All language subtitles for Reno 911 s02e15 Department Investigation (Part 1).eng

I warn you.

What you are about to see
is shocking.

( grunting )

Stop !

( honking truck horn )

Oh, my god.
Oh, my god.

Oh, no !

Why ?!
Why ?!

This is maria storm,

Reporting from the reno
sheriff's department,

Where an unfolding scandal

Has rocked this
city to its core.

Somebody's got to
take out the trash.

And I promise
the citizens of reno

That that person is gonna
be me, mike powers.

Thank you.

I'm maria storm,
channel 10 news at 10:00.

Oh, yeah.

I have some questions
to ask you about the ongoing

Investigation against
your department.

Oh, I have no comment
on that.

Lieutenant, I have
some questions to ask you.

Lieutenant dangle !

Lieutenant dangle, the people
have a right to know !

What about the charges ?!

That's a fire lane,
you can't stand there.

You can't stand there,
it's a fire lane.

Whoo !
Come here !

( tires screeching )

Oh... Ah !

Whoa !

( growling )

( sirens blaring )

( siren wailing )

I feel like this
department is standing

On a vast precipice,

And the very first droplet
of shit is coming down

In the shit storm
that's gonna bury us all.

Uh, I hate to say
I agree with junior.

I think the department is
on its last shaky legs.

It's like a
long game of twister

That's coming to an end,

And the d.A.'s about to
spin "left foot green."

Nobody's gonna
be able to reach it.

It's all just gonna
come tumbling down

Like a house of cards.

Some horrible game of
twister where it's all boys,

And they kill you
when you lose.

All I gotta say

Is when I go before
the review board--

Huh, huh ?

I'm going to
be what ?

100% professional.

State your name,
please.

Officer raneisha williams.

And I didn't
do nothing.

Officer williams,
would you mind

Removing your hat, please ?

I keep a kleenex
under there

Because it
sticks to my forehead.

The kleenex is
fine, ma'am.

We just would prefer
that you remove your hat.

This is an official
investigation.

Thank you.

Can I just say
my side of it ?

Please.

Okay, only thing
I know about

Is people being
racist on the force, okay ?

When you ride in the car
with them,

They make the black
officers sit in the back.

Why ?

Because they say,
"oh, your people,

That's where your people
used to being in the back."

And, and, and, and,

They throw out
the "n" word.

They use it all the time.

Uh, say, can you tell me

Exactly who has been
using this word ?

I got my fingers
ready, okay ?

Watch, watch,
watch, watch...

Dangle.

Huh, huh ?

Junior, wiegel,
even garcia.

All of 'em.

And you know who I'm
surprised at the most ?

I'm surprised at dangle.

I mean, he a fag, and
he calling everybody a nigger.

Well, this morning,
we're serving a summons.

Pretty simple stuff,
really.

Just got to put it in his hand
and say, "you've been served."

Piece of cake.

I got to go to
work, fellas.

This won't take
a second.

How you doing ?
Hi.

You ian meltzer ?

Uh, yes, I am.

Hi, you've been served.

No, I'm not ian meltzer,
I'm not ian meltzer.

"meltzer."
"meltzer."

M-e-l--

Sir, you have to take this
from me to be served, okay ?

You just found a
typo on my I.D.

Actually, I don't,
if it's not for me. ( cellphone ringing )

Ian meltzer's phone.

He just said
"ian meltzer's phone."

Yes, yes, I'm here.

Tell gina she can get
her own ship--

Sir... Sir.

I'm kind of
indisposed right--

Yeah, there's some ridiculous
men trying to serve me--

Sir.

Okay, tell gina--

Hang up the phone, sir,
hang up the phone, sir.

Could you not talk while
I'm on the phone, please ?

Please ?

No, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no !

Did he get hurt ?

I'm going.

We're going now.

Oh, we're
going now.

Now we go.

Oh, no, no, no.

Easy.

...Talk to
a lawyer, sir.

I got this way blocked.

Kind of hard to put something
in a fist, isn't it ?

Kind of illegal
to shove a summons

In a fisted hand,
isn't it ?

I don't think it is.

It is illegal.
I don't think it is, sir.

You fight like
a proud toro, okay ?

Thank you.

That's why we're gonna
tear it up, okay ?

I'm the emperor nero,
and I'm saying...

Thumbs up, buddy.

"...Let 'em, let this one
fight another day, okay ?"

You guys are
absolutely cool.

Please come by--

No, no, no, no !
Oh, oh, oh, oh !

No eyewitness,
no eyewitness !

Joe-- eyewitness.
In your face.

It's always easier serving
the brothers, you know ?

Yeah, brothers just,
you know...

Brothers just take it.

Goddamn honkies.

What's up ?

Shh, shh, shh, shh.

Weasel in the wall.

( rustling )

( squeaking )

( pattering )

( scratching )

( pattering )

( squeaking )

( pattering )

( squeaking )

Now, when I sit down
in front of that d.A.,

I'm just gonna do my best

To look sophisticated
and intelligent,

Keep my mouth shut,

And hopefully
not piss myself.

That's good.

You manage to do that
in morning briefings.

( powers )
I want you to take a look at this photograph here

And tell me what
you know about it.

Bailiff, if you
could take this

Up to officer junior.

Officer, could you remove
your glasses, please ?

Officer,
can you s--

Can you see that ?

Can you tell me
what's on that picture ?

That's one of the boys
in the department, sir.

No, that's actually
a picture of a van.

Officer junior,
can you look up here ?

Can you look up here
for a second ?

Yes, sir.

Can you see me ?

How many fingers
am I holding up ?

Five.

Five fingers ?

Both hands
or one hand, sir ?

No, just one ha--
it's just one hand.

Are those prescription
glasses ?

No, sir,
don't need 'em.

Do you operate
a cruiser ?

I know these streets like
the back of my hand, sir.

The back of your hand ?

Yes, sir.

I guess you'd have to.

Do you operate
a firearm ?

I'm the best shot
in the department, sir.

( pattering )

Shh, shh, shh...

Shh, shh.

( squeaking )

( pattering )

( cocking gun )

( cocking gun )

Oh, god, oh, god.

Travis, travis ?

You all right,
travis ?

Did you get the weasel ?

No, we lost him.

I think you should
take the 5th with the d.A.

You know what
the 5th is ?

You mean tell 'em
that I did it ?

No, that's not the 5th.

The 5th is your right
to not say anything at all.

Can you do that for me ?

Why do you-- why ?

Because you know the little
bird in your mouth

Who says terrible
things sometimes.

Well, I have told him,
specifically,

"you stay home
with the monkey in my brain,

Who I asked to please
never come back again."

And I-- this time,
I really yelled.

I yelled so much that my
neighbor came to the door

And said,
"is everything okay ?"

And I said,
"everything is fine.

"I've asked the monkey in my
brain to please quiet down

And take the bird
in my mouth with it."

So, this time, jim,
I'm not worried about it.

Plus, I called my doctor,

And he said I could up my
meds just for the day.

I think that's
a wonderful idea.

It's gonna, y'know, dry me up
like there's no tomorrow,

But it's worth it for this.

Is it true that you are
on three different kinds

Of antipsychotic
medication ?

Yes, it is.

That's working out for you ?

You're able to function
on the job properly ?

No, not so well.

Not so well.

Something here
about a suicide attempt.

Is that--
yes.

They pick on you,
don't they ?

They do.

I get picked on
a lot.

Trudy, they're
not your friends.

No, I know that,
but, you know...

You know who
is your friend.

Who ?

Mike powers
is your friend.

Really ?

You betcha.

Well, I do have
some dirt,

So I could be
of great use--

What did you hear
about officer jones ?

He's a spiteful...
Hateful...

Violent ?

Violent.

Da... Nger...

...To this force.

And if I were
in charge,

I would get rid
of him immediately.

Thank you.
Who else ?

Garcia ?

Out.

Dangle ?

He, uh, f-f-f--

Frust--

He's fru--
he's frustrated.

Since...
Since...

Sexual...

Sex-- since sexual...

Is that so ?

Yes, sir, yes.

You say he's
unprofessional.

Oh, very unprofessional.

Very unprofessional.
Very, very.

I'll tell you
one thing.

Yeah ?

Jones and garcia,
they killed that guy.

Everybody knows it,
everybody knows it.

Thank you, officer wiegel.

You're absolutely
welcome.

Can I go now ?

You did good, trudy.

My kingdom needs
more children.

Sheriff's department.

Excuse us, folks,
excuse us.

Excuse us.

Hello ?

Show's over.

Back at 3:00,
back at 3:00.

No, no back at 3:00.
The show's over.

Last time I checked,
this was a free country.

Listen, man,
listen, listen.

You've been
warned a couple times,

And you can't do
the puppet show

Here in the park.

Oh, yes, sir,
yes, sir.

I didn't know I
was in... Russia.

Look, I'm doing this
for funzies.

This is out of
pocket for me, okay ?

I don't-- this is--

I don't work because
I'm on disability,

So I have
the free-- I'm not--

My wife is on
disability.

We both have--

If you just eat pancakes,
you can stretch it like crazy.

Poor dear, she's 350 pounds.

When she walks,
her legs break.

So that's the problem
at my home.

Someone called in
and said that there was

Something sexually suggestive
going on here.

Lewd and lascivious
behavior.

When I'm doing
the puppet show,

I mean, I'm not here, okay ?

I'm a channel
for the puppets.

If they have a story
to tell,

It's not up to
me what they say.

Open the curtain !

Now !

Oh, oh...
Oh, oh...

Let me explain
this first.

Please don't leave.

There goes
my audience.

People, don't leave.

What's the matter
with you ?

Now you've ruined--

There was an illusion here,
and now it's gone

Because they know it's
me and not a magical snake.

Get out, get out !
Come on out of there !

Oh !
Oh, man !

Very bright out.

My pants ?

Please, this is
puppet theater.

Like I have time to worry
about what I'm gonna wear.

I'm in a box, and it's
hot in there.

Plus, I need a lot
of freedom of movement.

Next show, 3:30 !

No, no, no !

Wow.

That was some turkey
dinner, huh, carlo ?

I'm stuffed.

Let's hit
the road.

Stuffed ?

That's funny 'cause we had
stuffing as a side...

Dish with our turkey.

( wailing siren )

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Y'all, hold up
right there.

Y'all ain't going nowhere.

But we haven't had any
alcohol or booze or pills.

Oh, yeah, what do
you call this ?

A turkey leg.

That's not drugs.

The hell it ain't !

People, don't let
this happen to you.

Get the facts.

The truth is tryptophan,
a hormone found in turkey,

Acts like a tranquilizer

And can be a silent killer
behind the wheel.

So, the next time
you have to drive...

( all )
have a tuna sandwich and some melon

Instead of turkey.

Number four,
give me, like,

You're-caught-in-a-funky-
disco-wind-tunnel robot.

( jones )
aw, see.

Doesn't look like
a wind tunnel.

( wiegel )
I think that looks like a wind tunnel.

Okay, pretty good,
actually, guys.

I thought
it was really good.

Don't-- what did I say
about the button ?

I'm sorry,
it was great.

I'm in charge of the button.

Number three, you've been sent
from the future to rock us.

How about that ?

Give that
a shot.

That's pretty
good at that.

Is that a lighter
or something ?

( jones )
yeah, that was a lighter.

Knock it off, stop.

I can't fuckin' stand
these motherfuckers.

If we get
them off the street,

Out of the public eye for
six or eight hours,

We're doing a service.

Guys, could I-- will you please
let me out of here ?

I'm starting to feel like
I'm ex-ing a little bit.

The most important thing

About this investigation
with the d.A.

Is that I know for a fact

We have an ace
up our sleeve.

And the ace up
our sleeve...

Is sheriff
walter chechekevitch,

Who, believe it or not,

Is a very good man
in a tight corner.

♪ I wish I were in
dixie away, away... ♪ sir ?

Sir.

Um, sheriff ?

Sheriff ?

♪ ...Look away,
look away ♪

♪ a way down
south in-- ♪

Sheriff ?
Sir.

Good morning.

Good morning, sir.

There's some very serious
accusations

Regarding the reno
sheriff's department.

And you are sheriff
of reno.

Is that correct, sir ?

Sir, I am.

And how long have you
been sheriff of reno ?

22 years, sir.

And how would you describe
the behavior

Of this department ?

Top-notch, sir.
Mm-hmm.

Sir, how--
if I can ask you--

How often are you
actually in

The reno
sheriff's department ?

Oh, I would say--

And when I say that, sir,

I mean the actual
physical building.

Oh, one or two days
a week, at least.

It's sort of
a part-time thing for you

Is what you're saying.

Well, no, I mean,
as the commanding officer,

I am called into the field
for any kind of...

Well, is that field actually
in the state of nevada, sir,

Is my question.

The great state of nevada.

The great--

I have over 67 counts
from citizens of reno

Against this department.

Now, are you,
are you all right, sir ?

What is that ?

Sheriff, that's
a bulletin board.

If you could please keep your
attention focused up here,

That would help
me a great deal.

♪ I wish I were in
dixieland away, away ♪

♪ away down south
in dixieland... ♪

Sheriff, sheriff ?

Thank you white boy--
looking for a "t".

Come on, roll them bones,
roll them bones.

Oh, oh, oh !

There you go !

Hey !

Go, go, go, go !

Run !

I'm gonna get you,
I'm gonna get you !

Oh, hey, no.

Hey, I ain't
going nowhere.

I ain't going nowhere.

What's up,
what's up ?

Got a little crap game
going, huh ?

We just doing
a little do, man.

Doing a little do.

Those are my legitimate
earnings, man.

What you
doin' with that ?

You know this
is illegal.

The lloyd's bar
people called.

They said
you're running craps.

You're comping drinks,

Which you can't be doing,
to their bar.

Now, now, now,
see, now, see, that--

Under normal circumstances,
if this was, like,

An illegal-type
situation like that--

Which it is.

No, this, this is a
legitimate indian casino.

Is that your
peace pipe there, hoss ?

I am 1/16, uh, quashahaw.

Excuse me,
come again ?

Quashahaw indian.
Quashahaw ?

Hey, spell it
for me real quick.

In indian
or in white man's ?

You know, for you
to come up here and deny me

My ethnicity and
my heritage ?

You know, you come up here

Trying to take
our land again !

No, no, no, no,
sir, sir, sir, sir, sir,

You're not indian,

And you're not allowed
to run a craps game.

I got a tribal permit.

You got a
tribal permit ?

Can I see it, please ?

It's in smoke signals.

'cause, we don't-- hey, our
culture's different from y'alls.

Man, we don't, like, write

Everything
down on paper, you know ?

We put things in, like,
smoke and feathers

And stuff, man.

Time to go,
time to go.

Give me this.

Come on, man !

Give a
brother a break.

Ha, "brother",
he said, "brother" !

Indians don't say
"brother" !

Indians don't say
"brother" motherfucker !

( man on loudspeaker )
watch commander to the bridge.

Watch commander
to the bridge.

Surprise !

Happy birthday !
Oh, my gosh !

I can't
believe this !

What ?

I didn't even know--

I didn't know you even
knew it was my birthday.

Of course I knew
it was your birthday.

Well, this is great.

Do you want to
blow them out ?

Yes.

( blowing )

Wait, blow harder.

I don't think it's--

No, blow harder.

( chuckling )

Good, you have good,
strong, lungs still.

...You really thought
I could do it from there.

There's a surprise in there
for you that I--

Oh, really,
what is it ?

She put a surprise
in the cake.

No, craig, it's a
surprise in the cake.

A surprise like
a cracker jack surprise.

Sort of.

Like, a special filling
that's in the cake

That you might be
able to find useful.

Useful filling.

Besides eating it,
I can do something else

With the filling ?

That sounds
like fun.

I don't-- I don't think
you're getting it.

It's...

...Something I can eat
and use at the same time.

Yeah, craig, something
you can eat and use

At the same time.

You'll figure
it out.

I can't wait to figure
this thing out.

Yeah, anyway.

( whispering )
craig.

( whispering )
yes.

What else can I do
with the filling ?

It's a file in--

Oh.

Hey, what's up ?

I'm-- I-- the walls
are pretty thick.

( dangle )
why are you bobbing and weav--

Am I-- is this a--

Why are you bobbing
and weaving on me ?

Are you trying to get me
to say something ?

I feel like
you're holding back.

I'm not holding anything back,
I'm just trying to make sure

My balls don't pop
out again, okay, sir ?

You ever get into any sexual
indiscretions with him ?

I'm just asking.

It's... Just
you and me here...

And all these other
people, but--

I think, sir,
what we have here

Is not so much a question
of racial intolerance

But perhaps
lactose intolerance.

Would you say
that's true ?

This guy asked us
to do this, okay ?

And I think the truth

Is often a very difficult
and painful thing to confront,

And you should all be
commended

For your honesty
and your candor

During these proceedings.

Chikawa.
( junior ) chikawa.

Yeah, the chikawa indians.

Chikawha.

Are they
a plains indian,

Or are they the ones
who live in the--

No, man, we beautiful !

A beautiful,
proud people !

Being 1/16 indian,

Then this area of roughly
15 square feet around me

Is considered indian land,

So I can do
whatever I want on it.

Hey, look, you just trying
to oppress me.

This is like
general custard--

This is general custard
all over again.

Custer, custer,
it was "custer."

He wasn't a delicious
frozen dessert.

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