All language subtitles for Malcolm s07e21 Morp.eng

Man, I hate finals.

I was up all night studying.

Not me, I slept like a baby.

What are you doing?

Just making sure I know the
answers for my history test today.

There's more than one way
to be a genius, Malcolm.

Malcolm in the Middle
7.21 - "Morp"

Synchronisation par Max & Tyno,
Script original par Raceman.

Forom.com, Life-is-Unfair.tk
& Malcolm-France.com

Hey, Dewey, what have you got there?

I have to do an autobiography
for my English class,

and my teacher wants me to include
a few pictures from my early childhood.

Well, it looks like you have
a lot to choose from.

Yeah. You guys really did
a great job with Francis...

And Reese...

And Malcolm.

Now why don't we take a look
at a few of my precious memories.

Spider.

There.

Now we have that memory.

Will you stop feeling sorry for
yourself, there must be a hundreds of pictures of you in here.

Well, here is poor, neglected Dewey
having great time at SeaWorld.

It's so blurry, you can't
even tell that's me.

Well, you can't prove it's not.

Dewey, at least we got you a memory book.
That's more than we've done for Jamie.

And I suppose that makes you
feel pretty good about yourselves.

You want to know the truth?

You were the fourth child.

By the time you came along, this house
was in a state of complete chaos.

The only sleep I got was when
I'd nod off on the drive to work.

So forgive us if we didn't get
a chance to take every picture, every video, or get you every vaccination.

-I wasn't vaccinated?
-Tell you what, Dewey.

You get whooping cough,
I promise I'll take a ton of pictures.

You won't believe it!

I just got asked to the
prom by Nick Tompkins!

Oh, great, it's prom time already.

An evening of posers and phonies out
to make the rest of us feel like crap.

It's just like every other day of high
school, except it costs a thousand dollars.

That's inspired.

"A Night To Cherish"?

It makes last year's "A Night To
Remember" seem so shallow.

Yeah, I wouldn't expect you
to show up, anyway, Carla.

You'll probably be home
alone in your room,

listening to Morrissey and gouging out the
eyes of the models in Vogue magazine.

Aw, does this mean we're
not best friends anymore?

That was great.

You're Carla, right?

The one who read the phone
book out loud at the talent show.

Yeah. I was surprised they let
me get all the way to the B's.

You know what sucks about this school?

Students, teachers, the textbooks,
the asbestos-filled building and the toxic dump it's built on?

Well, that, plus they never offer
anything for people like us to do.

You know what would be cool?

If there was a party that was the
complete opposite of the prom.

You mean like a "morp."

What?

A morp, the complete
opposite of the prom.

Morp. I like that.

Yeah, instead of paying $500 for a dress,
we could just wear jeans and a sweatshirt.

And instead of a limo,
we can all just take the bus.

We should totally do this.

-Can I get your number?
-Sure.

It wasn't me who threw
that pudding at you!

Well, you should have thought of that before
you started looking like the guy who did!

Excuse me?

You're Reese, aren't you?

Wait a second, I'm in
the middle of something.

Don't worry, somebody will find you,
they do drug searches on Fridays.

Okay, what?

What are you doing prom night?

That's a Saturday.

I'll be throwing shopping
carts into the reservoir.

My name is Jeanie.

For the past four years, I've been
super-focused on keeping a perfect GPA.

But now that I've got my
acceptance letter from Brown,

I feel like I've got some time to
experience high school social life.

So I want you to
take me to the prom.

Yeah... that sounds like
a fun night, except...

the next morning I wake up like an idiot
with no shopping carts in the reservoir.

I'll pay you $200.

Two hundred dollars?!

Just to go out on a date?

And the career counselor said
I should be a mechanic.

I can't wait to throw
this in his face.

Yeah...

You're basically a tear down,

but I think I can get you ready.

Meet me here tomorrow at 3:00.

How sweet is this?

I think she likes you.

You know, I felt pretty bad after our
little conversation the other day. So...

I did a little poking around the garage
myself, and you'll never guess what I found.

Dewey's artwork.

Kindergarten, first grade.

Oh, look, art camp.

It's all here.

Sorry, Dad, I don't
know what to say.

Wait a minute, here's
a drawing I did of Grandma.

And it's beautiful.

You did a really nice job
with her whiskey bottle.

I also have her missing a leg.

Interesting, since she didn't
lose it until last year.

Dewey, if you're trying to tell me
that you can predict the future...

So you're neglectful, and
you think I'm an idiot.

That's nice.

I spent over an hour on
this rainbow, Dewey!

You're not an easy
boy to love, you know!

Thanks for coming to the meeting.

This morp of ours is going to
blow those prom zombies away.

Do we have to call it a meeting?

That sounds like something the
dance committee would call it.

Okay, you're totally right,
this isn't a meeting.

But I still think that we need
to have some sort of plan.

Hey, how crazy is this?

So you know how everyone wears
formal clothes the prom, right?

So how about if we all went naked?

I'm not sure that's
such a good idea.

Can we go naked?

-No.
-Here we go.

King Malcolm handing down
his rules from the mountaintop.

Will there be uniforms?

Little flags with
your picture on them?

A.J., you moron, the can drive was not
a fascist conspiracy, and neither is this.

Oh, my God.

The backbiting, the name-calling...
this is just like French club!

Exactly. This is turning out
like every other school event.

We got some weasly tyrant
pushing everybody around.

The scared masses.

A poet willing to speak the truth.

I say we should all be free to make
our own anti-prom statement.

And each choose our
own location to do it in.

In other words, we all stay home on
prom night like we do every year?

That'll send a message.

Look, guys, the morp is too
good of an idea to let personality conflicts get in the way.

We have been outsiders that
have never belonged to anything.

And now, for one night,
we can be a part of something.

And do it in a way that allows
us to all to be individuals.

Malcolm's right.

Let's make this happen.

I have an idea
for refreshments.

What if we get a big punch bowl,
and then we all drink punch.

You know, ironically.

I guess I could write our manifesto.

I've already got the
first 1,500 pages.

That's great.

And I'll arrange for us to use the
boiler room in the basement.

The only problem is, it's full of desks.
We'll have to move all those out.

Who's got Friday night open?

Let's review the evening.

What time do you pick me up?

I ring your doorbell at 6:00.

I'm prompt because
it's a sign of respect.

And when you get to my house...

I know.

No throwing eggs at the door.

Also a sign of respect.

And when we're at the dance, and
it's time to say something nice,

what do you say?

I don't know, "Thanks for shaving?"

-We went over this!
-Right, right, right.

"Every time I look at you you
somehow become more beautiful."

His teeth are done.

They're not white enough.

Don't you people realize that
we're running out of time here?

Look at this.

He's not even close.

I want his face flawless,
his hair shorter and shinier.

He's an illiterate thug.

I don't think it's too much to
ask that he looks perfect!

You heard the lady.

Make me glow.

Lois, I don't want to alarm you, but
there is a naked man in your house!

What took you so long?

The boys left for the
prom a half hour ago.

Yeah, I know, I got a flat tire on
my way to Jamie's babysitter.

I had to drive back on the rim.

There were a lot of sparks, but
I don't think anything caught fire.

The main thing is
that you and I have...

Dewey!

What are you doing here?

I live here.

Honey, Dewey's here!

What's he doing here?

Don't you have a prom to go to?

I'm not in high school.

He says he's not in high school!

Oh, for God sakes, Hal, we're just
going to have to take a raincheck.

No!

Okay, look, I'm very sorry,
but you got to get out of here.

What?

But I'm researching
a history report on-ine.

If it's money you want, you got it.

Here, you ought to be able
to have a good time with that.

You can go to a movie, grab a burger.

Hey, the Hyatt has a piano bar.

-But I don't have any shoes.
-Buy some!

I love you, son.

Listen, maybe we'll go to the zoo
sometime, huh? Just you and me!

Wow. Quite a turnout.

Yeah.

We even got three home-schooled kids.

Here, Carla, hey, Malcolm.

Have some punch.

There's nothing in there.

I know.

It's a statement about how completely
empty the real prom experience is.

The cookies are just cookies.

I love your wrist corsage.

Yeah. I found it in
the crisper drawer.

Good job, guys.

This sucks the least of anything
I've ever done in my life.

I met a guy here who hates
Starbucks more than I do.

This is fantastic, Malcolm.

All these people would have been home
tonight feeling lonely and miserable.

You should feel really proud.

Yeah, I guess.

What do you mean "you guess"?

I know, I know, it just...

I thought it would feel better.

There's something missing.

I didn't see the schedule of events.

What time is everyone
going to nude up?

I just have to come out and say it.

I was incredible, and you
were no slouch yourself.

I'm the lucky one, Hal.
All I had to do was show up.

Did you hear the phone ring?

Hal, I couldn't have heard
the space shuttle land.

Hi. This is Dewey. Remember me?

Your fourth son?

Nah, I don't expect you to miss me,

but at some point, Dad, you may
miss the wallet you threw at me,

You gave him your wallet?!

So here's the deal: If you'd like to see
all your money and credit cards again...

Wait a minute.

That bell ringing in the background.

I know I've heard that before!

So here's the deal: If
you'd like to see all your...

That is Saint Matthew's.

No, wait.

Saint Luke's on Third.

It's definitely a Lutheran bell.

If you'd like to see your all your money
and credit cards again, meet me where they're building the new library,

at the corner of Washington and Olive.

Ah! That's it!

Dinner and the limo were fantastic,

and your parents were delightful.

You didn't tell me that
they were Asian, too.

Here come Mike and Anna.

Just smile and don't be yourself.

Hi, Jeanie.

Is that Reese?

Hello, it is such
a pleasure to see you.

So you've met.

Yeah, he steals my lunch every day
and throws me in a garbage can.

Your mother makes a
marvelous tuna fish sandwich.

Give her my best, will you?

I've never seen Reese so...

un-psycho-like before.

How could I be anything but a perfect gentleman
around someone as breathtaking as Jeanie?

-Bye. See ya.
-See ya.

Reese, that wasn't in the script.

I'm sorry. Are you going
to spray me again?

No, it was actually really nice.

I liked it.

Would you like to have
this dance with me?

I'd be delighted.

You can go ahead and grab my butt.

You're paying for it.

Now, remember, we only have to
be nice to him until he gets close enough to the van to grab him.

Do you folks have a young
boy you don't care about?

What?

He wanted me to give you this.

You see the way Dewey's
throwing around my money?

He has minions!

Oh, well, at least he
returned my HMO card.

"If you want another..." Oh, great!
If I want another piece of my wallet,

we have to meet him at the
corner of Temple and Fourth,

"Wear what's in the bag."

Oh! Will you look at this?

It's bad enough we have to traipse
all over town looking for him, now we have to dress up?!

How's he even gonna know
if we're wearing this?

I'll tell you how.

The little monster
has a camera in here.

If you think you're going to make a fool out
of me, I've got news for you, little man:

It's not going to happen!

Malcolm, I don't understand this.

The morp is going great downstairs.
Why do we have to come up here?

It finally hit me:

These people have to know that
we're having a good time without them.

Why do you care what they think?

I don't care, but I want
them to know I don't care.

Perfect.

Hey, Malcolm.

Isn't this a great party?

Open your eyes, Reese. Everything
about this night is completely phony.

Maybe it is phony, but maybe
something that starts out as phony can turn into something real.

You may call this corny, Malcolm,

but this really is a night to cherish.

Reese...

Sorry, Steve, official prom business.

Can I have your attention, everybody?

I just thought you people should know

that while you're up here enjoying what
you have deluded yourselves into thinking is the greatest night of your lives,

the people who you've excluded from
this charade are downstairs right now,

having a party that obliterates yours.

You think you're on the inside,
but you're on the outside.

How does that make you feel?

*I feel good*

*I knew that I would know*

*I feel good*

*I knew that I would know*

*So good*

*So good*

*I got you*

This is our fifth stop, Hal.

Is this gonna go on all night?

Well, he's certainly dragging it out.

So far, all he's given me
back from my wallet is crap!

I got my library card,
my organ donor card...

Oh, wait, he did give
me back my tip chart.

God knows how much of your money
he's spent on presents and party supplies.

So Dewey wants a party?

You hold him down,
I'll give him a party!

-Can I help you?
-Oh, uh...

Yes, uh...

"I'm Dewey's jackass father."

-The sex maniacs are here!
-Cool!

If you can keep your hands off your
wife long enough, pull up to the window.

You guys were so much hotter in my
mind when Dewey told me the story.

Just give us our stuff.

Here you go.

Ah, my driver's license.

We're getting closer.

Look at that.

He drew a mustache on you.

No, I did that.

I wanted to see how it looked.

-Punch?
-No, thanks.

Look, I know that was embarrassing,
but all those people up there think you're a creep, anyway, so nothing lost.

I guess.

Oh, my God!

So there really is a party
going on down here.

Look, we're having a great time.

We're just enjoying just
being with each other.

Yeah, but this place is
so dark and creepy.

Didn't the janitor kill someone
down here a few years ago?

Okay, you've come down to see the
freak show. You've had your fun.

Why don't you leave us alone?

You know what?

You guys should just come upstairs.

What?

Yeah, there's only a month left of school,
and all this stuff about who's cool and who's not, I mean, it's just kind of silly, isn't it?

Oh, really?

Was it silly in fourth grade, when
I was the only kid on our street you didn't invite to your birthday party?

I sent you an invitation.

-You stood me up.
-No, I didn't.

I would have loved to have gone.

-Oh, my God.
-Oh, my God.

What are you doing?

Suddenly a hug solves everything?

Come on, guys, let's go to the prom.

Carla?

Heather?

This isn't the way
I thought it would happen,

but I just got asked to the prom!

A.J., you can't be serious.

Hey, it took guts for those girls
to come down here and apologize.

And I'd like to think I'm big enough
to be able to admit I'd like to have sex with one of them.

You can't just let them say "I'm sorry"
after 12 years of treating us like crap!

Wait a minute, they never even said "sorry!"

This is a trap!

These are the same people who made
fun of your clothes all through school,

and laughed at your haircuts, and
called you Malcolm-Balcolm!

You'll be sorry!

Finally.

Now we've got some
breathing room in here.

*She doesn't wait for me*

*And now that she's gone*

*I feel that she'll never be*

*Back in my arms*
-You're a really good dancer.

When I'm with you, it doesn't
even feel like we're dancing.

It's like we're floating.

I misjudged you, Reese.

I just chose you because you
weren't completely hideous, and I knew you wouldn't have a date.

But you're so much more than that.

You've made me feel wonderful.

It's been a really great
night for me, too.

You helped me find a little part of me
that I didn't even know was there,

the part that isn't a gigantic jackass.

You know...

I wasn't planning on the
night ending this way,

but why don't we get out of here,

grab a blanket and a bottle
of wine and go to the beach.

-You mean it?
-Yes, Reese.

I really want you.

It's 12:00 already?

Too bad, I was having fun.

Well, see you at school.

Reese, where are you going?

It's midnight. I'm off the clock.

But what about us?

And all those things you said?

Well, if I want to make a career out
of this, I've gotta satisfy my customers.

And I think I did.

Tell your friends.

Why do we have to haul all this
stuff in here when we have no intention of giving him a party?

We have to humor him until he reveals
himself. This has got to be the place.

There you are!

You are in so much
trouble, young man!

I want my wallet now.

Here.

At least we got here before
you spent all my cash.

It cost so much to keep this
place open after hours,

I had to put that on your credit card.

Okay, Mr. smart guy.

Now you can help us load
all this stuff back in the car.

I know you think you're having
a party, but you can forget about it.

This isn't for me.

It's too late for my childhood,
but it's not too late for his.

Jamie?

Here's a camera.

So now you have no excuse
for not documenting every important event in Jamie's life.

Starting tonight with his party.

This is a really nice camera.
How could you afford...?

Right.

Here, sweetie.

Let's go have some cake.

That was a good thing you did, son.

Thanks.

Enjoy the cake.

That's the last thing you're going
to eat in a long time that hasn't been dipped in sardine juice.

Hey! Finally!

A picture for your memory book.

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