior
abuse last year.
450
00:16:39,072 --> 00:16:43,375
Yes, over 5,000 cases--
Senior citizens beaten
451
00:16:43,409 --> 00:16:45,210
Stabbed, raped, and
bludgeoned for their
452
00:16:45,244 --> 00:16:47,146
Prescription
medications, and most
453
00:16:47,180 --> 00:16:50,449
Of the drugs they have
won't even get you high.
454
00:16:50,483 --> 00:16:51,750
The drugs they're
taking are to keep their
455
00:16:51,784 --> 00:16:53,585
Arteries functioning
and so they can pee.
456
00:16:53,620 --> 00:16:55,687
They're not good for
recreational use,
457
00:16:55,722 --> 00:16:58,223
So let's make senior
abuse just like grandpa--
458
00:16:58,257 --> 00:16:59,992
A thing of the past.
459
00:17:00,026 --> 00:17:03,195
This has been a
message from the Reno sheriff's department.
460
00:17:06,399 --> 00:17:08,266
All right, guys.
Let's go.
461
00:17:08,301 --> 00:17:09,501
Just do it quietly,
not in front
462
00:17:09,535 --> 00:17:11,369
Of everybody, all right?
463
00:17:11,404 --> 00:17:13,905
Go ahead. Go ahead.
464
00:17:13,940 --> 00:17:15,273
You know what?
465
00:17:15,308 --> 00:17:16,375
Not today.
466
00:17:16,409 --> 00:17:17,142
You kept your word.
467
00:17:17,176 --> 00:17:18,443
You came back to us,
and we should
468
00:17:18,477 --> 00:17:19,411
Reward that.
469
00:17:19,445 --> 00:17:20,812
We're not gonna arrest
you on this, the blessed
470
00:17:20,846 --> 00:17:22,181
Day of your daughter's
wedding.
471
00:17:22,215 --> 00:17:23,148
Enjoy your
grandchildren.
472
00:17:23,183 --> 00:17:24,382
Are you kidding?
473
00:17:24,417 --> 00:17:25,117
Oh, wow.
474
00:17:25,151 --> 00:17:27,386
Just stay out of
trouble, and we
475
00:17:27,420 --> 00:17:28,587
Never saw you.
476
00:17:28,621 --> 00:17:29,421
We never saw you.
477
00:17:29,456 --> 00:17:31,556
And say good-bye to
your lovely niece
478
00:17:31,590 --> 00:17:32,491
For me, please.
479
00:17:32,525 --> 00:17:34,460
Oh, no, see?
No. OK.
480
00:17:34,494 --> 00:17:35,794
It's all right.
It's all right.
481
00:17:35,828 --> 00:17:37,228
You big guy.
Thank you.
482
00:17:37,263 --> 00:17:37,963
All right.
483
00:17:37,997 --> 00:17:40,299
Oh, no.
Look at this.
484
00:17:40,333 --> 00:17:43,135
You feed the whole
precinct, huh?
485
00:17:43,970 --> 00:17:44,702
Ha ha!
486
00:17:44,737 --> 00:17:45,404
I didn't think it
was gonna work.
487
00:17:45,438 --> 00:17:46,372
What did I
tell you, man?
488
00:17:46,406 --> 00:17:47,272
Italian weddings.
489
00:17:47,306 --> 00:17:48,707
You just go.
You stand in the back.
490
00:17:48,741 --> 00:17:50,475
Pretty soon, some
guys comes up, "hey, I
491
00:17:50,510 --> 00:17:51,176
Didn't do it.
492
00:17:51,210 --> 00:17:52,310
Please, if I could eat--
493
00:17:52,345 --> 00:17:54,245
Have a chair.
Beautiful.
494
00:17:54,280 --> 00:17:55,314
I'm gonna be eating
this for 3 days.
495
00:17:55,348 --> 00:17:57,849
Works every time.
Works every time.
496
00:18:02,121 --> 00:18:04,156
And drink.
497
00:18:14,567 --> 00:18:15,434
No.
498
00:18:15,468 --> 00:18:17,569
Why don't we--
499
00:18:17,604 --> 00:18:19,772
We'll do this
5 times really fast.
500
00:18:19,806 --> 00:18:23,875
We'll do that
and then--Boo!
501
00:18:24,978 --> 00:18:26,244
Nothing?
No.
502
00:18:26,279 --> 00:18:28,513
Hup! Hup!
503
00:18:28,548 --> 00:18:29,781
Let's double
this up. OK.
504
00:18:29,815 --> 00:18:31,316
Hup!
505
00:18:31,350 --> 00:18:33,084
Hup!
506
00:18:33,119 --> 00:18:34,420
Hup!
507
00:18:34,454 --> 00:18:36,488
Up. Form. Get your
form up. Boom.
508
00:18:36,522 --> 00:18:38,690
There. Up. There. Boom.
509
00:18:38,724 --> 00:18:42,627
"Nutcracker,"
"nutcracker,"
510
00:18:42,662 --> 00:18:44,763
"Swan lake," and...
511
00:18:44,797 --> 00:18:46,164
Come on.
512
00:18:46,198 --> 00:18:49,268
Come on.
513
00:18:49,302 --> 00:18:51,003
Mm, mm!
514
00:18:51,037 --> 00:18:52,270
Rgh!
515
00:18:52,305 --> 00:18:54,373
Come on!
516
00:18:55,241 --> 00:18:55,907
That was so close.
517
00:18:55,942 --> 00:18:56,708
I feel like
we're right there.
518
00:18:56,743 --> 00:18:57,943
I feel like I'm
right there.
519
00:18:57,977 --> 00:19:00,045
Hup, hup.
520
00:19:00,079 --> 00:19:00,979
Arms up there,
arms up there.
521
00:19:01,013 --> 00:19:03,281
Hup, hup, hup.
522
00:19:03,316 --> 00:19:04,483
Hup.
523
00:19:04,517 --> 00:19:06,451
[Ping pong ball clatters]
524
00:19:06,485 --> 00:19:08,486
Oh.
525
00:19:08,521 --> 00:19:11,123
All right.
All right.
526
00:19:11,157 --> 00:19:14,626
Who's the lucky
bachelor?
527
00:19:16,128 --> 00:19:18,230
OK. 4 more to go.
528
00:19:21,233 --> 00:19:23,335
[Ping pong balls clatter]
529
00:19:31,978 --> 00:19:34,312
Williams:
well, since we short on time, massa, maybe we
530
00:19:34,347 --> 00:19:35,613
Better get to
fixing to leave.
531
00:19:35,648 --> 00:19:36,481
I don't want to
wait anymore.
532
00:19:36,516 --> 00:19:37,549
I'm not waiting for
any more latecomers.
533
00:19:37,583 --> 00:19:38,317
Let's just do it.
534
00:19:38,351 --> 00:19:39,851
First, let us have
a little toast,
535
00:19:39,886 --> 00:19:41,420
And I'll pick a
murderer, OK?
536
00:19:41,454 --> 00:19:42,288
Everybody good?
537
00:19:42,322 --> 00:19:43,789
Yeah.
I don't remember where I left--
538
00:19:43,823 --> 00:19:45,758
No. I think this is
definitely yours.
539
00:19:45,792 --> 00:19:46,725
Oh, OK.
All right.
540
00:19:46,759 --> 00:19:47,826
That one is yours.
All right.
541
00:19:47,861 --> 00:19:51,996
Let us toast to
our wonderful once
542
00:19:52,031 --> 00:19:52,964
And future wife.
543
00:19:52,999 --> 00:19:57,169
And to our
future child.
544
00:19:57,203 --> 00:20:01,273
And to...
Cabo... San Lucas.
545
00:20:01,308 --> 00:20:05,610
Sammy Hagar,
and... to murder.
546
00:20:05,645 --> 00:20:08,813
To murder.
547
00:20:10,216 --> 00:20:12,017
Ah, very good.
548
00:20:12,051 --> 00:20:13,785
You wouldn't believe
it's 3 bucks a bottle.
549
00:20:13,820 --> 00:20:14,652
That is local.
550
00:20:14,687 --> 00:20:17,956
$3.00 for a huge--
551
00:20:17,990 --> 00:20:20,191
You don't taste it.
552
00:20:20,226 --> 00:20:21,793
Deb?
It's earthy, isn't it?
553
00:20:21,827 --> 00:20:25,230
Deb? Deb?
554
00:20:25,264 --> 00:20:26,966
What's going on?
555
00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:27,599
She's dead.
556
00:20:27,633 --> 00:20:29,868
Yay!
557
00:20:29,902 --> 00:20:31,002
It's fun!
Fabulous.
558
00:20:31,036 --> 00:20:31,636
No, no.
559
00:20:31,671 --> 00:20:32,337
No.
560
00:20:32,372 --> 00:20:36,275
Everyone... she's
really dead.
561
00:20:36,309 --> 00:20:38,010
You're
overemoting now.
562
00:20:38,044 --> 00:20:40,212
Feel her!
She's dead, goddamn it! She's dead!
563
00:20:40,246 --> 00:20:42,014
Oh, my god, she's
colder than normal.
564
00:20:42,048 --> 00:20:44,048
She's dead.
Aah!
565
00:20:44,083 --> 00:20:47,553
Aah! Aah!
566
00:20:47,587 --> 00:20:48,620
Oh, my god!
567
00:20:48,655 --> 00:20:49,921
Don't move,
don't touch her. Don't touch anything.
568
00:20:49,956 --> 00:20:51,589
Weigel: Jim,
what the fuck?
569
00:20:51,624 --> 00:20:52,858
When are we gonna get
to the murder part?
570
00:20:52,892 --> 00:20:55,694
I've been laying on
the bathroom floor for 3 hours.
571
00:20:55,728 --> 00:20:59,464
[Thunder]
572
00:21:00,300 --> 00:21:02,567
Captioning made possible by
MTV networks
573
00:21:04,237 --> 00:21:06,371
1, 2, 3, go!
574
00:21:06,405 --> 00:21:07,272
[Zap]
575
00:21:07,306 --> 00:21:10,842
Wow!
Make her dance. Make her dance.
576
00:21:10,877 --> 00:21:13,011
Like a marionette.
OK.
577
00:21:13,046 --> 00:21:15,480
[All humming]
578
00:21:15,514 --> 00:21:17,549
Shock her!
[Zap]
579
00:21:19,652 --> 00:21:21,653
Shock her!
[Zap]
580
00:21:22,955 --> 00:21:23,956
Fire department!
Fire department!
581
00:21:23,990 --> 00:21:26,325
Fire department!
Fire department! Fire department!
582
00:21:26,359 --> 00:21:27,860
This lady was out.
583
00:21:27,894 --> 00:21:29,628
She, uh--
584
00:21:29,662 --> 00:21:30,728
How's it going,
fellas?
585
00:21:30,763 --> 00:21:31,764
Hey, guys.
Hey, guys.
586
00:21:31,798 --> 00:21:33,665
We did this again.
587
00:21:33,700 --> 00:21:34,833
It happened
again.
588
00:21:34,883 --> 00:21:39,433
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