All language subtitles for the michael j fox show s01e22 720p-skgtv

I still don't get
the ending to that movie.

The blind guy
and the dark-haired guy

were actually double agents.
Right.

And they were both working

for the bald guy
in the wheelchair.

No, the bald guy
in the wheelchair

was in a trailer for
a completely different movie.

I wondered why
he disappeared so early.

You're bad at movies.

Hey, why is there
a sock on our door?

Hey, guys!

Oh, I'm so sorry.

We really didn't know
that you were gonna be home.

Not like we were really
gonna get that far anyway.

I mean, it's a couch, right?
Second base, tops.

How was the movie?

Apparently not long enough.

Didn't you guys see the
sock on the doorknob?

You can't put a sock on the
door of an entire apartment.

It's supposed
to go on your room.

This isn't a frat house.

Let him have his fun.

I mean, you don't get a Ferrari
and keep it parked in the...

Why am I telling this
to a Lamborghini?

Well, I'm sure you guys are
tired and wanna get to bed.

Seriously?

Sure. We'll get
out of your hair.

Just be careful on that couch.
That's where we made Graham.

I thought we made Graham
at the Guggenheim.

Was that you?

Ripped By mstoll

Hey!

Last night was totally
humiliating, guys.

Deborah and I
need our own space.

I'm putting my
foot down on this.

Well, you're putting
your foot down

on our hardwood floors
in shoes we paid for.

If you get your own place,

people can't just
barge in on you.

Good morning!

Well, normal people.

The first printing
of my book is out.

I brought you all copies.

This is heavier
than a mother-frittata.

Ah, it smells so good.

These are all for us?
Thanks, Leigh.

No, thank you.
You're buying them.

Now let me go get the box

you're selling to your friends.

Come on, Mike,
let's get to work.

The new guy from
corporate is coming in.

Let's let the games begin.

Every once in a while,
the network sends down

one of these stooges
to check in on us.

Harris and I always
send 'em running.

Remember that one time
we convinced the guy

that the janitor was
the ambassador from Russia,

and then he put him on the air?

Yeah, to be fair, Randy
did a pretty good job

on Meet the Press.
Yeah.

Okay, so you guys just terrorize
these poor innocent men.

And women.
We don't discriminate.

Oh, hey, there,
Murder, She Wrote.

What's going on?

I'm going analog.
Ah.

I'm embracing the simple
life before computers.

I'm just gonna need a
calendar, pencil sharpener,

stamps, eraser, spiral
notebooks, dictionary...

Where's the box for Goodwill?

It's time I get
rid of this junk.

Oh, your junior detective kit.

You used to love this thing.

Dad was right. It's time
I get my own place.

What, really?

I mean, don't you think
that that's kinda sudden?

Well, I for one think that
this is a great move for you.

And a great move for me,

because once he's gone,

I can convert his old
room into a darkroom.

Film has so much
more depth than digital.

See? This one just
feels so much mo...

No, wait.

Hey, I'll help you
look for apartments.

We'll get you out
of this place in no time.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Okay, Ian, I will help you.

This is a big decision.

Mom, I can do this on my own.

But I could use some help
getting out of these handcuffs.

'Cause I just...

All right, so if you take
a look at these charts,

you'll see where I think the
ratings should be in about a year.

What do you see?

A blank chart?
You're damn right you do.

'Cause I think the ratings
should be off the charts.

Who's he talking to, his Call
of Duty buddies on Xbox?

Shh. I'm trying
to take notes.

On what? He's showing
us a blank chart.

Talking about...
Yeah, you got a question?

Yeah, Zack,
do you have any thoughts

on how to dimensionalize
the contextual fragmenting

of our news landscape?

That's a great question.
I get asked that a lot.

Let me get back
to it in a second.

That question
was complete gibberish.

Well, just because you don't
understand it doesn't mean he won't.

When you're talking about
an effective news team,

it's all about
attention, focus...

Yo?

They got bottle service there.

Where's Harris? He usually follows
up with a question in pig Latin.

Hey, Mike,
I can be Harris for you.

"Yo, you believe this jive turkey?
I mean, come on."

Just... Just stop.

Any questions?

Okay, I combed the internet,

and this place sounded
the most promising.

This is so exciting.

I can't wait to see my...

There's something
blocking the door.

And it's a toilet
with a burrito in it.

Which means there must be
a Mexican restaurant nearby.

Nice.

Well, you know, Ian,
this is what you can afford.

This is the best place
that I could find.

Actually,
it was the worst place.

I'm not ready
for him to move out yet.

Well, maybe the
bedroom's better.

Hey!
You've got some backups.

I bet half of those
don't even work.

Don't worry.
You know what?

We're gonna
find you a great place,

even if it takes us months.

Or years.

Come on, Harris.

This Zack clown
is easy pickings.

Let's do the bit
where we tell him

everything he says is racist.

That's racist.
You still got it.

Yeah.

Hey, sorry I left you hanging,

but I was working on something,

something I should
have told you sooner,

but I wasn't sure
how you'd take it.

I'm gonna propose to Leigh.

That bad, huh?

We're gonna be brothers.

I swear to God,
if she hurts you...

I'm gonna go big on this.

String quartet, rose petals.

I even got Graham learning
a little magic trick

to present the ring.

Graham knew before me?

Well, I...

Eh, let it go.
It's all happy.

Harris, yo, can we
rap for a second?

That's racist.

Oh, ho, my brother!

All right, come in there
in about five minutes.

We'll do what we did in '98.

Bad news.
Satellite's down.

We're gonna have to broadcast
the old-fashioned way.

Mike, it's not a great time.

That's okay, just hold
this as high as you can.

You may feel a couple of shocks,

but that just means
it's working.

Mike, I just got fired.

This isn't about
the satellite, is it?

Wait, I'm being told it's fixed.

I got the coaxial transponder.

No, no, not now, Doug.

Mother of God!

This whole thing is ridiculous...
They can't fire you.

You're the heart and
soul of the station.

It's terrible.

You should tell that to your
face, because it's smiling.

I'm sorry, it's just that...

Leigh and Harris
are gonna be engaged.

The work thing though,
that's bad.

It's really bad.
Bad, bad, bad.

Did you pick out
your colors yet?

I'm gonna go.

You know, I didn't
expect to get fired,

but I'm looking forward
to some downtime.

No, no, I'm getting
you your job back.

I'm going down there,
and I'm gonna give that punk

some buzz words of my own.

Oh, Mike, I'm fine, really.

Don't do anything rash.

What are they gonna do, fire me?
I don't care.

Harris, I've been
practicing my trick.

Pretend this is the ring.

Abracadabra!

Ta-da! What?

It was supposed to
turn into a rabbit.

Damn it, Graham,
that better not happen

when it's my grandmother's ring.

Is anybody else worried
about where this rabbit is?

I know what you're doing.
Ah!

I paid for your clothes.
I can wear them if I want to.

No, you're sabotaging
Ian's apartment hunt

because you don't
want him to move out.

Why do you care?
What's your angle?

Hey, guys.
Good morning!

Hey, buddy!

So, Mom,
turns out you were wrong.

I found an apartment
in my price range

where there wasn't
a murder recently,

and I'm gonna go
check it out right now.

Oh, honey, that's great.
I'm gonna come with you.

Me too.
Really?

Wow, thanks.
Really.

You guys are amazing.
Stop it...

Excuse me!

Harris, what are you doing here?

I thought we might
grab some brunch.

I wanted to talk to you
about something.

Oh, no can do.

I have a marketing meeting
with my publisher.

We're such a power couple.

Power couple, huh?
Yeah.

I'm a young, up-and-coming
literary phenom.

You're a sexy,
news-type guy.

I don't even really know
what your title is.

But we are firing
on all cylinders.

I love that about us.

Yeah, I love that too.

Mwah.
So, uh... Mwah.

Mmm.

We'll talk later.
Okay.

Sure. After work?

Yeah, work.

Um... Can't be late.

So I better go to work.

Bye.
Yeah, bye.

Oh, wait, you left your...

Oh, my God.

Oh, my...

He was gonna propose,
and I messed it up.

The one Tuesday
I don't go to brunch.

So what do you think?
Great kitchen.

It'll be so easy to organize.

You wanna put the things you
use the most at eye level,

which for me is soups.

It doesn't have to
be soups in your case.

I'm not saying don't have it be soups.
I'm just saying...

Are you even a soup guy?

There's so much
I don't know about you.

And now is not
the time to find out.

I'm gonna go
check out the bedroom.

This place is amazing, Ian.

It's got lots of natural light.

Yeah, you know,
maybe a little too much.

I mean, with Ian's
fair complexion,

it could be sunburn city.

Hey, now this... This is
a state-of-the-art feature.

Think about it, Ian. You
could do all of your ironing

for big, important
meetings right here.

Yeah, I'm not sure
that this is so safe.

I mean, this sucker could
just fly open out of nowhere,

hit Ian right in the
temple, and then, bam!

Before you know it, he's
got a little monkey helper

and he's sipping pudding
through a straw.

Oh, come on.
That's not gonna happen.

You guys, these closets...
Oh! Hunger Games!

This place is a death trap.

Mom, you were right.

All right, don't you mess with me.
I'm a master manipulator.

Do you remember two years ago

when you just decided
to go to summer school?

What are you talking about?

That was just my idea
to get some of those credits

out of the way while killing off

those idle summer months.

Yeah. Your idea.

Zack, we need to talk.

Hey, Mike.
Cop a squeezle.

"Squeezle" means "squat".

Yeah, I know
what squeezle means.

I've been squeezling squats
since before you were born.

I need to talk
to you about Harris.

"When in the course
of human events..."

Mike, Mike, I'm gonna
stop you right there.

Harris wasn't my call.

Okay, the ratings were down,

and the guys upstairs
just wanted me instead.

All that aside, I don't like the
direction this station's going.

Good, good, let's talk about it.
I'm here for a reason.

I'm here to showcase your abilities
as a hard-nosed journalist.

You're the smartest
guy here, easy.

I mean, this is just a fact.

Well, I wouldn't say that.

I mean, I do The New York Times
Saturday crossword puzzle

in seven minutes in ink,
but that's not why I'm here.

I hope you're here
to talk about your hair.

I don't wanna make this weird,

but I need to know something.

I need to know how
you got it so shiny.

Yeah, this old mop?

This guy was slick. It was clear he was
trying to deflect me with flattery,

but after 10 minutes,
I put my foot down.

It's just a store-bought
conditioner,

but the secret is to
use it every other day.

But back to the reason
why I'm here.

I think it was
Gandhi who said...

Mike, I wanna
make you lead anchor.

Susan's out, you're in.

Now, what was it
that Gandhi said?

Something about being flexible

and weighing all your options.

Hey, Harris.
Hey!

So how'd it go with Zack?

Well, I went to see him, and it

kinda got away from me.

Oh, my God,
you quit, didn't you?

Well...
Oh, it means

so much to me
that you'd do this.

How you holding up?

I've felt better.

Oh, come on, cheer up.

We're just a couple
of unemployed dudes

who get to spend
the day together.

Let's get brunch.
I can't.

Did I miss an article
about how brunch

is bad for you or something?

The thing is, I didn't quit.

Oh.

Good.

Just what I wanted.

I guess it's just
I'm unemployed, right?

What a relief.
Yay, Mike.

The funny thing is...
And this is a funny story.

Zack...

Made me anchor.

That is funny.
It is funny.

Yeah, I always
thought you were happy

being a correspondent, but okay.

Bright side? You can focus more
on your proposal to Leigh.

Well, actually, I'm gonna
hold off on that for a while.

I haven't even told her
I was fired yet.

Why not?

Because somebody basically said

they were gonna help me
get my job back.

But as I said,
that would have been

a foolish yet wonderful gesture.

You know?

Oh, thank you.

That's really nice.

Way to hook it up for a brother.

That's real nice of you.

Yep. Got it.

No, thank you.

Hey, sweetie.

Sorry we had to go toe-to-toe
on that Ian thing.

Hope you took it
as a learning experience.

Yep, you got me.

Somebody better call
child protective services,

because you just
beat your daughter.

Well, I'm gonna let you
enjoy that healthy snack

that you think you learned
to love on your own.

Oh. Got me again, Mom!

So are you ready
to show me that place?

Let's do this.

Hey, you. I wasn't
expecting you to drop by.

Now that I knew Harris
was gonna propose,

I wasn't gonna mess it up again,

but I didn't want
to tip him off.

So I had to play it cool.

Let's have a chat right now,

directly over here.

Is that a nanny cam? Why
are there three of them?

Yesterday you had something
important to tell me.

I changed my mind.

I screwed up again, didn't I?

I found the ring.

And I was gonna try to
make this perfect moment

for you to propose,
and this is the worst.

Look, I was gonna propose.

It's just...

I got fired two days ago.

Oh, sweetie.
You should've told me.

I know. I want to marry
you more than anything.

But...

I want it to be perfect.

But we're already perfect.

Harris Wright, will you make me

the luckiest girl in the world

and ask me to marry you?

Leigh Henry,

will you marry me?

Of course I will.

Oh, crap, wait.
Hold on.

Of course I will.

Hey, Susan, listen, I hope
there's no hard feelings.

Ah! I had a nightmare like this.

Oh, I am definitely a nightmare.

Since I have been demoted to
"Pet of the Week" segments,

Zack thought it was a great idea

to give me a warm
and friendly makeover.

There they are, my rock star
QB and the head cheerleader.

You guys psyched about the
new consultant I brought in?

America's Kathie Lee?
Sorry.

I was just washing out
a human bite.

Yeah, Susan was a little
resistant at first,

but then I shared
with her my secret

of how I stay so damn perky

no matter what tool
I'm talking to.

Box of rose?

You nailed it, Mike.
Stay informed.

I look like
Shirley freakin' Temple.

I'll go talk to her.

All right, come on,
babe. Consult.

Uh-huh.
Hey, listen, the higher-ups

are gonna be
watching tonight, Mike.

Okay, so you gotta
make me look good.

It already spoke volumes
that you were on board

with my decision
to get rid of Harris.

Wait a minute, your decision?
I thought it was them.

I lied.
Sorry.

I did it for you, though.

Come on, that guy
was dragging you down.

Don't make me say it.
I said it.

Let's just go do some news.

Boom. TV!

This place is amazing.

And so cheap.
How did you find it?

In the newspaper.

I started reading it
because, you know, analog.

The people who list there

have no idea
how much things cost now.

Another bonus,
built-in tie rack.

What?

Sorry I'm late.

How did you find us?

Junior detective kit.

Pretty useful.

Damn you, analog.

Did you really think that you
could get away with this,

you naive, little...

There's a bow tie rack too.

I'm taking it.
Great!

I'll go get the landlord.

And the student
becomes the master.

Look alive, people. Just
'cause you're not on camera

doesn't mean America
can't feel your energy.

Let's do this.
In five, four, three,

two, one.

This is NBC News 4 at 5:00.
I'm Mike Henry.

For the first time
in over 20 years,

someone other than Harris
counted me in.

The cause of the blaze
has yet to be determined.

And now a new segment
here on NBC 4,

"Pet of the Week," with former
anchor Susan Rodriguez Jones.

Thanks, Mike.

Today we're here with Snickers

to find this little sweetie
a new home.

Ah! Mother of...

Okay, he is clawed.

And volunteers caution
that he does not get along

with other animals...
Or children.

Or people.

Sounds like you two have
a lot in common, Susie.

It was the first time,
but also the last.

I was gonna throw the broadcast.

Hey, maybe you should adopt him,

seeing as you both have no one.

Hey, no...

Well, some of us
had to make sacrifices

for the career you stole, Mike.

Tell me this,
as a future cat lady...

Don't say that.

Does it give you comfort to know

that your cat will eat you
after you die alone?

All right, that's it.
I'm going after his hair.

Aah, don't touch the franchise!

The cat.
The cat!

Oh! Hey!
Don't you touch his hair!

Yeah! Come on, Mike. What?
You're insane.

Here, devil kitty, devil
kitty, here, devil kitty.

I should have left you
in that swamp!

Put that down!
Nice.

Bo to a break!
Are we on a break?

His claws
are digging into me!

This is a disaster.

It's a historic disaster.

What's the Hindenburg of the news world?
What would that be?

The Hindenburg.

Fast-forward to the part
where you punch the cat.

Obviously you're both fired.

And on top of that,
if you don't mind me...

Oh, I'm blowing up.

Yo, P-Money!
What's up, player?

Yeah, dawg.
Ha ha!

A'ight.
Yeah, yeah.

Word. I just got fired.

Oh, you don't get to
keep the headset?

You know, there
are people in this world

that build people up.

Then there are people in this
world that build people down.

And you, my friends,
are down-builders.

I shan't forget this.

Down-builders. I got to
hand it to you, Mike.

That was a really good plan.

Well, it wouldn't have worked

if you weren't such
a convincing sociopath.

Well, I didn't do it for you.

I was trying to get out
of my contract.

I got offered a job in China
to be their Connie Chung.

It's okay, it's okay.
It's okay.

We're good.
I got the cat.

That's not good.

Oh, dear Lord. Aah!
Oh, yeah!

Oh, I love it.

It's got kind of
an industrial feel.

See, she loves it.
We all love it.

So let's sign
that lease already.

Well, I have to admit.
This place has everything.

Although, Ian, are you
sure that you wanna live

all the way out here, so far
from the people that love you?

You know,
I hadn't thought of that.

No, no, no, no.

This place is great.
The toilet has its own room.

No, no, mom's right.

I should be around
people who love me.

I just want you to be happy.

And that's why I'm gonna
move in with Deborah.

That's...
What's that now?

Really?

That's great! I thought
you said it was too soon.

Well, I did,
but mom convinced me.

Ohh.
It's almost as if

this was her plan
from the beginning.

Well, you know, she is
the master manipulator.

Right?

Well, well, I miss one broadcast

and things go to hell
around here.

Well, sure, we all got fired,

but at least the cat
got adopted.

Hey, look,
I know what you guys did,

and thank you.

Well, zai jian.

I am off to Channel Wu.

Oh, no, hold up.

You guys aren't going anywhere.

The fight went viral.

It's the most attention this
broadcast has gotten in years.

NBC is thrilled.

Does that mean Zack's back?

Oh, no, he's gone.

You can't punch a cat.
That's unforgiveable.

Mike, you are back
in the anchor's chair.

Yes!
And so is Susan.

- You're doing it together.
- What?

You guys are a time bomb
that might go off any night.

My suggestion,
save it for sweeps.

Harris, she'll hold me down.

Ugh, that's what
anchors do, Mike.

"That's what
anchors do, Mike."

Ugh, there's that chemistry
we all love.

God, is that my golf trophy?

Yeah.

You almost went to China.

The only constant
in life is change.

To Harris and Leigh.

Keep your fights clean
and your sex to yourselves.

Gorgeous flowers, Harris.

Oh, well, I couldn't take back

some of the stuff that
I ordered for the proposal.

Hey, so that's the last of it.

Sometimes you don't get
the change you're hoping for.

Never thought
he'd be leaving this way.

Are you okay with this?
Yeah.

It's good. I mean, listen,
this is practically my idea.

Aw.

Where's the picture?

Oh, no, see, it takes a while.

I've got to expose
the negatives,

put it in the D-76, then
put it in the stop bath

and then the fixer, and
then let it dry for a day,

and then it'll be ready.

Why is that better?

It's not.

We better hit the road.

That's why you should
be grateful when you do.

Sit down already.

You ready?

But I for one am thrilled to have
the opportunity to find out.

That's why I'm excited
to announce

that I'll be sharing this news
desk with Susan Rodriguez Jones.

Snore. Are you
done yet, Michael?

Not by a long shot.