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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:51,384 --> 00:00:53,351 All righty. 2 00:00:53,352 --> 00:00:57,122 I'm thinking something cocoa. 3 00:01:00,726 --> 00:01:01,859 Oh, no. 4 00:01:02,862 --> 00:01:05,029 Oh, for the love of Pete. 5 00:01:07,299 --> 00:01:09,968 Don't panic. Don't panic. All right. What else we got here? 6 00:01:09,969 --> 00:01:13,304 Fiber, fiber, fiber. Bran, bran. 7 00:01:13,305 --> 00:01:15,073 Thank you, Arthur. 8 00:01:17,026 --> 00:01:18,677 Okay. Keys. 9 00:01:19,645 --> 00:01:21,196 Purse. 10 00:01:21,197 --> 00:01:23,230 Sunglasses. Okay, bye, honey. 11 00:01:23,231 --> 00:01:24,231 Sweetie, uh... 12 00:01:24,232 --> 00:01:26,184 trying to keep it together here, 13 00:01:26,185 --> 00:01:28,002 and know that I'm not mad at you. 14 00:01:28,003 --> 00:01:30,688 I'm mad at the situation. 15 00:01:30,689 --> 00:01:33,742 We're out of Cocoa Puffs. 16 00:01:33,743 --> 00:01:36,628 So? There's a whole cabinet full of cereal there, hon. 17 00:01:36,629 --> 00:01:38,914 Thank you, but I'm plenty regular. Um... 18 00:01:41,567 --> 00:01:43,401 See, you told me if I wanted something 19 00:01:43,402 --> 00:01:45,754 to put it on the shopping list, which I did. 20 00:01:45,755 --> 00:01:49,925 If you can look here, see? Cocoa Puffs, four boxes. 21 00:01:49,926 --> 00:01:52,193 I'm doing my part. 22 00:01:52,194 --> 00:01:53,445 I'm just not understanding 23 00:01:53,446 --> 00:01:56,431 where we're going off the tracks. 24 00:01:56,432 --> 00:01:57,832 Let me tell you something, Doug. 25 00:01:57,833 --> 00:01:59,901 I had a total of four hours sleep, 26 00:01:59,902 --> 00:02:01,803 and that's because I spent the other 20 hours 27 00:02:01,804 --> 00:02:03,538 working on three different projects. 28 00:02:03,539 --> 00:02:05,507 And it's all stuff that I haven't done before, 29 00:02:05,508 --> 00:02:09,043 so if I hear the words "cocoa" or "puff" one more time, 30 00:02:09,044 --> 00:02:11,813 you will be eating my fist for breakfast. 31 00:02:13,499 --> 00:02:15,734 I'm just saying the list was your idea. 32 00:02:21,207 --> 00:02:22,557 All right, gang, it's story time, 33 00:02:22,558 --> 00:02:26,527 so cell phones off, Heffernan on. 34 00:02:26,528 --> 00:02:28,596 All right, you know that guy I'm delivering to, 35 00:02:28,597 --> 00:02:31,266 the guy who's becoming a woman? 36 00:02:31,267 --> 00:02:33,284 Well, the beard is still there, 37 00:02:33,285 --> 00:02:37,389 but as of yesterday, the boobs are in. 38 00:02:37,390 --> 00:02:39,140 Big ones? 39 00:02:39,141 --> 00:02:40,976 No. He went small and perky. 40 00:02:40,977 --> 00:02:43,862 Damn. If you're gonna do it, how do you not go huge? 41 00:02:43,863 --> 00:02:46,064 Exactly. I mean, I'm a B cup, and I've done nothing. 44 00:02:50,336 --> 00:02:51,603 he's squeezing 'em together, 45 00:02:51,604 --> 00:02:53,888 and leaning in, and I'm giving him nothing, you know? 46 00:02:53,889 --> 00:02:56,991 Hey, guys, I want to introduce you to, uh, Tim Murphy. 47 00:02:56,992 --> 00:02:58,577 Hey. What's up, man? 48 00:02:58,578 --> 00:03:01,830 Guy, what are you doing? I'm in the middle of my story. 49 00:03:01,831 --> 00:03:03,498 I'm just introducing my new trainee. 50 00:03:03,499 --> 00:03:05,483 You're training somebody? 51 00:03:05,484 --> 00:03:07,852 What's your first lesson gonna be, 52 00:03:07,853 --> 00:03:11,256 how to drive a 14-foot truck under a 13-foot underpass? 53 00:03:12,324 --> 00:03:15,043 All right. The sign was covered with ivy, all right? 54 00:03:15,044 --> 00:03:16,044 It was, like, a year ago. 55 00:03:16,045 --> 00:03:17,479 When are you gonna let that go? 56 00:03:17,480 --> 00:03:20,815 Probably when somebody does something stupider, so never. 57 00:03:20,816 --> 00:03:22,734 Hey, but at least he got to drive back to the depot 58 00:03:22,735 --> 00:03:26,855 in a convertible. You know what I'm sayin'? 59 00:03:38,784 --> 00:03:41,119 Hi. I'm Michelle. 60 00:03:41,120 --> 00:03:43,121 They sent me from upstairs. 61 00:03:43,122 --> 00:03:45,356 I just told Patty that the specs aren't ready yet. 62 00:03:45,357 --> 00:03:47,375 Oh, no. 63 00:03:47,376 --> 00:03:48,710 I'm your assistant. 64 00:03:48,711 --> 00:03:49,577 My what? 65 00:03:49,578 --> 00:03:51,046 Your assistant? 66 00:03:51,047 --> 00:03:53,281 No, I don't... have an assistant. 67 00:03:53,282 --> 00:03:54,782 I am an assistant. 68 00:03:54,783 --> 00:03:58,103 Miss Boone said you could use some extra help. 69 00:03:58,104 --> 00:04:01,489 Okay. Is this a practical joke? 70 00:04:01,490 --> 00:04:03,358 Did Debbie put you up to this because I said 71 00:04:03,359 --> 00:04:05,777 her ankle boots made her look slutty? 72 00:04:05,778 --> 00:04:08,980 No. Here's the assignment memo. 73 00:04:11,116 --> 00:04:14,185 Mm. So you're really my assistant? 74 00:04:14,186 --> 00:04:17,539 Yes. So what can I do for you? 75 00:04:17,540 --> 00:04:19,023 Um, okay, hold on. I'm new at this. 76 00:04:19,024 --> 00:04:20,258 I'll find something. Um... 77 00:04:20,259 --> 00:04:22,127 Looks like you could use some more coffee. 78 00:04:22,128 --> 00:04:24,028 Yes. Yes, I should've thought of that. 79 00:04:24,029 --> 00:04:25,062 Yeah. Cream and sugar. 80 00:04:25,063 --> 00:04:26,147 Okay. Okay. 81 00:04:26,148 --> 00:04:27,782 And make it snappy. 82 00:04:27,783 --> 00:04:29,668 I'm kidding. I was just doing a thing. 83 00:04:29,669 --> 00:04:30,835 Oh yeah. Nah. 84 00:04:30,836 --> 00:04:32,020 Okay, so I'm looking at him, 85 00:04:32,021 --> 00:04:34,022 and I never thought I'd say this to another man, 86 00:04:34,023 --> 00:04:37,676 but I was like, "dude, you gotta put on a bra. " 87 00:04:37,677 --> 00:04:39,577 You know, either that or go up a button, 88 00:04:39,578 --> 00:04:40,979 'cause it's so annoying. 89 00:04:40,980 --> 00:04:42,681 Speaking of annoying, we had that guy, 90 00:04:42,682 --> 00:04:44,215 sounded like Gilbert Gottfried: 91 00:04:44,216 --> 00:04:46,818 You want me to sign this? Okay. 92 00:04:46,819 --> 00:04:48,953 Should I have a lawyer present? 93 00:04:48,954 --> 00:04:52,240 The thing is, I don't trust you people. 94 00:04:52,241 --> 00:04:53,558 That's the deal. 95 00:04:55,494 --> 00:04:57,128 That was a good impression. 96 00:04:57,129 --> 00:04:59,447 Yeah, that was a real treat. All right, anyway, uh... 97 00:04:59,448 --> 00:05:01,750 So the guy's staring at me- 98 00:05:01,751 --> 00:05:02,717 Who else do you do? 99 00:05:02,718 --> 00:05:04,869 Can you do Eartha Kitt? 100 00:05:04,870 --> 00:05:06,504 You guys like Adam Sandler? 101 00:05:06,505 --> 00:05:08,506 All right. Here's some Adam Sandler for you: 102 00:05:08,507 --> 00:05:11,109 Hey, uh, you guys are very nice people. 103 00:05:11,110 --> 00:05:13,261 I've had a great time, uh, on my first day. 104 00:05:13,262 --> 00:05:15,046 I just don't know what I.P.S. stands for. 105 00:05:15,047 --> 00:05:16,180 I think it stands for 106 00:05:16,181 --> 00:05:18,549 Immature People Sitting around doing nothing. 107 00:05:18,550 --> 00:05:20,018 Hee-hee-hee, hoo-hoo-hoo. 108 00:05:20,019 --> 00:05:21,970 That is dead on, man. 109 00:05:21,971 --> 00:05:25,940 Oh, thanks, buddy. You're too kind. Danke. 110 00:05:28,894 --> 00:05:31,028 What's that? Lunch Thursday? I don't know. 111 00:05:31,029 --> 00:05:34,332 I'm gonna have to check with my assistant. Tell you what, 112 00:05:34,333 --> 00:05:37,301 why don't you have your assistant call my assistant? 113 00:05:37,302 --> 00:05:39,570 What's that? You don't have an assistant? 114 00:05:39,571 --> 00:05:41,322 Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. 115 00:05:41,323 --> 00:05:42,774 Hey, honey. 116 00:05:42,775 --> 00:05:44,509 Remember last week, I made that delivery 117 00:05:44,510 --> 00:05:46,945 and that little dog bit my ankle? Doug, 118 00:05:46,946 --> 00:05:49,264 you are not gonna believe what happened to me at work today. 119 00:05:49,265 --> 00:05:51,216 They gave me an assistant. 120 00:05:51,217 --> 00:05:53,200 That's great. Nobody deserves it more than you. 121 00:05:53,201 --> 00:05:58,556 Now... what's a funnier animal than a dog? 122 00:05:58,557 --> 00:06:00,258 What are you talking about? 123 00:06:00,259 --> 00:06:02,110 I need a great story to tell the guys tomorrow, 124 00:06:02,111 --> 00:06:04,596 so I need a funnier animal. 125 00:06:04,597 --> 00:06:06,481 I don't know. Just name an animal. 126 00:06:06,482 --> 00:06:08,233 All right. An eagle. 127 00:06:08,234 --> 00:06:10,784 Okay. Uh... 128 00:06:10,785 --> 00:06:13,938 you wanna explain to me how an eagle's gonna bite my ankle? 129 00:06:13,939 --> 00:06:16,775 You know what, Doug? I don't have time for this. 130 00:06:16,776 --> 00:06:19,778 Why don't you call my assistant 131 00:06:19,779 --> 00:06:22,246 and set up a meeting. 132 00:06:23,716 --> 00:06:25,416 I got it. Would it be okay if I told that story 133 00:06:25,417 --> 00:06:27,535 about when you got the ultrasound of your ovary? 134 00:06:27,536 --> 00:06:30,255 No, you cannot tell that story. What are you, an idiot? 135 00:06:30,256 --> 00:06:32,790 Come on. It looked like Shrek. 136 00:06:37,680 --> 00:06:40,548 Okay. I delivered the TRDs to the third floor, 137 00:06:40,549 --> 00:06:42,150 picked up the lease applications, 138 00:06:42,151 --> 00:06:44,886 and here's your fruit salad, no grapes. 139 00:06:44,887 --> 00:06:47,088 Wow. That was a productive 10 minutes. 140 00:06:47,089 --> 00:06:49,524 So what should I do now? 141 00:06:49,525 --> 00:06:52,177 Damn it. All right, here's something you can do. 142 00:06:52,178 --> 00:06:53,444 Get me a pair of work boots 143 00:06:53,445 --> 00:06:56,281 so I can kick the crap out of this computer. 144 00:06:56,282 --> 00:06:57,348 Anything I can help with? 145 00:06:57,349 --> 00:06:59,484 Oh, no. These are budget breakdowns. 146 00:06:59,485 --> 00:07:01,452 They're pretty complicated. 147 00:07:01,453 --> 00:07:05,189 I've done those before. Let me take a look. 148 00:07:05,190 --> 00:07:06,758 Okay. 149 00:07:06,759 --> 00:07:09,260 You know, you should do it in two columns. 150 00:07:09,261 --> 00:07:10,695 It's much faster. 151 00:07:10,696 --> 00:07:13,130 Oh. Like that? 152 00:07:13,131 --> 00:07:19,737 No. It's actually more like this. 153 00:07:19,738 --> 00:07:22,373 Okay. Then you just cut and paste, and hit control-k, 154 00:07:22,374 --> 00:07:23,942 which brings you to the bottom line, 155 00:07:23,943 --> 00:07:26,678 which gives you your total. 156 00:07:26,679 --> 00:07:27,912 Huh. 157 00:07:27,913 --> 00:07:29,981 And then you just drag and drop the tax rates 158 00:07:29,982 --> 00:07:31,148 and you're finished. Oh. 159 00:07:31,149 --> 00:07:32,617 You want me to do another one? 160 00:07:32,618 --> 00:07:36,604 Yeah. Why don't you just go ahead and try a few more there. 161 00:07:36,605 --> 00:07:39,273 All right. I'm glad you're all gathered, 162 00:07:39,274 --> 00:07:41,742 'cause you're about to hear the tale of a driver, 163 00:07:41,743 --> 00:07:43,411 a swollen ankle, 164 00:07:43,412 --> 00:07:46,414 and get this, an iguana. 165 00:07:46,415 --> 00:07:48,449 Hey, Doug, you mind? 166 00:07:48,450 --> 00:07:50,151 Uh, show's about to start. 167 00:07:50,152 --> 00:07:52,086 What show? 168 00:07:52,087 --> 00:07:54,655 Hoo-ah. 169 00:07:54,656 --> 00:07:56,257 I hope you boys are ready 170 00:07:56,258 --> 00:07:59,560 for retired Colonel Frank Slade, 171 00:07:59,561 --> 00:08:02,013 reporting for duty. Hoo-ah. 172 00:08:02,014 --> 00:08:05,282 Hey, that's, uh, that's pretty funny. How old is that movie? 173 00:08:05,283 --> 00:08:06,951 Was it, like, early '80s or something? 174 00:08:06,952 --> 00:08:08,536 You're overthinking, Heffernan. 175 00:08:08,537 --> 00:08:10,305 Just enjoy it. 176 00:08:10,306 --> 00:08:12,106 Hey, guys, guys. Watch this. 177 00:08:12,107 --> 00:08:17,211 All right. Christopher Walken as an I.P.S. driver. Go. 178 00:08:17,212 --> 00:08:18,345 All right. 179 00:08:18,346 --> 00:08:20,231 Listen... 180 00:08:20,232 --> 00:08:23,568 the address on your package is smudged. 181 00:08:25,788 --> 00:08:28,839 Is that a two or a seven? I don't know. 182 00:08:28,840 --> 00:08:32,577 It's a quandary that's perplexing me. Come on. 183 00:08:33,996 --> 00:08:36,331 Finally some real laughs around here. 184 00:08:36,332 --> 00:08:38,466 Danny, can I- 185 00:08:38,467 --> 00:08:41,753 Ah. What can I do you for? 186 00:08:41,754 --> 00:08:43,337 You know lunchtime is my time. 187 00:08:43,338 --> 00:08:44,923 Why are you pushing the new guy? 188 00:08:44,924 --> 00:08:46,223 You wanna know why? 189 00:08:46,224 --> 00:08:47,892 Because the sign 190 00:08:47,893 --> 00:08:51,763 was covered with ivy. 191 00:08:51,764 --> 00:08:54,933 So that's what this is about? 192 00:08:54,934 --> 00:08:57,602 Yeah, it is. Yeah. See, Tim doesn't take shots at me. 193 00:08:57,603 --> 00:08:59,770 There are no victims in his comedy. 194 00:08:59,771 --> 00:09:02,406 It just makes you feel good. 195 00:09:10,499 --> 00:09:14,369 Hey, did I ever tell you Carrie's ovary looks like Shrek? 196 00:09:14,370 --> 00:09:18,489 That's your wife, man. 197 00:09:18,490 --> 00:09:21,593 Why would you tell me something like that? 198 00:09:21,594 --> 00:09:24,278 'Cause it's funny. 199 00:09:38,027 --> 00:09:39,927 Hey, Carrie, we're heading out for happy hour. 200 00:09:39,928 --> 00:09:41,279 You wanna come? Oh, thanks. 201 00:09:41,280 --> 00:09:44,482 I'm pretty swamped here. 202 00:09:44,483 --> 00:09:48,286 Oh, too bad. It's dollar shooters at Tooty McGee's. 203 00:09:48,287 --> 00:09:49,537 Maybe next time. 204 00:09:49,538 --> 00:09:50,454 Okay. 205 00:09:50,455 --> 00:09:52,489 Carrie, I could finish these if you wanna go. 206 00:09:52,490 --> 00:09:55,660 Oh, I couldn't ask you to do that. 207 00:09:55,661 --> 00:09:58,413 Could I? 208 00:09:58,414 --> 00:09:59,747 I'd be happy to. 209 00:09:59,748 --> 00:10:02,984 Really? Okay, thanks. Hold up, Lisa. 210 00:10:07,506 --> 00:10:08,940 Hey, baby. 211 00:10:08,941 --> 00:10:11,742 I got taquitos for dinner. Is that okay? 212 00:10:14,012 --> 00:10:17,614 Taquitos give me gas... 213 00:10:19,818 --> 00:10:22,803 So you gotta ask yourself one question. 214 00:10:24,306 --> 00:10:27,575 Do you feel lucky, punk? 215 00:10:28,676 --> 00:10:31,612 Why are you calling me "punk"? 216 00:10:31,613 --> 00:10:35,083 I'm doing an impression of somebody. 217 00:10:35,084 --> 00:10:38,453 Who? My dad? 218 00:10:38,454 --> 00:10:41,005 No. 219 00:10:41,006 --> 00:10:45,076 My friends call me Clint. 220 00:10:48,279 --> 00:10:49,563 Eastwood. 221 00:10:49,564 --> 00:10:52,266 Clint Eastwood. How do you not get that? 222 00:10:52,267 --> 00:10:56,303 I'm sorry, honey. I'm sorry. I had five shooters. 223 00:10:56,304 --> 00:10:58,005 Excuse me, ma'am. 224 00:10:58,006 --> 00:10:59,673 I'm sorry to bother you there, 225 00:10:59,674 --> 00:11:02,193 but, uh, you said 226 00:11:02,194 --> 00:11:03,877 you had, uh, five shooters, 227 00:11:03,878 --> 00:11:05,913 and there were six shooters at the crime scene. 228 00:11:05,914 --> 00:11:08,616 That's all I'm saying. 229 00:11:08,617 --> 00:11:11,069 Why are you talking like that? 230 00:11:11,070 --> 00:11:14,906 You mean, why am I talking exactly like Columbo? 231 00:11:14,907 --> 00:11:17,325 What are you doing? I don't know. 232 00:11:17,326 --> 00:11:19,710 Why don't you ask Dee from What's Happening? 233 00:11:19,711 --> 00:11:24,515 Ooh, you in trouble, Raj. 234 00:11:24,516 --> 00:11:27,385 I'm tellin' mama. 235 00:11:31,473 --> 00:11:33,925 Now you're just creeping me out. 236 00:11:35,326 --> 00:11:38,596 The thing is, Danny's new trainee. 237 00:11:38,597 --> 00:11:41,548 He does all these impressions, and the guys love it. 238 00:11:41,549 --> 00:11:44,902 I don't know. It's just that I'm the funny guy at work. 239 00:11:44,903 --> 00:11:46,104 Really? 240 00:11:46,105 --> 00:11:48,238 Yes. 241 00:11:48,239 --> 00:11:49,707 Forget it, all right? 242 00:11:49,708 --> 00:11:51,442 I'm sorry I brought it up. 243 00:11:51,443 --> 00:11:54,795 Oh, honey, I'm sorry. 244 00:11:54,796 --> 00:11:57,097 No, I mean, you are funny. 245 00:11:57,098 --> 00:11:59,333 That's one of the reasons why I fell in love with you, 246 00:11:59,334 --> 00:12:01,501 because you always make me laugh. 247 00:12:01,502 --> 00:12:03,704 But not by doing lame impressions. 248 00:12:03,705 --> 00:12:06,491 Just by being yourself. 249 00:12:08,727 --> 00:12:11,512 Maybe- Maybe you're right. 250 00:12:11,513 --> 00:12:13,748 So, Warren, 251 00:12:13,749 --> 00:12:15,315 how was your day? 252 00:12:16,852 --> 00:12:20,687 Well, today I delivered to a lumber yard. 253 00:12:20,688 --> 00:12:21,822 Whoa. 254 00:12:26,044 --> 00:12:28,913 That- That sounds pretty cool. 255 00:12:28,914 --> 00:12:30,381 Yeah. 256 00:12:30,382 --> 00:12:33,985 It was like going to a family reunion. 257 00:12:37,739 --> 00:12:42,109 Get it? Because I'm made of wood. 258 00:12:42,110 --> 00:12:44,978 Wood lumber yard. 259 00:12:52,754 --> 00:12:55,973 What else is in the news? 260 00:12:55,974 --> 00:12:58,625 This is physically painful. 261 00:13:06,668 --> 00:13:10,071 Okay. Here are the budget breakdowns. 262 00:13:10,072 --> 00:13:11,838 Ah. Great job. 263 00:13:11,839 --> 00:13:13,991 That's what I'm here for. 264 00:13:13,992 --> 00:13:15,575 Yeah? 265 00:13:15,576 --> 00:13:17,778 Here are the budget breakdowns. 266 00:13:17,779 --> 00:13:19,080 Great job. 267 00:13:19,081 --> 00:13:20,998 That's what I'm here for. 268 00:13:20,999 --> 00:13:23,284 You know, Carrie, you've always been a good assistant, 269 00:13:23,285 --> 00:13:26,921 but lately, the quality of your work has really skyrocketed. 270 00:13:26,922 --> 00:13:29,290 It's like all of a sudden, you get it. 271 00:13:29,291 --> 00:13:31,075 Yeah. I feel like I get it. 272 00:13:34,046 --> 00:13:37,181 Hey, Deac, tomorrow at lunchtime, 273 00:13:37,182 --> 00:13:39,333 round up the guys, 'cause the Amazing Flame-o 274 00:13:39,334 --> 00:13:42,720 is gonna be spittin' fire. 275 00:13:42,721 --> 00:13:43,521 Doug- No, it's easy. 276 00:13:43,522 --> 00:13:45,222 I just coat my mouth with lighter fluid, 277 00:13:45,223 --> 00:13:46,390 then it's like: 278 00:13:49,127 --> 00:13:51,445 That's entertainment. 279 00:13:51,446 --> 00:13:53,231 All right, brother. Sit down. 280 00:13:53,232 --> 00:13:54,815 Why? Well, we need to talk. 281 00:13:54,816 --> 00:13:56,350 Now, what's up with you, man? 282 00:13:59,204 --> 00:14:01,088 Just the new driver, Tim. 283 00:14:01,089 --> 00:14:04,174 I mean, everyone knows I'm the funny guy around here, 284 00:14:04,175 --> 00:14:06,093 but then he comes in with his impressions, 285 00:14:06,094 --> 00:14:08,028 and he just steals my thunder. 286 00:14:08,029 --> 00:14:10,081 It's messed up. You know what I'm saying? 287 00:14:10,082 --> 00:14:14,168 You know, I- I'm pretty funny. 288 00:14:14,169 --> 00:14:15,336 What? 289 00:14:15,337 --> 00:14:16,904 Well, you said you were the funny guy, 290 00:14:16,905 --> 00:14:19,223 but, you know, I get some laughs around here, too. 291 00:14:19,224 --> 00:14:21,592 Maybe nervous ones. You're like seven feet tall. 292 00:14:21,593 --> 00:14:24,428 At least I didn't go out and buy myself a puppet. 293 00:14:24,429 --> 00:14:27,548 I didn't buy it. It's a rental, Lurch. 294 00:14:29,451 --> 00:14:31,518 Hey, my boy Tim just radioed in. 295 00:14:31,519 --> 00:14:34,121 He's on a record pace for Zone 6. Yeah? 296 00:14:34,122 --> 00:14:36,324 Fast and funny. Ha ha. 297 00:14:36,325 --> 00:14:38,743 And you might want to be here when he gets back. 298 00:14:38,744 --> 00:14:42,863 He's gonna do a medley of every Baldwin brother. 299 00:14:42,864 --> 00:14:45,132 Cool. 300 00:14:54,492 --> 00:14:56,961 Zone 6, Zone 6, come in, Zone 6. 301 00:14:56,962 --> 00:14:59,263 Dispatch for Zone 6. 302 00:14:59,264 --> 00:15:01,165 Yeah. Go, dispatch. 303 00:15:01,166 --> 00:15:04,468 Yeah. Murphy, got a couple late night pick-ups for you. 304 00:15:04,469 --> 00:15:07,271 Uh, first I'm gonna need you to go into Manhattan, 305 00:15:07,272 --> 00:15:11,008 Uh, 125 MacDougal Street. 306 00:15:11,009 --> 00:15:15,279 Then you gotta come back out on the Triborough Bridge, 307 00:15:15,280 --> 00:15:17,915 and head on over to LaGuardia. 308 00:15:17,916 --> 00:15:21,068 Okay. What terminal? 309 00:15:21,069 --> 00:15:22,235 Air... 310 00:15:22,236 --> 00:15:25,323 Jordan. 311 00:15:25,324 --> 00:15:28,125 Uh, dispatch, that routing sounds a little off. 312 00:15:28,126 --> 00:15:30,744 Oh, that routing sounds a little off? Does it sound a little off? 313 00:15:30,745 --> 00:15:32,513 Let me tell you something there, Murphy. 314 00:15:32,514 --> 00:15:37,184 You've been working here a day. I've been here for 27 years. 315 00:15:37,185 --> 00:15:39,019 Okay. Sorry. I'm sorry. 316 00:15:39,020 --> 00:15:43,057 That's all right, kid. I know you're nervous. 317 00:15:43,058 --> 00:15:48,129 Now, how familiar are you with New Jersey? 318 00:15:53,902 --> 00:15:57,854 So, Danny, where's your, uh, trainee? 319 00:15:57,855 --> 00:16:00,191 He'll be here. Really? 320 00:16:00,192 --> 00:16:04,445 Well, it looks like Rich Little is Rich Little late. 321 00:16:06,214 --> 00:16:07,698 It looks like his next impression 322 00:16:07,699 --> 00:16:09,667 is gonna be of a guy looking for a new job, right? 323 00:16:09,668 --> 00:16:11,735 Yi-e-yi. 324 00:16:11,736 --> 00:16:15,456 Would you like paper or plastic? Yi-e-yi. 325 00:16:20,195 --> 00:16:21,796 Hey, I ever tell you guys the story 326 00:16:21,797 --> 00:16:24,999 of a hot cup of coffee, a giant pothole, 327 00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:27,685 and a scar down south? 328 00:16:29,854 --> 00:16:33,391 Hey, guys, a call just came in about Tim. He's, uh- 329 00:16:33,392 --> 00:16:34,391 He's what? He's lost, 330 00:16:34,392 --> 00:16:36,977 and he's calling his mommy to pick him up? 331 00:16:39,064 --> 00:16:40,231 Nah. He's in the hospital. 332 00:16:40,232 --> 00:16:41,866 Huh? What happened? 333 00:16:41,867 --> 00:16:43,651 He was somewhere in Jersey, and he got jumped. 334 00:16:43,652 --> 00:16:44,884 Why the hell was he in Jersey? 335 00:16:44,885 --> 00:16:46,437 I don't know, but some guys 336 00:16:46,438 --> 00:16:48,939 pulled him out of his truck and beat him pretty severely. 337 00:16:54,579 --> 00:16:55,830 Hey, Carrie. 338 00:16:55,831 --> 00:16:58,332 Oh, morning, Miss Boone. Um- 339 00:16:58,333 --> 00:17:00,467 I've got a project I'd like you to take a shot at. 340 00:17:00,468 --> 00:17:02,303 It's normally something I'd handle, 341 00:17:02,304 --> 00:17:05,206 but you've proven you're up to the challenge. 342 00:17:05,207 --> 00:17:06,307 What do you say? 343 00:17:06,308 --> 00:17:08,625 Uh, well... 344 00:17:10,145 --> 00:17:11,929 Bring it on. 345 00:17:11,930 --> 00:17:13,214 Great. Okay. 346 00:17:15,033 --> 00:17:17,101 Sorry I'm late, Carrie, 347 00:17:17,102 --> 00:17:18,468 but I-I-I just found out 348 00:17:18,469 --> 00:17:21,322 my boyfriend's been transferred to Denver. 349 00:17:21,323 --> 00:17:23,807 Oh, you poor thing. 350 00:17:23,808 --> 00:17:27,111 Would getting right to work take your mind off of it? 351 00:17:27,112 --> 00:17:29,914 No. I- I'm going with him. 352 00:17:29,915 --> 00:17:32,482 We're planning on getting married, 353 00:17:32,483 --> 00:17:34,184 so I'm sorry, 354 00:17:34,185 --> 00:17:37,671 but Friday's gonna have to be my last day. 355 00:17:37,672 --> 00:17:39,723 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 356 00:17:39,724 --> 00:17:41,926 Back it up. 357 00:17:41,927 --> 00:17:43,426 Why? What's wrong? 358 00:17:43,427 --> 00:17:46,347 Do you even know this guy? I mean, where'd you guys meet? 359 00:17:46,348 --> 00:17:48,466 In ninth grade. 360 00:17:48,467 --> 00:17:50,768 Ninth grade? Now, what is this, 361 00:17:50,769 --> 00:17:54,171 an arranged marriage by the village elders? 362 00:17:54,172 --> 00:17:56,640 You gotta play the field a little bit, you know? 363 00:17:56,641 --> 00:17:58,976 I don't wanna play the field. 364 00:17:58,977 --> 00:18:01,779 You know, um, I didn't want to have to tell you this, 365 00:18:01,780 --> 00:18:04,414 but remember when you brought him here? 366 00:18:04,415 --> 00:18:06,784 He hit on me. 367 00:18:06,785 --> 00:18:08,218 What? 368 00:18:08,219 --> 00:18:10,671 Yeah. Yeah. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 369 00:18:10,672 --> 00:18:13,491 I just- I just don't want you to get hurt. 370 00:18:13,492 --> 00:18:14,825 You know what doesn't hurt? 371 00:18:14,826 --> 00:18:17,294 A hard day's work. 372 00:18:17,295 --> 00:18:20,831 You know, Carrie, I've got a lot of sick days saved up, 373 00:18:20,832 --> 00:18:25,052 so I think I'll use them and make today my last day. 374 00:18:25,053 --> 00:18:26,770 Okay. I'm gonna level with you, all right? 375 00:18:26,771 --> 00:18:30,407 Um, I've been given an incredible opportunity 376 00:18:30,408 --> 00:18:32,760 based on your talent and hard work. 377 00:18:32,761 --> 00:18:34,512 So how about this? 378 00:18:34,513 --> 00:18:38,164 Stay, and I'll give you the big desk. 379 00:18:38,165 --> 00:18:39,500 Huh? 380 00:18:39,501 --> 00:18:41,034 Bye, Carrie. 381 00:18:41,035 --> 00:18:42,353 Okay, fine, go. 382 00:18:42,354 --> 00:18:45,538 I think I can handle my work on my own, thank you. 383 00:18:51,095 --> 00:18:53,797 No idea what I'm looking at here. 384 00:18:59,087 --> 00:19:01,255 That's it. They pull me out of my truck, 385 00:19:01,256 --> 00:19:03,240 I turn into Sam Kinison. I'm sittin' there goin': 386 00:19:03,241 --> 00:19:06,644 You know, I don't think there's anywhere on this route 387 00:19:06,645 --> 00:19:09,046 where I was supposed to pick up a beating. Oh. 388 00:19:09,047 --> 00:19:10,213 Ohh. 389 00:19:11,783 --> 00:19:13,083 You jerks. 390 00:19:13,084 --> 00:19:14,969 Oh, man. Half dead 391 00:19:14,970 --> 00:19:16,920 and he's still slaying us. 392 00:19:16,921 --> 00:19:19,789 We love you, man. 393 00:19:19,790 --> 00:19:21,675 What were you doing in Jersey, anyway? 394 00:19:21,676 --> 00:19:22,743 Dispatch sent me. 395 00:19:22,744 --> 00:19:25,229 But I guess some guy was playing a joke on me, so... 396 00:19:25,230 --> 00:19:26,863 Some joke. What a jerk. 397 00:19:26,864 --> 00:19:29,433 Can you believe that? 398 00:19:34,506 --> 00:19:36,306 Listen, we're gonna let you get some rest. 399 00:19:36,307 --> 00:19:37,874 All right. You're an inspiration. 400 00:19:37,875 --> 00:19:38,875 Thanks for coming. 401 00:19:38,876 --> 00:19:40,828 Feel better, brother. Thank you. 402 00:19:40,829 --> 00:19:42,963 Take care. Thank you so much. 403 00:19:42,964 --> 00:19:44,964 All right, I'll talk to him. 404 00:19:44,965 --> 00:19:48,201 You're still going to hell, but give it a shot. 405 00:19:49,870 --> 00:19:51,088 Hey, man, what have you- 406 00:19:51,089 --> 00:19:52,923 You got there, a sprain? 407 00:19:52,924 --> 00:19:55,692 No. It's a shattered elbow and my ligaments are all torn up. 408 00:19:55,693 --> 00:19:58,261 But, uh, they're gonna give me a year of physical therapy, 409 00:19:58,262 --> 00:20:00,263 and I'll get back to about 60 percent mobility. 410 00:20:00,264 --> 00:20:01,432 Sixty? 411 00:20:01,433 --> 00:20:02,433 That's great. 412 00:20:02,434 --> 00:20:05,402 Hey, when you hit 70, sell. 413 00:20:05,403 --> 00:20:08,038 Um... 414 00:20:08,039 --> 00:20:11,942 Look, Tim, this is all because of me. 415 00:20:13,177 --> 00:20:14,778 What do you mean? 416 00:20:14,779 --> 00:20:18,032 It was me on the radio. I- I sent you to those places. 417 00:20:18,033 --> 00:20:20,016 That was you? Yeah, but I swear to you, 418 00:20:20,017 --> 00:20:21,301 I never meant for you to get hurt. 419 00:20:21,302 --> 00:20:24,622 I was just trying to get you fired. 420 00:20:24,623 --> 00:20:26,540 What did I do to you? 421 00:20:26,541 --> 00:20:30,711 Well, you were gettin' laughs at lunch. 422 00:20:30,712 --> 00:20:31,845 So? 423 00:20:31,846 --> 00:20:33,914 So, it's just that... 424 00:20:33,915 --> 00:20:37,101 I'm the funny guy at lunch. 425 00:20:37,102 --> 00:20:38,302 Really? Yes. 426 00:20:38,303 --> 00:20:41,071 Why is everybody fighting me on this? 427 00:20:41,072 --> 00:20:43,373 Anyway, it was a really stupid thing to do, 428 00:20:43,374 --> 00:20:45,476 and I'm so, so sorry. 429 00:20:45,477 --> 00:20:48,512 I would totally understand if you reported me to Mr. O'Boyle, 430 00:20:48,513 --> 00:20:50,780 and had me stuck on the night shift, 431 00:20:50,781 --> 00:20:55,986 but I think I know a cool guy when I see one. 432 00:21:00,241 --> 00:21:02,359 Senor Doug. 433 00:21:18,292 --> 00:21:19,593 Huh. 434 00:21:19,594 --> 00:21:22,296 They finally cut the ivy off that sign. 435 00:21:33,391 --> 00:21:35,558 Oh, great. 31205

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