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1
00:00:06,506 --> 00:00:08,073
A- bub-bub-bub-bub!
2
00:00:08,140 --> 00:00:09,774
You have a seat, young lady.
3
00:00:09,842 --> 00:00:12,378
Today, I am taking
care of breakfast.
4
00:00:12,445 --> 00:00:13,845
Whatever you're in the mood
for, you just name it.
5
00:00:13,913 --> 00:00:15,113
Oh! Ok.
6
00:00:15,181 --> 00:00:18,183
Um, how about a short
stack of pancakes?
7
00:00:18,969 --> 00:00:20,886
Ok, I'm making eggs.
8
00:00:20,953 --> 00:00:23,155
Ok. I'll have 2, sunny side up.
9
00:00:24,574 --> 00:00:25,541
Already scrambled.
10
00:00:25,609 --> 00:00:26,958
Perfect! Perfect.
11
00:00:28,161 --> 00:00:31,696
Whoop. Got a little
shell in there.
12
00:00:31,764 --> 00:00:33,482
Jeez.
13
00:00:33,550 --> 00:00:35,150
All right, here we go.
14
00:00:37,220 --> 00:00:39,321
Come on, buddy.
15
00:00:39,389 --> 00:00:42,657
Take it to the edge.
Take it to the edge!
16
00:00:42,725 --> 00:00:44,460
Take it to the edge - I got it.
17
00:00:44,527 --> 00:00:46,041
I got it.
18
00:00:46,150 --> 00:00:46,782
Dammit!
19
00:00:48,781 --> 00:00:51,317
It's all right. Take
it to the edge.
20
00:00:51,384 --> 00:00:53,051
Not gonna work - I'm
just gonna grab it here.
21
00:00:53,119 --> 00:00:54,152
I got it. I got-whoop!
22
00:00:54,221 --> 00:00:55,654
I got a hair in there.
23
00:00:57,056 --> 00:00:58,823
Take it to the edge.
24
00:00:58,891 --> 00:01:02,094
Take the hair to the edge.
25
00:01:02,162 --> 00:01:03,395
I got it.
26
00:01:03,463 --> 00:01:05,481
We're all good.
27
00:01:05,549 --> 00:01:08,250
What the hell is that?
28
00:01:08,318 --> 00:01:10,653
You know what? I'm just gonna
grab something at work.
29
00:01:10,720 --> 00:01:12,354
Come on!
30
00:01:12,422 --> 00:01:15,090
Whatever it is, the heat'll kill it.
Just stay!
31
00:01:52,929 --> 00:01:53,863
Hey, Arthur.
32
00:01:53,930 --> 00:01:54,997
Hey.
33
00:01:55,064 --> 00:01:56,799
Um, is Carrie home?
34
00:01:56,867 --> 00:01:58,734
Nope, they're out with friends.
35
00:01:58,802 --> 00:02:00,920
I just finished watching
TV in their bed.
36
00:02:00,987 --> 00:02:02,154
Mum's the word.
37
00:02:02,222 --> 00:02:04,874
She said she had a
book on résumé writing
38
00:02:04,941 --> 00:02:05,875
that she would loan me.
39
00:02:05,942 --> 00:02:07,509
I- I gotta find a new job.
40
00:02:07,577 --> 00:02:09,979
My unemployment runs
out in, like, a week.
41
00:02:10,046 --> 00:02:13,215
Ah, yes, no more sucking
on the taxpayer's teat!
42
00:02:14,232 --> 00:02:17,242
Right, Would you happen to
know where that book is?
43
00:02:17,280 --> 00:02:20,080
Spencer, how-to books are a waste of time.
44
00:02:20,423 --> 00:02:23,125
I can teach you everything
you need to know.
45
00:02:23,193 --> 00:02:25,978
Uh-huh. Um, Arthur,
I think I'd rather
46
00:02:26,046 --> 00:02:29,782
learn from someone who's
been successful at...
47
00:02:29,849 --> 00:02:30,783
Anything.
48
00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:33,702
Touché. It's true.
49
00:02:33,770 --> 00:02:36,171
I've never held a job very long,
50
00:02:36,239 --> 00:02:39,241
but I've landed myself
over 74 of them-
51
00:02:39,309 --> 00:02:40,576
one as a woman!
52
00:02:41,578 --> 00:02:43,479
Yeah, I'm gonna keep
looking for that book.
53
00:02:43,546 --> 00:02:45,914
Look, Spencer. All day long,
I sit in that basement
54
00:02:45,983 --> 00:02:48,317
doing the word jumbles
and praying for death.
55
00:02:48,385 --> 00:02:50,219
If I could help
someone else succeed,
56
00:02:50,287 --> 00:02:52,154
I'd be accomplishing something.
57
00:02:52,856 --> 00:02:55,741
Let me live through you, huh?
58
00:02:56,509 --> 00:02:59,327
I- all right, what do we do?
59
00:02:59,395 --> 00:03:01,097
Come downstairs.
60
00:03:01,248 --> 00:03:02,615
We'll play some trust games
61
00:03:02,683 --> 00:03:04,950
and take it from there.
62
00:03:05,018 --> 00:03:06,668
Come on-let's go, baby.
63
00:03:08,938 --> 00:03:11,239
I'm glad we did
something different.
64
00:03:11,307 --> 00:03:13,509
Nah, that's the last
magic show I go to.
65
00:03:13,576 --> 00:03:16,379
I don't need to pick a
card or see a bunny.
66
00:03:16,446 --> 00:03:17,646
Those metal hoops-
67
00:03:17,714 --> 00:03:19,081
they can keep 'em
together, take 'em apart-
68
00:03:19,148 --> 00:03:20,248
I- I-I don't care!
69
00:03:20,316 --> 00:03:22,385
Well, I thought he was amazing.
70
00:03:22,452 --> 00:03:23,836
Man, you're just upset
'cause he said he needed
71
00:03:23,904 --> 00:03:25,621
a bigger saw to cut you in half.
72
00:03:27,357 --> 00:03:29,925
If a magician needs
to be hurtful,
73
00:03:29,993 --> 00:03:31,227
he's not very good.
74
00:03:32,595 --> 00:03:33,896
All right, next weekend
we'll do something
75
00:03:33,964 --> 00:03:35,397
that's a little more your speed.
76
00:03:35,465 --> 00:03:37,600
Actually, we got
plans next weekend.
77
00:03:37,667 --> 00:03:39,602
No, we don't. Yeah, we do.
78
00:03:39,669 --> 00:03:40,802
All right, look, I
was gonna wait,
79
00:03:40,870 --> 00:03:42,338
but I've had something poking me
80
00:03:42,406 --> 00:03:43,772
in the pocket all night long.
81
00:03:46,859 --> 00:03:49,528
You think you're gonna keep
that going till next weekend?
82
00:03:50,396 --> 00:03:51,880
You know what these are?
83
00:03:51,948 --> 00:03:52,781
We got it?
84
00:03:52,849 --> 00:03:53,849
I just signed the papers today.
85
00:03:53,917 --> 00:03:54,883
Oh!
86
00:03:54,951 --> 00:03:56,769
Wha...? Wha-what's going on?
87
00:03:56,837 --> 00:03:58,203
We got a vacation home.
88
00:03:59,856 --> 00:04:00,923
What?
89
00:04:00,990 --> 00:04:02,091
Can you believe it?
90
00:04:02,158 --> 00:04:05,194
I cannot believe it!
91
00:04:05,262 --> 00:04:07,063
I forgot the saucers.
92
00:04:08,331 --> 00:04:09,231
So where is it?
93
00:04:09,299 --> 00:04:10,432
It's, like, 2 hours
outside of the city,
94
00:04:10,500 --> 00:04:11,851
right on this little lake.
95
00:04:11,918 --> 00:04:12,901
You guys are gonna love it.
96
00:04:12,969 --> 00:04:14,436
Oh, you know what?
Hey-let's celebrate
97
00:04:14,504 --> 00:04:16,137
with some cake!
98
00:04:16,205 --> 00:04:18,990
Oh, my God, I'm so happy.
This is fantastic.
99
00:04:19,058 --> 00:04:21,209
What's the matter?
100
00:04:21,277 --> 00:04:23,612
Don't tell me we're out of cake.
101
00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:24,747
No!
102
00:04:24,814 --> 00:04:25,748
Then what is it?
103
00:04:25,815 --> 00:04:27,883
What is it?
104
00:04:27,950 --> 00:04:30,452
How can you say, "what is it?"
105
00:04:32,188 --> 00:04:33,088
Whom is it?
106
00:04:34,657 --> 00:04:37,809
Doug, they bought
a vacation house.
107
00:04:37,877 --> 00:04:39,378
A vacation house!
108
00:04:39,446 --> 00:04:42,130
I get it. Ok, you're sad
109
00:04:42,198 --> 00:04:42,982
'cause your friends are happy.
110
00:04:43,133 --> 00:04:44,200
Come here, someone needs a hug!
111
00:04:44,267 --> 00:04:45,734
No. No! I understand.
112
00:04:45,802 --> 00:04:47,035
Listen to me, man.
113
00:04:47,103 --> 00:04:49,354
I mean, how come we can't
afford a vacation house?
114
00:04:49,422 --> 00:04:50,789
You make just as much
money as Deacon does
115
00:04:50,857 --> 00:04:52,324
and she doesn't work at all!
116
00:04:52,392 --> 00:04:54,676
Maybe their rich Uncle died.
117
00:04:54,744 --> 00:04:56,411
I didn't know they
have a rich Uncle.
118
00:04:56,479 --> 00:04:58,446
I don't think they do.
Oh, come on!
119
00:04:58,514 --> 00:05:01,450
Look, maybe they got
some sort of settlement.
120
00:05:01,517 --> 00:05:04,453
Oh, like from a
malpractice suit.
121
00:05:04,520 --> 00:05:06,621
A botched surgery maybe?
122
00:05:06,689 --> 00:05:08,641
Yes, yes.
123
00:05:11,428 --> 00:05:12,978
Oh, yeah, look at that.
124
00:05:13,045 --> 00:05:16,031
Kelly's boobs do not look right.
125
00:05:17,634 --> 00:05:19,701
Eh, her boobs are as
good as yours or mine.
126
00:05:22,172 --> 00:05:23,322
H- hey.
127
00:05:23,390 --> 00:05:24,457
How many people does
it take to cut a cake,
128
00:05:24,524 --> 00:05:26,191
am I right? We'll be
right in, all right.
129
00:05:26,259 --> 00:05:28,144
You just slap a
smile on your face
130
00:05:28,211 --> 00:05:30,312
and you pretend you like it when
good things happen to other people.
131
00:05:30,380 --> 00:05:31,546
All right? They're waiting.
132
00:05:31,614 --> 00:05:33,915
No, I can't. Just make
an excuse or something.
133
00:05:33,983 --> 00:05:35,334
I- I have to get into bed.
134
00:05:35,402 --> 00:05:37,135
Carrie. Look.
135
00:05:37,203 --> 00:05:39,505
They may have a vacation
home on a lake,
136
00:05:39,573 --> 00:05:41,073
but we got something
much better.
137
00:05:41,140 --> 00:05:42,174
What?
138
00:05:42,242 --> 00:05:44,577
We got this.
139
00:05:51,100 --> 00:05:54,170
All right. You done
with that résumé yet?
140
00:05:54,237 --> 00:05:55,571
I want to be at
the pool by 4:00.
141
00:05:55,639 --> 00:05:56,539
Yeah, here.
142
00:05:56,606 --> 00:05:58,307
Take a look.
143
00:05:58,375 --> 00:06:00,509
"Name-Spence Olchin."
144
00:06:00,577 --> 00:06:02,477
Not loving it.
145
00:06:02,545 --> 00:06:04,196
My name?
146
00:06:04,264 --> 00:06:06,382
What do you think
of "Clark gable"?
147
00:06:06,449 --> 00:06:08,183
I- what?
148
00:06:08,251 --> 00:06:11,053
"Clark gable" will
get you in doors.
149
00:06:11,121 --> 00:06:12,188
It's an icebreaker-
150
00:06:12,255 --> 00:06:15,557
"oh, my goodness! Your
name is Clark gable!
151
00:06:15,625 --> 00:06:17,526
You're hired!"
152
00:06:17,593 --> 00:06:20,579
I- I'm gonna stick
with Spence Olchin.
153
00:06:20,647 --> 00:06:22,197
It's your funeral.
154
00:06:22,265 --> 00:06:25,234
Now, what did you put
under special skills?
155
00:06:25,301 --> 00:06:28,270
Oh, um-"type 60
words a minute."
156
00:06:28,338 --> 00:06:31,507
Uh, "familiar with excel and
powerpoint computer programs."
157
00:06:31,575 --> 00:06:34,476
Uh, "speak Spanish and,
uh, certified c.P.R."
158
00:06:34,544 --> 00:06:35,710
Mm-hmm.
159
00:06:35,778 --> 00:06:39,748
And are you applying for a
job at a boredom factory?
160
00:06:39,815 --> 00:06:41,350
What am I supposed to do?
161
00:06:41,418 --> 00:06:44,019
Nothing. You're brutal on paper.
162
00:06:44,087 --> 00:06:46,788
All right, let's
move on to the...
163
00:06:46,856 --> 00:06:47,856
Mock interview.
164
00:06:47,924 --> 00:06:49,391
Ok. All right.
165
00:06:49,459 --> 00:06:51,626
All right, Mr. Olchin.
166
00:06:53,879 --> 00:06:55,947
Tell me why you
think you would be
167
00:06:56,015 --> 00:06:57,949
an asset to this company.
168
00:06:58,017 --> 00:07:02,270
Uh, well, during my tenure with the
metropolitan transit authority,
169
00:07:02,338 --> 00:07:04,005
I learned to deal with people,
170
00:07:04,073 --> 00:07:06,508
and I think that that's
given me the abili-
171
00:07:13,533 --> 00:07:14,800
what are you doing?
172
00:07:14,868 --> 00:07:17,536
Giving you a taste
of the real world.
173
00:07:19,305 --> 00:07:21,490
Now stop worrying about my hand
174
00:07:21,558 --> 00:07:24,025
and tell me where
you see yourself
175
00:07:24,093 --> 00:07:25,728
in 5 years.
176
00:07:25,795 --> 00:07:28,497
Well, in 5 year, I-oh, God...
177
00:07:33,419 --> 00:07:35,521
So, we're so looking
forward to having you guys
178
00:07:35,589 --> 00:07:36,789
come up to the
house on Saturday.
179
00:07:36,857 --> 00:07:38,691
I mean, the weather's
supposed to be great.
180
00:07:38,758 --> 00:07:40,275
I gotta be honest.
Unless the weather
181
00:07:40,343 --> 00:07:42,511
affects the cable reception,
182
00:07:42,579 --> 00:07:44,279
it's all the same to me.
183
00:07:44,347 --> 00:07:45,080
Nah, really, man,
184
00:07:45,231 --> 00:07:46,631
it's a whole different
world up there.
185
00:07:46,700 --> 00:07:48,433
And we found this
awesome restaurant.
186
00:07:48,501 --> 00:07:49,717
It's a converted barn.
187
00:07:49,785 --> 00:07:52,721
Mmm-don't you just love
it when you find things?
188
00:07:52,789 --> 00:07:54,689
Like, you ever just
walk down the street
189
00:07:54,758 --> 00:07:56,925
and find, like, a
big bag of money?
190
00:07:56,993 --> 00:07:58,143
Never happened to you?
191
00:07:59,312 --> 00:08:00,445
Does that ever happen to anyone?
192
00:08:00,513 --> 00:08:02,181
I don't know.
193
00:08:02,249 --> 00:08:03,632
Does it?
194
00:08:05,985 --> 00:08:08,703
So, uh, how's your
rich Uncle doing?
195
00:08:08,771 --> 00:08:10,973
I don't have a rich Uncle.
196
00:08:12,409 --> 00:08:14,276
Anymore...
197
00:08:15,378 --> 00:08:17,279
'Scuse me.
198
00:08:17,347 --> 00:08:19,214
Hello? Oh, hey, Denise.
199
00:08:19,282 --> 00:08:21,049
Is everything ok with the kids?
200
00:08:21,117 --> 00:08:22,768
Ok-oh...
201
00:08:22,835 --> 00:08:25,270
Listen, we'll be
home in 10 minutes.
202
00:08:25,337 --> 00:08:26,805
Major has another ear infection.
203
00:08:26,873 --> 00:08:28,324
Oh, no. Mm.
204
00:08:28,391 --> 00:08:29,458
Uh, you know, we
should get the check.
205
00:08:29,526 --> 00:08:31,159
Oh, no, no, no, we
got it, we got it.
206
00:08:31,227 --> 00:08:32,844
Get out of here-go.
Go, take care of it.
207
00:08:32,912 --> 00:08:33,645
Thanks, man. All right.
Thanks, guys.
208
00:08:33,713 --> 00:08:34,730
Later, guys.
209
00:08:34,798 --> 00:08:35,897
Jeez.
210
00:08:38,668 --> 00:08:40,869
Hope major's ok.
211
00:08:40,936 --> 00:08:42,103
Huh.
212
00:08:43,406 --> 00:08:44,606
What?
213
00:08:44,674 --> 00:08:46,274
You see what just happened here?
214
00:08:46,342 --> 00:08:47,976
We're picking up the check.
215
00:08:49,712 --> 00:08:51,013
I think that happens a lot.
216
00:08:51,080 --> 00:08:52,831
Carrie, their kid is sick.
217
00:08:52,899 --> 00:08:54,149
Was he?
218
00:08:54,217 --> 00:08:56,117
I mean, did we actually hear the
other end of the phone call?
219
00:08:56,185 --> 00:08:57,419
No, we did not.
220
00:08:57,486 --> 00:08:59,621
How do we know there's even
a "Denise, the babysitter"?
221
00:08:59,689 --> 00:09:01,857
I met her-she's hot.
222
00:09:04,427 --> 00:09:06,661
And it's not just about
paying for dinner.
223
00:09:06,729 --> 00:09:08,396
I mean, Kelly never
has her wallet.
224
00:09:08,464 --> 00:09:10,432
I'm always buying her
gum and magazines
225
00:09:10,499 --> 00:09:12,468
and she says, "I'll
catch you next time."
226
00:09:12,535 --> 00:09:15,136
Well, she ain't caught me yet.
227
00:09:15,204 --> 00:09:16,572
You know, you're right.
228
00:09:16,639 --> 00:09:19,174
You know, when Deacon and I
went to Jimmy's bachelor party,
229
00:09:19,242 --> 00:09:20,576
guess who laid out the
money for the stripper
230
00:09:20,643 --> 00:09:23,412
to do all the extra stuff-me.
231
00:09:24,614 --> 00:09:26,882
That's 'cause you're
a good guy, baby.
232
00:09:26,949 --> 00:09:30,952
Oh! And who watches their
kids all the time for free?
233
00:09:31,020 --> 00:09:32,654
That saves 'em a
crapload of money!
234
00:09:32,722 --> 00:09:34,790
Hell, yeah, Denise
is expensive...
235
00:09:34,857 --> 00:09:35,891
And hot.
236
00:09:35,958 --> 00:09:37,559
Ok, you mentioned that.
237
00:09:37,627 --> 00:09:38,710
I'm just saying-she's very hot.
238
00:09:38,778 --> 00:09:40,479
She should be, like, a
model or something.
239
00:09:41,881 --> 00:09:43,849
Hey, how tall do you have
to be, like, a model?
240
00:09:43,916 --> 00:09:44,767
'Cause she's, like, 5'9"-
241
00:09:44,834 --> 00:09:46,185
ok, stop with the Denise. Ok.
242
00:09:46,252 --> 00:09:49,355
Ok? Ooh-I have a big one.
243
00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:52,791
Who paid for the magic
show the other night?
244
00:09:52,859 --> 00:09:55,644
Oh-abracadabra, us!
245
00:09:55,712 --> 00:09:57,395
Exactly.
246
00:09:57,463 --> 00:09:58,781
Oh, wait a second. No, they said
247
00:09:58,848 --> 00:10:00,081
they were gonna pay
for dessert later.
248
00:10:00,149 --> 00:10:02,317
Oh, yeah, you're right.
249
00:10:02,385 --> 00:10:04,453
Except we never went for dessert
250
00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:08,190
because Kelly wanted to stop at
our house to use the bathroom.
251
00:10:08,258 --> 00:10:10,792
Yeah-oh, our house, where
the dessert is always free!
252
00:10:10,859 --> 00:10:13,261
Yeah! God, they're good!
253
00:10:13,329 --> 00:10:15,714
That's how they can afford
their fancy getaway,
254
00:10:15,782 --> 00:10:17,382
'cause we helped pay for it!
255
00:10:17,449 --> 00:10:19,350
Unbelievable...
256
00:10:19,418 --> 00:10:20,686
Here's your check,
257
00:10:20,753 --> 00:10:23,021
and your friend's doggy bag.
258
00:10:23,179 --> 00:10:25,080
Well, you know what? This
is coming home with me.
259
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:34,666
Huh?
260
00:10:34,734 --> 00:10:36,268
Huh, what do you think?
261
00:10:36,336 --> 00:10:38,054
Wow!
262
00:10:39,990 --> 00:10:41,490
Check out our view of the lake.
263
00:10:43,159 --> 00:10:45,094
Wow!
264
00:10:46,296 --> 00:10:48,013
Oh, just throw your
stuff on the bench.
265
00:10:48,080 --> 00:10:51,283
Wow!
266
00:10:51,351 --> 00:10:52,751
I'll take your bag upstairs.
267
00:10:54,187 --> 00:10:55,370
Just make yourself comfortable.
268
00:10:55,438 --> 00:10:57,039
Remember, our casa es su casa.
269
00:10:57,107 --> 00:10:59,341
Ok! Got that right.
270
00:11:01,044 --> 00:11:04,763
I tell you, I look
around here and I think,
271
00:11:04,831 --> 00:11:05,731
"this should be mine.
272
00:11:05,799 --> 00:11:08,300
"My fireplace, my
living room, my-
273
00:11:09,503 --> 00:11:12,070
ugly-ass pillow with ducks
wearing raincoats!"
274
00:11:13,473 --> 00:11:15,240
This all should be mine!
275
00:11:15,308 --> 00:11:16,525
Look at this. They got a canoe.
276
00:11:16,593 --> 00:11:19,461
I'll tell you one thing-
that's coming home with me.
277
00:11:19,529 --> 00:11:22,264
All right, what are you gonna
do with a canoe in Queens?
278
00:11:22,332 --> 00:11:25,951
What am I not gonna do
with a canoe in Queens?
279
00:11:26,018 --> 00:11:28,737
Doug, we can't stay
here this weekend.
280
00:11:28,805 --> 00:11:31,673
You can't ride tandem bikes
with people you hate.
281
00:11:31,741 --> 00:11:34,360
Well, I'll tell you something-I'm
gonna only pretend to pedal.
282
00:11:34,427 --> 00:11:37,379
Yeah. I wanna see them pull
this up Bear Mountain.
283
00:11:37,447 --> 00:11:38,296
Yeah!
284
00:11:38,448 --> 00:11:40,182
Yeah! Yeah!
285
00:11:40,250 --> 00:11:42,284
Wait a second, would you-
286
00:11:42,352 --> 00:11:43,468
listen to us.
287
00:11:43,536 --> 00:11:45,421
Come on, we can't be doing this.
288
00:11:45,489 --> 00:11:47,856
Doug, I'm sorry, but this whole
thing ruined our friendship.
289
00:11:47,924 --> 00:11:49,207
We gotta get on the
next bus home.
290
00:11:49,275 --> 00:11:51,777
Carrie, they're
our best friends!
291
00:11:51,845 --> 00:11:54,714
All right, look, there's gotta
be a way we can work this out.
292
00:11:55,915 --> 00:11:57,516
All right, how 'bout this?
293
00:11:57,584 --> 00:11:58,851
Starting now, no more
pickin' up checks,
294
00:11:58,918 --> 00:12:00,218
no more free babysitting,
295
00:12:00,286 --> 00:12:01,720
no more nothin'.
296
00:12:01,788 --> 00:12:02,905
Yeah.
297
00:12:02,973 --> 00:12:05,507
The gravy train stops here.
298
00:12:05,575 --> 00:12:08,810
And no jokes about the gravy
train always stopping here, ok?
299
00:12:10,379 --> 00:12:12,213
We're on the same team-
don't you ruin that.
300
00:12:18,087 --> 00:12:20,422
Hey, Arthur. Hey, Spencer!
301
00:12:20,490 --> 00:12:23,859
Today we'll go over the dos and
don'ts of interview dress.
302
00:12:23,927 --> 00:12:25,727
That is a "don't."
303
00:12:25,795 --> 00:12:28,730
Look, Arthur, I tracked
down a really good job.
304
00:12:28,799 --> 00:12:30,232
It's in a publishing company.
305
00:12:30,300 --> 00:12:31,233
Really?
306
00:12:31,251 --> 00:12:32,401
Yeah. Check this out.
307
00:12:32,468 --> 00:12:33,468
"Generous starting pay,
308
00:12:33,536 --> 00:12:35,671
"benefits, creative environment,
309
00:12:35,738 --> 00:12:37,506
no experience necessary."
310
00:12:37,573 --> 00:12:39,257
I interview there
Monday morning!
311
00:12:39,325 --> 00:12:41,527
That's wonderful, my boy.
312
00:12:41,595 --> 00:12:43,061
You're going to get that job,
313
00:12:43,129 --> 00:12:46,131
and your victory
will be my victory.
314
00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:48,450
Arthur, I-
315
00:12:48,518 --> 00:12:50,052
I really wanna thank you
for helping me out.
316
00:12:50,119 --> 00:12:51,287
I mean-I mean,
317
00:12:51,354 --> 00:12:54,690
your methods were a little...
invasive,
318
00:12:54,757 --> 00:12:59,461
but, um, I really think they
gave me the confidence I needed.
319
00:12:59,529 --> 00:13:01,597
Think nothing of it.
You know what?
320
00:13:01,664 --> 00:13:03,431
I have a dickey you can borrow.
321
00:13:03,500 --> 00:13:04,867
It's downstairs in my bureau.
322
00:13:04,934 --> 00:13:06,352
Uh, you know what,
I'm just gonna-
323
00:13:06,419 --> 00:13:07,703
I'll febreze it and
you'll wear it!
324
00:13:11,174 --> 00:13:12,774
Thanks, Arthur.
325
00:13:17,664 --> 00:13:21,033
Um, Arthur, why is
your hand down there?
326
00:13:21,101 --> 00:13:23,035
Are you still prepping
me for the interview?
327
00:13:24,504 --> 00:13:25,954
Sure.
328
00:13:36,666 --> 00:13:37,699
Hey, where's Doug and Carrie?
329
00:13:37,767 --> 00:13:38,968
The reservation's at 8:00.
330
00:13:39,035 --> 00:13:40,769
Oh, they're coming. Mm.
331
00:13:42,239 --> 00:13:44,123
Wow, it's been nice having
them up here with us, huh?
332
00:13:44,191 --> 00:13:45,507
Yeah, they're really great.
333
00:13:46,927 --> 00:13:48,794
If you like cheap white people.
334
00:13:49,763 --> 00:13:51,580
I know. What is with them?
335
00:13:51,647 --> 00:13:52,764
I mean, we let 'em
stay at our house
336
00:13:52,832 --> 00:13:53,832
and we pay for everything.
337
00:13:53,900 --> 00:13:55,200
The lunch, the jet skis.
338
00:13:55,267 --> 00:13:56,468
Well, they better pay
for dinner tonight.
339
00:13:56,536 --> 00:13:58,253
Oh... they will.
340
00:14:05,261 --> 00:14:07,162
Ok, all right, I got one for you.
Ok.
341
00:14:07,230 --> 00:14:07,880
Titanic.
342
00:14:07,948 --> 00:14:10,365
Bill Paxton or bill Pullman?
343
00:14:10,433 --> 00:14:11,583
Bill Paxton.
344
00:14:11,651 --> 00:14:12,951
All right. All right.
345
00:14:13,019 --> 00:14:15,387
While you were sleeping-
Paxton or Pullman?
346
00:14:15,454 --> 00:14:16,488
Please, that is pure Pullman.
347
00:14:16,556 --> 00:14:17,789
Come on, I'm not even
breaking a sweat here.
348
00:14:17,858 --> 00:14:18,958
All right, all right,
I got one for you.
349
00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:20,659
Casper, the friendly ghost.
350
00:14:20,727 --> 00:14:22,261
Unh. Paxton or Pullman?
351
00:14:22,329 --> 00:14:24,496
I was just watching this-uh...
352
00:14:25,866 --> 00:14:26,866
I wanna say Paxton.
353
00:14:27,968 --> 00:14:29,068
No? No? Wrong-drink!
354
00:14:29,135 --> 00:14:30,402
Drink. Oh, man.
355
00:14:30,469 --> 00:14:33,338
Here's your check.
356
00:14:39,796 --> 00:14:40,862
Dinner.
357
00:14:43,049 --> 00:14:45,784
Dinner be done.
358
00:14:45,852 --> 00:14:48,020
That it be.
359
00:14:49,472 --> 00:14:50,638
Thanks, you guys.
This was great.
360
00:14:50,706 --> 00:14:52,107
Oh, no...
361
00:14:52,174 --> 00:14:53,842
Thank you.
362
00:14:55,395 --> 00:14:57,596
So the mets are looking
good this year, right?
363
00:15:00,767 --> 00:15:02,334
Yeah, they are, they are.
364
00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:04,869
They-they can always use
another starter, but, uh...
365
00:15:04,937 --> 00:15:06,922
I likes what I see.
366
00:15:11,377 --> 00:15:13,561
Oh, Kelly, there's
a fly right there.
367
00:15:13,629 --> 00:15:16,031
Oh, sorry-missed it.
368
00:15:17,083 --> 00:15:20,302
God, is it me, or is it a
million degrees in here?
369
00:15:21,821 --> 00:15:23,405
It's just you.
370
00:15:28,978 --> 00:15:30,212
Wow, you know, look at the time.
371
00:15:30,280 --> 00:15:31,563
We should probably take off.
372
00:15:31,631 --> 00:15:32,947
Oh, God!
373
00:15:33,015 --> 00:15:34,650
Doug! Oh, my God!
374
00:15:34,717 --> 00:15:35,817
Are you hurt?
375
00:15:35,885 --> 00:15:37,419
I just stabbed my foot
with a butter knife.
376
00:15:37,487 --> 00:15:39,221
I'm very much hurt, yes.
377
00:15:39,289 --> 00:15:40,388
We gotta go take care of this.
378
00:15:40,456 --> 00:15:41,890
We got to-sorry.
379
00:15:41,958 --> 00:15:43,192
Never a dull moment
with this one, right?
380
00:15:43,259 --> 00:15:44,492
We'll see you back at the house.
381
00:15:49,315 --> 00:15:50,398
Nicely done.
382
00:15:50,466 --> 00:15:53,001
Oh, yeah. I play to win.
383
00:15:53,069 --> 00:15:54,002
Now let's go-
384
00:15:54,070 --> 00:15:55,337
my shoe's filling with blood.
385
00:16:02,162 --> 00:16:05,664
Hi, I'm Spence Olchin. I have a 10 A.M.
with Bob Stillman.
386
00:16:05,732 --> 00:16:07,916
Just have a seat. He'll
be with you in a moment.
387
00:16:11,805 --> 00:16:14,806
Well, it was a real pleasure
meeting you, Mr. gable.
388
00:16:14,874 --> 00:16:16,475
Call me Clark.
389
00:16:16,542 --> 00:16:17,959
Let's make this happen.
390
00:16:19,528 --> 00:16:21,112
Arthur, what are you doing here?
391
00:16:21,180 --> 00:16:22,581
Nailing an interview.
392
00:16:22,649 --> 00:16:24,933
You applied for the
job I told you about?
393
00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:26,734
You snooze, you lose.
394
00:16:26,802 --> 00:16:28,787
No, I didn't snooze.
I got here early.
395
00:16:28,855 --> 00:16:30,505
I'm sorry, Spence,
but don't you see?
396
00:16:30,573 --> 00:16:32,107
This is my last
chance for success.
397
00:16:32,174 --> 00:16:34,242
No, you-you said if
I was successful,
398
00:16:34,310 --> 00:16:35,443
you were gonna live through me.
399
00:16:35,511 --> 00:16:36,712
Change of plans.
400
00:16:36,780 --> 00:16:38,680
You're gonna live through me.
401
00:16:38,748 --> 00:16:39,748
Mr. Olchin?
402
00:16:40,683 --> 00:16:42,134
Mr. Stillman will see you now.
403
00:16:42,202 --> 00:16:43,568
Ok. You know what, Arthur?
404
00:16:43,636 --> 00:16:44,786
I'm gonna go in there,
405
00:16:44,853 --> 00:16:45,687
I'm gonna dazzle them,
406
00:16:45,754 --> 00:16:46,988
and I'm gonna get this job.
407
00:16:47,056 --> 00:16:48,856
And you'll have done all
of this for nothing.
408
00:16:48,924 --> 00:16:51,727
Don't count it-I bad-mouthed
you pretty good. Mm-hmm.
409
00:16:59,502 --> 00:17:01,086
Ok, we're ready.
410
00:17:01,154 --> 00:17:02,337
Ok, good.
411
00:17:02,405 --> 00:17:04,189
Hey, honey, we've
got, like, no gas.
412
00:17:04,257 --> 00:17:06,157
Oh, ok.
413
00:17:06,225 --> 00:17:08,476
You guys continue packing.
I'll go fill the car up.
414
00:17:10,397 --> 00:17:12,831
That-that'd be great. Thanks.
415
00:17:13,716 --> 00:17:16,468
So you got, like, a
texaco card or...?
416
00:17:17,737 --> 00:17:20,138
Sorry, I already
packed my wallet.
417
00:17:20,206 --> 00:17:22,457
Oh, really, which bag? Doug will get it.
Doug, get it.
418
00:17:22,524 --> 00:17:24,426
Ok.
419
00:17:24,494 --> 00:17:25,594
That's ok.
420
00:17:25,662 --> 00:17:27,195
I think it's good where it is.
421
00:17:27,263 --> 00:17:28,914
It's just that we paid for gas
422
00:17:28,981 --> 00:17:29,848
on the way up here,
423
00:17:29,916 --> 00:17:31,382
and it's not cheap.
424
00:17:31,450 --> 00:17:32,968
Well, I know what is cheap.
425
00:17:33,035 --> 00:17:34,086
I know what is cheap, too.
426
00:17:34,153 --> 00:17:34,786
I don't think you do
know what is cheap.
427
00:17:35,105 --> 00:17:36,772
I do know what's cheap!
428
00:17:36,840 --> 00:17:38,173
Yeah, really? What's cheap?
You guys!
429
00:17:38,208 --> 00:17:39,441
What?! Yeah, that's right.
430
00:17:39,592 --> 00:17:40,926
We are?
431
00:17:40,993 --> 00:17:42,161
Brother, you stabbed
your own damn foot
432
00:17:42,228 --> 00:17:43,429
to get out of paying the check.
433
00:17:43,496 --> 00:17:44,996
Yeah, that's because
that's the only way
434
00:17:45,065 --> 00:17:46,765
we can get out of
picking up a check.
435
00:17:46,832 --> 00:17:47,833
What are you talking about?
436
00:17:47,900 --> 00:17:49,567
We paid for everything
all weekend.
437
00:17:49,635 --> 00:17:52,537
We have been carrying
you guys for years.
438
00:17:52,605 --> 00:17:53,772
What?!
439
00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:56,124
Gum and strippers
ain't free, buddy.
440
00:17:56,192 --> 00:17:59,661
Yeah. And don't even get us
started on holiday gifts.
441
00:17:59,729 --> 00:18:03,082
Yeah, is it Christmas or kwanzaa?
Pick one!
442
00:18:03,149 --> 00:18:04,099
I can't believe
what I'm hearing.
443
00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:05,283
Guy, how much money
do I spend on you
444
00:18:05,351 --> 00:18:06,518
at lunch every day?
445
00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:08,420
Look-hey, we always
split the bill in half.
446
00:18:08,488 --> 00:18:10,188
We don't split the food in half.
447
00:18:10,256 --> 00:18:11,957
All right, ok, listen.
448
00:18:12,024 --> 00:18:13,959
If you haven't been
sponging off us for years
449
00:18:14,026 --> 00:18:15,627
and you don't have
a dead rich Uncle,
450
00:18:15,695 --> 00:18:16,962
then how do you explain
451
00:18:17,029 --> 00:18:18,897
that you guys can afford
this place and we can't?
452
00:18:20,366 --> 00:18:22,233
Not that it's any
of your business,
453
00:18:22,301 --> 00:18:23,769
but we have been
saving for this place
454
00:18:23,836 --> 00:18:24,770
for a very long time.
455
00:18:24,837 --> 00:18:26,170
We've been taking
part of my paycheck
456
00:18:26,238 --> 00:18:27,572
every week and putting it aside.
457
00:18:27,640 --> 00:18:30,675
Look, we've cut back on
takeout, gifts for each other.
458
00:18:30,743 --> 00:18:32,110
We really sacrificed.
459
00:18:33,846 --> 00:18:35,214
Well, I don't need
your whole life story.
460
00:18:38,351 --> 00:18:41,353
And anyway, we can
save if we wanted to.
461
00:18:42,472 --> 00:18:44,573
Then... Why didn't we?
462
00:18:46,609 --> 00:18:48,627
Why didn't we?
463
00:18:48,694 --> 00:18:50,796
You're asking me,
"why didn't we?"
464
00:18:50,863 --> 00:18:52,714
Are you saying it's my fault?
465
00:18:52,782 --> 00:18:54,432
Uh, excuse me, but
I'm not the one
466
00:18:54,500 --> 00:18:57,302
who invests my paycheck in
white castle every night.
467
00:18:59,538 --> 00:19:01,622
Hey, first of all, I almost
always have a coupon,
468
00:19:01,690 --> 00:19:03,041
which is more than you
can say when you go buy
469
00:19:03,109 --> 00:19:05,443
your fancy halston dresses!
470
00:19:05,511 --> 00:19:08,446
Ok, I don't have any
halston dresses, idiot.
471
00:19:08,514 --> 00:19:10,565
It's not 1979.
472
00:19:12,335 --> 00:19:13,468
I'm gonna be in the car!
473
00:19:13,536 --> 00:19:16,738
Wait, I saw you packing
some pretty fancy clothes
474
00:19:16,805 --> 00:19:18,440
with some fruity labels,
and that spells cash!
475
00:19:18,507 --> 00:19:20,908
Yeah, you don't even
know how to spell cash!
476
00:19:22,645 --> 00:19:26,014
So we ever gonna tell them
about the, uh, bad boob job?
477
00:19:26,082 --> 00:19:28,800
Uh, hell no! We take
that to the grave!
478
00:19:31,770 --> 00:19:34,039
I mean... they're looking
a lot better, right?
479
00:19:34,107 --> 00:19:35,707
Oh, yeah.
480
00:19:52,892 --> 00:19:54,059
Mr. gable.
481
00:19:54,127 --> 00:19:55,861
We checked your résumé.
482
00:19:55,928 --> 00:19:58,429
None of your references
have ever heard of you,
483
00:19:58,497 --> 00:20:00,398
and that social security
number you gave us
484
00:20:00,466 --> 00:20:02,400
is the gamblers
anonymous hotline.
485
00:20:03,770 --> 00:20:05,303
We're gonna have to
ask you to leave.
486
00:20:05,371 --> 00:20:06,621
All right, then.
487
00:20:20,169 --> 00:20:24,639
So tell me about your
new job, big guy.
488
00:20:26,926 --> 00:20:28,861
Nice try, spanky.
489
00:20:28,928 --> 00:20:30,528
I already got fired.
34173
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