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Zulu
You know Dostoevsky?
Old russian writer, crazy as all hell.
Wrote this book called The Double.
I first read a very bad translation of it back in college.
It's the story of this guy who meets his doppelganger,
which is a double, a look-alike...
a long lost twin who exists to destroy you.
Pleasant thought, huh?
Hey, everybody, drinks are on me!
In the story, the double slowly takes over every aspect of the main character's life...
Public and private.
Carol, honey, I'm home.
You gotta get out of here.
And the story, of course, ends in madness.
Our hero is carted off to a lunatic asylum,
and the double emerges as the victor.
Since college, I'd always considered the double
to be one of my favorite reads until I came to San Diego.
I'd like to make a donation.
My name is Teddy Rist... Teddy Rist... You talk to much.
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Walter
That is your name, right, Walter?
Do you consider yourself to be a responsible human being, Walter?
Yes, I do.
Most of my life,
I've always been thoroughly irresponsible...
unreliable, self-absorbed.
Gerard, where am I?
Malibu.
Right, and what did I say about Malibu?
No interruptions.
So why are you interrupting me?
Because your Fredrik Oma has arrived.
Oh, okay.
Right across from my desk, above the fireplace.
And Gerard, do be careful with it.
You really don't want to know
how much that little masterpiece cost me.
Duly noted. What's it called?
It's called "shadows."
Teddy, while I've got you, quick question.
If you insist.
Did you pass through San Diego over the last few weeks?
Um, sorry, not following.
Buzin in accounting noticed you have credit card charges in San Diego
on days my calendar's got you either here in New York or negotiating there in L.A.
Okay, well, obviously they are late in being processed.
Just hold on.
Dax, when were we last in San Diego?
Not since the Michaelson sisters in march.
The Michaelson sisters.
Gerard, what are the charges?
A car rental,
a suit, some restaurants,
a ten grand donation to a local hospital.
Come again?
Yeah, ten grand to the San Diego V.A. hospital new transportation fund.
Someone's using my credit card to make charitable donations?
That's an odd way to misbehave.
But I guess everyone behaves badly from time to time.
Third call since we got here.
His soup will get cold.
No, Philip's no better, Renee.
I'm surprised he's not standing there with the phone sewn to his ear as well.
I had it surgically removed just for today.
Oh, thank you.
Sorry, sorry.
Your wife was about to organize a rescue mission, man.
Everything okay, honey?
Yes, fine.
So what was I saying?
Oh, yeah.
So we left Saint Martin on Sunday.
Ken, please, will you let it go?
We've been waiting weeks to see Olivia and Philip.
Sorry, I need to take this.
Kenneth Adams? Yeah?
Special Agent Ron Logan, FBI.
You're under arrest.
This has got to be a mistake, man.
Please, sir, do not interfere.
Come with me, sir.
Flight t143, this is San Diego international.
You are cleared to land.
Dax, how long?
About ten minutes.
You know, if someone's using your credit card,
you could just cancel it.
yeah, but he or she has been using my card to make charitable donations.
That's exactly the kind of nefarious bastard I want to meet.
And besides, it should have been me making donations to the V.A. hospital.
Will you pass me that phone?
Gerard has been emailing me some of the charges already.
The Hilton hotel or the Mirror nightclub.
Hilton Hotel, Mirror nightclub.
Mirror nightclub.
Ancient greeks believed that all men are influenced by two very different gods:
Apollo and Dionysus.
Apollo was the god of wisdom and dionysus, well...
Dionysus just liked to have a cracking good time.
Yeah, can I get a blanton's on the rock, please?
Blanton's.
Hello, Ben Franklin.
I'll tell you what.
You can keep the change if you can answer me a question.
Do you know of a fella named Teddy Rist who's been coming in here recently?
Sure.
Wasn't working, but I heard the stories.
Yeah?
Bought rounds for the entire bar twice over.
Everyone's been talking about him since.
They've never seen a guy party so hard.
Well, if that's not a challenge.
See those bottles?
Pour those until they're empty for the whole place.
You're back.
Hey, everybody!
Teddy Rist is back.
You came back to my club,
back to the scene of the crime.
No, Walter.
I didn't come back.
I wasn't there the first time.
You know, you rich guys,
you pay for bottle service and you expect everyone to hang on your ever syllable.
Well, I'm not one of your lackeys.
I don't believe a word that's coming out of those lips.
Ask your staff.
I was beloved by one and all.
Oh, maybe don't buy every bottle.
Ouch.
"Ass bag"?
Yeah, it's a bit below the belt, isn't it?
I think your imposter knows we're in town.
Right.
No more diversions.
I want to find this guy.
Ass bag indeed.
Our next stop was the San Diego Hilton.
Hi. Good evening.
My name's Teddy Rist.
I checked in here on the, um...
Oh, Mr. Rist, I've got you right here.
What can I do for you?
So sorry, just locked my key in my room.
Sure, not a problem. One moment.
There you are.
Thank you very much.
Oh, what room is it again?
So many hotels.
422.
Thank you.
You want to blame this whole brouhaha on some other Teddy Rist.
But what I want is for you to confess.
Oh, Walter, taking responsibility for my own behavior is one thing,
but taking it for somebody else is, what...
Well, that just sucks.
What I'm saying is that for a long time I just looked out for me and me alone.
Wait a minute.
I was gonna knock.
He didn't use a pillow to bash out those car windows.
Yeah.
But I've come to realize that there are other people I need to think about,
other people to take care of.
Turn around.
Sometimes all that includes people who screw me over.
What are you doing? Oh, God.
You, over there. Oh, my God.
May I ask, where are we going?
Someplace nice and quiet
where you can whisper the truth.
Correct me if I'm wrong, Walter,
but I'm getting the distinct impression that you don't believe a word I say.
What, that you're not Teddy Rist?
No, no.
No, that there is somebody who is impersonating me.
Right.
And you found this mystery man in his boxers at the Hilton hotel.
No.
Well, not exactly.
Who are you?
Look, my wallet's in my pants.
Along with my credit card, yeah?
Let me introduce myself.
I'm Teddy Rist.
You can put your hands down now.
And put on your pants.
So?
You're Teddy Rist?
And you are?
Michael Whitmere,
Corporal U.S. marine corps veteran,
but I don't understand.
If you're you, then who was that other guy?
So I'm at the veterans' outreach center just waiting for my name to get called,
and this guy comes up and says that he wants to help me.
So I tell him what's what.
You know, that our apartment caught fire.
Everything was destroyed.
And, you know,
he says that he'd like to put us up in a hotel
until we could get back on our fee introduces himself as Teddy Rist.
What did the other Teddy Rist look like?
Nice suit.
Like you just younger.
Other Teddy Rist didn't kick our door in.
Sorry about that.
We'll move out, Mr. Rist. We just...
We didn't realize that we were doing anything wrong.
We thought...
An angel, you know?
Do you have a job, Corporal?
Sure.
Just not enough money in the bank to put a deposit down on another apartment.
Thank you, Mr. Rist. Hey.
Thank you. Teddy, please.
Just name your firstborn after me or something, yeah?
Gerard. Yes?
Corporal Michael Whitmere is gonna call you.
I'm co-signing his lease and fronting him his first six months' rent.
Why would you pay for the apartment of a total stranger?
Do you remember Tom and Jerry?
Tom would sometimes have a little angel on one shoulder
and then a tiny little devil on the other,
and they'd whisper in his ear as if they were two halves of the same person,
or cat in Tom's case.
Are you gonna ask me to listen to my little angel?
Yeah, sure.
If you can see him, you should.
Oops, he fell.
You know where that story comes from?
It comes from the Qu'ran.
In the Qur'an, there are these two angels
who write down every deed you've ever done...
you know, the good stuff in one book
and the bad stuff in the other.
And then Whichev book is bigger
when you shuffle off this mortal coil,
well, that's... that's what determines where you spend all of eternity.
And eternity, Walt, it's a really long time.
For 16 hours,
the FBI have been sitting in our den.
They've gone through everything...
our investments, our bank accounts,
even our closets.
What exactly are they accusing Kenneth of?
Some kind of fraud or something.
Olivia, I came here because I need a friend.
Of course.
We've ne so much for this city...
Donations, grants, galas.
And now Kenneth's gonna be drawn and quartered.
But if he's innocent, then...
As I think we're both finding, Walt, guilt is easy to presume.
Innocence, a little harder.
I'm sorry.
I swear, it'll never happen again.
Thank you.
Gerard emailed me a list of the rest of the charges...
A restaurant, car rental,
construction company.
About two weeks ago.
About three weeks ago.
Five days ago someone using the name Teddy Rist
came in here and paid for a home renovation.
Teddy who?
You never heard of Teddy Rist?
Are you sure you haven't seen me on tv?
Mm-hmm, pretty sure.
People magazine?
What are you, a cop?
I'm Teddy Rist.
Come back when you're a cop.
Can you not recognize my face?
Yeah, you're Teddy Rist.
Filly.
We've got a team on your job now.
The wheelchair ramp on hardy drive, right?
Well, I'd heard your name of course,
but I'm not a big fan of gossip columns.
And I didn't think there was any reason
why the guy would lie about who he was.
And now he... or in fact me...
is building you a wheelchair ramp.
Well, yeah.
Do you mind me asking what happened?
Well, I left San Diego for Sadr City with two feet and...
Well, anyways, as you can see,
the house is built for a guy with two good legs.
Hey look, I'm sorry.
Where does this exactly leave us?
I'll stop construction today, of course.
It's just that I can't pay you back.
I'm assuming that the ramp isn't the only thing
that could be done to this house to make it more wheelchair-friendly, right?
Well, taking a shower is a bitch and a half.
Yeah, I bet.
Hey, I'm sorry I'm not more help to you finding your guy.
No.
I'm beginning to feel a little like
I'm chasing Robin Hood, you know?
Here's my number.
If you could give my assistant, Gerard, a call
and just tell him what else needs to be done...
on the real Teddy Rist this time.
You're serious?
Yeah.
Just do me a favor and if the faux Teddy
gets in contact with you, just give me a call, yeah?
Yeah, uh, you know,
your being willing to pay for everything, that's huge.
No.
It's nothing.
Well, not to me it's not.
Really, it's... it's nothing.
No, me using my money takes no effort, no sacrifice at all.
Mr. Rist, thank you very much.
It was my honor to meet you.
Thank you.
Teddy, one phone call cancels the card.
No. Okay.
You're getting new charges by the second.
Where?
Leroy's rib barn.
Posted online 30 minutes ago.
I love ribs, all kinds.
I'll give him this...
whoever he is, the man has taste.
Hey, handsome.
Need to relax?
Not just yet, baby.
But do you know if Teddy Rist is here?
We've only got girl strippers.
Right.
Strip clubs,
where all men are created equal.
Let's split up, huh?
Hey, handsome, why don't you come with me?
Looks like we're here.
Your club.
You think I could get a drink
or would that violate vendetta protocol?
If you're gonna die, it's gonna be by my hand,
not the grace of dehydration.
Get the one and only Teddy Rist some water.
Bourbon, please.
So let's not drag this out any longer than we have to here.
I just want to hear you admit the truth.
You slept with my girlfriend, say it.
I'm telling you what happened.
That ain't it.
She already admitted it.
You took her while she was dead drunk.
So why are you questioning me?
Don't you believe her?
I just want to hear it from the horse's mouth.
Walter.
Walter, Walter, Walter.
If only the truth were that simple.
I'm glad Fitz two got away.
I'm glad Fitz two got away.
Now I got you all to myself.
Fitz two?
The guy that you were chasing.
He has a tattoo on his arm.
It said... Fitz two.
Yeah. And you know him?
I'd much rather have your arms around me, sluggo.
You want to be careful.
The last woman who called me sluggo, I married.
I see you're not too hurt.
Nah.
A little love cures all, you know?
I think my double may have a nickname:
Fitz two.
I don't know about that, but he's definitely a marine.
How so?
Mick-map.
Sorry, in english, please.
Marine corps martial arts program is the only way to learn those moves.
They got a base nearby.
We'll check it out first thing tomorrow.
Theodore Rist, leatherneck.
I love a man in uniform.
As children, we imagine ourselves to be soldiers, superheroes,
and in my case, Clint Eastwood.
Inside all ous there is a possibility of being whoever we choose to be.
For most of us, unfortunately,
we end up becoming something quite different.
You're sure?
What about the initial investment?
I'm sorry, used... payouts?
Okay, I'm gonna call you back.
That was James at JP Morgan Chase.
He says that wall street is buzzing
That Kenneth's entire business was a giant ponzi scheme.
Our foundation is...
All of it?
Well, the last time I came to your fine establishment,
I dropped nearly $3,000.
This time, I get a drink thrown in my face.
Clubs, really,
they just don't appreciate repeat customers the way they used to.
Yeah.
Hell no, I'm not missing active duty.
Too busy in first civ div.
Hey, for a case of pogey bait,
can you hooking me up with a face- to-face with Pendleton's actual?
Outstanding.
Alpha mike foxtrot.
Semper fi.
The only part of that I understood were the words "Semper fi".
Got us a meeting.
A buddy of mine is real tight with the C.O. at Camp Pendleton.
Fitz two, you say?
Yeah, that's right.
And how much has this jamoke taken thus far?
About $30,000, sir.
Well, Mr. Rist, we'll help you find the culprit.
And when we catch him, he'll be punished severely.
Colonel Halden, I'm not really military material,
as you've probably ascertained,
but just like the corps I like to dole out punishment in my own way.
Right now I'm not really sure what punishment Fitz two deserves, if any,
and I won't until I see him face-to-face.
Don't make me regret this.
Camp Pendleton's not small.
Might take our colonel some time to locate our man.
So now we just...
Wait.
It's all my fault here, you know.
Come on, let's go.
Oh, dear.
Assbag
Mr. Hertz is not gonna be very happy about this.
Dax Vaughn.
Sergeant, Colonel Halden.
We tracked down your marine.
I'm ready, sir.
Private Dean Fitzsimmons.
He rents an apartment at 20 Magnolia Court in Oceanside.
Play this one right.
Will do, colonel.
You'd think I'd smashed the windows myself.
And they're out of luxury vehicles.
Unbelievable.
Got a name and an address.
Yeah?
Dean Fitzsimmons, huh?
Really?
Will you quit crowding me?
One day you gotta show me how to do that.
Wait here.
All clear.
You see, the truth is, Walter,
that it's easy to believe the worst in ourselves and each other.
What's altogether tougher is...
is accepting the good in ourselves and each other.
Looks like you bought a camcorder.
Hey mom, dad, it's the 17th,
which means I'm shipping out in three days.
And if you're watching this...
I thought about how much you guys miss Nate, how much I do.
I don't know, I just...
I thought you could play this,
you know, if you were really missing me one day.
Mom, I love you.
And I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry your boys are gone.
Dad, uh, I still keep your dog tags next to me every night,
along with Nate's and mine.
Semper fi.
When they, uh...
when they bring me back,
just have them bury me next to Nate,
and that's it.
I love you guys.
All right.
He hasn't been out celebrating at all.
Dean Fitzsimmons has been preparing himself to die.
You know, he's going to war.
He's a marine, Teddy. That's his job.
And fighting in battle doesn't mean you're gonna die.
He's just a scared kid.
Busting car windows and spending your money?
Just 'cause this guy's a marine does not excuse his behavior.
You stay here just in case he shows, huh?
And where are you going?
I figure to where he's gonna send that tape...
His parents.
If he does rock up here, don't you hurt him.
You know, sometimes, walt,
in the morning, if I can be asked to shave,
I look at myself in the mirror,
I wonder who the hell it is I'm looking at.
You know, I'm like Alice.
I want to step through the looking glass
and find the real me somewhere in wonderland.
Of course the problem is that you can't find the real you by staring in the mirror.
You have to step outside yourself and watch from afar.
First the band room, then my office.
Actually, Louise, I really need to talk to you about next year's budget.
Oh, come on, you have to see the new instruments...
All thanks to your foundation.
I'm really sorry.
Bettina, I'm gonna have call you back, yeah.
You're a little old to be selling girl scout cookies.
Are you Brenda Fitzsimmons,
Dean's sister?
Cute.
I guess I won't tell Dean's father,
the captain and a black belt,
about the stranger who tried to hit on his wife.
Ouch. Yeah, best not.
And you are?
Yeah, I'm Teddy Rist. The rich guy.
Yeah, I mean, I like to think of myself
as more than just the rich guy, but yeah.
You know my Dean? How?
I met Dean because he was admiring my '67 Camaro, you know?
He does love his cars. Yeah.
Anyway, I lost his number,
and I had my office try and track him down and we found yours so...
Let's give him a call. Come in.
Oh, thank you so much.
Your husband, is he a marine too?
He was.
Also my father, my brothers,
my husband's father, and now my sons.
Let's try his cell.
That Dean's brother?
Hi, mom. Hey there, stranger.
I have Teddy Rist here.
Hey, Dean.
Mr. Rist.
Please, my parents don't need to get mixed up in this.
I'll do whatever you want.
Yeah, I'm back in town.
I was just wondering, do you want to have that chat?
Yes, fine.
I'll meet you at Blacks Beach in an hour.
Dax.
If when you were in the marines,
you know, a genie had a lamp...
It doesn't work that way.
The genie doesn't give you the lamp.
The lamp gives you the genie.
Okay, so anyway, there's this genie,
and he says he can get you out of your tour of duty,
would you take him up on the offer?
Nah. No?
My time in the corps is something I'm most proud of, Ted.
Yeah, but, you know, knowing all you know now...
and the horrors of battle, the rest of it...
isn't that something you would rather have not experienced?
You know, because I'm thinking I want to call Colonel Halden
and try to keep dean away from Afghanistan.
Negative.
Negative?
Look, I've gone along with every crazy idea you've ever had.
Hell, I've even walked in front of you for half of them,
but right now you're crossing the line.
Dax, Dax.
Brenda Fitzsimmons has already buried one child.
Damn it, Teddy, you cannot take honor from a marine.
Hhey... You can't do that.
If I have the opportunity for her not to experience that again,
Then shouldn't I be taking it?
I don't think Dean is going to show.
Olivia, thank you so much for coming.
You're a true friend.
Olivia, I've been meaning to call you.
Obviously there's a lot I wanted to exp...
I've given you enough time to confess.
Now I'm losing my patience and my temper.
What are you gonna accomplish by losing your temper, huh?
Now if we could just get back to Dostoevsky.
Enough!
What I want, simple. Tell me what happened.
Admit it, walt, part of you believes your girlfriend,
and part of you just doesn't.
Larry, Drew, cooler now.
This is what happens when you pick up my girlfriend in my club.
What the hell's going on here?
This is the ass bag that took advantage of you.
That's not Teddy Rist.
Finally.
What... what are you talking about?
His I.D. says it's him.
Babycakes, that's not the creep.
Okay, Walter,
would you kindly let me go?
Uh, yeah, there seems to have been some confusion.
Yeah.
Untie him.
Awkward.
Yeah.
Okay, Walter, just give me the bat, huh?
Or would you rather I call the police?
Now I'm gonna go upstairs,
and I am gonna break every bit of glass that I can find,
because you owe me for this long night's journey into dawn,
for the bruises on my kisser,
but most importantly for Mr. Hertz
and all his bloody cars.
Yeah, uh, Teddy.
I walked you to your room.
Hey, don't worry. It's not your fault.
They were inside the room.
Who are these clowns?
They're the car window smashers.
Yeah, Dean slept with the guy's girl pretending to be me.
Ironically, probably would have slept with her myself.
Thank you so much.
I spread myself too thin.
I should have paid more attention to the finances.
I'm as responsible as Kenneth Adams is.
We all could have be more thorough.
I cancelled six meetings today
because people were gonna ask me for help,
and I can... I can no longer say yes.
Babe, we're gonna rebuild the foundation.
I swear.
It's just gonna take a little time.
If Teddy and I could give you a truckload of money, we would.
It's just all tied up in assets.
Just gonna have to be...
creative in our fundraising.
Go ahead, Gerard.
I reached the San Diego police.
Dean was arrested.
That's why he wasn't at blacks beach.
He was pulled over for speeding.
Cops found your credit card,
asked him some questions he couldn't answer.
"Fitz two.
real name Dean Fitzsimmons.
One charge reckless driving.
Nine charges credit card fraud.
Nine charges identity theft, account takeover."
I got my card back.
What are you gonna do?
I have three options.
One,
I drag you out of here and I let my private security detail
and rip your toenails out.
Two, I press charges and see you off to the brig.
And three,
I ask some questions, you give some answers,
we see how it goes from there.
You know, I never...
How and why did you steal my credit card?
A few weeks ago, I flew to New York with a few buddies.
We'd never been there and we wanted to paint the tow before we ship out.
Right, to Afghanistan.
Yeah.
We managed to get into bungalow 8.
And you came in and sat down in the booth next to us.
And I knew all about you from the L.A. Times.
You bought drinks for the entire place, us included.
And then I watched you pay,
stumble out forgetting your card,
so I picked it up,
and I tried to follow you, but I lost you in the crowd.
So, uh...
I put the card in my pocket.
And then?
And then when I got back to California,
I thought about that night and about going to war.
What I did was wrong.
But I might never have had the chance to do the things that I did these past few weeks,
the things that you do every day.
My brother never had the chance,
so I bought some drinks, and I met some girls,
and I helped some people.
I felt good, Mr. Rist. Dean...
I did, and I'm sorry, but you know what, if I...
Dean, are you gonna... are you gonna listen to me?
I'm dropping the charges.
Let him out.
Fitz one was your brother Nate, huh?
Yeah.
Mr. Rist, I just want to say...
Look, Dean, now I've been young, God knows.
I've been stupid.
But I'm a tad older now, and I know the limits of what I can and I cannot do.
You know, I can't end the war, for example.
But I can help your folks avoid having to bury another child.
I mean, having to do that once is...
It's hard.
To do it twice would be...
So I'm not gonna let that happen.
In fact, you've been transferred.
Transferred?
Embassy security, Cape Town, South Africa,
consulate general's office. You can't do that.
I spoke to Colonel Halden this morning,
and he's gonna give you your new orders tomorrow.
But my squad, we've been together since boot camp, sir.
They're gonna be fighting in Afghanistan while I'm watching a door? That's not...
This is your punishment.
Instead of going to prison, instead of going to war,
you're getting to live, buddy.
But those are my friends.
Hey, go home.
Spend some time with your mom and dad.
Hey.
San Diego V.A. hospital,
I'd like to donate $100,000.
You're back. I certainly am.
It's for wheelchair-accessible vans for disabled veterans.
Teddy, I can't.
Why not?
What's up?
There's no money.
What?
I can't give you $10, let alone $100,000.
Kenneth Adams.
Kenneth Adams.
A few weeks, a month or two at most,
and I will have the foundation back on track.
I promise.
Priority shipping to the Saatchi Glery, London.
Buzin in accounting said the money transfer went through.
Cash should be in the foundation's account already.
You are too good to me, Gerard.
Thank you.
Morning, Olivia.
I would like to request San diego V.A. hospital donation one more time.
Teddy, I told you...
Have you checked the account this morning?
What did you do?
But I don't want the donation in my name.
Whose name do you want it under?
Hello?
Dean Fitzsimmons? Yes.
This is Karen Manning,
Director of the San Diego V.A. hospital.
I wanted to call and thank you personally.
Uh, for what?
For your donation, of course,
in your brother Nate's name.
Those vans will really make a difference
for all the veterans and all of us.
Mr. Fitzsimmons, your brother won't be forgotten.
Thank you. You're welcome.
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