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1
00:02:24,060 --> 00:02:25,185
Who is she?
2
00:02:25,228 --> 00:02:26,436
Get into the kitchen!
3
00:02:26,729 --> 00:02:27,938
Adulterer!
4
00:02:28,356 --> 00:02:29,773
You're a monster!
5
00:02:31,276 --> 00:02:32,442
Swine!
6
00:02:32,944 --> 00:02:34,153
Who is she?
7
00:02:34,904 --> 00:02:38,365
Anna, I've told you
never to bother me here at work!
8
00:02:38,408 --> 00:02:39,783
Who is she?
9
00:02:40,702 --> 00:02:43,245
We have been through all that!
Get into the kitchen!
10
00:02:45,165 --> 00:02:46,915
Why didn't you come home last night?
11
00:02:47,083 --> 00:02:48,917
Leave me alone. I'm trying to work!
12
00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:50,377
Is she prettier than me?
13
00:02:50,753 --> 00:02:54,590
Is she prettier than you?
I'm prettier than you!
14
00:02:59,137 --> 00:03:02,598
- Lipstick on your shirt!
- Well, nobody's perfect.
15
00:03:02,849 --> 00:03:04,474
I know she's not the first!
16
00:03:08,438 --> 00:03:11,773
I hate you! I hate you!
17
00:03:12,692 --> 00:03:15,485
I've hated you
from the moment I first married you!
18
00:03:16,613 --> 00:03:17,988
You're grotesque!
19
00:03:18,531 --> 00:03:20,324
Lascivious adulterer!
20
00:03:20,950 --> 00:03:24,036
Don't you dare call me that again
until I have looked it up!
21
00:03:25,288 --> 00:03:27,789
Adulterer!
22
00:03:28,124 --> 00:03:30,042
Lascivious adulterer!
23
00:03:30,376 --> 00:03:32,461
Silence when you're shouting at me!
24
00:03:33,171 --> 00:03:34,630
Lascivious adulterer.
25
00:03:34,839 --> 00:03:39,885
Lasci..."Lascivious adulterer is a man
that is a lascivious adulterer."
26
00:03:39,969 --> 00:03:41,303
What kind of book is that?
27
00:03:41,638 --> 00:03:44,890
You're a monster
and a monster in that order!
28
00:03:45,225 --> 00:03:48,810
Fritz plays around with a floozy!
29
00:03:49,145 --> 00:03:52,314
Swine! Get out of my office!
30
00:03:54,734 --> 00:03:55,817
Will you get...
31
00:03:59,656 --> 00:04:02,449
I'll break every bone in your ox's body!
32
00:04:02,533 --> 00:04:03,617
Vermin!
33
00:04:04,827 --> 00:04:07,496
Do you realize I could slay you
any moment I like
34
00:04:07,747 --> 00:04:11,625
by using the great Bert's judo method?
35
00:04:21,427 --> 00:04:23,262
Get out of here. We'll finish this later.
36
00:04:25,515 --> 00:04:29,017
Don't be a bit surprised
if I take the children and leave for good.
37
00:04:33,439 --> 00:04:36,358
That great, rotten, stinking, horrible...
38
00:04:38,444 --> 00:04:42,572
Rotten, rotten, rotten,
big, fat, great, stinking...
39
00:04:42,699 --> 00:04:47,703
I hate you! I hate you!
I hate you! I hate you!
40
00:04:50,540 --> 00:04:51,665
Good afternoon.
41
00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:53,667
Am I late?
42
00:04:54,252 --> 00:04:56,545
No. As a matter of fact,
you are just on time.
43
00:04:58,881 --> 00:05:00,048
Come. Come.
44
00:05:00,758 --> 00:05:03,051
Make yourself nice and comfortable.
We will begin.
45
00:05:06,014 --> 00:05:10,934
Women have always been
a big problem to me, Dr. Fassbender.
46
00:05:12,645 --> 00:05:15,772
- Are you listening, Doctor?
- Yes, yes, yes. Go on. Go on. Go on.
47
00:05:16,566 --> 00:05:20,902
The first woman I had a crush on
was my school teacher,
48
00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:23,447
Miss Marks.
49
00:05:23,906 --> 00:05:26,700
Well, that's a perfectly normal occurrence.
50
00:05:30,538 --> 00:05:33,832
Did you read the essay I wrote
on my summer holidays?
51
00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:35,459
Yes, I did.
52
00:05:36,336 --> 00:05:39,171
I thought it was the most
moving piece I'd ever read.
53
00:05:40,089 --> 00:05:44,134
I hope you noticed
that I dedicated it to you, Miss Marks.
54
00:05:45,011 --> 00:05:46,345
Call me Tantaleia.
55
00:05:49,807 --> 00:05:53,060
Michael, this can't work.
I'm 34 and you're 12!
56
00:05:53,728 --> 00:05:55,020
Don't be negative.
57
00:05:56,064 --> 00:05:57,105
Michael.
58
00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:59,358
Michael, what's to become of us?
59
00:06:00,151 --> 00:06:01,777
And what did become?
60
00:06:03,029 --> 00:06:05,781
She lost her license and I failed English.
61
00:06:07,116 --> 00:06:10,118
Can I tell you what I once did
in a Latvian brothel?
62
00:06:10,953 --> 00:06:12,120
Later.
63
00:06:13,456 --> 00:06:17,542
My second experience with a woman
was no picnic either.
64
00:06:18,669 --> 00:06:19,753
It was at high school.
65
00:06:20,088 --> 00:06:23,173
What did I do? What did I do?
What did I do? What did I do?
66
00:06:23,257 --> 00:06:24,966
Someone tell me what I did. What did I do?
67
00:06:25,468 --> 00:06:26,635
Now, tell me what I did.
68
00:06:26,719 --> 00:06:28,595
Jenny? Jenny, will you tell me what I did?
69
00:06:28,971 --> 00:06:30,731
Jenny, will you tell me, please, what I did?
70
00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:32,743
What am I supposed to have done?
Please, tell me.
71
00:06:32,767 --> 00:06:34,203
Tell me what I've done. What have I done?
72
00:06:34,227 --> 00:06:36,413
No use looking like the day of judgment,
unless you tell me what I've done.
73
00:06:36,437 --> 00:06:38,980
What have I done?
Someone tell me what I've done!
74
00:06:39,649 --> 00:06:40,899
And did you do it?
75
00:06:41,317 --> 00:06:43,402
Well, I was untutored in these matters.
76
00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:47,531
But women have always overcome
my basic shyness.
77
00:06:48,157 --> 00:06:51,952
But you had a perfectly normal
sexual life at college.
78
00:06:52,161 --> 00:06:54,579
Normal? It was frightening.
79
00:06:55,873 --> 00:06:58,041
I was captain of the debating team,
you see.
80
00:06:58,835 --> 00:07:01,169
And I was competing
for the interscholastic championship
81
00:07:01,212 --> 00:07:02,838
by debating a Miss Pringle
82
00:07:03,464 --> 00:07:06,842
on the effects of socialized medicine
on the structure of British economy.
83
00:07:07,135 --> 00:07:10,178
- And what happened?
- I convinced her.
84
00:07:10,972 --> 00:07:13,432
Love is not to be found!
85
00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:15,725
It's not to be taken!
86
00:07:16,894 --> 00:07:18,019
It is to be given.
87
00:07:19,230 --> 00:07:23,650
You may despise simple faith,
but what is simple faith but healing?
88
00:07:24,152 --> 00:07:27,279
Abandon notions of socialized medicine.
What is socialized medicine?
89
00:07:27,363 --> 00:07:29,531
Medicine does not belong
to the Hypocritic Oath...
90
00:07:32,201 --> 00:07:34,995
And when did all this come to an end?
91
00:07:35,538 --> 00:07:37,581
It didn't come to an end. That's the point!
92
00:07:39,417 --> 00:07:42,711
My job is a lecher's dream.
93
00:07:44,755 --> 00:07:47,716
Feature editor for one of the biggest
fashion magazines in Paris.
94
00:07:48,426 --> 00:07:50,177
The receptionist is beautiful.
95
00:07:51,304 --> 00:07:53,180
- Good morning, Mr. James.
- Good morning.
96
00:07:53,473 --> 00:07:55,223
The copywriters are beautiful.
97
00:08:00,021 --> 00:08:01,396
The secretaries are beautiful.
98
00:08:01,439 --> 00:08:02,439
Morning.
99
00:08:02,523 --> 00:08:03,565
And the models...
100
00:08:04,066 --> 00:08:05,442
What about the models?
101
00:08:05,651 --> 00:08:06,902
Oh, my God.
102
00:08:07,111 --> 00:08:09,279
- Good morning, Mr. James.
- Good morning.
103
00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:12,491
Good morning, Mr. James.
104
00:08:12,742 --> 00:08:14,743
- Good morning, Mr. James.
- Hello, Gladys.
105
00:08:21,250 --> 00:08:25,462
Can you imagine what it feels like
to be in close contact every day
106
00:08:25,630 --> 00:08:27,714
with the world's most gorgeous women?
107
00:08:28,424 --> 00:08:29,466
And what can I do?
108
00:08:29,550 --> 00:08:30,926
I can't say no.
109
00:08:31,594 --> 00:08:32,844
And why should I say no?
110
00:08:33,012 --> 00:08:36,515
I love it, do you hear?
I love every second of it.
111
00:08:39,435 --> 00:08:40,936
That's how it's always been with me.
112
00:08:41,646 --> 00:08:43,730
A little pleasure, a little pain,
113
00:08:43,940 --> 00:08:46,024
but always back to the ladies.
114
00:08:47,652 --> 00:08:49,110
So, what is your problem?
115
00:08:50,613 --> 00:08:51,738
Carole.
116
00:08:52,031 --> 00:08:53,615
I met her at a language school.
117
00:08:54,116 --> 00:08:57,619
She wants to get married,
and I'm afraid to commit myself.
118
00:09:02,542 --> 00:09:04,751
- Do you love her?
- Surely.
119
00:09:06,796 --> 00:09:08,630
But you are afraid to marry her
120
00:09:08,673 --> 00:09:13,009
because you are not yet ready
to give up other women, yeah?
121
00:09:13,094 --> 00:09:14,094
Quite right.
122
00:09:15,930 --> 00:09:18,807
Then why don't you marry her and cheat?
123
00:09:19,350 --> 00:09:22,686
That's exactly what I want to avoid.
That's why I came to you.
124
00:09:22,770 --> 00:09:25,272
I respect her too much
to do anything like that.
125
00:09:26,148 --> 00:09:29,734
I think that, with you, sex is a sport, yeah?
126
00:09:31,529 --> 00:09:34,698
I love the... the smell of perfume
127
00:09:34,782 --> 00:09:37,784
and the thrill of the chase
and the moment of conquest.
128
00:09:39,829 --> 00:09:42,998
I like thighs. Do you like thighs?
129
00:09:45,251 --> 00:09:47,419
Look, I know you'll think this is crazy,
130
00:09:47,503 --> 00:09:52,048
but when the light hits me
in a certain direction, I'm handsome.
131
00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:59,556
Listen, I'll see you next Friday.
I've got a few phone calls to make.
132
00:09:59,640 --> 00:10:01,683
I haven't finished.
I've only been here 15 minutes.
133
00:10:01,809 --> 00:10:05,145
I can't take more than 15 minutes
of your sex life at one time.
134
00:10:05,521 --> 00:10:09,190
Look, why don't you come
to some of my group analysis meetings.
135
00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:13,486
Maybe if there's some other people around,
it's gonna be a lot easier for both of us.
136
00:10:14,196 --> 00:10:16,197
Hello, Zsa-Zsa? This is Fritz!
137
00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:19,701
How are you, my little flesh pudding?
Hold on.
138
00:10:19,952 --> 00:10:23,204
Listen, you'll like this group analysis.
It's a real freak show.
139
00:10:23,372 --> 00:10:25,165
If it gets dull, they sing songs.
140
00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:28,126
Well, do you think it'll help?
141
00:10:28,419 --> 00:10:30,337
I mean, I'll do anything to achieve Carole.
142
00:10:30,379 --> 00:10:32,589
If it fails, we will try something else
143
00:10:32,757 --> 00:10:35,425
because I use all kinds
of unorthodox methods.
144
00:10:35,551 --> 00:10:39,429
For example, I've had the greatest success
shutting people in dark closets.
145
00:10:41,057 --> 00:10:43,767
See you at the next meeting.
Bring with you 500 francs.
146
00:10:49,148 --> 00:10:52,776
Hello, my little laxative.
This is baby Fritzy here.
147
00:10:53,319 --> 00:10:54,903
He must be a genius.
148
00:11:36,112 --> 00:11:37,278
Victor!
149
00:11:37,530 --> 00:11:38,613
No, Victor!
150
00:11:39,448 --> 00:11:41,908
Michael James, meet Tempest O'Brien.
151
00:11:41,951 --> 00:11:42,951
How do you do?
152
00:11:43,035 --> 00:11:44,077
She adores me.
153
00:11:44,662 --> 00:11:46,705
He was cheating
because I beat him last night.
154
00:11:47,206 --> 00:11:48,415
We played strip chess.
155
00:11:48,582 --> 00:11:51,459
She had me down to my shorts,
and I fainted from tension.
156
00:11:51,961 --> 00:11:53,294
I want a drink.
157
00:12:00,761 --> 00:12:02,178
- Absinthe.
- Coffee.
158
00:12:02,638 --> 00:12:03,805
Mineral water.
159
00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:08,685
How's Carole?
160
00:12:10,271 --> 00:12:11,354
Did you find a job?
161
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:13,291
Yeah, I got something at the strip tease.
162
00:12:13,315 --> 00:12:15,233
I help the girls dress and undress.
163
00:12:15,818 --> 00:12:16,943
Nice job.
164
00:12:17,153 --> 00:12:18,236
20 francs a week.
165
00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:20,488
- Not very much.
- It's all I can afford.
166
00:12:22,658 --> 00:12:23,867
How's Carole?
167
00:12:24,410 --> 00:12:27,871
It's funny,
when the light hits you a certain way,
168
00:12:27,955 --> 00:12:29,414
you're so handsome.
169
00:13:11,707 --> 00:13:13,541
I was born in Boston city
170
00:13:13,584 --> 00:13:15,502
- Michael?
- Hello, pussycat.
171
00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:19,380
Pussycat, I love you.
172
00:13:21,967 --> 00:13:23,885
Thank you for another pot of flowers.
173
00:13:26,138 --> 00:13:27,180
Shall I get dressed?
174
00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:30,308
Or is it foreign-movie time?
175
00:13:30,893 --> 00:13:32,227
Foreign-movie time.
176
00:13:35,397 --> 00:13:36,856
Michael, you're a monster.
177
00:13:37,316 --> 00:13:39,067
Me? I'm not a monster.
178
00:13:39,276 --> 00:13:42,237
- Yes, you are.
- I'm your nice, warm lover.
179
00:13:43,239 --> 00:13:46,074
- What did you do today?
- Nothing. I slept.
180
00:13:46,742 --> 00:13:49,661
Do you know that people
sleep away a third of their lives?
181
00:13:50,037 --> 00:13:53,581
If a man lives to be 75,
it means he sleeps for 25 years.
182
00:13:54,708 --> 00:13:56,584
You know what it means
to sleep for 25 years?
183
00:13:57,211 --> 00:13:59,254
It means you wake up
with a shocking headache.
184
00:14:00,881 --> 00:14:03,383
Michael, I have to have a talk with you.
185
00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:05,343
- What about?
- Us.
186
00:14:06,762 --> 00:14:08,263
- Us?
- Yeah.
187
00:14:09,098 --> 00:14:13,518
That's a very touchy topic
because you get personal and start to hit.
188
00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:16,938
There's no reason why two people
can't discuss the subject of marriage
189
00:14:17,189 --> 00:14:19,357
without turning it into a third world war!
190
00:14:19,441 --> 00:14:21,943
We've discussed the subject
of marriage a thousand times,
191
00:14:21,986 --> 00:14:24,529
and you know my view. I'm a fascist.
192
00:14:24,613 --> 00:14:26,406
Now, I have to go to my house and change.
193
00:14:26,448 --> 00:14:29,200
But, pussycat,
you live in the apartment upstairs.
194
00:14:29,368 --> 00:14:30,451
I have to open your door,
195
00:14:31,036 --> 00:14:32,453
I have to climb a flight of stairs,
196
00:14:32,705 --> 00:14:34,414
I have to open my door, it all takes time.
197
00:14:34,582 --> 00:14:36,749
Listen, my parents are coming
to visit next week.
198
00:14:37,167 --> 00:14:39,002
They want to know
when we're getting married.
199
00:14:39,628 --> 00:14:42,046
My mother writes me every week
and asks the same questions.
200
00:14:42,339 --> 00:14:44,841
Hemingway began as a journalist,
and he broke away.
201
00:14:45,718 --> 00:14:49,012
I want to get serious. Plan a real future.
202
00:14:49,138 --> 00:14:50,889
I always hoped this job
would be temporary.
203
00:14:51,265 --> 00:14:53,016
All my friends are married.
They seem happy.
204
00:14:53,601 --> 00:14:55,268
I know there's a novel in me.
205
00:14:55,561 --> 00:14:58,104
No one's ever that sure.
It's time we made a decision.
206
00:14:58,188 --> 00:15:01,983
Even if it's a bad novel,
I've got to make a start.
207
00:15:02,318 --> 00:15:04,796
If you're not sure about marriage now,
you're never going to be sure.
208
00:15:04,820 --> 00:15:07,906
The worst curse in the world
is to be mediocre.
209
00:15:08,490 --> 00:15:10,992
- You're not listening to me!
- I am listening, indeed!
210
00:15:12,453 --> 00:15:13,661
Now listen to me, pussycat.
211
00:15:14,788 --> 00:15:17,040
Times are hard and I'm in a hurry.
212
00:15:18,584 --> 00:15:19,667
I have an appointment.
213
00:15:20,336 --> 00:15:21,980
If you can't be more definite
about the future,
214
00:15:22,004 --> 00:15:24,065
I think it's only fair
that we stop seeing each other.
215
00:15:24,089 --> 00:15:25,214
I'm not ready for marriage!
216
00:15:25,549 --> 00:15:27,050
Then how can you say you love me?
217
00:15:30,679 --> 00:15:31,763
Because I do.
218
00:15:34,016 --> 00:15:37,018
It wouldn't be fair to marry you now.
Do you see?
219
00:15:38,562 --> 00:15:43,191
I've got a lot of wildness
and fun to get out of my system.
220
00:15:44,401 --> 00:15:46,861
When we marry, we give up fun.
221
00:15:47,363 --> 00:15:49,155
You always have an excuse.
222
00:15:49,823 --> 00:15:52,575
Pussycat. We're children, you and I.
223
00:15:53,202 --> 00:15:54,744
Now's the time to live and experiment.
224
00:15:55,079 --> 00:15:57,372
Marriage is for life. It's like cement.
225
00:15:57,748 --> 00:15:59,540
But at that rate, it would drift on forever.
226
00:16:00,042 --> 00:16:02,126
We had this conversation
about six months ago,
227
00:16:02,252 --> 00:16:03,795
and I don't see anything changed.
228
00:16:04,588 --> 00:16:07,548
And when are you old enough
to assume the responsibility of marriage?
229
00:16:08,008 --> 00:16:10,301
At 25? 26? 28?
230
00:16:10,427 --> 00:16:12,303
32? 65?
231
00:16:12,429 --> 00:16:13,888
89? 90, 97?
232
00:16:14,098 --> 00:16:15,765
- 103?
- You're hysterical!
233
00:16:15,849 --> 00:16:17,535
Every time I don't agree with you,
I'm hysterical.
234
00:16:17,559 --> 00:16:19,852
- Pussycat, pull yourself together.
- No!
235
00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:25,984
- Give me the keys.
- No.
236
00:16:27,820 --> 00:16:29,362
- Give me the keys.
- No, take a cab.
237
00:16:29,405 --> 00:16:31,781
I don't wish to take a key.
I want my car cabs.
238
00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:34,617
I need the keys, the car.
239
00:16:35,494 --> 00:16:37,704
- You made up your horrid little mind?
- Yes, I did.
240
00:16:37,913 --> 00:16:41,165
All right, take the bloody car. I shall walk.
It's better for the heart. Taxi!
241
00:16:41,250 --> 00:16:44,085
All right, but don't...
Don't say I didn't warn you.
242
00:16:57,474 --> 00:16:58,641
Scotch.
243
00:17:06,275 --> 00:17:09,027
Excuse me, but haven't you
seen me somewhere before?
244
00:17:09,486 --> 00:17:12,071
I know the name,
but I can't remember the face.
245
00:17:13,115 --> 00:17:14,574
- California some time.
- Right.
246
00:17:14,950 --> 00:17:16,784
Give my regards to what's-her-name.
247
00:17:36,847 --> 00:17:37,972
Pussycat?
248
00:17:39,308 --> 00:17:40,433
Mr. James!
249
00:17:41,977 --> 00:17:43,936
What are you doing here?
250
00:17:44,354 --> 00:17:45,813
I'm paid to come here.
251
00:17:46,857 --> 00:17:49,692
- You're paid to come here?
- My magazine, you see, has...
252
00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:51,360
Yes, yes.
253
00:17:51,904 --> 00:17:53,237
And what are you doing here?
254
00:17:53,322 --> 00:17:56,866
What am I doing here...
255
00:17:58,786 --> 00:18:00,369
I am here as a...
256
00:18:00,913 --> 00:18:02,538
I'm here as a scientist, you know.
257
00:18:03,248 --> 00:18:05,041
Just merely as a scientist.
258
00:18:05,501 --> 00:18:08,294
Plumbing the depths of the soul.
259
00:18:08,670 --> 00:18:10,630
Doing a bit of plumbing, yes?
260
00:18:11,131 --> 00:18:12,298
Yes. Yes.
261
00:18:22,142 --> 00:18:24,852
I was so interested, you know, in your case.
262
00:18:25,354 --> 00:18:28,523
Intrigued me immensely
those things that you told me
263
00:18:28,607 --> 00:18:30,358
about what happened and all that.
264
00:18:31,026 --> 00:18:34,195
I... Well, I freely admit it.
265
00:18:34,238 --> 00:18:36,864
I decided to follow you here.
266
00:18:41,620 --> 00:18:44,413
Then, if you followed me here,
267
00:18:44,706 --> 00:18:48,000
how did you contrive to be here before me?
268
00:18:51,046 --> 00:18:54,048
I followed you very fast.
269
00:18:56,093 --> 00:18:58,678
Look, a point I've noticed scientifically,
270
00:18:59,263 --> 00:19:02,348
is that stripping is not sexy.
271
00:19:03,308 --> 00:19:05,560
No. Not in the slightest bit sexy.
272
00:19:05,894 --> 00:19:08,980
Listen, I can speak with a certain
authority on this because I...
273
00:19:09,565 --> 00:19:12,733
I've seen this show a hundred times.
274
00:19:14,403 --> 00:19:16,237
You've seen this show a hundred times?
275
00:19:18,907 --> 00:19:20,241
Then admit it, Mr. James.
276
00:19:20,492 --> 00:19:22,743
Admit that you come here
merely searching for love.
277
00:19:22,953 --> 00:19:24,203
I admit it.
278
00:19:24,580 --> 00:19:26,122
Well, I'm glad you admitted it.
279
00:19:26,415 --> 00:19:29,417
Otherwise, I'd have had to lock you
in a dark closet, you naughty man.
280
00:19:33,338 --> 00:19:34,547
That's beautiful.
281
00:19:49,146 --> 00:19:51,306
Victor, give me a hand with my armor,
will you, please?
282
00:19:54,860 --> 00:19:56,277
That's for the back, you fool!
283
00:19:58,155 --> 00:19:59,322
I'm sorry.
284
00:19:59,406 --> 00:20:00,615
Did I hurt you?
285
00:20:02,117 --> 00:20:03,743
Yes, I am. I'm going. Quick.
286
00:20:04,036 --> 00:20:06,662
I have tickets Saturday night
to a Lautrec exhibition.
287
00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:10,625
Toulouse-Lautrec.
One of my favorite small men.
288
00:20:11,668 --> 00:20:14,212
- Where's my robe?
- Lautrec is one of my favorite painters.
289
00:20:14,463 --> 00:20:16,881
- This is the back.
- I'm sorry.
290
00:20:20,844 --> 00:20:24,680
I know you would appreciate Lautrec.
He has a very sensitive line.
291
00:20:24,890 --> 00:20:27,808
He used color very sparingly,
but made his point with line.
292
00:20:28,310 --> 00:20:30,186
- The helmet.
- Yes, I am. Wait.
293
00:20:30,562 --> 00:20:32,813
Victor, will you help me
with my veil, please?
294
00:20:34,942 --> 00:20:37,318
Saturday night I have tickets
to a Lautrec exhibition.
295
00:20:38,111 --> 00:20:40,154
Toulouse-Lautrec.
He was a marvelous painter.
296
00:20:40,197 --> 00:20:42,156
I'm busy Saturday night. Hurry up, yeah?
297
00:20:42,532 --> 00:20:43,866
Do you like Lautrec at all?
298
00:20:44,117 --> 00:20:46,327
You put it the wrong way around, dear.
299
00:20:46,495 --> 00:20:48,829
- He was short, but fun.
- Let me do it alone.
300
00:20:49,081 --> 00:20:50,915
I'm sorry. We were all boys in my family.
301
00:20:51,667 --> 00:20:54,460
And now, ladies and gentlemen,
the Crazy Horse proudly presents
302
00:20:54,503 --> 00:20:56,504
Mademoiselle Liz Bien.
303
00:21:49,474 --> 00:21:50,850
Pussycat.
304
00:23:30,700 --> 00:23:32,326
Here is the place where you're working?
305
00:23:32,786 --> 00:23:35,996
I think there's something very exciting
about a place like this after hours.
306
00:23:36,123 --> 00:23:38,666
The empty seats, the smell of grease paint.
307
00:23:59,187 --> 00:24:00,354
Victor, what is that?
308
00:24:00,605 --> 00:24:02,365
I don't know. Nothing.
Probably just a short.
309
00:24:03,608 --> 00:24:04,775
What is it?
310
00:24:04,860 --> 00:24:07,220
I don't know, but I don't wanna be here
when it gets hungry.
311
00:24:08,029 --> 00:24:09,321
Victor, I'm scared.
312
00:24:09,781 --> 00:24:11,073
Don't panic. It may be nothing.
313
00:24:11,783 --> 00:24:13,075
Or you can panic now.
314
00:24:14,411 --> 00:24:16,162
Let's get out of here. Quick.
315
00:24:31,178 --> 00:24:32,553
My wife, I'll kill her!
316
00:24:32,888 --> 00:24:34,096
I'll kill my wife!
317
00:24:34,639 --> 00:24:36,724
Pardon me, drunk,
but you can't come in here.
318
00:24:37,058 --> 00:24:40,394
She makes a fool of me.
I'll kill her! I'll kill him!
319
00:24:45,108 --> 00:24:47,151
Why don't you go home and sleep it off?
320
00:24:48,028 --> 00:24:50,321
She cheats with him.
321
00:24:50,572 --> 00:24:52,573
I'll kill him! I'll kill him!
322
00:24:52,657 --> 00:24:54,074
- And who is he?
- Everybody!
323
00:24:56,203 --> 00:24:58,662
She cheats with everybody.
I kill everybody!
324
00:24:58,830 --> 00:24:59,955
I kill everybody.
325
00:25:01,750 --> 00:25:03,000
Poor man.
326
00:25:03,585 --> 00:25:06,587
Why does everyone have so much
trouble with being in love, Victor?
327
00:25:06,838 --> 00:25:08,088
It never seems to work.
328
00:25:08,381 --> 00:25:11,759
You love me, and I love...
I love Michael, and...
329
00:25:16,932 --> 00:25:19,058
Victor. I'm so mixed up.
330
00:25:21,019 --> 00:25:24,188
I feel marvelous
331
00:25:24,564 --> 00:25:26,398
I feel...
332
00:25:33,448 --> 00:25:34,990
I adore the way you dance.
333
00:25:35,367 --> 00:25:37,743
And I adore the way you look tonight.
334
00:25:39,621 --> 00:25:41,121
I've only got vodka.
335
00:25:41,206 --> 00:25:42,957
Vodka? Vodka's fine. Fine.
336
00:25:43,333 --> 00:25:45,793
When it comes to liquor,
I'm a health nut myself.
337
00:25:45,877 --> 00:25:49,463
I drink a lot of gin and wheat germ.
A great deal of vodka and gluten.
338
00:25:52,175 --> 00:25:54,301
- Please, don't.
- Why not?
339
00:25:54,970 --> 00:25:56,971
You came here to hear my poems.
340
00:25:57,639 --> 00:26:00,182
I did? I did! Yes, surely. But...
341
00:26:01,059 --> 00:26:03,227
You've been so affectionate, pussycat.
342
00:26:04,980 --> 00:26:06,146
You're on my foot.
343
00:26:07,023 --> 00:26:08,459
- I beg your pardon.
- It's all right.
344
00:26:08,483 --> 00:26:10,818
But I want to hear your poems.
345
00:26:11,528 --> 00:26:12,820
All right, but behave.
346
00:26:13,655 --> 00:26:16,740
Yeah, sure. I love erotic poems.
347
00:26:17,075 --> 00:26:18,826
It's not erotic. It's political.
348
00:26:19,661 --> 00:26:20,869
It is?
349
00:26:25,834 --> 00:26:29,253
I wrote this at Hillside Hospital
just after my fourth nervous breakdown.
350
00:26:31,089 --> 00:26:32,840
Two, three, four...
351
00:26:32,966 --> 00:26:35,968
"Who killed Charlie Parker?
352
00:26:36,636 --> 00:26:38,679
"You did. You rat."
353
00:26:39,556 --> 00:26:41,849
I dedicate this next poem...
354
00:26:41,891 --> 00:26:44,810
It's been an interesting evening,
but it's a little late for me now.
355
00:26:44,853 --> 00:26:46,854
Please, don't go.
356
00:26:48,315 --> 00:26:49,356
No?
357
00:26:49,691 --> 00:26:53,611
I'm beginning to grow
extremely fond of you.
358
00:26:54,738 --> 00:26:56,739
I get attached to people very quickly.
359
00:26:57,324 --> 00:26:58,407
I'm one of those women
360
00:26:58,491 --> 00:27:01,285
who can experience things
really deeply for the first time.
361
00:27:01,494 --> 00:27:03,579
Well, I don't fall in love easily either.
362
00:27:04,456 --> 00:27:07,374
I believe in adventure and experimentation
363
00:27:07,417 --> 00:27:09,293
and no attachments.
364
00:27:09,919 --> 00:27:11,378
I love that in a man.
365
00:27:12,005 --> 00:27:14,381
Well, I'm a great one for marriage, though,
366
00:27:14,466 --> 00:27:18,135
but I believe only after two people
have lived together.
367
00:27:19,679 --> 00:27:22,973
Intimacy before final involvement.
368
00:27:24,017 --> 00:27:26,060
How true. How true.
369
00:27:26,144 --> 00:27:27,704
Well, why are we reading all the poems?
370
00:27:27,979 --> 00:27:29,480
Look, I know a poem, too.
371
00:27:30,565 --> 00:27:32,650
"Had we but world enough, and time,
372
00:27:33,026 --> 00:27:36,487
"this coyness, Lady, were no crime."
373
00:27:38,615 --> 00:27:40,532
One more poem.
374
00:27:42,494 --> 00:27:45,245
And you can do with me what you want.
375
00:27:47,123 --> 00:27:49,917
- Victor, can I have a drink?
- Sure. What would you like?
376
00:27:50,251 --> 00:27:53,379
A triple scotch on the rocks.
Sometimes a drink will loosen me up.
377
00:27:55,882 --> 00:27:57,002
You've got something to eat?
378
00:27:57,175 --> 00:27:59,718
Some... some Fig Newtons,
379
00:28:00,178 --> 00:28:02,304
and some Hershey bars,
380
00:28:02,639 --> 00:28:04,264
and some cough drops.
381
00:28:04,683 --> 00:28:06,100
You got any tuna fish?
382
00:28:06,559 --> 00:28:08,102
Tuna fish, tuna fish...
383
00:28:11,856 --> 00:28:16,151
I have... I have some...
Some salmon salad left.
384
00:28:16,611 --> 00:28:18,451
What do you mean, "left"?
When did you make it?
385
00:28:18,863 --> 00:28:19,905
In April.
386
00:28:19,948 --> 00:28:22,074
But if you smother it with pepper, it's fine.
387
00:28:22,283 --> 00:28:23,325
What about an egg?
388
00:28:23,410 --> 00:28:24,952
An egg, yes. Wait.
389
00:28:28,456 --> 00:28:30,040
Yes, I have...
390
00:28:43,430 --> 00:28:44,596
Boy...
391
00:28:45,473 --> 00:28:47,725
You look... You look beautiful.
392
00:28:48,017 --> 00:28:49,810
I'm beginning to feel warm already.
393
00:28:50,854 --> 00:28:51,937
Thank you.
394
00:28:58,820 --> 00:29:00,779
I need a cigarette.
395
00:29:04,659 --> 00:29:09,329
I think there's something sexy about
the way some men smoke cigarettes.
396
00:29:13,334 --> 00:29:14,835
I just burnt my finger.
397
00:29:14,878 --> 00:29:16,558
I'm going to go
in the bathroom and scream.
398
00:29:16,588 --> 00:29:17,838
I'll be out in a minute.
399
00:29:22,677 --> 00:29:24,178
My finger!
400
00:29:38,359 --> 00:29:41,320
Forgive me, I...
I saw your lips standing there.
401
00:29:44,532 --> 00:29:46,533
I don't take you into the bedroom.
402
00:29:47,285 --> 00:29:48,827
I wait for you in bed.
403
00:30:22,946 --> 00:30:24,154
Here I come, dear!
404
00:30:26,533 --> 00:30:27,658
I'm all shaven.
405
00:30:28,993 --> 00:30:30,244
Everything's off.
406
00:30:35,083 --> 00:30:36,250
I'm here.
407
00:30:38,044 --> 00:30:39,211
I'm up here.
408
00:30:42,465 --> 00:30:43,590
Dear?
409
00:30:43,633 --> 00:30:44,800
Fragrance.
410
00:30:47,762 --> 00:30:51,014
Dear, are you okay? Is it...
I'm gonna get into the bed now.
411
00:30:52,559 --> 00:30:54,601
Dear! Come on, dear. Let's go.
412
00:30:54,853 --> 00:30:56,019
Here I am.
413
00:30:57,105 --> 00:30:58,730
What? Sweetheart?
414
00:31:00,108 --> 00:31:01,191
Here...
415
00:31:01,943 --> 00:31:03,235
Carole?
416
00:31:06,573 --> 00:31:07,781
Are you asleep?
417
00:31:08,616 --> 00:31:11,618
You're crumpled on the floor, right?
418
00:31:12,871 --> 00:31:14,037
All right.
419
00:31:14,122 --> 00:31:15,122
Good night!
420
00:31:24,007 --> 00:31:27,718
Listen, we're strangers, fella. Take it easy.
421
00:31:27,969 --> 00:31:31,805
Take... I was sitting there quietly
and you jumped on...
422
00:31:32,307 --> 00:31:33,307
How'd you like my poems?
423
00:31:33,391 --> 00:31:35,893
I think they're very beautiful
and quite moving.
424
00:31:36,311 --> 00:31:39,229
Did you like the one
about peaceful coexistence?
425
00:31:39,606 --> 00:31:41,523
"Ode to a Pacifist Junkie"?
426
00:31:42,066 --> 00:31:44,151
Yes. I thought it was very sexy.
427
00:31:45,403 --> 00:31:47,738
Well, actually,
the poem wasn't about sex at all.
428
00:31:47,822 --> 00:31:49,489
It was a plea for better housing.
429
00:31:49,824 --> 00:31:50,908
Now, look.
430
00:31:53,036 --> 00:31:55,537
I've got a sexual block. It's a thing with me.
431
00:31:55,788 --> 00:31:57,998
I don't wish to cause you any conflict.
432
00:31:58,416 --> 00:32:01,001
No, no. You're perfectly right.
433
00:32:01,502 --> 00:32:03,337
I must face up to the problem.
434
00:32:03,671 --> 00:32:07,007
I can't go on the rest of my life
being a semi-virgin.
435
00:32:07,425 --> 00:32:11,929
What, in the name of all that's gracious,
is a semi-virgin?
436
00:32:12,430 --> 00:32:14,681
Here, I'm a virgin. In America, I'm not.
437
00:32:15,058 --> 00:32:18,185
What do they do,
stamp it on your passport?
438
00:32:19,479 --> 00:32:20,854
Now, listen to me.
439
00:32:22,523 --> 00:32:24,900
I feel faint.
Would you excuse me for a minute?
440
00:32:24,984 --> 00:32:27,945
I'm going into the bathroom
to take an overdose of sleeping pills.
441
00:32:33,326 --> 00:32:34,618
I like you.
442
00:32:34,953 --> 00:32:37,496
You're a nice, stable girl.
443
00:32:42,043 --> 00:32:44,252
She'll be all right.
There's nothing to worry about.
444
00:32:44,796 --> 00:32:46,171
I thought she was joking.
445
00:32:46,255 --> 00:32:48,799
It was all poems, and "don't touch me."
She's weird.
446
00:32:49,217 --> 00:32:50,968
They're only Phenobarbital.
447
00:32:51,719 --> 00:32:52,970
She only had a couple.
448
00:32:53,554 --> 00:32:55,931
She came out of the bathroom,
and she looked very odd.
449
00:32:56,224 --> 00:32:59,726
And I gave her a little nibble. On the neck.
450
00:33:00,061 --> 00:33:02,604
Like that, you see.
And then she fell on the floor.
451
00:33:03,022 --> 00:33:04,147
- A nibble?
- A nibble.
452
00:33:06,943 --> 00:33:08,068
How are you?
453
00:33:08,486 --> 00:33:10,445
Sorry about that. I got panicky.
454
00:33:10,822 --> 00:33:13,740
Mademoiselle Belmont
will stay overnight if that's agreeable.
455
00:33:13,992 --> 00:33:15,075
Surely.
456
00:33:15,201 --> 00:33:16,493
Have a good-night pill.
457
00:33:43,312 --> 00:33:44,438
Pussycat?
458
00:33:54,449 --> 00:33:55,615
Carole?
459
00:33:57,660 --> 00:33:58,952
Miss Werner?
460
00:34:05,960 --> 00:34:07,294
Please, repeat after me.
461
00:34:07,587 --> 00:34:09,296
"The pen is blue."
462
00:34:09,714 --> 00:34:11,465
The pen is blue.
463
00:34:12,467 --> 00:34:14,426
"I go. She goes.
464
00:34:14,719 --> 00:34:16,136
"We go. They go."
465
00:34:16,471 --> 00:34:19,973
I go. She goes. We go. They go.
466
00:34:20,558 --> 00:34:22,976
Where were you last night?
That's all I want to know!
467
00:34:23,061 --> 00:34:25,979
Michael! Please, leave! I told you
not to come visiting when I'm at work.
468
00:34:26,147 --> 00:34:28,023
You didn't sleep in your room
that's for sure!
469
00:34:28,483 --> 00:34:31,651
Unless you're ready to get serious,
it's none of your business where I sleep.
470
00:34:31,736 --> 00:34:33,862
All right, we disagree on a point.
Let's discuss it.
471
00:34:33,946 --> 00:34:35,363
There is nothing to discuss!
472
00:34:35,490 --> 00:34:37,491
There is nothing to discuss.
473
00:34:37,575 --> 00:34:39,201
There is plenty to discuss!
474
00:34:39,494 --> 00:34:41,661
There is plenty to discuss.
475
00:34:41,746 --> 00:34:44,498
I am serious, and you are not.
Don't feel obligated.
476
00:34:44,832 --> 00:34:46,500
I love you, pussycat!
477
00:34:46,918 --> 00:34:48,794
I love you, pussycat.
478
00:34:48,836 --> 00:34:52,172
You've got a funny idea of love.
How do you treat people you hate?
479
00:34:52,256 --> 00:34:54,049
It's different for a girl.
480
00:34:54,175 --> 00:34:55,801
It is not! It is not different!
481
00:34:56,052 --> 00:34:57,761
If you can run around so can I!
482
00:34:58,137 --> 00:35:00,514
- You love me!
- You love me.
483
00:35:00,681 --> 00:35:03,350
I am tired of waiting around.
I've got my own life to live!
484
00:35:03,518 --> 00:35:05,685
Yes? Yes? Okay.
485
00:35:05,728 --> 00:35:07,187
You'll be sorry. You'll be sorry.
486
00:35:07,480 --> 00:35:09,439
- Good-bye!
- Good-bye.
487
00:35:09,690 --> 00:35:12,692
- You'll see, you'll be sorry.
- Good-bye, good-bye, good-bye!
488
00:35:12,860 --> 00:35:14,027
Good-bye!
489
00:35:14,112 --> 00:35:16,404
All right, sleep where you want!
See if I care!
490
00:35:16,864 --> 00:35:18,198
I sure as hell will!
491
00:35:18,574 --> 00:35:20,575
I sure as hell will.
492
00:35:21,452 --> 00:35:23,120
You bunch of parrots!
493
00:35:27,542 --> 00:35:33,171
"Life is a strumpet stained with wine.
494
00:35:34,132 --> 00:35:37,676
"Go to, I'll no more on't.
It hath made me mad.
495
00:35:37,885 --> 00:35:41,388
"I say we will have no more marriages!"
496
00:35:42,557 --> 00:35:44,057
Isn't that Schiller?
497
00:35:45,226 --> 00:35:46,476
Shakespeare.
498
00:35:49,564 --> 00:35:50,939
That man there,
499
00:35:52,984 --> 00:35:56,403
is the finest man that ever breathed.
500
00:35:56,904 --> 00:35:58,947
- Who is?
- He is.
501
00:36:00,533 --> 00:36:02,868
He is? Who is he?
502
00:36:04,162 --> 00:36:05,370
Who's he?
503
00:36:05,913 --> 00:36:09,249
I'll soon show you who he is.
504
00:36:09,292 --> 00:36:12,794
Hey! You must not strike me,
you naughty boy.
505
00:36:12,879 --> 00:36:14,254
You're my patient!
506
00:36:14,922 --> 00:36:16,423
That's who you are!
507
00:36:16,841 --> 00:36:23,471
And, anyway, I can lick any Freudian
psychoanalyst that's in this house.
508
00:36:23,764 --> 00:36:26,266
An analyst? I need help.
509
00:36:29,020 --> 00:36:30,645
And for me, please.
510
00:36:30,938 --> 00:36:32,355
Carole. Carole...
511
00:36:32,648 --> 00:36:34,566
I love her. She's beautiful.
512
00:36:34,942 --> 00:36:36,693
She wasn't at her apartment.
513
00:36:37,320 --> 00:36:40,822
And I've tried everything you said,
and it doesn't work.
514
00:36:41,073 --> 00:36:42,741
- Liz.
- Liz?
515
00:36:43,117 --> 00:36:44,492
She's a stripper.
516
00:36:44,869 --> 00:36:46,286
She's beautiful.
517
00:36:46,954 --> 00:36:50,290
And she's here on a Bongo scholarship.
518
00:36:51,292 --> 00:36:53,251
Why don't you introduce me to her?
519
00:36:53,502 --> 00:36:57,005
I could be the man
that sees no one touches her for you.
520
00:36:57,256 --> 00:36:59,925
No, no. I need help.
521
00:37:00,259 --> 00:37:01,426
Help.
522
00:37:01,469 --> 00:37:04,304
Don't mention that word to me. Help.
523
00:37:05,056 --> 00:37:08,058
That is what I need! Help!
524
00:37:08,809 --> 00:37:10,727
God, how I need that drink.
525
00:37:12,730 --> 00:37:15,065
Do you know
that I'm in love with a patient?
526
00:37:16,442 --> 00:37:18,568
I'm in love with a patient!
527
00:37:18,819 --> 00:37:20,403
- You got a minute?
- Surely.
528
00:37:20,655 --> 00:37:22,697
Let me tell you my story.
529
00:37:22,907 --> 00:37:24,157
Let me sit down.
530
00:37:29,538 --> 00:37:32,374
Carole is like a rose petal.
531
00:37:32,583 --> 00:37:34,793
So innocent.
532
00:37:36,212 --> 00:37:39,381
Can I tell you what happened
in my dream last night?
533
00:37:39,465 --> 00:37:43,635
I shall sell matches on the street corner.
534
00:37:45,137 --> 00:37:49,182
And I shall be the first
to buy some from you.
535
00:37:49,392 --> 00:37:50,684
Very civil.
536
00:37:52,979 --> 00:37:57,107
Miss Lefebvre!
537
00:37:57,650 --> 00:38:00,610
Every time she sees me she screams
538
00:38:01,279 --> 00:38:04,114
because every time she sees me,
I attack her!
539
00:38:04,991 --> 00:38:08,535
No, you must not attack her.
540
00:38:09,453 --> 00:38:11,746
You must woo her.
541
00:38:14,000 --> 00:38:16,710
- Woo her?
- Woo her.
542
00:38:21,007 --> 00:38:23,550
In Vienna.
543
00:38:24,885 --> 00:38:27,721
You must stand underneath her window.
544
00:38:28,139 --> 00:38:30,181
And I shall pretend to be you.
545
00:38:30,599 --> 00:38:32,851
And I shall pour your heart out.
546
00:38:33,185 --> 00:38:34,602
You lovely man.
547
00:38:35,688 --> 00:38:41,901
We shall halloo her name
to the reverberant hills.
548
00:38:42,361 --> 00:38:43,653
Lefebvre!
549
00:38:48,784 --> 00:38:54,205
You are, without doubt,
one of the finest men that ever breathed.
550
00:38:57,209 --> 00:39:00,670
Who is?
551
00:39:01,047 --> 00:39:05,592
I'll soon show you who is!
552
00:39:26,781 --> 00:39:30,492
I'm spying the next one,
553
00:39:30,951 --> 00:39:33,370
the third one up there. That one.
554
00:39:33,704 --> 00:39:36,498
We must attract her attention.
555
00:39:46,801 --> 00:39:48,134
Direct hit!
556
00:39:49,637 --> 00:39:50,720
Who's there?
557
00:39:52,181 --> 00:39:56,601
But, soft!
What light from yonder window breaks?
558
00:39:58,312 --> 00:40:02,524
My darling, your face
is like the pale autumn moon.
559
00:40:02,900 --> 00:40:04,192
You're joking!
560
00:40:04,568 --> 00:40:07,654
- I am not joking.
- I can't say that.
561
00:40:08,155 --> 00:40:10,990
- Why can't you say that?
- It's ghastly!
562
00:40:11,325 --> 00:40:12,492
Did someone call me?
563
00:40:12,576 --> 00:40:13,660
I did!
564
00:40:13,869 --> 00:40:19,416
Your Apollo, God of the sun,
is calling his aphrodisiac!
565
00:40:19,875 --> 00:40:21,126
I'm going to be sick.
566
00:40:21,168 --> 00:40:22,419
But who is there?
567
00:40:22,503 --> 00:40:26,589
My darling, your face
is like the pale autumn moon!
568
00:40:26,674 --> 00:40:29,509
My face is what? Now, who are you?
569
00:40:31,595 --> 00:40:34,597
Get out there and help me.
I love that woman!
570
00:40:34,682 --> 00:40:36,724
No wonder she thinks you're such a twit.
571
00:40:36,809 --> 00:40:38,017
Who are you?
572
00:40:38,394 --> 00:40:41,938
Not addressing you, sir.
Would you kindly leave the étagère?
573
00:40:42,648 --> 00:40:47,902
My darling, your face
is like the pale autumn moon, your face.
574
00:40:47,987 --> 00:40:49,028
Thank you!
575
00:40:49,113 --> 00:40:50,864
What did you say my face was?
576
00:40:51,407 --> 00:40:56,119
Your face is like the pale autumn moon.
Are you deaf?
577
00:40:56,537 --> 00:40:59,956
Don't speak to her like that, you rude man.
578
00:41:00,332 --> 00:41:01,958
Give us the nice things.
579
00:41:04,044 --> 00:41:05,587
What's going on there?
580
00:41:05,921 --> 00:41:08,548
I think someone is saying
your face is like the moon.
581
00:41:08,591 --> 00:41:09,841
My face?
582
00:41:10,134 --> 00:41:11,718
Not your face, you idiot.
583
00:41:12,052 --> 00:41:15,597
The face on the lady
what's in the top tower!
584
00:41:16,182 --> 00:41:17,307
Will you shut up?
585
00:41:17,600 --> 00:41:18,725
Come back to bed.
586
00:41:19,226 --> 00:41:22,812
Listen. Whoever you are, you are dull,
and I'm going in.
587
00:41:23,063 --> 00:41:24,783
- She's going in. Quick!
- We want to sleep!
588
00:41:25,649 --> 00:41:26,900
It is against the law.
589
00:41:26,984 --> 00:41:29,319
Will you please shut up? And go away!
590
00:41:29,403 --> 00:41:32,197
- Go home!
- And you, too, shut up!
591
00:41:32,239 --> 00:41:33,573
You're making noise!
592
00:41:34,074 --> 00:41:35,867
Everybody inside!
593
00:41:36,577 --> 00:41:38,953
Trickle back to your truckle beds.
594
00:41:39,455 --> 00:41:40,747
Everybody.
595
00:41:45,085 --> 00:41:47,337
Give her something romantic.
596
00:41:47,755 --> 00:41:50,423
Say romantic things to her.
597
00:41:51,550 --> 00:41:56,763
Your name is like a bell
that hangs in my heart!
598
00:41:58,390 --> 00:41:59,933
May it ring!
599
00:42:00,976 --> 00:42:02,393
And swing!
600
00:42:03,270 --> 00:42:06,981
Lefebvre!
601
00:42:09,109 --> 00:42:12,111
Miss Lefebvre! Miss Lefebvre!
602
00:42:12,446 --> 00:42:15,406
It's me, baby Fritz, and I love you!
603
00:42:18,452 --> 00:42:19,953
Police!
604
00:42:20,412 --> 00:42:22,080
Help! Help!
605
00:42:22,122 --> 00:42:24,999
Police! Go home!
606
00:42:38,556 --> 00:42:40,014
And now, group,
607
00:42:40,099 --> 00:42:43,685
whose emotional problems
shall we discuss today?
608
00:42:43,769 --> 00:42:44,936
- Mine!
- Me, me, me.
609
00:42:44,979 --> 00:42:46,396
No way! Mine, mine!
610
00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:47,480
Me, me, me.
611
00:42:47,523 --> 00:42:49,023
I've been coming here ten months,
612
00:42:49,108 --> 00:42:51,317
and we haven't discussed
my problem once yet.
613
00:42:52,403 --> 00:42:55,989
Perhaps if you'd be kind enough
to tell us what your problem is,
614
00:42:56,073 --> 00:42:59,117
then we could all have a go
at discussing it or something.
615
00:42:59,618 --> 00:43:01,202
I can't. It's dirty.
616
00:43:02,121 --> 00:43:07,917
Weren't we discussing last week
Mr. Durrell's relationship with his father?
617
00:43:08,085 --> 00:43:09,794
No. Actually, we were discussing
618
00:43:09,837 --> 00:43:12,672
the dream about the train
entering the tunnel.
619
00:43:13,465 --> 00:43:15,505
Yeah. The train and the tunnel.
That was a good one.
620
00:43:17,344 --> 00:43:19,095
By the way, ladies and gentlemen,
621
00:43:19,513 --> 00:43:22,432
we have with us today
a new member of our group.
622
00:43:23,100 --> 00:43:26,311
He's a young man
who's got certain emotional problems.
623
00:43:26,437 --> 00:43:30,273
All your life, you should have
such problems as this young man has got.
624
00:43:30,524 --> 00:43:32,942
He's the editor
of a well-known fashion magazine.
625
00:43:33,152 --> 00:43:37,196
I'm referring to none other
than Mr. Michael James.
626
00:43:43,996 --> 00:43:48,499
I haven't been sleeping very well,
and I if I go without it,
627
00:43:48,542 --> 00:43:53,713
I find that quite often I fall asleep.
628
00:43:54,548 --> 00:43:55,882
Carole is my girlfriend.
629
00:43:56,008 --> 00:43:59,218
She's part of the whole perishing thing.
630
00:43:59,595 --> 00:44:04,098
She... lies... puts me on the bed.
She... on the bed.
631
00:44:04,475 --> 00:44:06,643
And sometimes she misses
and I go under the bed.
632
00:44:07,061 --> 00:44:09,771
But this is what we describe as a pot shot.
633
00:44:10,272 --> 00:44:11,648
And it doesn't count.
634
00:44:16,654 --> 00:44:17,737
Mr. Trills.
635
00:44:17,821 --> 00:44:22,075
Control your knees immediately,
or I will have them shaved within the hour!
636
00:44:22,910 --> 00:44:24,994
Mr. Trills! Have you no shame?
637
00:44:25,245 --> 00:44:27,664
Why do you keep attacking
my new members in this way?
638
00:44:27,831 --> 00:44:29,374
You great, fat Moby Dick.
639
00:44:30,376 --> 00:44:34,962
- When it's springtime in Vienna.
- Doctor!
640
00:44:35,047 --> 00:44:37,757
Trills is a paranoiac.
He sleeps with a light on in his room.
641
00:44:37,925 --> 00:44:39,342
- Pansy.
- Nail biter.
642
00:44:39,426 --> 00:44:42,970
- Doctor, I prefer the sickness to the cure!
- These are early days.
643
00:44:43,055 --> 00:44:44,866
Didn't you say something nice
about a dark closet?
644
00:44:44,890 --> 00:44:46,933
Yes. Very good idea. I've got one over here.
645
00:44:47,059 --> 00:44:48,685
Goody! Another free-for-all.
646
00:44:49,812 --> 00:44:52,772
It's a raid! Run for your lives!
647
00:44:54,692 --> 00:44:58,945
Miss Lefebvre,
you look positively ravishing in that face.
648
00:44:59,029 --> 00:45:00,446
Thank you, Herr Professor.
649
00:45:01,573 --> 00:45:02,949
Group, listen.
650
00:45:03,242 --> 00:45:06,828
I have some marvelous, fresh
emotional experiences to tell you about.
651
00:45:07,413 --> 00:45:09,622
You see, the other day...
652
00:45:16,964 --> 00:45:19,382
He told me any time
I had trouble controlling myself,
653
00:45:19,466 --> 00:45:20,675
I should blow the whistle.
654
00:45:21,009 --> 00:45:24,429
You have trouble controlling yourself?
655
00:45:25,973 --> 00:45:27,306
Only with men.
656
00:45:28,142 --> 00:45:31,769
I have an intense need to be loved
by many men many times.
657
00:45:32,146 --> 00:45:33,396
Really?
658
00:45:34,273 --> 00:45:35,940
A little wine would you care for?
659
00:45:35,983 --> 00:45:37,150
Yes.
660
00:45:37,443 --> 00:45:40,153
You'd never know
by your placid exterior that,
661
00:45:40,237 --> 00:45:41,988
underneath that ice-cold facade,
662
00:45:42,030 --> 00:45:47,368
beats the heart of a savage,
lustful, passionate animal.
663
00:45:59,840 --> 00:46:02,508
What will you have for breakfast
tomorrow morning?
664
00:46:02,593 --> 00:46:05,261
Orange juice, tea and toast.
665
00:46:06,346 --> 00:46:09,807
I have to call someone and tell them
I will not be home tonight.
666
00:46:10,476 --> 00:46:13,978
The phone's down by the bed.
Next to my prayer shawl.
667
00:46:44,551 --> 00:46:46,886
- I'm sorry about the fight.
- What?
668
00:46:47,304 --> 00:46:50,389
- I decided you were right.
- What, what, what, what?
669
00:46:50,766 --> 00:46:54,060
- About some things.
- What... what did you decide?
670
00:46:54,770 --> 00:46:55,978
I'm moving in with you.
671
00:46:56,313 --> 00:46:57,522
You're moving in with me?
672
00:46:57,564 --> 00:47:00,399
Yes. What in the hell
is the matter with you?
673
00:47:00,859 --> 00:47:03,361
You're now moving in? You? In moving?
674
00:47:03,403 --> 00:47:06,572
Yes. Yes.
I am sick of wasting anymore time.
675
00:47:06,615 --> 00:47:09,367
You're now moving in?
Moving in, you. You've decided...
676
00:47:09,409 --> 00:47:10,743
Yes. Darling, listen.
677
00:47:10,828 --> 00:47:14,413
If we were maybe living together
like husband and wife,
678
00:47:14,498 --> 00:47:17,583
maybe you'd see
it wasn't all horrible after all.
679
00:47:18,001 --> 00:47:20,169
But it is. It's horrible.
680
00:47:20,337 --> 00:47:23,089
- Michael!
- Look, go downstairs, pussycat.
681
00:47:23,131 --> 00:47:26,467
I'll join you in a little while,
and we'll have a nice fight.
682
00:47:27,636 --> 00:47:30,471
You don't want me here for a reason.
You're covering up.
683
00:47:30,556 --> 00:47:32,765
No. I want the moment to be right!
684
00:47:36,270 --> 00:47:38,896
I want it to be a special occasion.
685
00:47:40,607 --> 00:47:42,687
You said your mother and father
are coming next week.
686
00:47:42,985 --> 00:47:45,987
Do you want the four of us
to celebrate us two living out of wedlock?
687
00:47:46,071 --> 00:47:47,780
No, I don't think they'd appreciate it.
688
00:47:48,073 --> 00:47:49,448
Let's discuss it later.
689
00:47:56,415 --> 00:47:57,748
Something's wrong.
690
00:47:58,292 --> 00:47:59,542
Some place.
691
00:48:07,134 --> 00:48:09,468
Well! Look what's sleeping in your bed.
692
00:48:10,470 --> 00:48:12,847
As a man's life goes down the drain,
693
00:48:13,807 --> 00:48:15,141
you are there.
694
00:48:19,897 --> 00:48:21,647
Dear! All this work I've got to do!
695
00:48:22,649 --> 00:48:25,943
Wash the dishes, polish the furniture,
do this, do that.
696
00:48:26,486 --> 00:48:28,362
I say, I do earn my pay.
697
00:48:33,827 --> 00:48:34,827
Here we go, cock.
698
00:48:35,370 --> 00:48:36,704
Spotless we must be.
699
00:48:49,551 --> 00:48:51,344
Pussycat, I can please explain.
700
00:48:52,554 --> 00:48:55,056
Michael, I had to see you.
701
00:48:55,140 --> 00:48:58,351
You haven't called me
since that last fantastic night.
702
00:48:59,561 --> 00:49:01,729
You hyperthyroid.
703
00:49:02,481 --> 00:49:04,065
Carole! Look, I love you!
704
00:49:04,358 --> 00:49:07,193
I love you, Carole! It's not what it seems.
705
00:49:07,277 --> 00:49:09,028
I'm opening up a seminary!
706
00:49:12,199 --> 00:49:15,034
Begging your pardon.
I'm going to find the john.
707
00:49:22,626 --> 00:49:24,543
There it is. Fine. Good.
708
00:49:29,091 --> 00:49:30,716
Oh, my.
709
00:49:32,803 --> 00:49:35,012
Another plea of no success.
710
00:49:40,102 --> 00:49:42,770
Hello? Help? Succor. Emergency ward. Yes.
711
00:49:42,854 --> 00:49:46,524
My name is Michael James.
Je suis Michael James.
712
00:49:49,736 --> 00:49:51,070
Well, she...
713
00:49:55,867 --> 00:49:58,119
Just relax. That's fine.
714
00:49:58,203 --> 00:49:59,578
Take it easy, now.
715
00:50:00,247 --> 00:50:01,747
I'm sorry.
716
00:50:03,500 --> 00:50:06,168
May I ask what is
your relationship to this girl?
717
00:50:06,420 --> 00:50:07,753
Are you her fiancé?
718
00:50:07,921 --> 00:50:10,506
No. I'm just a friend.
719
00:50:11,008 --> 00:50:13,259
It's a pretty rocky friendship you've got.
720
00:50:25,439 --> 00:50:26,772
Pussycat?
721
00:50:47,210 --> 00:50:49,545
Do you think
that you could love a short man?
722
00:50:50,130 --> 00:50:52,423
I mean, if he had very attractive red hair?
723
00:50:52,632 --> 00:50:54,258
Victor, I adore you.
724
00:50:55,969 --> 00:50:58,929
Collected Poems of Shelley?
I always wanted to read...
725
00:50:58,972 --> 00:51:01,015
Sorry. I saw Shelley first.
726
00:51:01,308 --> 00:51:03,601
You did not! I saw it first!
727
00:51:03,643 --> 00:51:05,603
Like hell you did. It's mine!
728
00:51:06,521 --> 00:51:08,856
Victor, you're not going to
let him take that book!
729
00:51:10,984 --> 00:51:12,985
Actually, she did see the book first.
730
00:51:13,070 --> 00:51:14,070
Beat it.
731
00:51:14,988 --> 00:51:17,073
Victor, thrash him.
732
00:51:17,240 --> 00:51:18,616
Come on. Go.
733
00:51:20,118 --> 00:51:21,494
What is it? Go on!
734
00:51:30,295 --> 00:51:32,379
I have a bad head cold.
735
00:51:32,756 --> 00:51:35,341
Victor, you always said
you'd go through hell for me.
736
00:51:35,425 --> 00:51:36,592
Go on.
737
00:51:38,053 --> 00:51:40,346
You see this guy's knuckles? They're huge!
738
00:51:40,388 --> 00:51:43,349
You're not going to stand there
and let that man insult your woman!
739
00:51:43,391 --> 00:51:47,019
My woman? You're Michael's woman.
In fact, why don't I get him now.
740
00:51:47,062 --> 00:51:48,646
He could be here in five minutes.
741
00:51:48,814 --> 00:51:50,648
If you have any hopes for ever winning me,
742
00:51:50,690 --> 00:51:53,818
now is the moment to prove it.
Go on. Get him. Go on.
743
00:51:54,111 --> 00:51:55,402
Go on!
744
00:52:01,618 --> 00:52:02,952
Come on, Victor!
745
00:52:03,703 --> 00:52:05,788
Kick him! Kick him!
746
00:52:06,248 --> 00:52:07,498
Give it!
747
00:52:07,916 --> 00:52:09,583
- Give me this book.
- No!
748
00:52:09,668 --> 00:52:11,794
- Give me that book!
- No.
749
00:52:12,379 --> 00:52:14,380
Go on. Victor!
750
00:52:15,924 --> 00:52:18,217
Get him. Go! Kick him now!
751
00:52:19,386 --> 00:52:22,388
- Now you give me that book!
- No! You are not a gentleman!
752
00:52:22,430 --> 00:52:24,014
- I am a gentleman.
- No, you are not.
753
00:52:24,057 --> 00:52:25,349
Yes, I'm a gentleman.
754
00:52:26,560 --> 00:52:29,228
Victor, show him! Kick him! Hit him!
755
00:52:38,572 --> 00:52:40,114
You're so brave, I'm shocked.
756
00:52:43,952 --> 00:52:45,035
Victor...
757
00:52:46,621 --> 00:52:48,122
I must have Carole.
758
00:52:49,416 --> 00:52:51,667
I need her, I love her,
759
00:52:52,252 --> 00:52:54,378
she's the whole world to me,
and she's mine.
760
00:52:55,380 --> 00:52:57,590
The only way anyone
can take her away from me,
761
00:52:58,300 --> 00:52:59,758
is by killing me.
762
00:53:03,263 --> 00:53:04,972
I've decided what I'm going to do.
763
00:53:05,807 --> 00:53:08,267
I've been seeing
the best psychoanalyst in Paris.
764
00:53:08,935 --> 00:53:10,269
He's a genius.
765
00:53:10,770 --> 00:53:13,439
And he wants me to go
to his group analysis courses.
766
00:53:14,316 --> 00:53:15,858
Well, I've been going.
767
00:53:16,401 --> 00:53:17,776
I'm going to keep on going.
768
00:53:19,237 --> 00:53:20,613
And I'm gonna fight!
769
00:53:21,072 --> 00:53:22,448
And I'm going to win!
770
00:53:23,116 --> 00:53:24,450
Because I love her!
771
00:53:30,874 --> 00:53:33,083
A little central steam
does one a world of good.
772
00:53:36,963 --> 00:53:39,798
Must have physical health
as well as mental health.
773
00:53:40,467 --> 00:53:41,967
I'm kinky with steaming.
774
00:53:42,260 --> 00:53:45,971
I was born in Boston city
775
00:53:46,097 --> 00:53:49,475
Boys, a place you all know well
776
00:53:49,768 --> 00:53:50,976
Are you well, Victor?
777
00:53:51,978 --> 00:53:54,396
Brought up by honest parents
778
00:53:54,481 --> 00:53:57,900
And the truth to you I'll tell
779
00:53:57,984 --> 00:54:01,153
Brought up by honest parents
780
00:54:01,696 --> 00:54:03,489
How do we get out of here?
781
00:54:04,991 --> 00:54:06,575
Get away from the door!
782
00:54:06,660 --> 00:54:07,826
I can't open it!
783
00:54:09,621 --> 00:54:12,414
Then, Doctor, when I was 15 years old,
784
00:54:12,582 --> 00:54:14,959
I had to tell my parents they were adopted.
785
00:54:15,335 --> 00:54:18,629
We fought, I stopped coming home
and moved out.
786
00:54:19,130 --> 00:54:20,339
So you turned promiscuous?
787
00:54:20,548 --> 00:54:23,676
Well! I love that in a woman.
I love it, I love it.
788
00:54:23,843 --> 00:54:26,595
You see, I can't help it.
I'm a physical woman.
789
00:54:27,013 --> 00:54:28,639
I feel guilty about it.
790
00:54:29,307 --> 00:54:32,309
But I come from a family
of acute nymphomaniacs
791
00:54:32,352 --> 00:54:35,020
that includes my father
and my two brothers.
792
00:54:35,105 --> 00:54:37,606
Why don't we all take off our clothes.
It's so modern.
793
00:54:37,691 --> 00:54:39,191
For instance, Doctor.
794
00:54:39,234 --> 00:54:40,317
What?
795
00:54:41,069 --> 00:54:43,779
I find myself extremely attracted
796
00:54:44,656 --> 00:54:46,323
to Mr. James.
797
00:54:46,533 --> 00:54:48,701
And the fact that
he's in love with someone else
798
00:54:48,785 --> 00:54:50,035
excites me even more.
799
00:54:51,454 --> 00:54:54,540
What is it that you see in him
that you don't see in me?
800
00:54:54,624 --> 00:54:55,874
I don't know.
801
00:54:56,042 --> 00:54:58,377
But there is something about his face.
802
00:54:59,713 --> 00:55:03,465
When the light hits him a certain way,
he's almost handsome.
803
00:55:03,550 --> 00:55:04,883
Look, you're very lovely.
804
00:55:05,260 --> 00:55:07,697
But I've come here to get rid
of problems, not to acquire them.
805
00:55:07,721 --> 00:55:11,598
Mirror, mirror, on the wall,
who is the handsomest of them all?
806
00:55:12,183 --> 00:55:13,225
I am.
807
00:55:13,310 --> 00:55:14,727
- No, I am.
- I am!
808
00:55:15,061 --> 00:55:17,521
- I am!
- I am! Really!
809
00:55:17,731 --> 00:55:21,400
Group, in Britain,
we have a national therapy.
810
00:55:21,568 --> 00:55:24,320
We call it cricket.
811
00:55:25,363 --> 00:55:28,449
Unlike other sports,
it doesn't involve anxieties or pressures.
812
00:55:28,533 --> 00:55:31,076
It's leisurely and lyrical.
813
00:55:31,536 --> 00:55:35,247
It's the song of willow on leather.
814
00:55:37,417 --> 00:55:39,001
Is there any sex in it?
815
00:55:39,711 --> 00:55:44,089
No. This is a game for gentlemen,
played by gentlemen.
816
00:55:44,466 --> 00:55:46,258
It's sick. Sick!
817
00:55:48,136 --> 00:55:51,472
Miss Lefebvre,
tell me something about yourself.
818
00:55:51,556 --> 00:55:53,223
He's really elegant, isn't he?
819
00:55:53,850 --> 00:55:55,517
Do something for me, Doctor.
820
00:56:00,857 --> 00:56:03,618
Can't you throw those girls away?
I don't like those girls around him.
821
00:56:05,695 --> 00:56:07,488
Lay here and watch your...
822
00:56:07,947 --> 00:56:11,533
Watch your champion from a good... Here...
823
00:56:12,118 --> 00:56:13,452
Vantage point.
824
00:56:13,495 --> 00:56:15,162
There, now. On my shoulder.
825
00:56:15,246 --> 00:56:18,082
- Can't you see him better?
- Yes. Yes, I can.
826
00:56:18,124 --> 00:56:21,752
Feel all those lovely strokes...
strokes he's pulling?
827
00:56:24,756 --> 00:56:26,590
Couldn't you arrange something for me?
828
00:56:26,758 --> 00:56:27,966
What would you like?
829
00:56:28,134 --> 00:56:30,761
To have a session, just the three of us.
830
00:56:30,804 --> 00:56:34,223
What a little bowling and a little batting?
Something like that?
831
00:56:34,307 --> 00:56:36,475
No. A more intimate game, you know.
832
00:56:36,851 --> 00:56:38,977
I mean, when are they going to finish? It's...
833
00:56:39,521 --> 00:56:42,731
- I'm getting very nervous.
- I find this game scintillating and exciting.
834
00:56:43,149 --> 00:56:46,860
But I'd like the game to be over.
I'd like to play something else.
835
00:56:47,153 --> 00:56:48,779
- Some other game?
- Yes.
836
00:56:48,822 --> 00:56:50,656
Well, that's interesting, too.
837
00:56:55,078 --> 00:56:57,246
Can you see the bowler?
That's a good thing.
838
00:56:57,330 --> 00:57:00,666
- Don't look at the batsman.
- No, I love the batsman better.
839
00:57:00,708 --> 00:57:02,835
Yeah, the batsman's all right,
840
00:57:02,961 --> 00:57:06,296
but I always have liked a little bit
of bowler myself, you know.
841
00:57:08,591 --> 00:57:11,051
And raised most tenderly
842
00:57:11,678 --> 00:57:14,596
Till I became a sporting blade
843
00:57:14,931 --> 00:57:17,474
- I thought you'd never get here!
- What the hell?
844
00:57:17,725 --> 00:57:20,727
Darling, I've been waiting
for you to telephone for days.
845
00:57:20,812 --> 00:57:22,146
What are you doing here?
846
00:57:22,188 --> 00:57:25,858
I've been thinking about what you said,
and I think you're right.
847
00:57:26,276 --> 00:57:29,778
I think the only way two people
can really get to know one another
848
00:57:29,863 --> 00:57:31,363
is by living together.
849
00:57:31,698 --> 00:57:34,032
- What?
- So I'm moving in here.
850
00:57:35,034 --> 00:57:36,285
You're moving in here?
851
00:57:38,288 --> 00:57:40,706
You've taken leave of your senses!
You're a weird lady!
852
00:57:40,832 --> 00:57:44,376
You know, even though we've
known each other for such a few hours,
853
00:57:45,211 --> 00:57:48,505
I feel that we were meant for one another.
854
00:57:48,923 --> 00:57:50,340
Do you believe in kismet?
855
00:57:51,009 --> 00:57:52,718
Please. Go home.
856
00:57:53,219 --> 00:57:54,428
I'm hungry.
857
00:57:55,221 --> 00:57:56,763
Don't you just love sin?
858
00:57:59,058 --> 00:58:00,559
Now, just a bloody minute!
859
00:58:00,643 --> 00:58:01,810
Sit down!
860
00:58:02,353 --> 00:58:03,437
- Sit?
- Sit!
861
00:58:03,605 --> 00:58:05,230
Sit. Fine.
862
00:58:05,565 --> 00:58:09,193
Now, you and I are going to have
a little talk and get things straightened out.
863
00:58:09,527 --> 00:58:11,153
God, I love it when you're domineering.
864
00:58:11,738 --> 00:58:12,905
Really?
865
00:58:14,532 --> 00:58:18,243
Now, while I think
that you're a smashing young lady,
866
00:58:18,870 --> 00:58:21,538
I am not in love with you,
do you understand?
867
00:58:22,415 --> 00:58:24,833
I am not in love with you.
868
00:58:27,504 --> 00:58:29,213
She's been upset lately.
869
00:58:30,590 --> 00:58:32,049
I'm so sorry.
870
00:58:32,175 --> 00:58:35,344
Mademoiselle, the boys
of the emergency suicide ward
871
00:58:35,428 --> 00:58:38,347
voted you this gold watch
for unusual devotion.
872
00:58:40,433 --> 00:58:41,600
Thank you.
873
00:59:03,456 --> 00:59:06,458
Michael, remember me?
You loved me in your office.
874
00:59:06,626 --> 00:59:07,960
Indeed I do.
875
00:59:10,088 --> 00:59:12,089
Remember the night in the hospital bed?
876
00:59:12,632 --> 00:59:13,840
Unforgettable.
877
00:59:14,968 --> 00:59:17,719
- My mother's crypt.
- Poor Mummy.
878
00:59:22,100 --> 00:59:25,352
- On top of the Eiffel Tower.
- Very chilly.
879
00:59:32,860 --> 00:59:34,152
You could've had me, Michael.
880
00:59:40,118 --> 00:59:41,410
Michael, I need you.
881
00:59:41,536 --> 00:59:44,204
Please, now, I've
telephoned you several times.
882
00:59:44,289 --> 00:59:45,581
Why haven't you called me?
883
00:59:45,665 --> 00:59:47,916
I've phoned you I don't know
how many times, maybe six.
884
00:59:48,835 --> 00:59:52,212
I know it's neurotic,
but I want you, Michael.
885
00:59:56,676 --> 00:59:58,218
Excuse me, I'm...
886
00:59:58,595 --> 00:59:59,928
Hello.
887
01:00:00,179 --> 01:00:01,430
- Hello.
- Hello.
888
01:00:02,890 --> 01:00:05,892
Michael, I've tried
to telephone you for several...
889
01:00:06,185 --> 01:00:07,978
- I've tried to tele...
- Michael.
890
01:00:08,104 --> 01:00:10,480
- I've telephoned you several...
- Michael!
891
01:00:12,275 --> 01:00:13,358
Right!
892
01:00:13,693 --> 01:00:16,737
I want all you cats to shape up!
893
01:00:28,750 --> 01:00:32,085
But I, that am not shaped of sportive tricks
894
01:00:32,170 --> 01:00:34,254
nor made to court
an amorous looking glass.
895
01:00:34,756 --> 01:00:38,550
I, that am rudely stamp'd
and want love's majesty to strut...
896
01:00:38,926 --> 01:00:43,096
Why, I, in this weak piping time of peace,
897
01:00:43,348 --> 01:00:45,474
have no delight to pass away the time.
898
01:00:45,683 --> 01:00:49,686
Can I do all this
and yet cannot get a crown?
899
01:00:52,649 --> 01:00:55,651
Tut, wild feather. I pluck it down.
900
01:00:56,110 --> 01:00:58,111
Dr. Fassbender. Dr. Fassbender.
901
01:01:00,323 --> 01:01:03,075
It's very important
that I see Dr. Fassbender immediately.
902
01:01:03,201 --> 01:01:05,077
It's not possible.
He's in with a patient now.
903
01:01:05,161 --> 01:01:06,411
I daren't disturb him.
904
01:01:06,621 --> 01:01:09,456
Couldn't you, in your heart,
make an exception in this one instance?
905
01:01:09,540 --> 01:01:11,124
It's very, very important.
906
01:01:12,502 --> 01:01:16,088
Well, in this case,
I think maybe it's possible. He's in there.
907
01:01:20,468 --> 01:01:21,760
Hello! Good morning!
908
01:01:23,680 --> 01:01:26,390
- Michael James!
- Can't you knock?
909
01:01:26,683 --> 01:01:28,266
Knock? But I'm in dire need!
910
01:01:28,351 --> 01:01:30,060
So am I! What do you think I am, human?
911
01:01:30,311 --> 01:01:32,151
Bring it up at the next
group analysis meeting.
912
01:01:32,271 --> 01:01:35,357
Something like that. Not... not now!
913
01:01:37,652 --> 01:01:40,779
Incidentally, I hope you don't get the
wrong idea about what happened in there.
914
01:01:40,822 --> 01:01:42,698
Not at all. It was quite simple.
915
01:01:43,199 --> 01:01:44,408
You attacked me.
916
01:01:45,118 --> 01:01:48,912
Well, if you feel like that about it,
you may as well have your whistle back.
917
01:01:50,998 --> 01:01:52,457
Thank God you came when you did.
918
01:01:52,792 --> 01:01:55,752
I was here for a private lesson,
and next thing you know, bang!
919
01:01:57,088 --> 01:01:59,297
Just because I speak frankly
about my problems
920
01:01:59,340 --> 01:02:01,299
doesn't mean I'm a little pushover, does it?
921
01:02:01,509 --> 01:02:02,592
Oh, no.
922
01:02:02,677 --> 01:02:05,679
There is more to love
than just physical excitement.
923
01:02:06,097 --> 01:02:08,265
Respect, for instance, is very important.
924
01:02:08,307 --> 01:02:09,641
Very important.
925
01:02:09,767 --> 01:02:12,018
Don't think that I
don't appreciate those things.
926
01:02:12,228 --> 01:02:13,478
- Like finesse.
- Finesse.
927
01:02:13,646 --> 01:02:15,230
- Atmosphere.
- Atmosphere.
928
01:02:15,481 --> 01:02:18,358
- You agree atmosphere is very important?
- Very important.
929
01:02:18,443 --> 01:02:22,904
Two people in a romantic setting.
Soft light, music, champagne.
930
01:02:23,489 --> 01:02:25,532
Perhaps even incense burning.
931
01:02:25,867 --> 01:02:27,242
Incense is beautiful!
932
01:02:27,493 --> 01:02:29,828
This is all very important to me.
933
01:02:33,082 --> 01:02:35,333
Only then can I give myself.
934
01:02:36,502 --> 01:02:37,919
But not before.
935
01:03:00,234 --> 01:03:03,236
Who would have ever thought.
In an elevator.
936
01:03:03,571 --> 01:03:05,530
It's the safest place in the world,
937
01:03:05,907 --> 01:03:08,784
provided the combined weight
of the two people
938
01:03:08,993 --> 01:03:11,870
does not exceed 1,400 pounds.
939
01:03:22,173 --> 01:03:23,173
It was hell.
940
01:03:23,549 --> 01:03:25,175
But we'll be fine.
941
01:03:25,635 --> 01:03:27,515
- Thank you so much.
- Thank you. We'll be fine.
942
01:03:27,637 --> 01:03:30,639
Very kind. Thank you.
We'll be absolutely fine.
943
01:03:35,061 --> 01:03:37,521
Come away with me for the weekend.
944
01:03:37,855 --> 01:03:39,898
- Where?
- Chateau Chantelle.
945
01:03:40,525 --> 01:03:41,817
How lovely!
946
01:03:42,109 --> 01:03:46,112
We can fish and hunt
and ride and swim and...
947
01:03:46,197 --> 01:03:48,573
And all in my room.
948
01:04:16,894 --> 01:04:20,146
Michael! Carole wasn't in,
so we thought we would try here.
949
01:04:21,941 --> 01:04:23,108
Mr. and Mrs. Werner.
950
01:04:23,401 --> 01:04:24,921
Didn't Carole tell you we were coming?
951
01:04:25,778 --> 01:04:28,947
Yes, merril mumming. Carole, coming.
952
01:04:29,657 --> 01:04:31,032
Call me Mother!
953
01:04:59,061 --> 01:05:02,772
Miss Lefebvre, I can stand it no longer!
954
01:05:03,316 --> 01:05:06,568
For the love of you, I die!
955
01:06:25,731 --> 01:06:26,856
You have any salt?
956
01:06:27,149 --> 01:06:28,525
What was that you said?
957
01:06:29,735 --> 01:06:32,529
- Do you have any salt?
- Have I got any salt?
958
01:06:33,072 --> 01:06:35,740
I got a boat, I got kerosene,
959
01:06:35,825 --> 01:06:39,619
matches, firecrackers,
two swords, und this flag.
960
01:06:40,079 --> 01:06:41,913
But I ain't got no salt.
961
01:06:43,582 --> 01:06:44,791
You always eat here?
962
01:06:45,710 --> 01:06:47,377
Once a year. On my birthday.
963
01:06:47,837 --> 01:06:50,463
- Your birthday's tonight, huh?
- Yeah, I'm 29 today.
964
01:06:50,715 --> 01:06:51,881
29?
965
01:06:53,217 --> 01:06:54,634
What a night I should pick.
966
01:06:55,761 --> 01:06:56,928
Look...
967
01:06:57,346 --> 01:07:00,849
I've got something that I wish to do
in private without people looking at me.
968
01:07:00,933 --> 01:07:02,100
Would you mind?
969
01:07:02,143 --> 01:07:04,728
Go ahead.
I'm just gonna sit here, grab a bite and run.
970
01:07:05,563 --> 01:07:06,896
Look, I can't go ahead
971
01:07:06,939 --> 01:07:10,275
while you're hanging around here
eating that food, you naughty thing.
972
01:07:10,359 --> 01:07:12,004
That's all right. Do whatever you have to.
973
01:07:12,028 --> 01:07:14,029
You're a selfish gourmet.
974
01:07:25,833 --> 01:07:27,167
What are you doing over there?
975
01:07:29,045 --> 01:07:30,253
What is that?
976
01:07:31,005 --> 01:07:32,338
What's that, a flare?
977
01:07:33,632 --> 01:07:34,841
What are you doing here?
978
01:07:35,801 --> 01:07:38,762
What's going on? What's going on here?
979
01:07:39,722 --> 01:07:42,015
Why don't you shut up, you cretin?
980
01:07:43,059 --> 01:07:44,851
I'm trying to commit suicide!
981
01:07:45,478 --> 01:07:48,772
Set fire to my beautiful psychoanalyst body
982
01:07:49,148 --> 01:07:52,275
and sail out to sea ablaze like a Viking!
983
01:07:53,360 --> 01:07:55,779
- You're a doctor?
- I'm a doctor of the mind.
984
01:07:56,155 --> 01:07:57,363
- Really?
- Yes.
985
01:07:57,448 --> 01:07:59,491
I have terrible emotional problems.
986
01:07:59,658 --> 01:08:00,825
Could you help me?
987
01:08:01,202 --> 01:08:03,328
You certainly picked
a very odd time to ask me.
988
01:08:03,621 --> 01:08:05,121
I'm just in the middle of a suicide.
989
01:08:05,414 --> 01:08:08,833
All right, but you'll have to lay down
'cause I can't do it standing up.
990
01:08:08,876 --> 01:08:10,979
What do you mean, "lay down"?
This is a rented tuxedo.
991
01:08:11,003 --> 01:08:14,172
I don't care what it is. Lay down!
I can't do it standing up.
992
01:08:14,256 --> 01:08:15,507
- Get in there.
- Where?
993
01:08:15,716 --> 01:08:17,175
Lay right flat out in the boat.
994
01:08:21,055 --> 01:08:22,222
There's Carole.
995
01:08:23,140 --> 01:08:24,474
Hello.
996
01:08:25,017 --> 01:08:27,102
It's Mr. Overactive Gland.
997
01:08:27,186 --> 01:08:28,686
- Listen...
- Take your hands off me.
998
01:08:29,063 --> 01:08:32,899
I've got my own life to lead, and I told you
I never wanted to see you again.
999
01:08:33,317 --> 01:08:36,528
Stay in your own apartment and lead
your own life and let me like mine!
1000
01:08:36,612 --> 01:08:37,779
Quiet!
1001
01:08:38,697 --> 01:08:41,658
Darling, guess who's here?
Your mother and father.
1002
01:08:42,952 --> 01:08:44,119
Mother!
1003
01:08:44,370 --> 01:08:45,703
Mother! Dad!
1004
01:08:46,247 --> 01:08:47,372
When did you get here?
1005
01:08:47,665 --> 01:08:49,582
The roads were clear.
We got in a little early.
1006
01:08:49,667 --> 01:08:50,959
Michael has been entertaining.
1007
01:08:51,794 --> 01:08:53,837
Yes, yes. He's a marvelous host.
1008
01:08:54,380 --> 01:08:55,713
Let's not go into that now.
1009
01:08:56,590 --> 01:09:00,260
Let's go out. The night's young.
Your parents have to leave in the morning.
1010
01:09:00,344 --> 01:09:04,013
Yes, let's celebrate!
I adore this city. It's magnificent.
1011
01:09:14,024 --> 01:09:17,235
I don't remember when you two said
you were going to get married.
1012
01:09:17,570 --> 01:09:19,070
We didn't give you a date, Mama.
1013
01:09:19,989 --> 01:09:22,907
I could've sworn you wrote
it will be next month.
1014
01:09:23,701 --> 01:09:25,243
Didn't she write that, Paul?
1015
01:09:25,411 --> 01:09:26,911
I didn't remember any date.
1016
01:09:40,426 --> 01:09:43,761
We... we really are taking steps
1017
01:09:43,971 --> 01:09:48,016
to facilitate proceedings
in a mature and deliberate way.
1018
01:09:48,392 --> 01:09:49,726
Did you get the blood tests?
1019
01:09:49,935 --> 01:09:52,270
Mother, when we're ready,
we'll let you know.
1020
01:10:04,783 --> 01:10:05,909
I'm in love with a girl.
1021
01:10:06,202 --> 01:10:08,578
She doesn't love me.
She loves some other guy.
1022
01:10:08,829 --> 01:10:09,996
I'm just in the way.
1023
01:10:10,706 --> 01:10:13,082
Oh, I see. Yes. Yes, yes.
1024
01:10:13,334 --> 01:10:14,574
What do you think I oughtta do?
1025
01:10:16,587 --> 01:10:18,421
Well, why don't you buy a sports car?
1026
01:10:19,632 --> 01:10:20,632
A sports car?
1027
01:10:20,716 --> 01:10:22,926
Yeah, you know, a nice
little two-seater sports car.
1028
01:10:22,968 --> 01:10:25,386
French, German, Italian thing
goes "vroom"! Like that.
1029
01:10:25,471 --> 01:10:28,181
They love it. A sign of man's virility.
1030
01:10:28,807 --> 01:10:30,391
Perhaps you ought to get two, maybe.
1031
01:10:31,477 --> 01:10:32,685
No. I can't drive.
1032
01:10:33,187 --> 01:10:35,480
Well. You knock a few people down.
1033
01:10:35,522 --> 01:10:37,882
The main thing is you get the girl.
That's all that matters.
1034
01:10:38,525 --> 01:10:41,486
You know, for a doctor,
you sound terribly unethical.
1035
01:10:41,904 --> 01:10:42,946
Unethical?
1036
01:10:44,198 --> 01:10:46,199
Why do I give a damn about ethics?
1037
01:10:47,534 --> 01:10:50,745
My father,
the most beloved gynecologist in Vienna...
1038
01:10:51,455 --> 01:10:53,790
Before they took him away
on a morals charge
1039
01:10:53,832 --> 01:10:56,251
for indecent exposure
at the state opera house
1040
01:10:56,335 --> 01:10:57,710
said, and I quote,
1041
01:10:58,254 --> 01:11:02,298
"Please, do not take me away.
I will not do it again."
1042
01:11:02,841 --> 01:11:03,841
Brilliant quote.
1043
01:11:03,926 --> 01:11:05,468
He was a brilliant pervert.
1044
01:11:05,886 --> 01:11:07,512
Listen, it's my birthday.
1045
01:11:07,888 --> 01:11:09,681
- You told me that.
- Can we get back to it?
1046
01:11:10,140 --> 01:11:11,349
What about my funeral?
1047
01:11:11,684 --> 01:11:14,227
All right. Let's do your funeral first,
then my birthday.
1048
01:11:14,687 --> 01:11:16,938
All right, it's a bargain.
Are you any good at wrapping?
1049
01:11:17,231 --> 01:11:19,941
Yeah. I used to work
at a department store. Why?
1050
01:11:20,025 --> 01:11:23,027
Maybe you could help me get
wrapped up in that flag there.
1051
01:11:27,533 --> 01:11:28,658
Grab one end.
1052
01:11:28,951 --> 01:11:29,993
You know how to do this?
1053
01:11:30,244 --> 01:11:32,120
It's a cinch. I used to wrap packages.
1054
01:11:33,372 --> 01:11:35,164
All right. Wait a minute. Wait a second.
1055
01:11:35,499 --> 01:11:36,666
Got it?
1056
01:11:36,709 --> 01:11:38,543
Try and get it now. Go ahead. All right.
1057
01:11:38,794 --> 01:11:39,961
- Now.
- Now!
1058
01:11:40,254 --> 01:11:41,587
No, no, no.
1059
01:11:42,047 --> 01:11:43,131
Again.
1060
01:11:46,552 --> 01:11:48,636
I don't want to be a Viking.
1061
01:11:49,596 --> 01:11:50,956
Why don't we get something to eat?
1062
01:11:51,724 --> 01:11:52,807
Good idea.
1063
01:11:52,933 --> 01:11:54,373
Are you upset 'cause you're a sissy?
1064
01:11:54,435 --> 01:11:56,728
You can get that haircut, go to a gym.
You'll be great.
1065
01:11:56,895 --> 01:11:58,438
Nothing to do with a haircut!
1066
01:12:02,651 --> 01:12:04,319
We've had a wonderful time!
1067
01:12:04,403 --> 01:12:06,654
We will go back to our hotel now
and get some sleep.
1068
01:12:06,864 --> 01:12:08,573
- Thank you, darling.
- Good-bye, Daddy.
1069
01:12:08,741 --> 01:12:10,158
Thank you for everything!
1070
01:12:10,576 --> 01:12:11,909
- Bye, Mama.
- Bye.
1071
01:12:12,453 --> 01:12:14,495
- Come on, Mother.
- Thank you again.
1072
01:12:15,039 --> 01:12:17,665
We're leaving noon tomorrow.
In fact, that's today!
1073
01:12:17,750 --> 01:12:20,251
And please, remember
you will get married!
1074
01:12:20,336 --> 01:12:22,003
Yes. Good-bye, Mother.
1075
01:12:22,087 --> 01:12:26,257
We are going away for the weekend.
That will be our second honeymoon.
1076
01:12:26,592 --> 01:12:27,633
Drive carefully.
1077
01:12:29,428 --> 01:12:30,470
Bye!
1078
01:12:30,888 --> 01:12:32,347
- Bye, now.
- Bye!
1079
01:12:33,807 --> 01:12:35,224
Good-bye!
1080
01:12:38,771 --> 01:12:39,937
Bye.
1081
01:13:05,964 --> 01:13:07,590
- Tonight was fun.
- Yes.
1082
01:13:10,135 --> 01:13:13,262
I haven't felt so relaxed for a long time.
1083
01:13:17,351 --> 01:13:19,977
- You were marvelous with my parents.
- I like them.
1084
01:13:22,356 --> 01:13:24,607
- They adore you.
- Really?
1085
01:13:32,574 --> 01:13:33,741
Well...
1086
01:13:41,500 --> 01:13:42,834
It was nice seeing you again.
1087
01:13:43,293 --> 01:13:45,128
- Carole.
- Yes?
1088
01:13:49,007 --> 01:13:50,174
Let's get married.
1089
01:13:53,178 --> 01:13:54,512
You're drunk.
1090
01:13:54,805 --> 01:13:56,347
No. I'm sober.
1091
01:13:56,849 --> 01:13:59,725
I mean it. Let's get married.
1092
01:14:01,270 --> 01:14:03,438
- Just like that?
- Just like that.
1093
01:14:05,816 --> 01:14:09,652
I can't tell you anything,
but suddenly I'm sure.
1094
01:14:11,530 --> 01:14:14,240
- Suddenly you're sure?
- Suddenly I'm very sure.
1095
01:14:16,201 --> 01:14:18,161
Will you marry me?
1096
01:14:20,539 --> 01:14:21,622
Like when?
1097
01:14:21,915 --> 01:14:23,040
This week.
1098
01:14:23,542 --> 01:14:25,460
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday...
1099
01:14:26,712 --> 01:14:28,212
You want me to pick a date?
1100
01:14:32,759 --> 01:14:33,885
I adore you.
1101
01:14:36,054 --> 01:14:37,263
I'm positive.
1102
01:14:37,681 --> 01:14:38,723
Certain.
1103
01:14:43,228 --> 01:14:47,315
I want you
more than anything in the world,
1104
01:14:48,817 --> 01:14:50,067
pussycat.
1105
01:14:55,365 --> 01:14:57,408
How... how about Monday?
1106
01:14:58,619 --> 01:14:59,785
Monday?
1107
01:15:00,245 --> 01:15:01,621
Absolutely!
1108
01:15:02,664 --> 01:15:04,415
What a fool I've been.
1109
01:15:05,542 --> 01:15:09,045
I've searched and searched,
and sampled every girl I could find.
1110
01:15:09,087 --> 01:15:11,589
And now I realize that human fulfillment
1111
01:15:11,673 --> 01:15:15,468
does not come from short,
physical, random adventures,
1112
01:15:15,552 --> 01:15:20,348
but from a deep relationship which is,
quite often, under one's very nose.
1113
01:15:21,183 --> 01:15:23,518
I love you. Love you! Love you! Love you!
1114
01:15:24,770 --> 01:15:25,811
Pussycat.
1115
01:15:26,230 --> 01:15:27,688
Let's make it early Monday!
1116
01:15:32,152 --> 01:15:33,611
I've wasted so much time!
1117
01:15:33,695 --> 01:15:35,821
I can't believe that I finally caught you!
1118
01:15:35,906 --> 01:15:38,324
You have my word, as an inveterate cheat.
1119
01:15:40,661 --> 01:15:42,954
I'm the happiest woman in the world.
1120
01:15:43,413 --> 01:15:44,497
Second happiest.
1121
01:15:45,624 --> 01:15:46,791
Your mother.
1122
01:16:06,979 --> 01:16:08,145
Renée?
1123
01:16:08,981 --> 01:16:10,189
Hello, pussycat.
1124
01:16:12,025 --> 01:16:13,693
I can't make it.
1125
01:16:15,988 --> 01:16:18,739
I have an assignment somewhere else,
do you see?
1126
01:16:18,824 --> 01:16:20,449
And it's an emergency.
1127
01:16:24,329 --> 01:16:25,663
Good-bye, pussycat.
1128
01:16:28,083 --> 01:16:29,875
Gradual disengagement.
1129
01:16:31,670 --> 01:16:33,838
Pussycat, I'm off.
1130
01:16:34,965 --> 01:16:36,215
See you tomorrow.
1131
01:16:36,842 --> 01:16:37,883
Have fun.
1132
01:16:38,385 --> 01:16:40,219
You sure you're not meeting some dolly?
1133
01:16:40,721 --> 01:16:44,348
Trust, my darling. Trust.
That's the basis of any marriage.
1134
01:16:44,641 --> 01:16:45,933
- Do you want to come?
- No.
1135
01:16:46,059 --> 01:16:48,853
I have too much to do
in view of recent developments.
1136
01:16:49,313 --> 01:16:50,396
I'll be back tomorrow.
1137
01:16:50,480 --> 01:16:52,690
If I'm not back tomorrow,
send for the police.
1138
01:16:53,191 --> 01:16:55,526
If they're not back tomorrow,
send my clothes.
1139
01:16:57,487 --> 01:16:58,654
I love you.
1140
01:16:59,364 --> 01:17:00,615
Bonjour.
1141
01:17:06,371 --> 01:17:08,748
Philippe? It's Renée.
1142
01:17:10,042 --> 01:17:13,461
Listen, what about that weekend
we talked about?
1143
01:17:14,296 --> 01:17:15,796
Yes, I'm suddenly free.
1144
01:17:16,048 --> 01:17:18,924
And I have a reservation for two
at Chateau Chantelle.
1145
01:17:19,926 --> 01:17:24,055
Hello? I wish to speak
with Miss Lefebvre, please.
1146
01:17:26,391 --> 01:17:28,434
- Mademoiselle Lefebvre?
- Yes?
1147
01:17:28,727 --> 01:17:32,396
Mademoiselle Lefebvre, there is a
Dr. Fassbender on the telephone for you.
1148
01:17:32,939 --> 01:17:34,482
Tell him I've gone to South America.
1149
01:17:34,650 --> 01:17:36,776
But I'm going to Chateau Chantelle
for the weekend.
1150
01:17:39,738 --> 01:17:41,906
Yes. Yes, I understand.
Of course. Of course.
1151
01:17:41,990 --> 01:17:43,908
Yes. Thank you. Thank you. Good-bye.
1152
01:17:48,455 --> 01:17:49,538
Anna!
1153
01:17:52,084 --> 01:17:56,337
Anna, I have to go to Chateau Chantelle
for the weekend.
1154
01:17:56,546 --> 01:17:59,131
There's an... an analyst convention.
1155
01:17:59,424 --> 01:18:02,426
But the convention
was last week, Fritz, at Arles.
1156
01:18:02,469 --> 01:18:05,763
No, that was the Freudian convention.
This is the Jungian one.
1157
01:18:05,931 --> 01:18:09,892
Anyway, didn't you tell me you had a
woman's auxiliary singsong or something?
1158
01:18:09,935 --> 01:18:12,770
But I wanted you to listen to my lines
and have you cue me.
1159
01:18:13,021 --> 01:18:15,648
Cue yourself. What do you think I am,
an automatic cueing machine?
1160
01:18:16,108 --> 01:18:19,610
Daddy's a degenerate!
Daddy's a degenerate!
1161
01:18:19,945 --> 01:18:23,072
Get away from me!
I hate you! I hate all of you!
1162
01:18:23,240 --> 01:18:26,742
I'll kill you the next time you come
near me saying things like that!
1163
01:18:26,785 --> 01:18:27,952
Where are you going?
1164
01:18:28,036 --> 01:18:30,116
I'm going away for the weekend.
Don't forget to wash!
1165
01:18:46,638 --> 01:18:47,930
Bye!
1166
01:18:52,185 --> 01:18:54,562
Hello, Victor.
You're late. Rehearsal is over.
1167
01:18:55,480 --> 01:18:57,815
How would you like
to love a very attractive short man?
1168
01:18:58,775 --> 01:19:00,943
Certainly not. Bye.
1169
01:19:01,945 --> 01:19:05,906
That's too bad because...
I have a sports car now.
1170
01:19:06,408 --> 01:19:09,368
- You have what?
- A red sports car.
1171
01:19:09,995 --> 01:19:11,078
That's great!
1172
01:19:11,288 --> 01:19:13,748
- Wanna go for a drive?
- I would love to! Come on, hurry!
1173
01:19:14,666 --> 01:19:15,833
Where we gonna go?
1174
01:19:15,917 --> 01:19:18,794
I know a nice little place
called Chateau Chantelle. Come on!
1175
01:19:27,721 --> 01:19:28,971
- Yes?
- Michael!
1176
01:19:31,683 --> 01:19:33,017
Can I help you?
1177
01:19:33,351 --> 01:19:34,769
Are you the maid?
1178
01:19:37,063 --> 01:19:38,230
In a way.
1179
01:19:38,815 --> 01:19:40,149
Is Michael in?
1180
01:19:41,860 --> 01:19:45,696
No. He is at Chateau Chantelle
for the weekend.
1181
01:19:46,823 --> 01:19:48,741
Chateau Chantelle?
1182
01:19:49,534 --> 01:19:50,701
May I ask...
1183
01:19:51,578 --> 01:19:52,787
Well, who are you?
1184
01:19:54,706 --> 01:19:56,248
I'm his fiancée.
1185
01:19:56,625 --> 01:19:57,625
His what?
1186
01:19:57,918 --> 01:19:59,835
I'm his fiancée.
1187
01:20:03,048 --> 01:20:07,468
We're going away next week.
We're going to be married.
1188
01:20:33,078 --> 01:20:36,247
Good afternoon.
1189
01:20:41,253 --> 01:20:43,212
Might I ask where you came from?
1190
01:20:43,797 --> 01:20:45,756
I fell from the sky!
1191
01:20:46,633 --> 01:20:49,593
I'm a parachutist, and I missed my mark.
1192
01:20:51,179 --> 01:20:52,346
Where are you going?
1193
01:20:53,640 --> 01:20:54,974
Chateau Chantelle.
1194
01:20:55,141 --> 01:20:56,767
May I use your telephone?
1195
01:20:57,727 --> 01:20:58,978
By all means.
1196
01:21:29,050 --> 01:21:31,468
Well, usually I'm fantastic
at hitting my target.
1197
01:21:33,471 --> 01:21:35,306
My name is Michael James.
1198
01:21:35,390 --> 01:21:37,766
- Yes.
- And I'm from Chic. Thank you.
1199
01:21:37,851 --> 01:21:39,226
Room La Dubarry.
1200
01:21:39,603 --> 01:21:42,354
Upstairs and all the way down.
The far end of the hall.
1201
01:21:42,856 --> 01:21:45,482
I'd like this washed and pressed.
1202
01:21:45,984 --> 01:21:49,987
No starch.
1203
01:21:54,743 --> 01:21:56,702
Fell out the sky, mate.
1204
01:21:58,747 --> 01:22:02,374
Parachuting's a funny recreation for a girl.
Now, if you were a fella...
1205
01:22:08,173 --> 01:22:11,675
I'd understand pottery
or flower arrangement
1206
01:22:11,718 --> 01:22:14,511
or needlework or knitting.
1207
01:22:15,055 --> 01:22:18,098
It helps sublimate my sexual tensions.
1208
01:22:18,975 --> 01:22:22,353
It's either that or promiscuity.
1209
01:22:23,688 --> 01:22:25,397
I'll tell you what. Make your phone call.
1210
01:22:25,732 --> 01:22:29,568
I'm sure the club is very anxious to know
the whereabouts of their little lost sheep.
1211
01:22:30,320 --> 01:22:31,779
Geronimo.
1212
01:22:33,365 --> 01:22:34,531
It's not fair.
1213
01:22:36,076 --> 01:22:39,328
Can't I tell you about
my experience in free-falling?
1214
01:22:39,829 --> 01:22:42,122
No, you can't, because I am here on a job.
1215
01:22:42,374 --> 01:22:45,334
And, also, I am going to marry
the girl I love.
1216
01:22:45,377 --> 01:22:49,713
So put that away, powder your nose,
and make the phone call.
1217
01:22:49,798 --> 01:22:53,008
And I shall go for a brisk six-mile trot.
1218
01:22:58,974 --> 01:23:03,894
Please send up some champagne
and five dozen oysters.
1219
01:23:04,938 --> 01:23:08,774
Philippe, did you get the feeling
that we were followed on the road?
1220
01:23:08,858 --> 01:23:11,318
- So what?
- We'll take two separate rooms.
1221
01:23:14,489 --> 01:23:17,074
I'll meet you in yours. Prepare.
1222
01:23:36,761 --> 01:23:37,761
Michael!
1223
01:23:37,971 --> 01:23:39,096
Hello.
1224
01:23:39,806 --> 01:23:41,223
What are you doing here?
1225
01:23:41,266 --> 01:23:43,267
Me? Doing here... me...
1226
01:23:44,269 --> 01:23:45,519
Looking for you.
1227
01:23:47,022 --> 01:23:48,480
But I thought you couldn't make it.
1228
01:23:49,274 --> 01:23:52,067
I couldn't make it,
and then I could make it.
1229
01:23:52,736 --> 01:23:56,238
And I telephoned your house
and you weren't there.
1230
01:23:57,282 --> 01:23:58,323
Were you?
1231
01:23:58,783 --> 01:24:01,785
No. I decided to come alone.
1232
01:24:02,120 --> 01:24:03,662
That's exactly what I thought.
1233
01:24:04,039 --> 01:24:07,791
And now we can be together
like we planned.
1234
01:24:08,960 --> 01:24:10,210
Yes, we can.
1235
01:24:10,587 --> 01:24:11,962
We can be together.
1236
01:24:12,297 --> 01:24:14,381
Why don't I go up to my room, freshen up,
1237
01:24:14,632 --> 01:24:16,467
and we can meet here again for a drink?
1238
01:24:16,551 --> 01:24:18,635
Right! And I'll freshen up,
1239
01:24:18,762 --> 01:24:22,556
and we can meet here in the bar
all fresh and washed and rinsed.
1240
01:24:23,767 --> 01:24:24,808
In ten minutes?
1241
01:24:25,310 --> 01:24:26,393
Roger and out.
1242
01:24:29,272 --> 01:24:30,773
Oh, my God.
1243
01:24:58,510 --> 01:25:00,302
- How many gallons?
- Twelve gallons.
1244
01:25:02,514 --> 01:25:04,473
Do you know what's going on
at Chateau Chantelle?
1245
01:25:05,225 --> 01:25:06,266
Orgy.
1246
01:25:06,351 --> 01:25:07,351
Orgy?
1247
01:25:11,272 --> 01:25:14,691
My readers will be fascinated
to learn about this place.
1248
01:25:15,026 --> 01:25:18,612
Now, all the rooms are
named after famous novelists.
1249
01:25:19,072 --> 01:25:21,698
Is there any goings-on going on?
1250
01:25:21,866 --> 01:25:23,325
I wouldn't mention any names,
1251
01:25:23,451 --> 01:25:26,411
but could you tell me
about your typical clientele?
1252
01:25:26,621 --> 01:25:28,330
- My typical clientele?
- Typical.
1253
01:25:28,581 --> 01:25:32,084
But all the people that are here now
are typical clientele.
1254
01:25:33,878 --> 01:25:38,590
There is a man cheating on his wife
in room Lola Montes.
1255
01:25:41,136 --> 01:25:45,430
There is a woman cheating
on her two husbands in Carlotta.
1256
01:25:48,726 --> 01:25:53,272
Two lovers of indeterminate sex
in Reine Margot.
1257
01:25:55,692 --> 01:25:58,193
And two men cheating in Don Juan.
1258
01:25:59,070 --> 01:26:02,823
Yes, well, one might say
that the joint was jumping.
1259
01:26:03,992 --> 01:26:05,450
Yes, sir. Hello?
1260
01:26:05,785 --> 01:26:09,329
We make more money in the off season
than any other time.
1261
01:26:10,206 --> 01:26:13,333
And now you, Monsieur,
with a woman parachutist.
1262
01:26:13,751 --> 01:26:15,210
For us it's the first time.
1263
01:26:15,295 --> 01:26:17,796
Yes, but you see, I'm as innocent
as a newborn baby.
1264
01:26:18,131 --> 01:26:21,592
Etienne, the gentleman in Marquis de Sade
1265
01:26:21,926 --> 01:26:27,181
asks for 12 loaves of bread
and one Boy Scout uniform.
1266
01:26:35,356 --> 01:26:38,275
I want to speak with my wife. My wife.
1267
01:26:48,995 --> 01:26:50,412
I want...
1268
01:27:24,656 --> 01:27:25,781
Philippe?
1269
01:27:26,324 --> 01:27:27,407
Michael!
1270
01:27:27,492 --> 01:27:30,994
It's you! I beg your body. Forgive me!
1271
01:27:31,162 --> 01:27:33,413
Listen, my husband has followed me here.
1272
01:27:33,623 --> 01:27:35,223
If he catches me, he'll cut your throat.
1273
01:27:35,333 --> 01:27:38,877
- My flipt... my bipt... Your what?
- My husband.
1274
01:27:39,045 --> 01:27:41,690
I didn't bring it up in the group
because I thought it would complicate...
1275
01:27:41,714 --> 01:27:43,131
Listen, you must help me.
1276
01:27:43,174 --> 01:27:45,926
My future in-laws are here,
and they think that I'm alone.
1277
01:27:46,177 --> 01:27:49,846
And this lady fell from the sky,
and she's gorgeous. And you're gorgeous.
1278
01:27:50,265 --> 01:27:53,600
But, anyhow, they'll tell Carole because
her mother's a killer. She's a shark.
1279
01:27:53,893 --> 01:27:56,395
We're getting married next week,
and she's nibbling my ear.
1280
01:27:56,479 --> 01:27:58,939
I'm in terrible trouble. Oh, my God.
1281
01:28:03,069 --> 01:28:05,529
It's a shame.
But you have to leave immediately!
1282
01:28:05,655 --> 01:28:07,656
It's all right.
I'm due back at the assignment.
1283
01:28:09,701 --> 01:28:11,034
- He's coming!
- Who's coming?
1284
01:28:11,244 --> 01:28:13,036
My husband! Quick, in the hamper.
1285
01:28:13,162 --> 01:28:14,454
- The what-per?
- The hamper.
1286
01:29:00,335 --> 01:29:02,419
- Are you all right?
- Yes, of course.
1287
01:29:02,587 --> 01:29:04,587
Michael, I'm sorry
about the way things turned out.
1288
01:29:04,756 --> 01:29:07,007
1955. Very good year for brain concussions.
1289
01:29:07,133 --> 01:29:10,761
I shall be cheerfully refunded,
if you'll excuse my bellicose pomposity.
1290
01:29:10,928 --> 01:29:13,597
I shall be egregiously subjected to...
1291
01:29:25,276 --> 01:29:27,116
I'm glad you came back.
I think he's coming to.
1292
01:29:27,278 --> 01:29:28,714
Would you mind helping me
with my zipper, please.
1293
01:29:28,738 --> 01:29:30,280
My zipper.
1294
01:29:30,490 --> 01:29:32,240
Surely. Now, listen to me.
1295
01:29:32,283 --> 01:29:34,576
I do not wish
to be involved in your marriages.
1296
01:29:34,619 --> 01:29:36,870
Now, if you're afraid...
Look at the state of him...
1297
01:29:36,954 --> 01:29:38,121
Call the police.
1298
01:29:38,289 --> 01:29:40,415
They have a very firm policy
towards murderers.
1299
01:29:40,833 --> 01:29:44,961
Now thank you, good night,
and all good things come to an end.
1300
01:29:46,172 --> 01:29:47,506
What is going on?
1301
01:29:57,475 --> 01:29:58,517
Michael, please, come...
1302
01:30:01,479 --> 01:30:05,023
Herr Professor.
Now, what are you doing here?
1303
01:30:16,285 --> 01:30:17,452
Guess what I've got on?
1304
01:30:19,122 --> 01:30:20,163
My hat.
1305
01:30:20,665 --> 01:30:21,873
You're right.
1306
01:30:23,751 --> 01:30:24,918
And what else?
1307
01:30:25,586 --> 01:30:26,753
I don't know.
1308
01:30:30,007 --> 01:30:31,174
Nothing.
1309
01:30:32,093 --> 01:30:33,260
That's nice.
1310
01:30:36,013 --> 01:30:37,681
Pussycat from the sky.
1311
01:30:40,893 --> 01:30:42,602
I can't resist you.
1312
01:30:43,938 --> 01:30:45,439
Don't resist me.
1313
01:30:47,108 --> 01:30:48,400
Capitulate.
1314
01:30:51,571 --> 01:30:53,363
- Please, let me in.
- No.
1315
01:30:54,365 --> 01:30:55,685
Please, let me in, Miss Lefebvre.
1316
01:30:55,908 --> 01:30:57,159
No.
1317
01:30:57,201 --> 01:30:59,411
Let me in, let me in, or I'll scream!
1318
01:30:59,704 --> 01:31:00,871
I won't.
1319
01:31:00,955 --> 01:31:02,683
What's so terrible?
What do you think I'll do to you?
1320
01:31:02,707 --> 01:31:05,792
You have a strange look in your eyes,
and I'm late for an appointment.
1321
01:31:05,877 --> 01:31:08,462
Listen, I only want to talk with you.
What's so awful in that?
1322
01:31:09,088 --> 01:31:10,672
Later. I've got to go some place.
1323
01:31:10,715 --> 01:31:13,049
No! Now! I'm fed up with being put off!
1324
01:31:17,847 --> 01:31:20,891
I only want five minutes of your time!
1325
01:31:21,058 --> 01:31:23,727
- Think of your reputation!
- One drink is all I ask!
1326
01:31:24,061 --> 01:31:27,397
Otherwise I shall hold my breath
until all the life goes out of my body.
1327
01:31:28,357 --> 01:31:29,816
Doctor. Doctor?
1328
01:31:30,902 --> 01:31:32,068
All right then.
1329
01:31:32,945 --> 01:31:35,238
A quick, fast drink, and I must really go.
1330
01:31:37,325 --> 01:31:39,242
Try to think of me as a kindly old man
1331
01:31:39,577 --> 01:31:42,412
who has only your best interests at heart.
1332
01:31:43,998 --> 01:31:45,165
All right.
1333
01:31:46,542 --> 01:31:48,293
Your oysters and champagne, madame.
1334
01:31:49,545 --> 01:31:50,795
Oysters and champagne?
1335
01:31:51,422 --> 01:31:53,089
I thought you looked a little tired.
1336
01:31:53,299 --> 01:31:55,425
A little tired? I'm out of my mind.
1337
01:31:56,093 --> 01:31:57,344
What am I doing here?
1338
01:31:58,054 --> 01:32:00,639
I'm spoken for! I'm promised forth.
1339
01:32:01,265 --> 01:32:04,643
Don't open that bottle!
And close up those oysters! And get out.
1340
01:32:08,189 --> 01:32:09,606
Come back to bed immediately.
1341
01:32:09,774 --> 01:32:10,941
Look here, young woman,
1342
01:32:11,150 --> 01:32:14,402
I've had a lot of experience fondling...
handling young girls like you,
1343
01:32:14,445 --> 01:32:16,071
and it's all got to stop!
1344
01:32:18,074 --> 01:32:19,434
I'm going to try not to come back.
1345
01:32:24,038 --> 01:32:27,749
Michael James, you were gravely tempted
and you came through it unspotted.
1346
01:32:31,879 --> 01:32:33,296
I've been in there twice.
1347
01:32:46,811 --> 01:32:48,311
Michael! There you are!
1348
01:32:48,813 --> 01:32:50,981
I followed you up here and checked in.
1349
01:32:51,190 --> 01:32:52,691
How did you know I was here?
1350
01:32:53,025 --> 01:32:54,276
Please, don't hate me.
1351
01:32:54,652 --> 01:32:58,029
No! I don't hate you.
And don't swallow anything!
1352
01:32:58,239 --> 01:33:00,991
Don't hate me. I'm so upset.
You don't know how I feel...
1353
01:33:01,075 --> 01:33:04,369
Listen to me a minute.
Now, I must pull myself together.
1354
01:33:04,579 --> 01:33:06,496
I'm fine. I'm rational.
1355
01:33:06,622 --> 01:33:07,808
I want to do something terrible.
1356
01:33:07,832 --> 01:33:08,999
I'm in a tight situation.
1357
01:33:10,334 --> 01:33:12,627
I'll behave in a mature
and responsible way.
1358
01:33:12,670 --> 01:33:14,022
- I shall...
- I wanna kill myself!
1359
01:33:14,046 --> 01:33:15,422
First of all, I shall gag you!
1360
01:33:16,048 --> 01:33:18,174
And then I shall bind you.
1361
01:33:23,347 --> 01:33:24,472
You're hurting me.
1362
01:33:24,515 --> 01:33:27,058
My wife,
that creature that ate Europe is here.
1363
01:33:27,310 --> 01:33:29,019
Never mind. You're breaking my wrist!
1364
01:33:29,061 --> 01:33:31,187
- I'm a doctor. I'll fix it.
- Let me go.
1365
01:33:41,198 --> 01:33:43,450
Fritz! Where are you?
1366
01:34:10,394 --> 01:34:12,998
I beg your sweet pardon, I'm being
chased by a maniac. Could you help me?
1367
01:34:13,022 --> 01:34:14,742
- Quick. Get in the closet.
- In the closet.
1368
01:34:16,275 --> 01:34:17,400
In the closet...
1369
01:34:17,943 --> 01:34:19,110
Thank you very much.
1370
01:34:25,743 --> 01:34:29,245
Victor, I can't let you make love to me
with a person in the closet.
1371
01:34:29,455 --> 01:34:31,331
Why? How many people
in the closet do you need?
1372
01:34:35,961 --> 01:34:37,921
Help me. Please, help me!
1373
01:34:43,344 --> 01:34:45,906
- My wife is coming. I've got to hide.
- Quick, get in the closet.
1374
01:34:45,930 --> 01:34:46,971
Yes.
1375
01:34:58,901 --> 01:35:00,402
Thank you. I'll recommend that.
1376
01:35:04,782 --> 01:35:06,866
A little misunderstanding. Nothing more.
1377
01:35:11,288 --> 01:35:13,498
Hey, that's some closet you've got there.
1378
01:35:23,676 --> 01:35:24,968
Fritz!
1379
01:35:41,444 --> 01:35:44,446
Please, where is he now?
I've just been tied up.
1380
01:35:44,488 --> 01:35:46,408
I know it. There is a maniac loose.
Come with me.
1381
01:35:52,788 --> 01:35:53,955
Let us in!
1382
01:36:13,851 --> 01:36:15,185
Hello, the police?
1383
01:36:19,565 --> 01:36:20,648
I need help.
1384
01:36:26,197 --> 01:36:27,530
The orgy's in here!
1385
01:36:27,907 --> 01:36:30,325
We are the first ones.
What a lovely way to start!
1386
01:36:30,409 --> 01:36:31,868
Hi, fellas! Wait for me!
1387
01:36:32,077 --> 01:36:35,038
You are horrible people!
Get away from me!
1388
01:36:36,540 --> 01:36:39,334
Wait! Wait! You! Stop!
1389
01:36:39,794 --> 01:36:42,003
- Who is that woman?
- Is she dead?
1390
01:36:42,546 --> 01:36:43,755
Dead? Sure, she's dead.
1391
01:36:44,215 --> 01:36:45,882
But she did not die in vain.
1392
01:36:46,383 --> 01:36:49,260
Because of her, thousands
of Frenchmen will be free someday.
1393
01:36:49,595 --> 01:36:52,096
For France, I do this!
1394
01:36:53,182 --> 01:36:55,642
Smoking is forbidden.
1395
01:37:01,732 --> 01:37:04,212
You've got to help me!
There are lots of dreadful men after me!
1396
01:37:11,742 --> 01:37:14,035
This is no place for a working girl.
Come on!
1397
01:37:14,078 --> 01:37:17,288
Here I am, fellas! Goody! Goody!
1398
01:37:17,498 --> 01:37:20,917
There's one in there, one in there,
another one in there. I'm off!
1399
01:37:25,422 --> 01:37:26,923
Michael, there you are.
1400
01:37:27,007 --> 01:37:28,299
Hello there!
1401
01:37:28,759 --> 01:37:31,761
- Who is your fiancée?
- Welcome to the Chateau Chantelle.
1402
01:37:32,137 --> 01:37:35,014
Some girl called and she said
she was meeting you here
1403
01:37:35,099 --> 01:37:36,724
and she said she was your fiancée.
1404
01:37:36,767 --> 01:37:39,269
That's absurd because you're
my fiancée, and I...
1405
01:37:39,562 --> 01:37:41,331
Come on, let's go to your room
and have a talk.
1406
01:37:41,355 --> 01:37:43,106
My room? Yes, well...
1407
01:37:43,816 --> 01:37:46,776
How about a nice little ride in the country.
It's so pretty...
1408
01:37:46,902 --> 01:37:49,904
I've been driving all day.
I want to sit down and speak to you.
1409
01:37:49,947 --> 01:37:51,827
Sit down and speak to me?
Let's go into the bar!
1410
01:37:52,199 --> 01:37:55,076
- We can have a nice drink and...
- I'd like to do it in private,
1411
01:37:55,619 --> 01:37:57,579
because I may have to scream
and throw things,
1412
01:37:57,621 --> 01:37:59,372
and I think we should be alone for that.
1413
01:38:00,291 --> 01:38:01,374
A sense of humor.
1414
01:38:01,584 --> 01:38:04,502
I've been looking all over for you.
You're the only one that can help me!
1415
01:38:06,714 --> 01:38:08,590
- Our Father...
- Who is that woman?
1416
01:38:08,841 --> 01:38:11,175
Never mind who I am,
but you are in great danger.
1417
01:38:11,260 --> 01:38:13,887
What do you mean "never mind"?
I demand an explanation!
1418
01:38:13,971 --> 01:38:16,764
- Don't lose your temper!
- I will lose it!
1419
01:38:18,267 --> 01:38:19,434
Calm yourself.
1420
01:38:20,811 --> 01:38:23,855
Now, listen. In the first place,
I haven't got another fiancée.
1421
01:38:24,356 --> 01:38:27,483
In the second place,
you don't trust me in the first place.
1422
01:38:30,321 --> 01:38:31,487
Fritz!
1423
01:38:34,575 --> 01:38:36,326
Anna, before you use that spear,
1424
01:38:36,368 --> 01:38:39,871
may I explain to you that what you see
happening here is merely an illusion?
1425
01:38:39,955 --> 01:38:41,164
- An illusion?
- An illusion!
1426
01:38:41,665 --> 01:38:44,167
Shut the door, count three, four, if you like,
1427
01:38:44,251 --> 01:38:47,086
but close the door,
and you'll see it's just an illusion!
1428
01:38:48,213 --> 01:38:50,214
One, two, three!
1429
01:38:51,842 --> 01:38:53,968
Foiled by a cheap cinematic trick!
1430
01:38:54,345 --> 01:38:56,471
If you insist, you can surely see my room.
1431
01:38:56,680 --> 01:38:59,349
You have got some pretty tall
explaining to do, my dear.
1432
01:38:59,391 --> 01:39:02,352
I have never seen
that woman before in my life!
1433
01:39:02,645 --> 01:39:04,854
I thought you were here
for a quiet weekend of work!
1434
01:39:04,980 --> 01:39:06,820
Of course I'm here
for a quiet weekend of work!
1435
01:39:06,982 --> 01:39:09,025
It's a charming spot,
no one ever comes here.
1436
01:39:09,318 --> 01:39:12,028
- And how much work have you done?
- I've only just got here!
1437
01:39:12,571 --> 01:39:14,822
- Can I see your room?
- Certainly. It's over there.
1438
01:39:14,907 --> 01:39:16,991
It's a perfectly ordinary room.
1439
01:39:18,160 --> 01:39:20,244
- Listen, pussycat...
- I don't think so.
1440
01:39:20,496 --> 01:39:21,621
Listen. It is!
1441
01:39:21,705 --> 01:39:25,166
No, I won't spend my whole life
waiting around for you.
1442
01:39:31,382 --> 01:39:33,216
Nothing like a hard day's work, huh?
1443
01:39:33,592 --> 01:39:36,052
Look here. I came here alone.
This crowd showed up.
1444
01:39:36,345 --> 01:39:38,972
It's been a tremendous mistake.
I know because I made it.
1445
01:39:42,393 --> 01:39:45,853
Michael, darling.
Please, don't let them take me!
1446
01:39:46,105 --> 01:39:48,648
Perfect stranger.
Lucky guess about the name.
1447
01:39:50,943 --> 01:39:53,903
Michael, everyone is insane.
Please, take me away from this place.
1448
01:39:53,988 --> 01:39:55,279
Who is that woman?
1449
01:39:55,364 --> 01:39:58,199
She's only 12 and she's an orphan
and once a year, I take...
1450
01:39:58,951 --> 01:40:01,536
Save me.
They're after me, and I did nothing!
1451
01:40:01,704 --> 01:40:03,830
Put that in the shower!
1452
01:40:04,873 --> 01:40:07,041
Here I am, you French hunk of pie!
1453
01:40:07,084 --> 01:40:08,167
Stay back!
1454
01:40:08,252 --> 01:40:10,670
Stick it in the tub and drown it, you twit!
1455
01:40:10,963 --> 01:40:12,797
Not in here, you fool! I'm hiding!
1456
01:40:14,091 --> 01:40:16,634
Michael, this hotel
has the strangest people!
1457
01:40:17,011 --> 01:40:18,636
Why did you abandon me?
1458
01:40:18,971 --> 01:40:21,097
- She has a Ph.D.
- In what?
1459
01:40:23,308 --> 01:40:25,935
You fool!
Just when I was trying to give up smoking!
1460
01:40:30,441 --> 01:40:32,275
Michael, what a pleasant surprise.
1461
01:40:32,359 --> 01:40:34,110
My compliments to the chef!
1462
01:40:37,823 --> 01:40:39,407
- Who are you?
- I'm delighted!
1463
01:40:39,450 --> 01:40:40,616
I'm Carole.
1464
01:40:43,245 --> 01:40:44,954
I kill him! I kill everybody!
1465
01:40:59,053 --> 01:41:01,679
You don't understand!
There are people in here trying to sleep!
1466
01:41:04,433 --> 01:41:05,475
Who is that thing?
1467
01:41:05,642 --> 01:41:07,082
That isn't a thing. That is my wife.
1468
01:41:07,144 --> 01:41:09,979
This is a personal friend of James Bond!
1469
01:41:10,189 --> 01:41:11,481
- How dare you?
- How dare you?
1470
01:41:11,815 --> 01:41:13,274
Pussycat, I do assure you.
1471
01:41:13,609 --> 01:41:15,985
Take all the pussycats,
stand them all in a row...
1472
01:41:16,070 --> 01:41:17,630
Can you tell me who are all these people?
1473
01:41:17,654 --> 01:41:19,489
You stand above them
like a mountain of snow.
1474
01:41:19,573 --> 01:41:22,158
- What's going on here?
- Carole!
1475
01:41:22,493 --> 01:41:23,826
Mother! Dad! Come over here!
1476
01:41:23,952 --> 01:41:26,287
- Did you set the date yet?
- We're about to.
1477
01:41:26,663 --> 01:41:28,081
What's the matter? You look sick.
1478
01:41:37,883 --> 01:41:39,175
The police!
1479
01:42:00,197 --> 01:42:01,697
Anna, up the front!
1480
01:42:04,868 --> 01:42:06,077
Form up, everyone!
1481
01:42:11,667 --> 01:42:13,084
Charge!
1482
01:42:35,774 --> 01:42:37,817
There lies our only
conceivable way of escape!
1483
01:42:38,318 --> 01:42:39,527
Quick! Pell-mell!
1484
01:43:04,011 --> 01:43:05,428
Away you go!
1485
01:43:39,963 --> 01:43:41,297
Carole!
1486
01:45:12,848 --> 01:45:16,225
Michael James,
upon this solemn occasion,
1487
01:45:17,060 --> 01:45:20,062
do you take this woman
to be your lawful married wife?
1488
01:45:20,480 --> 01:45:21,480
I do?
1489
01:45:22,232 --> 01:45:24,734
Do you, Carole Hildegard Werner,
1490
01:45:24,985 --> 01:45:27,903
take this man
to be your lawful wedded husband?
1491
01:45:28,405 --> 01:45:29,488
I do.
1492
01:45:31,074 --> 01:45:33,075
Best man, have you the ring?
1493
01:45:34,911 --> 01:45:35,953
I do.
1494
01:45:41,335 --> 01:45:43,127
We live in perilous times.
1495
01:45:43,587 --> 01:45:45,629
Look after it. It belongs to my wife.
1496
01:45:55,390 --> 01:45:59,101
I now pronounce you man and wife.
1497
01:46:07,527 --> 01:46:09,528
- Merci, Monsieur Mayor.
- Madame.
1498
01:46:11,281 --> 01:46:13,115
Thank you for everything you did for him.
1499
01:46:20,832 --> 01:46:22,833
Well, Mayor, there's gratitude for you.
1500
01:46:23,752 --> 01:46:25,586
You raise a patient, treat him like a son,
1501
01:46:25,879 --> 01:46:29,715
slave all day over a hot analyst couch,
what do you get in return?
1502
01:46:29,800 --> 01:46:31,967
They don't even invite you
on the honeymoon.
1503
01:46:33,428 --> 01:46:34,970
What is your full name, please?
1504
01:46:37,474 --> 01:46:41,477
Michael Voltaire James, pussycat.
1505
01:46:43,146 --> 01:46:44,814
And yours, Madame?
1506
01:46:45,649 --> 01:46:47,650
Carole Hildegard Werner.
1507
01:46:48,318 --> 01:46:50,986
- Why are you snapping then?
- Why did you call her "pussycat"?
1508
01:46:51,029 --> 01:46:53,197
I was being courteous. I was being civil.
1509
01:46:53,281 --> 01:46:55,681
We're married 30 seconds
and already you look at other women!
1510
01:46:55,784 --> 01:46:57,095
I had to look at her. She was talking to me.
1511
01:46:57,119 --> 01:46:59,829
I looked in the direction
the sound was coming from!
1512
01:47:00,372 --> 01:47:01,831
You can go on the honeymoon alone!
1513
01:47:05,252 --> 01:47:07,962
I'm the witness, also the best man.
1514
01:47:08,255 --> 01:47:13,843
My name is
Fritz Wolfgang Sigismund Fassbender.
1515
01:47:14,594 --> 01:47:17,430
What's the matter, darling?
You look a little worried.
1516
01:47:17,514 --> 01:47:19,348
I can't spell Sigismund.
1517
01:47:21,643 --> 01:47:25,062
I think you have a little sexual block
over the spelling of that naughty name.
1518
01:47:26,440 --> 01:47:29,275
Allow me to help you.
I'm a psychoanalyst, among other things.
1519
01:47:29,526 --> 01:47:31,193
Michael, you didn't change at all.
1520
01:47:31,361 --> 01:47:33,821
All this good doctor's work
has been in vain!
1521
01:47:36,366 --> 01:47:38,284
Perhaps I haven't lost a son.
1522
01:47:38,618 --> 01:47:40,369
Maybe I've gained another patient.
1523
01:47:40,704 --> 01:47:42,913
Now, look. Please, sit down.
114571
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