All language subtitles for The.Love.Boat.S05E24.Isaac.Gets.Physical.1080p.WEB-DL.AAC2.0.H.264-squalor_track3_[eng]

[Theme music]

Theme song: Love, exciting
and new, come aboard.

We're expecting you.

And love, life's sweetest
reward, let it flow.

It floats back to you.

The love boat soon will
be making another run.

The love boat promises
something for everyone.

Set a course for adventure,
your mind on a new romance.

And love, won't hurt anymore.

It's an open smile
on a friendly shore.

It's love.

Welcome aboard, it's love.

[Music playing]

[Horn tooting]

[Hooting and hollering]

Hot dog!

This is what I
call the ok corral.

[Hooting]

[Horn tooting]

Julie, did you book a rodeo on
this cruise without telling me?

No, sir, that's just a
bunch of fun-loving texans

out to have a good old time.

[Hooting and hollering]

Well, come on, my
little buckaroos.

Let's lasso some lassies.

[Horn tooting]

Somehow I don't
think we'll be seeing

them a your bridge tournament.

Have a nice cruise.

Dr. Bricker?

Hi.

Carlene glover,
reporting for sea duty.

Carlene glover, you
must be the nurse the line

said they were sending.

That's me, carlene
glover, registered nurse.

Have thermometer, will travel.

Hey, fellas, here's
somebody I'd like you to meet.

Carlene glover, this is gopher
Smith, Isaac Washington.

Hello.

Hello.

Carlene's a nurse.

She's here to give
the entire ship's

company physical examinations.

What?

Since when do we need
physical examinations?

Oh, it's a new company policy.

But I'm sure you got
nothing to worry about.

Now, carlene, if
there's anything you need,

don't hesitate to
give me a call.

I'll show you my office,
help you get set up.

Oh, thanks, doc.

But I wouldn't
want to bother you.

But I'm sure it wouldn't
be any bother for Isaac.

Would it?

Uh, uh, no.

It's all right.

Sure.

Hey, you two,
no physicals until

the official starting time.

Do we really have
to take a physical?

Don't worry about it.

You look real
healthy to me, sugar.

See you later, sugar.

Would you like
one lump or two?

See you later.

Carter.

Julie, hi.

Julie.

Muffy, hi.

Hi.

Captain stubing, Vicki,
I'd like you to meet

my cousin, Carter Randall.

Well, how do you do?

Good.

And this is his childhood
sweetheart, muffy.

- Hello.
- Welcome aboard.

I'm sure you'll
enjoy the cruise.

If you'll excuse us.

Oh, Carter, why didn't
you tell me you were coming.

We wanted to surprise you.

And we've got
another surprise.

We're getting married when
the ship docks in acapulco.

Oh, congratulations.

That's terrific.

Thanks.

Gee, it didn't occur to me.

You're the c. Randall
on promenade 350.

And muffy, you're
right next door, 352.

That's just until
after the wedding.

Then those cabin arrangements
are going to change.

She's going to be in 350,
and I'm going to be in 352.

I think we'll see you later.

Yeah.

Glad you two are
finally getting married.

So are we.

Bye.

Julie, you've got to get
me out of this wedding.

You've got to.

I'm desperate.

I don't see him.

Maybe he got stuck in traffic.

Oh, Debbie.

Is your fiance going to be
late for the wedding, too?

Mom, he'll be here.

And you're going to love him.

That's and order.

And what if I don't?

Well, then I'll just
have to marry him anyway.

Oh, I was afraid of that.

I'll go check us in.

All right, love.

[Music playing]

Millicent?

Ted?

Oh.

I can't believe it.

It's been almost a
quarter of a century.

There must be a kinder
way of putting it.

Millicent holton, the first
woman I ever fell in love with.

And Ted Anderson, the first
man who ever broke my heart.

Well, if I'd know you were
going to stay so pretty,

I'd have never let you get away.

I kept trying to tell you,
but you wouldn't listen.

Ed, hi, sweetheart.

Well, I see you've
already met my mom.

So, what do you think of
your future son-in-law?

Well, I will have
to get to know him.

We just met.

Well, don't you worry.

I'm sure that you'll learn
to love him as much as I do.

[Ship's horn blowing]

[Music playing]

I don't know
about this physical.

I don't like strangers
poking around my body.

Since when?

If you're real good
and promise not to cry,

I'll see you get
an extra lollipop.

Next.

That's me.

Sit right down here.

I'll be with you in a
minute, Isaac, honey.

Oh, Isaac, you know I've got
some free time coming up.

And I would just love you
to show me around the ship.

Well there really
isn't that much to see.

You know, you've seen one
ship, you've seen them all.

But I haven't
seen one ship yet.

This will be my first.

What about four o'clock?

Isaac: Four o'clock, well
that's my busiest time.

Oh.
Five.

Isaac: That's even busier
than my busiest time.

Six?

Isaac: Sorry, I'm busy.

(Screaming) Aaaaa!

Sorry.

Are you ok?

No, no, no, no problem.

Don't even worry about it.

Didn't hurt a bit.

Your turn, Isaac.

I guess that's the
last you'll see of him.

Oh, don't worry.

I mean, he can't go too
far unless he's part tuna.

[Music playing]

Wee!

Whoop!

Hey!

[Horn tooting]

Whoa, darling.

Hey, I like that bathing
suit you don't have on.

[Horn tooting]

[Hooting and hollering]

Julie, thanks for
meeting me here.

I told muffy I need a
breath of fresh air.

Hey, Carter, what's
the problem with you two?

Julie, I just can't go
through with this marriage.

Why?

Muffy's such a nice girl.

That's exactly the problem.

I can't face a lifetime of nice.

Well, it sure beats
a lifetime of nasty.

Julie, you don't understand.

You see, muffy's not passionate
enough, not romantic enough.

Julia, you've got to help me.

Help you?

What can I do?

Find another guy for muffy.

Get her so interested in him
that she'll want to dump me.

Carter, I am shocked.

I can't do that.

Muffy's too nice.

Julie, I just told you.

I've had enough of nice.

If I could get rid of the
nice, that would be nice.

Do you mind if I
tell you something?

What?

That's not nice.

Well, if it isn't
Isaac Washington,

the amazing
disappearing bartender.

Carlene is looking for you.

Listen, and I saw
what she did to you,

I wasn't going to hang around
and get my arm taken off.

Isaac, come on.

Now, this is just me, all right?

Your friend, gopher?

What's the real reason you don't
want to take that physical?

Promise not to tell?

Promise.

Everyone in my family
has high blood pressure.

Doesn't mean you do.

I know that I do.

And if I take that
test, and my blood

pressure is a little high,
the line is going to fire me.

Isaac, if it's that
serious, maybe you

ought to do something about it.

No way.

I feel fine.

But you know how doctors are.

They're always going to make
a big deal out of everything.

Besides, that nurse
carlene thinks

that the hippocratic oath
includes dining and dancing.

Whoops.

Gopher, have you seen Isaac?

Are you kidding me?

He's right here.

Ah, no, I haven't seen him.

Well, when you do
see him, tell him

I made him another
appointment for his physical,

tonight at 7:30 sharp.

- Yes, I'll tell him.
- Thanks.

Um hm.

Psst.

Is she gone?

She was gone,
but now she's back.

I'll see you
tonight, 7:30 sharp.

And don't worry.

If you can stay in that
deep knee bend that long,

then you're in good shape.

And, of course, there's
another good reason

for marrying the boss.

See, when ed tells me that he's
working late at the office,

I don't have to worry because
I'll be there with him.

How about some drinks?

Oh, I'll get them.

You and mom get acquainted.

Ok?

Let's sit down.

It is a little
complicated, isn't it?

More than a little, Ted.

When she told me that her
new boss was ed Anderson,

I never made the
connection with you.

I gave up Ted when
I went into business.

I figured it more, um,
dignified being Edwin.

The whole thing is incredible.

You, of all people,
marrying my daughter.

Yes, I know.

To think that 25 years ago it
was you I was going to marry.

Mm, three years before
your fiance was even born.

I have to be honest, Ted.

I don't think that
you and Debbie

are right for each other.

Millicent, I think you're
letting our past influence

Debbie's future.

Maybe, and maybe not.

[Music playing]

You told me he was
older than you are,

but you didn't tell me
he was twice your age.

I really don't
care how old he is.

He's the right man for me.

Ah, you won't
be saying that 20

years from now,
when you're pushing

him around in a wheelchair.

Oh, all I know is that when
he kisses me, well, bells ring.

But, darling, bells ringing
isn't always a sign of love.

I mean, it could be an alarm
telling you to get out fast.

Oh, Debbie, there are a lot of
nice eligible men around that

are closer to your age.

But I love ed.

Oh, mom, now listen.

When we go to
dinner tonight, I'll

come a little bit late so
that you can visit with him

first and get to know him.

Come on, give him a chance.

Debbie, be there's something
that you ought to know.

Oh, now, mom, just
remember how important

it is to me that you like him.

[Music playing]

I'll try.

Thank you.

[Music playing]

Hi.

Good evening, nurse glover.

Oh, good evening,
captain and Vicki.

Oh, I see you
found our diet cake.

Oh, enjoy it.

So how are your
physicals coming along?

Oh, just fine, except
for Isaac standing me up

for the second time in one day.

He must be like me,
one of those people

who hates taking physicals.

I can't understand it.

How can anyone
resist being poked

with needles, hit with
hammers, and feeling an icy

stethoscope on his chest?

Don't worry, carlene.

If Isaac keeps stalling,
I'll have a talk with him.

No, no, please, I would like
to handle this my own way.

Is your own way a sneaky way?

A very sneaky way.

Sneaky ways are
always the best way.

- Yeah.
- We'll see you later.

- Ok.
- Good bye.

It was so kind of you
to invite me to join you.

Oh, nonsense, Pete.

When I heard you
order a single table,

I knew that we would
never forgive ourselves

if we let you dine alone.

After all, these cruises
are for making new friends.

Right, muffy?

Absolutely.

Enchanting, isn't she?

Yes, very.

And you know, when I saw
that you were reading chaucer,

I knew that you and muffy would
have so much to talk about.

You have an
interest in chaucer.

Oh, he's my favorite.

Mine too.

I'm completing the
definitive study on him.

An expert on chaucer?

I want to know all
about your studies.

[Clears throat] Uh, would
you two excuse me for a moment?

You don't mind if I
leave you alone together?

Of course not.
Take your time.

Thanks.

Julie.

Yeah.

I think I've done it.

Don't they look great together?

Carter, are you sure you
know what you're doing?

Oh, yeah, yeah.

I've got it all planned.

They'll take a little
midnight stroll on the deck,

have a little
tete-a-tete in his room.

Uh huh.

And before long,
there'll be wedding bells--

his, not mine.

Good idea if he's willing
to give up the seminary.

He's a priest?

Not yet, but you have two
weeks to talk him out of it.

This man you married, Debbie's
father, what was he like?

Oh, an average guy--

I guess I was on the
rebound after you.

And I married the first
man who came along.

We were divorced when Debbie
was just a little girl.

Yeah, I got married too.

It lasted three years.

I've lived the life of
a bachelor ever since.

And then Debbie
came to work for me.

Do you know?

Maybe I fell in love with Debbie
because she reminded me of you.

Ed.

Yes?

Even if there weren't this
age difference between you

and Debbie, could
you comfortably

be married to the
daughter of a woman

that you were once in love with?

Millicent, I was very
much in love with you.

But that was a long time ago.

It's like something I read about
in a book rather than something

in my own life.

I see.

Well, if you'll excuse me, i--

I think I'll skip dinner.

Mom, where are you going?

I seem to have
lost my appetite.

I'll see you later.

Ed, what happened?

What's wrong with my mother?

Oh, I don't know.

Maybe she's having
trouble getting

used to calling me "son."

[Music playing]

[Country dance music playing]

Carter, let's go
upstairs on the deck

and take a walk
in the moonlight.

Yeah, we can do that.

But wouldn't you rather stick
around and dance a little bit?

You like to dance.

Yeah, but you don't

I know, but I shouldn't
stand in your way.

If you want to dance with
somebody else, I'd understand.

I'd be jealous,
but I'd understand.

The moonlight is so pretty.

What?

The moonlight, it's beautiful.

Right.

Carter, I'm going out on
the deck to take a walk.

All right, I'll join you
in a minute-- in a minute.

Hi, doc.

How are you doing?

Great.

Boy, those cowboys sure
make out like bandits.

[Rowdy music playing]

Doctor, thanks for
the prescription.

Thank you.

Isaac, fiesta 123 wants a
Magnum of champagne delivered

to their cabin right away.

A Magnum?

That sounds like a good party.

I better deliver that myself.

Now remember,
you're still on duty.

I know.

I know.

But if I'm not back in
three days, send caviar.

[Music playing]

Room service.

It's open.

Would you, uh, like me
to open your champagne?

Carlene.

Well, you can open it,
honey, because we're going

to drink to your good health.

That is, once you
pass the physical.

[Music playing]

Howdy, little lady.

I'm Jim Billy James
of Austin, Texas.

And you're about the prettiest
looking little heifer

I've seen on this old tub.

Oh, thank you.

Now, you want to tell me
what a pretty little girl

like you do is doing all
alone on a moonlit night

like tonight?

Well.

Hey, you don't
have to answer that.

Because you're
not alone anymore.

Jim Billy is here.

Wait a minute.
You can't.

You don't-- you
don't understand.

What's to understand, but
one good kiss deserves another?

[Music playing]

You know, I'm in
love with you, and I

don't even know your name.

After that kiss, I
don't even know my name.

I've got to go.

What?

And break old Jim Billy's heart?

When can I see you again?

You can't

I've got to.

How about breakfast?

No.

Maybe.

Maybe later.

Good night, Jim Billy.

Good night, my little darling.

Yahoo!

[Music playing]

A little Sherry.

Yes.

Thank you, captain, for
brightening up what was looking

like a very dreary evening.

Is there anything
else I can do?

I'm afraid not--

family problems.

Mother, I have to talk to you.

Well, must it be now?

Yes, it must be now.

There's absolutely no excuse
for the way you've been acting.

I'm sure you'll excuse me.

Are you trying to
embarrass me to death?

What is wrong with you?

I think you know
what's wrong with me.

Ed is the man that
I love, and you're

not even giving him a chance.

Debbie, I think you're being
a little unfair to your mother.

Unfair?

I am hardly the one
who's being unfair here.

Debbie, darling, I
didn't mean to upset you.

I just didn't want you
rushing into marriage.

Come on.

That is just an excuse.

You can't accept the fact that
I'm in love with an older man.

What are you talking about?

All right, ladies,
I don't think this

is the time or the place
for this conversation.

I want to talk about this.

Now, mom, maybe you don't know
how it feels to be in love.

Just because you had
an unhappy marriage

doesn't mean that I'm going to.

Debbie, be don't think
that we need to air

our dirty laundry in front of--

--a perfect stranger?

Well he may be a stranger to
you, but he is perfect to me.

Debbie, you've gone too far.

It's not my fault
that you've never

loved a man in your whole life.

Oh, yes, I have.

Ask your perfect stranger.

Oh, I'm sorry, Debbie.

I didn't ever mean
to tell you that.

Debbie, it was
a long time ago.

[Music playing]

Well, uh, how am I?

I think you're just fine.

I'm talking
about the physical.

Well, let's see.

Your lungs are clear.

Your heart is good and strong.

Your blood pressure
is a little high.

It is?

Well, that's because
you got me all excited.

Oh, well, let's see what
we can do about raising

my blood pressure.

Carlene, um, you know?

I've got an idea.

Can we talk about it.

Sure, but talking
just tires out the lips

for the good stuff.

Oh. Tickle, tickle, tickle.

Listen, come on, carlene.

Just--

I can't come on any
more than I already am.

Isaac, something happens
when we're together.

Can't you feel it?

Uh, yeah, I can feel it.

It's the door know in my back.

[Music playing]

Jim Billy?

Hm?

Oh.

No, my name's Melvin.

Excuse me.

I was looking for a
cowboy with a mustache.

Well, you give me a
half hour, I'll grow one.

Thank you.
I'm sorry.

Excuse me, muffy.

There's a phone call for you

oh, a phone call for me?

Look, if you change your
mind, the name's Melvin.

Phone call from who?

Well, he didn't
seem too sure himself.

First he said his name Jim.

Then he said his name was Billy.

Right.

Anyway, they want
you on the phone.

Thank you.

Jim Billy, what a surprise.

Surprise?

You mean to tell me
you weren't planning

on showing off that sexy new
outfit for old Jim Billy?

Sexy, me?

Where did you see me?

Oh, I walked by
while your eyes

were closed, sunning yourself.

I gotta tell you, girl, I
had to go back to my cabin

and lie down a spell.

Jim Billy's old heart can't
take that much action.

Well, uh, you're
pretty exciting yourself.

Listen, when we
get into acapulco,

there's a private little beach
that I've been dying to go to.

I hear it's great for
moonlight skinny dipping.

Are you interested?

Skinny dipping?

Well, now what about
that handsome critter

traveling with you?

Handsome?

Oh, Carter?

Well, he's nice.

But see, that's
just the problem.

He's just nice.

When it comes to romance
and stuff, he's zero.

Zero?

Worse than zero.

Well, what are
you doing with him?

I can't hurt his feelings.

But look.

I'll see you tonight after I
get a chance to get rid of him.

Ok?

Yeah.

You get rid of him.

Sounds like a real jerk.

Bye.

[Music playing]

[Rapid knocking on door]

Isaac?

Isaac: Yeah, come in.

I came as quick as I could.

You sounded upset on the phone.

What's up?

My blood pressure,
that's what's up.

And carlene put
it on her report.

Well, you're not going to give
up without a fight, are you?

Gopher, I can't hit a woman.

And unless I can get carlene
to change that report,

I can kiss my job goodbye.

Isaac, rather
than kiss your job

goodbye, why don't you
try kissing carlene hello?

Gopher, I want to
keep my job, but there

are limits to what I'll do.

I'll do it.

[Music playing]

Millicent, she just
won't talk to me.

She won't open the door, and
she won't even answer the phone.

Well, I couldn't
get her to open

our connecting door all night.

She totally ignored me.

But then, if I heard something
like that from my mother,

I guess I wouldn't be
talking to me either.

It had to be
quite a blow to her.

I'm sorry, ed.

I just blurted it out.

I didn't mean to say it.

I know that.

You know, I gave it a
lot of thought last night.

Maybe I've been wrong.

What happened between
us is all in the past.

And what I should
really care about

is my daughter's happiness.

Now that sounds like the
Millicent I know and love.

I hope it isn't too late though.

Well, I'm the one that botched
things up, so it's up to me

to straighten it out.

I'll let her think about
it a little while longer,

and then I'll try
to talk to her.

In the meantime,
I seem to remember

you liking to take long walks.

I still do.

Shall we?

You know, you're
quite a team--

you inviting me to taste
a walk, and my daughter

tells me to take a hike.

I think mine is
a better offer.

Come on.

[Music playing]

[Knocking on door]

Come in.

Sweet rolls and coffee break.

Oh, Isaac, how'd you
know I like sweet rolls?

I don't know.

Why, thank you.

That's very thoughtful.

Well, it's the least I could
do for the prettiest nurse

on the ship.

Well, I'm glad to see you've
finally come to your senses.

Well, I may be slow out of the
gate, but I'm a fast finisher.

You know, I was wrong to
run out on you last night.

Carlene, now I know that
everything I want in life

is right here in this cabin.

Well, come and get it.

[Moans]

[Screams]

What's the matter, darling?

Passion.

Passion.

It's, uh, it's too
early in the day for me.

I'm an animal-- an animal.

See you later, animal.

[Music playing]

Debbie, Debbie, I've
got to talk to you.

I'd rather not.

No, I would rather not go
on playing hide-and-seek.

Yeah, well I have
nothing to talk about.

Sit down.

Now, what I want to say is--

is that nobody has done
anything to hurt you.

Ed and I are two people from
another time, another world.

He loves you.

And for whatever it's
worth, you have my blessing.

That's all I have to say, except
take one tip from your mother.

I can't change the past,
but I can change the future.

He's a wonderful man.

Don't let him get away.

[Music playing]

Hello.

Doc?

Carlene?

Let's see, Washington,
Washington, Washington.

All right, let's see.

Nope.

This is one way to lower
your blood pressure.

She sure knows how
to open a door.

Yes, I would like to sit down.

Debbie, I know you're having a
hard time accepting all this.

But I want you to
know I love you.

Do you really love me?

Of course, I do.

Enough to marry me?

Of course.

Oh, ed, I really do love you.

Hey, we just made up.

You can do better than that.

I didn't hear the bells
as loud as I usually do.

Well, let's see what
I can do about that.

[Music playing]

Announcer (on loudspeaker):
Welcome to glorious acapulco,

ladies and gentlemen.

It's a beautiful day.

Temperatures are in the high
80s with balmy tropical breezes.

Enjoy the fine beaches
and water sports, or treat

yourself to an exciting tour.

Hi, Carter.

What's the matter?

You look terrible.

Thank you.

I feel terrible.

The wedding's off.

Well, I don't understand.

I thought that was
what you wanted.

It was.

But I didn't think it
would happen like this.

Muffy's fallen in
love with another man.

Who?

Me.

Let me get this straight.

The wedding's off because
muffy's fallen in love

with you?

Right?

Wrong.

She fell in love with Jim
Billy James from Austin, Texas.

Wait a second.

I thought you said she
was in love with you.

She is.

I'm him.

What I mean is, I
became Jim Billy

James to lure her away from me.

And now I've lost
her to him, who's me.

The three of you
will be very happy.

There's so much passion
hidden in that woman.

Would you believe it,
she asked me to go skinny

dipping with her tonight?

You gonna go?

No, she didn't ask me.

She's going with
Jim Billy James.

[Music playing]

Carlene, don't you worry.

I'll deliver Isaac.

Trust me.

[Knocking on door]

Come in.

Doc, you wanted to see me?

Isaac, Isaac, what
happened to your hand?

Oh, I got a splinter.

Is that all you want
to see me about?

Oh, no, you've got
bigger problems than that.

Isaac, here, sit down.

It's a wonder you were
able to walk in here.

Well, what do you mean?

Well, carlene showed
me your medical report.

You've got a serious
blood pressure problem.

That can't be.

It says so right here.

Your blood pressure
is 40 over 20.

Is that bad?

Bad?

Napoleon has been
dead since 1821,

and he still has
higher blood pressure.

Isaac, based on this report, I
have no choice but to recommend

your dismissal.

[Chuckles] Wait a minute, doc.

That report's not right.

That's not my real
blood pressure.

See, I snuck in and
changed the report

because I thought it
was a little too high,

and I didn't want to get fired.

Isaac, I know you'd say
anything to save your job.

I'd do the same thing
myself in your position.

I wish I could help you.

But there's really
nothing I can do.

I'm sorry.

You gotta believe me, doc.

Look at me.

I'm healthy Isaac.

Come on now.

You've got to tell those people
that-- that I'm all right.

Isaac, it's not up to me.

You'll have to speak to carlene.

She's in charge.

Ok, all right.
All right.

Listen.

Ok, I'll talk to her.

Just don't turn in
that report until I've

finished talking to her, ok?

Carlene?

He fell for it.

He's all yours.

[Music playing]

Now, to the bride
and to the groom.

I wish you both a long
and happy life together.

Thank you.

And, to one of the most
wonderful women in the whole

world, my future mother-in-law.

Well, captain,
I think we should

leave the happy couple alone.

I totally agree.

Good night.

- Good night.
- Good night.

- Good night, darling.
- Good night.

It's amazing how
it all worked out.

Fantastic, except
for one thing.

What?

Wrong bride.

You should be
marrying my mother.

You're still in love with her.

Debbie, what are
you talking about?

Seeing her again awakened
all those old feelings.

Maybe I haven't been
around as long as you have,

but I sure know what two
people in love look like.

So do I, you and me.

Oh, ed, you're
such a gentleman.

So you think you're
honor-bound to go

through with our marriage.

But you're not being
honest with yourself.

Debbie, your mother
and I are just friends.

Well, that makes three of
us that are just friends,

because the way you've
been kissing me lately,

the sound of those bells
just keeps getting fainter.

Go find her, ed.

Don't let her get
away a second time.

[Music playing]

Julie (on loudspeaker):
For you late starters,

there's still time for an
authentic Mexican dinner

in acapulco, or a romantic
stroll on the beach.

But remember, we
sail at midnight.

[Music playing]

Carter, what are
you doing here?

I came here
because I know you're

supposed to meet somebody else.

What are you talking about?

About Jim Billy.

How did you find
out about Jim Billy?

Because I was there when you
were kissing him last night.

Oh, Carter, I'm sorry.

Oh, I feel so ashamed.

I was there because it
was me you were kissing.

He came along and just
swept me off my-- what do you

mean it was you I was kissing?

I'm Jim Billy James.

Carter, that's ridiculous.

Jim Billy is--

--is from Austin, Texas.

And you're about the
cutest little heifer

on this whole tub.

Heavens.

Muffy, listen to me.

Things between us have
always been so nice.

I was afraid that life with
you was going to be boring,

so I wanted you to
fall for another guy

and get me off of the hook.

But I was wrong.

I know now that you're all
the woman I could ever want.

Carter, I have a confession .

I was afraid that life
would be dull with you too.

So I tried to stay
that nice little muffy.

But I'm not that
nice little muffy.

And you're not that
nice old Carter.

I think we're lovers.

Yeah, lovers.

Well all right, girl!

Yee haw!

[Music playing]

Milly?

Ed?

Where's Debbie?

She asked me to come
out here and talk to you.

She has this idea that
you and I are in love,

and that we're the ones who
should be getting married.

Well, that's ridiculous.

Absurd.

We couldn't possibly be in love.

Of course not.

Absolutely impossible.

Ridiculous.

Ludicrous.

Preposterous.

[Music playing]

Milly, will you marry me?

Oh, I've been waiting 25
years to hear you say that.

And I've been
waiting 25 years too.

Don't make me wait one more
second before you say yes.

Yes.

[Music playing]

It's open.

Entree.

Carlene, listen.

I have to--

oh, I'm sorry.

I'll come back when
you're dressed.

I am dressed.

Get back in here.

Come on.

Sit down, sugar.

Oh, what happened
to your handy-wandy?

Oh, I got a little
splinter-winter in it.

Baby.

Uh, carlene, carlene.

Huh?

I need your help.

Oh, I need your help too.

I can't open this champagne.

Could big, strong Isaac open
this for poor little carlene?

In a minute.

In a minute.

You see, carlene, i'd
like to talk to you

about high blood pressure.

Oh, let's not
talk about medicine.

This is my night off.

Well, every
night's going to be

my night off if I lose my job.

You see, carlene, I changed
the blood pressure on my report

and made it too low.

Why did you do a
dumb thing like that?

Because I thought
it was too high,

and I was going to get fired.

Now you gotta tell doc
that it's all right,

that I'm not really sick.

Oh, he knows that.

Do you think you could
change that report

without us finding out?

Well--

you were never going to
get fired in the first place.

See, Isaac, the company
does not fire people

for having high blood pressure.

They treat them for it.

With a change of diet
and proper medication,

most people live long lives.

Well, then I was right.

High blood pressure
isn't that big a deal.

It sure is a big deal if
you don't take care of it.

And I wouldn't want anything
to happen to someone as nice

as you are.

I'm not losing my job.

I better get back to work.

Oh, but, Isaac, it
seems a shame to waste

such expensive champagne.

You're right.

I'll see if I can
get you a refund.

I just remembered.

We don't give refunds.

[Music playing]

Julie: Bye, enjoyed
sailing with you.

I'll see you again next time.

Bye bye.
- Julie.

Yeah?

You are going to come to
the wedding, aren't you?

You two are getting
married this time?

This time, yes, we are.

I'm glad because you two
sure make a nice couple.

Uh uh uh.

[Clears throat]

Oh, I'm sorry.

I didn't mean nice.

You're not nice,
not nice at all.

Thank you, Julie.

Thank you.

Bye bye.

Good luck.

Bye bye

come on, baby, let's git.

Bye.

Come and see us again.

Well, I hope you had
a pleasant cruise.

We certainly did.

I met an old friend.

Oh, how wonderful.

I even did better than that.

I met my future bride.

Oh, well how ever wonderfuler.

We're working on her grammar.

Bye bye, captain, Vicki.

Mom, ed.

I brought you something.

Oh, how sweet Debbie.

I didn't know the
gift shop was open.

Well, it's not
from the gift shop.

It's from my heart.

Oh.

I thought we'd keep the
engagement ring in the family.

And I can't think of a
better family to keep it in.

Shall we go?

Bye, carlene.

It was great
having you with us.

Aw, great being here.

Now, Isaac, I hope you
remember everything

I taught you last night.

What did she teach
you last night?

Well, she taught me to
cut out salt, watch my diet,

and to get plenty of exercise.

And what else?

And you taught me never to
let a desirable young woman such

as yourself slip through
my fingers again.

Ooh, nice job.

As you know, doc, that's what
we call preventive medicine.

[Theme music]