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1
00:00:41,124 --> 00:00:42,474
Ooh!
2
00:00:42,475 --> 00:00:44,844
Is Douglas back from the
store with my eyedrops?
3
00:00:44,845 --> 00:00:45,678
No, not yet.
4
00:00:45,679 --> 00:00:47,680
If I don't have my eyedrops,
5
00:00:47,681 --> 00:00:49,447
I can't put my lenses in.
6
00:00:49,448 --> 00:00:51,467
I'm blind as a $2 hooker!
7
00:00:51,468 --> 00:00:54,386
Didn't know $2 hookers
tended to be blind.
8
00:00:54,387 --> 00:00:57,139
Why do you think
they're only $2?
9
00:00:57,140 --> 00:00:59,442
Dad, could we just get
you glasses already?
10
00:00:59,443 --> 00:01:01,227
I swore off glasses in 1976!
11
00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:02,661
I know the year,
12
00:01:02,662 --> 00:01:05,097
because the last time I threw
a pair at the television
13
00:01:05,098 --> 00:01:08,166
was during a particularly
offensive bicentennial minute!
14
00:01:11,170 --> 00:01:12,254
Say hello to your hero.
15
00:01:12,255 --> 00:01:13,255
What?
16
00:01:13,256 --> 00:01:15,324
We needed toothpaste, right?
17
00:01:15,325 --> 00:01:17,475
Well, it was on sale for $1.09.
18
00:01:17,476 --> 00:01:20,129
Trouble is, it was only
one to a customer.
19
00:01:20,130 --> 00:01:22,147
So how did I get 5, you ask?
20
00:01:22,148 --> 00:01:24,416
Well, Doug bought one.
21
00:01:24,417 --> 00:01:26,552
Then 10 minutes later,
22
00:01:26,553 --> 00:01:29,922
British Doug bought
a jolly good one.
23
00:01:29,923 --> 00:01:31,356
Then...
24
00:01:31,357 --> 00:01:32,875
Did you get my
father's eyedrops?
25
00:01:32,876 --> 00:01:34,927
Excuse me. I was about
to introduce you
26
00:01:34,928 --> 00:01:36,595
to Clumsy Shop-Teacher Doug.
27
00:01:41,434 --> 00:01:44,502
So the one thing I asked you
to get, you didn't get.
28
00:01:44,503 --> 00:01:45,954
No, but 5 tubes of toothpaste!
29
00:01:45,955 --> 00:01:47,656
We'll never need
toothpaste again!
30
00:01:47,657 --> 00:01:49,658
We win!
31
00:01:49,659 --> 00:01:52,294
Listen, I talked
to the bank today,
32
00:01:52,295 --> 00:01:55,731
and I think we should
refinance our mortgage.
33
00:01:55,732 --> 00:01:58,116
Carrie, we were lucky to
finance in the first place.
34
00:01:58,117 --> 00:02:01,454
Let's not tinker with
the support beams.
35
00:02:01,455 --> 00:02:03,672
Look, a couple of
hours of paperwork,
36
00:02:03,673 --> 00:02:07,108
and we save thousands of dollars
over the next 30 years.
37
00:02:07,109 --> 00:02:10,695
I gotta tell you, my vote's
still leanin' towards no.
38
00:02:10,696 --> 00:02:12,998
Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot
to tell you this.
39
00:02:12,999 --> 00:02:14,833
You don't have a vote.
40
00:02:21,707 --> 00:02:23,742
We have to refinance.
41
00:02:23,743 --> 00:02:26,846
Any money we save, she'll
just stick in the bank
42
00:02:26,847 --> 00:02:29,849
or use to pay bills.
43
00:02:29,850 --> 00:02:31,984
So stupid.
44
00:02:33,620 --> 00:02:36,905
Heffernan.
45
00:02:36,906 --> 00:02:37,856
Uh, yeah, Mr. O'Boyle.
46
00:02:37,857 --> 00:02:39,441
Kinda slow goin' there, huh?
47
00:02:39,442 --> 00:02:41,126
How 'bout a little
less Burger King
48
00:02:41,127 --> 00:02:43,145
and a little more deliveries?
49
00:02:43,146 --> 00:02:45,764
Uh, I didn't stop at
Burger King today, sir.
50
00:02:45,765 --> 00:02:48,066
Then Arby's.
51
00:02:49,068 --> 00:02:50,735
Okay.
52
00:02:50,736 --> 00:02:53,705
Listen, you got a pickup
at Jewel and Kissena.
53
00:02:53,706 --> 00:02:54,873
The high school?
54
00:02:54,874 --> 00:02:56,491
Yeah.
55
00:02:56,492 --> 00:02:58,643
You kiddin' me? I
graduated from there.
56
00:02:58,644 --> 00:03:00,112
That's funny.
57
00:03:00,113 --> 00:03:01,814
Yeah, my sides are splitting.
58
00:03:01,815 --> 00:03:04,883
Let me get off so I
can tell the guys.
59
00:03:16,112 --> 00:03:17,980
Hey, coach, any
chance you could use
60
00:03:17,981 --> 00:03:19,982
a slightly
out-of-shape fullback?
61
00:03:23,370 --> 00:03:25,371
Heffernan.
62
00:03:26,839 --> 00:03:28,507
How are ya?
63
00:03:28,508 --> 00:03:29,241
Ah, great.
64
00:03:29,242 --> 00:03:31,693
Pull up a chair.
Let's catch up, huh?
65
00:03:31,694 --> 00:03:32,828
All right.
66
00:03:32,829 --> 00:03:34,797
Okay...
67
00:03:35,198 --> 00:03:36,682
Married? Yep.
68
00:03:36,683 --> 00:03:37,967
Kids? No.
69
00:03:37,968 --> 00:03:40,168
We're all caught up.
70
00:03:40,169 --> 00:03:43,255
Hey, I'm thinking of going to Mr.
Nagel's biology class
71
00:03:43,256 --> 00:03:44,923
and settin' all the
frogs free again.
72
00:03:44,924 --> 00:03:46,842
He can't suspend me now, right?
73
00:03:46,843 --> 00:03:48,227
No.
74
00:03:48,228 --> 00:03:50,462
He's dead.
75
00:03:51,998 --> 00:03:54,349
Oh, my God. I'm so sorry-
76
00:03:54,350 --> 00:03:56,568
No, that's all right...
seven years ago.
77
00:03:56,569 --> 00:03:59,071
I'm all cried out.
78
00:03:59,072 --> 00:04:00,789
I cannot believe you said-
79
00:04:00,790 --> 00:04:03,141
Hey, Brandon, Michael! Come
here, come here, come here.
80
00:04:03,142 --> 00:04:06,411
I want ya to meet a real...
81
00:04:06,412 --> 00:04:07,979
running back.
82
00:04:07,980 --> 00:04:10,215
Doug Heffernan.
83
00:04:10,216 --> 00:04:13,035
All-county, two years in a row.
84
00:04:13,036 --> 00:04:14,336
Hey, nice to meet ya.
85
00:04:14,337 --> 00:04:15,337
How you doin'?
86
00:04:15,338 --> 00:04:16,972
Yeah, all-county. Wow.
87
00:04:16,973 --> 00:04:19,157
Uh, wanna tell 'em about
the Kennedy game?
88
00:04:19,158 --> 00:04:21,627
Come on. They don't wanna
hear the old war stories.
89
00:04:21,628 --> 00:04:24,229
Go ahead and tell them. Okay.
90
00:04:24,230 --> 00:04:26,831
We hitched our wagon
to this animal.
91
00:04:26,832 --> 00:04:30,436
186 yards.
92
00:04:30,437 --> 00:04:31,519
You're embarrassing me.
93
00:04:31,520 --> 00:04:32,587
No, no, no.
94
00:04:32,588 --> 00:04:34,656
He ran like he was
mad at the grass.
95
00:04:42,382 --> 00:04:44,533
Hey, Arthur.
96
00:04:44,534 --> 00:04:47,001
Have you ever seen this Mr.
Magoo program?
97
00:04:47,002 --> 00:04:49,204
It's quite insensitive.
98
00:04:49,205 --> 00:04:52,091
Oh, 'cause of that really
racist Asian character?
99
00:04:52,092 --> 00:04:53,325
Oh, no. He's hilarious.
100
00:04:53,326 --> 00:04:55,994
They should give that
guy his own show.
101
00:04:55,995 --> 00:04:58,146
See, I don't see him as a lead.
102
00:04:58,147 --> 00:04:59,631
You couldn't be more wrong.
103
00:04:59,632 --> 00:05:03,134
My point is, the blind are
treated as if we're buffoons.
104
00:05:03,135 --> 00:05:04,235
You're not blind.
105
00:05:04,236 --> 00:05:06,204
Why don't you just
go get glasses?
106
00:05:06,205 --> 00:05:09,441
I think you'd look
really handsome in them.
107
00:05:09,442 --> 00:05:11,944
That's the nicest thing
you ever said to me.
108
00:05:11,945 --> 00:05:13,878
Wait a second.
109
00:05:13,879 --> 00:05:15,280
You're not Carrie!
110
00:05:16,448 --> 00:05:18,583
N- no, it's me, Holly.
111
00:05:18,584 --> 00:05:22,321
I'm sorry. I can usually
recognize your gin-soaked voice.
112
00:05:24,040 --> 00:05:26,191
I must need my eardrops.
113
00:05:26,192 --> 00:05:27,959
Listen, Arthur, if
you're not feeling well,
114
00:05:27,960 --> 00:05:29,528
we don't have to go
on our walk today.
115
00:05:32,465 --> 00:05:34,166
Wait, Arthur, no. These
aren't eardrops!
116
00:05:34,167 --> 00:05:35,767
This is wart remover.
117
00:05:35,768 --> 00:05:37,252
It says for external use only!
118
00:05:37,253 --> 00:05:39,054
Oh, my God.
119
00:05:39,055 --> 00:05:40,889
Are you okay?
120
00:05:40,890 --> 00:05:43,625
Arthur! Arthur, can you hear me?
121
00:05:46,362 --> 00:05:48,397
So then I cut to my left, right?
122
00:05:48,398 --> 00:05:50,515
And the cornerback comes in
to try to get me, right?
123
00:05:50,516 --> 00:05:52,217
So I say, "I'm gonna
cut to the right,"
124
00:05:52,218 --> 00:05:53,718
But no, I go right through him
125
00:05:53,719 --> 00:05:55,254
and just crack his chest plate!
126
00:05:55,255 --> 00:05:57,722
I put like a cleat in the
eye, I'm going crazy!
127
00:05:57,723 --> 00:05:59,074
His eye's twitchin',
128
00:05:59,075 --> 00:06:02,027
and his soul is literally
spillin' all over the field.
129
00:06:02,028 --> 00:06:03,896
Then I just truck it
into the end zone.
130
00:06:03,897 --> 00:06:05,897
Touchdown. Playoffs.
131
00:06:05,898 --> 00:06:06,965
Something like that.
132
00:06:06,966 --> 00:06:09,468
I don't remember. It
was a long time ago.
133
00:06:09,469 --> 00:06:10,869
Awesome!
134
00:06:10,870 --> 00:06:13,872
Yeah. We haven't made the
playoffs since, what, '94?
135
00:06:13,873 --> 00:06:15,574
Hey, hey.
136
00:06:17,243 --> 00:06:19,944
I need this job.
137
00:06:21,914 --> 00:06:24,299
You got time to tell 'em
about the Bayside game?
138
00:06:24,300 --> 00:06:26,167
Heffernan, where are you?
139
00:06:26,168 --> 00:06:27,819
We got an emergency
plasma pickup
140
00:06:27,820 --> 00:06:30,222
at Queens General Hospital.
141
00:06:30,223 --> 00:06:32,457
I got time.
142
00:06:39,699 --> 00:06:42,317
Car, you're never gonna believe
where I had a pickup today.
143
00:06:42,318 --> 00:06:44,987
One second, honey. I'm on the
phone with the mortgage company.
144
00:06:44,988 --> 00:06:47,756
Yes, once again, the
name is Heffernan.
145
00:06:47,757 --> 00:06:50,525
They told me to talk to you
about looking into a rate?
146
00:06:50,526 --> 00:06:53,561
No, no, no, no. Customer
Service sent me to you.
147
00:06:53,562 --> 00:06:56,198
Please don't send me back
there- Hello? Great.
148
00:06:56,199 --> 00:06:58,901
Here comes American Pie again.
149
00:06:58,902 --> 00:07:00,635
My old high school.
It was unbelievable.
150
00:07:00,636 --> 00:07:02,470
My old coach calls me
in the office, right?
151
00:07:02,471 --> 00:07:03,638
We're hanging out there.
152
00:07:03,639 --> 00:07:04,739
Then he brings students in
153
00:07:04,740 --> 00:07:06,208
so we can tell
them some stories-
154
00:07:06,209 --> 00:07:08,594
And then - Yes, Marcus.
Yes, it's me again.
155
00:07:08,595 --> 00:07:10,228
Honey, please. Yes...
156
00:07:10,229 --> 00:07:11,830
Yes, the yeller. Uh-huh.
157
00:07:11,831 --> 00:07:14,499
Listen, you and Melissa and me,
158
00:07:14,500 --> 00:07:17,201
we all need to get on
the same page, okay?
159
00:07:17,202 --> 00:07:19,738
Because she said I
needed to talk to you.
160
00:07:19,739 --> 00:07:22,357
No, no, no. Don't put
me on hold again, plea-
161
00:07:22,358 --> 00:07:24,159
I'm on hold.
162
00:07:24,160 --> 00:07:25,426
So I'm telling the story, right,
163
00:07:25,427 --> 00:07:27,261
and these kids are
literally looking at me
164
00:07:27,262 --> 00:07:28,930
like I'm one of the
guys from Menudo.
165
00:07:28,931 --> 00:07:30,949
And all of a sudden-
166
00:07:30,950 --> 00:07:33,284
I- I- I- Listen,
listen, baby, please!
167
00:07:33,285 --> 00:07:34,953
God, I gotta focus
on this right now.
168
00:07:34,954 --> 00:07:35,954
Do me a favor.
169
00:07:35,955 --> 00:07:37,656
The upstairs toilet
is acting up again.
170
00:07:37,657 --> 00:07:38,841
Please take a look at it.
171
00:07:38,842 --> 00:07:40,175
Yes!
172
00:07:48,718 --> 00:07:51,136
Treat her right, and
she'll treat you right.
173
00:07:51,137 --> 00:07:53,255
Doug Heffernan, class of '83.
174
00:07:58,911 --> 00:08:01,263
This is broccoli! What?
175
00:08:01,264 --> 00:08:03,115
Broccoli!
176
00:08:03,116 --> 00:08:05,633
Okay. Ready for broccoli.
177
00:08:08,471 --> 00:08:10,688
Yam!
178
00:08:10,689 --> 00:08:12,691
Okay. Ready for ham.
179
00:08:12,692 --> 00:08:14,876
No, I said yam.
180
00:08:14,877 --> 00:08:16,361
Yes.
181
00:08:21,550 --> 00:08:24,136
What's the date on this ham?
182
00:08:30,510 --> 00:08:31,343
What's up?
183
00:08:39,018 --> 00:08:40,902
Hey, we got any SunnyD?
184
00:08:43,523 --> 00:08:46,291
Doug... where have you been?
185
00:08:46,292 --> 00:08:47,959
What are you talking about?
186
00:08:47,960 --> 00:08:51,530
You were supposed to meet
me at the mortgage company.
187
00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:54,633
Oh, uh...
188
00:08:54,634 --> 00:08:56,250
I'm sorry. I forgot.
189
00:08:56,251 --> 00:08:57,419
You forgot. Where were you?
190
00:08:57,420 --> 00:08:59,687
School.
191
00:08:59,688 --> 00:09:02,857
You went back to your
old high school? Why?
192
00:09:02,858 --> 00:09:05,043
We have a very big
game coming up.
193
00:09:05,044 --> 00:09:08,362
Okay, I don't know what it
is you're talking about,
194
00:09:08,363 --> 00:09:10,031
but I rescheduled
the appointment
195
00:09:10,032 --> 00:09:11,733
for tomorrow at 5:00.
196
00:09:11,734 --> 00:09:15,604
Uh, yeah. 5's not
gonna work for me.
197
00:09:17,239 --> 00:09:18,506
And why is that?
198
00:09:18,507 --> 00:09:20,392
Pep rally. Pep rally.
199
00:09:21,811 --> 00:09:23,811
Okay, you do realize
we're seconds away
200
00:09:23,812 --> 00:09:25,981
from squad cars being
on our lawn, right?
201
00:09:25,982 --> 00:09:27,982
Carrie, so... I like hanging
out there sometimes.
202
00:09:27,983 --> 00:09:29,785
What's the big deal?
What's the big deal?
203
00:09:29,786 --> 00:09:31,737
First of all, you
missed an appointment,
204
00:09:31,738 --> 00:09:33,655
and it is a little
weird that a grown man
205
00:09:33,656 --> 00:09:35,423
is hanging out at his
old high school.
206
00:09:35,424 --> 00:09:37,876
And why the hell are you
wearing a backpack?
207
00:09:37,877 --> 00:09:40,879
That's exactly why I go hang
out at my old high school,
208
00:09:40,880 --> 00:09:43,248
Okay, 'cause I go there, I'm somebody.
I get respect.
209
00:09:43,249 --> 00:09:45,567
I walk in here, all I get
is you yelling at me
210
00:09:45,568 --> 00:09:48,337
and Ray Charles bouncing
off the furniture.
211
00:09:48,338 --> 00:09:50,539
How 'bout this? When you get
home from work tomorrow
212
00:09:50,540 --> 00:09:53,141
and you take your pants off
and fall asleep on the couch,
213
00:09:53,142 --> 00:09:54,126
I throw ya a parade, huh?
214
00:09:54,127 --> 00:09:56,428
All I'm saying is,
high school was great.
215
00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:59,064
And I miss having that
feeling, that's all.
216
00:09:59,065 --> 00:10:00,882
You can understand that, right?
217
00:10:00,883 --> 00:10:03,301
No, I can't understand it
because high school sucked.
218
00:10:03,302 --> 00:10:05,520
What are you talking about?
219
00:10:05,521 --> 00:10:07,588
All the obnoxious cliques,
the cheerleaders-
220
00:10:07,589 --> 00:10:10,642
"Excuse me, that's our table. "
221
00:10:10,643 --> 00:10:13,645
The only thing I enjoyed was
smoking in the girls' room.
222
00:10:14,430 --> 00:10:15,947
Ohhh. Oh, my God!
223
00:10:15,948 --> 00:10:17,415
I- I get it!
224
00:10:17,416 --> 00:10:18,816
Oh, my God, you're-
225
00:10:18,817 --> 00:10:21,086
You're jealous 'cause I
rocked in high school
226
00:10:21,087 --> 00:10:23,121
and you didn't!
227
00:10:23,122 --> 00:10:26,424
I'm Emilio Estevez, and
you're Ally Sheedy!
228
00:10:28,294 --> 00:10:30,028
What does that mean?
229
00:10:30,029 --> 00:10:31,129
Breakfast Club?
230
00:10:32,531 --> 00:10:33,581
Never saw it.
231
00:10:33,582 --> 00:10:35,083
You-
232
00:10:36,919 --> 00:10:39,337
You what?!
233
00:10:39,338 --> 00:10:40,472
I never saw it.
234
00:10:40,473 --> 00:10:42,307
You never saw that movie?
235
00:10:42,308 --> 00:10:43,708
No, I didn't see it, Doug, okay,
236
00:10:43,709 --> 00:10:46,211
because while you and your
buddies were watching movies.
237
00:10:46,212 --> 00:10:47,679
I was working. Oh, here we go.
238
00:10:47,680 --> 00:10:50,182
Yeah, that's right. I had to
wait tables at Friendly's
239
00:10:50,183 --> 00:10:52,750
because I had to take care of my
father because I was a grownup.
240
00:10:52,751 --> 00:10:55,420
I had to be responsible.
241
00:10:55,421 --> 00:10:57,722
Oh, why do I even talk to you?
242
00:10:57,723 --> 00:11:00,125
You can't talk to me because
I'm Ferris Bueller,
243
00:11:00,126 --> 00:11:02,460
and you're his very
bitter sister.
244
00:11:04,463 --> 00:11:07,098
Oh, my God. You didn't
see that either.
245
00:11:07,099 --> 00:11:10,252
Okay, all I know is high
school is over for you, okay?
246
00:11:10,253 --> 00:11:12,620
Now I have to get back to
very grownup stuff here,
247
00:11:12,621 --> 00:11:14,122
so excuse me.
248
00:11:14,123 --> 00:11:15,623
Okay. You know, all I know is
249
00:11:15,624 --> 00:11:18,710
your lack of classic-movie
knowledge is terrifying!
250
00:11:53,963 --> 00:11:56,064
Hey, what's up, guys?
251
00:11:56,065 --> 00:11:58,350
You guys, uh, ready
to crush Roosevelt?
252
00:11:58,351 --> 00:11:59,667
Uh...
253
00:11:59,668 --> 00:12:01,186
Yeah.
254
00:12:01,187 --> 00:12:03,888
All right. Now, I hope you
guys aren't on the juice.
255
00:12:03,889 --> 00:12:05,090
But if you are,
256
00:12:05,091 --> 00:12:07,359
you know where to
come for clean pee.
257
00:12:08,077 --> 00:12:09,193
Great.
258
00:12:11,030 --> 00:12:12,196
So, uh...
259
00:12:12,197 --> 00:12:13,798
You work here now or...
260
00:12:13,799 --> 00:12:14,999
Work here? No, no, no.
261
00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:17,068
I'm just here for the
talk, here to listen,
262
00:12:17,069 --> 00:12:19,771
here to guide you guys through
the crazy minefield they call...
263
00:12:19,772 --> 00:12:21,823
the teen years.
264
00:12:21,824 --> 00:12:23,241
Great.
265
00:12:23,242 --> 00:12:24,342
Yeah. Yeah.
266
00:12:25,711 --> 00:12:28,863
Doug... what are you doing?
267
00:12:28,864 --> 00:12:30,865
I'm just hanging with the guys.
268
00:12:30,866 --> 00:12:35,637
We're supposed to be signing
mortgage papers in half an hour.
269
00:12:35,638 --> 00:12:36,654
Uh, Doug, we're gonna...
270
00:12:36,655 --> 00:12:39,007
Go score a couple of Red Bulls.
271
00:12:39,008 --> 00:12:40,158
See ya.
272
00:12:41,527 --> 00:12:44,296
Okay, thanks for embarrassing
me in front of my crew.
273
00:12:45,080 --> 00:12:46,664
Your crew.
274
00:12:46,665 --> 00:12:48,966
Um, okay. Here's how
it's gonna go down.
275
00:12:48,967 --> 00:12:51,002
I'm gonna go to
the ladies' room,
276
00:12:51,003 --> 00:12:53,237
and you wrap up with
'Nsync over there, okay?
277
00:12:53,238 --> 00:12:55,106
And then we're gonna
get outta here.
278
00:12:56,692 --> 00:12:59,361
Guys- Wait! Wait up!
279
00:13:00,262 --> 00:13:02,213
Hey, uh,
280
00:13:02,214 --> 00:13:03,698
can I bum one of those?
281
00:13:03,699 --> 00:13:05,817
Thank you.
282
00:13:10,072 --> 00:13:11,406
I'm not usually a
fan of hot pink,
283
00:13:11,407 --> 00:13:12,907
but you really made that work.
284
00:13:17,796 --> 00:13:20,182
Suzie, it's gonna be okay.
285
00:13:20,183 --> 00:13:22,450
It's not okay. He's
totally with Lisa now!
286
00:13:22,451 --> 00:13:24,085
Um...
287
00:13:24,086 --> 00:13:27,288
you're not supposed to
be smoking in here.
288
00:13:27,289 --> 00:13:29,190
Oh... really?
289
00:13:29,191 --> 00:13:31,659
Thank you for the heads up.
290
00:13:33,345 --> 00:13:35,680
I don't even understand
what I am without him.
291
00:13:35,681 --> 00:13:38,216
Just make him promise not
to cheat on you again,
292
00:13:38,217 --> 00:13:41,119
and get him a really nice gift.
293
00:13:41,120 --> 00:13:43,038
Wow, that's really great advice.
294
00:13:43,039 --> 00:13:44,939
Um, who are you?
295
00:13:44,940 --> 00:13:46,591
Um, I'm the only person
in this bathroom
296
00:13:46,592 --> 00:13:48,559
who knows anything about boys.
297
00:13:48,560 --> 00:13:50,862
Just dump the loser and move on.
298
00:13:50,863 --> 00:13:53,381
You don't understand.
I love him.
299
00:13:53,382 --> 00:13:56,217
And I keep hearing that stupid
Christina Aguilera song.
300
00:13:56,218 --> 00:13:58,119
It's my life.
301
00:14:08,614 --> 00:14:09,681
Stop.
302
00:14:11,617 --> 00:14:13,250
Stop it. Stop it, sweetie.
303
00:14:13,251 --> 00:14:15,386
Stop. Stop. Bring it down.
304
00:14:16,739 --> 00:14:19,457
You guys are very depressing
for cheerleaders.
305
00:14:19,458 --> 00:14:20,591
Excuse me...
306
00:14:20,592 --> 00:14:22,626
but my life is over!
307
00:14:22,627 --> 00:14:24,095
Oh, come on.
308
00:14:24,096 --> 00:14:25,830
You have the world at your feet.
309
00:14:25,831 --> 00:14:27,598
I mean, look at you.
You're pretty.
310
00:14:27,599 --> 00:14:30,701
You can probably bend in a
bunch of different ways.
311
00:14:32,238 --> 00:14:34,906
So one guy broke your heart.
You move on.
312
00:14:34,907 --> 00:14:36,657
But Brandon's perfect!
313
00:14:36,658 --> 00:14:39,093
Okay, let me explain something
to you about Brandon, okay?
314
00:14:39,094 --> 00:14:41,596
Twenty years from now,
he's gonna be 250 pounds
315
00:14:41,597 --> 00:14:45,066
and communicating to
you entirely in burps.
316
00:14:45,067 --> 00:14:46,901
Trust me.
317
00:14:46,902 --> 00:14:48,303
Wow.
318
00:14:48,304 --> 00:14:50,305
What else can you tell us?
319
00:14:50,306 --> 00:14:53,058
Well, um...
320
00:14:53,059 --> 00:14:55,760
unless you're planning on
being in the Ice Capades,
321
00:14:55,761 --> 00:14:58,496
let's lose the glitter
makeup, okay?
322
00:14:58,497 --> 00:15:00,648
Yeah.
323
00:15:00,649 --> 00:15:02,900
Okay. Well, it's time
to begin our program.
324
00:15:02,901 --> 00:15:05,236
We got a big game coming up,
325
00:15:05,237 --> 00:15:07,489
and we're gonna take
it to 'em, huh?
326
00:15:07,490 --> 00:15:09,223
Yeah.
327
00:15:10,409 --> 00:15:11,743
Good. That's the spirit.
328
00:15:11,744 --> 00:15:13,110
McGregor is so weak.
329
00:15:13,111 --> 00:15:15,847
I know. How are we supposed
to get pumped up to this?
330
00:15:15,848 --> 00:15:17,749
You guys want pumped up?
331
00:15:17,750 --> 00:15:19,450
You got it.
332
00:15:21,152 --> 00:15:24,505
I've never seen anybody run
a library the way you do.
333
00:15:24,506 --> 00:15:26,257
You know, in my condo
334
00:15:26,258 --> 00:15:29,627
I got books laying around
all over the place.
335
00:15:29,628 --> 00:15:33,364
Maybe you could come over
and help me arrange 'em.
336
00:15:37,436 --> 00:15:39,854
And after our big win,
337
00:15:39,855 --> 00:15:41,856
we're gonna bring it on
home to the state finals.
338
00:15:41,857 --> 00:15:43,524
Yeah, I'll take it from here, Mr.
McG.
339
00:15:43,525 --> 00:15:44,525
Doug Heffernan?
340
00:15:44,526 --> 00:15:46,945
Yeah, that's right. All right...
341
00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:48,679
I got one question
for you people,
342
00:15:48,680 --> 00:15:52,033
and that is, "What's
up, Commodores?"
343
00:15:53,752 --> 00:15:56,288
Okay, see, now, that
doesn't work for me,
344
00:15:56,289 --> 00:15:58,939
'cause back where I'm from, we
used to make a lotta noise.
345
00:15:58,940 --> 00:16:03,011
I'm gonna ask you again.
What's up, Commodores?!
346
00:16:06,132 --> 00:16:08,600
That's better. Now, you guys
ready to beat Roosevelt?!
347
00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:14,405
Yeah!
348
00:16:14,406 --> 00:16:16,774
How 'bout this half of the room?
We gonna win?
349
00:16:20,496 --> 00:16:22,480
Now this half!
350
00:16:26,502 --> 00:16:28,185
Now just the sexy people!
351
00:16:31,157 --> 00:16:33,123
Yeah! That's it! We're
gonna win this game,
352
00:16:33,124 --> 00:16:34,592
and we're gonna win every game
353
00:16:34,593 --> 00:16:37,796
till we're kissing that
championship trophy!
354
00:16:41,116 --> 00:16:42,700
And I'll tell you
something else!
355
00:16:42,701 --> 00:16:44,719
You know what
Roosevelt can kiss?
356
00:16:44,720 --> 00:16:46,954
They can kiss this!
357
00:17:04,223 --> 00:17:07,158
God's sakes, Heffernan...
358
00:17:07,159 --> 00:17:08,660
pull your pants up.
359
00:17:16,202 --> 00:17:19,370
Okay, Arthur, I'm here.
360
00:17:19,371 --> 00:17:22,940
It's me. Holly.
361
00:17:27,913 --> 00:17:31,182
"Lost my voice from screaming.
362
00:17:31,183 --> 00:17:34,251
Also would like to
go to petting zoo. "
363
00:17:41,110 --> 00:17:43,260
Do you want a glass of water?
364
00:17:48,367 --> 00:17:51,669
No. No, Arthur, you can do this.
365
00:17:51,670 --> 00:17:53,571
Yes, you can. You- Yes, you can!
366
00:17:53,572 --> 00:17:54,638
You absolu-
367
00:17:54,639 --> 00:17:56,674
Arthur, you have to
believe in yourself!
368
00:17:56,675 --> 00:17:58,076
You have to believe in yourself!
369
00:17:58,077 --> 00:17:59,143
You can do this!
370
00:17:59,144 --> 00:18:02,497
You can do this! You can do this!
Water!
371
00:18:02,498 --> 00:18:04,416
Water! Water!
372
00:18:04,417 --> 00:18:07,351
Water.
373
00:18:09,388 --> 00:18:11,122
Water...
374
00:18:14,059 --> 00:18:16,060
Hey.
375
00:18:16,061 --> 00:18:18,062
What are you doing here?
376
00:18:18,063 --> 00:18:20,397
I was teaching little Suzie
Pinkus how to smoke,
377
00:18:20,398 --> 00:18:23,300
and the little princess
threw up and got us caught.
378
00:18:23,301 --> 00:18:25,403
What are you here for?
379
00:18:25,404 --> 00:18:27,638
It'll all be in the
police report.
380
00:18:32,010 --> 00:18:34,278
Hi.
381
00:18:34,279 --> 00:18:35,713
Hey.
382
00:18:35,714 --> 00:18:36,714
This your wife?
383
00:18:36,715 --> 00:18:38,049
Yeah, this is Carrie.
384
00:18:38,050 --> 00:18:40,084
Carrie, this is Coach Walcott.
385
00:18:40,085 --> 00:18:41,703
Hi. Hi, Carrie.
386
00:18:41,704 --> 00:18:43,621
That short for Carlene?
387
00:18:43,622 --> 00:18:44,923
No.
388
00:18:44,924 --> 00:18:45,940
That's weird.
389
00:18:50,495 --> 00:18:51,796
You know...
390
00:18:53,716 --> 00:18:55,884
You can't, uh... smoke
391
00:18:55,885 --> 00:18:58,019
anywhere on school grounds.
392
00:18:58,020 --> 00:19:00,388
Yes, I know. It'll
never happen again.
393
00:19:00,389 --> 00:19:02,607
And as for you, Dougie...
394
00:19:02,608 --> 00:19:04,859
you pull your pants down
395
00:19:04,860 --> 00:19:05,927
when you're a little kid,
396
00:19:05,928 --> 00:19:08,229
it's cute.
397
00:19:08,230 --> 00:19:10,598
When you're approaching 40,
398
00:19:10,599 --> 00:19:12,800
shaped like you...
399
00:19:14,870 --> 00:19:17,105
it's... disturbing.
400
00:19:21,009 --> 00:19:22,976
I kn- I know that now.
401
00:19:24,330 --> 00:19:27,548
Now, I've got a story I
wanna share with you.
402
00:19:27,549 --> 00:19:30,684
Quite a few years ago, I was...
403
00:19:30,685 --> 00:19:33,254
quite a football hero.
404
00:19:37,959 --> 00:19:40,678
You like that picture,
don't ya, Cheryl?
405
00:19:40,679 --> 00:19:42,213
Mm-hmm.
406
00:19:42,214 --> 00:19:44,882
Yeah, uh-huh! Anyway, I...
407
00:19:44,883 --> 00:19:47,602
I used to drop by my old
high school, you know.
408
00:19:47,603 --> 00:19:49,470
I didn't belong there.
409
00:19:49,471 --> 00:19:52,507
Actually, you did, 'cause...
410
00:19:52,508 --> 00:19:55,410
you're a high school
football coach, you know?
411
00:19:55,411 --> 00:19:58,212
Let me tell you a
different story.
412
00:19:58,213 --> 00:20:00,048
No, no, coach. I
think we get it.
413
00:20:00,049 --> 00:20:02,500
He's telling us that we
can't go home again.
414
00:20:02,501 --> 00:20:06,086
Exactly. Now, if you'll
just listen to Charlene...
415
00:20:08,791 --> 00:20:10,792
I've gotta get back right away,
416
00:20:10,793 --> 00:20:13,260
because I got a
librarian coming over,
417
00:20:13,261 --> 00:20:15,563
and I gotta pick up
a bunch of books.
418
00:20:20,451 --> 00:20:22,319
I really love ya, buddy.
419
00:20:23,388 --> 00:20:25,589
I'll see ya in... 20 years.
420
00:20:29,260 --> 00:20:32,730
So... are you ready to leave?
421
00:20:35,484 --> 00:20:37,184
Yeah.
422
00:20:44,026 --> 00:20:45,993
So are you still mad at me?
423
00:20:45,994 --> 00:20:48,996
No. I get the whole
high school thing now.
424
00:20:48,997 --> 00:20:50,497
You do?
425
00:20:50,498 --> 00:20:51,933
Yeah. I had some fun
426
00:20:51,934 --> 00:20:54,435
in the bathroom with
some cheerleaders.
427
00:20:56,271 --> 00:20:58,772
I wanna hear that story.
428
00:21:08,783 --> 00:21:12,352
So tell me more about
your work with...
429
00:21:12,353 --> 00:21:14,055
With the blind.
430
00:21:16,608 --> 00:21:17,909
Um...
431
00:21:17,910 --> 00:21:19,493
Okay.
30099
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