Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:10,607 --> 00:00:12,240
So, I'm making the copies,
2
00:00:12,308 --> 00:00:13,875
and this freakshow,
Mark churnin,
3
00:00:13,943 --> 00:00:15,342
comes up and says,
4
00:00:15,410 --> 00:00:17,011
"hey, can I just jump
in for one quick copy?"
5
00:00:17,078 --> 00:00:18,912
And what happens? Paper jam.
6
00:00:18,979 --> 00:00:20,179
3 hours to fix.
7
00:00:20,247 --> 00:00:23,114
All for a friggin'
wizard of ID cartoon.
8
00:00:23,181 --> 00:00:24,548
It was so annoying.
9
00:00:24,616 --> 00:00:25,816
Look out!
10
00:00:25,884 --> 00:00:27,951
Oh, my God.
11
00:00:28,019 --> 00:00:29,318
Oh, my God.
12
00:00:30,686 --> 00:00:34,189
Well, that was incredibly
annoying, Doug.
13
00:00:35,823 --> 00:00:36,990
What?
14
00:00:37,058 --> 00:00:38,525
You know, tellin' me
how to drive, ok?
15
00:00:38,592 --> 00:00:40,059
I wasn't tellin'
you how to drive.
16
00:00:40,127 --> 00:00:42,060
I was letting you know
we were about to die.
17
00:00:42,128 --> 00:00:43,895
I saw him.
18
00:00:43,963 --> 00:00:45,163
Yeah, I saw him, too.
19
00:00:45,231 --> 00:00:46,863
He was almost in my eyeball.
20
00:00:46,932 --> 00:00:48,031
For your information,
21
00:00:48,098 --> 00:00:49,198
the only reason I swerved
22
00:00:49,266 --> 00:00:51,117
is 'cause you screamed
like a little girl.
23
00:00:51,185 --> 00:00:52,317
"Eek, a mouse!"
24
00:00:52,384 --> 00:00:54,319
Ok, you know what? It
wasn't, "eek, a mouse."
25
00:00:54,386 --> 00:00:55,519
It was, "eek! An oil truck!"
26
00:00:55,586 --> 00:00:57,420
Let me just drive,
would you, ok?
27
00:00:57,487 --> 00:00:59,622
I promise I will get you and
your doughnuts home safely.
28
00:00:59,690 --> 00:01:00,790
Fine. You know what?
29
00:01:00,858 --> 00:01:02,324
From now on, I'm
not sayin' a word.
30
00:01:02,391 --> 00:01:04,058
That works for me, hon'. Fine.
31
00:01:08,945 --> 00:01:10,212
Red light!
32
00:01:13,266 --> 00:01:14,266
I saw that.
33
00:01:49,890 --> 00:01:53,025
Mark Twain was more than
a mere nom de plume.
34
00:01:53,093 --> 00:01:55,327
He was a full-bodied alter ego
35
00:01:55,394 --> 00:01:57,561
who allowed clemens
to speak with a voice
36
00:01:57,628 --> 00:01:59,596
that was inelegant,
37
00:01:59,664 --> 00:02:01,297
at times profane,
38
00:02:01,365 --> 00:02:04,249
but always uniquely American.
39
00:02:05,634 --> 00:02:07,101
Hey, Spence, do me a favor.
40
00:02:07,169 --> 00:02:08,802
Stuff that oily rag in my mouth,
41
00:02:08,870 --> 00:02:10,787
and light me on fire.
42
00:02:10,855 --> 00:02:12,054
This is a great documentary.
43
00:02:12,122 --> 00:02:13,489
Give it a chance.
44
00:02:13,557 --> 00:02:16,324
All right, but if Mrs. Twain
doesn't take her top off soon,
45
00:02:16,392 --> 00:02:17,908
we're going back to cops.
46
00:02:20,829 --> 00:02:22,863
Oh, hey, you know,
that's light beer.
47
00:02:22,931 --> 00:02:24,062
I know.
48
00:02:24,130 --> 00:02:25,463
Well, just, you
told me to warn you
49
00:02:25,531 --> 00:02:26,965
in case you grabbed
one by mistake.
50
00:02:27,083 --> 00:02:28,016
No, no.
51
00:02:28,084 --> 00:02:29,250
I know... I know. It's ok.
52
00:02:29,317 --> 00:02:31,451
I'm... I'm tryin' to get back
down to my football weight
53
00:02:31,519 --> 00:02:33,119
for the reunion.
54
00:02:34,654 --> 00:02:36,837
You know what?
55
00:02:36,905 --> 00:02:39,490
Light beer does suck,
and I am who I am.
56
00:02:42,176 --> 00:02:43,575
So do you want me
to pick you up?
57
00:02:43,643 --> 00:02:45,077
We'll go together?
58
00:02:45,145 --> 00:02:47,145
Um, I don't think I'm
gonna go to the reunion.
59
00:02:47,212 --> 00:02:49,347
Why not? 'Cause... 'cause
you work in the subway?
60
00:02:49,414 --> 00:02:51,781
I bet there are guys from our
class who live in the subway.
61
00:02:51,849 --> 00:02:53,582
That's not why. Um...
62
00:02:56,303 --> 00:02:58,002
The truth is,
63
00:02:58,069 --> 00:02:59,604
I had a very intense
relationship
64
00:02:59,671 --> 00:03:00,971
with someone from high school,
65
00:03:01,039 --> 00:03:02,573
and it would be quite
awkward for us
66
00:03:02,774 --> 00:03:03,788
to see each other again.
67
00:03:03,856 --> 00:03:05,390
Who was it, Sally
your-right-hand?
68
00:03:05,458 --> 00:03:06,458
No!
69
00:03:07,593 --> 00:03:09,493
If you must know,
it was a teacher.
70
00:03:09,561 --> 00:03:12,228
Miss berman, the weird home
ec teacher with the limp?
71
00:03:12,296 --> 00:03:14,163
No, no, no. It wasn't Mrs.
berman.
72
00:03:14,231 --> 00:03:18,032
It was miss Mancini,
the Spanish teacher.
73
00:03:18,099 --> 00:03:19,216
Ok, yeah. You had a thing
74
00:03:19,285 --> 00:03:20,817
with the hottest
teacher in school?
75
00:03:20,885 --> 00:03:21,851
Yes. Yes.
76
00:03:21,919 --> 00:03:23,654
It was the summer
after we graduated,
77
00:03:23,721 --> 00:03:25,187
and we ran into each other
78
00:03:25,255 --> 00:03:27,021
at the Jersey shore.
79
00:03:27,089 --> 00:03:28,523
I won her a stuffed frog
80
00:03:28,591 --> 00:03:29,624
playing skee-ball,
81
00:03:29,692 --> 00:03:33,409
and that night she
made me a man.
82
00:03:34,662 --> 00:03:36,162
I... I promised
to call her back.
83
00:03:36,229 --> 00:03:37,928
I never did. I'm sure
she's very upset.
84
00:03:37,996 --> 00:03:39,497
Ok, little tip. If
you want anybody
85
00:03:39,564 --> 00:03:40,881
to believe any part
of this story,
86
00:03:40,949 --> 00:03:43,650
I would have gone with
limpy from home ec.
87
00:03:43,718 --> 00:03:45,351
Hey, hon'. Hey, Spence.
88
00:03:45,418 --> 00:03:46,652
I'm gonna go to the gym now.
89
00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:47,953
Look, remember how I was gonna
90
00:03:48,020 --> 00:03:49,854
lose 20 pounds for my reunion?
Yeah.
91
00:03:49,921 --> 00:03:51,287
Well, that's not gonna happen,
92
00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:53,724
so I'm gonna need you to get your
body just that much tighter,
93
00:03:53,791 --> 00:03:55,891
you know, to make up for me.
94
00:03:55,959 --> 00:03:57,576
I will do my best. Ok.
95
00:03:57,645 --> 00:03:58,877
Ok. Bye-bye.
96
00:03:58,945 --> 00:04:00,544
What you got going on
on your head there?
97
00:04:00,612 --> 00:04:02,279
Oh. Oh, I just put
my hair up in a bun
98
00:04:02,347 --> 00:04:03,447
for spinning class.
99
00:04:03,515 --> 00:04:05,581
Hey, knobby!
100
00:04:05,650 --> 00:04:07,082
Does this thing get f.M.
Stations?
101
00:04:07,150 --> 00:04:08,450
Ok, hon'. All right, I'm going.
102
00:04:08,518 --> 00:04:10,285
All righty, bye-bye.
103
00:04:12,570 --> 00:04:13,753
Hey, honey, instead
of the movie,
104
00:04:13,821 --> 00:04:15,705
you want to go to the
new sculpture garden
105
00:04:15,773 --> 00:04:16,907
at the Brooklyn museum?
106
00:04:16,974 --> 00:04:18,139
Oh, I'd love to see that.
107
00:04:19,342 --> 00:04:20,492
Who do you think I am?
108
00:04:20,559 --> 00:04:21,626
Oh, right. You ready?
109
00:04:22,227 --> 00:04:23,226
Yeah.
110
00:04:24,262 --> 00:04:25,828
Hey, you going with
the bun again?
111
00:04:25,896 --> 00:04:27,363
Yep.
112
00:04:27,431 --> 00:04:29,230
You know, we're, uh,
going to the movies.
113
00:04:29,299 --> 00:04:30,565
We're not going to the library.
114
00:04:30,633 --> 00:04:32,600
I like it, ok?
115
00:04:32,668 --> 00:04:34,901
And Amy, the spinning
teacher at the gym, said
116
00:04:34,968 --> 00:04:36,469
it looked really cute.
117
00:04:36,537 --> 00:04:37,904
Come on, give me one of these:
118
00:04:37,971 --> 00:04:40,988
"Shh. People are
trying to study."
119
00:04:41,056 --> 00:04:43,057
Like you know what
goes on in a library.
120
00:04:43,124 --> 00:04:45,492
Come on, honey, let's go.
121
00:04:47,494 --> 00:04:49,110
♪
122
00:05:34,860 --> 00:05:36,643
Hey, babe, what's up?
123
00:05:36,645 --> 00:05:37,793
Nothing.
124
00:05:37,861 --> 00:05:39,496
Just gettin' some
chips for the boys.
125
00:05:44,983 --> 00:05:46,451
Hey, you guys want
to hit Cooper's
126
00:05:46,518 --> 00:05:47,950
for the mets game
on Friday night?
127
00:05:47,952 --> 00:05:49,134
Ooh. Can't.
128
00:05:49,201 --> 00:05:50,969
Me, Doug, and Spence got
a reunion that night.
129
00:05:51,037 --> 00:05:52,938
Uh, actually, I don't
think I'm gonna go.
130
00:05:53,005 --> 00:05:56,473
Por que? Senorita Mancini?
131
00:05:56,541 --> 00:05:57,957
Doug told you about that?
132
00:05:58,025 --> 00:05:59,226
Si, senor.
133
00:05:59,294 --> 00:06:00,393
Ok. Well, hey,
134
00:06:00,460 --> 00:06:01,459
it's true, ok?
135
00:06:01,527 --> 00:06:03,195
We had a very intense
thing together.
136
00:06:03,262 --> 00:06:04,912
Right, right. That
probably happened
137
00:06:04,980 --> 00:06:06,263
while I was busy smoking crack
138
00:06:06,331 --> 00:06:07,513
with mrs.Greenbaum.
139
00:06:09,817 --> 00:06:11,016
I mean, you believe
140
00:06:11,084 --> 00:06:12,534
it happened, right, Deac'?
141
00:06:12,602 --> 00:06:13,951
I believe you believe it.
142
00:06:14,019 --> 00:06:15,219
All right. You know what?
143
00:06:15,287 --> 00:06:17,205
Fine. I'll go, all right?
144
00:06:17,272 --> 00:06:20,639
But just be ready for a
very big, ugly scene.
145
00:06:20,707 --> 00:06:21,707
Oh, hey, Doug.
146
00:06:21,774 --> 00:06:23,441
Thanks for turning
my personal memory
147
00:06:23,509 --> 00:06:25,076
into a cheap laugh.
Hope you had fun.
148
00:06:25,143 --> 00:06:26,911
You got it.
149
00:06:26,978 --> 00:06:28,912
Let me ask you guys a question.
150
00:06:28,979 --> 00:06:31,581
What do you think about women
wearing their hair up in buns?
151
00:06:31,648 --> 00:06:32,665
Ooh.
152
00:06:32,733 --> 00:06:34,382
Fugly.
153
00:06:34,500 --> 00:06:36,266
Am I crazy? I mean,
is that a good look?
154
00:06:36,334 --> 00:06:37,501
Yeah, if you're the old lady
155
00:06:37,569 --> 00:06:39,169
who owns tweety bird.
156
00:06:39,237 --> 00:06:41,103
Thank you. Carrie started
wearing her hair in a bun
157
00:06:41,170 --> 00:06:42,270
like a week ago,
158
00:06:42,338 --> 00:06:43,705
and I thought it
was just gonna be
159
00:06:43,773 --> 00:06:45,007
like a one-time thing,
160
00:06:45,074 --> 00:06:46,841
but it's... it's hangin'
on like a bad cold.
161
00:06:46,908 --> 00:06:48,642
Ouch. Tough break, man.
162
00:06:48,709 --> 00:06:49,809
I just don't get it.
163
00:06:49,877 --> 00:06:51,210
I mean, tying your hair up?
164
00:06:51,278 --> 00:06:53,345
I mean, why not tape
your breasts down
165
00:06:53,412 --> 00:06:54,846
while you're at it, am I right?
166
00:06:54,913 --> 00:06:55,947
You're so right.
167
00:06:56,015 --> 00:06:57,448
And the only reason
she's doing it
168
00:06:57,516 --> 00:07:00,150
is because some girl at the gym
told her she liked it that way.
169
00:07:00,217 --> 00:07:01,483
W-why do they ask other women?
170
00:07:01,551 --> 00:07:02,685
I mean, we're here.
171
00:07:02,753 --> 00:07:03,752
We know what we want.
172
00:07:03,819 --> 00:07:05,453
We're ready to answer
their questions.
173
00:07:05,521 --> 00:07:06,788
It's easy. Halter top? Yes.
174
00:07:06,856 --> 00:07:07,889
Driving miss Daisy hair?
175
00:07:07,957 --> 00:07:09,056
No, thank you.
176
00:07:09,124 --> 00:07:10,222
Amen.
177
00:07:12,660 --> 00:07:14,527
Oh, God.
178
00:07:14,594 --> 00:07:16,727
What if Carrie wears
the bun to my reunion?
179
00:07:16,795 --> 00:07:18,562
She... she wouldn't
do that, would she?
180
00:07:18,630 --> 00:07:19,863
I don't know, man.
181
00:07:19,931 --> 00:07:21,796
She sounds pretty messed up.
182
00:07:24,017 --> 00:07:25,550
I might have to say
something to her.
183
00:07:25,619 --> 00:07:27,668
You're gonna tell Carrie
she doesn't look good?
184
00:07:28,853 --> 00:07:30,988
I admire your acorns.
185
00:07:31,055 --> 00:07:32,554
Arthur, I'm here!
186
00:07:33,773 --> 00:07:36,574
Holly, Arthur went
down to Atlantic city
187
00:07:36,642 --> 00:07:37,808
with his friend m-Mickey.
188
00:07:37,876 --> 00:07:39,076
He... he didn't call you?
189
00:07:39,143 --> 00:07:40,494
Oh, I must have missed it.
190
00:07:40,562 --> 00:07:42,262
I was pretty hung-over.
191
00:07:42,329 --> 00:07:44,062
Anyway, see you next time.
192
00:07:45,314 --> 00:07:47,265
H-h-hold up a second.
193
00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:50,567
Ok, look,
194
00:07:50,635 --> 00:07:52,202
here's the thing:
195
00:07:52,269 --> 00:07:56,337
Carrie started wearing
her hair in a bun.
196
00:07:58,607 --> 00:07:59,691
Ok.
197
00:07:59,842 --> 00:08:02,508
Well, th-th-the problem is, I
can't tell her I don't like it
198
00:08:02,576 --> 00:08:04,843
because I think I wrote
something in my wedding vows
199
00:08:04,911 --> 00:08:07,145
about loving her no matter what.
200
00:08:07,213 --> 00:08:09,013
But,
201
00:08:09,081 --> 00:08:11,081
but if it was to come
from someone else...
202
00:08:11,149 --> 00:08:13,649
Say, like, another woman...
203
00:08:13,717 --> 00:08:14,883
Me? Oh, no, no, no.
204
00:08:14,951 --> 00:08:16,184
I could never do that.
205
00:08:16,252 --> 00:08:18,252
Plus, Carrie wouldn't care
what I thought, anyway.
206
00:08:18,320 --> 00:08:19,353
That-that's not true.
207
00:08:19,421 --> 00:08:20,687
I mean, she has mentioned to me
208
00:08:20,755 --> 00:08:22,523
how much she admires
your sense of style.
209
00:08:22,591 --> 00:08:23,589
Really?
210
00:08:23,656 --> 00:08:24,806
Yes. Just the other day,
211
00:08:24,874 --> 00:08:26,859
she was wondering where
you got this very outfit.
212
00:08:26,926 --> 00:08:27,893
This?
213
00:08:27,961 --> 00:08:29,443
Dress barn. Dress barn.
Thank you.
214
00:08:29,511 --> 00:08:30,561
I will tell her. Yeah. Yeah.
215
00:08:30,628 --> 00:08:31,762
Thank you.
216
00:08:31,830 --> 00:08:33,597
Look, you'd... you'd
really be helpin' me out,
217
00:08:33,665 --> 00:08:35,264
and you'd be helping
Carrie out, too.
218
00:08:35,332 --> 00:08:37,766
I-it's... it's like when
you do an intervention
219
00:08:37,834 --> 00:08:40,168
with a... a drug addict,
220
00:08:40,235 --> 00:08:42,269
except in this case, the monkey,
221
00:08:42,337 --> 00:08:44,471
it's on the back of her head.
222
00:08:46,473 --> 00:08:47,506
I don't... I don't know.
223
00:08:47,574 --> 00:08:49,407
I'll tell you what.
$20, right there.
224
00:08:49,476 --> 00:08:51,843
No, I couldn't take
money for this.
225
00:08:51,910 --> 00:08:53,944
Although I am a
little low on cash.
226
00:08:54,011 --> 00:08:56,412
Goin' a little crazy
with the lotto tickets.
227
00:08:56,480 --> 00:08:57,563
Here. Thanks.
228
00:08:57,631 --> 00:08:58,412
Hmm.
229
00:09:00,899 --> 00:09:02,132
Oh, hey, hol'.
230
00:09:02,200 --> 00:09:04,633
Um, my dad's in Atlantic city.
231
00:09:04,701 --> 00:09:06,752
Yeah, I kn... I know...
I know. That's ok.
232
00:09:09,788 --> 00:09:11,572
Well, see you later.
233
00:09:12,540 --> 00:09:15,074
Hey, hey. Um,
234
00:09:16,076 --> 00:09:17,909
like your shoes.
235
00:09:17,977 --> 00:09:19,177
Well, thank you.
236
00:09:19,244 --> 00:09:20,245
Yes, but that bun,
237
00:09:20,396 --> 00:09:22,763
not workin' for you, girlfriend.
238
00:09:29,519 --> 00:09:31,101
What?
239
00:09:31,169 --> 00:09:33,203
You know, just maybe
there's a better l-look,
240
00:09:33,271 --> 00:09:35,605
you know, for you.
241
00:09:35,673 --> 00:09:38,707
Well, Holly, my hairstyle
is really my business,
242
00:09:38,774 --> 00:09:39,874
now, isn't it?
243
00:09:39,942 --> 00:09:41,242
Yes. Yes, it is.
244
00:09:43,479 --> 00:09:45,578
I got this at dress barn.
245
00:09:47,381 --> 00:09:48,914
Good to know.
246
00:10:02,658 --> 00:10:04,175
And then, out of nowhere,
247
00:10:04,242 --> 00:10:06,259
Holly starts talkin'
about my hair
248
00:10:06,327 --> 00:10:08,043
and where she bought
this horrible dress
249
00:10:08,061 --> 00:10:09,662
she was wearing. It was creepy.
250
00:10:10,580 --> 00:10:12,929
Yeah, I hear she drinks a lot.
251
00:10:15,900 --> 00:10:17,901
What you... What you doin'?
252
00:10:17,969 --> 00:10:20,569
Well, I'm in the mood
for a little lovin',
253
00:10:20,636 --> 00:10:23,338
and you're the only
guy here, so...
254
00:10:31,777 --> 00:10:34,045
I love you.
255
00:10:34,113 --> 00:10:36,146
Oh, honey, you're sweet.
256
00:10:36,214 --> 00:10:38,381
I love you, too. Come here.
257
00:10:51,158 --> 00:10:53,657
Oh, I love you so much. Oh, God,
I love you. I just love you.
258
00:10:53,725 --> 00:10:55,826
Oh, ok, honey, get off. What...
what are you doing?
259
00:10:55,894 --> 00:10:57,527
Get off! Get it out!
260
00:10:58,095 --> 00:10:59,228
What?
261
00:10:59,295 --> 00:11:01,663
What are you talking about?
262
00:11:01,731 --> 00:11:03,048
It's just...
263
00:11:04,416 --> 00:11:06,182
Your bun.
264
00:11:06,250 --> 00:11:10,052
My bun? You don't like my bun?
265
00:11:10,120 --> 00:11:12,304
I can't stand it.
266
00:11:12,372 --> 00:11:13,655
Oh, my God.
267
00:11:13,722 --> 00:11:15,856
So that stupid thing with Holly,
268
00:11:15,923 --> 00:11:18,675
that was you? You
asked her to do that?
269
00:11:18,743 --> 00:11:20,943
Actually, I paid her to.
270
00:11:21,010 --> 00:11:23,678
You paid her? Well, I... I...
271
00:11:23,746 --> 00:11:25,948
Thank God that money's not
going to our mortgage,
272
00:11:26,015 --> 00:11:28,781
'cause we got a bun
crisis on our hands!
273
00:11:28,849 --> 00:11:30,867
It's just that you got so
many great hair looks,
274
00:11:30,935 --> 00:11:33,301
like down, over here,
you know, bangs.
275
00:11:33,368 --> 00:11:34,869
When we met, it was all big,
276
00:11:34,937 --> 00:11:37,538
and I just don't think the bun
is the pick of the litter.
277
00:11:37,605 --> 00:11:39,722
What, what don't you like
about it, Doug? Tell me.
278
00:11:39,789 --> 00:11:41,423
I mean, obviously,
out of the 2 of us,
279
00:11:41,491 --> 00:11:43,525
you are the one with the fashion sense.
I mean...
280
00:11:44,727 --> 00:11:47,427
T-shirt over stained sweats,
281
00:11:47,495 --> 00:11:49,962
how is that not in
every magazine?
282
00:11:50,029 --> 00:11:51,597
You know, what, it's
not just me, ok?
283
00:11:51,665 --> 00:11:53,132
Buns are bad.
Everybody thinks so.
284
00:11:53,199 --> 00:11:54,749
Oh, really? Everybody thinks so?
285
00:11:54,817 --> 00:11:56,517
That's funny, because
everyone at work who sees it,
286
00:11:56,585 --> 00:11:57,701
says it looks really good.
287
00:11:57,769 --> 00:11:59,036
They're just kissing up to you.
288
00:11:59,104 --> 00:12:00,636
Why is that, because
I'm a secretary
289
00:12:00,704 --> 00:12:02,737
and I know where the
sweet'n low is?
290
00:12:02,805 --> 00:12:05,140
No, Doug, buns are
very chic, ok?
291
00:12:05,208 --> 00:12:07,841
They happen to be the
preferred look in Spain.
292
00:12:07,908 --> 00:12:10,744
Well, then, why don't you
wear a sombrero, too?
293
00:12:10,761 --> 00:12:14,412
That's Mexico, you
friggin' idiot.
294
00:12:14,480 --> 00:12:17,348
The thing is, I'm not making this up.
Like, um, in the movie,
295
00:12:17,415 --> 00:12:19,950
there's always the mousy
receptionist with the bun.
296
00:12:20,018 --> 00:12:21,717
And... and no one will
look at her twice
297
00:12:21,785 --> 00:12:23,786
until finally she
lets her hair down.
298
00:12:23,854 --> 00:12:25,186
And then, everybody's like,
299
00:12:25,254 --> 00:12:28,122
"why, miss freihoffer,
you're beautiful."
300
00:12:29,491 --> 00:12:31,240
And what movie is that, Doug?
301
00:12:31,308 --> 00:12:32,775
I don't know, but it's a movie.
302
00:12:32,843 --> 00:12:34,058
Mmm. Must have missed that.
303
00:12:34,126 --> 00:12:37,161
Sorry, I don't watch 112 hours of T.V.
A week.
304
00:12:37,229 --> 00:12:39,947
Ok, you know, you want to talk about
my T.V. Problem, that's valid,
305
00:12:40,082 --> 00:12:41,597
but not until this
bun thing is over.
306
00:12:41,665 --> 00:12:43,098
Well, I'll tell you,
307
00:12:43,166 --> 00:12:44,767
I don't think this bun
thing is gonna be over,
308
00:12:44,835 --> 00:12:46,901
because the more you talk,
the more I'm liking this.
309
00:12:46,969 --> 00:12:48,735
Look, it's just a
stupid little problem!
310
00:12:48,803 --> 00:12:50,704
Why are you giving me
so much crap about it?
311
00:12:50,772 --> 00:12:52,972
Because when I came in here
to make love to my husband,
312
00:12:53,039 --> 00:12:54,223
his idea of foreplay
313
00:12:54,291 --> 00:12:55,656
was to pull my hair
out of my head
314
00:12:55,725 --> 00:12:57,192
and tell me I repulse him.
315
00:12:57,194 --> 00:12:58,475
I never said that! It's...
316
00:12:58,543 --> 00:13:00,511
It's not about you or
me, it's about the bun.
317
00:13:00,578 --> 00:13:03,246
You know what? Maybe you
would like my bun better
318
00:13:03,313 --> 00:13:05,247
if it had powdered sugar on it.
319
00:13:05,314 --> 00:13:07,399
Oh. Ok.
320
00:13:07,600 --> 00:13:09,983
It took some time, but
I knew you'd go there:
321
00:13:10,051 --> 00:13:11,718
"Fatty like cake."
322
00:13:13,054 --> 00:13:14,404
How predictable.
323
00:13:14,472 --> 00:13:15,736
I'll tell you one thing,
324
00:13:15,804 --> 00:13:17,838
you're not wearing that little
hair burger to my reunion.
325
00:13:17,906 --> 00:13:22,191
Oh, ok, so you're scared my
bun is gonna humiliate you
326
00:13:22,259 --> 00:13:24,443
in front of your
high school friends?
327
00:13:24,511 --> 00:13:27,829
Not just my friends. People
I don't even know, too.
328
00:13:27,897 --> 00:13:29,697
Well, you know what, Doug?
329
00:13:29,764 --> 00:13:32,365
I could take the bun
out for your reunion,
330
00:13:32,433 --> 00:13:33,666
easily done,
331
00:13:33,734 --> 00:13:36,001
or, and I am leaning this way,
332
00:13:36,069 --> 00:13:39,469
I could leave it in
and just not go.
333
00:13:39,537 --> 00:13:41,072
Let's do that.
334
00:13:41,906 --> 00:13:43,006
Fine.
335
00:13:43,074 --> 00:13:44,140
Fine.
336
00:13:44,207 --> 00:13:45,440
Good night to you.
337
00:13:45,508 --> 00:13:46,942
Good night.
338
00:13:50,745 --> 00:13:53,013
Yeah, look at it, look at it!
339
00:14:03,504 --> 00:14:05,338
Morning. Morning.
340
00:14:19,364 --> 00:14:22,900
That feels good.
341
00:14:22,967 --> 00:14:25,284
By the way, I'll be going to
my reunion directly from work.
342
00:14:25,352 --> 00:14:26,735
Probably gonna be late, too.
343
00:14:26,803 --> 00:14:28,754
Great. Gives me a
little alone time.
344
00:14:28,822 --> 00:14:30,921
Yeah. Hey, maybe you can
kick back in your rocker
345
00:14:30,989 --> 00:14:34,408
and knit something.
346
00:14:34,476 --> 00:14:38,277
Sorry I won't be there to help
you impress your little buddies.
347
00:14:38,344 --> 00:14:40,596
Oh, you'll be there.
348
00:14:40,663 --> 00:14:42,146
What's that?
349
00:14:42,214 --> 00:14:46,015
Just a little picture of you
from our trip to Barbados.
350
00:14:46,033 --> 00:14:49,435
Beautiful, long hair
flowing in the breeze,
351
00:14:49,503 --> 00:14:51,836
and, yeah, a little younger.
352
00:14:51,838 --> 00:14:52,919
Give me that.
353
00:14:52,987 --> 00:14:55,155
No.
354
00:14:57,090 --> 00:14:59,390
Get your own, bun-head! Ow!
355
00:14:59,458 --> 00:15:01,025
Yeah. Ok.
356
00:15:01,093 --> 00:15:02,994
Oh, you know what? I
make shakes in there!
357
00:15:07,064 --> 00:15:08,131
Hi.
358
00:15:08,198 --> 00:15:09,732
Hey, guys. Ooh, coffee.
359
00:15:09,800 --> 00:15:12,867
Come on, man. Let's
get out of here.
360
00:15:12,934 --> 00:15:14,068
Carrie, you mind if I...
361
00:15:14,136 --> 00:15:16,302
No. Go ahead, honey. Thanks.
362
00:15:18,154 --> 00:15:19,604
Deacon.
363
00:15:19,672 --> 00:15:21,106
Mmm? Can I ask you a question?
364
00:15:21,174 --> 00:15:22,673
Sure.
365
00:15:22,741 --> 00:15:25,626
What do you think of
my hair like this?
366
00:15:26,460 --> 00:15:28,927
You... you mean the bun?
367
00:15:28,995 --> 00:15:30,812
Yeah, come on, the truth.
368
00:15:30,880 --> 00:15:33,330
Well, I-I-in general,
I think it's, um...
369
00:15:33,398 --> 00:15:34,698
Just tell me.
370
00:15:34,766 --> 00:15:37,134
It's ass ugly, girl.
371
00:15:45,072 --> 00:15:46,873
♪
372
00:15:49,476 --> 00:15:51,209
♪ You come and go
373
00:15:51,276 --> 00:15:52,710
then, after medical school,
374
00:15:52,777 --> 00:15:55,678
I designed this implantable
insulin pump for diabetics.
375
00:15:55,746 --> 00:15:57,746
I do pretty well from
the patent on that,
376
00:15:57,814 --> 00:16:00,316
but I'm still working over at
mount sinai with the kids.
377
00:16:00,383 --> 00:16:01,382
Oh, excellent.
378
00:16:01,450 --> 00:16:02,483
So what do you do?
379
00:16:02,551 --> 00:16:04,352
I'm married to her.
380
00:16:05,620 --> 00:16:07,937
Cute. Very cute. What
happened to the picture?
381
00:16:08,005 --> 00:16:10,373
I had to tape it together. My
wife stuck it in a blender,
382
00:16:10,440 --> 00:16:12,474
but, uh, everything's good.
We're very happy.
383
00:16:12,541 --> 00:16:13,641
Well, great.
384
00:16:13,708 --> 00:16:15,209
It is great.
385
00:16:16,678 --> 00:16:19,278
Hey, Spence, why
aren't you mingling?
386
00:16:19,346 --> 00:16:21,247
What happened, you run
into miss Mancini?
387
00:16:21,314 --> 00:16:22,448
Was it awkward?
388
00:16:22,516 --> 00:16:24,382
No, but do you know
what is awkward?
389
00:16:24,450 --> 00:16:26,650
Your obsession with my sex life.
390
00:16:26,717 --> 00:16:27,917
Ooh, you got me.
391
00:16:27,985 --> 00:16:30,052
Yeah, I should take a good,
hard look at myself.
392
00:16:30,120 --> 00:16:31,154
Mmm-hmm. Yeah.
393
00:16:31,221 --> 00:16:32,470
But first,
394
00:16:32,538 --> 00:16:34,372
guess who just
walked in the door?
395
00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:37,874
She taught you Spanish,
then you tossed her paella.
396
00:16:40,211 --> 00:16:41,376
Job's going great.
397
00:16:41,444 --> 00:16:43,445
I mean, it couldn't be
going better, you know?
398
00:16:43,513 --> 00:16:45,713
Basically, I get
paid to wear shorts.
399
00:16:45,780 --> 00:16:46,914
That sounds great.
400
00:16:46,981 --> 00:16:48,481
It is great.
401
00:16:50,150 --> 00:16:52,883
♪
402
00:16:52,951 --> 00:16:54,018
Carrie.
403
00:16:54,086 --> 00:16:55,486
Hey, sweetie.
404
00:16:55,554 --> 00:16:57,088
Your hair's down.
What did you do?
405
00:16:57,155 --> 00:17:00,055
Yeah, well, I just
realized, you know,
406
00:17:00,123 --> 00:17:02,024
who cares who's right
about the bun?
407
00:17:02,092 --> 00:17:03,226
The point is,
408
00:17:03,293 --> 00:17:04,959
you didn't like it,
so it came down.
409
00:17:05,027 --> 00:17:07,828
You know, this is your night, and I
want to look good for my Dougie.
410
00:17:07,895 --> 00:17:08,929
Well, I love you.
411
00:17:08,996 --> 00:17:10,830
Come on, let's trot
you around the ring.
412
00:17:10,897 --> 00:17:13,031
All right, first off, I
want to introduce you
413
00:17:13,099 --> 00:17:16,334
to this little pinhead who
invented an insulin pump.
414
00:17:16,401 --> 00:17:17,401
Hey, check it out.
415
00:17:17,469 --> 00:17:19,102
Now Mancini's talking to
416
00:17:19,169 --> 00:17:20,570
miss berman, that
home ec teacher.
417
00:17:20,638 --> 00:17:22,705
I think she's trying to
make her way over to you.
418
00:17:22,772 --> 00:17:24,206
Yeah, you know what?
I'm gonna go.
419
00:17:24,274 --> 00:17:26,273
Oh, oh, too late. Here she comes.
Miss Mancini.
420
00:17:26,341 --> 00:17:28,041
Stop it. Come here.
421
00:17:29,310 --> 00:17:31,244
Remember me?
422
00:17:31,312 --> 00:17:33,411
Level 2 Spanish, repeated it.
423
00:17:33,479 --> 00:17:35,313
Danny Heffernan, right?
424
00:17:35,380 --> 00:17:38,015
Wow, that is some memory
you have there, yeah.
425
00:17:38,083 --> 00:17:40,115
Well, if you remember me, I...
I get the feeling
426
00:17:40,183 --> 00:17:42,985
you might remember
this young gentleman.
427
00:17:46,371 --> 00:17:48,589
I want to say Mark shine.
428
00:17:50,357 --> 00:17:51,591
Spence Olchin.
429
00:17:51,659 --> 00:17:54,092
Right. Right.
430
00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:56,311
Well, it's wonderful
to see you guys.
431
00:17:56,378 --> 00:17:57,762
Hasta luego.
432
00:17:59,281 --> 00:18:01,780
Oh, sorry, guy. You
had a good run.
433
00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:07,384
Oh, miss berman.
434
00:18:07,451 --> 00:18:09,953
You said you'd call
me, you bastard!
435
00:18:17,376 --> 00:18:19,376
♪
436
00:18:20,644 --> 00:18:25,614
♪ I know this much is true
437
00:18:25,682 --> 00:18:27,815
I'm just gonna move you a
couple steps to the left.
438
00:18:27,883 --> 00:18:29,717
Stu Gibbs is checking
out your ass,
439
00:18:29,785 --> 00:18:31,651
and I want him to get
the whole picture.
440
00:18:31,719 --> 00:18:33,720
All right, honey, can I
be off the clock now?
441
00:18:33,787 --> 00:18:35,020
You know what? You're right.
442
00:18:35,088 --> 00:18:36,855
I'm sorry, you've been a champ.
443
00:18:36,922 --> 00:18:39,657
Look, now that you've, uh, come
around to my side about the bun,
444
00:18:39,725 --> 00:18:42,892
maybe we could talk about retiring
that orange dress you always wear.
445
00:18:42,960 --> 00:18:45,528
My orange dress? You don't
like my orange dress?
446
00:18:45,596 --> 00:18:48,328
Not unless you're wearing
it as a hunting vest.
447
00:18:48,396 --> 00:18:51,164
You're a moron. That's
a versace knockoff.
448
00:18:51,232 --> 00:18:54,100
And f.Y.I., the only
reason I took the bun down
449
00:18:54,166 --> 00:18:56,101
is because Deacon said
he didn't like it.
450
00:18:56,168 --> 00:18:59,103
But thanks for weighing in, Mr.
Blackwell.
451
00:19:01,038 --> 00:19:02,205
You asked Deacon about this?
452
00:19:02,273 --> 00:19:03,873
Yeah. I asked him
if he liked my bun.
453
00:19:03,941 --> 00:19:05,974
He said, "no, it looked
bad." So I just went...
454
00:19:06,042 --> 00:19:07,276
Whoop!
455
00:19:07,344 --> 00:19:09,076
So l-l-let me get this straight.
456
00:19:09,144 --> 00:19:11,745
I, your husband, who you
theoretically love,
457
00:19:11,813 --> 00:19:13,280
beg you for 2 days to go
458
00:19:13,348 --> 00:19:14,647
whoop, and nothin',
459
00:19:14,715 --> 00:19:16,047
but then Deacon comes along and,
460
00:19:16,115 --> 00:19:18,016
"whoop, there it is"?
461
00:19:18,083 --> 00:19:19,834
That was the sequence
of events, yes.
462
00:19:19,902 --> 00:19:22,351
So where do I fall on this list
of people you do listen to?
463
00:19:22,419 --> 00:19:24,653
Because apparently, Deacon's
first, we know that.
464
00:19:24,721 --> 00:19:26,555
But then who? I mean,
guys in prison,
465
00:19:26,623 --> 00:19:28,789
you know, our insurance
agent, uh...
466
00:19:28,857 --> 00:19:30,124
Hey, you know what?
467
00:19:30,192 --> 00:19:31,925
I'm not gonna listen
to you or anyone else.
468
00:19:31,994 --> 00:19:34,694
I think the bun looks great,
so the hair is going back up.
469
00:19:34,761 --> 00:19:36,161
Hey, excuse me, folks.
470
00:19:36,229 --> 00:19:38,197
If I could just get everybody's
attention for a sec.
471
00:19:38,264 --> 00:19:39,830
Uh, as you all know,
472
00:19:39,898 --> 00:19:41,132
St. Gregory's has lost
473
00:19:41,200 --> 00:19:43,483
a beloved member of
its family recently,
474
00:19:43,551 --> 00:19:46,068
Mrs. palsgraf, our
school librarian.
475
00:19:46,136 --> 00:19:48,837
She's passed away after
22 years on the job.
476
00:19:48,904 --> 00:19:52,089
So, why don't we all
just take a brief moment
477
00:19:52,157 --> 00:19:54,091
and remember Mrs. p.
478
00:20:10,352 --> 00:20:12,220
What's up, palsgraf?
479
00:20:19,725 --> 00:20:22,660
♪
480
00:20:28,899 --> 00:20:32,700
♪ Take my breath away
481
00:20:38,971 --> 00:20:43,373
♪ take my breath away
33829
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.