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1
00:00:01,947 --> 00:00:03,182
Boys, cookies!
2
00:00:03,480 --> 00:00:04,350
All right!
3
00:00:04,483 --> 00:00:05,556
Nuh-uh, not that one.
4
00:00:05,600 --> 00:00:07,330
I put Dewey's antibiotics in that one.
5
00:00:07,600 --> 00:00:08,953
Take this one. It's biggest.
6
00:00:10,913 --> 00:00:13,513
-Did you put anything in this one?
-Of course not. Just take it.
7
00:00:14,700 --> 00:00:16,300
Then take this one 20 minutes later.
8
00:00:20,020 --> 00:00:26,020
Malcolm in the Middle
7.01 - "Burning Man"
9
00:00:31,020 --> 00:00:37,020
Synchronisation par Max & Tyno,
Script original par Raceman.
10
00:00:42,020 --> 00:00:48,020
Forom.com, Life-is-Unfair.tk
& Malcolm-France.com
11
00:00:52,000 --> 00:00:54,073
There's no doubt about it,
we're totally gonna go this year.
12
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Totally. It's not even a question.
13
00:00:55,800 --> 00:00:56,454
What's there to question?
14
00:00:56,591 --> 00:00:57,759
Nothing. Because we're going.
15
00:00:57,900 --> 00:00:59,049
-We're totally going.
-Totally.
16
00:00:59,255 --> 00:01:01,416
Oh, God, Burning Man again?
17
00:01:01,695 --> 00:01:03,554
Every year it's the same thing.
18
00:01:04,157 --> 00:01:05,778
"This time we're totally going!"
19
00:01:05,976 --> 00:01:07,739
"Oh, yeah, totally!"
20
00:01:07,900 --> 00:01:10,300
And every year you chicken out
with some pathetic excuse.
21
00:01:10,501 --> 00:01:14,305
My personal favorite was last year's
"really bad Slurpee headache."
22
00:01:14,449 --> 00:01:17,700
See? That is exactly the kind of
ignorant talk I'd expect from someone
23
00:01:17,701 --> 00:01:20,027
who doesn't have any appreciation
for what Burning Man is.
24
00:01:20,864 --> 00:01:24,261
A week of freedom out in the desert,
naked women, getting back
25
00:01:24,262 --> 00:01:28,571
to your primal nature, naked women,
people doing art, naked women.
26
00:01:28,650 --> 00:01:29,418
Are all the women naked?
27
00:01:30,350 --> 00:01:31,684
That is all you heard, isn't it?
28
00:01:33,300 --> 00:01:33,829
Mom...
29
00:01:35,550 --> 00:01:36,633
Dad breakfast...
30
00:01:37,424 --> 00:01:38,021
Jamie...
31
00:01:38,840 --> 00:01:39,564
Dewey...
32
00:01:43,033 --> 00:01:43,998
Dad dinner.
33
00:01:45,900 --> 00:01:47,324
WENT TO BURNING MAN
BACK MONDAY
34
00:01:47,350 --> 00:01:48,792
There. That should get us till tomorrow.
35
00:01:48,793 --> 00:01:50,677
I can't believe it. We're really doing it!
36
00:01:50,800 --> 00:01:52,252
We're actually going to Burning Man!
37
00:01:52,950 --> 00:01:53,996
Hitchhiking?!
38
00:01:54,400 --> 00:01:57,300
Hitchhiking on the highway like hobos?!
39
00:01:57,350 --> 00:02:00,574
Thank God your mother undercooked
the chicken last night, or who knows
40
00:02:00,575 --> 00:02:02,200
when we might have found out about this?!
41
00:02:02,201 --> 00:02:04,034
What were you thinking?!
42
00:02:04,050 --> 00:02:05,869
Sneaking off in the middle
of the night to go to some
43
00:02:05,870 --> 00:02:07,872
overblown keg party in the desert!
44
00:02:08,001 --> 00:02:10,176
That is not what Burning Man is all about.
45
00:02:10,548 --> 00:02:13,858
Burning Man is an incredible, interactive
experiment in human creativity,
46
00:02:13,859 --> 00:02:16,099
where you do art just for art's sake,
47
00:02:16,100 --> 00:02:18,648
and you make music from instruments
that came to you in dreams.
48
00:02:18,898 --> 00:02:21,900
It's the one place where you're
free to let go and really see
49
00:02:21,901 --> 00:02:24,450
what you're capable of creating without
worrying what anyone else thinks!
50
00:02:24,700 --> 00:02:26,360
That's what Burning Man is all about!
51
00:02:30,500 --> 00:02:32,200
I think she actually might've bought that.
52
00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:37,337
This Burning Person sounds like it's gonna
be a lot of fun. What a great idea, Malcolm.
53
00:02:37,600 --> 00:02:40,175
Yeah. Maybe next year we can
take Grandma to Mardi Gras.
54
00:02:40,300 --> 00:02:42,463
You think I enjoy having
powers that I can't control?
55
00:02:42,550 --> 00:02:44,596
Believe me, I'd much rather
be as stupid as you are.
56
00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:46,559
Don't try sucking up to me now.
57
00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:50,612
I still can't believe Mr. Barnes
let you borrow his fancy RV.
58
00:02:50,613 --> 00:02:54,416
This is so classy. This is like
Buckingham Palace on wheels.
59
00:02:54,450 --> 00:02:58,140
He ripped one on the elevator just before
the CEO got on, and I took the blame for it.
60
00:02:58,250 --> 00:03:00,190
That's the way things work
in the corporate world.
61
00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:02,100
You're unselfish, and it paid off.
62
00:03:02,300 --> 00:03:05,262
Hey, you boys check out the flat
screen TV back in the bedroom?
63
00:03:05,350 --> 00:03:08,123
And the two-thirds-scale
fold-down pool table?
64
00:03:08,280 --> 00:03:10,151
Boy, we're gonna have
so much fun in this baby!
65
00:03:11,300 --> 00:03:12,680
Whoa, whoa. What was that?
66
00:03:13,250 --> 00:03:14,763
I just opened an apple juice for Jamie.
67
00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:18,159
And now you can close it back up.
I thought I was clear about this.
68
00:03:18,450 --> 00:03:22,219
The camper is going back without
a single stain, smudge, smell or dent.
69
00:03:22,650 --> 00:03:25,603
-Yeah, but I really think Jamie...
-Dewey, what is the rule?
70
00:03:26,650 --> 00:03:28,891
This one RV is worth three of me.
71
00:03:29,034 --> 00:03:29,711
Okay.
72
00:03:32,968 --> 00:03:33,989
Help me get this grate off.
73
00:03:34,600 --> 00:03:36,281
I'm gonna ditch out when
we slow down for a turn.
74
00:03:36,282 --> 00:03:38,296
I am not going to Burning Man
with Mom and Dad.
75
00:03:38,300 --> 00:03:40,384
Reese, we're in the middle of the desert.
76
00:03:40,400 --> 00:03:43,834
I know what you're thinking. The road
runners are too smart to catch and eat.
77
00:03:44,124 --> 00:03:45,955
But the coyotes are idiots.
78
00:03:46,175 --> 00:03:48,430
Look, it might not be as
embarrassing as we think.
79
00:03:48,663 --> 00:03:50,461
If we move quick, we might
be able to sneak off
80
00:03:50,462 --> 00:03:52,682
without anyone knowing that we came
to Burning Man with our parents.
81
00:03:52,700 --> 00:03:53,751
We're here!
82
00:04:16,800 --> 00:04:18,155
Hey, neighbors!
83
00:04:18,645 --> 00:04:20,249
I'm gonna do art, too.
84
00:04:20,300 --> 00:04:21,820
I brought my paintbrushes.
85
00:04:22,230 --> 00:04:24,765
Okay, let's get moving here.
86
00:04:24,766 --> 00:04:26,815
Reese, Malcolm. I want you guys...
87
00:04:28,170 --> 00:04:29,000
They're gone.
88
00:04:29,100 --> 00:04:31,146
They shimmied under the
RV and took off running.
89
00:04:31,147 --> 00:04:35,615
Oh. Well, then I guess it's up to you to
help me set up a protective perimeter around the camper.
90
00:04:35,620 --> 00:04:38,757
We'll need about 40 rocks,
at least the size of bowling balls.
91
00:04:39,783 --> 00:04:41,928
I'm sorry, son. You snooze, you lose.
92
00:04:41,950 --> 00:04:43,828
Now, come on, come on.
Don't let the flies get in.
93
00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:47,204
Look at this place, it's amazing!
94
00:04:49,446 --> 00:04:51,500
That has to be the coolest guy on Earth!
95
00:04:51,501 --> 00:04:54,608
See? I told you everything was gonna be
all right even with Mom and Dad here.
96
00:04:54,999 --> 00:04:56,265
We just need to make sure
we look out for each other...
97
00:04:56,266 --> 00:04:59,760
-Excuse-me.
-Whoa! Ow! Ow! Damn it!
98
00:04:59,964 --> 00:05:01,707
I stepped on a cactus.
Can you give me a hand?
99
00:05:03,780 --> 00:05:04,346
Reese?
100
00:05:11,200 --> 00:05:11,875
Hey, buddy?
101
00:05:12,400 --> 00:05:13,651
You know where the topless chicks are?
102
00:05:14,100 --> 00:05:16,666
And I'm not interested in the uggos
or blimps, if you know what I'm saying.
103
00:05:18,300 --> 00:05:20,107
Follow me, I'm going that way.
104
00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:21,874
Hey, man, want some Stanley?
105
00:05:24,550 --> 00:05:25,750
First time at Burning Man?
106
00:05:25,751 --> 00:05:26,399
Yeah.
107
00:05:26,400 --> 00:05:27,687
Yeah, I can always tell the newbies.
108
00:05:27,688 --> 00:05:29,093
Hey, you guys, you want a little Stanley?
109
00:05:31,824 --> 00:05:32,631
What's Stanley?
110
00:05:32,700 --> 00:05:34,789
Oh, Stanley was a buddy of mine.
111
00:05:35,201 --> 00:05:37,749
We've been coming to Burning
Man together almost 20 years.
112
00:05:40,769 --> 00:05:44,938
Anyway, he passed on over the winter,
and he always said he wanted his ashes
113
00:05:44,939 --> 00:05:50,140
scattered here, kind of as a way of
spreading the spirit of Burning Man to the people and the family he loved.
114
00:05:51,800 --> 00:05:53,300
And you're allowed to do that?
115
00:05:53,800 --> 00:05:55,450
Spray a dead guy on people?!
116
00:05:55,900 --> 00:05:59,037
I got suspended for a week for putting
a mouse's head on the end of my pencil.
117
00:05:59,723 --> 00:06:02,421
Burning Man's all about freedom, dude.
You can do whatever you want here.
118
00:06:04,450 --> 00:06:05,521
Whatever I want?
119
00:06:06,559 --> 00:06:07,828
I could kick this over?
120
00:06:08,685 --> 00:06:09,618
Or break that?
121
00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:12,980
Well, I guess if you really felt you had to.
122
00:06:14,650 --> 00:06:16,822
Doesn't that kind of take the fun
out of mindless destruction?
123
00:06:16,823 --> 00:06:18,868
That's what the flaming catapult's for.
124
00:06:22,450 --> 00:06:25,150
Yeah, but the real spirit of Burning
Man isn't about destruction.
125
00:06:25,701 --> 00:06:28,642
It's about creating,
participating, contributing.
126
00:06:28,650 --> 00:06:31,936
Building a community that
needs you, relies on you.
127
00:06:32,401 --> 00:06:35,458
It's about allowing yourself
to become part of the whole,
128
00:06:35,459 --> 00:06:38,173
and then coming away from
it with more than you brought.
129
00:06:38,900 --> 00:06:40,975
No, there's no feeling like it in the world.
130
00:06:41,291 --> 00:06:41,902
Wow.
131
00:06:41,903 --> 00:06:44,194
Yeah, it's a mind-altering journey, son...
132
00:06:45,891 --> 00:06:47,404
if you're willing to take it.
133
00:06:49,850 --> 00:06:50,607
You know what?
134
00:06:51,078 --> 00:06:53,054
I think I want some Stanley.
135
00:06:58,200 --> 00:07:03,885
Wow! This stuff is gorgeous.
We really have to get some for the house.
136
00:07:05,250 --> 00:07:06,016
Howdy!
137
00:07:06,900 --> 00:07:08,739
Just getting the old homestead set up.
138
00:07:09,000 --> 00:07:13,713
Best hamburgers and dogs you've ever tasted
are on me when I get this baby fired up, huh?
139
00:07:15,333 --> 00:07:16,723
What's he doing?
140
00:07:17,000 --> 00:07:18,225
It's performance art.
141
00:07:19,550 --> 00:07:22,954
He's skewering the empty banality
of the modern suburban dad.
142
00:07:22,955 --> 00:07:25,294
Honey, where'd I put my good basting brush?
143
00:07:27,212 --> 00:07:27,876
Honey?
144
00:07:29,923 --> 00:07:30,661
Honey?
145
00:07:31,190 --> 00:07:32,316
This guy's good.
146
00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:38,797
No one told me there was a
looky-loo convention in town.
147
00:07:39,250 --> 00:07:41,250
Dad, do I have to circle the whole thing?
148
00:07:41,251 --> 00:07:42,921
I can't find any more rocks.
149
00:07:42,922 --> 00:07:46,337
Son, look, we might be in the desert,
but we are still civilized people,
150
00:07:46,338 --> 00:07:50,727
and civilized people put up arbitrary boundaries
that they will fight to the death to protect.
151
00:07:50,800 --> 00:07:54,000
I'm pretty sure we passed some nice-sized
rocks when we turned into the camp.
152
00:07:54,323 --> 00:07:55,559
That's half a mile away!
153
00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:56,431
Don't be silly.
154
00:07:56,650 --> 00:07:57,749
Two miles, easy.
155
00:07:58,013 --> 00:07:59,278
Here we go!
156
00:08:01,500 --> 00:08:03,646
Hal, this place is so great!
157
00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:06,335
I met the nicest group of gals
down by the Porta Potti's.
158
00:08:06,336 --> 00:08:10,393
They call themselves a "tribe," like
a group of wild Indians. Isn't that cute?
159
00:08:10,500 --> 00:08:13,095
They invited me to the
hemp-braiding tent later.
160
00:08:13,096 --> 00:08:18,441
What are you using the Porta Potti's for
when we have the world's greatest toilet ten feet away in the RV?
161
00:08:19,176 --> 00:08:20,855
That thing will suck down a small deer.
162
00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:26,812
Mention free food and
they start gathering like flies.
163
00:08:27,530 --> 00:08:28,631
FIRST AID
164
00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:33,505
This is great. I'm gonna spend my entire two
days at Burning Man standing in this line.
165
00:08:34,200 --> 00:08:34,835
Hey, man.
166
00:08:35,930 --> 00:08:38,455
You know, the line's much shorter
over in front of the Shaman's tent.
167
00:08:38,694 --> 00:08:39,291
The what?
168
00:08:39,456 --> 00:08:40,438
Oh, you will love her.
169
00:08:40,500 --> 00:08:42,446
She totally cured my plantar's warts.
170
00:08:42,949 --> 00:08:44,140
-Thanks, but...
-Come on, man.
171
00:08:44,345 --> 00:08:45,640
You think I'd lead you wrong?
172
00:09:00,500 --> 00:09:04,794
And remember, if you're gonna eat glass, chew
at least ten times before you swallow. Okay?
173
00:09:06,975 --> 00:09:08,771
Ooh, what do we have here?
174
00:09:08,801 --> 00:09:09,830
I stepped on a cactus.
175
00:09:09,863 --> 00:09:11,214
The needle went right through my shoe.
176
00:09:11,230 --> 00:09:12,286
Let's take a look.
177
00:09:13,491 --> 00:09:14,578
It's not a big deal.
178
00:09:14,714 --> 00:09:17,004
I think I just need some disinfectant
and a band-aid and I'll be...
179
00:09:19,257 --> 00:09:19,897
Ma'am?
180
00:09:19,910 --> 00:09:20,745
Mmm.
181
00:09:21,657 --> 00:09:24,143
You've internalized a lot
of criticism, haven't you?
182
00:09:24,889 --> 00:09:26,015
Well, I don't know.
183
00:09:26,132 --> 00:09:26,772
I guess.
184
00:09:26,881 --> 00:09:27,890
But what does...
185
00:09:31,764 --> 00:09:34,347
Okay... here's your problem.
186
00:09:34,544 --> 00:09:37,136
You have an incredible amount
of passion in your soul.
187
00:09:37,543 --> 00:09:40,883
But you've got to let down
the armor you're using to shield it.
188
00:09:42,683 --> 00:09:44,081
You also need a tetanus shot.
189
00:09:46,703 --> 00:09:49,615
Okay, she's almost as old as my mom,
and obviously crazy as a loon.
190
00:09:50,343 --> 00:09:51,664
So why am I so turned on?
191
00:09:53,950 --> 00:09:56,163
Most Western medicines numb the body.
192
00:09:56,218 --> 00:09:57,441
They silence it.
193
00:09:57,572 --> 00:10:01,106
But the body's an amazing thing, Malcolm.
It can tell you what's wrong with it.
194
00:10:02,402 --> 00:10:04,557
All real healing is just listening.
195
00:10:04,631 --> 00:10:06,592
I don't see anything alternative about that.
196
00:10:07,743 --> 00:10:09,902
I just don't see colonizing
space as the answer.
197
00:10:09,973 --> 00:10:11,864
I mean, if we can't solve our problems here,
198
00:10:11,865 --> 00:10:13,474
what's the point of just
exporting them there?
199
00:10:13,720 --> 00:10:16,754
Even Werner Von Braun said
that everything science taught him
200
00:10:16,793 --> 00:10:20,482
strengthened his belief in the continuity
of spiritual existence after death.
201
00:10:20,762 --> 00:10:24,891
Okay, I buy that Godzilla came out of
the collective purging of Japanese guilt
202
00:10:24,892 --> 00:10:28,126
after World War II, but can you explain to
me why the costume had to look so fake?
203
00:10:28,328 --> 00:10:29,609
Well, let's see...
204
00:10:30,078 --> 00:10:31,437
First I'd say...
205
00:10:32,426 --> 00:10:33,397
The Go-Go's.
206
00:10:34,156 --> 00:10:35,107
Then The Bangles...
207
00:10:35,736 --> 00:10:37,891
Bananarama and Josie and the Pussycats.
208
00:10:38,113 --> 00:10:40,326
I can't believe it! I hated
Charlotte's Web, too!
209
00:10:40,524 --> 00:10:42,505
I just wanted to squash
that whiny little spider.
210
00:10:43,140 --> 00:10:44,777
Deep Dish.
211
00:10:45,361 --> 00:10:46,740
Chocolate chip.
212
00:10:47,450 --> 00:10:49,249
Oscar the Grouch.
213
00:10:52,191 --> 00:10:56,016
Wow. And I thought all that crap everyone
said about love was just to piss me off.
214
00:11:02,609 --> 00:11:04,437
-So you're going to come?
-Oh, absolutely.
215
00:11:04,476 --> 00:11:05,913
That sounds like a hoot and a half.
216
00:11:05,928 --> 00:11:07,797
Great. It's by the giant foam tongue.
217
00:11:07,828 --> 00:11:09,935
Just make a left at the guy in
the phone booth full of Jell-O.
218
00:11:09,951 --> 00:11:12,261
If you hit the Men's Diaper
Brigade you've gone too far.
219
00:11:12,265 --> 00:11:13,662
-See you there.
-Okay.
220
00:11:17,512 --> 00:11:18,444
What's this?
221
00:11:18,832 --> 00:11:19,958
The food's all green.
222
00:11:19,983 --> 00:11:21,264
I added a little food color.
223
00:11:21,453 --> 00:11:22,712
It's artistic.
224
00:11:22,871 --> 00:11:24,094
I'm being artistic.
225
00:11:24,160 --> 00:11:24,937
Mom's right.
226
00:11:24,959 --> 00:11:28,841
I always thought art was just stupid paintings
of old dead guys in drag, but I was wrong.
227
00:11:28,996 --> 00:11:32,026
Art can be doing something,
or even undoing something.
228
00:11:32,238 --> 00:11:35,541
Like when I blew up the Muller's mailbox,
that was art, and I didn't even know it.
229
00:11:35,600 --> 00:11:38,396
Green eggs and toast.
I do not like green eggs and toast.
230
00:11:38,435 --> 00:11:40,649
Oh, for God's sake, Hal, stretch a little.
231
00:11:40,760 --> 00:11:41,809
We're on vacation.
232
00:11:41,842 --> 00:11:42,934
Vacation?!
233
00:11:43,238 --> 00:11:44,930
Which part of this is vacation?
234
00:11:45,110 --> 00:11:49,818
Armor-Alling the tires for six hours,
or scraping the dead bugs out of the grill with a toothbrush?
235
00:11:50,033 --> 00:11:52,421
Why do they have to play
Frisbee so close to the RV?
236
00:11:52,438 --> 00:11:55,642
Can't they have fun with that thing
without constantly throwing it around?
237
00:11:55,721 --> 00:11:56,595
And where's Malcolm?
238
00:11:56,666 --> 00:11:58,277
Did he even come home last night?
239
00:11:58,572 --> 00:12:01,274
I gotta tell you, Lois, I really
don't think I like this place.
240
00:12:01,958 --> 00:12:03,473
I think I love this place.
241
00:12:06,348 --> 00:12:07,610
No, I'm sure I do.
242
00:12:07,771 --> 00:12:08,703
Good morning.
243
00:12:08,839 --> 00:12:12,431
Did you know... you are the most
incredible woman who ever lived?
244
00:12:12,827 --> 00:12:17,060
Well, I knew I was in the top three.
But I guess your vote clinches it.
245
00:12:18,678 --> 00:12:20,717
So, are we going to spend the day together?
246
00:12:21,419 --> 00:12:23,351
I thought we could go check
out the Circle of Infinity...
247
00:12:23,371 --> 00:12:26,019
Oh, I have a ton of re-birthing
ceremonies to do today.
248
00:12:26,021 --> 00:12:27,904
But we can get together later.
How about that?
249
00:12:28,175 --> 00:12:29,718
Sure, that sounds great.
250
00:12:31,175 --> 00:12:32,059
What's the matter?
251
00:12:32,788 --> 00:12:33,433
Nothing.
252
00:12:33,704 --> 00:12:34,558
I'm happy.
253
00:12:34,828 --> 00:12:35,740
Really, really happy.
254
00:12:35,760 --> 00:12:39,381
No, there's something the matter,
but I just can't pin it down.
255
00:12:39,397 --> 00:12:40,386
Nothing's wrong.
256
00:12:40,493 --> 00:12:42,959
You go do your re-birthing whatevers,
and we'll get together later.
257
00:12:43,195 --> 00:12:44,717
Contempt. That's it.
258
00:12:44,775 --> 00:12:45,688
What are you talking about?
259
00:12:45,728 --> 00:12:47,554
You have contempt for me, and for what I do.
260
00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:49,250
No, no, not at all.
261
00:12:49,661 --> 00:12:52,069
I should really just keep my mouth
shut for the next five seconds.
262
00:12:52,451 --> 00:12:53,813
Four, three...
263
00:12:54,652 --> 00:12:58,361
I mean, it is a pretty silly ritual, but
I guess I don't see any real harm in it.
264
00:12:58,793 --> 00:13:01,531
You know, I have a lot to do today
and I think you should probably go.
265
00:13:01,627 --> 00:13:02,885
-No...
-Good-bye, Malcolm.
266
00:13:13,889 --> 00:13:15,850
This guy's really captured something here.
267
00:13:16,456 --> 00:13:18,806
This piece is as vicious as it is funny.
268
00:13:19,641 --> 00:13:21,797
What are you looking at?!
269
00:13:21,835 --> 00:13:25,806
Haven't you ever seen a man sweep
his lawn with a broom before?
270
00:13:28,171 --> 00:13:29,777
Okay, that's enough. I've had it.
271
00:13:29,780 --> 00:13:31,289
Go on, get out of here, you punks.
272
00:13:39,284 --> 00:13:41,750
What the hell is wrong with you people?!
273
00:13:41,988 --> 00:13:45,230
Doesn't anybody have respect
for personal property anymore?
274
00:13:46,424 --> 00:13:50,114
You can think about that for a few
days until I give this back to you.
275
00:14:02,629 --> 00:14:04,993
I bet orphanages don't take family trips.
276
00:14:05,506 --> 00:14:07,370
Or kids raised by animals.
277
00:14:08,096 --> 00:14:09,708
How come they get all the breaks?
278
00:14:15,213 --> 00:14:17,096
Okay, Lois, you can open your eyes now.
279
00:14:20,852 --> 00:14:21,881
Oh, my gosh.
280
00:14:21,905 --> 00:14:23,519
This is fantastic.
281
00:14:23,790 --> 00:14:27,829
Oh... I wish there was a JC Penney
nearby. I'd love to get wallets of this.
282
00:14:29,490 --> 00:14:31,311
Who's stupid idea was it
to come here, anyway?
283
00:14:31,370 --> 00:14:32,574
I'm with you, Malcolm.
284
00:14:32,907 --> 00:14:34,033
We don't belong here.
285
00:14:34,440 --> 00:14:37,100
This place is full of freaks and weirdoes.
286
00:14:37,506 --> 00:14:40,923
And now your mother and Jamie are out
there with them, doing God knows what.
287
00:14:42,480 --> 00:14:44,733
You're going to be okay, Malcolm,
because you are just like me.
288
00:14:45,730 --> 00:14:46,885
-I am?
-Well, sure.
289
00:14:46,931 --> 00:14:50,536
They say we're stubborn, they say
we're closed-minded, but I say there's
290
00:14:50,537 --> 00:14:54,545
nothing closed-minded about shunning ideas
that make you scared and uncomfortable.
291
00:14:55,484 --> 00:14:56,059
Yeah.
292
00:14:56,073 --> 00:14:58,542
And who cares if they
say we're afraid of life?
293
00:14:58,567 --> 00:15:00,392
Life is scary.
294
00:15:00,717 --> 00:15:03,047
Life is things eating things.
295
00:15:03,409 --> 00:15:06,574
I say let everyone out there
go ahead and eat each other.
296
00:15:07,934 --> 00:15:11,719
You and I we're gonna be in
here together, safe and sound.
297
00:15:16,609 --> 00:15:17,901
I've been a total idiot.
298
00:15:18,245 --> 00:15:19,332
I've got to get over myself.
299
00:15:19,402 --> 00:15:20,159
Where are you going?
300
00:15:20,529 --> 00:15:23,306
Don't walk away from me when
I'm talking to you, young man!
301
00:15:32,362 --> 00:15:35,954
Get... off... my... property!
302
00:15:50,076 --> 00:15:51,377
What? What did I do?
303
00:15:53,184 --> 00:15:55,452
-Come with us.
-Wait. I want my lawyer.
304
00:15:55,487 --> 00:15:57,048
He's the naked guy in the buffalo head.
305
00:15:57,060 --> 00:15:59,058
It's okay, Reese, you're not in any trouble.
306
00:15:59,233 --> 00:16:02,184
We want you to be the torchbearer
for the big Burning Man ceremony.
307
00:16:02,565 --> 00:16:04,217
-You do?
-Absolutely.
308
00:16:04,293 --> 00:16:08,567
I can't think of anyone who has
embraced and embodied the spirit of the festival more than you have.
309
00:16:08,670 --> 00:16:09,483
Really?
310
00:16:10,196 --> 00:16:11,050
Wow.
311
00:16:12,504 --> 00:16:14,839
Hey, don't say anything to my lawyer, okay?
312
00:16:14,975 --> 00:16:16,373
I don't want to have to
give him a piece of this.
313
00:16:18,295 --> 00:16:21,692
Open yourselves to the
energy of re-birthing.
314
00:16:39,358 --> 00:16:40,232
I can do this.
315
00:16:40,569 --> 00:16:41,831
I can be open-minded.
316
00:16:42,082 --> 00:16:43,216
So it's a little weird.
317
00:16:43,462 --> 00:16:45,132
Most rituals are a little weird, right?
318
00:16:48,253 --> 00:16:50,292
He really needs a fresh start.
319
00:16:50,465 --> 00:16:52,601
We made a lot of mistakes his first two days.
320
00:16:54,550 --> 00:16:56,414
Okay, so it's totally insane.
321
00:16:56,941 --> 00:16:58,688
I don't care, I'm doing it.
322
00:17:11,578 --> 00:17:14,471
I got to tell you, man,
you've been fantastic.
323
00:17:14,530 --> 00:17:15,229
Thanks.
324
00:17:16,904 --> 00:17:17,656
What's this for?
325
00:17:17,686 --> 00:17:20,991
What's it for? It's to set him on fire.
326
00:17:22,104 --> 00:17:22,764
What?!
327
00:17:23,226 --> 00:17:26,197
That's how we end Burning Man,
man, by burning the man.
328
00:17:26,227 --> 00:17:27,212
But it can't end.
329
00:17:27,343 --> 00:17:28,391
I don't want it to.
330
00:17:28,761 --> 00:17:31,706
For my first time in my life
I've been real, like I belong.
331
00:17:31,723 --> 00:17:34,363
We've all been there, man.
But it still has to end.
332
00:17:34,530 --> 00:17:35,539
But why?
333
00:17:35,615 --> 00:17:37,130
That's just the way it is.
334
00:17:37,159 --> 00:17:38,923
Look, it's cool if you don't want to...
335
00:17:39,308 --> 00:17:40,182
Get back!
336
00:17:40,225 --> 00:17:43,041
Everyone just stay back!
No one's burning Burning Man!
337
00:17:56,693 --> 00:17:57,547
Malcolm?
338
00:17:58,318 --> 00:17:59,211
What are you doing here?
339
00:17:59,265 --> 00:18:01,284
I did it. I actually did it.
340
00:18:01,430 --> 00:18:03,032
You re-birthed yourself...
341
00:18:03,440 --> 00:18:04,572
-For me?
-No.
342
00:18:04,928 --> 00:18:07,549
Well, yeah, originally, but
something happened in there.
343
00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:11,171
I mean, I was able to open my mind and be
accepting of something I didn't believe in.
344
00:18:11,545 --> 00:18:13,245
I've never been able to do that before.
345
00:18:13,525 --> 00:18:16,174
It's amazing, I actually
feel like I've been reborn.
346
00:18:16,370 --> 00:18:17,497
It feels fantastic.
347
00:18:17,924 --> 00:18:19,109
And it's all thanks to you.
348
00:18:19,183 --> 00:18:20,267
Oh, Malcolm.
349
00:18:21,238 --> 00:18:22,772
We can never see each other again.
350
00:18:23,949 --> 00:18:25,201
-What?
-This can never work.
351
00:18:25,205 --> 00:18:26,606
You're just way to manuable.
352
00:18:26,702 --> 00:18:28,690
The condescending cynic,
I could deal with, but this...
353
00:18:29,041 --> 00:18:31,643
I don't want you doing things just
because I want you to do them.
354
00:18:31,924 --> 00:18:33,623
Then I won't. If that's what you want.
355
00:18:34,653 --> 00:18:35,469
Crap.
356
00:18:35,637 --> 00:18:36,627
I'm sorry, Malcolm.
357
00:18:36,680 --> 00:18:39,302
Life is a journey at you
have to take on your own.
358
00:18:39,359 --> 00:18:41,217
I've tried my own journey. It's sucks.
359
00:18:41,412 --> 00:18:43,310
Please, please, please,
just take me with you.
360
00:18:43,671 --> 00:18:45,101
I don't take up a lot of space.
361
00:18:45,127 --> 00:18:46,479
-You have to go now.
-But...
362
00:18:48,981 --> 00:18:49,933
Great.
363
00:18:50,228 --> 00:18:52,500
Who knew this life could be
even crappier than the last one?
364
00:18:55,036 --> 00:18:55,930
Stay back!
365
00:18:56,037 --> 00:18:57,649
Stay back! I mean it!
366
00:19:03,785 --> 00:19:05,513
Get in the van, Reese. We're going home.
367
00:19:05,546 --> 00:19:06,827
Dad, you gotta help me.
368
00:19:06,883 --> 00:19:08,588
They want me to burn Burning Man.
369
00:19:08,598 --> 00:19:11,751
Oh, for crying out loud, just torch
the bastard and we're out of here.
370
00:19:11,866 --> 00:19:12,701
I'm ready.
371
00:19:12,779 --> 00:19:15,167
I finally got your precious floor mats clean.
372
00:19:15,225 --> 00:19:17,245
-Let's get the hell out of here.
-Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
373
00:19:17,605 --> 00:19:21,352
Are you insane? You're not going into
my beautiful van looking like that.
374
00:19:21,506 --> 00:19:22,140
Hey!
375
00:19:22,225 --> 00:19:24,050
Here come the Trumpet Strumpets.
376
00:19:24,265 --> 00:19:26,051
Let's burn the man!
377
00:19:46,862 --> 00:19:47,557
Reese.
378
00:19:48,051 --> 00:19:50,264
You behave yourself,
young man. You hear me?
379
00:19:52,469 --> 00:19:53,914
You look incredible, honey.
380
00:19:54,197 --> 00:19:55,265
Now get in the van.
381
00:19:55,741 --> 00:19:57,770
-No! No, please!
-Burning Man! Burning Man!
382
00:19:57,864 --> 00:19:59,417
Burning Man! Burning Man!
383
00:19:59,392 --> 00:20:02,765
-No! Please, no!
-Burning Man! Burning Man!
384
00:20:03,290 --> 00:20:06,556
-No, no! Burning Man can't end.
-Burning Man! Burning Man!
385
00:20:06,983 --> 00:20:08,206
I won't let it!
386
00:20:25,998 --> 00:20:29,915
Burning van! Burning van!
387
00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:32,041
Burning van! Burning van!
388
00:20:32,120 --> 00:20:36,831
Burning van! Burning van...
389
00:20:41,819 --> 00:20:44,440
I still can't believe how
awesome Burning Man was.
390
00:20:44,828 --> 00:20:46,672
Next year we're totally going back, right?
391
00:20:46,673 --> 00:20:47,799
Totally.
392
00:20:49,427 --> 00:20:52,397
Okay, so Burning Man didn't turn
out as great as I thought it would.
393
00:20:52,613 --> 00:20:54,850
But I think I'll get over it
a lot faster than Dad will.
394
00:20:55,315 --> 00:20:57,163
His boss really loved that RV.
395
00:20:57,481 --> 00:20:58,685
Don't wait up.
396
00:20:59,146 --> 00:21:01,496
I probably won't be home until dawn again.
397
00:21:01,525 --> 00:21:03,797
Tonight I'm digging him a new septic tank.
398
00:21:04,473 --> 00:21:05,366
Come on, Dewey.
399
00:21:05,521 --> 00:21:07,657
First we gotta relocate the pet cemetery.
400
00:21:07,707 --> 00:21:12,257
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