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[THEME - DIONNE WARWICK, "THE
LOVE BOAT THEME"]
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00:00:13,513 --> 00:00:14,264
THEME SONG: Love.
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00:00:17,517 --> 00:00:20,437
Love exciting and new.
4
00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:22,230
Come aboard.
5
00:00:25,483 --> 00:00:26,818
We're expecting you.
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00:00:28,945 --> 00:00:36,327
And love-- love is
life's sweetest reward.
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00:00:36,411 --> 00:00:41,291
Let it flow.
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00:00:41,374 --> 00:00:45,670
It floats back to you.
9
00:00:45,754 --> 00:00:49,174
The love boat.
10
00:00:49,257 --> 00:00:53,720
Soon we'll be
making another run.
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00:00:53,803 --> 00:01:01,644
The love boat promises
something for everyone.
12
00:01:01,728 --> 00:01:05,273
Set a course for adventure,
your mind on a new romance.
13
00:01:09,778 --> 00:01:17,660
And love-- love
won't hurt anymore.
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00:01:17,744 --> 00:01:26,127
It's an open smile
on a friendly shore.
15
00:01:26,211 --> 00:01:29,589
The love boat.
16
00:01:29,672 --> 00:01:33,676
Soon we'll be
making another run.
17
00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:36,429
Welcome aboard.
18
00:01:36,513 --> 00:01:37,472
It's love.
19
00:01:43,102 --> 00:01:44,020
Welcome aboard.
20
00:01:44,103 --> 00:01:45,063
It's love.
21
00:02:01,663 --> 00:02:03,289
Hello, wrestling fans.
22
00:02:03,373 --> 00:02:06,125
I'm Eddie Dumont here
aboard the Pacific Princess
23
00:02:06,209 --> 00:02:09,671
to cover the much touted grudge
match between Thomas "The
24
00:02:09,754 --> 00:02:12,382
Mangler" Sharkey and the
notorious Lover Boy Bob,
25
00:02:12,465 --> 00:02:16,344
and who better to give us the
color commentary than the one,
26
00:02:16,427 --> 00:02:18,221
the only Hulk Hogan?
27
00:02:18,304 --> 00:02:19,389
Any chance of getting you
in the ring tomorrow, Hulk?
28
00:02:19,472 --> 00:02:22,892
I wouldn't step in the ring
with those two dudes, man.
29
00:02:22,976 --> 00:02:25,478
I'm the World Wrestling
Federation heavyweight champion
30
00:02:25,562 --> 00:02:26,729
of the world, and I
only climb in the ring
31
00:02:26,813 --> 00:02:29,440
with top contenders.
32
00:02:29,524 --> 00:02:32,068
Well, you've heard it here
from the Hulk himself, ladies--
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00:02:32,151 --> 00:02:33,236
Wait a minute.
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00:02:33,319 --> 00:02:34,779
Let me get one thing straight
right from the start.
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00:02:34,863 --> 00:02:37,407
On this ship, I'm the only
professional wrestler on board,
36
00:02:37,490 --> 00:02:39,742
and I don't know who these
two skinny little wimps
37
00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:42,120
are running around, but they're
definitely not wrestlers.
38
00:02:42,203 --> 00:02:43,788
And they better
not get in my way,
39
00:02:43,872 --> 00:02:45,248
because I'm here to
stay, not to play,
40
00:02:45,331 --> 00:02:47,167
and I'm looking for a real
good time around here.
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00:02:51,921 --> 00:02:53,923
Thank you for that
color commentary, Hulk.
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00:02:54,007 --> 00:02:55,508
I can't believe
the cruise line would
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00:02:55,592 --> 00:02:56,426
sponsor a wrestling match.
44
00:02:56,509 --> 00:02:58,595
I mean, this stuff
is so ridiculous.
45
00:02:58,678 --> 00:02:59,596
Are you kidding?
46
00:02:59,679 --> 00:03:00,763
Haven't you ever seen a match?
47
00:03:00,847 --> 00:03:04,183
Me at a wrestling match?
48
00:03:04,267 --> 00:03:06,102
Vicki, please, think about it.
49
00:03:06,185 --> 00:03:07,395
Oh, come on.
50
00:03:07,478 --> 00:03:09,272
Let me tell you,
I saw Hulk Hogan
51
00:03:09,355 --> 00:03:11,816
get beaten with a folding chair
and still come back to win.
52
00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:13,610
You can't beat that
kind of action.
53
00:03:13,693 --> 00:03:14,819
EDDIE DUMONT: Here he is, ladies
and gentlemen, Lover Boy Bob.
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00:03:14,903 --> 00:03:17,739
Bob, please a word for the fans.
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00:03:17,822 --> 00:03:18,948
I've been waiting
for this match
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00:03:19,032 --> 00:03:21,451
ever since the Mangler put
my partner in a hospital
57
00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:22,660
with an illegal move.
58
00:03:22,744 --> 00:03:24,913
Hey, what's wrong
with an illegal move?
59
00:03:24,996 --> 00:03:27,206
You know, you gotta take the
good with the bad in this job,
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00:03:27,290 --> 00:03:28,291
sonny.
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00:03:28,374 --> 00:03:30,293
A kick to the head, a
short chop to the teeth--
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00:03:30,376 --> 00:03:33,546
that's OK, just as long as
they do it to you first.
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00:03:33,630 --> 00:03:36,132
It's payback time, and I'm
gonna mangle the Mangler.
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00:03:36,215 --> 00:03:38,635
You heard it here,
ladies and gentlemen.
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00:03:38,718 --> 00:03:41,054
This could be the
match of the century--
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00:03:41,137 --> 00:03:42,805
not counting any of
your matches, Hulk, sir.
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00:03:42,889 --> 00:03:46,059
Ah, there he is-- the Mangler.
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00:03:46,142 --> 00:03:47,769
What are your thoughts
on the match, Mangler?
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00:03:47,852 --> 00:03:49,812
I don't know what Lover
Boy's been telling you,
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00:03:49,896 --> 00:03:52,190
but my fans know, and
you know, Eddie, I'm here
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00:03:52,273 --> 00:03:55,485
to fight a clean fight, and
rip off this guy's head,
72
00:03:55,568 --> 00:03:56,569
and stuff it down his neck.
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00:03:56,653 --> 00:03:57,111
Yeah!
Come here!
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00:03:57,195 --> 00:03:57,695
Let's [inaudible].
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00:03:57,779 --> 00:03:59,822
Easy, moderators.
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00:04:04,327 --> 00:04:08,039
And we'll be here to
cover all the action on AWN,
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00:04:08,122 --> 00:04:09,374
the All Wrestling Network.
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00:04:13,670 --> 00:04:15,880
Oh, darn.
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00:04:15,964 --> 00:04:17,507
Did I miss the debates?
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00:04:17,590 --> 00:04:21,678
That colorful exchange of
philosophies and ideas?
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00:04:21,761 --> 00:04:22,804
Will you give me a break, sis?
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00:04:22,887 --> 00:04:23,304
We're advertising the match.
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00:04:29,769 --> 00:04:33,606
OK, Mr. Kants, that's
cabin 343, Aloha Deck.
84
00:04:33,690 --> 00:04:34,732
So my cousin finally
got to be a big shot?
85
00:04:34,816 --> 00:04:36,442
Oh, Gretchen.
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00:04:36,526 --> 00:04:37,944
Hi.
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00:04:38,027 --> 00:04:40,071
It's about time you broke
down and went on a cruise.
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00:04:40,154 --> 00:04:42,323
This is gonna be
one of the best.
89
00:04:42,407 --> 00:04:42,782
Oh, excellent weather?
90
00:04:42,865 --> 00:04:45,034
Excellent men.
91
00:04:45,118 --> 00:04:47,578
Judy, I love you, but if you
insist on upholding the family
92
00:04:47,662 --> 00:04:49,122
tradition of finding a
man for poor Gretchen,
93
00:04:49,205 --> 00:04:51,791
I'm getting off
this boat right now.
94
00:04:51,874 --> 00:04:53,042
OK, OK.
95
00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:55,628
It's my job to set
out the buffet.
96
00:04:55,712 --> 00:04:56,170
You decide what to sample.
97
00:04:56,254 --> 00:04:57,672
I mean it, Judy.
98
00:04:57,755 --> 00:05:00,967
I can still take you.
99
00:05:01,050 --> 00:05:02,552
- Welcome aboard.
- Hi, welcome aboard.
100
00:05:02,635 --> 00:05:03,261
Believe me, sir.
101
00:05:03,344 --> 00:05:03,886
This is a dynamite idea.
102
00:05:03,970 --> 00:05:05,263
Hello, welcome aboard.
103
00:05:05,346 --> 00:05:07,724
Hi, welcome aboard.
Sir, come on.
104
00:05:07,807 --> 00:05:08,766
This is a great idea.
105
00:05:08,850 --> 00:05:09,851
How can you say no
before you've even heard.
106
00:05:09,934 --> 00:05:11,144
All right, Gopher.
107
00:05:11,227 --> 00:05:12,729
Let's have it.
108
00:05:12,812 --> 00:05:15,231
OK, all right,
starting this cruise,
109
00:05:15,314 --> 00:05:19,736
we offer our passengers an
exciting new adventure--
110
00:05:19,819 --> 00:05:21,112
mystery port.
111
00:05:21,195 --> 00:05:22,280
Mystery port?
112
00:05:22,363 --> 00:05:24,991
As a special bonus, we
make a stop at a port that is
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00:05:25,074 --> 00:05:26,576
not on our regular itinerary.
114
00:05:26,659 --> 00:05:27,368
Forget it, Gopher.
115
00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:28,703
Oh, sir, come on.
116
00:05:28,786 --> 00:05:30,413
I'm just trying to liven
things up around here.
117
00:05:30,496 --> 00:05:33,166
I mean, aren't you tired
of doing the same old thing
118
00:05:33,249 --> 00:05:34,917
the same old way?
119
00:05:35,001 --> 00:05:36,085
Old?
120
00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:37,378
Well, I don't mean
you personally, sir.
121
00:05:37,462 --> 00:05:40,673
I mean, well, after all, there
may be snow on the mountain,
122
00:05:40,757 --> 00:05:42,008
but there's fire down below.
123
00:05:42,091 --> 00:05:43,551
You're right.
124
00:05:43,634 --> 00:05:45,595
A lot of that snow has
melted now, especially up here
125
00:05:45,678 --> 00:05:46,346
above the timber line.
126
00:05:46,429 --> 00:05:48,598
Gopher, go to your hole.
127
00:05:48,681 --> 00:05:49,348
OK.
128
00:06:25,676 --> 00:06:26,594
Too [inaudible].
129
00:06:26,677 --> 00:06:28,596
Too old.
130
00:06:28,679 --> 00:06:30,598
Too married.
131
00:06:30,681 --> 00:06:31,641
Judy, I don't get it.
132
00:06:31,724 --> 00:06:34,143
Your cousin Gretchen is
a very attractive woman.
133
00:06:34,227 --> 00:06:36,938
Why are you so worried that she
can't find a man on her own?
134
00:06:37,021 --> 00:06:38,481
Because she is so picky, Ace.
135
00:06:38,564 --> 00:06:39,899
All of her life
she's been looking
136
00:06:39,982 --> 00:06:41,943
for a guy who's a
cross between Tom
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00:06:42,026 --> 00:06:43,820
Selleck and Henry Kissinger.
138
00:06:43,903 --> 00:06:46,823
A hunk who can go
on "Nightline," huh?
139
00:06:46,906 --> 00:06:48,032
Any candidates?
140
00:06:48,116 --> 00:06:50,701
No, but I'm not gonna give up.
141
00:06:50,785 --> 00:06:51,786
Hey, Isaac.
142
00:06:51,869 --> 00:06:52,829
Hey, doc.
143
00:06:52,912 --> 00:06:54,497
Uh, I'd like a
club soda, please.
144
00:06:54,580 --> 00:06:55,832
Nathan, what would you like?
145
00:06:55,915 --> 00:06:56,165
I'll have the same thing.
146
00:06:56,249 --> 00:06:57,500
Thanks.
147
00:06:57,583 --> 00:06:57,834
OK.
148
00:06:57,917 --> 00:07:00,211
Hi.
149
00:07:00,294 --> 00:07:02,922
Enjoying the
cruise, mister, uh--
150
00:07:03,005 --> 00:07:03,756
Paul-- Nathan Paul.
151
00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:05,341
Yes, I'm having
a wonderful time.
152
00:07:05,424 --> 00:07:06,092
Thank you.
153
00:07:06,175 --> 00:07:07,301
Uh, Judy's our
cruise director.
154
00:07:07,385 --> 00:07:08,928
She'll see to it that you
have the time of your life.
155
00:07:09,011 --> 00:07:11,556
You bet I will.
156
00:07:11,639 --> 00:07:16,060
So, Mr. Paul, uh, what is
it you do for a living?
157
00:07:16,144 --> 00:07:17,687
I'm an author.
158
00:07:17,770 --> 00:07:18,521
Have I read any of your books?
159
00:07:18,604 --> 00:07:20,982
Not if you've gone
through puberty.
160
00:07:21,065 --> 00:07:22,275
I write children's books.
161
00:07:22,358 --> 00:07:23,317
Oh.
162
00:07:23,401 --> 00:07:24,944
But if you can't sleep
tonight, give me a call.
163
00:07:25,027 --> 00:07:27,238
I'll tell you a bedtime story.
164
00:07:27,321 --> 00:07:29,782
Well, there is one thing
I know about writers--
165
00:07:29,866 --> 00:07:31,117
they never get enough sun.
166
00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:34,328
So here we are,
prime sunny location.
167
00:07:34,412 --> 00:07:35,121
Gretchen.
168
00:07:35,204 --> 00:07:36,289
Gretchen, honey.
169
00:07:36,372 --> 00:07:37,331
What a surprise.
170
00:07:37,415 --> 00:07:40,251
Um, Gretchen, this
is Nathan Paul.
171
00:07:40,334 --> 00:07:42,378
Nathan Paul, my cousin,
Gretchen Summers.
172
00:07:42,461 --> 00:07:44,005
Hello.
173
00:07:44,088 --> 00:07:46,757
Nathan is a writer.
174
00:07:46,841 --> 00:07:48,926
Gretchen's a stockbroker.
175
00:07:49,010 --> 00:07:50,720
Fluent in three languages.
176
00:07:50,803 --> 00:07:53,347
Loves to ski.
177
00:07:53,431 --> 00:07:54,807
I'd like to stay and
play the dating game,
178
00:07:54,891 --> 00:07:56,058
but I've got to run.
179
00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:57,143
Nice to have met you, Nathan.
180
00:08:11,991 --> 00:08:15,578
Mind if I sit here.
181
00:08:15,661 --> 00:08:16,537
No.
182
00:08:16,621 --> 00:08:18,623
I mean, if you think
it's a good idea.
183
00:08:18,706 --> 00:08:21,292
Well, it's hard getting
a tan standing up.
184
00:08:21,375 --> 00:08:23,753
Just kind of ironic
with all the, uh,
185
00:08:23,836 --> 00:08:27,048
women around here you
decide to sit next to me.
186
00:08:27,131 --> 00:08:28,216
Well, it just looked
like a good place to sit.
187
00:08:28,299 --> 00:08:30,927
You don't know
who I am, do you?
188
00:08:31,010 --> 00:08:34,096
No, but I'm Bob.
189
00:08:34,180 --> 00:08:34,931
I'm Linda.
190
00:08:35,014 --> 00:08:36,891
There we go.
191
00:08:36,974 --> 00:08:39,894
You're Linda, and I'm Bob.
192
00:08:39,977 --> 00:08:41,270
"How to Talk to Anyone"--
193
00:08:41,354 --> 00:08:43,439
that's what you're reading?
194
00:08:43,522 --> 00:08:48,402
Yeah, um, I thought
it might help me out.
195
00:08:48,486 --> 00:08:49,445
Kind of shy.
196
00:08:49,528 --> 00:08:50,363
You're kidding.
197
00:08:50,446 --> 00:08:51,364
No.
198
00:08:51,447 --> 00:08:54,116
In fact, I'm running
out of things to say.
199
00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:56,452
Think you can give me a hand?
200
00:08:56,535 --> 00:08:57,245
Sure.
201
00:09:01,082 --> 00:09:02,291
Sure.
202
00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:03,876
WOMAN: Lift the right
twice, and then the left.
203
00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:05,878
Then the right.
204
00:09:05,962 --> 00:09:06,462
WOMAN: Starlight, keep
your knees together.
205
00:09:06,545 --> 00:09:08,631
It's a real '20s look.
206
00:09:08,714 --> 00:09:11,467
I will never be able to do
this new step for my solo.
207
00:09:11,550 --> 00:09:12,551
You have time, Starlight.
208
00:09:12,635 --> 00:09:15,846
Just keep at it.
209
00:09:15,930 --> 00:09:18,683
If you couldn't do
it, would they fire you?
210
00:09:18,766 --> 00:09:20,268
I mean, how would
they do that at sea?
211
00:09:20,351 --> 00:09:22,770
They make you swim home.
212
00:09:22,853 --> 00:09:25,982
Boy, they're strict.
213
00:09:26,065 --> 00:09:29,694
So with the right
[inaudible] left.
214
00:09:29,777 --> 00:09:31,821
You're getting sleepy.
215
00:09:31,904 --> 00:09:36,701
You feel your entire body
relaxing into a deep sleep.
216
00:09:36,784 --> 00:09:44,333
Ever more relaxed, ever more
sleepy, your mind is vacant.
217
00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:45,293
I don't, man.
218
00:09:45,376 --> 00:09:47,003
It seems all the captain
wants to do around
219
00:09:47,086 --> 00:09:49,171
here is run things by the book.
220
00:09:49,255 --> 00:09:50,298
I'll tell you this,
if I were the captain,
221
00:09:50,381 --> 00:09:52,591
I'd know how to jazz things up.
222
00:09:52,675 --> 00:09:53,342
Yeah, right.
223
00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:54,593
Say, who is that guy, anyway?
224
00:09:54,677 --> 00:09:58,180
Oh, that guy is the
Amazing Zimmerman.
225
00:09:58,264 --> 00:09:59,724
Judy hired him for the cruise.
226
00:09:59,807 --> 00:10:01,225
Well, what is he
doing, rehearsing
227
00:10:01,309 --> 00:10:03,477
or trying to get a date?
228
00:10:03,561 --> 00:10:04,895
You know, it hurts
me that you are
229
00:10:04,979 --> 00:10:07,940
not interested in listening
to your best friends spill
230
00:10:08,024 --> 00:10:11,319
his guts.
231
00:10:11,402 --> 00:10:13,654
I'm sorry.
232
00:10:13,738 --> 00:10:16,574
Listen, as far as the captain
is concerned, if I were you,
233
00:10:16,657 --> 00:10:18,868
I would cool it with the
bright ideas for a while.
234
00:10:18,951 --> 00:10:20,995
He still chokes when
anyone mentions the idea
235
00:10:21,078 --> 00:10:21,954
you had about the kitty casino.
236
00:10:22,038 --> 00:10:22,872
[phone ringing]
237
00:10:22,955 --> 00:10:27,043
Excuse me.
238
00:10:27,126 --> 00:10:28,586
Lido bar.
239
00:10:28,669 --> 00:10:32,048
You're getting
more and more sleepy.
240
00:10:32,131 --> 00:10:34,633
You are drifting to a
level of consciousness
241
00:10:34,717 --> 00:10:38,471
where no man has
ever gone before.
242
00:10:38,554 --> 00:10:42,516
Your mind is a magic
slate, an empty blackboard
243
00:10:42,600 --> 00:10:45,061
devoid of thought, purpose.
244
00:10:45,144 --> 00:10:48,856
I am in control.
245
00:10:48,939 --> 00:10:53,069
And now, if you're completely
relaxed, twitch your nose.
246
00:10:55,821 --> 00:10:58,991
And now you will do the very
next thing you're told to do.
247
00:10:59,075 --> 00:11:04,580
If you understand this, give
the Amazing Zimmerman a nod.
248
00:11:04,663 --> 00:11:06,624
I've bad news, Amazing.
249
00:11:06,707 --> 00:11:07,875
What?
250
00:11:07,958 --> 00:11:09,377
I'm not hypnotized.
251
00:11:09,460 --> 00:11:10,211
Really?
252
00:11:10,294 --> 00:11:11,796
How about dinner?
253
00:11:16,717 --> 00:11:18,010
All right, where were we?
254
00:11:18,094 --> 00:11:19,678
Oh, yes.
255
00:11:19,762 --> 00:11:22,890
You were spilling your guts.
256
00:11:22,973 --> 00:11:29,772
You know, I'd like to see
you try and be the captain.
257
00:11:29,855 --> 00:11:31,732
Excuse me, sailor.
258
00:11:31,816 --> 00:11:32,733
I've got a ship to run.
259
00:11:41,158 --> 00:11:42,368
You know me, Eddie.
260
00:11:42,451 --> 00:11:44,954
I train hard, and I take
good care of myself.
261
00:11:45,037 --> 00:11:48,749
And if Lover Boy thinks he's
gonna try his grip of death
262
00:11:48,833 --> 00:11:50,918
on me, this is what
I'm gonna to do to him.
263
00:11:55,589 --> 00:11:57,967
Oh, Nelly.
264
00:11:58,050 --> 00:12:00,136
Did you see that, fans?
265
00:12:00,219 --> 00:12:01,637
Don't miss the action--
266
00:12:01,721 --> 00:12:07,309
the Mangler versus Lover Boy on
AWN, the All Wrestling Network.
267
00:12:07,393 --> 00:12:09,728
OK, that was good.
268
00:12:09,812 --> 00:12:10,479
Beautiful.
269
00:12:10,563 --> 00:12:11,313
Thanks, champ.
270
00:12:11,397 --> 00:12:13,023
Hey, Mangler.
271
00:12:13,107 --> 00:12:13,983
How's it going?
272
00:12:14,066 --> 00:12:15,568
Hi, guys.
273
00:12:15,651 --> 00:12:16,610
How you doing, sis?
274
00:12:16,694 --> 00:12:21,031
OK, guess who I
just spent time with?
275
00:12:21,115 --> 00:12:22,533
Lover Boy Bob.
276
00:12:22,616 --> 00:12:23,492
Stay away from that jerk.
277
00:12:23,576 --> 00:12:25,661
- Will you take it easy?
- No.
278
00:12:25,744 --> 00:12:26,328
No sister of mine's
gonna hang around
279
00:12:26,412 --> 00:12:28,581
with an animal like that.
280
00:12:28,664 --> 00:12:31,000
He happens to be
a very sweet man.
281
00:12:31,083 --> 00:12:32,543
Did you know that he's
actually very shy?
282
00:12:32,626 --> 00:12:34,628
We had a really nice talk.
283
00:12:34,712 --> 00:12:35,713
I mean, he doesn't even
know I'm your sister.
284
00:12:35,796 --> 00:12:36,464
I mean it.
285
00:12:36,547 --> 00:12:38,174
Stay away from him.
286
00:12:38,257 --> 00:12:40,050
I don't want you to we
one of Lover Boy's bimbos.
287
00:12:40,134 --> 00:12:43,971
I'm a big girl now, and I can
take care of myself, thank you.
288
00:13:00,279 --> 00:13:01,489
You have good taste.
289
00:13:01,572 --> 00:13:02,448
Oh, you've got it?
290
00:13:02,531 --> 00:13:03,324
Twice.
291
00:13:03,407 --> 00:13:04,325
It must be good.
292
00:13:04,408 --> 00:13:05,117
Trust me.
293
00:13:35,606 --> 00:13:36,398
I'm sorry, Goph.
294
00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:37,483
[inaudible] that, sailor.
295
00:13:37,566 --> 00:13:38,275
What?
296
00:13:41,028 --> 00:13:46,575
What you mean to
say is I'm sorry, sir!
297
00:13:46,659 --> 00:13:47,409
Right.
298
00:13:47,493 --> 00:13:50,746
I'm sorry, sir.
299
00:13:50,829 --> 00:13:51,539
Whoa.
300
00:13:53,958 --> 00:13:57,002
I'm going to have to put
that young man on report.
301
00:14:01,549 --> 00:14:05,261
Why do I have all these keys?
302
00:14:05,344 --> 00:14:07,346
Because I'm the captain.
303
00:14:07,429 --> 00:14:08,013
Captains need keys.
304
00:14:39,753 --> 00:14:41,130
Doc, I've been looking
all over for you.
305
00:14:41,213 --> 00:14:42,631
Gopher is acting strange.
306
00:14:42,715 --> 00:14:43,132
Yeah, what else is new?
307
00:14:43,215 --> 00:14:43,924
Doc!
308
00:14:48,596 --> 00:14:49,930
Let the games begin.
309
00:14:53,058 --> 00:14:55,477
Good evening.
310
00:14:55,561 --> 00:14:56,145
You're right.
311
00:14:56,228 --> 00:15:00,024
He is stranger than usual.
312
00:15:00,107 --> 00:15:02,192
Good evening.
313
00:15:02,276 --> 00:15:03,986
Good evening.
314
00:15:04,069 --> 00:15:08,490
On behalf of the captain, me,
I want to wish you bon appetit.
315
00:15:08,574 --> 00:15:09,658
You know what that means?
316
00:15:09,742 --> 00:15:11,660
It's French for good appetite.
317
00:15:11,744 --> 00:15:13,829
I speak French because
I'm the captain.
318
00:15:17,041 --> 00:15:19,585
I met the captain
when we came aboard.
319
00:15:19,668 --> 00:15:21,295
That's not him.
320
00:15:21,378 --> 00:15:23,922
Maybe he's the,
uh, night captain.
321
00:15:24,006 --> 00:15:24,757
Evening.
322
00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:25,716
Good evening.
323
00:15:25,799 --> 00:15:26,467
Gopher.
324
00:15:26,550 --> 00:15:27,009
Evening.
325
00:15:27,092 --> 00:15:28,052
What are you doing?
326
00:15:28,135 --> 00:15:30,721
You will address me as
captain or sir, mister,
327
00:15:30,804 --> 00:15:32,014
or you will not
address me at all.
328
00:15:32,097 --> 00:15:34,516
All right, Gopher, you've
had your little joke.
329
00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:36,310
Stop pretending
to be the captain.
330
00:15:36,393 --> 00:15:38,228
This is gross insubordination.
331
00:15:38,312 --> 00:15:39,521
I want your commission.
332
00:15:41,899 --> 00:15:43,734
You can our commissions
later, but right now
333
00:15:43,817 --> 00:15:45,736
you're wanted on the bridge.
334
00:15:45,819 --> 00:15:48,572
Oh, well, the bridge--
that's different.
335
00:15:48,656 --> 00:15:49,782
Leaving so soon, gentlemen.
336
00:15:49,865 --> 00:15:51,367
We just thought we'd take
a little stroll around deck
337
00:15:51,450 --> 00:15:52,159
before dinner.
338
00:15:55,996 --> 00:15:57,081
I'm sorry, Linda.
339
00:15:57,164 --> 00:15:59,667
This'll just take a minute.
340
00:15:59,750 --> 00:16:01,752
Hey, dog face, have some
consideration and leave.
341
00:16:01,835 --> 00:16:02,628
I mean, people are
trying to eat here.
342
00:16:02,711 --> 00:16:03,629
You can close the big mouth.
343
00:16:03,712 --> 00:16:05,714
I want to talk to my sister.
344
00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:06,507
Sister?
345
00:16:08,717 --> 00:16:11,512
You're the Mangler's sister?
346
00:16:11,595 --> 00:16:13,263
I was gonna
mention that later.
347
00:16:13,347 --> 00:16:15,766
I told you I don't want
you anywhere near this guy.
348
00:16:15,849 --> 00:16:18,310
And I told you I will
see whoever I want.
349
00:16:18,394 --> 00:16:20,396
Look, Linda, I've
always looked after you.
350
00:16:20,479 --> 00:16:21,855
Guys like this are bad news.
351
00:16:21,939 --> 00:16:23,565
Hey, you want to
say that to my face?
352
00:16:23,649 --> 00:16:25,025
Bob, this is between
my brother and me.
353
00:16:25,109 --> 00:16:28,112
He doesn't seem to think I
can have a life of my own.
354
00:16:28,195 --> 00:16:29,571
Hey, listen, if I'm
just here to prove
355
00:16:29,655 --> 00:16:31,156
your independence
to your brother,
356
00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:32,741
well, you can find someone else.
357
00:16:37,871 --> 00:16:39,957
All right, I want some
answers, and I want them now.
358
00:16:40,040 --> 00:16:41,458
What was the rush
to have me examined?
359
00:16:41,542 --> 00:16:43,919
Well, you due for you--
360
00:16:44,002 --> 00:16:46,088
Sir, you were due for
your annual physical today,
361
00:16:46,171 --> 00:16:48,841
and I couldn't rest
knowing I let the day
362
00:16:48,924 --> 00:16:51,427
go by without doing my job.
363
00:16:51,510 --> 00:16:52,761
So how am I?
364
00:16:52,845 --> 00:16:53,721
Nutty ass--
365
00:16:53,804 --> 00:16:55,889
Sound as a dollar.
366
00:16:55,973 --> 00:16:57,307
Good.
367
00:16:57,391 --> 00:16:58,767
In that case, I'll
put on my jacket
368
00:16:58,851 --> 00:17:00,436
and be about my business.
369
00:17:00,519 --> 00:17:02,354
Doc, what's wrong with him?
370
00:17:02,438 --> 00:17:04,773
Beats me.
371
00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:06,942
Maybe Gopher's had--
372
00:17:07,025 --> 00:17:10,612
Gopher's had a
nervous breakdown.
373
00:17:10,696 --> 00:17:12,406
In any case, I'd
better tell the captain.
374
00:17:12,489 --> 00:17:13,365
Well, you can't.
375
00:17:13,449 --> 00:17:17,369
If the c-- captain
finds out about this--
376
00:17:17,453 --> 00:17:18,746
he's already on Gopher's case--
377
00:17:18,829 --> 00:17:20,038
it'll be the last straw.
378
00:17:20,122 --> 00:17:22,750
Now, that may be, but I can't
let him roam around like this.
379
00:17:26,211 --> 00:17:28,547
I'll give him a mild sedative.
380
00:17:28,630 --> 00:17:29,798
Good.
381
00:17:29,882 --> 00:17:31,592
Maybe when he wakes
up in the morning,
382
00:17:31,675 --> 00:17:32,468
he'll be his old self again.
383
00:17:36,263 --> 00:17:36,889
I don't know.
384
00:17:36,972 --> 00:17:37,890
Maybe we should aim higher.
385
00:17:45,439 --> 00:17:50,444
Well, looks like we've been
seated at the same table.
386
00:17:50,527 --> 00:17:51,945
What a nice surprise.
387
00:17:52,029 --> 00:17:54,656
It's very nice, but
hardly a surprise.
388
00:17:54,740 --> 00:17:57,117
I'm sure this is Judy's doing.
389
00:17:57,201 --> 00:17:59,828
Look, Nathan, I think you
deserve an explanation.
390
00:17:59,912 --> 00:18:03,332
Judy's my cousin, and apparently
she's devoting every waking
391
00:18:03,415 --> 00:18:05,584
hour to finding a man for me.
392
00:18:05,667 --> 00:18:08,003
Well, you don't seem the
type that would need any help.
393
00:18:08,086 --> 00:18:10,380
I'm not, but
everyone in my family
394
00:18:10,464 --> 00:18:12,800
is concerned that, if I
don't settle down soon,
395
00:18:12,883 --> 00:18:15,344
all the good men will be gone.
396
00:18:15,427 --> 00:18:17,429
I'll be stuck with a rebounder.
397
00:18:17,513 --> 00:18:18,514
I know what you mean.
398
00:18:18,597 --> 00:18:19,723
My family is worried that,
if I don't get married,
399
00:18:19,807 --> 00:18:21,266
I'm not gonna eat right.
400
00:18:21,350 --> 00:18:26,688
Sometimes I wish I could cross
my fingers, and wiggle one ear,
401
00:18:26,772 --> 00:18:29,942
and make whoever I
choose disappear.
402
00:18:30,025 --> 00:18:33,862
That's from my book,
"The Runaway Frog."
403
00:18:33,946 --> 00:18:34,571
You read it?
404
00:18:34,655 --> 00:18:36,657
I couldn't put it down.
405
00:18:36,740 --> 00:18:39,076
But that-- that's
a children's book.
406
00:18:39,159 --> 00:18:43,664
Well, I read it in the
privacy of my own cabin.
407
00:18:43,747 --> 00:18:46,583
I'm really touched.
408
00:18:46,667 --> 00:18:48,001
So what do you think?
409
00:18:48,085 --> 00:18:49,211
Nathan, it's a
children's book.
410
00:18:49,294 --> 00:18:49,711
I'm not an expert in the field.
411
00:18:49,795 --> 00:18:51,547
Sure you are.
412
00:18:51,630 --> 00:18:53,257
You were a kid
once, weren't you?
413
00:18:53,340 --> 00:18:53,715
Go on, be brutal.
414
00:18:53,799 --> 00:18:55,884
All right.
415
00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:58,679
Well, OK, it's better
than "The Poky Little
416
00:18:58,762 --> 00:19:02,099
Puppy," but not quite on a
par with "The Little Engine
417
00:19:02,182 --> 00:19:02,933
That Could."
418
00:19:27,499 --> 00:19:28,208
I, um--
419
00:19:32,129 --> 00:19:36,133
I wanted to apologize for what
happened at dinner tonight.
420
00:19:36,216 --> 00:19:36,884
You were right.
421
00:19:36,967 --> 00:19:38,719
I, uh, was using you.
422
00:19:38,802 --> 00:19:41,763
Oh, I-- I feel better.
423
00:19:41,847 --> 00:19:44,266
Before I just
thought I was a fool.
424
00:19:44,349 --> 00:19:45,434
Now I know it.
425
00:19:45,517 --> 00:19:46,935
No, you're not.
426
00:19:47,019 --> 00:19:49,104
Bob, I really like you, and
that's why I didn't tell you
427
00:19:49,187 --> 00:19:50,939
who I was when we
first met, because I
428
00:19:51,023 --> 00:19:53,358
didn't want to spoil things.
429
00:19:53,442 --> 00:19:55,360
Didn't think the
family would approve.
430
00:19:55,444 --> 00:19:57,154
Will you forget
about my brother?
431
00:19:57,237 --> 00:20:00,240
I wanted to see you
again because, well,
432
00:20:00,324 --> 00:20:03,869
you're not at all the way
you appear to be on TV.
433
00:20:06,705 --> 00:20:08,582
I like you a lot.
434
00:20:12,044 --> 00:20:13,170
You mean that?
435
00:20:13,253 --> 00:20:15,631
Yeah.
436
00:20:15,714 --> 00:20:18,342
Why else would I come
crawling back here
437
00:20:18,425 --> 00:20:20,135
and ask you to go dancing?
438
00:20:20,218 --> 00:20:21,303
I got it.
439
00:20:21,386 --> 00:20:23,096
You're trying to tire me
out before the big match.
440
00:20:23,180 --> 00:20:25,933
We'll only dance
the slow ones.
441
00:20:29,811 --> 00:20:31,313
6, 7, 8.
442
00:20:31,396 --> 00:20:32,606
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8.
443
00:20:32,689 --> 00:20:34,316
That's right.
444
00:20:34,399 --> 00:20:35,484
You got it.
445
00:20:35,567 --> 00:20:36,401
Good.
446
00:20:36,485 --> 00:20:37,361
I can do it with my fingers.
447
00:20:37,444 --> 00:20:39,863
Now if I could only
do it with my feet.
448
00:20:39,947 --> 00:20:42,574
Oh, you'll do it.
449
00:20:42,658 --> 00:20:45,327
I still feel badly about
walking out on the hypnotist,
450
00:20:45,410 --> 00:20:47,204
but I swear the only reason
the subject fell asleep
451
00:20:47,287 --> 00:20:50,749
was because she got tired
of watching his act.
452
00:20:50,832 --> 00:20:52,209
I really enjoyed this evening.
453
00:20:52,292 --> 00:20:54,252
So have I.
454
00:20:54,336 --> 00:20:57,506
Well, I guess I ought to
thank Judy for doing a good job.
455
00:20:57,589 --> 00:21:00,425
Well, the, uh, $10 I slipped
her to put me to the top
456
00:21:00,509 --> 00:21:02,177
of the list ought to help.
457
00:21:02,260 --> 00:21:03,553
Would you like to dance?
458
00:21:03,637 --> 00:21:04,346
OK.
459
00:21:10,269 --> 00:21:10,811
Maybe when I do--
460
00:21:10,894 --> 00:21:12,521
Uh, excuse me.
461
00:21:12,604 --> 00:21:13,855
I just checked the infirmary.
462
00:21:13,939 --> 00:21:15,983
Gopher's gone.
463
00:21:16,066 --> 00:21:18,527
Well, maybe he woke
up, remembered who he
464
00:21:18,610 --> 00:21:19,820
is, and went back to his cabin.
465
00:21:19,903 --> 00:21:21,363
GOPHER [ON INTERCOM]:
Attention all passengers.
466
00:21:21,446 --> 00:21:22,823
Attention all passenger.
467
00:21:22,906 --> 00:21:24,199
Tomorrow after the
wrestling match,
468
00:21:24,282 --> 00:21:27,244
we'll be stopping
at our mystery port.
469
00:21:27,327 --> 00:21:28,370
Here's a clue.
470
00:21:28,453 --> 00:21:31,373
This port's government is
about to be overthrown.
471
00:21:31,456 --> 00:21:33,792
The smoking lamp is now lit.
472
00:21:33,875 --> 00:21:34,626
I think we'd better find him.
473
00:21:34,710 --> 00:21:36,545
Excuse me.
474
00:21:36,628 --> 00:21:37,379
Excuse us.
475
00:21:57,065 --> 00:21:58,692
LOVER BOY BOB: Look
at this spread.
476
00:21:58,775 --> 00:22:00,068
There you go.
What do you want?
477
00:22:00,152 --> 00:22:00,902
I wonder what I want.
478
00:22:00,986 --> 00:22:01,737
I want a kiwi.
479
00:22:01,820 --> 00:22:03,363
All right.
480
00:22:03,447 --> 00:22:03,739
Here you go.
481
00:22:03,822 --> 00:22:06,992
One kiwi.
482
00:22:07,075 --> 00:22:07,743
You know I used to wear
a hood in the ring?
483
00:22:07,826 --> 00:22:09,536
Yeah?
484
00:22:09,619 --> 00:22:11,079
Yeah, but I
passed out one night
485
00:22:11,163 --> 00:22:12,205
because I couldn't breathe.
486
00:22:12,289 --> 00:22:16,585
I mean, it was so embarrassing.
487
00:22:16,668 --> 00:22:17,627
[inaudible]
488
00:22:17,711 --> 00:22:18,587
Great.
489
00:22:18,670 --> 00:22:20,672
He must have radar.
490
00:22:20,756 --> 00:22:21,590
I'll handle this.
491
00:22:21,673 --> 00:22:23,133
I want to talk to you.
492
00:22:23,216 --> 00:22:24,134
Listen, Thomas.
493
00:22:24,217 --> 00:22:25,594
Your sister's with
me because she wants
494
00:22:25,677 --> 00:22:26,678
to be with me, so butt out.
495
00:22:26,762 --> 00:22:28,430
Well, my fight's not
with my sister anymore.
496
00:22:28,513 --> 00:22:29,389
It's with you.
497
00:22:29,473 --> 00:22:30,932
When we step in that
ring this afternoon,
498
00:22:31,016 --> 00:22:32,434
I'm gonna end your
career permanently.
499
00:22:32,517 --> 00:22:33,602
Come on, Jimmy.
500
00:22:33,685 --> 00:22:35,312
Let's get this on tape.
501
00:22:35,395 --> 00:22:36,855
Shut up, Eddie.
502
00:22:36,938 --> 00:22:38,982
You wouldn't talk to me like
that if the Hulkster was here.
503
00:22:39,066 --> 00:22:39,941
Is this a blood feud?
504
00:22:40,025 --> 00:22:42,194
Are you two in love?
505
00:22:42,277 --> 00:22:43,278
I don't understand.
506
00:22:43,361 --> 00:22:46,490
You usually get these
step right away.
507
00:22:46,573 --> 00:22:48,283
But it's the Charleston.
508
00:22:48,366 --> 00:22:51,787
It's a '20s number, and
I have an '80s body.
509
00:22:51,870 --> 00:22:52,412
You'll be fine.
510
00:22:52,496 --> 00:22:54,748
We'll work with you.
511
00:22:54,831 --> 00:22:56,375
We're your friends,
and we care about you.
512
00:23:00,796 --> 00:23:01,838
Morning, Gretchen.
513
00:23:01,922 --> 00:23:04,299
Hi.
514
00:23:04,382 --> 00:23:06,968
Well, you and
Nathan seemed to be
515
00:23:07,052 --> 00:23:09,179
enjoying yourselves last night.
516
00:23:09,262 --> 00:23:11,264
Last night was wonderful.
517
00:23:11,348 --> 00:23:14,142
Nathan's everything I've
ever looked for in a man.
518
00:23:14,226 --> 00:23:16,645
Then everything's
working out, right?
519
00:23:16,728 --> 00:23:21,483
Well, unfortunately it's a
day late and a dollar short.
520
00:23:21,566 --> 00:23:23,151
Why?
521
00:23:23,235 --> 00:23:28,782
You see, two months
ago I turned 30.
522
00:23:28,865 --> 00:23:31,159
It's one of those
milestone birthdays
523
00:23:31,243 --> 00:23:33,203
where you kind of take
stock of yourself,
524
00:23:33,286 --> 00:23:33,995
and it was depressing.
525
00:23:34,079 --> 00:23:36,289
Why, because you're all alone?
526
00:23:36,373 --> 00:23:37,499
Mm-hm.
527
00:23:37,582 --> 00:23:39,209
I always expected
to have a career
528
00:23:39,292 --> 00:23:41,586
and still be able to have
a husband and children,
529
00:23:41,670 --> 00:23:44,423
but the right guy
never came along.
530
00:23:44,506 --> 00:23:47,008
And then I realized that,
if I waited until I was 35
531
00:23:47,092 --> 00:23:50,178
to have my first child,
I'd be 53 before she
532
00:23:50,262 --> 00:23:51,221
graduated from high school.
533
00:23:51,304 --> 00:23:52,597
And then by the
time my kid finished
534
00:23:52,681 --> 00:23:57,018
college and med school, I'd
be old enough for Medicare.
535
00:23:57,102 --> 00:24:00,188
Well, Gretchen, what
are you gonna do about it?
536
00:24:00,272 --> 00:24:02,482
I've already done it.
537
00:24:02,566 --> 00:24:04,192
I'm six weeks pregnant.
538
00:24:04,276 --> 00:24:05,694
Oh my god.
539
00:24:05,777 --> 00:24:08,530
Um, maybe we should
go someplace where you
540
00:24:08,613 --> 00:24:09,656
can lie down, and I'll explain.
541
00:24:17,998 --> 00:24:20,542
Well, did you find him?
542
00:24:20,625 --> 00:24:21,877
I looked everywhere.
543
00:24:21,960 --> 00:24:23,336
I even checked his make out nest
in the boiler room-- nothing.
544
00:24:23,420 --> 00:24:25,046
Well, I'd better
tell the captain.
545
00:24:25,130 --> 00:24:29,384
Uh, doc, please, hold off.
546
00:24:29,467 --> 00:24:30,677
I know I can find it.
547
00:24:30,760 --> 00:24:31,678
Well--
548
00:24:31,761 --> 00:24:32,471
Thanks.
549
00:24:35,307 --> 00:24:38,185
Adam, Gopher has
gone too far this time.
550
00:24:38,268 --> 00:24:39,102
What's he done now?
551
00:24:39,186 --> 00:24:40,395
That announcement
he made last night.
552
00:24:40,478 --> 00:24:42,898
I don't like members
of my crew making
553
00:24:42,981 --> 00:24:45,066
what they consider
jokes over the ship's
554
00:24:45,150 --> 00:24:46,610
public address system.
555
00:24:46,693 --> 00:24:47,444
Uh, captain?
556
00:24:47,527 --> 00:24:48,195
Yes?
557
00:24:48,278 --> 00:24:49,571
Would you please explain this?
558
00:24:49,654 --> 00:24:50,238
What is it?
559
00:24:50,322 --> 00:24:51,406
It's a loyalty oath.
560
00:24:51,489 --> 00:24:52,741
The entire crew got one.
561
00:24:52,824 --> 00:24:54,534
Well, I didn't send
any of these out.
562
00:24:54,618 --> 00:24:56,870
Well, your signature's on it.
563
00:24:56,953 --> 00:24:59,080
That's not my signature.
564
00:24:59,164 --> 00:25:01,374
I always put a little
happy face inside my B.
565
00:25:01,458 --> 00:25:02,667
Oh, yeah.
566
00:25:02,751 --> 00:25:04,920
I want a meeting
in my office right
567
00:25:05,003 --> 00:25:07,797
after the wrestling match.
568
00:25:07,881 --> 00:25:08,757
Well, he's ticked off now.
569
00:25:08,840 --> 00:25:11,092
Mm.
570
00:25:11,176 --> 00:25:12,594
GOPHER [ON INTERCOM]: Ladies and
gentlemen, this is the captain.
571
00:25:12,677 --> 00:25:14,012
I'd like to remind
you that the wrestling
572
00:25:14,095 --> 00:25:15,513
match is about to begin.
573
00:25:15,597 --> 00:25:18,934
No one will be seated
after the first round,
574
00:25:19,017 --> 00:25:22,938
except me, because
I'm the captain.
575
00:25:23,021 --> 00:25:24,648
EDDIE DUMONT: Fans, we've
had the introductions.
576
00:25:24,731 --> 00:25:26,900
We are seconds away from
a match that's shaping
577
00:25:26,983 --> 00:25:28,193
up to be a real blood feud.
578
00:25:28,276 --> 00:25:29,194
Hulk, could you give
us an in depth analysis
579
00:25:29,277 --> 00:25:31,488
of these two fine competitors.
580
00:25:31,571 --> 00:25:33,782
Yeah, this macho man,
Lover Boy, is so skinny
581
00:25:33,865 --> 00:25:36,284
he makes Boy George
look like Superman.
582
00:25:36,368 --> 00:25:38,411
And as far as the
Mangler goes, he's just
583
00:25:38,495 --> 00:25:39,871
plain scared of his own shadow.
584
00:25:39,955 --> 00:25:41,164
EDDIE DUMONT: Thank you, Hulk.
585
00:25:41,248 --> 00:25:45,001
OK, fans, it looks like it's
almost time for the bell.
586
00:25:45,085 --> 00:25:46,294
Tommy, please.
587
00:25:46,378 --> 00:25:47,629
Bob is actually a very nice guy.
588
00:25:47,712 --> 00:25:50,632
Yeah, well, excuse
me, but I got to go
589
00:25:50,715 --> 00:25:51,591
rip your boyfriend apart now.
590
00:25:51,675 --> 00:25:53,677
EDDIE DUMONT: All
right, wrestling fans,
591
00:25:53,760 --> 00:25:56,554
we are seconds away from
the match of the century.
592
00:25:56,638 --> 00:25:59,140
A few [inaudible]
from the Mangler.
593
00:25:59,224 --> 00:26:02,310
Going to take more than cape
work to win this bout, Mangler.
594
00:26:02,394 --> 00:26:03,979
All right, they're
stepping into the ring.
595
00:26:04,062 --> 00:26:05,563
The fans are on the
edge of their seat.
596
00:26:05,647 --> 00:26:06,648
[ding]
There's the bell.
597
00:26:06,731 --> 00:26:07,315
They're circling around
looking for that ever
598
00:26:07,399 --> 00:26:09,734
important first advantage.
599
00:26:09,818 --> 00:26:11,278
Lot of aggression
here on the face.
600
00:26:11,361 --> 00:26:12,320
A lot of aggression.
601
00:26:12,404 --> 00:26:13,738
And they're locking up.
602
00:26:13,822 --> 00:26:14,489
They're locking up, fans.
603
00:26:14,572 --> 00:26:16,157
Neither one has the advantage.
604
00:26:16,241 --> 00:26:17,617
They're looking.
605
00:26:17,701 --> 00:26:19,202
They're looking, and the Mangler
is going for a head lock.
606
00:26:19,286 --> 00:26:20,287
He used the hair
to get a head lock.
607
00:26:20,370 --> 00:26:22,163
Illegal use of hair!
608
00:26:22,247 --> 00:26:23,873
We're talking hair here, ref!
609
00:26:23,957 --> 00:26:25,583
We're talking illegal hair!
610
00:26:25,667 --> 00:26:28,336
And now Mangler is slamming
Lover Boy to the canvas.
611
00:26:28,420 --> 00:26:29,337
Hey, ref, wake up!
612
00:26:29,421 --> 00:26:31,881
Boy, you ever work with
this ref before, Hulk?
613
00:26:31,965 --> 00:26:32,841
Are you kidding?
614
00:26:32,924 --> 00:26:34,175
I wouldn't work with
anybody in there.
615
00:26:34,259 --> 00:26:35,802
EDDIE DUMONT: All right, the
Mangler is working his eyes,
616
00:26:35,885 --> 00:26:37,971
and now the Mangler is on
the rope, and it's leap frog.
617
00:26:38,054 --> 00:26:42,309
Whoa, Nelly!
618
00:26:42,392 --> 00:26:44,311
It could've been Sunday!
619
00:26:44,394 --> 00:26:45,270
Come on, Lover Boy!
620
00:26:45,353 --> 00:26:46,938
Give him the grip of death!
621
00:26:47,022 --> 00:26:48,315
Come on, Mangler!
622
00:26:48,398 --> 00:26:48,857
Rip his lips off!
623
00:26:48,940 --> 00:26:50,817
Come on!
624
00:26:50,900 --> 00:26:51,985
Kill him!
625
00:26:52,068 --> 00:26:53,361
EDDIE DUMONT: And now they're
locking up, locking up.
626
00:26:53,445 --> 00:26:54,904
And the Mangler
has him by the leg.
627
00:26:54,988 --> 00:26:59,534
He's got him by the leg, and
it's a step over toe hold.
628
00:26:59,617 --> 00:27:03,038
The Mangler is mangling
Lover Boy's foot.
629
00:27:03,121 --> 00:27:04,831
He just-- oh, face is kicked!
630
00:27:04,914 --> 00:27:05,582
Illegal kick, ref!
631
00:27:05,665 --> 00:27:06,624
Illegal kick!
632
00:27:06,708 --> 00:27:07,334
Tommy!
633
00:27:07,417 --> 00:27:09,002
Tommy, let him go!
634
00:27:09,085 --> 00:27:11,963
EDDIE DUMONT: He's still
toasting those toes.
635
00:27:12,047 --> 00:27:13,757
Oh, he won't fit
into that shoe again.
636
00:27:13,840 --> 00:27:14,507
Not gonna fit into
that shoe, is he, Hulk?
637
00:27:14,591 --> 00:27:17,552
Still torturing those tootsies.
638
00:27:17,635 --> 00:27:19,888
And there's the tip off!
639
00:27:19,971 --> 00:27:21,890
And Lover Boy is-- a
kick up by Lover Boy!
640
00:27:21,973 --> 00:27:26,144
And they're circling around,
looking for that advantage.
641
00:27:26,227 --> 00:27:29,272
Looking and locking
up again, fans.
642
00:27:29,356 --> 00:27:30,732
Locking up again.
643
00:27:30,815 --> 00:27:32,025
And-- oh, Mangler
grabs the hair,
644
00:27:32,108 --> 00:27:35,737
and Mangler has him in a vicious
head lock working the eyes.
645
00:27:35,820 --> 00:27:38,156
On the rope, and dipsy doodle.
646
00:27:38,239 --> 00:27:39,741
Here comes big splash!
647
00:27:39,824 --> 00:27:40,742
Just misses!
648
00:27:40,825 --> 00:27:41,743
Just misses!
649
00:27:41,826 --> 00:27:44,412
Mangler rolls away,
but he is tired, fans.
650
00:27:44,496 --> 00:27:45,747
He is tired.
651
00:27:45,830 --> 00:27:46,414
They're looking.
652
00:27:46,498 --> 00:27:49,000
And big splash misses!
653
00:27:49,084 --> 00:27:50,210
Little puddle.
654
00:27:50,293 --> 00:27:51,961
These boys are tired.
655
00:27:52,045 --> 00:27:52,796
Is it gonna be a draw?
656
00:27:52,879 --> 00:27:55,840
It's gut instinct
alone now fans.
657
00:27:55,924 --> 00:27:58,093
They're up, and it's bear hug.
658
00:27:58,176 --> 00:28:00,261
Bear hug.
659
00:28:00,345 --> 00:28:01,971
Who has the advantage?
660
00:28:02,055 --> 00:28:02,972
It's hard to tell,
wrestling fans,
661
00:28:03,056 --> 00:28:05,100
as these tired warriors
fall to their knees.
662
00:28:05,183 --> 00:28:07,852
Oh, a last grip!
663
00:28:07,936 --> 00:28:10,772
Hulk, this certainly isn't
the match we anticipated.
664
00:28:10,855 --> 00:28:13,316
Yeah, these guys are a lot
worse than I thought they were.
665
00:28:13,400 --> 00:28:17,612
They don't even deserve to
call themselves wrestlers!
666
00:28:17,695 --> 00:28:19,114
Wait just a gosh
darn minute, fans.
667
00:28:19,197 --> 00:28:22,200
The Hulkster is going into the
ring and is going to do damage!
668
00:28:22,283 --> 00:28:23,952
This is totally unexpected.
669
00:28:24,035 --> 00:28:24,786
What are you doing?
670
00:28:24,869 --> 00:28:25,703
This is our fight.
671
00:28:25,787 --> 00:28:27,622
You're an insult
to my profession.
672
00:28:27,705 --> 00:28:29,082
My integrity's at stake here.
673
00:28:33,711 --> 00:28:35,088
[inaudible]
674
00:28:35,171 --> 00:28:37,173
EDDIE DUMONT: [inaudible]
he's killing Lover Boy!
675
00:28:37,257 --> 00:28:38,299
He's got him by the throat!
676
00:28:38,383 --> 00:28:41,594
And oh my god, there goes
Lover Boy into the fans!
677
00:28:41,678 --> 00:28:43,096
And here's the Mangler.
678
00:28:43,179 --> 00:28:45,682
Women and children are
running for their lives.
679
00:28:49,894 --> 00:28:51,771
Fans, in all my
years in wrestling,
680
00:28:51,855 --> 00:28:53,982
I have never seen
anything like this.
681
00:28:54,065 --> 00:28:57,068
Hulk Hogan has single
handedly ended this match.
682
00:28:57,152 --> 00:29:00,780
I predict there will be an
investigation and a rematch.
683
00:29:00,864 --> 00:29:04,701
Stay tuned to AWN
for future updates.
684
00:29:14,169 --> 00:29:17,630
I know gopher is behind
all those memos, loyalty
685
00:29:17,714 --> 00:29:19,382
oaths, strange announcements.
686
00:29:19,466 --> 00:29:22,844
It appears gopher is
suffering from a delusion.
687
00:29:22,927 --> 00:29:24,762
He thinks he's you.
688
00:29:24,846 --> 00:29:26,139
He thinks he's me.
689
00:29:26,222 --> 00:29:28,183
No, him, the captain.
690
00:29:28,266 --> 00:29:29,684
Me, why?
691
00:29:29,767 --> 00:29:31,436
Well, it all started
on the lido deck.
692
00:29:31,519 --> 00:29:33,771
Gopher was telling me
about the dressing down
693
00:29:33,855 --> 00:29:35,773
that you gave him,
and everyone else
694
00:29:35,857 --> 00:29:37,901
was watching the
Amazing Zimmerman
695
00:29:37,984 --> 00:29:40,653
trying to hypnotize Jane.
696
00:29:45,783 --> 00:29:47,452
You don't think that--
697
00:29:47,535 --> 00:29:49,412
I think Gopher's
been hypnotized
698
00:29:49,496 --> 00:29:50,497
into believing he's me.
699
00:29:50,580 --> 00:29:53,333
Oh, you can't be serious.
700
00:29:53,416 --> 00:29:54,918
Zimmerman is a
terrible hypnotist.
701
00:29:55,001 --> 00:29:59,672
Well, even a bad hypnotist
is successful sometimes.
702
00:29:59,756 --> 00:30:02,050
You've got to find him and
get Gopher out of this.
703
00:30:02,133 --> 00:30:04,219
Well, sir, that's going
to be a little difficult.
704
00:30:04,302 --> 00:30:06,679
You see, the passengers
hated his act
705
00:30:06,763 --> 00:30:07,889
so much that I had to fire him.
706
00:30:07,972 --> 00:30:09,557
The last time I saw
him he was wandering
707
00:30:09,641 --> 00:30:12,560
around the ship depressed.
708
00:30:12,644 --> 00:30:15,271
Well, what are we gonna do?
709
00:30:15,355 --> 00:30:16,564
Well, the post
hypnotic suggestion
710
00:30:16,648 --> 00:30:18,441
has got to wear off in time.
711
00:30:18,525 --> 00:30:19,984
All right, you
look for Zimmerman.
712
00:30:20,068 --> 00:30:20,318
You look for Gopher.
713
00:30:20,401 --> 00:30:22,362
Right.
714
00:30:22,445 --> 00:30:23,863
At least he didn't
do any real harm.
715
00:30:23,947 --> 00:30:24,656
Right.
716
00:30:26,574 --> 00:30:29,744
ACE: Something wrong, sir?
717
00:30:29,827 --> 00:30:31,704
Yes.
718
00:30:31,788 --> 00:30:33,456
The coast is supposed
to be on the port side.
719
00:30:41,214 --> 00:30:44,259
I want you to search this ship
and find Gopher on the double.
720
00:30:44,342 --> 00:30:46,469
ALL: Yes, sir.
721
00:30:46,553 --> 00:30:47,387
Hello, bridge.
722
00:30:47,470 --> 00:30:48,680
This is the captain--
723
00:30:48,763 --> 00:30:51,975
the real captain, and I
don't have a happy face.
724
00:31:00,858 --> 00:31:02,151
JUDY [ON INTERCOM]:
We hope you enjoy
725
00:31:02,235 --> 00:31:02,860
your afternoon in Acapulco.
726
00:31:02,944 --> 00:31:04,571
The ship sails at midnight.
727
00:31:04,654 --> 00:31:07,031
Oh, and if anyone sees
the amazing Zimmerman,
728
00:31:07,115 --> 00:31:10,034
please tell him to report to the
captain's office immediately.
729
00:31:24,632 --> 00:31:25,508
Gretchen, I gotta
level with you.
730
00:31:25,592 --> 00:31:27,260
I got lousy feet.
731
00:31:27,343 --> 00:31:29,178
No kidding.
732
00:31:29,262 --> 00:31:30,513
After all the dancing
we did last night
733
00:31:30,597 --> 00:31:32,348
and all the walking
around today,
734
00:31:32,432 --> 00:31:34,809
I'm gonna be laid up
for at least a week.
735
00:31:34,892 --> 00:31:37,312
I just told you my
deepest, darkest secret.
736
00:31:37,395 --> 00:31:40,023
It's your turn.
737
00:31:40,106 --> 00:31:41,482
I don't know what
you're talking about.
738
00:31:41,566 --> 00:31:42,483
Come on, Gretchen.
739
00:31:42,567 --> 00:31:44,736
You obviously have
something on your mind.
740
00:31:44,819 --> 00:31:46,613
I'd just like to
know what it is.
741
00:31:46,696 --> 00:31:48,156
I just don't know
how to tell you.
742
00:31:48,239 --> 00:31:49,490
Why don't you make
easy on yourself?
743
00:31:49,574 --> 00:31:52,118
Just kind of talk to me.
744
00:31:52,201 --> 00:31:52,243
All right.
745
00:31:57,248 --> 00:32:04,380
I'm pregnant.
746
00:32:04,380 --> 00:32:06,049
You're joking
with me, aren't you?
747
00:32:06,132 --> 00:32:08,051
No, I'm not.
748
00:32:08,134 --> 00:32:08,843
Oh, come on, Gretchen.
749
00:32:08,926 --> 00:32:10,011
I studied biology.
750
00:32:10,094 --> 00:32:11,554
Nothing we did last night
could've caused that.
751
00:32:11,638 --> 00:32:13,848
It's not you.
752
00:32:13,931 --> 00:32:14,682
It's not anyone.
753
00:32:17,477 --> 00:32:20,355
This doesn't have anything
to do with spaceships, does it?
754
00:32:20,438 --> 00:32:21,314
No, I'm serious.
755
00:32:21,397 --> 00:32:27,320
I was-- well, um, the
cold clinical term
756
00:32:27,403 --> 00:32:30,198
is artificially inseminated.
757
00:32:30,281 --> 00:32:30,990
Why?
758
00:32:36,746 --> 00:32:38,706
Because I wanted to have a
baby, and there wasn't any one
759
00:32:38,790 --> 00:32:39,999
around I wanted to have it with.
760
00:32:43,586 --> 00:32:45,254
You find that strange?
761
00:32:49,300 --> 00:32:53,179
I never really gave
it much thought before.
762
00:32:53,262 --> 00:32:54,555
Probably because I never
actually wanted children
763
00:32:54,639 --> 00:32:58,726
myself under any circumstances.
764
00:32:58,810 --> 00:33:04,065
Well, that certainly
changes things, doesn't it?
765
00:33:04,148 --> 00:33:05,024
I won't waste
anymore of your time.
766
00:33:20,832 --> 00:33:21,999
- Hi.
- Hi.
767
00:33:22,083 --> 00:33:22,750
Hi.
768
00:33:22,834 --> 00:33:24,502
Has, uh, anybody seen Gopher?
769
00:33:24,585 --> 00:33:26,295
He was here five minutes ago.
770
00:33:26,379 --> 00:33:29,215
Isaac-- and if he's going
to be captain, I'm quitting.
771
00:33:42,895 --> 00:33:46,232
Uh, excuse me?
772
00:33:46,315 --> 00:33:49,944
Uh, uh, Lover Boy?
773
00:33:57,160 --> 00:34:02,665
Uh, listen, I have
to admit I used
774
00:34:02,749 --> 00:34:04,709
to think this pro wrestling
stuff was pretty silly,
775
00:34:04,792 --> 00:34:06,627
but I have to hand it to you.
776
00:34:06,711 --> 00:34:07,295
I mean, you guys
really earn your money.
777
00:34:07,378 --> 00:34:09,005
- Oh!
- Oh, I'm sorry.
778
00:34:26,939 --> 00:34:28,149
Gopher!
779
00:34:28,232 --> 00:34:28,858
[inaudible]
780
00:34:28,941 --> 00:34:31,152
Oh, you were wonderful.
781
00:34:31,235 --> 00:34:32,695
Just relax here for a while.
782
00:34:32,779 --> 00:34:34,447
Trust me, you'll
feel so much better.
783
00:34:34,530 --> 00:34:37,283
I feel like I've ridden
coast to coast under a truck.
784
00:34:45,374 --> 00:34:46,125
No, uh-uh.
785
00:34:46,209 --> 00:34:47,502
I'm not staying
in here with you.
786
00:34:47,585 --> 00:34:48,503
Oh, yes you are.
787
00:34:48,586 --> 00:34:49,837
I'm not letting you two
out until you can talk
788
00:34:49,921 --> 00:34:51,172
to each other like grown ups.
789
00:34:51,255 --> 00:34:53,841
Hey, you want to replay
the match right now.
790
00:34:53,925 --> 00:34:55,092
Hey, guys.
791
00:34:55,176 --> 00:34:56,761
Listen, can't you
reason together?
792
00:34:56,844 --> 00:34:58,763
Violence never settled anything.
793
00:34:58,846 --> 00:34:59,222
We could warm up to you.
794
00:35:02,934 --> 00:35:04,352
Uh, excuse me.
795
00:35:04,435 --> 00:35:05,853
I'm just an innocent bystander.
796
00:35:05,937 --> 00:35:07,522
Ah!
797
00:35:07,605 --> 00:35:08,648
Could you let me out?
798
00:35:16,739 --> 00:35:19,242
You better start talking.
799
00:35:19,325 --> 00:35:20,952
I'm staying right here,
and I'm not letting
800
00:35:21,035 --> 00:35:22,328
you out until you shake hands.
801
00:35:26,457 --> 00:35:28,793
Oh.
802
00:35:28,876 --> 00:35:32,088
Oh, I'd like to punch you
if I could lift my arm.
803
00:35:50,189 --> 00:35:52,608
Gopher, you in there?
804
00:35:52,692 --> 00:35:54,360
Safety check.
805
00:35:54,443 --> 00:35:54,485
Could save your life.
806
00:36:04,161 --> 00:36:05,037
A-ha!
807
00:36:05,121 --> 00:36:05,913
The imposter.
808
00:36:05,997 --> 00:36:07,582
So, you think you
can steal my ship?
809
00:36:07,665 --> 00:36:09,333
Gopher?
810
00:36:09,417 --> 00:36:10,418
What?
811
00:36:10,501 --> 00:36:10,918
I mean--
812
00:36:11,002 --> 00:36:13,880
I mean, captain.
813
00:36:13,963 --> 00:36:15,089
Uh, look, why, uh--
814
00:36:15,172 --> 00:36:25,266
why don't-- why don't
we talk this over?
815
00:36:25,349 --> 00:36:26,058
Don't touch!
816
00:36:26,142 --> 00:36:27,685
Never touch!
817
00:36:27,768 --> 00:36:29,729
What makes you
think that you could
818
00:36:29,812 --> 00:36:31,105
be the captain of anything?
819
00:36:31,188 --> 00:36:32,023
How dare you talk to me like--
What?
820
00:36:32,106 --> 00:36:34,275
I mean-- I mean,
you're right, sir.
821
00:36:34,358 --> 00:36:35,484
Yes, you're absolutely right.
822
00:36:35,568 --> 00:36:38,321
But I-- I thought you'd be
the kind of captain of such
823
00:36:38,404 --> 00:36:40,781
a stature that you would
like to discuss things
824
00:36:40,865 --> 00:36:43,784
and-- and-- and work them out.
825
00:36:43,868 --> 00:36:45,077
There's nothing to discuss.
826
00:36:45,161 --> 00:36:47,288
It's a question of
mutiny, pure and simple,
827
00:36:47,371 --> 00:36:50,374
and it just won't wash!
828
00:36:50,458 --> 00:36:51,250
No one is going to hurt you.
829
00:36:51,334 --> 00:36:53,210
Everything's going
to be all right.
830
00:36:53,294 --> 00:36:53,711
Trust us.
- Be cool.
831
00:36:53,794 --> 00:36:55,546
I'm cool.
832
00:36:55,630 --> 00:36:57,924
We just want to
have a little chat.
833
00:36:58,007 --> 00:36:59,467
Yeah, we just want to talk.
834
00:36:59,550 --> 00:37:00,176
Yeah, uh, don't worry, folks.
835
00:37:00,259 --> 00:37:02,053
It's just a little game we play.
836
00:37:02,136 --> 00:37:03,471
It's called catch the captain.
837
00:37:03,554 --> 00:37:05,139
It's a tradition of the sea.
838
00:37:05,222 --> 00:37:06,807
Oh, catch the captain
is your game then, is it?
839
00:37:06,891 --> 00:37:07,975
Yeah.
840
00:37:08,059 --> 00:37:12,355
In that case, you'll
never take me alive.
841
00:37:18,611 --> 00:37:20,154
Oh my god.
842
00:37:20,237 --> 00:37:20,821
Man overboard!
843
00:37:20,905 --> 00:37:23,741
Man overboard!
844
00:37:23,824 --> 00:37:26,160
We know there's
a man overboard.
845
00:37:26,243 --> 00:37:27,161
Throw the line!
846
00:37:31,916 --> 00:37:33,417
She's still there.
847
00:37:36,045 --> 00:37:38,130
You know she's not
gonna let us out
848
00:37:38,214 --> 00:37:40,132
of here till we shake hands.
849
00:37:40,216 --> 00:37:42,468
Look, I understand how
you feel about Linda.
850
00:37:42,551 --> 00:37:46,305
I mean, if she was my sister,
I'd try to protect her, too.
851
00:37:46,389 --> 00:37:47,890
I just wanted
something better for her
852
00:37:47,974 --> 00:37:49,016
than to fall in love
with some guy that--
853
00:37:49,100 --> 00:37:52,353
that's famous for chasing women.
854
00:37:52,436 --> 00:37:54,188
Come on.
855
00:37:54,271 --> 00:37:56,857
What's the real problem?
856
00:37:56,941 --> 00:37:59,360
Look, I got no
problem with you.
857
00:37:59,443 --> 00:38:01,362
I just want better for
her than to get involved
858
00:38:01,445 --> 00:38:03,864
with a wrestler like me.
859
00:38:03,948 --> 00:38:06,033
No offense, Thomas, but
I don't plan on doing
860
00:38:06,117 --> 00:38:07,493
this the rest of my life.
861
00:38:07,576 --> 00:38:09,662
Soon I'll have enough
saved up to do exactly
862
00:38:09,745 --> 00:38:11,956
what I've always wanted to do--
863
00:38:12,039 --> 00:38:13,958
get a little house
in New Hampshire
864
00:38:14,041 --> 00:38:14,667
and open up a
sporting goods store.
865
00:38:14,750 --> 00:38:16,877
Really?
866
00:38:16,961 --> 00:38:20,256
If you need any advice, I just
got my real estate license.
867
00:38:20,339 --> 00:38:23,384
Well, you know, we
are doing pretty well.
868
00:38:23,467 --> 00:38:26,012
Maybe we ought to shake
hands and get out of here
869
00:38:26,095 --> 00:38:27,805
before we're both dehydrated.
870
00:38:33,602 --> 00:38:34,937
Linda, look, we're shaking.
871
00:38:38,607 --> 00:38:40,526
JUDY [ON INTERCOM]: Attention,
flappers and gangsters,
872
00:38:40,609 --> 00:38:43,529
don't miss our roaring '20s show
at the international lounge.
873
00:38:52,413 --> 00:38:53,664
You can do this, Starlight.
874
00:38:53,748 --> 00:38:54,832
I can?
875
00:38:54,915 --> 00:38:56,459
Break a leg.
876
00:38:56,542 --> 00:38:59,420
That is a terrible
thing to say.
877
00:38:59,503 --> 00:39:01,297
It means good luck.
878
00:39:01,380 --> 00:39:02,590
Oh.
879
00:39:02,673 --> 00:39:04,216
I'll never understand
this business.
880
00:39:07,136 --> 00:39:07,928
Good luck.
881
00:39:08,012 --> 00:39:09,513
[interposing voices]
882
00:39:09,597 --> 00:39:13,100
Ladies and gentlemen, the
Mermaids with a salute to that
883
00:39:13,184 --> 00:39:18,689
roaring decade, the '20s!
884
00:39:18,773 --> 00:39:20,191
ALL: [SINGING] [inaudible].
885
00:39:25,154 --> 00:39:26,530
Oh, yeah.
886
00:39:26,614 --> 00:39:30,076
Welcome to the bungalow
of the roaring '20s.
887
00:39:30,159 --> 00:39:33,370
Flappers dance [inaudible]
Charleston [inaudible]..
888
00:39:39,043 --> 00:39:42,463
Riding in the rumble
seat with the bees knees.
889
00:39:42,546 --> 00:39:43,172
Can't breathe.
890
00:39:43,255 --> 00:39:45,966
[inaudible] up to our throat.
891
00:39:46,050 --> 00:39:47,843
No one shivers in our flippers.
892
00:39:51,806 --> 00:39:53,891
Wow.
893
00:39:53,974 --> 00:39:55,393
We're the cat's meow, and how!
894
00:39:55,476 --> 00:40:01,023
If that's not cool with
you, then 23 skidoo.
895
00:40:01,107 --> 00:40:05,111
Everything is hunky
dory and [inaudible]..
896
00:40:05,194 --> 00:40:07,696
Betty Boop and [inaudible].
897
00:40:07,780 --> 00:40:09,657
Valentino on the screen.
898
00:40:09,740 --> 00:40:11,659
Model Ts and [inaudible].
899
00:40:11,742 --> 00:40:13,744
Al Capone and Rin Tin Tin.
900
00:40:13,828 --> 00:40:17,414
We can hardly wait till '29.
901
00:40:17,498 --> 00:40:23,921
ALL: 'Cause 1929 looks fine.
902
00:40:24,004 --> 00:40:24,755
Black bottom.
903
00:40:24,839 --> 00:40:26,465
A new cruiser.
904
00:40:26,549 --> 00:40:28,801
You sure got a [inaudible].
905
00:40:28,884 --> 00:40:32,763
We got their hands into a
raggedy [inaudible] hot.
906
00:40:45,484 --> 00:40:49,321
We jump right in and
give all a [inaudible]..
907
00:40:58,914 --> 00:41:00,291
ALL: Boo boopie doop.
908
00:41:03,294 --> 00:41:04,170
Bo doggie-o.
909
00:41:04,253 --> 00:41:05,713
Black bottom A new cruiser.
910
00:41:05,796 --> 00:41:08,799
When you spot 'em,
you go with 'em and,
911
00:41:08,883 --> 00:41:12,761
do that black, black bottom.
912
00:41:12,845 --> 00:41:16,307
Do that black, black bottom.
913
00:41:16,390 --> 00:41:19,643
Do that black, black
bottom all the day long.
914
00:41:31,697 --> 00:41:35,201
Down on Wall Street,
things are looking fine,
915
00:41:35,284 --> 00:41:44,168
and we just can't
wait till 1929!
916
00:41:44,251 --> 00:41:44,752
Woo!
917
00:41:44,835 --> 00:41:49,673
[applause]
918
00:41:49,757 --> 00:41:50,716
[interposing voices]
919
00:41:50,799 --> 00:41:54,053
[cheering]
920
00:42:01,143 --> 00:42:03,229
Who threw me in the bay?
921
00:42:03,312 --> 00:42:04,438
As soon as I find that
out and tell the captain,
922
00:42:04,521 --> 00:42:06,982
somebody is gonna be
in a lot of trouble.
923
00:42:07,066 --> 00:42:08,234
Don't you think
you're the captain?
924
00:42:08,317 --> 00:42:08,943
No, I don't.
Why?
925
00:42:09,026 --> 00:42:09,902
Why would I think that?
Why?
926
00:42:09,985 --> 00:42:10,236
Gopher?
927
00:42:10,319 --> 00:42:11,612
What?
928
00:42:11,695 --> 00:42:12,780
We need to talk.
929
00:42:12,863 --> 00:42:13,656
Yes, sir, right away.
930
00:42:13,739 --> 00:42:14,865
But you better change first.
931
00:42:14,949 --> 00:42:16,116
I don't want you
dripping on my carpet.
932
00:42:16,200 --> 00:42:17,493
Yes, sir.
933
00:42:17,576 --> 00:42:18,577
Who threw me in the bay?
- That's all I want to know.
934
00:42:18,661 --> 00:42:19,703
Well, it's a long--
935
00:42:19,787 --> 00:42:20,120
it's a long story.
936
00:42:20,204 --> 00:42:20,704
All right.
937
00:42:25,209 --> 00:42:27,628
JUDY [ON INTERCOM]: We're
now leaving lovely Acapulco.
938
00:42:27,711 --> 00:42:30,798
We hope you've enjoyed your
stay as much as we have.
939
00:42:30,881 --> 00:42:32,132
Our next stop is Los Angeles.
940
00:42:32,216 --> 00:42:32,967
Buenas noches.
941
00:42:41,642 --> 00:42:43,143
Oh, what a cruise.
942
00:42:43,227 --> 00:42:46,146
One of our crew members
literally jumped overboard.
943
00:42:46,230 --> 00:42:47,481
We just picked him up.
944
00:42:47,564 --> 00:42:49,984
I mean, it's a miracle
we saw him down
945
00:42:50,067 --> 00:42:51,151
there at night in the dark sea.
946
00:42:51,235 --> 00:42:53,279
He can't even swim.
947
00:42:53,362 --> 00:42:54,530
He missed the dock by that much.
948
00:42:54,613 --> 00:42:57,408
I mean, it's just
incredible he wasn't hurt.
949
00:42:57,491 --> 00:43:00,869
Did you ever have kids, doc?
950
00:43:00,953 --> 00:43:03,497
OK, we'll talk about what
you want to talk about.
951
00:43:03,580 --> 00:43:05,833
No, I never had any of my own.
952
00:43:05,916 --> 00:43:08,627
I like to think I
still might someday.
953
00:43:08,711 --> 00:43:10,212
I never wanted any.
954
00:43:10,296 --> 00:43:13,048
But your books?
955
00:43:13,132 --> 00:43:14,091
My books--
956
00:43:14,174 --> 00:43:16,302
I only give them problems
I can solve, doc.
957
00:43:16,385 --> 00:43:18,512
That way, if I make a
mistake, nobody gets hurt.
958
00:43:18,596 --> 00:43:21,598
But in real life, if a
father makes a mistake,
959
00:43:21,682 --> 00:43:23,600
it's the kid who pays.
960
00:43:23,684 --> 00:43:24,643
If only perfect
people had children,
961
00:43:24,727 --> 00:43:29,732
the human race would
die out very quickly.
962
00:43:29,815 --> 00:43:32,234
Difficult decision
to make, isn't it, doc?
963
00:43:32,318 --> 00:43:33,527
Of course it is.
964
00:43:33,610 --> 00:43:37,865
Being responsible for another
person is frightening prospect,
965
00:43:37,948 --> 00:43:41,410
but you can't let fear stand
in the way of your shot
966
00:43:41,493 --> 00:43:43,662
at happiness.
967
00:43:43,746 --> 00:43:45,664
Now can we talk about
what I want to talk about?
968
00:43:50,919 --> 00:43:52,838
Well, I'm ready to turn in.
969
00:43:52,921 --> 00:43:54,715
How about you, kid?
970
00:43:54,798 --> 00:43:55,758
[knocking]
971
00:44:04,141 --> 00:44:06,101
Hi.
972
00:44:06,185 --> 00:44:07,061
Hi.
973
00:44:07,144 --> 00:44:08,020
Are you alone?
974
00:44:08,103 --> 00:44:10,898
I thought I heard someone.
975
00:44:10,981 --> 00:44:11,565
I'm not alone.
976
00:44:11,648 --> 00:44:13,067
I was talking to my baby.
977
00:44:13,150 --> 00:44:16,904
How is he or she?
978
00:44:16,987 --> 00:44:19,073
Fine.
979
00:44:19,156 --> 00:44:21,492
May I come in?
980
00:44:31,960 --> 00:44:34,755
I've, uh, been working
on my new book.
981
00:44:34,838 --> 00:44:37,758
I, uh, just can't seem to
lick one little plot problem,
982
00:44:37,841 --> 00:44:39,968
and sometimes it helps if I
tell the story to somebody else.
983
00:44:40,052 --> 00:44:42,221
Why me?
984
00:44:42,304 --> 00:44:43,680
Oh, you're kidding.
985
00:44:43,764 --> 00:44:46,266
Your criticism of "The Runaway
Frog" showed real insight.
986
00:44:46,350 --> 00:44:50,270
I'm listening.
987
00:44:50,354 --> 00:44:52,606
OK.
988
00:44:52,689 --> 00:44:54,316
Once upon a time,
there was this guy--
989
00:44:54,400 --> 00:44:54,942
A guy?
990
00:44:55,025 --> 00:44:55,776
Not a pony or a frog?
991
00:44:55,859 --> 00:44:56,860
I'm trying to
grow as a writer.
992
00:45:01,740 --> 00:45:04,618
So anyway, this guy was sort
of dashing in his own way,
993
00:45:04,701 --> 00:45:06,620
but he wasn't perfect.
994
00:45:06,703 --> 00:45:09,998
More importantly,
he wasn't expecting
995
00:45:10,082 --> 00:45:12,835
to meet the woman of his
dreams, fall in love,
996
00:45:12,918 --> 00:45:16,922
and become a prospective
father all in one fell swoop.
997
00:45:17,005 --> 00:45:18,632
He was a little frightened.
998
00:45:18,715 --> 00:45:19,967
Who isn't?
999
00:45:20,050 --> 00:45:23,137
Bear with me, please, because
this is a work in progress,
1000
00:45:23,220 --> 00:45:24,221
all right?
1001
00:45:27,558 --> 00:45:30,602
So this guy loves this
woman, and he just
1002
00:45:30,686 --> 00:45:32,813
wants to get a
fresh start and take
1003
00:45:32,896 --> 00:45:34,648
it one little step at a time.
1004
00:45:34,731 --> 00:45:36,316
How-- how does that-- how
does that sound so far?
1005
00:45:36,400 --> 00:45:38,026
Does it make sense?
1006
00:45:38,110 --> 00:45:38,777
This guy and this woman--
1007
00:45:38,861 --> 00:45:41,196
do they live happily ever after?
1008
00:45:41,280 --> 00:45:46,160
Absolutely.
1009
00:45:46,243 --> 00:45:48,454
So what do you think?
1010
00:45:48,537 --> 00:45:49,830
I think it's a bestseller.
1011
00:46:15,314 --> 00:46:18,358
Hey, Hulk Hogan.
1012
00:46:18,442 --> 00:46:20,402
Hey, well, me and
the Mangler do hereby
1013
00:46:20,486 --> 00:46:22,529
challenge you to a tag
team match with you
1014
00:46:22,613 --> 00:46:25,741
and somebody equally as ugly.
1015
00:46:25,824 --> 00:46:26,950
You know, you got to be
kidding, little dude man.
1016
00:46:27,034 --> 00:46:29,786
I already busted you and
your sister up all by myself.
1017
00:46:29,870 --> 00:46:32,706
I got a lot of top
contenders to worry about,
1018
00:46:32,789 --> 00:46:34,208
and I don't have time to play
games with you two clowns.
1019
00:46:34,291 --> 00:46:36,043
Yeah?
1020
00:46:36,126 --> 00:46:37,085
Yeah, but this time
we'll be ready,
1021
00:46:37,169 --> 00:46:38,253
and you'll be eating canvas.
1022
00:46:38,337 --> 00:46:39,713
You heard it here,
wrestling fans.
1023
00:46:39,797 --> 00:46:42,382
The rematch of the century on
AWN, the All Wrestling Network.
1024
00:46:42,466 --> 00:46:43,550
Hulk?
1025
00:46:43,634 --> 00:46:44,927
Well, you know, I
can't believe this, man.
1026
00:46:45,010 --> 00:46:46,887
I came here for a
little R&R. I didn't
1027
00:46:46,970 --> 00:46:49,056
want to hear nothing about
this wrestling stuff,
1028
00:46:49,139 --> 00:46:50,098
and you know something?
1029
00:46:50,182 --> 00:46:51,725
You guys don't even look
like athletes to me.
1030
00:46:51,808 --> 00:46:54,353
I don't see any muscles, and
you know I don't see any brains,
1031
00:46:54,436 --> 00:46:55,854
but if you keep
jumping up in my face,
1032
00:46:55,938 --> 00:46:58,315
man, I just might take you
out there in that combat zone
1033
00:46:58,398 --> 00:47:01,360
and show you what
reality is all about.
1034
00:47:01,443 --> 00:47:03,153
JUDY: Thank you [inaudible].
1035
00:47:03,237 --> 00:47:06,073
Well, cousin, I guess
I owe you one after all.
1036
00:47:06,156 --> 00:47:07,407
You know, it's
all because of you
1037
00:47:07,491 --> 00:47:10,202
that I am becoming a husband
and a father at the same time.
1038
00:47:10,285 --> 00:47:11,453
Mm-hm.
1039
00:47:11,537 --> 00:47:13,080
I may make you a
character in my next book.
1040
00:47:13,163 --> 00:47:14,039
- Oh?
- Mm-hm.
1041
00:47:14,122 --> 00:47:16,917
Any objections to
being a panda bear?
1042
00:47:17,000 --> 00:47:18,961
Could you make
it a slim panda?
1043
00:47:19,044 --> 00:47:20,170
Sure.
1044
00:47:20,254 --> 00:47:22,756
Uh, Judy, there is
one more little thing
1045
00:47:22,839 --> 00:47:24,258
I need you to do for me.
1046
00:47:24,341 --> 00:47:25,342
What's that?
1047
00:47:25,425 --> 00:47:28,762
Explain all this
to the family.
1048
00:47:28,846 --> 00:47:30,430
Bye, thank you.
1049
00:47:30,514 --> 00:47:31,348
Thanks, Judy.
1050
00:47:31,431 --> 00:47:33,058
Good luck.
1051
00:47:36,520 --> 00:47:39,273
I can't tell you how terrible
I feel about this whole thing,
1052
00:47:39,356 --> 00:47:41,191
captain, really.
1053
00:47:41,275 --> 00:47:42,276
Are you sure that
I am the captain?
1054
00:47:42,359 --> 00:47:43,277
Oh, absolutely.
1055
00:47:43,360 --> 00:47:45,028
Absolutely.
1056
00:47:45,112 --> 00:47:46,196
No doubt about it.
1057
00:47:46,280 --> 00:47:48,615
Did I make a fool out of
myself on this or what?
1058
00:47:48,699 --> 00:47:50,617
Do you want the truth, or
do you want to remain friends?
1059
00:47:50,701 --> 00:47:53,287
Gopher, I want
you to know that I'm
1060
00:47:53,370 --> 00:47:55,956
not holding you responsible
for any of your actions.
1061
00:47:56,039 --> 00:47:56,665
Thank you, sir.
1062
00:47:56,748 --> 00:47:58,875
Appreciate that.
1063
00:47:58,959 --> 00:48:00,252
But can you honestly
say that things
1064
00:48:00,335 --> 00:48:03,714
didn't run just a teeny bit
better when I was the captain?
1065
00:48:03,797 --> 00:48:05,966
Don't make me sorry that
we fished you out of the bay.
1066
00:48:17,811 --> 00:48:22,274
[theme music]
74643
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