All language subtitles for Portlandia s02e04 rover.eng

Oh, Muddy Waters.
I should get a Muddy Waters album, right?

Yeah, just get a "Best of."
Doesn't matter.

I feel guilty, though.

- Hey, guys.
- Eleanor, what's up?

Hey, um... you guys should
totally come to my DJ Night.

I'm spinning, like,
all psychedelic sort of stuff.

- You know, the Zombies, the Kinks.
- Wow. All right.

I didn't know you DJ'd.
I mean, I just started...

We have a dinner thing with my mom,
but we'll try to make it right after.

- Ok, cool.
- We'll make it.

Yeah. Cool.
Awesome.

- Thanks, guys.
- See you soon.

- DJ Night?
- I know. Eleanor? Whatever...

Ok, I'm all done
with your deposit.

- Is there anything else I can help
you guys with? - Nope, that's it.

If you guys aren't doing
anything tonight...

Uh, is this my receipt?

Uh, no. I'm spinning
tonight at 9:00.

I play rockabilly,
hillbilly, and psychobilly.

- You're playing tonight?
- Spinning.

- Ok. - So if you guys can
come, that'd be great.

- We'll check it out if we can.
- Promise?

- We'll try to make it.
- Yeah.

Please try.

They let you promote
your thing here?

Yeah, they don't really know.

All right, thanks.

All right. Thanks, guys.
See you tonight.

That looks good.
Do you have any samples?

My God, yum.

That's amazing.

Excuse me. Did you guys
want to come to my DJ Night?

- What?
- A DJ night?

- Fred, Carrie...
- Oh, God.

- Doing a DJ thing.
- Oh, no.

- 9:00.
- That guy's the worst.

- It's at 9:00. If you get there
early, drinks are free. - Yeah. What?

I play music. You know,
reggaeton, salsa, hip-hop.

Let's get out of here.
Run, run.

This is getting really weird, right?
What's going on?

[Music playing]

- Get out of here. Get out.
Get out of here. - Are these flyers?

DJ, DJ, DJ.

Go. Go. Go. Aah!

Where'd that guy go?
Go. Go, drive.

Aah!

Aah!

[Both screaming]

Oh, hey.

- What do we do?
- Take him out.

Aah!

[Both screaming]

And then we stopped screaming,
and we drove right here.

Well, darling, that's horrible.

What a terrible day you had.

Mom, I don't know
what's going on.

- Everybody in Portland's turning
into a DJ. - Oh, that's terrible.

I hope you don't mind, but I think
we're just going to just go to sleep.

You can't tonight.
Tonight is my DJ night.

[Distorted] No-o-o-o!

[Distorted crying]

Oh, my god, we made it.

Fred.

Hey. Fred, not you, too?
Fred?

No, no, no. I'm just
checking my messages.

Oh. Ha ha ha.

[Rumbling]

- Wait. Do you feel that?
- Yeah.

- Are we moving?
- What is that?

Carrie: I don't know.

[Distorted music playing]

[Theme music playing]

Sync and corrections by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com

So, today's a pretty big day,

'cause what we need to
talk about is preschool.

You have to kind of plan out
what-what it's gonna be to you.

What you do in preschool--
that's gonna determine

what you do in
elementary school.

Now, I know, you know,
it sounds like a lot of talk,

and we're just talking a lot,

but instead, we want to show you
what we're thinking.

So, look what mom and dad made.

We made a pretty cool chart
for you, and here you are.

By the way, we've
trademarked your name.

So while you're eating your granola
and milk, you know, in your bowl,

have a couple coffees
and a banana,

um, we can kind of
go through this.

So, Shooting Star
Preschool--

this is where we start.

Now look-look how--
this is a good growth point,

and we're going up from here.

You learn, and we're going up.

If you're worried about this-
this slow decline right here,

that's just when your voice is
changing and stuff like that.

You're getting acne.

Yeah, these columns represent
the Ivy League university

that will be achieved if we
can get into this preschool.

Grover, what's something
that you would want to buy

if you had a lot of money?

A what? A Ferrar what?

Ri. A Ferrari.

If this isn't going to
make sense to you,

- well, unfortunately...
- This might.

The last thing I want
is you out there, you know,

- shooting squirrels
and birds for dinner. - Yeah.

If we don't get you into that
Shooting Star private preschool,

you're going to end up
at a public school.

- It looks like a factory.
- With a bunch of riffraff.

You're walking into school and
you see all these dirty kids,

and it's like, they're gonna be
all dirty, like, all around here.

Mm-hmm.

They'll come up to you
and, like,

"Would you like to follow me to
have some chocolate that we stole?"

And by the way, we don't want
to judge anyone. Never judge.

So, community college.

My sister went to
community college,

and we haven't talked
in 10 years.

And she's dumb as hell.

You know how you can tell
a community-college kid?

It's when they're in their car, and they're
just sitting there in some garbage-y car,

and they're just like...

- This is not fun. We don't--let's...
- Let's just...

We don't want that.
We want...

- You like this chart
better, right? - Yeah.

- We do, too.
- This is a better one. We do, too.

And it all starts at preschool.

So we are gonna get you
into preschool,

we're gonna get you
into college,

we're gonna get you some money,

and we're gonna get you
whatever you want.

Just so we know you got it,
can you just repeat back

everything we just said?

- Ok.
- We'll do it again.

Ok.

- Preschool.
- Ok, Grover, TM.

Wow, a lot of dogs.

It's the right place.

Wow.

- Hi, everybody.
- Hi.

- I'm Dave.
- I'm Cass.

This is Quicksilver.

He was rescued from a tsunami,

so he's still dealing with
some trauma,

so if you guys could keep
your voice down

when you say the word "water,"
anything like that,

- if you could just whisper that.
- Hey, everyone.

We're thinking Quicksilver's
area is here.

Yeah. We're just gonna
go ahead and mark it off.

We'll allot this for Quicky.

- Thanks for respecting that.
- Yep.

I'm sorry, you're in our zone.

This is our ball
that we bought, ok,

and it's not a share ball.

Oh, look.
You guys see that?

Who bit this ball?
I don't know-- Is this yours?

You-- Is this your dog?
Whose are those two?

- You?
- Dogs love Dave.

They really love me.
Look at this.

- I think he's starting to chase me.
- Who is?

- I think they all are. I'm done playing.
- We need to cut you off.

- Wow, look at him go. He's having
such a good time. - Dave, we did it.

- I want to take a picture. - Something
we can frame and put over the bed.

Yeah. Aw, that's great, Cass.

That's great. Hey, the barking.
I don't need it.

Can you slow down on that pour?

I don't know if you heard,
but our dog survived a tsunami.

Have you lived through
a tsunami or a flood?

- I've never...
- Can I show you a trick? Here.

This is what we do at home.

[Dog barks]

What? I mean, we read books
about how to raise dogs.

We're interested
in doing it correctly.

OK, we rented quite a few DVDs

and returned them on time
because we saw them all.

- Cass...
- Yeah, Dave.

That dog will not stop staring at me.
He's up to something.

Whose dog is that with the lips
that are falling off?

Stay still.
No sudden movements at all.

He's gonna do something.
We've got to get out of here quickly.

That's a really good idea.

You understand?
But just no movements

that make it seem like
we're leaving.

Make it seem like we're
playing in the park,

looking around.
Go, go, go.

Oh, my god. We got to
get out of here.

Hey, where are you guys going?

- What? - That is my dog.
You're leaving with my dog.

- This dog?
- This is your dog right here.

Oh, they all look alike.
These dogs look alike.

Can you take care of him?
And here's yours back.

OK, thanks.
Have a great day.

Smells like dog poop
around here, doesn't it?

Oh, that's my cologne.

Rick speaking.
How may I help you?

Hey. I just sold my car,
and I can't find my title.

Uh, that would be
Jerry in titles.

- One moment, please.
- Ok.

Jerry. Jerry.

- Jerry. - He went to lunch.
He'll be back in an hour.

He'll be right with you
in one moment. Thank you.

[Muzak playing]

[Music plays over speaker]

Where do you want to get lunch?

♪ Let's try... ♪

[Shredder running]
♪ Tomato soup ♪

[Noise filtering through]
♪ Tomato soup ♪

♪ We'll order in
from the diner ♪

♪ Forgot to buy
a little bit of gasoline ♪

♪ On the way here ♪

[Both singing gibberish]

Man: Hello?

- Hello?
- Just a moment.

Jerry's gonna be back
really soon.

[Scatting]

Man, V.O.: "Thank you
for submitting a request

"for a replacement title
with the Oregon DMV."

Unfortunately, we are unable
to process your request at this time.

While you are waiting, please
enjoy the enclosed compact disc

of our sponsored music
dial tones, "Please Press 1.""

♪ Ah-ee-ahh-ee-ahh-ee-ahh ♪

OK, great.

So what's your favorite color?

Tres guts.

Turquoise?
That's a great color.

Honey, thank you
for talking with me, ok?

All right, I will
see you later, alligator.

You want to go to mom and dad?
What a good girl.

Thank you, guys. You can
expect to hear from the school

around the first week of August
only because there's so many kids

- and only so many spots.
- How are you?

- Grover?
- That's right.

- Hi. I'm Jana.
- Hi. Michelle.

- Hi, Michelle. Nice to meet you. Mom
and dad right there. - Nice to meet you too.

Ok, Grover. So I'm gonna ask you
some fun questions, ok?

Does that sound like
a good idea? Oh, thank you.

What is that?

You know what?
[Mutters]

You know what, honey? We don't have
any equipment to play this on, so...

- Coming through. Here you go. - Here's
that equipment you were asking for.

Ok. You know, I...

Stay tuned to...

Well, you know what?
If it doesn't work, we'll just--

- I think I'll watch it
another-- Ok. - It'll work.

[Soundtrack playing]

It was funny. The other day,
he said, "It's interesting.

Whenever you drive, your mind seems
like you're lost in thought.

"I think we're alike
that way."

And I'm, like, "Wow, that's
a really good way to put it.

You know, you're 4 years old,"
and he kind of looked up and smiled,

and he said, "I mean,
we're all kind of 4."

Hi. My name is Grover.
Let me in your school.

Yeah, he's just always been
a really amazing kid.

His first word, he was
starting to say, "Da. Da."

And we thought,
"Here it comes, "dad."

He actually said "data list,"
and that was his first word,

and he went on to teach us
about the Icarus myth,

which is something I hadn't
thought about a lot since school.

Who? Grover. Yeah.

He's musical.

Yeah, so I can see that, you know,
it's a good idea. Ok. Ahem.

What a great kid.
His favorite color is red.

Over the years, as they went,
he became bigger inside,

and it was really
something to watch.

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

Bravo.

Great.
What do you think?

Yeah. Whoo.

- Do you have any more questions?
- Oh, I don't have--

I think that answered
everything for me.

And, Grover, do you have anything
that you would like to add to that?

- That's on the commentary
and stuff.- Yep, extras.

Ok. Thank you, guys,
very much. I will see you--

The school has a lot of
submissions to sift through,

so they'll get in touch
with you first part of August.

Michelle:
Ok, keep us posted.

I mean, you guys have,
like, 45 cents?

- You have a dollar?
- Cool. Hey, peace out.

Hi. Money for us, please?
Do you have a dollar for bus money?

- Hi. Do you have 60 cents for ice cream?
- Yeah, take care.

- Have you noticed that
no one's giving us any money? - Yeah.

- We got to figure something
out. - Hey, uh, cute dog.

Wait a minute.
I have an idea.

Yes, our dog's trying to get to Eugene.
Do you have any money?

- Oh, that's great. Thank you
very much. Thank you. - Thank you so much.

You guys seen a dog before?
Have any change for him?

- Thank you so much.
- Thank you very much.

- Oh, this is amazing.
- This is pretty great.

Hey, good boy.

Now that we've had Bean,

we've actually made more
per every hour.

I have an idea.

Did you hear what I said?
I said, I have an idea.

Hi. Spare change? We have a puppy.
Thank you so much.

- Thank you. Hi.
- Hi.

Do you have $2.00?
[Chuckles]

This is going so great.

Hey...
I have another i--

Hey, thank you.
Whoa, multiple dollars.

- Thank you very much.
- Whoa, thank you.

Thank you.
Don't put the money in the fishbowl.

Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you very much.
Appreciate it, thank you.

Thanks a lot.
Thank you.

Whoa.

Thank you.

[Laughs]

Wow.

Oh, yeah. Thank you.
Take care.

Whoa, 2 million dollars.
I have an idea.

I'm so excited about
the scavenger hunt.

We just have to wait
for my friend Garmin.

- Which one's Garmin?
- You guys know him.

He's always around town.
He goes to shows a lot.

He's usually, like--I mean,
he's way in the front.

Kind of a little guy.
Oh, there he is.

- Hi, Garmin.
- Hey...

- How's it going?
- Great.

Sorry I'm late.
My door knob was stuck.

- It was stuck in there for a while.
- Oh, yeah, no worries.

- This is Megan and Ryan. - You guys
look great. Sergeant Pepper's, huh?

- Yeah. I think these are great uniforms.
- We're gonna win, guys.

We should probably go.

I should warn you that there's
not a lot of room in my car.

I've got my massage table in there
and things are a little crowded.

I'll go in the back.
I could fit. You know...

I'm a little guy.
My hands are little.

My features are small.
My shoulders slope down. I'm a little guy.

Great.
Ok, well, let's go.

Great.

Ah, there's the other team.
We're gonna be late.

Hurry, Garmin.

All right, "'O' is for
Canada's national anthem.

And "O" is for Oh, how I
love maple syrup and bacon.

"O" is like a doughnut."
It's Voodoo Doughnut.

They're famous for their
bacon maple bar. Let's go.

Ok, the clue's gonna be
in the doughnut.

Do we have to eat all of them?

You know what?
I could do it.

I can eat lots and lots, and I won't gain a pound.
I got lots of energy.

I'm a little guy.
Go for it, Garmin.

Wait. In doody doughnut.
Eat the doody doughnut.

"Go park yourself on cooch
and take the tunnel there."

- There's a tunnel on the playground.
- Yes. Let's go. Hurry.

Oh, wait.
That must be the tunnel.

- Ok, it's kind of small.
- I can go in.

You know, I'm a little guy.
My hands are little.

My features are small.
My shoulders slope down.

- You know, I'm a little guy.
- Great. Go for it. Hurry.

Hey. Are you lost?
Where's your mommy and daddy?

No. This happens all the time.
I'm a full-grown man. Just a little smaller.

Oh, yeah. Ok.

You got it? Yes.
Good boy, Garmin.

Ok, what does it say?

So hard to open these ribbons.
My fingers are kind of stubby.

"What the buck?
Your deer team's getting burned.

- It better hoof it."
- That's Burnside.

- Oh, right.
- It's a deer.

- It's the Main Oregon sign.
- The big neon one.

Oh, look, the pilgrims.
Let's go. Go.

Oh, no! We're not gonna win.
They're getting away.

We were so close.
It's right there.

Wait a minute.
I have an idea.

- Where's he going?
- I don't know. Garmin?

Garmin, what are you doing?

- Watch.
- Garmin.

- Garmin?
- I don't weigh that much.

He's gonna make it up there.

I see it. Hold on.

Go.

You guys, we got it. We won.

Good job, Garmin.

I don't know how to come down.

We can't understand.

Guess I'm just a little guy.

There he goes.

My hands are little.
My features are small.

You know, I'm a little guy.
Look at my sneakers.

They're a size 4. Hee hee.

Which one?

Ok.

Hey, everybody.
The mail came.

Oh, my god.

We got a letter
from the preschool.

Ok, if it doesn't happen,
it's fine.

It's fine.
It doesn't matter.

Either way, we're gonna be
proud of you.

"Congratulations. We are pleased to
welcome Grover to our Fall preschool..."

We did it.
Yay, we did it.

Grover, we're in.
We're in, we're in.

Oh, my god, I am so excited.

- Amazing. You are amazing.
- You did it.

I love the way you edited that.

- We have such an amazing kid.
- He's so smart.

There's gonna be paint
over your lips.

You're the best dad.

Me? You talking to me?
I am?

Come get me.
Come get me.

- Aw, yeah.
- Oh.

Yeah. Yeah.

[Michelle moans]

[Banging] Aw, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, yeah.

[Hums]

Hey, what are you
doing here, Grovy?

[Michelle yelling
and screaming]

[Continues humming]

One minute.

[Michelle moans and groans]

Brendan: Yeah! Yeah!

Hey, Grover.

[Brendan moans and groans]

Mm.

[Coughs] All right, have fun.

Brendan: Hyah!

[Michelle yelps and moans]

So, Grover, how do you feel

about having
a little baby brother?

- What do you think?
- Fine.

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Said I won't stop believing ♪

♪ Believing, believing ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ I won't stop believing ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Yeah, everyday,
another struggle, right? ♪

♪ Nah ♪

♪ Just a page
in your book of life ♪

♪ Strive to be the best
that you'll be, a'ight? ♪

♪ 'Cause, yo ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

Sync and corrections by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com

Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0