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If I'm lying, I'm crying.
Mater, are you all right?
Oh, shoot, that was nothing. I used to be a daredevil.
-What? -That's right.
Folks would come from all around to see my stunts.
Mater! Mater!
Ladies and gentlecars, Mater the Greater!
Get your Mater teeth right here! Two buck teeth for one buck!
You're a hero, man!
And there he goes!
Excuse me. Pardon me. Coming through. Good to see you.
My bad. Hey, Ricky, how's the kid? Watch your hood!
He did it!
-Mater is greater! -You're the car!
l did all kinds of stunts.
Fire!
I busted nearly every part in my body.
But the biggest stunt Mater the Greater ever did
was jumping Carburetor Canyon.
Jumping Carburetor Canyon? No way.
Yes way, you remember. You was there, too.
What?
-Ready, buddy? -Ready?
All right then, get 'er done!
Well, what happened?
You didn't make it.
Well, see you later! Come on, guys, let's go!
If I'm lying, I'm crying. Gotta go.
Hey, Red.
-I used to be a fire truck. -What?
Dad gum right.
Fire! Someone call Rescue Squad Mater!
All units, all units! Please respond.
Fire in progress at one-two-zero-niner Car Michael Way.
That's the old Gasoline and Match Factory!
Right you are, Mater. Now go!
Chopper One en route.
-Trooper responding. Where's Mater? -Right behind you!
Mater One en route.
All right, back it up, folks.
Put it in reverse, pal. Make room for Mater.
Be advised, explosive situation.
Rescue Squad Mater, we're counting on you!
1 0-4! I'm on it.
Mater, I cannot believe that you were a fire truck.
You remember, for Pete's sake. You was there, too!
-Help! Help! -Remain calm!
-I gotcha! -Look out, it's gonna blow!
Get him to the hospital! Stat! He's overheating.
On my way!
Yeah, baby!
Paging Dr Mater. Dr Mater to the OR.
What's going on, ladies?
All righty now, let's have us a little look-see.
Mater, you're a doctor, too?
That's right, buddy. I got my MD, my PhD, my STP, and my GTO.
Hey, Doctor.
Clear!
-Well, what happened? -I saved your life.
What? No, you didn't.
-Did so. -Did not.
-Did so. -No, Mater...
-Yes, I did. Yep. -Mater, stop it!
-Did so. -Not! Did not.
Hello, Doctor.
Did so.
Don't lie, don't cry! Wrastle!
Check out the size of that monster truck.
Shoot, that boy's nothing.
I used to wrastle trucks bigger than that.
-What? -Yep.
I used to be a Monster Truck Wrastler!
Ladies and gentlecars,
introducing The Tormentor!
Excuse me, it's Tow Mater!
Who wants some ice cream?
The I-Screamer!
I'm gonna make you scream!
-Where did he go? -Excuse me, mister.
Can I have one double dip dipstick sundae, please?
Sure. That's a very popular flavour.
One, two, three. The winner!
Now that's a sundae, sundae, sundae!
-Drop and give me 20! -I'll give you three.
One, two, three. The winner!
The Rastacarian has The Tormentor in his signature dread lock.
Me be jamming now, man.
One, two, three. The winner!
Who be jamming, now?
You be jamming, now!
Dr Feel Bad.
Your next stop is the hospital!
Don't worry, I'll bring you some flowers!
That's gotta hurt.
And just wait till he gets the bill.
One, two, three!
Paddy O'Concrete's gonna lay some cement.
Here comes a nice fresh pour!
Pour it on!
He got paved!
Now that's what I call a patio,
-daddy-o. -One, two, three!
You rock, man!
And now, the moment we've all been waiting for,
the buck-toothed wonder of the world, the wrastler of disaster,
The Tormentor!
Go get him, Tormentor!
And the world champion, Dr Frankenwagon.
Piece of cake.
And his Monster!
It's alive!
I'm dead.
What did you do?
Don't you remember nothing? We was a tag team.
-Tag, you're it! -What?
Yes, ladies, they are real. You wanna kick 'em?
-Quick! Tag me, tag me! -Tag.
Gotcha!
Watch this.
One, two, three.
The winners! The Tormentor and...
-What's your name, son? -Lightning McQueen.
And Frightening McMean!
Frightening McMean. Oh, please.
I can't believe it! The Tormentor!
I'm your biggest fan, man! Can I get your autograph?
-Well, of course you can. -I will never wash this door again.
Wait, don't you want Frightening McMean's autograph?
-No, thanks. -Seriously.
-I'm okay, really. -I'll do it real quick.
You're making me uncomfortable!
-Tag, you're it. -Tag, you're it.
-Tag. Tag! -Tag. Tag!
-Tag, you're it. Tag! -Tag!
If I'm lying, I'm crying.
-Hey, look! A UFO. -Mater, that was a hub cap.
No, it was a UFO.
And I know 'cause I done seen one once.
-What? -Yep, it was a crystal clear night.
Well, that's weird.
What... What in the...
Well, hey there. Welcome to Earth. My name is Mater.
-My name is Mator. -Mator?
-Should I take you to my litre? -Your litre.
All right, then! Well, here's all my litres.
Man, that guy could put it away.
-Dad gum! -Dad gum!
We did all my favourite things.
I taught him how to drive backwards.
And he taught me how to fly.
Cool.
Wait up!
Hey, Filmore!
We're going to be best friends forever.
What?
-I got him. -No!
-Return to base. -Mator!
I'll save you!
Dad gum reverse.
I'm coming to get you, Mator!
Oh, no. Mator!
Maintenance to the loading dock, please.
Van, we'll meet you up there, come on!
Get me 1 0 men right here, on the double!
Private Smithers, come here right now!
Dr Schleppenwagen, report to Hangar 10.
Don't get too close.
-Everybody, say, "Cheese." -Cheese!
-Dad gum. -Dad gum? He's trying to communicate.
-Where is Dr Abschleppwagen? -Here I am.
So Herr Doktor, what does dad gum mean?
The dad gum means... Let's get out of here!
Dad gum.
Follow me, Mator!
Do you really expect me to believe that?
Well, you should. You was there, too!
It's beautiful!
Dad gum.
Thanks for saving us, Mrs UFO. You think you can drop us off at home?
Thank you.
I'm sorry, Mater, that did not happen.
Oh, yeah? Then how come I can do this?
Oh, Mater, please!
Far out.
If I'm lying, I'm crying.
Hey, look, bulldozers.
Yep. Them's just like the ones I used to fight.
-What? -That's right.
I was a famous bulldozer fighter in Spain.
They called me El Materdor.
Seลor Materdor!
He's alive!
-El Materdor! -El Materdor!
Bravo, Seลor Mater!
So there I was, surrounded. Bulldozers all around me.
-What did you do? -What did I...
Well, don't you remember? You was there, too!
What?
They sure liked that fancy red paintjob of yours.
Mater, that did not happen.
Well, try telling that to them there bulldozers.
-Seลor Mater! -Seลor Mater!
Senoritas!
Houston, if I'm lying, I'm crying.
Wow, check out that moon.
-Yep, I been up there. -You have not.
Oh, yeah, it's real purty?.
It all started when I was towing this car to Florida.
And then suddenly, Houston had a problem!
Houston, I have a problem.
It's Impala XIII!
-He's stuck on the moon. -He needs a tow.
Where on Earth are we gonna get a tow?
Well, that guy's got a tow.
And with a little bit of training, I became a genuine auto-naut.
What's going on, ladies?
-Good luck, Mater. -The world's counting on you!
Welcome aboard, Mater. My name's Roger.
Well, howdy there, Roger.
Prepare for takeoff.
Let's burn this candle!
T-minus ten,
-nine... Main engine start. Seven, six... -Oh, boy! I've never been
-to the moon before, Roger. -...five...
-You'll love it. It's real nice. -...four, three, two, one.
Booster ignition.
And we have lift-off of Roger Shuttle on Impala XIII rescue mission.
I love my job!
We have cleared the tower.
It's all up to Mater, now.
Booster rockets 1 and 2 disengaged.
Roger, Roger. You are clear to burn.
See you later, Earth.
You are on approach to the moon.
Prepare for moon landing.
Open cargo bay doors.
Roger!
Operation Tow Mater is go.
Okey-dokey.
Good luck, Mater. See you back on Earth.
Roger-dodger, Roger.
Whoa!
Moon Mater has landed.
Thank goodness you're here, Mater.
Quick, connect your rescue apparatus to the frontal structural component
of the linear axle assembly. Pronto.
How about I just give you a tow?
Mission accomplished. Now, take us home. Rotate thrusters.
-Got it! Check. -Prime ignition.
-Pivot bolster columns. -What?
Disengage inertial dampener. Ignite propulsion system.
-Blast off! -Whoa!
Well, there l was, doing 17,000 miles an hour.
1 7,000 miles an hour? No way!
Yes way. But that was nothing compared to you.
Oh, yeah! This is awesome!
-Watch out for re-entry! -What?
Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot!
Don't worry, I got you.
Yes siree! We was a couple of bona fide heroes.
So, Mater, when does an astronaut eat?
At launch time.
-Oh, come on. That did not happen. -Well, suit yourself.
-Mater! Houston has another problem! -Roger, Roger!
Let's burn this candle!
Oh, yeah!
If I'm lying, I'm crying.
Mater, why don't you get up there and sing?
-Nah, I don't want to steal the show. -Steal the show?
-Well, I was a big rock star. -What?
Yes, siree. I started out in a garage band.
Boy, we sound pretty good. Let's get a gig.
Don't forget to tip the waitresses!
-That so rocked! -I know!
-Do you guys have a record? -Do you guys have a record?
Be right back.
Oh, yeah!
What's that sound?
That sounds like angels printing money to me.
Say, you boys are good. All you need is a new name.
A new name? A new name.
Delivery! Where do you want this heavy metal, Mater?
That's it!
I wanna hear you.
-You were Heavy Metal Mater? -No. We was Heavy Metal Mater.
-Are you ready to rock? -Yeah!
Oh, yeah!
I'm sorry, Mater. That did not happen.
Well, suit yourself.
If I'm lying, I'm crying, see.
Morning, Flo. Hey, can I get some air? My tyres are going flat.
Flat tyres, you say? I thought I done solved that crime.
-What? -I was a private eye.
-No way! -Yes way.
It was 7:1 5 on a Friday night.
I was working downtown. Mostly small jobs,
but this time I was onto something real big.
It was all right there in black and white.
Blowouts everywhere. There was some kind of counterfeit tyre ring.
And a sale on trailer hitches down at Rusty Rod's.
l was about to hit the bricks, and then she drove in.
She was wearing those whitewalls, the ones that used to drive me crazy.
-Hello, Mater. -What are you doing here, Tia?
-I missed you. -Like you missed your last smog check.
You don't have to play poker with me.
Well, you always were the wild card. What do you want?
I need you to find my sister, Mia. She's been carnapped!
Quit the waterworks, will you? Where did you last see her?
She was working for Big D.
Big D, you say?
She worked at his club. The Carbacabana.
You wanted to see me, seลor?
I'm looking for Mia. You seen her?
Mia! That ragtop. I don't remember.
Well, maybe this'll help you remember.
Maybe.
Well, now I remember.
I saw her a couple of days ago with Big D.
-Where did they go? -I don't know, and I don't care.
But she did smell salty. Like the ocean.
Hey, this guy bugging you?
Not yet, but a girl can hope.
Well, he's bugging me.
Whoa! Hello, Clyde. Where'd you get the hand truck?
You're a very nosy fella, kitty cat.
You know what happens to guys who shine their headlights
in the wrong places? No? Wanna guess?
-I don't know, free carwash? -No. They lose them.
Next time, it's the blinkers. Understand?
I was down to one headlight. But I could still see just fine.
Hey, Stinky? What's the dirt on the street?
-I don't know. -No?
No. They got me working the alleys, dumping all these blowouts.
-Blowouts, you say? -Yeah, it's odd though.
-Odd? -Yeah, they all have this smell.
-Smell? -They smell salty.
-Salty? Ocean? -Like the ocean.
I haven't smelled that since I worked down at the docks.
-Rocks? Ducks? -Docks. Docks.
The docks! Thanks, Stinky!
You're welcome, Mater.
Mia!
Come on! Put a little hustle into it!
Big D! Wait till I tell the DA.
You ain't telling the DA nothing.
-What? I'm being shanghaied! -No!
Tia! You double-crossing double-crosser.
I had no choice. It was the only way to save my sister.
Well, you always did the right thing. Just the wrong way.
No!
What'd you do?
Like you don't know, Lieutenant Lightning McQueen.
Looks like we finally caught you, Big D.
Oh, no! McQueen!
-Get him! -Whoa!
Mater!
Whoa!
Just what I thought. Counterfeit tyres.
You led us right to him, Mater. Take him away, boys.
It was a fine mess you got me into, Tia.
I'm not bad, Mater. I just drive that way.
Come on. Let's pick up where we left off.
Mater, that is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.
Come on, Mater! Everybody conga!
I'm right behind you!
If I am lying, then I am crying.
Morning, everyone. Sure is peaceful.
-Hey, losers! -Drifting through, baby!
Not in my town, you don't!
Get back here, you import punks!
Hey, go easy on them, Sheriff!
I used to be an import.
-What? No way! -Yes, way.
It all started when one day...
Hey, there, bud. Looks like you could use a tow somewhere.
Yes, but it is very far.
Well, shoot, no tow is too far for Tow Mater.
Man, I gotta change my slogan.
Well, here you go.
Domo arigato, Mr Tomato.
And a do itashi mashite to you.
What in the world?
Hello, ladies.
A whatsit?
He challenges you to a drift race!
-Drift race! -Drift race!
We will race at midnight.
Well, they seem friendly.
Mater-san, if you are going to win, you need modification!
-Modify! -Modify!
-Modify! -Modify!
Modify! What's that?
You look good, but can you race?
Can I?
Hey, can I?
Konbanwa, gentlecars. Let this be an honourable race.
You must race to the top of Tokyo Tower!
First one to seize the flag will become
King of all Drifters!
Well, what happens to the loser?
The loser will be stripped of all modifications
and become stock.
But I just got all this fancy stuff.
Ready?
Set-o!
Go!
You can't drift. You are loser!
I'll show you!
-Wrong way! -Look out!
Get back here, you import punk!
Look out!
Coming through!
Doughnuts! I love doughnuts!
Hello!
Good move, but not good enough!
Oh, no! Ninjas!
Whoa, ninjas? What did you do?
Well, shoot, you ought to know. You was there, too.
Lightning Dragon McQueen!
I'll take care of this dragon style!
Spinning dragon attack!
Oh, no! He's almost to the tower!
-Quickly, follow me! -Right behind you!
Look at me, I'm drifting!
Whoa, look out!
Oh, no! We're running out of road!
-No! I can't stop! -Then go!
Lightning dragon fireball!
Cannonball!
Victory is mine.
Well, hey. There you are.
Where did you come from?
I come from Radiator Springs.
You cannot defeat me!
-I can, too. -Cannot!
-Can, too. -Cannot!
-Can, too! Can, too! Can, too! -Cannot, cannot, cannot!
-Can, too! Can, too! Can, too! -Stop saying that!
I win.
No!
I'm stock!
And that's how I become Tokyo Mater, King of all the Drifters.
What? Mater, that did not happen.
Oh, yeah? Says you.
Modify!
Look at me! I'm modified!
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