Original subtitles

Happiness.

Happiness is the art of living well.

And these days, not many people are living well.

And the few who are...

Well, to me, they don't seem very happy.

I'm happy. Most of the time.

Well... to be honest,

I have more than my share of demons.

And sometimes they chase me.

And sometimes I chase them.

And so there I was,

racing through a jungle in Nigeria.

Racing against time.

Racing against myself.

Wondering how the hell I'd gotten there.

Feeling as if someone

kept pushing back the finish line.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

You expect me to believe this crap?

I was simply trying

to get the cholera vaccine to the village

before all the people there died.

Man, I've heard some pickup lines,

but yours takes the blue ribbon.

I am not trying to pick you up.

Well, I am, actually. But I am not lying to you.

Oh, oh, yeah, yeah. So you're Teddy Rist,

the billionaire businessman.

Up by the bootstraps without a dime of bailout money.

Right, Teddy Rist the playboy.

I have dated one or two well-known attractive women.

Teddy Rist the party boy.

I do like a good time. Do you?

Sure.

But a good time didn't bring you to Tartansville.

No, my plane developed a mechanical problem

on its way back over the Atlantic.

Your plane. Uh-huh.

It's a new fuel-efficient model.

It's practically a hybrid. Oh, yeah.

I... I like a man who's green.

But, you know, I still don't believe

that you're Teddy Rist

and that you were slogging vaccine

through the african jungle.

Okay, would it help if I told you

that initially I was in Nigeria

purely for business purposes?

I was there to put the finishing touches

to an oil deal.

Now, I was sleeping off a night of bacchanalia.

It's the ancient greek word

for just way too much of everything.

Mr. Rist, please open the door.

It says "do not disturb" on the...

Mr. Rist! Door.

Oh.

Ugh. Aah!

Okay.

Yeah.

Yes? What?

I'm... I'm sorry, Mr. Rist.

Um, the storm has flooded this area.

Homes are gone. Many are drowned.

We must evacuate at once.

Okay.

But there better be coffee.

Calm down.

Move to higher ground as soon as possible.

No, no, no.

They're taking us to higher ground.

Yes. Please remain calm, everybody.

Gerard, I want out of this godforsaken hellhole,

like, yesterday.

I'll call air traffic control,

the U.S. consulate,

and the prime minister. Right.

Mr. Rist!

The cop says that the airport has been washed away.

This way! Mister, come!

And that's when I saw him.

This kid.

Teddy? Mr. Rist.

Teddy?

What? Hey.

Mr. Rist. There's a kid over there.

He should go first.

The boy? Yes.

He's a beggar. A no one.

Get in, there's no time. No, he should go first.

Mr. Rist.

The boy. In first.

I am not gonna die here!

Out of my way! Move!

Wait! Wait for me! Hey, what are you doing?

Aah!

Come on.

Mr. Rist!

You have to understand, I am so not the heroic type.

Reckless, yes. Superman? Hardly.

Hey, look at me.

You gotta let go.

You gotta look at me.

You gotta look at me, kid.

That's it.

What's your name, huh?

What's your name?

Hey, I know. I know it's scary.

It's all right.

Look, hey.

See those guys up there?

Where do you... where do you live?

Where do you live? K... K

Kajuru. Kajuru.

Okay, okay.

We'll get you to Kajuru.

Hey, kid, what's your name?

What's...

Kind of, I... I saved the kid,

but in an odd way, he saved me.

All right, look.

I've got other customers.

No, no. wait, wait, wait. Let... let her deal with them.

Come on.

Uh, may I?

I will give you $1,000

to keep listening

and pouring.

So after the hurricane, Nigeria was...

Well, it was like New Orleans post-Katrina, you know?

Nothing worked.

People were homeless and hungry.

So I did what any sensible man would do.

I got the hell out of there. Went straight back to New York.

And let me guess, you have a huge corner office

in a skyscraper high above Manhattan.

As a matter of fact, yes, I do.

But then, I am co-C.E.O. of Maidstone-Rist incorporated, so.

Oh, right, don't tell me, Mr. co-C.E.O.

Your company makes bologna.

No, no, no.

We buy and sell natural resources,

so, uh, copper, oil, ethanol.

Anything profitable that comes from god's green earth.

Okay, so if you're Rist, who's maidstone?

That'll be Philip Maidstone.

The co-C.E.O., my best friend.

Stocks are down ten points. Phil.

We needed the Nigeria deal.

Phil, please do not worry.

We will open that oil field.

How? The infrastructure around...

No, listen. I have a plan.

I am going to go back to Nigeria and offer the government there...

Ted. Ted. A higher percentage

their first year... Teddy!

What the hell is wrong with you?

It's over. The deal is finished.

There is no going back.

Do I know the Nigerian ambassador?

Yep, you, uh, got him drunk at the moma benefit.

And then there's Olivia, who runs

our corporation's nonprofit foundation.

And perhaps one of the most extraordinary women

in the solar system.

Sounds like you two had a past.

Yes, indeed. As intense as it was brief.

Teddy, I told you.

We're writing a check for $100,000

to the Nigerian relief fund.

Checks are fine, but I want to do something more.

There's a town there called Kajuru.

I'd like to send a package. Some... some food.

Clothing, I guess. Um, some blankets.

What happened in Nigeria, Teddy?

And I want to do that tomorrow, you know?

Get it there tomorrow.

Ookay, you know what? Listen to me.

Since you've been back, you have been all coiled up.

You want to tell me about it?

What happened in Nigeria, Teddy?

You better be taking his pulse.

My fortune.

Wait a minute.

Olivia is Philip's wife?

Didn't I mention that?

Oh, and Teddy, do not forget your interview

with CNBC at 3:30.

Uh, buh... interview?

To discuss the relationship we're doing.

Profit and corporate giving.

I asked you weeks ago. Can't we postpone it?

No.

Oh, and, um, Julia called me twice.

There's something she really wants

to talk to you about, okay?

Julia?

You mean there is another woman in your life besides me?

Who's this Julia?

Let me get back to you on that one, huh?

I tell you about dax,

my general factotum?

My bodyguard? You have a bodyguard?

Oh, yes.

Ted, the plane needs a complete tune-up.

Dax, can't you go any faster?

You don't get to be 99th richest person in the world

with hugs and kisses alone.

So who is she?

The mysterious Julia.

Your dominatrix?

No.

My ex-wife.

Julia?

Wow, look who the trade winds blew in.

What are you doing?

Ah, what am I doing?

Uh, I have, uh, a roller and some paint.

I'm water-skiing.

Why didn't you tell me you were doing this?

Oh, I called you, Teddy.

And, um, I let you know

that I was gonna box up Bobby's toys and clothes.

But... but you never got back to me.

And then I... I texted you,

and I told you that I was donating his bed

to St. Mary's orphanage, and I never heard back.

And then I emailed you and said

that I was going to paint his room.

I don't understand how you could do this.

Teddy, it's been almost a year.

This room became an addiction to me.

I would come in here every day and sit on bobby's bed

and hold his Teddy bear and rock back and forth

for hours.

There is a time to grieve,

and there's a time to move on.

I have something for you.

I saved a box of bobby's stuff for you.

I thought you'd especially want these.

Hmm.

He and I used to play with this for hours on...

You really should've been here, Teddy.

I'll never forgive you for this, you know?

God, losing your son.

That must be so harsh.

Harshness knows no borders.

Anyway, i had to put on my public face and do

this in-depth interview.

Teddy Rist, talking head.

Sorry. Am I late? Yes.

Teddy. Makeup.

Oh.

Hey, get that package to Kajuru, huh?

Listen, Teddy, today is really important.

Can we talk about it later? Here, sit.

Yeah, sit.

Analysts project that by adding 20 new global projects,

Maidstone-Rist will be one of the first companies

to, uh, post record profits next year.

People want to know,

how do you intend to spend your money?

Well, yes, despite the current economic crisis,

we, uh, we will be paying handsome dividends

back to our shareholders.

But most importantly, I'm very proud to announce

that we have doubled our philanthropic contributions

to 1.8% of net revenue by donations

to the charity foundation that we have here.

That's quite a commitment.

Well, yes.

We... feel that we have...

not only an obligation to our, uh,

to our shareholders, but also to, uh...

Uh, the sharp end of social...

It... it really is a...

A...?

A... a priority. It's a priority for us.

I'm sure the recipients of your generosity are...

are deeply grateful to you for all your contributions...

Just stop. Oh, stop.

Please stop.

1.8%.

Mr. Rist, I'm sorry.

No, no, no, I'm sorry. I'm...

I'm sorry. For?

I just can't do this. I can't do it.

Olivia, Philip.

I can't be here.

I'm sorry, everybody.

Could you excuse us for a minute?

Everybody.

Uh, five minutes. Sorry. Sorry.

Thank you. Sure, yeah. guys?

What are you doing?

I'm going to Nigeria.

Teddy, listen to me, please.

We need you here.

Company's called Maidstone-Rist.

We need Rist here.

I'm leaving now. Teddy, you can't.

Hey.

If you can't deliver that package to Kajuru, then I will.

I will get it there, but it just might takeKajuru

Well, then you keep trying to get it there,

and you keep doing the 1.8%.

But I am going there,

eyeball to eyeball, and deliver it myself.

See ya.

My normal life didn't seem normal anymore.

I had to do something. Something else.

Something more.

And so I went back to Nigeria.

My goal was simple and clearKajuru

bring medical supplies, blankets, and food

to the people who needed it.

And if I was lucky, to find that little boy.

I had no idea where Kajuru was,

so I started in the capital, Abuja.

I can't believe I let you talk me into this.

Well, you are my head of special projects,

are you not?

Yes, but...

Teddy, come on.

I was hired to spearhead new business develop...

who told you that? The M.B.A. fairy?

Unbelievable.

Carry-go. go.

Is he gonna be back soon?

This is not good.

I'd spent my life watching from a distance.

From behind tinted glass.

And you know what?

I just couldn't do it anymore.

So I stepped out.

And the most amazing thing happened.

How are you doing, huh?

What's that music, huh?

And suddenly, right in front of me, jabba.

A rite of passage festival.

A young man's journey from boyhood to manhood.

I've come here to help. I have money.

Now, I'm aware that you're facing difficulties,

which frankly can't be made any easier,

what with your rebel activity...

I realize that you have money, Mr. Rist.

And if there are rebels,

it is a rebellion against the very corporate intrusion

that companies like yours routinely perpetrate

on sovereign nations like Nigeria.

At any rate, thank you for your visit

to our humble nation.

However, there is nothing for you to do here.

There is always something I can do.

Thank you for your time.

Okay, so that's it. we go home?

No.

The U.S. ambassador is a friend of mine.

Says he knows a doctor who can put us to work.

Great.

And you, where did... where did you learn english?

I received my medical degree from Harvard.

You sure you won't have a drink with us?

No, thank you.

I have a clinic in one of the villages

hit hardest by the hurricane.

Is it nearby? No, it's quite a journey.

Through the jungles and... excuse me.

Do you have anything other than the jim beam?

Like, something maybe from civilization, you know?

No? Don't worry.

Forget it. It's okay, thank you.

Can you get Dax on the horn and, uh,

ask him to make a special delivery?

Dr. Balo, forgive me.

We've come here to help.

And we just keep hitting these... these roadblocks.

So Ambassador Korman thought you might...

there's a box of cholera vaccine at the airport.

It was supposed to be delivered to my clinic days ago.

When it didn't arrive, I drove here to come and fetch it.

But I just can't get the government officials

to release the box to me.

Box of vaccine?

Well, I think that should be within the bandwidth

of our abilities, don't you?

So where did you say your clinic was again?

Kujama.

Two kilometers northeast of Abuja.

That's where I'm going.

That... that's actually the reason

why we came here in the first place.

So... so tell me,

why won't the government release the vaccine?

There's a great deal of corruption in Nigeria.

The officials tell me it's a new import tax.

"Tax" meaning "bribe," right?

Fortunately, I happen to be very good at bribes.

I agreed to meet you, Mr. Rist,

because I thought you were a serious man

who might be able to help me.

But this isn't about helping me

or anyone else, is it?

This is about you playing the role

of the charming, rich businessman

who travels the world,

getting his hands just dirty enough

to go back home and tell his american friends

how meaningful his life is compared to theirs.

I don't have time for role-playing games, Mr. Rist.

A hurricane devastated my village.

People are dying of disease.

And your smiles and reassurances are not going to save them.

Enjoy the rest of your party.

Check?

Dr. Balo, will you stop?

Dr. Balo.

I am going to solve your tax problem.

We are going to get that vaccine,

and I am gonna bring it to Kajuru.

Kajuru.

What does Kajuru have to do with this, Mr. Rist?

I told you my clinic was in Kujama.

Did you?

Kajuru, that's where I need to go.

It's Kajuru. Yeah.

Mr. Rist, you're obviously confused.

Kajuru's the next town over,

but it was destroyed in the storm.

Massive mudslide.

There were survivors, yeah?

It's impossible to say, but I can tell you

there are people alive in Kujama.

Alive and in need of help.

I can... I can do that.

That's what I'm here to do, is to help.

You're gonna have to trust me.

Okay?

Fine.

Let's go.

Teddy, I'm sorry.

She's wrong about you.

No, she's not.

The vaccine was stuck in customs at the airport,

and people in Kujama were dying in droves.

And so I figured all I had to do was grease the wheel.

Hey, sir. Did you drop your cash?

Is that it? Yep.

Told you I'd deal with your tax problem.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

Whoa. Dax, Dax.

Dax.

What is this?

Just, uh, getting a box of, uh, medicine. Vaccine.

That's all. Medicine?

That you think you can just take for yourself

because you offer bribe?

I don't mean any disrespect.

Neither do I, see?

Hello?

Arrested?

What'd he do, start a revolution?

Okay, okay. I'll make the call. Thank you.

Who are you calling?

I'm calling the White House. The White House?

And I suppose he woke up

the president of the United States?

No, Michelle. He did wake up Michelle.

And she called the ambassador in Abuja,

who sent one of his drones to bail us out.

What's next on the schedule? Water-boarding?

We all get a good night's rest,

and we start over in the morning.

No, Mr. Rist, thanks for trying.

It's all been very sweet.

But where I'm going, there'll be no ambassadors or...

I'll get it for you. And I will deliver it tomorrow.

And that is a promise. Goodbye, Teddy.

A.J., have a safe trip home.

Good night, boss.

I knew exactly what Chima was talking about.

I had the heart, but not the belly.

I... I... no.

I'm... no. I'm sorry, guys.

Hey, tomorrow. Mmm?

And so I did what I normally do when I'm depressed.

I set up a meeting with a drug dealer.

What?

When you need theater tickets, you contact the concierge.

Illegal drugs, the doorman.

Hello?

Beautiful night, yes?

Beautiful city too, eh?

Though it's no Manhattan.

You ever been to Manhattan?

Only in the movies.

Someday I would very much like to visit.

Ah, the famous Teddy Rist, eh?

I first saw you on the cover of the Cocorioko magazine

when I was 14 years old.

I wanted to be you more than breathe.

How'd that work out?

Eh. I make a living.

You have a proposition.

I'd hazard a guess, given your line of work,

that you have, on occasion, had the opportunity

to bring one or two items into the country illegally.

For the sake of discussion, yes.

Let's assume I have connections.

There's a box at the airport that I need retrieved.

I'll pay... Ah, please.

Don't insult me, eh?

I couldn't take money from Teddy Rist.

But you know how these transactions work.

One hand washes the other.

Someday, and that day may never come,

I'll call upon you...

To do the same services for me, yeah.

I've seen the movie.

Ah.

I hope you don't mind.

I've invited some guests.

Ah.

They are all orphans.

Hold on.

In the middle of a humanitarian disaster,

you had an orgy?

Gotcha.

I couldn't afford to lose another day.

I had the vaccine, but there was a hitch.

How in the name of God would I get the goods to Kujama?

I thought all I had to do was rent a car.

But I'd forgotten

Nigeria was in the middle of a nervous breakdown.

Mr. Rist. Yes?

I'm terribly sorry, but there's no truck or jeep

available from... What about a helicopter?

That would just get you to the edge of the jungle.

Teddy. Yes? What are you doing here?

Locals want us out, as in off their tarmac.

They said if we don't move the "g" by today,

they're gonna confiscate it.

Okay, what about if I parachuted in?

Yes, you could jump out of a plane,

but you wouldn't survive the landing.

Terrain is too dense.

Wait a minute. I think I got something.

Maidstone-Rist has a factory in Benin, right?

Yeah, just over the border.

Well, Dax and I could take the jet down there,

get a company truck.

I mean, we'd be back in a day or less.

I told her today.

I mean, as a backup plan, that's fine.

So we'll call ahead, get a truck gassed, ready to go.

And I'll wait here and see if I can find something faster.

Well, what are you waiting for?

Go, get out of here. Go.

Whoa.

You never know.

Hello?

I hear you are still in lagos.

Yeah, I hit a snag.

The man in the lobby with a yellow jacket is my driver.

I'll see you here for lunch. One hour.

Why didn't you call me?

I thought I'd run out of luck.

Impossible, eh?

I'll have my helicopter ready for you in one hour.

It will take you over the jos plateaus

to the northern region, where I will have a jeep,

a driver, and some bonbons waiting for you.

Heh.

I can't thank you enough.

But this time, I do insist on paying you.

Olease, don't insult me, eh?

I can't take money from you.

No, Gabriel. Name your price.

$250,000.

Uh-huh.

Nothing like wrestling with a moral dilemma.

You spell your name with one "e," I presume?

Okay, what next?

We were making good time.

Almost at our destination.

I felt like I could exhale for the first time in days.

Until...

We ran into a joint operation

between Nigerian law enforcement and the D.E.A.

We are United States drug enforcement administration.

They ordered us to land or be obliterated.

We landed.

Shut it down!

Shut it down!

Hand over that bag. Aah!

Take it easy, soldier boy.

Okay?

I... aah!

Okay, all right.

Careful with that bag.

I'm sorry, did you say something?

That's enough. You, up.

I can explain all this,

if G.I. Joe would just stop blowing in my face here!

All right! Enough.

Gah. Ugh.

Damn.

What's this?

That's vaccine.

Ah, I can explain that.

It's registered,

but not in Nigeria, and not to me.

Look what I found.

Oh, great.

Wow, that's a big one.

All right.

You have five seconds

to explain what's going on, Mr. Rist.

I'm taking that vaccine to Kujama.

That gentleman was offering me a ride.

Where'd you meet him? At the airport.

Parked his helicopter next to my gulfstream.

You got a gulfstream?

Yeah.

Whew.

G550, brand new.

Oh.

You can have a ride if you like.

Ride? Hell, I'd like to fly it.

Yeah?

I... I got a business card in there.

It's got my private number on it.

Look,

Next time you hitch a ride, Mr. Rist...

Just call me Teddy, huh?

Yeah.

Be a little bit more careful, yeah?

Yeah. Sure.

So how far is it to Kujama from here, commander?

About 25 clicks.

You know, there's a fully-stocked bar

on board that gulfstream.

Walk away, Mr. Rist.

But watch yourself.

The region's swarming with rebels.

They'll shoot at anything.

Hello?

Hello?

Oh, this is so not my day.

It... it's okay.

I... I have some vaccine in here

for the children in Kujama.

Kujama?

Yeah.

Um, does... does this work?

Does it...

Does it work?

Yes?

Do you think I could borrow it and...

Hey, it's okay.

See, it's just a...

Just a phone.

Hello?

Teddy, where the hell are you?

... Told me that you're taking

A vaccine to a village in the jungle.

You want me to give you this?

Gladly.

Teddy?

Okay? We... we done now?

Come on, dude.

Wh... what? what do you want now?

Do you want my watch?

Well, what else? What else you want?

My shoes?

Dancing socks.

Ah, damn it.

Please, come to daddy.

Bobby.

Teddy.

Teddy?

Hey.

Hey.

I made it.

Yeah.

Who would have thought that it's all right?

Yeah.

What?

Nothing.

The vaccine, is it, um,

is it okay, the vaccine?

Working its magic. Look.

Come up.

Careful. Careful. Easy.

Look.

We've already gotten the word out to the nearby villages.

Survivors are coming from all over.

How will I ever repay you?

Her eyes were on fire.

She was so alive.

So beautiful, and...

And we made love that night.

Under a resplendent moon.

Hmm.

Wow, you are so unbelievably...

Full of it.

What? "Resplendent" too much?

Uh-huh.

Yeah. There he is.

Hey, what are you doing here?

Oh, look.

The men from the looney farm

have finally come to take you away.

He even gave me a bogus check for $1,000.

Miss, I wouldn't do that if I was you.

Happy new year.

Come on, you haven't answered my question.

What are you doing here? What am I doing here?

Uh-huh.

Me and Olivia were worried about you, man.

You ran off to Nigeria. You get arrested.

Next thing, you're laying in some village clinic,

dying from a snake bite.

And then I heard the plane had trouble landing.

I had to come and find you.

Wait a minute.

Wait, you mean it's true?

Well, I mean... well, the plane is fixed and ready to rocket.

Listen to me, hmm?

Now that you're back from Nigeria safe,

you are going to have to focus on business.

Yes, I will.

Only business.

Phil, I promise. I will.

From now on,

I leave the philanthropy to Olivia.

I have absolutely no interest

in traipsing through the jungle anymore.

Battling rebels and snakes and tsetse flies,

there's no upside to it.

Oumar.

No return on my investment.

Oumar.

Oumar.

None at all.

Oumar, you sure are, aren't you?

Yeah, you...

You are Oumar, aren't you?

I have...

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