All language subtitles for MSW s06e06 Dead Letter.eng

And you gave him the letter?

But I had no idea
what was in it.

FEMALE NARRATOR:
Tonight on Murder, She Wrote.

People get late mail
all the time.

It hardly ever kills them.

Yeah? So what makes you
think it was arson?

It's always arson.

Your insurance company
hounded me.

Fred, he's having
a little trouble, yeah,

but it's nothing
he can't handle.

Come on now, boys, fess up.

Which of you has a tender spot
in his heart for little Lois?

A gentleman never tells.

Someday that lousy
temper of yours is gonna get you killed.

(PEOPLE CHATTERING)

(BELL CLANGING)

MAN: Leave your sister alone,
now, Anna.

Both of you, look over here.
I'm gonna take your picture.

That's about all
that old fire engine's good for these days,

something for the kids
to climb on.

Isn't it funny how they
like to play fireman?

Not me.

I always liked
to play doctor.

Took my first appendix out
when I was six years old.

Oh, Seth.

VENDOR: Come and get it.
Quench your thirst with homemade lemonade.

Come and get it.
Quench your thirst with homemade lemonade.

Homemade lemonade here.

SAM: Now this
is more like it.

CARL: State-of-the-art
and fully equipped.

And she's got a siren
that'll peel the paint off of a red barn.

It's a dilly.
Now, is our new engine gonna look like this?

Bigger.
No.

Oh, yeah!
Oh!

Not quite as new, though,
Mr. Mayor.

But she will throw
more than 800 gallons per minute.

I can't wait.

Meantime, I'm going
to buy this one for my office.

Some of the bigger kids
still like to play fireman, too.

You know, Seth,
the crowd seems thinner than last year, though.

Not to mention
the pickings.

These golf clubs look as
if they last saw action during the Korean War.

Make that World War I.

Oh, hello, Lois.

Jessica! Dr. Hazlitt.
Hello.

What do you think
of the rummage sale?

Well...

It's a good day for it.

Oh, it's a lovely day
for it.

SETH: Where's Bud?

Oh, he's hard at work.

He's in charge of
second-hand furniture.

Oh!

You know, I wonder
if he would have a small bureau.

Oh, I'm sure he does.
I saw a couple of them over there.

I could do with one
for my guest room.

If you'll excuse me,
I'll just go take a look.

If it's on par with
the rest of this stuff, there's no need to run.

Lois. I thought
you'd like a lemonade.

Why, thank you, Ron.

That's very considerate
of you.

It's my pleasure.

There it is. Perfect.

Well, beauty is obviously
in the eyes of the beholder.

Well, I see what you mean.

It needs a lot of work,
but it is the right size.

STANLEY: I could help you
strip that down, Jessica.

(CHUCKLING) Why, Stanley!
I didn't see you there. How are you?

Well, I'm better than I was,
and not as good as I'm gonna be.

Hello, Doc.
SETH: Stanley.

You looking for bargains
down there, too?

Well, one of my hobbies
is fixing up fixer-uppers.

I don't know.
Do you think that this has possibilities?

Hmm.

We're not exactly talking
Chippendales, are we?

But, you know,

a couple of applications
of my secret formula,

we could have it looking
like an antique.

Stanley, you missed
your calling.

You should've gone into
furniture refinishing instead of accounting.

(CHUCKLES)
Maybe I will someday.

You know, you should
snap this up, Jessica.

$50. Don't tell Bud,
but that's a steal.

I'll grab it myself
if you don't.

Well, consider it sold.

Now, if I can find Bud,
I'll give him a check.

BUD: Carl Wilson,
you're a liar and a thief!

Looks like you found him.

You knew that
that printing shop was gonna make money

before you bought
my half of it!

It made money because
I bought your half.

And at a good price, too!

And you already had
those customers lined up, didn't you?

You lost those customers

because of your
penny-pinching ways.

And they all came back
after you left.

You don't know anything
about ethics.

And you don't know anything
about running a business.

Carl, you bilked me
real good,

and I'm not gonna
forget it!

Honey, honey, honey,
he gave us what we asked for.

Why are you always
taking sides against me?

I thought a wife was supposed
to stand behind a husband.

SAM: Ladies and gentlemen,
your attention, please!

(BELL CLANGING)

Children, move along, now.

It's time for the highlight
of the afternoon.

A drill by the Cabot Cove
Volunteer Fire Department.

(PEOPLE CHEERING)

This is an exciting
opportunity

to see our brave lads
in action.

This is an exciting
opportunity

to see our brave lads
in action.

(PEOPLE CHATTERING)

(CLANGING)

Well, come on, boys!
Fire bell's ringing!

Well, did I tell you that
this bed comes equipped

with the world's finest
mattress set?

I have got one just like it.
I wouldn't sleep on anything else.

Oh, I don't know.
Well, it's not exactly what we had in mind.

Okay, I tell you what.

Now, I am partial
to young folks just starting out.

So I'm gonna make
a special one-time discount of

$30. What do you say?

Well, $30 could...
I don't know.

Listen, suppose I let you
sit down right here

and take a few minutes
and just think about it.

Jessica, don't tell me.
You've finally decided to get rid of that old sofa?

Not as long as I can
still make slipcovers.

Actually, Fred,
I came to see you about the rummage sale.

Oh, well, the mayor
already told me how much we raised.

It was exactly $2,600.13.

Well, actually, $2,650.13.

I bought a small bureau,

but Bud Fricksey
left in a huff before I could pay him.

And since you're
the treasurer of the fund,

I thought I'd bring
the check to you.

Well, see, I have got
this young couple

sniffing around that
God-awful bedroom set

that I got stuck with
last year.

So, why don't you take
that check in to Stanley

and let him give you
a receipt? Oh, all right.

Oh, and thank you,
Jessica.

(CHUCKLING) You're welcome.

All right,

$35 discount,
my final offer.

What do you say?

(TAPPING)
Uh-huh. Well, I...

I showed... I showed
your bill to Fred,

and he said it just
skipped his mind.

Yeah, well, Fred writes
all the checks around here,

and he said he'd shoot one
right out to you.

I'll see that you get it,
hand-delivered first thing in the morning.

Yeah, nice to talk
to you, too, Mr. Phelps.

Beside doing the books here,
I'm the chief diplomat.

Well, I didn't come here
to get a check, Stanley,

I came here to
give you a check

for that small bureau
that I bought at the rummage sale.

Oh, that's right,
that's right.

Bud Fricksey
never did come back after he stomped out.

I don't know how
that man can live

with that self-righteous
temper.

I'll get you
a receipt here.

Oh, my.

What a lovely photograph
of Marjorie.

That's my future
you're holding.

Yes, I understand
you two are engaged.

Have you set the date?

Soon as I can get
some time off.

The way things are
going around here,

I'm not sure when
that's gonna be.

Is something wrong?

Nothing to trouble you with.

You're gonna be very happy
with the little bureau you bought.

Just come on by my place,
and I'll give you some of my secret stripping mixture.

Thanks, Stanley.

(SIGHS)

(SETH CHUCKLING)

SETH: Well, it is too big
for a planter.

Well, it's got nice,
wide drawers.

Oh, it's stuck!

Here, let me have
a look at it.

(GRUNTING)

I wouldn't put
my socks in there.

You'd never get them out.

Oh, no wonder it was stuck.

There's something
wedged in here.

A letter! Addressed
to Bud Fricksey!

Postmarked Boston
six months ago.

Never even been opened.
How do you suppose it got in there?

Well, there's no
return address.

This looks like
a woman's handwriting.

Uh-huh!

And what is that
supposed to mean?

Well, Bud is
a married man.

Oh, for heaven's sakes.
This could have come from a bank.

With no return address?

Now that sounds more like
a savings and loan.

What are you
gonna do with it?

Well, it's pretty late,

but I suppose I better
give it to Bud Fricksey.

I'd be careful, Jess.

If that's an unpaid bill,
he'll not thank you.

I know mail service is bad,
but this is rotten.

I mean, looks like it's
been through a wringer.

Where did you say
you got this?

Well, I found it
in this old bureau

that I bought at
the rummage sale.

That's very weird.

Bud?

What?

I'm sorry. I hope
it's not bad news.

No.

No, it's nothing
that I can't handle.

Please excuse me, Jessica.
I've got things to take care of.

(DOOR CLOSES)

I just can't get
the hang of this.

Here, let me help.

You can let go of
my hand now, Ron.

Oh, yeah. Sorry.

Its okay, Ron.
No need to be sorry.

I didn't take any offense.

It's just I'm not very good
with mechanical things.

Bud says I'm real clumsy,
not much good for anything.

Yeah, well, Bud ought to
get his head examined.

Thanks, Ron.
I guess I'm just a slow learner.

Thank you.
Get in the car!

Bud!
I said get in the car!

Bud, what are you,
crazy?

Don't you
argue with me!

Get in the car,
and you drive home! You listen to me!

Hey, Bud, wait.
What's the matter with you?

You think I don't know
what's going on here?

How'd you like it
if I ripped this place apart?

Well, I'd like it just fine.
I'd go fishing.

But my old man
who owns the place would be a little bit sore.

Bud, I don't know
what you're thinking...

I told you to drive home.
Now, get in the car and drive!

(DOOR SLAMS)

What's your problem?

I'm warning you, Stiller.
You stay away from my wife.

You're crazy.
Go home and sober up.

You listen to me, Bud.

Someday that lousy
temper of yours is gonna get you killed.

And I'll tell you
something else.

If you ever grab me
like that again,

I'll be the one that does it.

You go near my wife,
and I'm telling you,

it's gonna be me
that's doing the killing.

And you count on it!

SAM: We've got a big decision
to make here tonight, folks.

And what big decision
is that, Mr. Mayor?

We've got to pick
a new Fire Chief.

What's the matter with
the old Fire Chief?

I think that Carl Wilson
has done a fine job.

Yeah, and he's
a great guy.

Now hold on!

I didn't say a word
against Carl.

I want him to stay,
but he's got some crazy idea.

He wants to devote
more time to his family.

All I can say is
it's a good thing

some of us aren't
that selfish.

Do you happen to have
another candidate in mind, Sam?

Well, as a matter of fact...

Forget it, Sam.

You're already
spreading yourself too thin on this one job.

Hey, what about Adele?
She taught fire training in the Marines.

Adele? Your wife?

Oh, I don't know about that.

I think it's a wonderful idea.

Why shouldn't the Fire Chief
be a woman?

No, no, wait a second.
I withdraw the nomination.

I just thought.

I don't want my wife
hanging around

a firehouse all day
playing pinochle.

Good point.

(BELL CLANGING)

That's the fire alarm!
Oh, my!

I can't see anything.

Maybe it's
a false alarm.

This is the Mayor.
Where's the fire? I'm on my way.

Fred Owens' furniture store
is up in flames.

Better hurry if you
don't wanna miss it.

(SIREN WAILING)

CARL: Get all these people
back from here.

(PEOPLE CLAMORING)

FLOYD: Move back, folks.
Come on.

Move back!

Nothing else to see here.
It's all over. Go on home.

Okay, boys.
Let's go inside with the fire extinguishers.

This always happened to me,
even as a kid.

Soon as I'd get there,
the fire'd be out.

Next time, have them
notify in advance.

Oh, good idea.
Funny, Doc. Very funny.

Well, looks like they
made it here in time.

The building doesn't
seem to be very damaged.

Though it's strange.
I don't see Fred Owens. You'd think he'd be here.

(MEN YELLING)

CARL: Cover every inch
of this place. Get the hot spots.

Chief! In here!

My God!
Somebody was in here.

CARL: Bud Fricksey!

Doc, you'd better
get in here!

Yeah.

(MAN CHATTERING ON RADIO)

Too late.

Smoke inhalation.

Must have been
trapped by the fire.

Yeah.

Yes, but what
was he doing here?

Dispatcher said it was Bud
who phoned in the alarm.

Here's his extinguisher.

His car's outside.

Probably spotted the flames,
sounded the alarm and rushed in here

to fight the fire himself.

Without even his helmet.

He was the best we had.

Why, if it weren't
for this fine, courageous man,

the whole town
could have burned down.

We owe Bud Fricksey
our very lives.

He was a great hero.

And the Mayor wants
to put a statue of him next to the firehouse

and re-dedicate
the fire engine fund in his name.

FLOYD: Well,
that's a great honor.

METZGER: Yeah, but
what a crummy way to die.

Snuffed out by
spontaneous combustion.

That wasn't spontaneous
combustion, Sheriff. That was arson.

Oh, is that so?

Connie Kowalski,
Mutual Fidelity Insurance.

Thanks. Already got
a piece of the rock.

I'm a claims investigator,
Sheriff, not an agent.

Yeah? So what makes
you think it was arson?

It's always arson.

I've already sent some things
to my Boston lab for analysis,

including several cushions
with some very suspicious stains.

Hold it, honey.

Are you telling me
you removed evidence?

That you didn't spot.

But you gotta know
what to look for,

and that's a job
for an expert.

Oh, and I suppose that's you?

Take a look at these.

Notice how all the records
in the office have been destroyed?

The charred
filing cabinets.

Well, she's got a point
there, Sheriff.

You burn the evidence.
You hide the motive.

I've investigated
dozens of these.

You've botched this one
so far, buddy boy,

but I'm gonna
clear it up for you.

Look, sweetie-pie,
this is my town.

And if there's gonna be
an investigation,

I'll run it my way.

Don't think you can just
waltz in here and take over.

Look, Metzger,
I've got work to do.

I don't have time to
stand around listening to your dumb speeches,

'cause I'm gonna be
too busy

trying to save your fanny.

Unless you'd like to
come along to help?

Hey, wait a... Wait a...

Did you hear...

Wait a minute!

Hey! Don't touch that.

That's evidence,
and this is a fire scene!

CONNIE: What are you
doing here?

What's your name, mister?

Fred Owens.

He's the owner
of the place.

Oh, yeah.

Well, Connie Kowalski,
Mutual Fidelity Insurance.

Gee, Fred, somebody
did a real good job here.

It started over there
and there,

probably fueled by
gasoline or kerosene.

I'll know better
in a couple of hours.

And I know you don't
know a thing about it,

but just for the record,
where were you last night?

Well, I...
Hold it!

This happens to be
a prominent citizen.

A pillar of the community.

Now, you can't
just come in here and badger him like this.

Thank you, Sheriff.

Okay, so where were you
last night, Fred?

I was out of town.
I had a business meeting.

You got a hotel receipt
to prove that?

No.

(STAMMERING) You see,
halfway to Augusta,

I discovered that
I'd forgotten my briefcase,

so then I had to come back.

Imagine that.

Is there anyone
who can vouch for that?

Um...

Well, I was alone.

Come on, Fred.

Only fire in the past year,
it's your place,

and you just happen
to be out of town?

Don't you think that's
a little suspicious?

And another thing,
maybe nobody told you.

A man died in the fire.

Stanley?

METZGER: No. Bud Fricksey.

Bud is dead?

Oh, that's awful.

And if what this lady
says is true,

if it was arson,

that means it was also
second-degree murder.

Lf?

Without my arson,
you got nothing, buddy boy.

Well, you are
absolutely wrong.

My business was
in wonderful shape.

Why, last week alone,
I sold three bedroom sets.

Well, that's real interesting,

but you know what's
even more interesting?

You recently doubled
your coverage.

Because your insurance company
hounded me to death.

Day and night,
phone calls, letters,

they would not
leave me alone!

"Adjust for inflation,"
they said.

So I did it.

And now, all of a sudden,
I am a criminal.

Oh, sir. Sir, please.

Really, there's no need
to become abusive.

I'm only here
to get the facts.

And if you've got
nothing to hide,

then there should
be no problem.

No problem at all.

SETH: Jess, there are times
when I think that you won't be satisfied

till you prove that
everybody in the cemetery

was a victim of foul play.

But don't you think
it's a bit coincidental

that the very day
I give Bud a dead letter,

he wound up dead?

Well, the letter had
nothing to do with it. It couldn't be simpler.

Man sees fire.

Man tries to fight fire.
Man dies.

Now that is all
there is to it.

(SIGHS)

I wish I could
believe that.

Oh, for pity's sake, Jess.

People get late mail
all the time.

It very seldom kills them.

Tuesday, I got
four postcards

my cousin Willie
sent from Paris.

And cousin Willie has
been home in Skowhegan for six weeks.

Oh, you're right, Seth.

I'm making entirely
too much of this.

I wonder where that
bureau came from.

AGNES: You bet I'm enjoying
my retirement.

I got so much to do

I don't know how I found time
to work in the post office.

(LAUGHS)

Well, it hasn't been
the same without you, Agnes,

and that's for sure.

Well, I know.
They brought it up to date.

All new furnishings.

Not like that old stuff that
I had to bring from home.

Including the small bureau?

Yeah.

I heard you bought that
at the rummage sale.

I was almost ashamed
to give it to them,

it was in such bad shape.

You know,
I found an envelope,

a letter that wedged
in the drawer.

Well, that's why
it wouldn't close.

I thought it was warped.

Maybe you remember it,
Agnes.

It was addressed
to Bud Fricksey in a woman's handwriting.

It must have been mailed
six months ago.

I near forgot about it.

Now, the fact is
that Lois Fricksey

wrote that letter
when she was visiting her sister in Boston.

Now, there's something
right up your alley, Jessica.

In what way, Agnes?

It's a real mystery.

No sooner did
that letter arrive,

than Lois was on the phone,

saying she had
second thoughts.

Begged me to tear it up.

Well, you couldn't do that.

Postal regulations.

Course, there was
nothing to say

that I couldn't file it
in my own private little

dead letter office.

LOIS: The minute I put
the letter in the mailbox,

I knew I shouldn't have
written it.

I thought Agnes
destroyed it months ago.

I'm surprised that you
didn't ask her about it.

I was too embarrassed.

I went to stay with
my sister in Boston

because my marriage
was going sour. I...

I sorted things out,
and I came to a decision.

I couldn't tell Bud about it.
I couldn't even telephone him.

I... I thought a letter would
be the best way to say it.

I told him...

I told him I didn't
love him anymore,

that there was another man.

Oh, I see.

(SIGHS)

I told him this other man

was patient, kind,

understanding, generous.

Everything that Bud wasn't.

Thank goodness
he never read it.

Lois, I...
I'm so sorry,

but, you see,
when I found the letter,

I had no way of knowing
what was in it.

And, well,

it was addressed
to Bud, so, uh,

I went to see him.

And you gave him the letter?

But I had no idea
what was in it.

And then,
when he opened it...

You saw him read it?

When was this?

It was the day after
the rummage sale.

Well, now I understand his
erratic, crazy behavior at the gas station.

He was in a jealous rage.

He must have been
spying on me.

I am so sorry.

If I'd known...

No, no, Jessica.
It's not your fault.

It's a stupid mistake
I made months ago that's come back to haunt me.

It's just so humiliating.

Well, I'm glad no one else
knows about it.

If Bud didn't tell you that
I'd given him the letter...

He didn't.

Well, then, where is it?

Yeah, I found the letter
in his pocket,

but you can forget about
keeping it private.

Oh, but, Sheriff...

I mean, making
the contents public

doesn't serve
any useful purpose.

Might help find
that other fellow Lois was writing about.

Well, for what
earthly reason?

Well, check out
this storyline.

Bud knows who's playing
pat-a-cake with his wife,

and he goes gunning
for the guy.

Now, loverboy doesn't like
the idea of being killed by a jealous husband,

so he strikes first.

There's something that
you two haven't told me.

Bud's death had nothing
to do with the fire, Jess.

The coroner says
he was killed by a severe blow to the head.

And Lois Fricksey's letter
tells us exactly where to look for the killer.

Yeah.

Seems her mysterious
boyfriend

is a member of
the Volunteer Fire Department.

Oh, come on,
Mrs. Fricksey.

I'm not asking you for
the name of your hairdresser!

I'm looking for the guy
who punched out your husband's lights.

I'm sorry, Sheriff.

I can't tell you his name.
It just wouldn't be fair.

Fair?

Ma'am, we're talking
murder here.

And if you don't tell me
who the guy is,

I will give you
a personal tour of the Cabot Cove clink.

Lois, the Sheriff
didn't really mean that,

not exactly.

I'm sorry, Jessica.

I can't help you.

Please don't ask me.

Your friend,

this man that you mentioned
in your letter to Bud,

maybe he was upset
when you returned to your husband.

I mean, isn't that
a reasonable assumption?

Yes. Yes, I suppose so.

I mean, maybe he thought
that he'd have a better chance with you

if Bud was no longer
in the way.

(STAMMERING) No, Jessica.

He couldn't possibly
do a thing like that.

I mean, Bud was capable
of hurting him,

but he could never
have hurt Bud.

I mean, he's muscular
and strong, but he's...

He's sensitive and caring,

and he's dedicated
to peace and nonviolence.

Good, because Bud wasn't hit
by Winnie the Pooh.

One whack and his
immortal soul

went through the pearly gates
and onto the heavenly green.

(SOBBING)

Now what did I say?

I was not
putting down women.

I just said I never
questioned a man

who turned on the sniffles.

Sheriff,

someone waiting
to see you.

Well, Metzger!

Gee, it's about time
you showed up.

Must be nice being
a small-town sheriff,

nothing to do but goof off.

Oh, yeah, yeah,
that's about it,

except for trying
to catch a killer.

Turns out our
dead fireman was murdered.

Am I supposed to be surprised?

Pardon me, we haven't met.
I'm Jessica Fletcher.

Oh, yeah! Oh, I've heard
a lot about you, Jessica,

but I'm not intimidated.
Connie Kowalski, Mutual Fidelity.

Sheriff Metzger tells me
that you're looking for evidence of arson?

Wrong. I found it.

Remember those stains
on the pillows?

Lab says they were benzine.

METZGER:
Oh, yeah?

Well, then, I suppose
you're both looking for the same person.

Wrong MO.
Arsonists don't kill.

What about the killer
who covers the murder with a fire?

Oh, come on, get real.

This is a classic case.

I mean, the business
goes bust,

businessman goes for a torch.

Yes, but that
hasn't been proven.

And it still
doesn't explain

why a dead body
was found at the scene.

Well, that's not my problem.

Look, no offense,
but I'll go my way,

and the Sheriff from
Flatbush can go his,

and we'll see
who can make a case.

You're on, lady!

You don't know who
you're dealing with here.

No? Metzger,
there's a cop just like you

grabbing free apples off
of every fruit stand in Brooklyn.

CONNIE: See you.

Did you hear that?

Can't make a case
out of it?

(LAUGHS)

What am I laughing for?
I can't make a case out of it.

I mean, I got nothing.
I got the widow Fricksey,

who's got a boyfriend,
identity unknown,

who is a member of
the Volunteer Fire Department.

And the fire was
started with benzine.

And the fire was started
with benzine.

So what does that give me?

Well, now let's think.

Now, where would we
find benzine?

Didn't Lois say something
about Bud's jealous rage in a gas station?

Sure, that's it!
That's my case.

A gas station.

And which volunteer fireman
runs a gas station?

Ron Stiller.

Sorry, Sheriff,
he's not here.

Not here?

This is Saturday afternoon.
Where is he?

His cousin said he was
called to the firehouse.

An important meeting
or something.

(MEN LAUGHING)

RON: Here's your two dollars
and I'll raise you two.

AARON: Too much for me.
EVERETT: I'm out.

JACK: Me, too.

Nine-high straight.

(ALL EXCLAIMING)

RON: Flush.

(ALL LAUGH)

Like I was saying, boys,
it's one of us.

I mean, one of you.

Lois Fricksey's boyfriend
is a fireman.

(ALL EXCLAIM)

You gotta be kidding.

Whoever told you that's
a dirty-minded liar.

Mort Metzger told me.

Come on now, boys, fess up.

Which of you has a tender spot
in his heart for little Lois?

A gentleman never tells.

Me, neither.
Don't look at me.

I'm a happily married man.

(ALL LAUGHING)

Who dealt this mess?

Jacks or better to open.

Check.
I open for 50 cents.

Well, now let's see.

Who is Lois' type?

Well, there's sure
nobody here like Bud.

Thank the Lord.

She'd probably want to have
somebody different, anyhow.

Nobody here more
different than Sam.

(ALL LAUGHING)

Bite your tongue,
Everett Carbody.

Seems to me, I've seen you
glancing in Lois' direction more than once.

Won't say yes,
won't say no.

What does she say?

(ALL LAUGHING)

SAM: What do you say, Jack?

I'll raise it a quarter.

Yeah, Lois is a pretty
good-Iooking woman.

Sets a nice table,
lots of goodies.

Well, I think
you're bluffing,

especially about
the goodies.

(ALL LAUGH)

He wishes.

SAM: How about you, Ron?

What? Oh...

Didn't I hear about
some kind of ruckus

between you and Bud
over at the gas station?

Fold.

Come to think of it,

I recall you and Bud
were going at it at the rummage sale.

Not over Lois.

Though I think she'd be
worth fighting for. Am I right, Ron?

Keep your opinions
to yourself, Carl.

What are you getting
all hot and bothered about?

I don't like all this
talk about Lois.

Oh, come on, now,
we're just having fun.

(ALL LAUGH)

Yeah, about a woman
who just lost her husband.

You're making her out
to be some kind of...

Sorry to intrude,
gentlemen.

Oh, Sheriff, this isn't
what it seems to be, is it, boys?

No, of course not.
Assuredly not.

All right.

Ron Stiller, I'm taking
you in for questioning

about the murder
of Bud Fricksey.

What? What,
you think I did it?

That's crazy.
Why would I kill Bud?

Hey, look, you guys
got it all wrong.

I mean, sure, I liked Lois
ever since high school.

But she never...
Excuse me.

Why don't we talk
about this in my office?

Deal him out.

JESSICA:
I'm sure you're following some sort of logic, Sheriff,

but Ron Stiller is not
my idea of a secret lover.

Okay, so he's
no Tom Selleck,

but he admits having
a crush on the lady.

And at the gas station,
there's a barrel of benzine

the size of a Quonset hut.

And how about
the witnesses who saw him

in a shouting match
with Bud Fricksey?

It all adds up.

Yeah, to about
six pounds of baloney.

Face it, Flatbush, you just
made the worst move

since the Dodgers packed up
and went to LA.

I just knew you were
gonna be a sore loser.

Hey, who lost?
Look, you went after a shark and came back with a guppy.

I got the big one.
Stanley Holmes.

Fred Owens' bookkeeper,
and my witness.

Your pillar of the community
owes money all over this town.

His suppliers
are threatening to cut him off.

He's behind
on his mortgage.

The gas and electric
have already sent him final notices,

and any day now,
the water's gonna be cut off.

Well, tell him, Stanley.

Well, Fred, he's having
a little trouble, yeah,

but it's nothing
he can't handle.

No, tell them
what you told me.

Fred's facing
a state audit,

and he asked me
to doctor his books.

I turned him down.

What did I tell you?
You scratch a failing businessman,

you get a fire.

Fred's always been good to me,
and he loves his business.

And I'm sure no matter
how desperate he is,

he wouldn't burn
his business down.

Even supposing he had
a motive for the fire?

Oh, you can bet your
jogging suit on that.

Is that a motive for murder?

You want motive?
I'll give you motive.

Fred is dousing the place
with benzine

when this Bud guy comes in
and catches him at it.

So, naturally,
Fred decks him

with the nearest available
blunt instrument.

Well, you may be
absolutely right, Miss Kowalski,

but, personally,
I have a big problem with a certain letter.

(DOORBELL RINGS)

Jessica, I wish
you'd called.

Lois, I hate to
bother you again,

but you're the only one
who can help.

Oh, you're right.
I should've called.

I'm sorry.
Forgive me for intruding.

(STAMMERING) Oh, no,
wait, Jessica, please. This is not what it seems.

I just dropped by
to offer my heartfelt condolences to Lois.

(STAMMERING) And she noticed
that I had a loose button on my shirt,

so she offered to
sew it on tight for me.

Well, surely
you don't think that Carl and I...

(CHUCKLING) Oh, no.

You mustn't let yourself
be fooled by appearances, Jessica.

I am, as you know,
a family man.

And if you ladies
will excuse me,

I've gotta be running along.

Jessica, come in,
please.

People have been
so kind to me lately.

Mostly men,
mostly firemen.

Sit down, Jessica.

Thank you.

Yes. Speaking of firemen,
Ron Stiller has been arrested.

Arrested?

But Carl...

For what?

Sheriff Metzger thinks
that he killed Bud.

Ron?

Ron couldn't do
a thing like that.

He's too kind, and gentle,
and understanding.

Lois, forgive me,
your personal life is your own.

If a murder were not involved,
I wouldn't be here,

but it seems to me that
the characteristics that you describe

fit the secret lover
that you describe in your letter to Bud.

Ron Stiller is not the man.

No, I don't think he is.

Neither is Carl Wilson,
nor any of the firemen.

Every time you
talked about him,

he became more extraordinary

and more ideal.

In fact, so ideal, I...

I have to wonder if, in fact,
he really exists at all.

There never was a lover,
was there, Lois?

You only wanted
Bud to think so.

Oh, Lord. I am so ashamed.

I was just trying to
attract Bud's attention.

I wanted him to look at me
and think about me.

And then I lost my courage.

That's when I begged Agnes
to destroy the letter.

When I came back from Boston,
nothing had changed.

It only changed after
you gave Bud the letter.

Changed? In what way?

He scared me.

His jealousy became
so intense it terrified me.

That wasn't what I wanted.

What did you want, Lois?

I wanted it...

I wanted it to be
the way it used to be.

But I'm stupid.

I should have realized
it was too late for that.

It's a nice picture,
though, huh?

Yes. It's a lovely picture.

Oh, dear.

Sorry, Jessica.
Did I say something?

Oh, no, no, no. It's just...

Thank you, Lois.

It was right in front of me
all the time.

Or I should say,
it wasn't in front of me.

Lois, you'll never know
what a big help you've been.

Stanley?

Hello, Jessica.

Surely you didn't refinish
all these pieces.

Yep.

Oh, this coffee table
is beautiful.

And these captain's chairs?

Yeah. The... The table's
for Alice Brimley.

The chairs are for
Marjorie and me.

I'm still looking
for a table to match.

Oh, this benzine really
smells, doesn't it?

Oh, is this the secret
stripping mixture you told me about?

It's part of it.

As soon as you called,
I mixed you a bottle. I've got it in the house.

Come on. It's time for me
to take a break, anyway.

Yes, I could do with
a drink of water.

It's so hot today.

Well, I just made some
lemonade this morning.

(EXCLAIMS)

If you need more sugar,
just let me know.

Oh, no, no,
I'm sure it's fine.

Stanley,
I'm sure you realize

that if Fred Owens
is tried for arson, or possibly murder,

you'll have to testify
against him.

Yeah, and I'd hate to do that.
You wanna sit down, Jessica?

Thank you.

I mean, I don't suppose
there's a man in town

that I like more than Fred.

He just... He doesn't have
a head for business.

Well, I must confess
that I'm not too good at it, either.

I paid much too much
for that small bureau

because you told me
that it was worth $50.

Well, it will be,
when it's fixed up.

Ah!

We were seeing it from
a different perspective.

I mean, maybe that's the way
you and Fred saw the business.

Fred thought that
the business was prospering.

'Cause he never looked
at the accounts

or listened to me.

I tried to tell him
it was going downhill time and again.

He just wouldn't
pay the bills.

The day of the fire,
I heard you tell someone on the telephone

that Fred was the one
who wrote all the checks.

But when the Sheriff
mentioned that to Fred, he was astonished.

That's what I pay you
to do, Stanley.

Oh, God.

Fred, uh...

Of course, what I...
What I meant was that...

That he signs them.

Yes, I sign them

after you fill them out
for me.

Of course, it never
occurred to me

to check to see
where they were going

or who they were
made out to.

I mean, why should I?
I trusted you.

But do you know something?

When I checked with the bank,
I found out there were checks made out

to people and to places
that I never heard of.

You set up dummy accounts
in Portland and Augusta

and then banked
the money yourself.

There's a word for that,
Stanley. Embezzlement.

And the audit
would have shown that.

So you had to get rid
of the books.

No, that's...
That's not true.

I'm afraid it is, Stanley.

That's why you slipped back
to the store that night.

You didn't even
have to break in.

You knew that Fred
was out of town and you had a key.

But I didn't go
near the office the night of the fire.

Oh, but you did,
and the proof is right here.

The photograph
of your fiancée.

This photograph.

It was missing
the night of the fire,

because

you couldn't bear
to let it burn.

But this is just a copy.

Oh, is it a copy
of the frame, too?

It's very distinctive,
with the same little nick in the corner.

Do you remember that,
Fred?

I sure do.

It all started
when I met Marjorie.

She's a wonderful woman.

She just has
expensive tastes.

She didn't like my old car.

She wanted a sleek
foreign model.

She didn't like my house,
or Cabot Cove, either.

She wants to live
in a condo in New York.

She...

It just snowballed.

I mean, once I started
taking, I...

I couldn't stop.

I'm sorry, Fred.

And are you sorry
about Bud Fricksey, too?

More than...

More than anything, I... I...

I can't believe this. I...

STANLEY: I started the fire
in the front of the store

and worked my way
back to the office,

thinking that it would
take longer for the furniture to catch.

It would be a simple matter
to burn the files and the accounts.

I heard a crash.

I just thought it was
a part of the fire,

and I was almost done. I...

I was just ready

to light a match,
and I looked up, and there was Bud.

I don't know which of us
was more shocked.

I hit him with the can.

The way he fell,
I was sure he was dead,

but what if he wasn't?

So I picked up
the phone to call,

and then I saw Marjorie

looking at me
from the knapsack.

And I just did
what I had to do. I...

God help me.

You got a better
chance with him than you have with a jury.

(STATIC BUZZING)

SAM: Testing, testing!

(SAM CLEARS THROAT)

Ladies and gentlemen,
attention, please.

Attention.

Come on,
friends and neighbors, listen up, now.

(PEOPLE LAUGHING)

Attention, please.

There comes a time
when mere words fail us.

Let this be one
of those times.

So let me say
that it is with great pride

that I accept this magnificent
firefighting machine

on behalf of the Volunteer
Fire Department of Cabot Cove.

(CHEERING)

Words are about
to fail him again.

Thank you, thank you.

And now I have
the pleasure of performing

another happy task,

that of introducing you
to your new Fire Chief,

Ron Stiller!

And now, let's see
what she can do!

Volunteers to action!

(CLANGING)

(FIRE ENGINE HORN HONKING)

(PEOPLE SCREAMING)

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