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1
00:00:01,172 --> 00:00:02,633
You're wrong.
2
00:00:02,633 --> 00:00:04,705
You've never been more wrong
About anything in your life.
3
00:00:04,705 --> 00:00:06,277
I can't even
Look at you right now.
4
00:00:06,277 --> 00:00:07,638
Okay, you know what?
5
00:00:07,638 --> 00:00:10,010
Can we just agree that
Richard gere and ryan gosling
6
00:00:10,010 --> 00:00:11,582
Are the sameamountof hot?
7
00:00:11,582 --> 00:00:12,583
Fine.
Fine.
8
00:00:12,583 --> 00:00:14,014
Good.
9
00:00:14,014 --> 00:00:15,786
Richard gere is timeless!
He's so old.
10
00:00:18,349 --> 00:00:21,652
Uh-oh. Abby's got
Her sickness rhino.
11
00:00:21,652 --> 00:00:24,095
I don't feel good.
12
00:00:24,095 --> 00:00:26,797
Oh, baby,
You're burning up.
13
00:00:26,797 --> 00:00:28,159
No school for you.
14
00:00:28,159 --> 00:00:29,530
Lucky.
15
00:00:29,530 --> 00:00:32,763
I'm not lucky.
I'm dying.
(knock on door)
16
00:00:35,506 --> 00:00:37,168
Top o' the morning, weavers.
17
00:00:37,168 --> 00:00:39,310
Is abby ready
To escort me to the bus stop?
18
00:00:39,310 --> 00:00:41,112
Oh, sorry, dick.
She's not gonna make it today.
19
00:00:41,112 --> 00:00:42,413
She got a cold.
20
00:00:42,413 --> 00:00:44,515
And we lost him.
21
00:00:44,515 --> 00:00:47,178
A cold is a common illness,
22
00:00:47,178 --> 00:00:48,279
And abby can't go
To school today
23
00:00:48,279 --> 00:00:49,650
'cause she's contagious.
24
00:00:49,650 --> 00:00:51,552
See how disgusting she looks?
25
00:00:51,552 --> 00:00:56,327
She can make other people
Look that disgusting, too.
26
00:00:56,327 --> 00:00:58,159
(sneezes)
27
00:00:58,159 --> 00:01:00,131
(clock ticking)
Excuse me.
28
00:01:00,131 --> 00:01:02,533
I gotta go do...
Step aerobics.
29
00:01:03,664 --> 00:01:06,337
Oh, baby, go back
To bed, okay?
30
00:01:06,337 --> 00:01:07,638
And I'm coming up soon.
31
00:01:07,638 --> 00:01:09,400
Go, baby.
Go, go, go.
32
00:01:09,400 --> 00:01:11,142
All right, listen up,
Everyone.
33
00:01:11,142 --> 00:01:13,474
Let's try real hard
Not to get abby's cold, okay?
34
00:01:13,474 --> 00:01:16,177
You're the one who's gonna
Kiss her and get us all sick.
35
00:01:16,177 --> 00:01:18,509
That's because I'm the one who
Has to take care of everyone.
36
00:01:18,509 --> 00:01:20,311
I'm this family's
Nurse jackie.
37
00:01:20,311 --> 00:01:22,753
You're this family's
Secret drug addict?
38
00:01:24,815 --> 00:01:27,158
Okay, clearly, I've never
Seen "Nurse jackie."
39
00:01:27,158 --> 00:01:29,690
Yeah, she's a drug addict.
(knock on door)
40
00:01:30,791 --> 00:01:32,163
We've been told
41
00:01:32,163 --> 00:01:33,864
That there's
A contagion in your house,
42
00:01:33,864 --> 00:01:35,226
And we've come to ensure
43
00:01:35,226 --> 00:01:36,767
It doesn't spread
To the community.
44
00:01:36,767 --> 00:01:37,768
What?
45
00:01:37,768 --> 00:01:39,870
We're here for the girl.
46
00:01:43,134 --> 00:01:48,309
♪♪♪
47
00:01:48,309 --> 00:01:50,841
Dick has informed me
That abby is "Sick."
48
00:01:50,841 --> 00:01:53,384
So we've come here to put her
In an isolation tent.
49
00:01:53,384 --> 00:01:54,815
She will fight off
The contamination alone
50
00:01:54,815 --> 00:01:58,219
In this sterile
Vinyl encasement.
51
00:01:58,219 --> 00:01:59,520
It's the zabvronian way.
52
00:01:59,520 --> 00:02:01,692
All right, honey,
Let's grab her and bag her.
53
00:02:01,692 --> 00:02:04,255
You're not gonna
Bag our daughter, larry.
54
00:02:04,255 --> 00:02:05,796
Okay, guys, sit down.
55
00:02:05,796 --> 00:02:08,429
She has a cold.
A cold is not serious.
56
00:02:08,429 --> 00:02:10,601
It just makes you
Feel gross and icky.
57
00:02:10,601 --> 00:02:12,303
Icky?
There's no cure,
58
00:02:12,303 --> 00:02:14,535
So our job is to make abby
As comfy as possible
59
00:02:14,535 --> 00:02:15,806
Until she gets better.
60
00:02:15,806 --> 00:02:17,238
We all have
Our own specific things
61
00:02:17,238 --> 00:02:18,769
That make us feel better
When we're sick.
62
00:02:18,769 --> 00:02:21,312
Yeah. With abby, she...
63
00:02:21,312 --> 00:02:24,715
Craves red meat.
64
00:02:24,715 --> 00:02:26,517
And max likes to watch kermit
Sing "Rainbow connection"
65
00:02:26,517 --> 00:02:29,149
On a loop.
Oh. What about amber?
66
00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:30,281
Nothing makes amber
Feel better.
Mnh-mnh.
67
00:02:30,281 --> 00:02:32,152
No, she just holes
Herself up in the room
68
00:02:32,152 --> 00:02:33,724
And rings a bell
When she needs something.
69
00:02:33,724 --> 00:02:34,725
We leave the soup
By the door,
70
00:02:34,725 --> 00:02:37,228
Knock twice, and haul ass.
71
00:02:37,228 --> 00:02:38,229
Mm.
72
00:02:38,229 --> 00:02:39,830
You have to admit
That nurturing
73
00:02:39,830 --> 00:02:41,161
Does sound much more pleasant
74
00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:43,234
Than our isolation tents.
75
00:02:43,234 --> 00:02:46,897
Back home, the one time
That reggie jackson fell ill,
76
00:02:46,897 --> 00:02:48,899
Four elders
Had to hold me back
77
00:02:48,899 --> 00:02:51,202
While he was led off
To be tented.
78
00:02:51,202 --> 00:02:53,244
Honey...
And I--I'm telling
A story.
79
00:02:53,244 --> 00:02:54,805
Yes, I know, but you told me
To tell you when you get rambly.
80
00:02:54,805 --> 00:02:55,806
Oh.
You're getting rambly.
81
00:02:55,806 --> 00:02:57,308
Oh. Sorry.
82
00:02:57,308 --> 00:03:00,751
So if you insist on exposing
Yourselves to the cold,
83
00:03:00,751 --> 00:03:04,385
I must declare
This home a quarantine.
84
00:03:04,385 --> 00:03:05,386
Husband!
85
00:03:05,386 --> 00:03:06,557
A quarantine it is!
86
00:03:06,557 --> 00:03:08,188
Thanks for stopping by.
(claps hands)
87
00:03:08,188 --> 00:03:09,390
No, I don't think
You understand.
88
00:03:09,390 --> 00:03:11,191
Otherwise, you'd be
Much more startled.
89
00:03:11,191 --> 00:03:13,294
You see, a quarantine means
We won't be able to visit you
90
00:03:13,294 --> 00:03:15,596
Or even be
In the same room as you.
91
00:03:15,596 --> 00:03:17,197
It'll be very hard on you
And yours,
92
00:03:17,197 --> 00:03:19,570
Because clearly, you've grown
Accustomed to our charms.
93
00:03:19,570 --> 00:03:20,771
See you soon!
94
00:03:20,771 --> 00:03:23,203
Whht! Come on. Whht!
95
00:03:24,435 --> 00:03:26,437
Having never been exposed
To the cold,
96
00:03:26,437 --> 00:03:28,579
We don't know
If we're able to catch it,
97
00:03:28,579 --> 00:03:31,542
But we're not about
To take any chances.
98
00:03:31,542 --> 00:03:33,344
Can we catch the cold?
99
00:03:33,344 --> 00:03:35,416
I literally just said
I don't know
100
00:03:35,416 --> 00:03:37,217
If we're able
To catch the cold.
101
00:03:37,217 --> 00:03:39,219
Billie jean,
Are you texting again?
102
00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:40,391
No.
(cell phone chimes, vibrates)
103
00:03:40,391 --> 00:03:42,293
Oh.
(murmuring)
104
00:03:42,293 --> 00:03:44,295
(laughs)
(laughs)
105
00:03:44,295 --> 00:03:45,526
Stop it, both of you.
106
00:03:45,526 --> 00:03:47,998
Now, we will need
To set up a perimeter
107
00:03:47,998 --> 00:03:49,800
Around the weaver home.
108
00:03:49,800 --> 00:03:51,932
Oh, husband, debbie weaver
Already told you
109
00:03:51,932 --> 00:03:55,306
That the cold's not dangerous.
It's merely a nuisance.
110
00:03:55,306 --> 00:03:57,608
Yes, she also told me I'd enjoy
Her box set of "Will & grace."
111
00:03:57,608 --> 00:03:58,769
But the show is maddening.
112
00:03:58,769 --> 00:04:00,611
I mean, just man up
And kiss her, will.
113
00:04:00,611 --> 00:04:01,612
What's stopping you?
114
00:04:01,612 --> 00:04:02,943
Oh, father, I think
Will is actually--
115
00:04:02,943 --> 00:04:04,445
Yes, not now,
Reggie, thank you.
116
00:04:06,517 --> 00:04:09,350
(rattling)
117
00:04:09,350 --> 00:04:13,253
Okay, sweetheart.
Here is your meatloaf
118
00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:15,956
With a side of flank steak.
119
00:04:15,956 --> 00:04:17,958
No fork, huh?
120
00:04:17,958 --> 00:04:19,390
Okay.
121
00:04:19,390 --> 00:04:22,793
Next time, you can make it
A little bit more rarer.
122
00:04:22,793 --> 00:04:23,794
Oh.
123
00:04:23,794 --> 00:04:26,667
I like when
I can taste the blood.
124
00:04:26,667 --> 00:04:28,999
Okay.
125
00:04:28,999 --> 00:04:31,442
Are you feeling
Any better?
126
00:04:31,442 --> 00:04:33,273
No. My head hurts.
Aw.
127
00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:34,845
Can you kiss it?
128
00:04:34,845 --> 00:04:37,708
Uh, well...
129
00:04:37,708 --> 00:04:39,380
Yeah...
(phone rings)
130
00:04:39,380 --> 00:04:41,512
Oh, hold on. Hold on.
(beeps)
131
00:04:41,512 --> 00:04:42,553
(chuckles) hello?
132
00:04:42,553 --> 00:04:43,914
Don't do it,
Debbie weaver.
133
00:04:43,914 --> 00:04:45,416
Don't kiss the girl.
134
00:04:45,416 --> 00:04:47,418
But she looks so sad.
135
00:04:47,418 --> 00:04:49,560
(phone vibrates)
Oh, hang on
A minute, larry.
136
00:04:49,560 --> 00:04:50,561
Or don't. Whatever.
(beeps)
137
00:04:50,561 --> 00:04:51,562
Hello?
138
00:04:51,562 --> 00:04:53,364
Kiss her, debbie weaver!
139
00:04:53,364 --> 00:04:55,826
Let me live vicariously
Through your nurturing.
140
00:04:55,826 --> 00:04:59,029
I want to, but I can't afford
To get sick right now.
141
00:04:59,029 --> 00:05:01,472
Of course not.
Think of the greater good.
142
00:05:01,472 --> 00:05:02,773
Think of your baby.
143
00:05:02,773 --> 00:05:05,075
She needs
Your impractical empathy.
144
00:05:05,075 --> 00:05:06,777
Don't be weak.
Don't be stupid.
145
00:05:06,777 --> 00:05:08,379
She loves you.
She needs you.
146
00:05:11,642 --> 00:05:12,643
(kisses)
147
00:05:12,643 --> 00:05:14,485
Thank you, mommy.
148
00:05:14,485 --> 00:05:16,987
Totally worth it.
149
00:05:16,987 --> 00:05:19,850
(inhaling)
150
00:05:19,850 --> 00:05:22,353
(sneezes)
151
00:05:30,861 --> 00:05:33,364
Totally worth it.
152
00:05:35,506 --> 00:05:37,508
(clock ticking)
153
00:05:37,508 --> 00:05:41,412
♪ someday we'll find it ♪
154
00:05:41,412 --> 00:05:44,645
♪ the rainbow connection ♪
155
00:05:44,645 --> 00:05:47,347
♪ the lovers, the dreamers ♪
156
00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:48,719
♪ and me ♪
(sneezes)
157
00:05:48,719 --> 00:05:50,421
(weakly) oh...
158
00:05:50,421 --> 00:05:52,483
You just had to kiss her.
159
00:05:53,724 --> 00:05:55,025
(sighs) we live together.
160
00:05:55,025 --> 00:05:57,357
There's no way of knowing
How we all got sick.
161
00:05:57,357 --> 00:05:58,829
Oh, my head is killing me.
162
00:05:58,829 --> 00:06:01,492
Your head, my head.
Oh, great. Here we go.
163
00:06:01,492 --> 00:06:03,734
Oh, my god.
I feel like I'm dying.
164
00:06:03,734 --> 00:06:05,396
It's too soon.
I didn't get a chance
165
00:06:05,396 --> 00:06:06,767
To teach max how to fish.
166
00:06:06,767 --> 00:06:09,470
I didn't learn how to fish.
167
00:06:09,470 --> 00:06:11,442
It's a cold, marty.
168
00:06:13,404 --> 00:06:15,506
Hey, sweetie.
The last weaver standing.
169
00:06:15,506 --> 00:06:17,948
How you doing?
(coughs)
170
00:06:17,948 --> 00:06:21,151
It got amber. Oh,
Sweet lord, it got amber!
171
00:06:21,151 --> 00:06:23,414
(weakly)
Mama, I want a burger.
172
00:06:23,414 --> 00:06:25,456
(weakly) kermit just ended.
173
00:06:25,456 --> 00:06:28,088
Somebody restart kermit.
174
00:06:28,088 --> 00:06:30,821
Oh, my god.
Honey, could you
Get me more soup?
175
00:06:30,821 --> 00:06:32,493
All righty.
176
00:06:32,493 --> 00:06:34,024
I will restart the video,
177
00:06:34,024 --> 00:06:37,167
Make you more soup,
And fire up the grill.
178
00:06:37,167 --> 00:06:39,770
Or I could have it raw.
179
00:06:39,770 --> 00:06:44,174
Abby, bloodlust
Is a bad color on you, baby.
180
00:06:45,906 --> 00:06:47,838
(bubbling and fizzing)
181
00:06:47,838 --> 00:06:49,980
Ooh! Fizzy.
182
00:06:49,980 --> 00:06:51,612
What are you doing,
Brother?
183
00:06:51,612 --> 00:06:53,444
If I tell you,
You have to promise
184
00:06:53,444 --> 00:06:54,815
Not to breathe
A word about it,
185
00:06:54,815 --> 00:06:55,986
Especially to father.
186
00:06:55,986 --> 00:06:57,648
I've gotten excellent
At lying.
187
00:06:57,648 --> 00:07:00,821
Yesterday, I told the weavers
I was going to do step aerobics,
188
00:07:00,821 --> 00:07:03,994
And they ate it up
Like sunday brunch.
189
00:07:03,994 --> 00:07:06,156
Amber weaver is sick,
190
00:07:06,156 --> 00:07:07,628
And I'm going to
Make her better.
191
00:07:10,160 --> 00:07:12,863
I'm going to cure
The common cold.
192
00:07:12,863 --> 00:07:13,934
Cool!
193
00:07:13,934 --> 00:07:16,036
I'm going to work
On my spins.
194
00:07:18,669 --> 00:07:19,670
Show-off.
195
00:07:24,044 --> 00:07:25,215
Ooh!
196
00:07:25,215 --> 00:07:27,618
Nursie.
What are you doing, mother?
197
00:07:27,618 --> 00:07:29,620
If I tell you, you have to
Promise you won't tell anyone.
198
00:07:29,620 --> 00:07:31,622
Especially not your father.
199
00:07:31,622 --> 00:07:33,724
I'm a treasure trove
Of secrets this week.
200
00:07:33,724 --> 00:07:37,588
Okay. Well, I am
Sneaking next door
201
00:07:37,588 --> 00:07:39,960
To nurture the weavers.
202
00:07:39,960 --> 00:07:40,961
My lips are sealed.
203
00:07:40,961 --> 00:07:42,132
Oh!
204
00:07:42,132 --> 00:07:43,894
Please, never wink again.
205
00:07:47,167 --> 00:07:48,999
Oh, lord of zabvron.
206
00:07:53,103 --> 00:07:54,905
(clock ticking)
207
00:07:56,146 --> 00:07:59,780
♪ someday we'll find it ♪
208
00:07:59,780 --> 00:08:03,183
You're ruining kermit
For me.
209
00:08:03,183 --> 00:08:04,755
Max, here's your tea.
210
00:08:04,755 --> 00:08:06,216
It's hot. Blow on it.
211
00:08:06,216 --> 00:08:08,188
Marty, here.
212
00:08:08,188 --> 00:08:10,260
Oh. (sighs)
213
00:08:10,260 --> 00:08:12,923
Mommy, are you okay?
214
00:08:12,923 --> 00:08:15,095
Well--
Mommy's fine, max.
215
00:08:15,095 --> 00:08:16,767
She doesn't have
What daddy has.
216
00:08:16,767 --> 00:08:19,099
Daddy has something
Much worse.
217
00:08:19,099 --> 00:08:20,971
(bell jingles)
218
00:08:20,971 --> 00:08:22,633
Honey, amber needs tissues.
(door closes)
219
00:08:22,633 --> 00:08:25,536
Are you serious?
Can you go this time?
220
00:08:25,536 --> 00:08:26,977
Baby, I really don't think
You understand
221
00:08:26,977 --> 00:08:28,539
What I'm going through here.
222
00:08:28,539 --> 00:08:30,080
I really think there's
Something wrong with me.
223
00:08:30,080 --> 00:08:34,044
Oh, there's definitely
Something wrong with you.
224
00:08:34,044 --> 00:08:35,986
That's what I said.
225
00:08:35,986 --> 00:08:38,549
(hisses)
226
00:08:38,549 --> 00:08:40,591
(inhales, exhales)
227
00:08:40,591 --> 00:08:43,123
I'm going to do
An inspection of the community.
228
00:08:43,123 --> 00:08:44,995
Make sure no one
Has fallen ill.
229
00:08:44,995 --> 00:08:46,727
Take your time!
230
00:08:46,727 --> 00:08:48,158
I absolutely will not.
231
00:08:48,158 --> 00:08:51,802
I have exactly
Half an hour of oxygen
232
00:08:51,802 --> 00:08:54,805
Before I have to breathe
Contaminated air.
233
00:08:54,805 --> 00:08:57,708
One half-hour.
(beeps)
234
00:08:57,708 --> 00:09:01,271
(door squeaks)
(breathes deeply)
235
00:09:01,271 --> 00:09:02,743
(door closes)
236
00:09:03,874 --> 00:09:05,676
(grunts)
237
00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:11,882
(hisses three times)
238
00:09:11,882 --> 00:09:12,883
(whispers) is father gone?
239
00:09:12,883 --> 00:09:14,054
All clear.
240
00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:16,186
(sneezing)
241
00:09:16,186 --> 00:09:17,758
Is this subject day?
242
00:09:17,758 --> 00:09:20,691
Yes. His name
Is janitor raymond.
243
00:09:20,691 --> 00:09:22,933
So, uh,
Where is this cold cure?
244
00:09:22,933 --> 00:09:24,635
In my room.
245
00:09:24,635 --> 00:09:27,738
I know a lot of people would
Say I'm crazy for coming here,
246
00:09:27,738 --> 00:09:29,740
But... (breathing heavily)
247
00:09:29,740 --> 00:09:30,971
But I feel lousy.
248
00:09:30,971 --> 00:09:32,603
And if there's
One thing I've learned
249
00:09:32,603 --> 00:09:34,805
From 30 years of cleaning
A high school crapper,
250
00:09:34,805 --> 00:09:36,977
It's that
You never underestimate
251
00:09:36,977 --> 00:09:39,309
A nerdy asian kid, eh?
(laughs)
252
00:09:40,781 --> 00:09:42,813
Jackie, what are
You doing here?
253
00:09:42,813 --> 00:09:43,954
There's no time.
254
00:09:43,954 --> 00:09:46,717
I have exactly 29 minutes
To care for you.
255
00:09:46,717 --> 00:09:47,888
What do you require?
256
00:09:47,888 --> 00:09:49,620
Chamomile tea.
More blankets.
257
00:09:49,620 --> 00:09:52,663
My pillow, please.
258
00:09:57,898 --> 00:10:01,231
Thank you, mrs. Joyner-kersee.
259
00:10:01,231 --> 00:10:05,906
(julie andrews'
"A spoonful of sugar" playing)
260
00:10:05,906 --> 00:10:08,608
♪ for a spoonful of sugar ♪
261
00:10:08,608 --> 00:10:10,841
(whimpers)
♪ helps the medicine go down ♪
262
00:10:10,841 --> 00:10:15,145
♪ the medicine go down,
The medicine go down ♪
263
00:10:15,145 --> 00:10:19,950
♪ just a spoonful of sugar
Helps the medicine go down ♪
264
00:10:19,950 --> 00:10:23,353
♪ in a most delightful way ♪
(blows nose)
265
00:10:23,353 --> 00:10:28,628
♪♪♪
266
00:10:28,628 --> 00:10:31,631
Aah...
267
00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:32,402
This is weird.
268
00:10:32,402 --> 00:10:34,665
I'm collecting
A sample of the virus
269
00:10:34,665 --> 00:10:35,766
To create a vaccine.
270
00:10:35,766 --> 00:10:36,767
Now we wait for it
To congeal.
271
00:10:36,767 --> 00:10:38,638
Who's the girl?
272
00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:41,371
Amber weaver.
She's sick, too.
273
00:10:41,371 --> 00:10:44,274
After we make sure this works,
I'm going to cure her cold.
274
00:10:44,274 --> 00:10:45,415
I knew she was
Getting sick this morning.
275
00:10:45,415 --> 00:10:46,817
Her cheeks
Were getting flushed.
276
00:10:46,817 --> 00:10:49,319
They're usually pale,
But not a bad pale.
277
00:10:49,319 --> 00:10:53,153
More a beautiful,
Milky pale.
278
00:10:53,153 --> 00:10:57,828
Oh, crap, I picked a romeo
Instead of an einstein.
279
00:10:57,828 --> 00:10:59,189
Thank you, jackie.
280
00:10:59,189 --> 00:11:00,731
(exhales)
I feel like the drummer
From santana
281
00:11:00,731 --> 00:11:02,392
Is playing a solo
On my brain.
282
00:11:02,392 --> 00:11:05,065
Ooh. I have
Exactly four minutes
283
00:11:05,065 --> 00:11:07,698
To get back home,
Lose the hat...
284
00:11:07,698 --> 00:11:09,870
(zips)
And practice my obedient wife
Face in the mirror.
285
00:11:09,870 --> 00:11:12,202
All right.
Jackie, it's so nice
286
00:11:12,202 --> 00:11:14,845
Having someone
Take care of me for once.
287
00:11:14,845 --> 00:11:16,246
Well, it's my pleasure.
288
00:11:16,246 --> 00:11:18,178
One more thing?
No, there's no time!
289
00:11:18,178 --> 00:11:20,751
Oh, I'm so sorry.
290
00:11:20,751 --> 00:11:22,152
I was hoping to get
Some more tea
291
00:11:22,152 --> 00:11:23,884
For my sore throat.
292
00:11:23,884 --> 00:11:25,716
But I'll get it.
293
00:11:28,118 --> 00:11:29,960
(groans weakly)
294
00:11:29,960 --> 00:11:33,363
D-no... (mutters)
295
00:11:33,363 --> 00:11:35,065
(exhales)
Okay.
296
00:11:38,068 --> 00:11:39,069
(clicks)
297
00:11:40,731 --> 00:11:43,003
(hissing)
298
00:11:43,003 --> 00:11:44,004
(door squeaks)
299
00:11:46,476 --> 00:11:48,408
(exhales) I'm back!
300
00:11:48,408 --> 00:11:50,981
Come on, boil already!
301
00:11:50,981 --> 00:11:54,284
Wife! Why aren't you
Greeting me?
302
00:11:54,284 --> 00:11:56,446
(whistles)
Whew.
303
00:11:56,446 --> 00:11:58,118
Hoo. Ha!
304
00:11:58,118 --> 00:12:00,891
Not my best entrance.
305
00:12:03,854 --> 00:12:06,156
Poppet! Where are you, cupcake?
306
00:12:08,829 --> 00:12:09,830
Ohh!
307
00:12:09,830 --> 00:12:11,431
Wife! Reggie!
308
00:12:11,431 --> 00:12:14,004
They're both
Doing step aerobics.
309
00:12:14,004 --> 00:12:15,465
What?
310
00:12:15,465 --> 00:12:17,838
But they're both at completely
Different skill levels.
311
00:12:20,310 --> 00:12:21,741
Oh!
312
00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:23,443
Wait. Don't!
313
00:12:23,443 --> 00:12:24,474
Dick.
314
00:12:27,477 --> 00:12:29,749
Hey. No. Stop.
315
00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:31,782
(stammering)
Dick, look,
I don't mind you playing,
316
00:12:31,782 --> 00:12:34,354
But please
Mind my shoes, ok--
317
00:12:34,354 --> 00:12:36,486
Cupcake.
318
00:12:36,486 --> 00:12:38,158
Dick said
You were exercising.
319
00:12:38,158 --> 00:12:41,031
Yes, I was.
And now I'm sleeping.
320
00:12:41,031 --> 00:12:44,795
You're all going
To send me to an early grave.
321
00:12:44,795 --> 00:12:46,897
Oh, don't be
Like that, muffin.
322
00:12:46,897 --> 00:12:49,870
Don't just lie there moping
In our water bed.
323
00:12:49,870 --> 00:12:51,942
I know you think I'm being
Overly cautious,
324
00:12:51,942 --> 00:12:55,305
But I'm responsible
For the entire community.
325
00:12:55,305 --> 00:12:58,478
And if anything should happen
To you and the boys...
326
00:12:58,478 --> 00:13:00,510
I know, husband.
327
00:13:00,510 --> 00:13:02,983
Thank you
For supporting me.
328
00:13:02,983 --> 00:13:05,956
Well, that's what
A good partner does.
329
00:13:05,956 --> 00:13:08,889
I've got
Your back, l.B.
330
00:13:11,161 --> 00:13:12,522
(sneezes)
331
00:13:20,230 --> 00:13:21,531
(sneezes)
332
00:13:21,531 --> 00:13:24,234
What was that?
333
00:13:24,234 --> 00:13:25,475
What was that?
334
00:13:25,475 --> 00:13:27,077
I said, "I love you"!
335
00:13:27,077 --> 00:13:29,940
Oh. I love you, too.
336
00:13:31,011 --> 00:13:32,482
(sneezes)
(water bed sloshes)
337
00:13:32,482 --> 00:13:33,583
Wait.
338
00:13:33,583 --> 00:13:35,285
You didn't say
"I love you."
339
00:13:35,285 --> 00:13:38,548
You emitted one of
Their sickness gasps.
340
00:13:38,548 --> 00:13:40,520
(clicks)
341
00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:43,393
What music were you listening to
While you were exercising?
342
00:13:43,393 --> 00:13:44,955
Santana.
Which album?
343
00:13:44,955 --> 00:13:46,426
"Santana live."
344
00:13:46,426 --> 00:13:48,498
Name a song.
"Hear my santana."
345
00:13:48,498 --> 00:13:49,900
Name all the songs.
346
00:13:49,900 --> 00:13:51,862
"Let's go to santana,"
"The santana banana,"
347
00:13:51,862 --> 00:13:55,005
"Santana me always,"
"Jingle bell rock."
348
00:13:55,005 --> 00:13:56,066
Okay.
349
00:13:58,108 --> 00:13:59,569
(clicks)
350
00:13:59,569 --> 00:14:00,570
(sneezes)
351
00:14:00,570 --> 00:14:01,872
(gasps)
(gasps)
352
00:14:01,872 --> 00:14:03,273
Ooh!
353
00:14:03,273 --> 00:14:05,515
Liar!
(groans)
354
00:14:05,515 --> 00:14:07,847
Ooh!
(gasps) grappling hook!
355
00:14:07,847 --> 00:14:10,050
(gasps)
Fine!
356
00:14:10,050 --> 00:14:11,451
(sighs)
357
00:14:11,451 --> 00:14:13,123
I went to take care
Of the weavers,
358
00:14:13,123 --> 00:14:15,225
And it was wonderful!
359
00:14:15,225 --> 00:14:18,028
I fluffed pillows,
I boiled water,
360
00:14:18,028 --> 00:14:19,589
I was a nurturing hero.
361
00:14:19,589 --> 00:14:21,061
Great.
Mm.
362
00:14:21,061 --> 00:14:22,392
Now I have to set up
An isolation tent
363
00:14:22,392 --> 00:14:24,164
In the backyard for you.
No.
364
00:14:24,164 --> 00:14:25,565
I am not getting in
An isolation tent.
365
00:14:25,565 --> 00:14:27,367
I will go back
To the weavers'
366
00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:30,640
To bask in the warmth
Of their germy camaraderie.
367
00:14:30,640 --> 00:14:34,604
Fine. Go sniffle and wheeze
With the phlegmy weavers.
368
00:14:34,604 --> 00:14:36,446
Fine. I will.
369
00:14:36,446 --> 00:14:39,309
Were you even doing
Step aerobics?
370
00:14:39,309 --> 00:14:41,251
How much of what
You tell me is a lie?
371
00:14:41,251 --> 00:14:44,414
"Jingle bell rock"--
Is that even a real song?
372
00:14:46,486 --> 00:14:49,059
Now that one of our own
Has gotten sick...
373
00:14:49,059 --> 00:14:50,190
(snaps fingers)
(switch clicks)
374
00:14:50,190 --> 00:14:51,891
We must take
Precautionary measures
375
00:14:51,891 --> 00:14:53,293
To the next level.
376
00:14:53,293 --> 00:14:55,595
We will be begging
The entire weaver home
377
00:14:55,595 --> 00:14:56,997
Until they're well again.
378
00:14:56,997 --> 00:14:59,429
Now I will need
Five people on stakes
379
00:14:59,429 --> 00:15:01,201
And five people on ropes.
380
00:15:01,201 --> 00:15:04,304
Now just call out
"Team stakes" or "Team ropes."
381
00:15:04,304 --> 00:15:06,306
It's first come first served.
382
00:15:06,306 --> 00:15:08,638
Or I'm happy to assign you.
383
00:15:08,638 --> 00:15:10,540
(under breath)
Someone just tell him.
384
00:15:11,611 --> 00:15:13,613
We don't want to tent
The weaver house.
385
00:15:13,613 --> 00:15:16,046
Jackie has the cold,
And she's fine.
386
00:15:16,046 --> 00:15:18,648
Plus, she gets to wear debbie's
Fluffy bathroom robe.
387
00:15:18,648 --> 00:15:20,690
(sighs) I'd kill
For ten minutes in that thing.
388
00:15:20,690 --> 00:15:23,623
And we watched debbie
While we quarantined the house.
389
00:15:23,623 --> 00:15:25,395
Nurturing looks wonderful.
390
00:15:25,395 --> 00:15:27,127
We want to nurse our friends
Back to health.
391
00:15:27,127 --> 00:15:28,298
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
392
00:15:28,298 --> 00:15:30,530
Fine! Go!
393
00:15:30,530 --> 00:15:32,402
Get sick!
394
00:15:32,402 --> 00:15:36,666
I will take my two sons,
And we will isolate ourselves!
395
00:15:36,666 --> 00:15:38,468
(murmuring)
396
00:15:38,468 --> 00:15:40,570
(door closes)
397
00:15:40,570 --> 00:15:42,542
Well, that was awkward.
(female zabvronian)
I'll say.
398
00:15:42,542 --> 00:15:43,673
(dings)
399
00:15:43,673 --> 00:15:45,615
Okay. Now you're cured.
400
00:15:45,615 --> 00:15:47,617
How do you feel?
401
00:15:47,617 --> 00:15:50,650
Nope. Not cured.
Still feel like crap.
402
00:15:50,650 --> 00:15:52,322
But "E" for effort.
Darn it!
403
00:15:52,322 --> 00:15:53,453
Let me try one more thing.
404
00:15:53,453 --> 00:15:55,225
Look, I gotta get home
To watch "Wheel."
405
00:15:55,225 --> 00:15:58,488
Not before I find a cure.
Yeah, relax, kid.
406
00:15:58,488 --> 00:16:00,260
Listen.
407
00:16:00,260 --> 00:16:03,063
When my wife and I
Play the lottery,
408
00:16:03,063 --> 00:16:05,665
She says to me, "Ray,
If this is our month,
409
00:16:05,665 --> 00:16:07,467
Let's buy an island."
(chuckles)
410
00:16:07,467 --> 00:16:10,970
Uh, she read some article
About how marlon brando
411
00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:12,702
Used to have an island
Of his own.
412
00:16:12,702 --> 00:16:14,574
It sounds wonderful, sir.
(clatters)
413
00:16:14,574 --> 00:16:17,277
Yeah. Yeah, it does.
414
00:16:17,277 --> 00:16:20,610
But odds are, I'm never
Gonna win the lottery.
415
00:16:20,610 --> 00:16:23,113
So every month when I buy
Our lottery ticket,
416
00:16:23,113 --> 00:16:25,455
I also get my wife
A postcard
417
00:16:25,455 --> 00:16:28,118
With a picture
Of an island on it.
418
00:16:28,118 --> 00:16:29,759
And I put it
On her nightstand,
419
00:16:29,759 --> 00:16:33,723
And when she wakes up,
We pretend we're there.
420
00:16:33,723 --> 00:16:38,728
Face it, kid. You and I--
We're no brandos.
421
00:16:38,728 --> 00:16:43,002
But I would give my anne
The moon if I could.
422
00:16:43,002 --> 00:16:45,405
And you don't actually
Have to cure
423
00:16:45,405 --> 00:16:47,607
The common cold
For your girl.
424
00:16:47,607 --> 00:16:51,781
Just make sure she knows
You would... If you could.
425
00:16:51,781 --> 00:16:54,084
Yeah?
(pats back)
426
00:16:56,786 --> 00:16:58,618
(groans and sniffles)
427
00:16:58,618 --> 00:16:59,749
(sneezes loudly)
428
00:17:01,591 --> 00:17:04,394
Oh, father. Uh, this isn't
What it looks like.
429
00:17:04,394 --> 00:17:07,397
It looks like you're embracing
A custodian with a cold.
430
00:17:07,397 --> 00:17:09,629
Okay. It's exactly
What it looks like.
431
00:17:09,629 --> 00:17:12,532
I'm setting up an isolation tent
For myself in the backyard.
432
00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:15,435
I will be alone!
I will be healthy!
433
00:17:15,435 --> 00:17:18,208
And it will be glorious.
434
00:17:18,208 --> 00:17:19,369
(door closes)
435
00:17:19,369 --> 00:17:21,311
(clock ticking)
436
00:17:23,613 --> 00:17:24,644
Honey...
437
00:17:24,644 --> 00:17:27,647
(groans) um...
438
00:17:27,647 --> 00:17:30,650
Marty, can you please
Just move your--
Honey! Honey, stop.
439
00:17:30,650 --> 00:17:32,782
Come on, I need rest.
I'm sleeping. Please.
440
00:17:32,782 --> 00:17:34,124
I'm sick, too, marty!
(coughing)
441
00:17:34,124 --> 00:17:35,625
Huh?
442
00:17:35,625 --> 00:17:37,727
You're not the only one
That feels like crap!
443
00:17:37,727 --> 00:17:40,130
And you never help
When we're all sick!
444
00:17:40,130 --> 00:17:43,062
You just turn into a whiny,
Helpless baby!
445
00:17:43,062 --> 00:17:45,235
But you're worse than a baby,
'cause you can talk.
446
00:17:45,235 --> 00:17:46,666
But you can't do
Anything else!
447
00:17:46,666 --> 00:17:48,268
So it's like you're old!
448
00:17:48,268 --> 00:17:49,669
But you're still a baby!
You're an old baby!
449
00:17:49,669 --> 00:17:52,542
You're benjamin button!
I'm benjamin button?
450
00:17:52,542 --> 00:17:54,744
I have a very high fever.
451
00:17:54,744 --> 00:17:56,746
(knock on door)
What now?
452
00:18:01,211 --> 00:18:04,214
("Rainbow connection" playing)
We come to nurture.
453
00:18:04,214 --> 00:18:06,286
(indistinct conversations)
454
00:18:06,286 --> 00:18:08,858
Who needs a blanket?
I'll get some soup going.
455
00:18:08,858 --> 00:18:10,360
All right, will.
456
00:18:10,360 --> 00:18:12,862
Let's see if you
Finally get it together
457
00:18:12,862 --> 00:18:15,265
And make a move on grace
This week.
458
00:18:15,265 --> 00:18:17,527
(male zabvronian)
More soup, coming up!
459
00:18:17,527 --> 00:18:19,329
(kermit the frog)
♪ why are there so many ♪
460
00:18:19,329 --> 00:18:20,870
(male zabvronian)
To help you feel better.
(indistinct conversations)
461
00:18:20,870 --> 00:18:22,872
♪ songs about rainbows? ♪
462
00:18:22,872 --> 00:18:27,777
♪ and what's on
The other side? ♪
463
00:18:29,509 --> 00:18:32,442
♪ rainbows are visions ♪
464
00:18:32,442 --> 00:18:34,814
♪ but only illusions ♪
465
00:18:34,814 --> 00:18:36,316
I brought you
A care package.
466
00:18:36,316 --> 00:18:38,588
♪ and rainbows have nothing ♪
To make you feel better.
467
00:18:38,588 --> 00:18:40,850
♪ to hide ♪
468
00:18:40,850 --> 00:18:42,422
(indistinct conversations)
469
00:18:42,422 --> 00:18:43,893
♪ so we've been told ♪
470
00:18:43,893 --> 00:18:47,897
♪ and some choose
To believe it ♪
471
00:18:47,897 --> 00:18:51,731
♪ I know they're wrong,
Wait and see ♪
472
00:18:51,731 --> 00:18:54,634
Kind, loving fools.
473
00:18:54,634 --> 00:18:57,237
♪ someday we'll find it ♪
474
00:18:57,237 --> 00:18:59,609
This is a copy
Of your favorite magazine.
475
00:18:59,609 --> 00:19:01,371
I cut out all the pictures
Of the "Twilight" kids,
476
00:19:01,371 --> 00:19:02,842
Because I know
They make you mad.
477
00:19:02,842 --> 00:19:05,745
This is a tupperware
Of mashed potatoes,
478
00:19:05,745 --> 00:19:07,717
Because you always get
A double helping
479
00:19:07,717 --> 00:19:09,619
When they serve them
In the cafeteria.
480
00:19:09,619 --> 00:19:12,782
And this is the one article
Of clothing I own
481
00:19:12,782 --> 00:19:14,224
You saydoesn'tsuck.
482
00:19:14,224 --> 00:19:15,725
I suspect you like
The texture,
483
00:19:15,725 --> 00:19:19,559
Because sometimes you touch
My arm when I'm wearing it.
484
00:19:19,559 --> 00:19:22,762
(exhales) okay. I'll go now.
485
00:19:23,893 --> 00:19:25,865
Hey.
486
00:19:25,865 --> 00:19:28,268
I can't reach it.
487
00:19:28,268 --> 00:19:30,770
♪ who said that every wish ♪
488
00:19:30,770 --> 00:19:34,204
♪ would be heard
And answered ♪
489
00:19:34,204 --> 00:19:35,645
Okay.
490
00:19:35,645 --> 00:19:38,208
♪ when wished
On the morning star? ♪
491
00:19:38,208 --> 00:19:39,949
(door closes)
492
00:19:39,949 --> 00:19:47,487
♪ ba da da da
Da dee da doo ♪
493
00:19:47,487 --> 00:19:49,559
(knock on door)
494
00:19:52,222 --> 00:19:54,324
Ooh.
(gasping)
495
00:19:54,324 --> 00:19:56,826
May I, um... (under breath)
Get anyone anything?
496
00:19:56,826 --> 00:19:57,827
Huh?
What did he say?
497
00:19:57,827 --> 00:19:58,928
(whispers) I don't know.
498
00:19:58,928 --> 00:20:00,730
I said...
499
00:20:00,730 --> 00:20:02,972
May I get anyone anything?
500
00:20:02,972 --> 00:20:05,675
Oh, my beautiful
And nurturing husband.
501
00:20:05,675 --> 00:20:07,807
I knew you wouldn't be able
To stay away.
502
00:20:07,807 --> 00:20:09,539
(coughing)
(grunts)
503
00:20:09,539 --> 00:20:10,640
(coughs)
504
00:20:10,640 --> 00:20:13,683
Uh... Maybe I could
Make a pot of tea
505
00:20:13,683 --> 00:20:14,814
For the infected.
506
00:20:14,814 --> 00:20:16,416
Where do you keep
The tea leaves?
507
00:20:16,416 --> 00:20:17,847
Oh, I'll show you.
508
00:20:17,847 --> 00:20:19,419
No. No. You know what?
509
00:20:19,419 --> 00:20:20,920
You stay, I'll go.
510
00:20:20,920 --> 00:20:22,922
Honey...
511
00:20:22,922 --> 00:20:24,554
I'm sorry I act like
Benjamin button
512
00:20:24,554 --> 00:20:25,995
Every time I get sick.
513
00:20:25,995 --> 00:20:27,827
It's just that you're so good
At taking care of everyone,
514
00:20:27,827 --> 00:20:29,829
It's hard not to
Take advantage.
515
00:20:29,829 --> 00:20:32,362
I know.
I'm like house m.D.
516
00:20:32,362 --> 00:20:35,004
No. Honey, house is also
A drug addict.
517
00:20:35,004 --> 00:20:37,607
You have to watch more tv
If you're gonna do references.
518
00:20:37,607 --> 00:20:38,868
Okay.
519
00:20:38,868 --> 00:20:40,440
I love you,
520
00:20:40,440 --> 00:20:43,713
My sick, phlegmy
Debbie weaver.
521
00:20:43,713 --> 00:20:45,545
Love you, too.
522
00:20:46,876 --> 00:20:49,449
(clears throat)
523
00:20:50,680 --> 00:20:52,021
Uh, honey, where do--
524
00:20:52,021 --> 00:20:53,883
Oh, my god, it's the second
Cabinet from the left!
525
00:20:53,883 --> 00:20:55,285
I know that!
526
00:20:59,659 --> 00:21:01,391
Are you sure you don't want
To write down the formula?
527
00:21:01,391 --> 00:21:02,992
What's the point?
528
00:21:02,992 --> 00:21:05,335
(water running)
529
00:21:05,335 --> 00:21:06,896
(coughing)
530
00:21:06,896 --> 00:21:09,299
(groaning)
531
00:21:09,299 --> 00:21:11,471
(groans and coughs)
(groans) honey!
532
00:21:11,471 --> 00:21:13,443
How you feelin'?
533
00:21:13,443 --> 00:21:15,545
Oh, I don't know, babe.
I still feel crummy.
534
00:21:15,545 --> 00:21:17,677
(gasps) wow!
(mug clatters)
535
00:21:17,677 --> 00:21:20,310
I knew it, babe!
Asian kids!
536
00:21:20,310 --> 00:21:22,312
(gasps)
Yeah! (laughing)
537
00:21:22,312 --> 00:21:23,683
(both laughing)
538
00:21:23,683 --> 00:21:25,385
(laughs) whoa!
Ahh!
37462
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