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www.addic7ed.com
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00:00:03,440 --> 00:00:05,919
Tickets this way
for the Chatsworth Express!
3
00:00:06,920 --> 00:00:08,839
Come and watch pikeys
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00:00:08,840 --> 00:00:12,839
making a mess of the lives
they were given by 'im upstairs.
5
00:00:14,400 --> 00:00:17,879
And kids they're
convinced aren't actually theirs.
6
00:00:17,880 --> 00:00:18,919
Stay away!
7
00:00:18,920 --> 00:00:22,279
What sounds on earth
could ever replace
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00:00:22,280 --> 00:00:25,599
kids needing money
or wives in your face?
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00:00:25,600 --> 00:00:28,759
Cos' this, people reckon,
and me included,
10
00:00:28,760 --> 00:00:32,759
is why pubs and drugs
were kindly invented.
11
00:00:33,160 --> 00:00:36,879
To calm us all down,
to stop us going mental.
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00:00:36,880 --> 00:00:40,879
These are Chatsworth Estate's
basic essentials.
13
00:00:41,360 --> 00:00:45,359
We are worth every penny
for grinding your axes.
14
00:00:45,680 --> 00:00:49,679
You shit on our heads
but you pay the taxes.
15
00:00:53,360 --> 00:00:56,799
Imagine a Britain
without Chatsworth buccaneers,
16
00:00:56,800 --> 00:00:59,239
who'd come on your face
for the price of a beer.
17
00:00:59,240 --> 00:01:00,919
Make poverty history!
18
00:01:00,920 --> 00:01:03,439
Cheaper drugs now!
19
00:01:03,440 --> 00:01:07,439
Make poverty history!
Cheaper drugs now!
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00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:19,479
Discussion groups, chat lines,
support networks.
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00:01:19,480 --> 00:01:23,479
The new millennium, the age of the
all-vocalising, all-emoting fuck-up.
22
00:01:25,960 --> 00:01:29,399
Normal men and women spewing the
contents of their troubled souls
23
00:01:29,400 --> 00:01:32,919
into the ears of the uninterested,
excreting the sorry waste of their
24
00:01:32,920 --> 00:01:36,919
emotional innards
into all manner of public places.
25
00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:41,599
Pubs, telly, newspapers.
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00:01:42,720 --> 00:01:46,719
If only they'd zip it and heed their
inner voice, the one that never lies.
27
00:01:48,120 --> 00:01:51,919
The one that screams at
you at the dead of night. Oh, aye.
28
00:01:51,920 --> 00:01:55,919
'Tis better to remain silent and
be thought a repressed old fart than
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00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:59,999
open one's mouth and be discovered
a babblin', self-obsessed fool.
30
00:02:05,880 --> 00:02:07,359
Where his family's concerned,
31
00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:09,679
Paddy Maguire's never been
less than generous.
32
00:02:09,680 --> 00:02:12,759
But a 50 grand blow
would knock any man.
33
00:02:12,760 --> 00:02:15,119
Mam. Settlement.
34
00:02:15,120 --> 00:02:16,919
She set the business up with me,
35
00:02:16,920 --> 00:02:19,399
so it's only fair
she should get half the spoils.
36
00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:23,399
But memories of our time together aren't
going to keep me comfy in my old age.
37
00:02:23,440 --> 00:02:27,199
I need to make serious hay now. There's
a recession on, so people are what?
38
00:02:27,200 --> 00:02:28,239
Skint.
39
00:02:28,240 --> 00:02:29,239
So they borrow money. Then what?
40
00:02:29,240 --> 00:02:30,279
So they borrow money. Then what?
Can't pay it back.
41
00:02:30,280 --> 00:02:34,279
And when these desperados want to forget what monumental
fuck-ups their lives have become, they do what?
42
00:02:35,520 --> 00:02:36,239
Get off their heads.
43
00:02:36,240 --> 00:02:39,999
Get off their heads. Drug sales soar.
Economic gloom equals a pay-day boom!
44
00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:43,399
And I want you in on it.
I want Manchester to know
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00:02:43,400 --> 00:02:45,479
that Maguire & Sons
are back in business.
46
00:02:45,480 --> 00:02:46,839
Not for me, Dad.Not for...
47
00:02:46,840 --> 00:02:47,759
Count me in.
48
00:02:47,760 --> 00:02:49,279
Count me in.
Hang on, what do you mean?
49
00:02:49,280 --> 00:02:51,439
We could make a killing!
What are you on about?
50
00:02:51,440 --> 00:02:52,999
I've got a family.
Good of you to remember.
51
00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:54,239
I've got Karen and
Connor to think of now!
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00:02:54,240 --> 00:02:56,639
I've got Karen and Connor to think of
now! You're barely scraping a living!
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00:02:56,640 --> 00:02:58,199
At least I'm not watching me back
all the fuckin' time.
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00:02:58,200 --> 00:02:59,799
At least I'm not watching me back all the
fuckin' time. And what about you?I'm in, Dad.
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00:02:59,800 --> 00:03:01,719
You still in possession of the
bollocks you were born with?
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00:03:01,720 --> 00:03:03,959
You still in possession of the bollocks you
were born with? Dad, I'm OK with moody weddings.
57
00:03:03,960 --> 00:03:05,679
Oh, you're settling for OK?
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00:03:05,680 --> 00:03:06,719
I'm in.
59
00:03:06,720 --> 00:03:08,159
Never thought I'd see the day.
60
00:03:08,160 --> 00:03:12,159
Sons of mine, gutless, pussy-whipped.
There's more loyalty in those little
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00:03:12,240 --> 00:03:14,159
rats I pay to sell the gear
on the estate.
62
00:03:14,160 --> 00:03:14,999
Look, Dad...
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00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:15,599
Look, Dad...
Get out, all of you.
64
00:03:15,600 --> 00:03:16,639
Look, Dad... Get out, all
of you. I wouldn't mind...
65
00:03:16,640 --> 00:03:20,159
Go on, out!
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00:03:20,160 --> 00:03:24,159
Fuck off!
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00:03:30,320 --> 00:03:31,799
You did say no?
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00:03:31,800 --> 00:03:32,959
Course I said no.
69
00:03:32,960 --> 00:03:36,839
You sound like you're sorry for him.
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00:03:36,840 --> 00:03:38,439
I am his son.
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00:03:38,440 --> 00:03:42,439
Yeah, and he's yours.
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00:03:42,920 --> 00:03:46,919
Oh, what?
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00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:52,359
"Wooh! I'm going to be the best
dressed baby in Chatsworth! Yay!"
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00:03:53,440 --> 00:03:56,519
Christ, Karen, a 150 quid?
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00:03:56,520 --> 00:03:58,999
For him to puke all over it?
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00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:02,999
Get it back, get a refund.
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00:04:03,120 --> 00:04:07,119
Hello?
I'd like to place an order, please.
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00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:39,599
Christ, Carl! Watch where you're
putting it! That was trap two!
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00:04:40,520 --> 00:04:43,319
I was the only one
willing to go along with Dad.
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00:04:43,320 --> 00:04:45,519
He totally blanked me.
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00:04:45,520 --> 00:04:48,919
That's cos you're an ideas person,
like him.
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00:04:48,920 --> 00:04:51,039
A thinker, cerebral.
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00:04:51,040 --> 00:04:53,399
More brains than a
service station pastie.
84
00:04:53,400 --> 00:04:57,399
Now, eh, those balloons aren't going
to blow themselves up, are they?
85
00:04:59,680 --> 00:05:02,879
I mean, I'm an inspired shag, me.
86
00:05:02,880 --> 00:05:04,399
But bum sex?
87
00:05:04,400 --> 00:05:06,039
Why would he want to do that?
88
00:05:06,040 --> 00:05:08,559
You should ask him how he'd like it.
89
00:05:08,560 --> 00:05:09,799
Mm!
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00:05:09,800 --> 00:05:13,799
About Sunday. We're welcoming
our little man into God's family.
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00:05:14,720 --> 00:05:18,599
It's a celebration, yes,
but it's a holy day.
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00:05:18,600 --> 00:05:22,159
So any talk of whoring
or crack pipes is right off. Yeah?
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00:05:22,160 --> 00:05:23,559
I'll see you later.
94
00:05:23,560 --> 00:05:26,839
See you later, Max. I think
I can manage that for you, Mimi.
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00:05:26,840 --> 00:05:30,239
Oh, and if you think I'm cocking up
on me godmum duties,
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00:05:30,240 --> 00:05:32,719
I'm sure you won't
hesitate to pull me.
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00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:36,719
Oh, there's nothing to worry about
there. Because Concepta, my cousin,
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00:05:36,720 --> 00:05:39,199
she's godmum now.
99
00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:40,319
What?
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00:05:40,320 --> 00:05:44,279
With the dancing and touring,poor
love never got chance to havekids.
101
00:05:44,280 --> 00:05:46,399
So I thought it'd
be nice for her to have
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00:05:46,400 --> 00:05:48,519
a little one she can be close to.
103
00:05:48,520 --> 00:05:52,519
You don't begrudge her
having a godson, do you?
104
00:05:56,200 --> 00:05:58,279
Heard the latest from your mother?
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00:05:58,280 --> 00:06:00,519
Me and you
have been dumped as godparents,
106
00:06:00,520 --> 00:06:03,559
cos her cousin and her bloke
are a more glamorous option.
107
00:06:03,560 --> 00:06:05,519
No, it's just you who's been dumped.
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00:06:05,520 --> 00:06:08,119
Concepta ain't got a bloke.
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00:06:08,120 --> 00:06:09,359
You're still godfather?
110
00:06:09,360 --> 00:06:11,919
She only...
Uh, she only told me this morning.
111
00:06:11,920 --> 00:06:14,759
And what was your reaction when
mummy dearest hit you with that one?
112
00:06:14,760 --> 00:06:17,279
And what was your reaction when mummy dearest
hit you with that one? I'm... I'm not arsed, Kel.
113
00:06:17,280 --> 00:06:20,919
Your girlfriend gets shat on
from a great height by your mother
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00:06:20,920 --> 00:06:22,559
and you're not arsed?
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00:06:22,560 --> 00:06:26,519
That's not what I meant! Kel!
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00:06:26,520 --> 00:06:30,199
(HIGH-PITCHED VOICE) Oops-a-daisy.
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00:06:30,200 --> 00:06:31,879
Really looking forward to Sunday.
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00:06:31,880 --> 00:06:35,639
Be nice to have all the
family under one roof again.
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00:06:35,640 --> 00:06:37,279
I think it's time we settled up.
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00:06:37,280 --> 00:06:40,439
For the christening? Come on, 50-50.
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00:06:40,440 --> 00:06:41,959
Paddy, honest, I'm really flush.
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00:06:41,960 --> 00:06:44,679
Paddy, honest, I'm really flush. Mimi,
chuck yourself under the King's horse,
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00:06:44,680 --> 00:06:47,119
gaze at your chuff in a mirror,
but please,
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00:06:47,120 --> 00:06:49,759
in the spirit of equality,
tell me what I owe.
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00:06:49,760 --> 00:06:53,759
OK, you win. 500.
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00:06:54,360 --> 00:06:56,199
You only do it once, don't you?
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00:06:56,200 --> 00:07:00,199
I'll fetch it for you right away.
128
00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:03,839
Dad?
129
00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:06,159
Why don't you just help him collect?
130
00:07:06,160 --> 00:07:07,359
God knows,
you could do with the readies.
131
00:07:07,360 --> 00:07:09,199
God knows, you could do with
the readies. I've told you why.
132
00:07:09,200 --> 00:07:12,919
Well, if not to boost your income,
then to keep an eye out for him.
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00:07:12,920 --> 00:07:14,839
You know better than anyone
what it's like out there.
134
00:07:14,840 --> 00:07:17,839
You know better than anyone what it's like out
there. Dad's covered. Got some lads helping him out.
135
00:07:17,840 --> 00:07:20,879
Has he bollocks! What's he
going to pay them with, Jamie?
136
00:07:20,880 --> 00:07:24,879
There's more brass on a string
quartet than on your dad just now.
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00:07:25,360 --> 00:07:26,519
Think about it.
138
00:07:26,520 --> 00:07:27,559
No!
139
00:07:27,560 --> 00:07:31,559
Now can we just leave it, please?
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00:07:34,600 --> 00:07:37,719
30 grams of coke, 100 of cannabis.
141
00:07:37,720 --> 00:07:39,999
I'll be expecting two grand back.
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00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:43,999
Anything you make on top is yours.
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00:07:45,200 --> 00:07:46,719
Problem?
144
00:07:46,720 --> 00:07:49,079
How are we supposed to make owt
on that?Get creative.
145
00:07:49,080 --> 00:07:51,559
So, besides hiking up the costs
146
00:07:51,560 --> 00:07:54,799
or mixing the gear, have you got
any other creative suggestions?
147
00:07:54,800 --> 00:07:58,799
People ain't thick. They know what
they want and how much it costs.
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00:08:04,040 --> 00:08:08,039
All right, all right.
149
00:08:08,640 --> 00:08:12,479
1,800.
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00:08:12,480 --> 00:08:16,479
Make it quick
if you value your kneecaps.
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00:08:21,880 --> 00:08:23,839
We've been over this.
He's wearing that one.
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00:08:23,840 --> 00:08:26,279
We've been over this. He's wearing that one.
Cos you've got to keep your mother sweet.
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00:08:26,280 --> 00:08:30,279
She's paying for everything because you
managed to spend every penny I put aside.
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00:08:32,800 --> 00:08:36,319
For when he starts on solids.
It's the business. Anyway,
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00:08:36,320 --> 00:08:39,639
you can take that look off your
face cos I know what you're thinking.
156
00:08:39,640 --> 00:08:43,639
"It's all about Connor now."
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00:08:49,280 --> 00:08:53,279
Better to spend 200 on something and wear it
100 times, than 30 quid and only wear it once.
158
00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:57,519
Jamie, it's not every
day your first born's...
159
00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:04,039
Karen? Karen?!
160
00:09:09,360 --> 00:09:10,279
What is it, what's wrong?
161
00:09:10,280 --> 00:09:11,639
What is it, what's wrong?
What's going on?
162
00:09:11,640 --> 00:09:14,879
Karen!
163
00:09:14,880 --> 00:09:17,319
What is it?
What are you looking for?
164
00:09:17,320 --> 00:09:21,319
Karen. What's going on?
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00:09:22,120 --> 00:09:23,359
The baby.
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00:09:23,360 --> 00:09:25,559
Where is he?
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00:09:25,560 --> 00:09:29,559
When's the last time
you had him, Karen?!
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00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:33,999
Mum, get upstairs! Check, quick!
169
00:09:35,280 --> 00:09:39,279
Connor...
170
00:09:41,240 --> 00:09:45,239
Shane, Mickey! Connor's missing!
I'll check the shops,
171
00:09:45,440 --> 00:09:48,399
check the bus stop, tell
everyone you see he's missing!
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00:09:48,400 --> 00:09:52,399
Get Carl, Ian, fuckin' everyone!
Find him, Mickey!
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00:09:54,600 --> 00:09:57,639
Aw, come on!
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00:09:57,640 --> 00:10:01,199
Carl I need your...
175
00:10:01,200 --> 00:10:05,199
I need your help when you've...
finished.
176
00:10:16,840 --> 00:10:18,599
You stupid...
177
00:10:18,600 --> 00:10:20,399
Leave the girl alone!
178
00:10:20,400 --> 00:10:22,319
How the fuck do you forget
where you leave your own son?!
179
00:10:22,320 --> 00:10:26,319
Do you think she really
needs telling, Jamie?!
180
00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:30,879
BABY GURGLES
181
00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:32,159
Oh, thank God!
182
00:10:32,160 --> 00:10:33,199
Oh, Joe, thank fuck!
183
00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:35,879
Said she'd only be five minutes.
184
00:10:35,880 --> 00:10:38,279
Asked me to take him while
she popped into Yvonne's.
185
00:10:38,280 --> 00:10:39,799
Everyone was smoking in there.
186
00:10:39,800 --> 00:10:43,799
My mobile goes, I'm yapping away,
I turn around and she's gone.
187
00:10:45,080 --> 00:10:46,359
I forgot...
188
00:10:46,360 --> 00:10:48,079
I forgot.
189
00:10:48,080 --> 00:10:50,439
Be the excitement of
the christening and that.
190
00:10:50,440 --> 00:10:52,519
Ah, cheers, Joe.
191
00:10:52,520 --> 00:10:53,959
Drink?
192
00:10:53,960 --> 00:10:57,959
No, I'm driving. Thanks anyway.
Later, yeah?
193
00:10:59,160 --> 00:11:01,879
Delivery, mate.
194
00:11:01,880 --> 00:11:05,879
I'm sorry.
195
00:11:09,580 --> 00:11:11,139
I'm just off to pick up t'cake.
196
00:11:11,140 --> 00:11:15,139
Running errands for the bitch that's coming
between us. What sort of servile cretin are you?
197
00:11:15,620 --> 00:11:18,979
I'd like you to watch your mouth. And I'd
like you to keep your nose out of our business.
198
00:11:18,980 --> 00:11:20,059
She's not coming between us.
199
00:11:20,060 --> 00:11:23,819
She is. And she's doing it
by running me down.
200
00:11:23,820 --> 00:11:26,499
And you're no innocent bystander.
201
00:11:26,500 --> 00:11:29,019
You're her fuckin' accomplice!
202
00:11:29,020 --> 00:11:30,739
He's running a family errand.
203
00:11:30,740 --> 00:11:34,739
To fetch a cake for a baptism that
I should have been godmother at.
204
00:11:34,740 --> 00:11:35,739
She didn't mean anything personal.
205
00:11:35,740 --> 00:11:39,419
It's easy for you to say. You're
not the one who's been shafted.
206
00:11:39,420 --> 00:11:41,419
Do you want me to tell her
I can't be godfather no more?
207
00:11:41,420 --> 00:11:45,419
Do you want me to tell her I can't be godfather
no more? I want you to fight my corner!
208
00:11:50,900 --> 00:11:54,899
You've no idea, have you? The effect
this had on me, how touched I was,
209
00:11:54,900 --> 00:11:58,899
how it made me feel that Karen and Jamie thought
that I was good enough to be godmother to their son.
210
00:12:01,500 --> 00:12:03,739
I was walking on air!
211
00:12:03,740 --> 00:12:06,699
And I wanted to do it right,
212
00:12:06,700 --> 00:12:08,459
do Connor proud.
213
00:12:08,460 --> 00:12:12,379
Not just turn up, hold the kid by the
font and then get hammered at the do
214
00:12:12,380 --> 00:12:15,339
like every other godparent
I have ever come across!
215
00:12:15,340 --> 00:12:19,339
OK, you want it sorted?
I'll sort it.
216
00:12:26,620 --> 00:12:30,619
I didn't do it to hurt Kelly, son.
I did it to protect her.
217
00:12:30,860 --> 00:12:34,019
She probably can't bless herself
right, never mind reel off the Creed.
218
00:12:34,020 --> 00:12:36,499
I don't think I can any more.
219
00:12:36,500 --> 00:12:38,459
More the need for Concepta, then.
220
00:12:38,460 --> 00:12:41,699
She's blood. She'll always be around.
221
00:12:41,700 --> 00:12:45,699
I hate to say this, but what if Kelly
traps off with some loaded punter?
222
00:12:47,020 --> 00:12:51,019
Any one of us could fuck off
at any time. You and Dad split up.
223
00:12:51,380 --> 00:12:55,259
Yeah. But we've got responsibilities
that bind us forever more.
224
00:12:55,260 --> 00:12:58,059
Apart from the dollop of lust
and love, you two have nothin'.
225
00:12:58,060 --> 00:12:59,779
Apart from the dollop of lust and love, you two
have nothin'. What are you getting out of this?
226
00:12:59,780 --> 00:13:03,059
You've got loads of godkids you never
even see, so you know it's a load of shit.
227
00:13:03,060 --> 00:13:05,819
Your beloved
write those lines, did she?
228
00:13:05,820 --> 00:13:09,819
I've had enough of you and my dad trying to
run my life, trying to fuck things up for me.
229
00:13:12,500 --> 00:13:14,619
I'm not your little boy any more.
230
00:13:14,620 --> 00:13:17,939
And I'm telling you right now,
231
00:13:17,940 --> 00:13:21,939
back off.
232
00:13:25,820 --> 00:13:28,339
You OK now?
233
00:13:28,340 --> 00:13:32,339
Embarrassed, more than anything.
234
00:13:32,340 --> 00:13:33,339
I'm sorry.
235
00:13:33,340 --> 00:13:34,899
Yeah, so am I.
236
00:13:34,900 --> 00:13:38,179
My head's done in, with everything.
237
00:13:38,180 --> 00:13:39,779
Hey, just think.
238
00:13:39,780 --> 00:13:43,779
After the christening,
it's all over.
239
00:14:02,420 --> 00:14:04,459
No need to thank me.
240
00:14:04,460 --> 00:14:06,139
Fuck...off.
241
00:14:06,140 --> 00:14:10,139
Right, before I do, there's something
I'd like to get off me chest. Jamie, mate!
242
00:14:12,220 --> 00:14:15,419
Let's let Jamie in
on our little secret.
243
00:14:15,420 --> 00:14:18,299
Oh, cheer up, Karen.
Confession's good for the soul.
244
00:14:18,300 --> 00:14:19,539
He'll kill you.
245
00:14:19,540 --> 00:14:20,699
I'm ready for him this time.
246
00:14:20,700 --> 00:14:21,659
He won't believe you.
247
00:14:21,660 --> 00:14:25,659
He won't believe you. Oh, so he hasn't noticed the mole
between your tits or the birthmark on your left arse cheek?
248
00:14:27,140 --> 00:14:31,139
Or the way you dig your nails into
the back of his neck when you come?
249
00:14:32,500 --> 00:14:36,499
Something you should know.
250
00:14:38,620 --> 00:14:40,459
Your mam's invited me to Sunday's do.
251
00:14:40,460 --> 00:14:44,459
I've heard the delivery nurse is always at Maguire
christenings. Just checking that's cool with you.
252
00:14:45,020 --> 00:14:49,019
Yeah, well you've been there twice for
the little fella. How could I say no?
253
00:14:49,180 --> 00:14:50,459
See you later.
254
00:14:50,460 --> 00:14:54,459
Yeah.
255
00:15:10,380 --> 00:15:12,939
What's that?
256
00:15:12,940 --> 00:15:16,939
This is Back-Door Bertie.
Our mutual fuck buddy.
257
00:15:17,180 --> 00:15:20,659
Yeah, right.
Well, he can fuck off.
258
00:15:20,660 --> 00:15:23,779
I thought you wanted to indulge
in a little dark star penetration?
259
00:15:23,780 --> 00:15:27,779
I do, but... But that? There's no
pleasure for you sticking that in me.
260
00:15:29,460 --> 00:15:31,779
Well, maybe not,
but you might love it.
261
00:15:31,780 --> 00:15:33,899
An' I'm all about giving, me.
262
00:15:33,900 --> 00:15:37,899
Imagine, the pair of us casting
off our arse innocence together.
263
00:15:37,900 --> 00:15:41,899
What could be more romantic
and binding?
264
00:15:42,420 --> 00:15:46,419
I promise I'll be gentle, Carl.
265
00:15:50,460 --> 00:15:52,299
You're certainly in the minority.
266
00:15:52,300 --> 00:15:54,539
Bet hardly any straight blokes
take it.
267
00:15:54,540 --> 00:15:57,859
I dunno. What's the difference
between a straight man and a gay man?
268
00:15:57,860 --> 00:15:59,699
Six cans of lager.
269
00:15:59,700 --> 00:16:02,899
I'm not taking, I'm just...
Considering possibilities.
270
00:16:02,900 --> 00:16:05,619
If you're thinking it,
you're halfway there.
271
00:16:05,620 --> 00:16:08,699
Yeah, well, me and Max are tight.
And what's good for the goose...
272
00:16:08,700 --> 00:16:10,979
What advice would you give
your little brother, Ian?
273
00:16:10,980 --> 00:16:13,819
Absolutely fuckin' none.
I'm not talking bum sex with him!
274
00:16:13,820 --> 00:16:16,219
Be different
if it was pussy though.
275
00:16:16,220 --> 00:16:20,219
I tell you what, once you've made contact with Mr G
spot, you'll kill yourself for not hooking up sooner.
276
00:16:21,860 --> 00:16:23,139
Don't it hurt, though?
277
00:16:23,140 --> 00:16:26,419
Well, you can't do the full monty
straight off.
278
00:16:26,420 --> 00:16:27,099
You've got to work up to it.
279
00:16:27,100 --> 00:16:28,699
You've got to work up to it.
How?
280
00:16:28,700 --> 00:16:31,979
Well, start small
and plenty of lube.
281
00:16:31,980 --> 00:16:33,339
Lubrication.
282
00:16:33,340 --> 00:16:36,579
Bit of spit always does it for me
if I'm ever caught short.
283
00:16:36,580 --> 00:16:40,579
Just let your mind open up to the
possibilities and your arse'll follow.
284
00:16:40,860 --> 00:16:44,179
And you're a Catholic, yeah,
like me?
285
00:16:44,180 --> 00:16:47,419
So the guilt'll just add to
the sheer thrill of it all.
286
00:16:47,420 --> 00:16:51,419
So, to recap,
you start small, work your way up.
287
00:16:54,900 --> 00:16:58,899
(BARKS)
288
00:17:07,020 --> 00:17:10,019
I fucking hate dogs. Little
disease-spreading shit machines!
289
00:17:10,020 --> 00:17:11,379
Karen.
290
00:17:11,380 --> 00:17:15,379
You look tired. Come on.
291
00:17:19,300 --> 00:17:22,499
Living over a pub's hardly peaceful.
292
00:17:22,500 --> 00:17:26,499
And I know Mimi's decibel level
isn't always within legal limits.
293
00:17:27,900 --> 00:17:31,899
Here.
294
00:17:33,020 --> 00:17:34,579
My place.
295
00:17:34,580 --> 00:17:37,659
It can be your little oasis.
296
00:17:37,660 --> 00:17:40,579
I want to help, Karen.
297
00:17:40,580 --> 00:17:42,219
Let's face it,
298
00:17:42,220 --> 00:17:46,219
I'm the nearest thing you've got to a dad and
you're the nearest thing I've got to a daughter now.
299
00:18:40,220 --> 00:18:44,219
Shit!
300
00:18:52,700 --> 00:18:55,899
If that's my consolation prize,
you can stick it up your arse.
301
00:18:55,900 --> 00:18:59,699
I tried my best, Kel.
Just seems like she's not having it.
302
00:18:59,700 --> 00:19:01,819
She say why?
Yeah, the religion thing.
303
00:19:01,820 --> 00:19:05,819
You know and I know, the reason she gave me
the elbow is cos she can't stand a low-down.
304
00:19:08,860 --> 00:19:10,419
Me, being in the limelight.
305
00:19:10,420 --> 00:19:13,179
Don't think you've got
any fears there, Kelly.
306
00:19:13,180 --> 00:19:16,899
In the New Testament,
Matthew never condemns prostitution.
307
00:19:16,900 --> 00:19:20,899
Turning to the Old Testament,
in the book of Hosea, God says
308
00:19:21,580 --> 00:19:25,219
he'd never punish the daughters
of Israel for selling themselves.
309
00:19:25,220 --> 00:19:29,219
And besides, you're a masseuse.
310
00:19:36,380 --> 00:19:40,379
How could ya? If you didn't want him
wearing it, you could've just said.
311
00:19:40,940 --> 00:19:42,259
What's going on?
312
00:19:42,260 --> 00:19:44,339
Look what she did!
313
00:19:44,340 --> 00:19:48,339
Her, who I've treated
like me own daughter.
314
00:19:48,460 --> 00:19:49,619
I ironed it.
315
00:19:49,620 --> 00:19:52,779
Sorry, I didn't even notice.
316
00:19:52,780 --> 00:19:56,779
You didn't want Connor wearing it and
thought if you ruined it, he wouldn't have to!
317
00:19:56,820 --> 00:19:59,819
Mimi, I can assure you, I would
never do something like that.
318
00:19:59,820 --> 00:20:03,819
This was my grandmother's,
an' her mother before that.
319
00:20:05,020 --> 00:20:08,419
The names of my dead babies
are woven into it.
320
00:20:08,420 --> 00:20:12,419
It was an accident.
321
00:20:14,460 --> 00:20:17,659
DOOR SLAMS
322
00:20:17,660 --> 00:20:20,659
You don't believe me now? What sort
of a mad bitch do you think I am?
323
00:20:20,660 --> 00:20:21,859
I'm beginning to wonder.
324
00:20:21,860 --> 00:20:24,059
Right.
325
00:20:24,060 --> 00:20:25,339
I'll sort it.
326
00:20:25,340 --> 00:20:28,939
I'll fucking sort it!
327
00:20:28,940 --> 00:20:32,939
I will sort it!
328
00:20:35,580 --> 00:20:39,579
RIPS
329
00:20:41,660 --> 00:20:45,659
The mark's do-able, but the tear...
330
00:20:46,980 --> 00:20:49,979
But with it being crocheted,
we should be able to hide it nicely.
331
00:20:49,980 --> 00:20:51,459
Brilliant.
332
00:20:51,460 --> 00:20:55,459
Problem is, this is Irish crochet
and I only do the filet.
333
00:20:55,860 --> 00:20:58,619
But my sister-in-law Mary
is good at the Irish, mind.
334
00:20:58,620 --> 00:21:02,499
But the silk thread
don't come cheap.
335
00:21:02,500 --> 00:21:04,579
KNOCK ON DOOR
336
00:21:04,580 --> 00:21:06,499
Shit!
337
00:21:06,500 --> 00:21:07,339
Get me out of here!
338
00:21:07,340 --> 00:21:08,899
Get me out of here!
In there.
339
00:21:08,900 --> 00:21:12,259
Just a minute. >
340
00:21:12,260 --> 00:21:15,019
Hi, Mimi. Come in.
341
00:21:15,020 --> 00:21:16,379
What can I do for you, love?
342
00:21:16,380 --> 00:21:19,819
Well, I'm not here to have me clit
flicked. Need a word with Kelly.
343
00:21:19,820 --> 00:21:23,819
Oh, she's tied up just now.
344
00:21:24,620 --> 00:21:28,459
I've had a word with Paddy and Shane
and they had a thing or two to say.
345
00:21:28,460 --> 00:21:31,259
And I've decided to rethink
the whole godmother thing.
346
00:21:31,260 --> 00:21:34,899
Concepta's sound but, on balance,
I feel your case is stronger.
347
00:21:34,900 --> 00:21:36,139
What?
348
00:21:36,140 --> 00:21:40,139
You're more grounded. Even when she isn't
high, her head's still in the clouds.
349
00:21:40,180 --> 00:21:41,979
And you only live round the corner.
350
00:21:41,980 --> 00:21:45,819
If a crisis strikes, what good's she
propping up the Waldorf bar?
351
00:21:45,820 --> 00:21:49,819
An' despite having more male customers than
Burton's, I feel your heart's in the right place.
352
00:21:51,100 --> 00:21:53,499
You'll do for me.
353
00:21:53,500 --> 00:21:54,459
Deal?
354
00:21:54,460 --> 00:21:58,459
Deal.
355
00:21:59,260 --> 00:22:03,259
See ya.
356
00:22:12,620 --> 00:22:14,139
Get out.
357
00:22:14,140 --> 00:22:18,139
What sort of a welcome's that, eh?
358
00:22:35,180 --> 00:22:37,699
She once told me that her...
359
00:22:37,700 --> 00:22:41,699
..that her big dream was to go
skinny-dipping at night in Crete.
360
00:22:44,060 --> 00:22:48,059
I kept her messages on me mobile
so I can hear her voice.
361
00:23:01,060 --> 00:23:05,059
(SOBS)
362
00:23:25,700 --> 00:23:28,179
If there's yellow stuff in it,
it's not cancer.
363
00:23:28,180 --> 00:23:30,379
I put sweet corn in that pasta dish.
364
00:23:30,380 --> 00:23:33,459
I were trying out some brown-eye
action with a party blower.
365
00:23:33,460 --> 00:23:36,539
But when I took it out,
the nozzle got stuck.
366
00:23:36,540 --> 00:23:37,779
I can't get it out. Will you try?
367
00:23:37,780 --> 00:23:41,779
Ooooh! Sorry, Carl, anal extractions didn't
feature on my auxiliary training course.
368
00:23:43,900 --> 00:23:46,179
You don't need a qualification
to work out what's got to be done!
369
00:23:46,180 --> 00:23:48,379
No, but you do need equipment.
370
00:23:48,380 --> 00:23:51,539
Didn't fancy wasting me
whole Friday night in A&E,
371
00:23:51,540 --> 00:23:53,179
Whoa, we're not going there!
372
00:23:53,180 --> 00:23:57,179
They won't bat an eyelid. Had a vicar in
last week, he had a 12-inch candle up him.
373
00:23:57,700 --> 00:24:00,379
Said he fell backwards putting
up curtains! You're nowt special.
374
00:24:00,380 --> 00:24:03,259
Said he fell backwards putting up curtains!
You're nowt special. I'm not going, Max.
375
00:24:03,260 --> 00:24:03,819
PARTY BLOWER SQUEAKS
376
00:24:03,820 --> 00:24:07,819
What was that?
377
00:24:09,460 --> 00:24:12,099
Any bit of wind an' it goes off.
378
00:24:12,100 --> 00:24:15,299
It's like having
an internal mouth organ.
379
00:24:15,300 --> 00:24:19,299
Hey, Carl,
give us a tune before you go.
380
00:24:25,060 --> 00:24:29,059
How much was lifted?
381
00:24:33,900 --> 00:24:37,899
OK, OK. I'll be right with you.
382
00:24:51,420 --> 00:24:55,419
Just what I fucking need!
383
00:24:55,980 --> 00:24:59,979
FRONT DOOR CLOSES
384
00:25:11,060 --> 00:25:15,059
I love you.
385
00:25:17,700 --> 00:25:19,459
Don't fuck up!
386
00:25:19,460 --> 00:25:23,459
I won't.
387
00:25:28,180 --> 00:25:30,899
Who the fuck am I?
388
00:25:30,900 --> 00:25:33,219
Who the...fuck...am I?
389
00:25:33,220 --> 00:25:35,979
Mr Maguire, Mr Maguire!
390
00:25:35,980 --> 00:25:38,739
So why are you treating me like
Bill Gates or bloody Carnegie?
391
00:25:38,740 --> 00:25:42,179
You're a charity case all right,
but not one I'm supporting.
392
00:25:42,180 --> 00:25:46,179
So, where the fuck's my money?
393
00:25:50,380 --> 00:25:53,339
As it's small, a little
irrigation'll budge it.
394
00:25:53,340 --> 00:25:55,499
As me vac's being serviced anyway.
395
00:25:55,500 --> 00:25:57,619
Are you sure you know
what you're doing?
396
00:25:57,620 --> 00:26:00,339
Every other day
I do a rectal removal.
397
00:26:00,340 --> 00:26:04,339
I dislodge, I douche, I dab some
talc, and I return it to its wife.
398
00:26:04,460 --> 00:26:07,379
Come on, Carl. Drop 'em.
399
00:26:07,380 --> 00:26:08,459
Ready?
400
00:26:08,460 --> 00:26:12,459
SQUELCH
401
00:26:17,460 --> 00:26:19,059
Do I look stupid?
402
00:26:19,060 --> 00:26:21,699
He's out getting the rest now.
403
00:26:21,700 --> 00:26:23,499
There are some people in this world
404
00:26:23,500 --> 00:26:27,499
who learn their lessons well,
take on board advice, move on
405
00:26:27,500 --> 00:26:31,059
and have relatively happy lives.
And there are those that don't.
406
00:26:31,060 --> 00:26:32,619
You are obviously of the latter.
407
00:26:32,620 --> 00:26:34,339
Fuck you!
408
00:26:34,340 --> 00:26:36,779
You don't scare me!
I know people.
409
00:26:36,780 --> 00:26:39,619
And once you're out of intensive
care, you go see those people and
410
00:26:39,620 --> 00:26:41,259
ask them if they know Paddy Maguire!
411
00:26:41,260 --> 00:26:45,259
I guarantee they will.
412
00:26:45,940 --> 00:26:47,499
You've got...
413
00:26:47,500 --> 00:26:51,499
GUNSHOT
414
00:27:12,640 --> 00:27:13,759
How's my favourite bum boy?
415
00:27:13,760 --> 00:27:16,799
Last time I was slipping your
Chrissy one, she said he was fine.
416
00:27:16,800 --> 00:27:17,639
Paddy through there?
417
00:27:17,640 --> 00:27:19,119
No, I'll give him a bell.
418
00:27:19,120 --> 00:27:21,479
Been ringing him for ages,
just keeps ringing out.
419
00:27:21,480 --> 00:27:25,479
Yeah.
420
00:27:26,840 --> 00:27:30,839
Two minutes, yeah?
421
00:27:31,360 --> 00:27:32,359
Cheers, son.
422
00:27:32,360 --> 00:27:34,079
Is me dad here?
423
00:27:34,080 --> 00:27:35,159
Nipped out for the papers.
424
00:27:35,160 --> 00:27:39,159
On a Saturday morning there's nothing that Mr
Maguire and I like more than to talk current affairs
425
00:27:40,240 --> 00:27:41,439
over a pot of Lady Grey.
426
00:27:41,440 --> 00:27:42,879
Really?
427
00:27:42,880 --> 00:27:46,879
Is he fuck here.
428
00:27:49,920 --> 00:27:52,559
Sean's here with the
delivery and Dad's not in.
429
00:27:52,560 --> 00:27:53,639
You got three grand in the safe?
430
00:27:53,640 --> 00:27:55,879
Do I look like a man who's
got three grand in the safe?
431
00:27:55,880 --> 00:27:58,679
You can set your watch by Sean.
432
00:27:58,680 --> 00:28:01,279
Every Saturday at 12.
Dad never misses him.
433
00:28:01,280 --> 00:28:03,119
There's definitely something up.
434
00:28:03,120 --> 00:28:06,239
Pint of the darkstuff please,
Jamie.
435
00:28:06,240 --> 00:28:10,239
Three grand, me tips.
436
00:28:12,000 --> 00:28:13,039
Karen all right?
437
00:28:13,040 --> 00:28:15,279
Not every day you forget
where your kid is, eh?
438
00:28:15,280 --> 00:28:16,599
You weren't laughing the other day.
439
00:28:16,600 --> 00:28:19,839
Nah,she's fine.
440
00:28:19,840 --> 00:28:22,039
And that is on the house.
441
00:28:22,040 --> 00:28:24,199
Good, so long as
the baby blues haven't struck.
442
00:28:24,200 --> 00:28:25,719
She's just tired, that's all.
443
00:28:25,720 --> 00:28:27,519
We both are.
444
00:28:27,520 --> 00:28:31,079
Having a baby in the house
really takes it out of you.
445
00:28:31,080 --> 00:28:34,679
Mate of mine said that him and his missus
are that knackered at the end of the day,
446
00:28:34,680 --> 00:28:36,279
all they're fit for in bed is sleep.
447
00:28:36,280 --> 00:28:39,199
Your love life's out the window,
you're skint all the time,
448
00:28:39,200 --> 00:28:42,119
strain was unbelievable.
449
00:28:42,120 --> 00:28:43,639
Hey, but listen, he didn't have
450
00:28:43,640 --> 00:28:46,319
what you and Karen have got,
d'you know what I mean, mate?Jamie?
451
00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:50,319
Yes, mate.
452
00:28:50,600 --> 00:28:52,799
Here's the rascal.
You wanna keep it?
453
00:28:52,800 --> 00:28:53,279
Pass.
454
00:28:53,280 --> 00:28:56,399
Should have it framed. Once
it's been disinfected, obviously.
455
00:28:56,400 --> 00:28:58,879
Health freaks would pay hundreds
for this treatment.
456
00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:01,159
If you know any, tell
them I'll do it cheaper.
457
00:29:01,160 --> 00:29:02,159
Cheers, Lillian.
458
00:29:02,160 --> 00:29:06,159
It was all my pleasure.
459
00:29:09,640 --> 00:29:10,999
I underestimated you.
460
00:29:11,000 --> 00:29:12,039
How?
461
00:29:12,040 --> 00:29:16,039
Never thought for a second you'd ever
really consider being my bum chum.
462
00:29:19,720 --> 00:29:22,479
So, how can I make it up to you?
463
00:29:22,480 --> 00:29:26,199
You can have anything you like.
464
00:29:26,200 --> 00:29:30,199
(FARTS)
465
00:29:41,720 --> 00:29:45,079
(KNOCKS)
466
00:29:45,080 --> 00:29:49,079
You OK?
467
00:29:55,200 --> 00:29:57,279
We'll have to make a bit of
"us" time, won't we?
468
00:29:57,280 --> 00:30:01,279
We're more than just Mum and Dad.
469
00:30:03,280 --> 00:30:05,639
Let's have a night out, eh?
470
00:30:05,640 --> 00:30:07,759
Too much effort.
471
00:30:07,760 --> 00:30:11,679
By the time we've booked a table,
and found a sitter, done the feeds,
472
00:30:11,680 --> 00:30:15,599
got his clothes sorted for
the next day, got meself sorted,
473
00:30:15,600 --> 00:30:17,279
all I'm fit for is bed.
474
00:30:17,280 --> 00:30:21,279
Things'll get better, yeah?
475
00:30:25,960 --> 00:30:26,999
I'm sorry.
476
00:30:27,000 --> 00:30:30,519
I'm not complaining.
477
00:30:30,520 --> 00:30:34,519
You and Connor are my world now.
478
00:30:35,880 --> 00:30:39,839
If anything happened,
479
00:30:39,840 --> 00:30:43,839
if anything damaged us,
480
00:30:44,000 --> 00:30:47,999
I don't know what I'd do.
481
00:30:49,400 --> 00:30:53,359
Hey, nothing is gonna damage us.
482
00:30:53,360 --> 00:30:57,359
All right?
483
00:30:59,880 --> 00:31:02,159
Dad, it's Micky.
484
00:31:02,160 --> 00:31:06,159
Give us a bell, yeah?
485
00:31:07,920 --> 00:31:11,599
Peace offering.
You know where the bar is.
486
00:31:11,600 --> 00:31:14,479
I knew you said you'd sort it,
but I didn't fancy your odds.
487
00:31:14,480 --> 00:31:18,479
You know what, you lot probably
mock those South Sea islanders,
488
00:31:19,920 --> 00:31:23,199
with bones through their noses,
performing their shaman rituals.
489
00:31:23,200 --> 00:31:27,199
When, in fact, you are partaking
in exactly the same bollocks.
490
00:31:30,400 --> 00:31:33,639
About tomorrow, Frank,
a verbal invite, do ya?
491
00:31:33,640 --> 00:31:36,839
Be nice to see you there
for Katie's sake. Free bar.
492
00:31:36,840 --> 00:31:40,479
Oh, thanks Mimi, love, yeah
I'll try and show me face.
493
00:31:40,480 --> 00:31:44,479
But what I was about to say, is,
494
00:31:44,600 --> 00:31:48,599
that common myths bind us.
495
00:31:48,880 --> 00:31:51,279
Have either of you seen dad?
496
00:31:51,280 --> 00:31:52,719
Am I some kind of babysitter now?
497
00:31:52,720 --> 00:31:54,639
He's
big boy, he can look after himself.
498
00:31:54,640 --> 00:31:56,359
Help us look for him.
499
00:31:56,360 --> 00:31:57,959
Micky, you know your dad.
He'll be fine.
500
00:31:57,960 --> 00:32:01,959
Get yourself a drink, sit
yourself down and stop worrying.
501
00:32:02,720 --> 00:32:06,719
He won't thank you for it.
502
00:32:07,120 --> 00:32:09,159
What's up?
503
00:32:09,160 --> 00:32:12,999
Seriously, what's up?
504
00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:16,999
If he's as nice as you say he is
he won't mind helping, will he?
505
00:32:20,960 --> 00:32:23,039
Micky.
Long time no see.
506
00:32:23,040 --> 00:32:25,039
Ady.
507
00:32:25,040 --> 00:32:27,199
How are things with
you and the missus?
508
00:32:27,200 --> 00:32:31,199
It's all right, he's a fully paid up
member of the Uphill Shit Stabbers.
509
00:32:31,200 --> 00:32:35,199
It's over. I came home one day and found
herbang at it with the man next door.
510
00:32:35,240 --> 00:32:38,519
Didn't think that'd bother ya.
Not after what we got up to.
511
00:32:38,520 --> 00:32:40,199
And the man over the road
512
00:32:40,200 --> 00:32:42,999
and the man at the back
and the man from next door but one.
513
00:32:43,000 --> 00:32:44,199
So you've left, then?
514
00:32:44,200 --> 00:32:47,919
Yeah, I've been living with
an interior designer from Cambodia.
515
00:32:47,920 --> 00:32:50,879
Can't string a sentence together,
but the flat looks fantastic
516
00:32:50,880 --> 00:32:54,879
and the things he can do with a wok
have to be seen to be believed.
517
00:32:54,960 --> 00:32:57,999
You should come round one night,
both of you.
518
00:32:58,000 --> 00:33:00,959
I'm here about my dad.
He's missing.
519
00:33:00,960 --> 00:33:02,399
Well, how long?
520
00:33:02,400 --> 00:33:03,279
About 12 hours.
521
00:33:03,280 --> 00:33:05,679
12 hours, I've been on
benders longer than that!
522
00:33:05,680 --> 00:33:09,479
He's never done this before. Ady,
please, look, this isn't like him.
523
00:33:09,480 --> 00:33:13,479
Something's happened, I know it, and no
fucker'll believe me and you're my last hope.
524
00:33:14,120 --> 00:33:15,679
Please, Ady,
525
00:33:15,680 --> 00:33:17,879
you've gotta help us.
526
00:33:17,880 --> 00:33:19,559
Please...
527
00:33:19,560 --> 00:33:22,759
You're through to Paddy Maguire,
leave a message.
528
00:33:22,760 --> 00:33:26,279
Right and what should happen now is
the base station will flag up
529
00:33:26,280 --> 00:33:30,279
the phone's location. There we go.
There we go. Got ya!
530
00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:34,639
Dad it's me!Micky, Micky calm down.
Can you hear me?
531
00:33:34,640 --> 00:33:38,639
Paddy, Paddy.
I am going to radio for help.
532
00:33:43,280 --> 00:33:44,279
Thanks a million for finding him.
533
00:33:44,280 --> 00:33:45,919
That was down to Micky.
534
00:33:45,920 --> 00:33:49,919
He led the investigation.
535
00:33:53,360 --> 00:33:55,399
This is all down to me.
536
00:33:55,400 --> 00:33:57,839
Nah, it's not just you, Jamie.
537
00:33:57,840 --> 00:34:00,319
It's neither of you. No-one's fault.
538
00:34:00,320 --> 00:34:02,359
He knew the risks he was taking.
539
00:34:02,360 --> 00:34:05,679
He asked for our help
and we said no.
540
00:34:05,680 --> 00:34:09,679
We let him down, Mum.
All of us.
541
00:34:12,760 --> 00:34:16,759
Well, nearly all of us.
542
00:34:21,480 --> 00:34:23,559
Eating, sleeping.
543
00:34:23,560 --> 00:34:24,759
Right. Grub's up!
544
00:34:24,760 --> 00:34:26,959
You're pushing the boat out.
545
00:34:26,960 --> 00:34:29,159
Well, we won't get to eat till
the other side of the service so...
546
00:34:29,160 --> 00:34:33,159
There won't be a service.
547
00:34:34,800 --> 00:34:36,839
But this is Connor's big day.
548
00:34:36,840 --> 00:34:39,319
Yeah,
but not without my dad it isn't.
549
00:34:39,320 --> 00:34:43,319
We're cancelling.
Right, Mum?
550
00:34:44,720 --> 00:34:46,639
And how would we explain
that to wee Connor?
551
00:34:46,640 --> 00:34:50,639
All I need is a clean shirt
and I'll be with you.
552
00:35:19,240 --> 00:35:20,759
Patrick...
553
00:35:20,760 --> 00:35:24,759
it's time.
554
00:35:31,280 --> 00:35:33,359
You passed muster?
555
00:35:33,360 --> 00:35:36,679
Eventually.
556
00:35:36,680 --> 00:35:40,679
I believe in one God,
the Father, Almighty,
557
00:35:42,480 --> 00:35:46,479
maker of all things visible
and invisible.
558
00:35:51,080 --> 00:35:55,079
If you'd like to...
559
00:36:01,680 --> 00:36:05,679
I'm not sure if I can.
560
00:36:06,480 --> 00:36:10,239
It's just...
561
00:36:10,240 --> 00:36:12,439
I don't actually believe in God.
562
00:36:12,440 --> 00:36:16,439
But if I'm called on,
I'll teach him to respect people,
563
00:36:16,640 --> 00:36:20,639
no matter what they do or don't
believe in, as long as they're decent.
564
00:36:20,920 --> 00:36:24,919
And I'll pray to a God I'm not
sure exists that he's loved.
565
00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:29,959
I'm a prostitute, Father.
566
00:36:29,960 --> 00:36:33,919
Ex junkie.
But I know good from bad.
567
00:36:33,920 --> 00:36:37,919
And if I can teach him that,
it's job done, really. Isn't it?
568
00:36:42,720 --> 00:36:45,559
I'm sorry if I've offended.
569
00:36:45,560 --> 00:36:48,559
I just don't want
to let Connor down.
570
00:36:48,560 --> 00:36:52,559
Or meself.
571
00:37:04,920 --> 00:37:08,919
Here, someone thought they were
very clever phoning Concepta,
572
00:37:09,680 --> 00:37:13,559
putting on a voice, telling her
that her flight had been cancelled.
573
00:37:13,560 --> 00:37:17,559
Only the thick fucking prick of a
prankster forgot to withhold the number!
574
00:37:18,400 --> 00:37:22,399
Didn't you, Shane?!
575
00:37:29,720 --> 00:37:31,959
POP MUSIC PLAYS
576
00:37:31,960 --> 00:37:34,879
Word's been put out.
577
00:37:34,880 --> 00:37:38,879
Tell you what, whoever brings us
that kid is gonna be well flush.
578
00:37:39,600 --> 00:37:40,959
Who put the word out?
579
00:37:40,960 --> 00:37:43,719
Me, J, Shane.
580
00:37:43,720 --> 00:37:46,279
Well, you'd no fucking right.
I'm the director of Maguire Limited.
581
00:37:46,280 --> 00:37:49,199
I make the executive decisions.
582
00:37:49,200 --> 00:37:50,799
He's gonna pay for this, Dad.
583
00:37:50,800 --> 00:37:54,799
Risking your lives?
For what? For what?!
584
00:37:58,400 --> 00:38:01,679
No more of my cubs will die
on my account! Call it off.
585
00:38:01,680 --> 00:38:04,919
But he hurt you and they need to
know no-one does that to our old man.
586
00:38:04,920 --> 00:38:08,919
Are you fuckin' deaf? Call it off!
587
00:38:17,600 --> 00:38:20,119
Hey, sexy.
588
00:38:20,120 --> 00:38:23,839
What happened to that Long Wet
Spicy Screw?
589
00:38:23,840 --> 00:38:25,999
Was just savouring the thought.
590
00:38:26,000 --> 00:38:28,799
Are those limes ready yet, babe?
591
00:38:28,800 --> 00:38:32,799
Ahhh.
592
00:38:35,520 --> 00:38:39,519
Is he any lighter now
he's washed of mortal sin?
593
00:38:42,720 --> 00:38:44,799
Didn't you fancy
jumping in yourself,
594
00:38:44,800 --> 00:38:47,239
taking a spiritual cleanse?
595
00:38:47,240 --> 00:38:50,039
You can't just turn up
and get christened, Frank.
596
00:38:50,040 --> 00:38:52,799
There is a program.Program!
597
00:38:52,800 --> 00:38:55,039
But what would be the point, eh?
598
00:38:55,040 --> 00:38:58,639
You'd only blot your copy book
the next day.
599
00:38:58,640 --> 00:39:01,519
You're like me, you are.
600
00:39:01,520 --> 00:39:05,519
Lured by earthly pleasures.
601
00:39:16,000 --> 00:39:19,519
How could you speak to
Micky like that, in public?
602
00:39:19,520 --> 00:39:23,519
The only one who you wouldn't invite into the
business, but the only one who went out looking for you.
603
00:39:26,960 --> 00:39:30,959
Call yourself a father.
604
00:39:33,600 --> 00:39:37,599
Bang! Bang!
605
00:39:43,440 --> 00:39:46,639
I thought raspberries
were your favourite.
606
00:39:46,640 --> 00:39:48,799
Not when they're covered
in melted cow bone!
607
00:39:48,800 --> 00:39:52,799
The more I demanded,
the more she dug in!
608
00:39:53,680 --> 00:39:56,679
The call was a last resort.
609
00:39:56,680 --> 00:40:00,319
I just...I just
wanted to make it good.
610
00:40:00,320 --> 00:40:04,319
I want a man, Shane, a grown-up.
611
00:40:05,880 --> 00:40:09,879
But until I find one, suppose
I'll have to make do with you!
612
00:40:23,840 --> 00:40:26,879
Shit, I'm sorry!For fuck's sake!
613
00:40:26,880 --> 00:40:30,879
Why don't you go back to theloo
where you've come from,clean up?
614
00:40:34,280 --> 00:40:36,359
She's a slut.
615
00:40:36,360 --> 00:40:38,159
D'you know what?
616
00:40:38,160 --> 00:40:41,119
Paddy nearly died yesterday
and it woke me up to something.
617
00:40:41,120 --> 00:40:45,119
Life's too short. I'm not going to
waste my life waiting for you, Karen.
618
00:40:46,200 --> 00:40:50,199
You've got two men in your life.
Why can't I have two women?
619
00:40:54,080 --> 00:40:58,079
Look at that.
Looks like a platypus on safari.
620
00:41:02,040 --> 00:41:04,479
What the fuck did you just say?
621
00:41:04,480 --> 00:41:07,279
Nothing, Paddy.
A platypus on safari?!
622
00:41:07,280 --> 00:41:10,199
That's right,
run, you yellow-bellied gob-shite.
623
00:41:10,200 --> 00:41:14,199
Utter another word that's less than kind, and I'll
do what mother nature should've done 50 years ago.
624
00:41:15,800 --> 00:41:19,799
I'll erase you for good!
625
00:41:29,920 --> 00:41:33,919
Nice one, Dad.
How do you think she's feeling now?
626
00:41:35,720 --> 00:41:39,479
Listen.You know something, Paddy,
you make the china shop bull
627
00:41:39,480 --> 00:41:41,519
look socially deft.
628
00:41:41,520 --> 00:41:45,519
I was protecting my family,
like any good father should.
629
00:41:47,440 --> 00:41:51,439
Is that so contemptible?
630
00:41:53,480 --> 00:41:57,479
If you don't tell mewhat you want, I
can't help you. She's doing my head in.
631
00:41:57,520 --> 00:41:59,879
What's wrong with Katie now?
632
00:41:59,880 --> 00:42:03,879
The kiddies entertainer, the fella
you elbowed?With the broken nose?
633
00:42:03,960 --> 00:42:07,959
He won't be performing now.
634
00:42:12,720 --> 00:42:14,639
Once upon a time,
635
00:42:14,640 --> 00:42:18,639
there was a King
who lived in a mighty castle.
636
00:42:19,040 --> 00:42:23,039
He had all the things
a man could wish for.
637
00:42:23,080 --> 00:42:26,399
But he was a lonely King.
638
00:42:26,400 --> 00:42:30,399
That's right.
There was something missing.
639
00:42:31,240 --> 00:42:33,439
Are you with me so far?
640
00:42:33,440 --> 00:42:37,439
Then one day, he came
across a gorgeous young woman.
641
00:42:39,360 --> 00:42:43,359
And before too long,
they were madly, madly in love.
642
00:42:45,560 --> 00:42:49,559
And the gods blessed them
with beautiful children.
643
00:42:50,120 --> 00:42:54,119
And he and his Queen
loved them unconditionally.
644
00:42:55,320 --> 00:42:59,319
But the Queen grew bored
and looked to entertain herself.
645
00:43:00,280 --> 00:43:02,399
Live her own life.
646
00:43:02,400 --> 00:43:06,399
Without his family around him,
without their love, he floundered
647
00:43:07,520 --> 00:43:11,519
and he lost his crown.
648
00:43:12,480 --> 00:43:16,319
His daughter tried to...
649
00:43:16,320 --> 00:43:20,319
He lost his family
and he lost his Queen.
650
00:43:20,440 --> 00:43:24,439
He watched as his Queen
threw everything she had...
651
00:43:25,760 --> 00:43:27,319
they had...
652
00:43:27,320 --> 00:43:28,879
down the drain.
653
00:43:28,880 --> 00:43:32,279
She wanted him dead.
654
00:43:32,280 --> 00:43:36,279
Never thought that he might be in
need of some fucking assistance.
655
00:43:37,880 --> 00:43:41,159
Never thought that
he might be actually
656
00:43:41,160 --> 00:43:45,159
screaming out for some kind of help.
657
00:43:46,640 --> 00:43:49,359
All he was looking for
was someone...
658
00:43:49,360 --> 00:43:53,359
anyone...
659
00:43:54,360 --> 00:43:58,359
..to fucking listen!
660
00:44:03,000 --> 00:44:06,999
Just to fucking listen!
661
00:44:09,160 --> 00:44:13,159
That's all.
662
00:44:14,400 --> 00:44:18,399
That's all.
663
00:44:36,480 --> 00:44:38,359
Right,
664
00:44:38,360 --> 00:44:42,359
we're off to bed.
665
00:44:44,680 --> 00:44:48,679
Night, Mum.
666
00:44:49,920 --> 00:44:53,919
Night, Mimi.Night, Karen.
667
00:45:01,440 --> 00:45:04,319
We're gonna get off an' all.
668
00:45:04,320 --> 00:45:08,319
'Ghandi, Collins, yer woman
who wouldn't budge on the bus.
669
00:45:08,960 --> 00:45:10,599
'All heroes.
670
00:45:10,600 --> 00:45:14,599
'All freedom fighters.
671
00:45:17,800 --> 00:45:21,399
'Few will ever be known
for grand acts of courage like them.
672
00:45:21,400 --> 00:45:23,519
'But the taking of any liberty,
673
00:45:23,520 --> 00:45:27,519
'whether it's freeing yourself to love, or speaking
what your heart truly feels, now that takes balls.'
674
00:45:30,520 --> 00:45:34,519
Night. Pull the door to.
675
00:45:37,200 --> 00:45:41,199
'Breaking the shackles of mental
and emotional incarceration.
676
00:45:41,880 --> 00:45:45,879
'Only a big man manages that.'
677
00:45:56,320 --> 00:45:59,519
How do you know when things are
moving too fast? With a girl.
678
00:45:59,520 --> 00:46:01,239
Blimey.If you love her?
679
00:46:01,240 --> 00:46:04,919
Do you love her?She nicked
one of my pens.That's serious.
680
00:46:04,920 --> 00:46:08,919
Please.
Just a bit more time. Chesney, no!
681
00:46:10,160 --> 00:46:12,559
Plumber? Leak?
682
00:46:12,560 --> 00:46:16,319
That is our plumber. 100 quid and
he'll hold your hand in Pizza Express.
683
00:46:16,320 --> 00:46:17,919
What the fuck are you up to?
684
00:46:17,920 --> 00:46:21,879
I'd be all right if you
could choose how you go.
685
00:46:21,880 --> 00:46:23,519
You're not going to die.
686
00:46:23,520 --> 00:46:27,519
What about your father?He was
a doctor.Family of medics, eh?
687
00:47:07,160 --> 00:47:09,679
So you've converted to Judaism,
688
00:47:09,680 --> 00:47:13,399
but you're having violent cravings
for pork scratchings?God, yeah.
689
00:47:13,400 --> 00:47:17,399
I'll see what I can do.
690
00:47:17,400 --> 00:47:27,400
www.addic7ed.com
691
00:47:27,450 --> 00:47:32,000
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