Original subtitles

>> look alive, people!

>> look alive, people!

>> look alive, people! For the next 24 hours we will be

For the next 24 hours we will be

For the next 24 hours we will be entrusted with the most

Entrusted with the most

Entrusted with the most dangerous criminal mastermind

Dangerous criminal mastermind

Dangerous criminal mastermind the sierras has ever known.

The sierras has ever known.

The sierras has ever known. In 24 hours' time we will hand

In 24 hours' time we will hand

In 24 hours' time we will hand him over to the federal bureau

Him over to the federal bureau

Him over to the federal bureau of investigations. Until that

Of investigations. Until that

Of investigations. Until that time, we must be vigilant. Watch

Time, we must be vigilant. Watch

Time, we must be vigilant. Watch your back. Watch your partner's

Your back. Watch your partner's

Your back. Watch your partner's back. This man is a genius. He

Back. This man is a genius. He

Back. This man is a genius. He will get inside your head...

Will get inside your head...

Will get inside your head... And he will find a way to

And he will find a way to

And he will find a way to escape. What are we gonna do?!

Escape. What are we gonna do?!

Escape. What are we gonna do?! >> wash your back!

>> wash your back!

>> wash your back! >> be vigilant, sir!

>> be vigilant, sir!

>> be vigilant, sir! [all talking at once]

[all talking at once]

[all talking at once] >> don't let him see our fear!

>> don't let him see our fear!

>> don't let him see our fear! >> ok, well, here's what I

>> ok, well, here's what I

>> ok, well, here's what I was gonna say.

Was gonna say.

Was gonna say. >> gimme an "a"!

>> gimme an "a"!

>> gimme an "a"! >> no. Stop it. And watch.

>> no. Stop it. And watch.

>> no. Stop it. And watch. Not wash. No one's washing

Not wash. No one's washing

Not wash. No one's washing anyone. Battle stations!

Anyone. Battle stations!

Anyone. Battle stations! [cocking rifles]

[cocking rifles]

[cocking rifles] [siren bursts]

>> uhh!

>> you guys! Ha ha ha ha ha.

>> you guys! Ha ha ha ha ha.

>> you guys! Ha ha ha ha ha. >> move him out! Move him

>> move him out! Move him

>> move him out! Move him out! Move him out! Move him out!

Out! Move him out! Move him out!

Out! Move him out! Move him out! Go!

Go!

Go! >> wiegel, you're with child!

>> wiegel, you're with child!

>> wiegel, you're with child! Oh, my gosh, you look...

Oh, my gosh, you look...

Oh, my gosh, you look... You're radiant!

You're radiant!

You're radiant! >> thank you.

>> thank you.

>> thank you. >> don't engage him. Don't

>> don't engage him. Don't

>> don't engage him. Don't engage him.

Engage him.

Engage him. >> those glasses are so you.

>> those glasses are so you.

>> those glasses are so you. >> do not engage him.

>> do not engage him.

>> do not engage him. >> thank you. Thank--oh.

>> thank you. Thank--oh.

>> thank you. Thank--oh. >> don't say thank you.

>> don't say thank you.

>> don't say thank you. >> I just want you to know

>> I just want you to know

>> I just want you to know that on my part, there's no hard

That on my part, there's no hard

That on my part, there's no hard feelings.

[captioning made possible by

[captioning made possible by

[captioning made possible by mtv networks]

>> good morning. We are from

>> good morning. We are from

>> good morning. We are from the department of homeland

The department of homeland

The department of homeland security. My name is captain

Security. My name is captain

Security. My name is captain duane hernandez. Focus, people.

Duane hernandez. Focus, people.

Duane hernandez. Focus, people. This is about fighting the

This is about fighting the

This is about fighting the terrorists. This is the face of

Terrorists. This is the face of

Terrorists. This is the face of freedom! This is the face of

Freedom! This is the face of

Freedom! This is the face of freedom!

Freedom!

Freedom! [applause]

[applause]

[applause] >> we were robbed over the

>> we were robbed over the

>> we were robbed over the weekend. They got away with

Weekend. They got away with

Weekend. They got away with $300,000's worth of evidence

$300,000's worth of evidence

$300,000's worth of evidence from the evidence room, and most

From the evidence room, and most

From the evidence room, and most of the phones and computers.

Of the phones and computers.

Of the phones and computers. That person who called himself

That person who called himself

That person who called himself duane hernandez is apparently

Duane hernandez is apparently

Duane hernandez is apparently "spanish mike" alverez.

>> I'm just worried that...

>> I'm just worried that...

>> I'm just worried that... You're gonna get in with spanish

You're gonna get in with spanish

You're gonna get in with spanish mike, and he's gonna talk you

Mike, and he's gonna talk you

Mike, and he's gonna talk you out of your panties in about 30

Out of your panties in about 30

Out of your panties in about 30 seconds flat.

Seconds flat.

Seconds flat. >> jim, in fairness, it's

>> jim, in fairness, it's

>> jim, in fairness, it's not that hard to talk me out

Not that hard to talk me out

Not that hard to talk me out of my panties no matter who you

Of my panties no matter who you

Of my panties no matter who you are.

Are.

Are. >> true.

>> good afternoon,

>> good afternoon,

>> good afternoon, detective wiegel. [coughs]

Detective wiegel. [coughs]

Detective wiegel. [coughs] I have hay fever. My--my vocal

I have hay fever. My--my vocal

I have hay fever. My--my vocal cords get affected.

Cords get affected.

Cords get affected. >> are you ok?

>> are you ok?

>> are you ok? >> yes. Oh, it's good

>> yes. Oh, it's good

>> yes. Oh, it's good to see you.

To see you.

To see you. >> you, too.

>> you, too.

>> you, too. >> look at you.

>> look at you.

>> look at you. >> [chuckles] here I am.

>> [chuckles] here I am.

>> [chuckles] here I am. >> wow!

>> wow!

>> wow! [wiegel laughs nervously]

[wiegel laughs nervously]

[wiegel laughs nervously] >> I'm not supposed to

>> I'm not supposed to

>> I'm not supposed to actually engage you in any...

Actually engage you in any...

Actually engage you in any... >> oh, I understand.

>> oh, I understand.

>> oh, I understand. >> ...Sort of conversation,

>> ...Sort of conversation,

>> ...Sort of conversation, so...

So...

So... >> I understand.

>> I understand.

>> I understand. >> hello. Nice to see you,

>> hello. Nice to see you,

>> hello. Nice to see you, and--

And--

And-- >> may I show you something?

>> may I show you something?

>> may I show you something? You tell me if you like it.

You tell me if you like it.

You tell me if you like it. >> oh...It's beautiful.

>> oh...It's beautiful.

>> oh...It's beautiful. >> like--like you are.

>> like--like you are.

>> like--like you are. >> thank you.

>> thank you.

>> thank you. >> you know, wiegel,

>> you know, wiegel,

>> you know, wiegel, I never--I never told anyone

I never--I never told anyone

I never--I never told anyone this, but...

This, but...

This, but... I never knew the taste of my

I never knew the taste of my

I never knew the taste of my mother's breast.

Mother's breast.

Mother's breast. >> oh, no.

>> oh, no.

>> oh, no. >> and look where I am now.

>> and look where I am now.

>> and look where I am now. >> oh!

>> oh!

>> oh! >> I was fed by the

>> I was fed by the

>> I was fed by the village wet nurse. Her name was

Village wet nurse. Her name was

Village wet nurse. Her name was marta, but everyone called her

Marta, but everyone called her

Marta, but everyone called her sarsaparilla. She had areolas

Sarsaparilla. She had areolas

Sarsaparilla. She had areolas the size of half dollars.

The size of half dollars.

The size of half dollars. And I bonded with her instead of

And I bonded with her instead of

And I bonded with her instead of my mama.

My mama.

My mama. >> oh, god, that's

>> oh, god, that's

>> oh, god, that's heartbreaking.

Heartbreaking.

Heartbreaking. >> I would like another chance.

>> I would like another chance.

>> I would like another chance. >> I know.

>> I know.

>> I know. >> all I need is for

>> all I need is for

>> all I need is for you to slip the key through this

You to slip the key through this

You to slip the key through this little opening here. That's all

Little opening here. That's all

Little opening here. That's all I need.

I need.

I need. [crying] wiegel, help me!

[crying] wiegel, help me!

[crying] wiegel, help me! >> jim--jim said no

>> jim--jim said no

>> jim--jim said no talking, don't engage him, don't

Talking, don't engage him, don't

Talking, don't engage him, don't even look at him. But he didn't

Even look at him. But he didn't

Even look at him. But he didn't say anything about holding

Say anything about holding

Say anything about holding hands. So...Quickly.

>> thank you. Can you

>> thank you. Can you

>> thank you. Can you hold something else?

Hold something else?

Hold something else? >> sure. Oh, no. No, no,

>> sure. Oh, no. No, no,

>> sure. Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no. Definitely not.

>> sheriff's department.

>> sheriff's department.

>> sheriff's department. Did someone call the sheriff's

Did someone call the sheriff's

Did someone call the sheriff's department? Hello, hello.

Department? Hello, hello.

Department? Hello, hello. Anybody here dial 911?

Anybody here dial 911?

Anybody here dial 911? Sir, are you the booze

Sir, are you the booze

Sir, are you the booze hammer of galen?

Hammer of galen?

Hammer of galen? >> I am booze hammer of galen.

>> I am booze hammer of galen.

>> I am booze hammer of galen. >> what is the nature of

>> what is the nature of

>> what is the nature of your emergency, sir?

Your emergency, sir?

Your emergency, sir? >> well, there's a massive

>> well, there's a massive

>> well, there's a massive anachronism going on down--

Anachronism going on down--

Anachronism going on down-- >> there's a what?

>> there's a what?

>> there's a what? >> there's a gentleman using a

>> there's a gentleman using a

>> there's a gentleman using a cold iron sparta, which is a

Cold iron sparta, which is a

Cold iron sparta, which is a circa 1195. I believe the cutoff

Circa 1195. I believe the cutoff

Circa 1195. I believe the cutoff year here is 1095.

Year here is 1095.

Year here is 1095. >> and you called the

>> and you called the

>> and you called the sheriff's department because of

Sheriff's department because of

Sheriff's department because of this?

This?

This? >> well, yes. It's upsetting

>> well, yes. It's upsetting

>> well, yes. It's upsetting people. It's upsetting my mount

People. It's upsetting my mount

People. It's upsetting my mount viggo, and I don't want to--

Viggo, and I don't want to--

Viggo, and I don't want to-- >> out of date of your

>> out of date of your

>> out of date of your little make-me-up play.

Little make-me-up play.

Little make-me-up play. How'd you call us?

How'd you call us?

How'd you call us? >> I used a scrawing device.

>> I used a scrawing device.

>> I used a scrawing device. Um...

Um...

Um... >> what is a scrawing

>> what is a scrawing

>> what is a scrawing device, sir?

Device, sir?

Device, sir? >> [softly moaning] sorry.

>> [softly moaning] sorry.

>> [softly moaning] sorry. Uhh...Uhh...

Uhh...Uhh...

Uhh...Uhh... >> are you ok?

>> are you ok?

>> are you ok? >> my scrawing device is on

>> my scrawing device is on

>> my scrawing device is on vibrate. I must've been

Vibrate. I must've been

Vibrate. I must've been getting--

Getting--

Getting-- >> he's using a cell phone!

>> he's using a cell phone!

>> he's using a cell phone! You used a cellular telephone.

You used a cellular telephone.

You used a cellular telephone. >> I--I refer to it as a

>> I--I refer to it as a

>> I--I refer to it as a scrawing device...That I use

Scrawing device...That I use

Scrawing device...That I use to--

To--

To-- >> why? Why?

>> why? Why?

>> why? Why? >> because we are in the year

>> because we are in the year

>> because we are in the year 1095.

1095.

1095. >> now you're pissin' me

>> now you're pissin' me

>> now you're pissin' me off, tubby!

Off, tubby!

Off, tubby! >> I--no. This is--

>> I--no. This is--

>> I--no. This is-- >> ok, I got a question.

>> ok, I got a question.

>> ok, I got a question. >> this is my winter fat that

>> this is my winter fat that

>> this is my winter fat that I have not--I have not had

I have not--I have not had

I have not--I have not had enough jousting to work off my

Enough jousting to work off my

Enough jousting to work off my winter fat.

Winter fat.

Winter fat. >> it's August.

>> it's August.

>> it's August. >> the cotton candy ain't

>> the cotton candy ain't

>> the cotton candy ain't helpin', either, bro.

Helpin', either, bro.

Helpin', either, bro. >> this is--this is spun

>> this is--this is spun

>> this is--this is spun sugar. They had this in 1095.

Sugar. They had this in 1095.

Sugar. They had this in 1095. Viggo? You know what? Viggo and

Viggo? You know what? Viggo and

Viggo? You know what? Viggo and I are leaving.

I are leaving.

I are leaving. >> no, you're not. You're

>> no, you're not. You're

>> no, you're not. You're coming with us now.

Coming with us now.

Coming with us now. >> viggo, let's go.

>> viggo, let's go.

>> viggo, let's go. >> get him stabled in. Get

>> get him stabled in. Get

>> get him stabled in. Get him stabled in.

Him stabled in.

Him stabled in. >> no. Let's get some

>> no. Let's get some

>> no. Let's get some pretzeled bread.

Pretzeled bread.

Pretzeled bread. >> would you just fucking

>> would you just fucking

>> would you just fucking say pretzel?! It's not

Say pretzel?! It's not

Say pretzel?! It's not "pretzeled bread."

"pretzeled bread."

"pretzeled bread." >> it's not "pretzeled

>> it's not "pretzeled

>> it's not "pretzeled bread." it's a fucking pretzel.

Bread." it's a fucking pretzel.

Bread." it's a fucking pretzel. >> you're gonna get an angry

>> you're gonna get an angry

>> you're gonna get an angry couplet. Are you ready?

Couplet. Are you ready?

Couplet. Are you ready? >> go. Fire away.

>> go. Fire away.

>> go. Fire away. >> in mirrored pools which

>> in mirrored pools which

>> in mirrored pools which cover your eyes, and frightening

Cover your eyes, and frightening

Cover your eyes, and frightening is the fur on your skinny

Is the fur on your skinny

Is the fur on your skinny thighs. I think I've put--

Thighs. I think I've put--

Thighs. I think I've put-- >> get down! Get down off

>> get down! Get down off

>> get down! Get down off that burro!

That burro!

That burro! >> viggo. Viggo. Viggo! Mom!

>> viggo. Viggo. Viggo! Mom!

>> viggo. Viggo. Viggo! Mom! >> get off the donkey.

>> get off the donkey.

>> get off the donkey. >> mom! Listen...

>> mom! Listen...

>> mom! Listen... >> your mom can't help you

>> your mom can't help you

>> your mom can't help you now.

Now.

Now. >> I'm being taken to the

>> I'm being taken to the

>> I'm being taken to the future. But I will return

Future. But I will return

Future. But I will return with--I'll return with medicine!

With--I'll return with medicine!

With--I'll return with medicine! >> no, he won't.

>> no, he won't.

>> no, he won't. >> I will bring medicine!

>> I will bring medicine!

>> I will bring medicine! >> he'll return in a delorean

>> he'll return in a delorean

>> he'll return in a delorean with doc brown. How 'bout that?

With doc brown. How 'bout that?

With doc brown. How 'bout that? >> oh, that's really funny.

>> oh, that's really funny.

>> oh, that's really funny. You should be in the jester

You should be in the jester

You should be in the jester booth.

[kids all shouting]

[kids all shouting]

[kids all shouting] >> thank you, everybody.

>> thank you, everybody.

>> thank you, everybody. My name is deputy kimball, and

My name is deputy kimball, and

My name is deputy kimball, and I--all right, everybody settle

I--all right, everybody settle

I--all right, everybody settle down now. Hey!

Down now. Hey!

Down now. Hey! >> on the count of 3, I want

>> on the count of 3, I want

>> on the count of 3, I want quiet.

Quiet.

Quiet. >> 1...2...3.

>> 1...2...3.

>> 1...2...3. [kids still making noise]

[kids still making noise]

[kids still making noise] >> everybody just settle

>> everybody just settle

>> everybody just settle down. Now, I'm--I'm serious.

Down. Now, I'm--I'm serious.

Down. Now, I'm--I'm serious. Now, if y'all don't--if y'all

Now, if y'all don't--if y'all

Now, if y'all don't--if y'all don't want detention, if you

Don't want detention, if you

Don't want detention, if you know what's good--now, you,

Know what's good--now, you,

Know what's good--now, you, especially. I want you to be

Especially. I want you to be

Especially. I want you to be quiet right now! Now, stop it!

Quiet right now! Now, stop it!

Quiet right now! Now, stop it! Everybody shut up!

Everybody shut up!

Everybody shut up! [kids go silent]

[kids go silent]

[kids go silent] well, all right.

Well, all right.

Well, all right. [pleasantly] my name is deputy

[pleasantly] my name is deputy

[pleasantly] my name is deputy kimball. It's very good to meet

Kimball. It's very good to meet

Kimball. It's very good to meet you all. How are you all doin'

You all. How are you all doin'

You all. How are you all doin' today?

Today?

Today? [siren]

>> jeez, debbie, our

>> jeez, debbie, our

>> jeez, debbie, our relationship is really becoming

Relationship is really becoming

Relationship is really becoming good. I think it's time for us

Good. I think it's time for us

Good. I think it's time for us to move on to sex and

To move on to sex and

To move on to sex and intercourse.

Intercourse.

Intercourse. >> I agree, which makes it

>> I agree, which makes it

>> I agree, which makes it consensual, so there's no

Consensual, so there's no

Consensual, so there's no problem, although you do look a

Problem, although you do look a

Problem, although you do look a little young to me.

Little young to me.

Little young to me. [siren]

[siren]

[siren] >> freeze! Never have sex with

>> freeze! Never have sex with

>> freeze! Never have sex with anyone until you see a

Anyone until you see a

Anyone until you see a government issued I.D. With

Government issued I.D. With

Government issued I.D. With their birth date on it. Anyone

Their birth date on it. Anyone

Their birth date on it. Anyone you're having sex with should be

You're having sex with should be

You're having sex with should be born before today's date in...

Born before today's date in...

Born before today's date in... >> 1990.

>> 1990.

>> 1990. >> do the math.

>> do the math.

>> do the math. Or get yourself some sheriff's

Or get yourself some sheriff's

Or get yourself some sheriff's department bling-bling.

[horn honking]

[horn honking]

[horn honking] >> uh-oh...Uh-oh...

>> uh-oh...Uh-oh...

>> uh-oh...Uh-oh... >> wait! Stop!!

>> wait! Stop!!

>> wait! Stop!! >> nice! Nice one, ma'am.

>> nice! Nice one, ma'am.

>> nice! Nice one, ma'am. Do you wanna step out of the

Do you wanna step out of the

Do you wanna step out of the car? Can I see your license?

Car? Can I see your license?

Car? Can I see your license? >> I don't drink.

>> I don't drink.

>> I don't drink. >> none of these people drink

>> none of these people drink

>> none of these people drink either, and yet--

Either, and yet--

Either, and yet-- >> I don't drink alcohol!

>> I don't drink alcohol!

>> I don't drink alcohol! I don't even drink, ok? I'm just

I don't even drink, ok? I'm just

I don't even drink, ok? I'm just out of the program, and I do not

Out of the program, and I do not

Out of the program, and I do not drink. Ok...This way.

Drink. Ok...This way.

Drink. Ok...This way. >> arms out.

>> arms out.

>> arms out. >> you have a little bit of a

>> you have a little bit of a

>> you have a little bit of a camel toe, miss.

Camel toe, miss.

Camel toe, miss. >> I know! But I don't make

>> I know! But I don't make

>> I know! But I don't make these uniforms! You're a little

These uniforms! You're a little

These uniforms! You're a little belligerent, ma'am.

Belligerent, ma'am.

Belligerent, ma'am. >> I'm not belligerent! I'm

>> I'm not belligerent! I'm

>> I'm not belligerent! I'm angry. I feel victimized! By

Angry. I feel victimized! By

Angry. I feel victimized! By you, blondie!

You, blondie!

You, blondie! >> you smell like a winery.

>> you smell like a winery.

>> you smell like a winery. >> that's because I had a cold

>> that's because I had a cold

>> that's because I had a cold and I took something for it.

And I took something for it.

And I took something for it. >> you took some wine?

>> you took some wine?

>> you took some wine? >> no, a took a cough syrup

>> no, a took a cough syrup

>> no, a took a cough syrup tank.

Tank.

Tank. >> ma'am, you can get your purse

>> ma'am, you can get your purse

>> ma'am, you can get your purse and go in there with the other

And go in there with the other

And go in there with the other drunks.

Drunks.

Drunks. >> susan?

>> susan?

>> susan? >> I'm not drunk, I said!

>> I'm not drunk, I said!

>> I'm not drunk, I said! >> get your purse and go over

>> get your purse and go over

>> get your purse and go over here. Seize the vehicle.

Here. Seize the vehicle.

Here. Seize the vehicle. >> no!

>> no!

>> no! >> yes!

>> yes!

>> yes! >> no! [pounds on hood]

>> no! [pounds on hood]

>> no! [pounds on hood] >> get her off, get her off, get

>> get her off, get her off, get

>> get her off, get her off, get her off, get her off!

Her off, get her off!

Her off, get her off! >> gimme my car, you little--

>> gimme my car, you little--

>> gimme my car, you little-- >> get her off, get her off!

>> get her off, get her off!

>> get her off, get her off! >> do you want me to taze you?

>> do you want me to taze you?

>> do you want me to taze you? >> we are getting a paddy wagon.

>> we are getting a paddy wagon.

>> we are getting a paddy wagon. You are all going to go in the

You are all going to go in the

You are all going to go in the paddy wagon. Jeez! No lights.

Paddy wagon. Jeez! No lights.

Paddy wagon. Jeez! No lights. >> cowboy. Cowboy, over here.

>> cowboy. Cowboy, over here.

>> cowboy. Cowboy, over here. >> hey, hey, hey, hey! Get off!

>> hey, hey, hey, hey! Get off!

>> hey, hey, hey, hey! Get off! >> sir--

>> sir--

>> sir-- >> get him!

>> get him!

>> get him! >> I got her. You can't--

>> I got her. You can't--

>> I got her. You can't-- hey! Hey! Get out--

Hey! Hey! Get out--

Hey! Hey! Get out-- she went--she's got--sir!

She went--she's got--sir!

She went--she's got--sir! Son of a...All right, you hold

Son of a...All right, you hold

Son of a...All right, you hold her.

Her.

Her. Get the big black guy!

Get the big black guy!

Get the big black guy! >> cuff this one!

>> cuff this one!

>> cuff this one! >> no! No!

>> no! No!

>> no! No! >> pinky!

>> pinky!

>> pinky! >> I got her, I got her, I got

>> I got her, I got her, I got

>> I got her, I got her, I got her!

>> I saw anita franco...Last

>> I saw anita franco...Last

>> I saw anita franco...Last year. In madrid, Spain. She was

Year. In madrid, Spain. She was

Year. In madrid, Spain. She was wonderful! Do you know anita

Wonderful! Do you know anita

Wonderful! Do you know anita franco?

Franco?

Franco? >> I've heard, uh...Heard a

>> I've heard, uh...Heard a

>> I've heard, uh...Heard a couple of her tunes.

Couple of her tunes.

Couple of her tunes. >> you have, have you? I...I

>> you have, have you? I...I

>> you have, have you? I...I thought as much.

Thought as much.

Thought as much. >> she's a very talented

>> she's a very talented

>> she's a very talented entertainer.

Entertainer.

Entertainer. >> yes, she is. She's her own

>> yes, she is. She's her own

>> yes, she is. She's her own person and...God bless her for

Person and...God bless her for

Person and...God bless her for it, you know? Frigging men!

It, you know? Frigging men!

It, you know? Frigging men! God damn stupid men!

God damn stupid men!

God damn stupid men! Ohh! I hate men.

Ohh! I hate men.

Ohh! I hate men. I'm here because I'm a man,

I'm here because I'm a man,

I'm here because I'm a man, because of men and their laws!

Because of men and their laws!

Because of men and their laws! I cannot be free!

I cannot be free!

I cannot be free! >> I know what you're trying to

>> I know what you're trying to

>> I know what you're trying to do...Spanish mike.

Do...Spanish mike.

Do...Spanish mike. They told me what you did and

They told me what you did and

They told me what you did and they told me how you charmed and

They told me how you charmed and

They told me how you charmed and they told me how you flirt and

They told me how you flirt and

They told me how you flirt and they told me how you s-sink

They told me how you s-sink

They told me how you s-sink into people's brains.

Into people's brains.

Into people's brains. >> if ??? Wear cutoffs

>> if ??? Wear cutoffs

>> if ??? Wear cutoffs and my aunts had tits my

And my aunts had tits my

And my aunts had tits my uncle would be my...Whatever.

Uncle would be my...Whatever.

Uncle would be my...Whatever. God, I hate jail! It sucks!

>> ok, we're gonna start with

>> ok, we're gonna start with

>> ok, we're gonna start with our feet together, and we're

Our feet together, and we're

Our feet together, and we're gonna take our right hand and

Gonna take our right hand and

Gonna take our right hand and we're gonna bring our right...

We're gonna bring our right...

We're gonna bring our right... Our right hand to our nose.

Our right hand to our nose.

Our right hand to our nose. We're gonna go...1, 2...

We're gonna go...1, 2...

We're gonna go...1, 2... 3, 4.

3, 4.

3, 4. Other hand. 5, 6...

Other hand. 5, 6...

Other hand. 5, 6... 7, 8.

7, 8.

7, 8. 5, 6, 7, 8,

5, 6, 7, 8,

5, 6, 7, 8, and 1, 2, 3, 4,

And 1, 2, 3, 4,

And 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8.

5, 6, 7, 8.

5, 6, 7, 8. Walk, 2, 3, 4,

Walk, 2, 3, 4,

Walk, 2, 3, 4, booty, booty, shimmy up,

Booty, booty, shimmy up,

Booty, booty, shimmy up, and hip, hip, hip, hip,

And hip, hip, hip, hip,

And hip, hip, hip, hip, roller, 6, 7, 8!

Roller, 6, 7, 8!

Roller, 6, 7, 8! >> whoo! Whoo!

>> whoo! Whoo!

>> whoo! Whoo! You've all passed your audition.

You've all passed your audition.

You've all passed your audition. And you're all goin' to jail!

>> ho! Calm down!

>> ho! Calm down!

>> ho! Calm down! >> hey, hey, hey! Hey, hey.

>> hey, hey, hey! Hey, hey.

>> hey, hey, hey! Hey, hey. >> whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

>> whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

>> whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! >> guys, guys, I need you for

>> guys, guys, I need you for

>> guys, guys, I need you for a second. Uh-uh, lady. Hands

A second. Uh-uh, lady. Hands

A second. Uh-uh, lady. Hands off. Have you guys ever been or

Off. Have you guys ever been or

Off. Have you guys ever been or done security for a ted nugent

Done security for a ted nugent

Done security for a ted nugent concert before?

Concert before?

Concert before? >> no. No, sir.

>> no. No, sir.

>> no. No, sir. >> all right, here's some rules.

>> all right, here's some rules.

>> all right, here's some rules. Don't ever look the nuge

Don't ever look the nuge

Don't ever look the nuge directly in the eye. Don't pull

Directly in the eye. Don't pull

Directly in the eye. Don't pull on the nuge's hair. Don't pull

On the nuge's hair. Don't pull

On the nuge's hair. Don't pull out a wrist rocket and shoot him

Out a wrist rocket and shoot him

Out a wrist rocket and shoot him in the face with a ball bearing

In the face with a ball bearing

In the face with a ball bearing like happened in 1978 in kansas

Like happened in 1978 in kansas

Like happened in 1978 in kansas city, all right? Don't do that!

City, all right? Don't do that!

City, all right? Don't do that! If he wants to talk about

If he wants to talk about

If he wants to talk about hunting, specifically bow

Hunting, specifically bow

Hunting, specifically bow hunting, get interested. Get

Hunting, get interested. Get

Hunting, get interested. Get real interested, ok?

Real interested, ok?

Real interested, ok? >> yeah, whatever.

>> yeah, whatever.

>> yeah, whatever. >> not whatever. I need an

>> not whatever. I need an

>> not whatever. I need an affirmative on this.

Affirmative on this.

Affirmative on this. >> we got it.

>> we got it.

>> we got it. >> you guys, don't be a dick

>> you guys, don't be a dick

>> you guys, don't be a dick back here. This is important.

Back here. This is important.

Back here. This is important. This could be a career move for

This could be a career move for

This could be a career move for you guys. Do you own any

You guys. Do you own any

You guys. Do you own any ted nugent albums?

Ted nugent albums?

Ted nugent albums? >> I do not have any fred nugent

>> I do not have any fred nugent

>> I do not have any fred nugent albums.

Albums.

Albums. >> it's ted nugent, sir.

>> it's ted nugent, sir.

>> it's ted nugent, sir. >> whatever. I don't have 'em.

>> whatever. I don't have 'em.

>> whatever. I don't have 'em. >> if the nuge, aka, ted nugent,

>> if the nuge, aka, ted nugent,

>> if the nuge, aka, ted nugent, asks you after this concert if

Asks you after this concert if

Asks you after this concert if you own some of his albums, what

You own some of his albums, what

You own some of his albums, what do you think you might say then?

Do you think you might say then?

Do you think you might say then? You might wanna say, "uh, yes,

You might wanna say, "uh, yes,

You might wanna say, "uh, yes, sir, I love your work, and I

Sir, I love your work, and I

Sir, I love your work, and I have several of your vinyl

Have several of your vinyl

Have several of your vinyl albums at home." hey, I like

Albums at home." hey, I like

Albums at home." hey, I like your hairstyle. You might be

Your hairstyle. You might be

Your hairstyle. You might be asked lay it down.

Asked lay it down.

Asked lay it down. >> I'm not laying down anything,

>> I'm not laying down anything,

>> I'm not laying down anything, sir. I'm doin' my job.

Sir. I'm doin' my job.

Sir. I'm doin' my job. >> maybe later on. All right,

>> maybe later on. All right,

>> maybe later on. All right, well, here he comes. All right,

Well, here he comes. All right,

Well, here he comes. All right, you two dumb asses, don't

You two dumb asses, don't

You two dumb asses, don't screw this up! This is big-time!

Screw this up! This is big-time!

Screw this up! This is big-time! Got it? This is the nuge!

Got it? This is the nuge!

Got it? This is the nuge! Here he comes. All right!

Here he comes. All right!

Here he comes. All right! [girls screaming]

[ted screaming]

[ted screaming]

[ted screaming] >> asshole.

>> asshole.

>> asshole. >> asshole.

>> mike?

>> mike?

>> mike? Mike al--

Mike al--

Mike al-- holy! Jeez!

Holy! Jeez!

Holy! Jeez! >> how are you?

>> how are you?

>> how are you? >> not 'supposed to talk to ya.

>> not 'supposed to talk to ya.

>> not 'supposed to talk to ya. >> everyone has spoken to me.

>> everyone has spoken to me.

>> everyone has spoken to me. You're not breaking any rules

You're not breaking any rules

You're not breaking any rules or anything, believe me. It's

Or anything, believe me. It's

Or anything, believe me. It's all very relaxed here. It's all

All very relaxed here. It's all

All very relaxed here. It's all very...At ease. [laughs]

Very...At ease. [laughs]

Very...At ease. [laughs] >> ok.

>> ok.

>> ok. >> what you guys got there,

>> what you guys got there,

>> what you guys got there, .9 millimeter?

.9 millimeter?

.9 millimeter? >> uh, yeah, we got a beretta.

>> uh, yeah, we got a beretta.

>> uh, yeah, we got a beretta. >> is that a beretta? How does

>> is that a beretta? How does

>> is that a beretta? How does that feel?

That feel?

That feel? >> it's a pretty light gun. Not

>> it's a pretty light gun. Not

>> it's a pretty light gun. Not much of a kick just because it's

Much of a kick just because it's

Much of a kick just because it's got automatic action, but...

Got automatic action, but...

Got automatic action, but... Pretty good firearm.

Pretty good firearm.

Pretty good firearm. Yeah, see?

Yeah, see?

Yeah, see? >> oh, that's nice.

>> oh, that's nice.

>> oh, that's nice. >> see how I filed it down a

>> see how I filed it down a

>> see how I filed it down a little bit?

Little bit?

Little bit? >> that would be too big for my

>> that would be too big for my

>> that would be too big for my hand.

Hand.

Hand. >> no. I don't think so.

>> no. I don't think so.

>> no. I don't think so. >> can I feel the weight of the

>> can I feel the weight of the

>> can I feel the weight of the thing?

Thing?

Thing? >> yeah, it's pretty good,

>> yeah, it's pretty good,

>> yeah, it's pretty good, right?

Right?

Right? >> yeah, but I can't--oh, this

>> yeah, but I can't--oh, this

>> yeah, but I can't--oh, this is open here. Just the weight.

Is open here. Just the weight.

Is open here. Just the weight. Now, you hold on to it--

Now, you hold on to it--

Now, you hold on to it-- >> no, I shouldn't do it. I

>> no, I shouldn't do it. I

>> no, I shouldn't do it. I mean, you're a prisoner and it's

Mean, you're a prisoner and it's

Mean, you're a prisoner and it's a gun and, you know, that--

A gun and, you know, that--

A gun and, you know, that-- >> put the safety on. Put the

>> put the safety on. Put the

>> put the safety on. Put the safety on. Make sure it's on.

Safety on. Make sure it's on.

Safety on. Make sure it's on. >> yeah, it's on. Don't take the

>> yeah, it's on. Don't take the

>> yeah, it's on. Don't take the safety off, though.

Safety off, though.

Safety off, though. >> just the weight. Just the

>> just the weight. Just the

>> just the weight. Just the weight.

Weight.

Weight. >> feel the balance. Balance it

>> feel the balance. Balance it

>> feel the balance. Balance it up on your finger there and you

Up on your finger there and you

Up on your finger there and you can feel it just like perfectly

Can feel it just like perfectly

Can feel it just like perfectly align. For a cheap gun, it's not

Align. For a cheap gun, it's not

Align. For a cheap gun, it's not bad.

Bad.

Bad. >> no, it's a good gun. Listen,

>> no, it's a good gun. Listen,

>> no, it's a good gun. Listen, I took the safety off. Nothing

I took the safety off. Nothing

I took the safety off. Nothing personal--open the door, please.

Personal--open the door, please.

Personal--open the door, please. >> took the bullets out!

>> took the bullets out!

>> took the bullets out! Now who's inside whose head?

Now who's inside whose head?

Now who's inside whose head? Gotcha! Gotcha!

Gotcha! Gotcha!

Gotcha! Gotcha! >> you took the bullets out?

>> you took the bullets out?

>> you took the bullets out? >> yeah, bullets are outside.

>> yeah, bullets are outside.

>> yeah, bullets are outside. >> you took the bullets out?

>> you took the bullets out?

>> you took the bullets out? >> yeah, there's no way I'd come

>> yeah, there's no way I'd come

>> yeah, there's no way I'd come in here with bullets. You think

In here with bullets. You think

In here with bullets. You think I'd be--

I'd be--

I'd be-- >> touche, my friend. Nicely

>> touche, my friend. Nicely

>> touche, my friend. Nicely played, my friend.

Played, my friend.

Played, my friend. >> gotcha. Gotcha.

>> gotcha. Gotcha.

>> gotcha. Gotcha. >> you got me. You son of a

>> you got me. You son of a

>> you got me. You son of a bitch! Son of a bitch!

>> you ain't gonna get in my

>> you ain't gonna get in my

>> you ain't gonna get in my head, all right? I'm just gonna

Head, all right? I'm just gonna

Head, all right? I'm just gonna tell you that straight up front.

Tell you that straight up front.

Tell you that straight up front. All right?

All right?

All right? >> I respect a strong black

>> I respect a strong black

>> I respect a strong black woman.

Woman.

Woman. >> yes, you do. Hey.

>> yes, you do. Hey.

>> yes, you do. Hey. >> can I tell you something?

>> can I tell you something?

>> can I tell you something? >> no, don't tell me nothin',

>> no, don't tell me nothin',

>> no, don't tell me nothin', 'cause I'm gonna tell you

'cause I'm gonna tell you

'cause I'm gonna tell you something. I'm gonna tell you

Something. I'm gonna tell you

Something. I'm gonna tell you that I am like them guards that

That I am like them guards that

That I am like them guards that stand outside the queen's

Stand outside the queen's

Stand outside the queen's house, the ones with the big hat

House, the ones with the big hat

House, the ones with the big hat on? People be sayin' stuff, and

On? People be sayin' stuff, and

On? People be sayin' stuff, and they just--boom!

They just--boom!

They just--boom! >> I knew that about you. I

>> I knew that about you. I

>> I knew that about you. I always knew that about you,

Always knew that about you,

Always knew that about you, williams. I always knew that

Williams. I always knew that

Williams. I always knew that about you.

About you.

About you. >> all right. All right.

>> all right. All right.

>> all right. All right. >> what I was going to tell you

>> what I was going to tell you

>> what I was going to tell you was on my mother's side, my

Was on my mother's side, my

Was on my mother's side, my grandmother's grandmother is

Grandmother's grandmother is

Grandmother's grandmother is from ghana, africa. So I'm--

From ghana, africa. So I'm--

From ghana, africa. So I'm-- >> so you know I ain't playin'

>> so you know I ain't playin'

>> so you know I ain't playin' around.

Around.

Around. >> I had a complete--I had a

>> I had a complete--I had a

>> I had a complete--I had a total scholarship for

Total scholarship for

Total scholarship for morehouse college when I was

Morehouse college when I was

Morehouse college when I was 21, but the man held me down!

21, but the man held me down!

21, but the man held me down! Come on.

Come on.

Come on. [williams laughing]

[williams laughing]

[williams laughing] right?!

Right?!

Right?! >> I'm just sayin'...When you do

>> I'm just sayin'...When you do

>> I'm just sayin'...When you do what you do the way you do it,

What you do the way you do it,

What you do the way you do it, you get respect.

You get respect.

You get respect. >> preach, my nubian princess,

>> preach, my nubian princess,

>> preach, my nubian princess, preach! Oh!

Preach! Oh!

Preach! Oh! >> that's what I'm talkin'

>> that's what I'm talkin'

>> that's what I'm talkin' about! Ha ha ha!

About! Ha ha ha!

About! Ha ha ha! Gimme a pound on it! Gimme a

Gimme a pound on it! Gimme a

Gimme a pound on it! Gimme a pound on it! You're so crazy!

Pound on it! You're so crazy!

Pound on it! You're so crazy! >> hee hee hee hee hee...

>> hee hee hee hee hee...

>> hee hee hee hee hee... >> ok. Can you let my hand go?

>> ok. Can you let my hand go?

>> ok. Can you let my hand go? Please?

Please?

Please? B-brother? Ha!

B-brother? Ha!

B-brother? Ha! You're hurting my wrist.

You're hurting my wrist.

You're hurting my wrist. >> there are many levels of

>> there are many levels of

>> there are many levels of pain. You have just crossed into

Pain. You have just crossed into

Pain. You have just crossed into the welcome mat. You have not

The welcome mat. You have not

The welcome mat. You have not even entered the door, walked

Even entered the door, walked

Even entered the door, walked down the hallway, and gone up

Down the hallway, and gone up

Down the hallway, and gone up the stairs to visit the vip

The stairs to visit the vip

The stairs to visit the vip rooms.

Rooms.

Rooms. >> come on! For real! I'm--

>> come on! For real! I'm--

>> come on! For real! I'm-- >> this is foolish.

>> this is foolish.

>> this is foolish. >> hey!

>> hey!

>> hey! >> oh, now you--tch! If you're

>> oh, now you--tch! If you're

>> oh, now you--tch! If you're going to yell...

>> sheriff's department!

>> sheriff's department!

>> sheriff's department! >> hey, terry.

>> hey, terry.

>> hey, terry. >> hi!

>> hi!

>> hi! >> how's it goin' tonight?

>> how's it goin' tonight?

>> how's it goin' tonight? >> hi.

>> hi.

>> hi. >> madames, excuse me. Take a

>> madames, excuse me. Take a

>> madames, excuse me. Take a walk.

Walk.

Walk. >> bye, you guys. I'll see you

>> bye, you guys. I'll see you

>> bye, you guys. I'll see you at the party. What's going on?

At the party. What's going on?

At the party. What's going on? >> what's going on is that

>> what's going on is that

>> what's going on is that apparently you've been doing...

Apparently you've been doing...

Apparently you've been doing... People's taxes.

People's taxes.

People's taxes. >> "terry bernardino, certified

>> "terry bernardino, certified

>> "terry bernardino, certified public accountant"?

Public accountant"?

Public accountant"? >> that's me. At your service.

>> that's me. At your service.

>> that's me. At your service. Why? Do you want me to do your

Why? Do you want me to do your

Why? Do you want me to do your taxes?

Taxes?

Taxes? >> when did you get your cpa?

>> when did you get your cpa?

>> when did you get your cpa? >> what's that?

>> what's that?

>> what's that? >> oh, my god, what is that?

>> oh, my god, what is that?

>> oh, my god, what is that? >> oh, is that the thing where

>> oh, is that the thing where

>> oh, is that the thing where somebody can't breathe and you

Somebody can't breathe and you

Somebody can't breathe and you give 'em cpa? Whatever. I'll

Give 'em cpa? Whatever. I'll

Give 'em cpa? Whatever. I'll stop. I'll just go back to being

Stop. I'll just go back to being

Stop. I'll just go back to being a doctor.

A doctor.

A doctor. >> how did you even start doing

>> how did you even start doing

>> how did you even start doing people's taxes, terry?

People's taxes, terry?

People's taxes, terry? >> um...Some guy who was not my

>> um...Some guy who was not my

>> um...Some guy who was not my boyfriend for a while...

Boyfriend for a while...

Boyfriend for a while... Said he wanted me to look at his

Said he wanted me to look at his

Said he wanted me to look at his taxes, and I was like...Maybe I

Taxes, and I was like...Maybe I

Taxes, and I was like...Maybe I will, maybe I won't. And he

Will, maybe I won't. And he

Will, maybe I won't. And he punched me in the face. So I was

Punched me in the face. So I was

Punched me in the face. So I was like, "all right--"

Like, "all right--"

Like, "all right--" >> so you're the victim. This is

>> so you're the victim. This is

>> so you're the victim. This is a terry story--

A terry story--

A terry story-- >> oh, god, there he goes again.

>> oh, god, there he goes again.

>> oh, god, there he goes again. >> trudy, it's amazing. In this

>> trudy, it's amazing. In this

>> trudy, it's amazing. In this part of terry's life, terry's

Part of terry's life, terry's

Part of terry's life, terry's the victim.

The victim.

The victim. >> yeah.

>> yeah.

>> yeah. >> as opposed to...As opposed to

>> as opposed to...As opposed to

>> as opposed to...As opposed to every other time. This time,

Every other time. This time,

Every other time. This time, you're the victim.

You're the victim.

You're the victim. >> as I recall, the last time

>> as I recall, the last time

>> as I recall, the last time terry was a victim was when he

Terry was a victim was when he

Terry was a victim was when he was giving pap smears in the

Was giving pap smears in the

Was giving pap smears in the back of his van.

Back of his van.

Back of his van. >> yeah, remember that?

>> yeah, remember that?

>> yeah, remember that? >> so he was a victim 'cause the

>> so he was a victim 'cause the

>> so he was a victim 'cause the lady clamped down on him.

Lady clamped down on him.

Lady clamped down on him. >> [sobbing] yeah!

>> [sobbing] yeah!

>> [sobbing] yeah! She...Kicked me in the face...

She...Kicked me in the face...

She...Kicked me in the face... >> come on, terry.

>> come on, terry.

>> come on, terry. >> stop. That's a curb there. I

>> stop. That's a curb there. I

>> stop. That's a curb there. I can't go over it.

Can't go over it.

Can't go over it. >> you can't go over it.

>> you can't go over it.

>> you can't go over it. >> no. I'll fall and hurt

>> no. I'll fall and hurt

>> no. I'll fall and hurt myself.

Myself.

Myself. >> terry, I like you. I used to

>> terry, I like you. I used to

>> terry, I like you. I used to like you.

Like you.

Like you. >> thank you! What?

>> I was in there...You know, I

>> I was in there...You know, I

>> I was in there...You know, I had to take my shift guarding

Had to take my shift guarding

Had to take my shift guarding him, and I could not help

Him, and I could not help

Him, and I could not help feeling like..."I wanna take

Feeling like..."I wanna take

Feeling like..."I wanna take off my panties." I could not

Off my panties." I could not

Off my panties." I could not shake the feeling of that, and

Shake the feeling of that, and

Shake the feeling of that, and then when my shift was over, I

Then when my shift was over, I

Then when my shift was over, I had to go pee...My panties were

Had to go pee...My panties were

Had to go pee...My panties were gone. Huh?

Gone. Huh?

Gone. Huh? >> like lost time, like ufos.

>> like lost time, like ufos.

>> like lost time, like ufos. Did you lose time? Did you check

Did you lose time? Did you check

Did you lose time? Did you check your watch?

Your watch?

Your watch? >> I don't know!

>> I don't know!

>> I don't know! Now, unless...Unless I just left

Now, unless...Unless I just left

Now, unless...Unless I just left and forgot to put something on.

And forgot to put something on.

And forgot to put something on. But I am 99% sure that I did.

>> you--you--oh...No.

>> you--you--oh...No.

>> you--you--oh...No. No. No!

No. No!

No. No! >> let's go. Come on.

>> let's go. Come on.

>> let's go. Come on. >> I don't want to go!

>> I don't want to go!

>> I don't want to go! >> let's go.

>> let's go.

>> let's go. >> you can't make me! You can't

>> you can't make me! You can't

>> you can't make me! You can't make me! Oh! Aah! No! [coughs]

Make me! Oh! Aah! No! [coughs]

Make me! Oh! Aah! No! [coughs] >> got a little paperwork for

>> got a little paperwork for

>> got a little paperwork for you.

You.

You. >> he's all yours.

>> he's all yours.

>> he's all yours. >> sign the release form right

>> sign the release form right

>> sign the release form right there.

There.

There. >> reno sheriff's department.

>> reno sheriff's department.

>> reno sheriff's department. >> thanks. I wouldn't be

>> thanks. I wouldn't be

>> thanks. I wouldn't be surprised if your department

Surprised if your department

Surprised if your department gets a commendation.

Gets a commendation.

Gets a commendation. [wheels screech]

[wheels screech]

[wheels screech] [whooping and cheering]

>> ...The score at--

>> ...The score at--

>> ...The score at-- >> one-nothing.

>> one-nothing.

>> one-nothing. >> one-nothing. Hey, asshole,

>> one-nothing. Hey, asshole,

>> one-nothing. Hey, asshole, no parking here.

No parking here.

No parking here. >> uh, yeah, that's the

>> uh, yeah, that's the

>> uh, yeah, that's the sheriff's department only.

Sheriff's department only.

Sheriff's department only. >> I'm sorry. This isn't the

>> I'm sorry. This isn't the

>> I'm sorry. This isn't the area for prisoner pickup?

Area for prisoner pickup?

Area for prisoner pickup? >> it happens to be, yes.

>> it happens to be, yes.

>> it happens to be, yes. >> dynamite. I'm agent bruce

>> dynamite. I'm agent bruce

>> dynamite. I'm agent bruce padule for a 469 pickup of a.K.

Padule for a 469 pickup of a.K.

Padule for a 469 pickup of a.K. Alverez.

Alverez.

Alverez. >> you're who for what?

>> you're who for what?

>> you're who for what? >> agent bruce padule--I'm sorry

>> agent bruce padule--I'm sorry

>> agent bruce padule--I'm sorry about that. 469 pickup.

About that. 469 pickup.

About that. 469 pickup. >> oh, you're with the fbi.

>> oh, you're with the fbi.

>> oh, you're with the fbi. >> here's my license.

>> here's my license.

>> here's my license. >> and you're here to...

>> and you're here to...

>> and you're here to... >> alverez. You need another

>> alverez. You need another

>> alverez. You need another form, that's a credit card with

Form, that's a credit card with

Form, that's a credit card with a picture on it.

A picture on it.

A picture on it. >> pick-up...

>> pick-up...

>> pick-up... >> we're from the fbi. We're

>> we're from the fbi. We're

>> we're from the fbi. We're here to pick up alverez.

Here to pick up alverez.

Here to pick up alverez. >> yeah, I--yeah. Um...

>> yeah, I--yeah. Um...

>> yeah, I--yeah. Um... The other...Fellows.

The other...Fellows.

The other...Fellows. I'll give you that...

I'll give you that...

I'll give you that... >> absolutely.

>> absolutely.

>> absolutely. >> and then...

>> and then...

>> and then... >> is there a problem?

>> is there a problem?

>> is there a problem? >> no, sirree...

>> no, sirree...

>> no, sirree... Here's the thing...

Here's the thing...

Here's the thing... >> yeah.

>> yeah.

>> yeah. >> he's being deloused.

>> he's being deloused.

>> he's being deloused. [captioning made possible by

[captioning made possible by

[captioning made possible by mtv networks]

Mtv networks]

Mtv networks] [captioned by the national

[captioned by the national

[captioned by the national captioning institute

Captioning institute

Captioning institute --www.Ncicap.Org]

--Www.Ncicap.Org]

--Www.Ncicap.Org] >> think of this as, um...

>> think of this as, um...

>> think of this as, um... >> we don't come down to imagine

>> we don't come down to imagine

>> we don't come down to imagine things. We can't come to a crime

Things. We can't come to a crime

Things. We can't come to a crime scene--

Scene--

Scene-- >> it's a raping of

>> it's a raping of

>> it's a raping of verisimilitude. It's a

Verisimilitude. It's a

Verisimilitude. It's a verisimilitude rape.

Verisimilitude rape.

Verisimilitude rape. >> oh, here's our fucking

>> oh, here's our fucking

>> oh, here's our fucking thesaurus.

Thesaurus.

Thesaurus. >> all right. What are we

>> all right. What are we

>> all right. What are we lookin' up? Anachronism first.

Lookin' up? Anachronism first.

Lookin' up? Anachronism first. >> anachronism. Ver--vermily

>> anachronism. Ver--vermily

>> anachronism. Ver--vermily you said?

You said?

You said? >> was that a band that was like

>> was that a band that was like

>> was that a band that was like rush?

Rush?

Rush? >> did you have a druid say an

>> did you have a druid say an

>> did you have a druid say an invisibility chant on that,

Invisibility chant on that,

Invisibility chant on that, because I would like to see...

Because I would like to see...

Because I would like to see... >> oh! Oh, now you're pissin' me

>> oh! Oh, now you're pissin' me

>> oh! Oh, now you're pissin' me off! Now you're pissin' me off,

Off! Now you're pissin' me off,

Off! Now you're pissin' me off, tubby!

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