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1
00:00:03,086 --> 00:00:05,922
♪ The Simpsons ♪
2
00:01:04,022 --> 00:01:05,482
D'
3
00:01:05,565 --> 00:01:07,734
Aah!
4
00:01:22,123 --> 00:01:24,501
Live from Springfield Harbor,
5
00:01:24,584 --> 00:01:27,128
where the sewage
meets the sand...
6
00:01:30,256 --> 00:01:32,759
It's "The
Springfield Squares."
7
00:01:35,804 --> 00:01:37,764
Now, Jacqueline,
I believe it's your turn.
8
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I'll take
Rainier Wolfcastle to block.
9
00:01:40,850 --> 00:01:42,644
Rainier Wolfcastle,
star of "McBain"
10
00:01:42,727 --> 00:01:45,772
and the upcoming film
"Help, My Son is Nerd."
11
00:01:45,855 --> 00:01:48,691
My son returns from a
fancy east coast college
12
00:01:48,775 --> 00:01:52,237
and I'm horrified
to find he's a nerd.
13
00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:54,405
Ha ha ha!
I'm laughing already.
14
00:01:54,489 --> 00:01:56,908
It's not a comedy.
15
00:01:56,991 --> 00:01:58,660
Attention.
This is the coast guard.
16
00:01:58,743 --> 00:02:01,830
A 50-foot tidal wave
is heading this way.
17
00:02:01,913 --> 00:02:04,415
All game shows off the beach.
18
00:02:06,835 --> 00:02:08,795
Everybody up here to my square.
19
00:02:08,878 --> 00:02:11,297
It's safe and it's sexy.
Baby.
20
00:02:12,841 --> 00:02:13,883
Hurry, Charlie.
21
00:02:13,967 --> 00:02:15,927
There is not much time.
22
00:02:16,010 --> 00:02:17,720
I ain't going nowhere.
23
00:02:17,804 --> 00:02:20,640
I been in this square
purt' near 30 seasons
24
00:02:20,723 --> 00:02:22,183
and I ain't a-leaving now.
25
00:02:22,267 --> 00:02:23,434
Aah!
26
00:02:23,518 --> 00:02:24,686
He's dead now.
27
00:02:30,984 --> 00:02:32,777
Did you see that?
28
00:02:32,861 --> 00:02:34,487
- Yeah.
- What's Gabbo?
29
00:02:34,571 --> 00:02:36,823
I figure it's some guy's name.
30
00:02:36,906 --> 00:02:38,575
Some guy named Gabbo.
31
00:02:42,829 --> 00:02:43,746
I don't think they're giving you
32
00:02:43,830 --> 00:02:45,540
enough information, Dad.
33
00:02:45,623 --> 00:02:46,916
I'll figure it out.
34
00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:50,003
I'm going to use
all the power of my brain.
35
00:02:56,134 --> 00:02:58,094
- Look, Smithers.
- Bo is coming.
36
00:02:58,178 --> 00:02:59,470
Yes, sir.
37
00:03:01,598 --> 00:03:05,435
Everyone is saying
Gabbo this and Gabbo that,
38
00:03:05,518 --> 00:03:09,480
but no one is saying
worship this and Jericho that.
39
00:03:09,564 --> 00:03:11,191
What's this about Gabbo?
40
00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:15,778
I can't believe it...
41
00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:17,739
Our first glimpse of Gabbo.
42
00:03:17,822 --> 00:03:19,240
He'll tell us what to do.
43
00:03:22,368 --> 00:03:24,537
Hello. I'm Gabbo.
44
00:03:24,621 --> 00:03:26,080
And I'm Arthur Crandall.
45
00:03:26,164 --> 00:03:27,874
That's easy for you to say.
46
00:03:27,957 --> 00:03:29,918
You don't have a hand up
your tuchus.
47
00:03:30,001 --> 00:03:31,920
Oy! Hey!
48
00:03:32,003 --> 00:03:34,547
Gabbo, you'll say anything.
49
00:03:34,631 --> 00:03:36,925
And you can watch us
every afternoon at 4:00.
50
00:03:37,008 --> 00:03:39,928
That's the same time
as Krusty the clown.
51
00:03:40,011 --> 00:03:41,888
That cute little character
52
00:03:41,971 --> 00:03:43,723
could take America by storm.
53
00:03:43,806 --> 00:03:45,850
All he needs is a hook.
54
00:03:45,934 --> 00:03:48,311
I'm a bad wittle boy.
55
00:03:48,394 --> 00:03:49,520
Ay, caramba!
56
00:03:52,190 --> 00:03:53,775
♪ You're gonna like me ♪
57
00:03:53,858 --> 00:03:55,401
♪ You're gonna
love me ♪
58
00:03:55,485 --> 00:03:58,404
♪ 'Cause I can do
most anything ♪
59
00:03:58,488 --> 00:04:00,114
♪ I can do the hully gully ♪
60
00:04:01,658 --> 00:04:03,534
♪ I can imitate Vin Scully ♪
61
00:04:03,618 --> 00:04:05,495
Let's take time out from this triple play
62
00:04:05,578 --> 00:04:09,415
to talk about Farmer Dan's
pure pork sausages.
63
00:04:09,499 --> 00:04:11,125
♪ I'll give out shiny dimes ♪
64
00:04:12,627 --> 00:04:14,379
♪ I'll travel back in time ♪
65
00:04:15,713 --> 00:04:18,424
♪ You're gonna like him ♪
66
00:04:18,508 --> 00:04:20,134
♪ You're gonna
love him ♪
67
00:04:21,678 --> 00:04:24,764
♪ It's the greatest show ♪
68
00:04:24,847 --> 00:04:30,520
♪ In town ♪
69
00:04:30,603 --> 00:04:32,188
Gabbo!
70
00:04:34,691 --> 00:04:37,443
That dummy doesn't scare me.
71
00:04:37,527 --> 00:04:39,320
I've had plenty of guys
come after me,
72
00:04:39,404 --> 00:04:40,822
and I've buried them all...
73
00:04:40,905 --> 00:04:43,449
Hobos, sea captains,
Joey Bishop.
74
00:04:43,533 --> 00:04:45,326
Don't forget
the Special Olympics.
75
00:04:45,410 --> 00:04:46,828
Yeah.
76
00:04:46,911 --> 00:04:49,038
I slaughtered
the Special Olympics.
77
00:04:50,373 --> 00:04:51,874
Are those our ratings?
78
00:04:51,958 --> 00:04:53,042
Let me see.
79
00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:54,961
I lost to Channel Ocho?
80
00:04:55,044 --> 00:04:57,213
What the hell is that?
81
00:04:57,297 --> 00:04:59,549
Dos huevos, por favor.
82
00:04:59,632 --> 00:05:00,633
Ai!
83
00:05:00,717 --> 00:05:02,719
Que lastima.
84
00:05:02,802 --> 00:05:05,930
I got to steal that bit.
85
00:05:09,142 --> 00:05:10,351
This is boring.
86
00:05:10,435 --> 00:05:11,811
I wonder what would happen
87
00:05:11,894 --> 00:05:13,146
if you put your train on there.
88
00:05:17,025 --> 00:05:18,901
Cool.
89
00:05:18,985 --> 00:05:20,320
Now let's throw some crud on it.
90
00:05:20,403 --> 00:05:22,947
Hey, it's 4:00.
91
00:05:26,075 --> 00:05:28,494
So, you want
ventriloquism, do you?
92
00:05:28,578 --> 00:05:30,204
All right, watch this.
93
00:05:30,288 --> 00:05:33,041
Hello, Alphonse.
I've got a riddle for you.
94
00:05:33,124 --> 00:05:35,293
Why is a raven
like a writing desk?
95
00:05:35,376 --> 00:05:37,795
I don't know.
Why is a...
96
00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:42,008
Hey, the dummy can't hurt you.
97
00:05:42,091 --> 00:05:43,259
He's not even alive.
98
00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:45,303
He's dead.
99
00:05:57,273 --> 00:05:59,233
All right. Here's the deal.
100
00:05:59,317 --> 00:06:03,404
Every time you watch my show,
I will send you $40.
101
00:06:03,488 --> 00:06:05,156
Checks will not be honored.
102
00:06:05,239 --> 00:06:07,033
I admit I used the city treasury
103
00:06:07,116 --> 00:06:09,035
to fund the murder
of my enemies,
104
00:06:09,118 --> 00:06:13,122
but as Gabbo would say,
"I'm a bad wittle boy."
105
00:06:19,003 --> 00:06:20,338
Well, kids,
106
00:06:20,421 --> 00:06:22,423
this is where you would
watch "Itchy & Scratchy,"
107
00:06:22,507 --> 00:06:25,301
except they're on
"The Gabbo Show" now.
108
00:06:25,385 --> 00:06:28,930
So here's eastern Europe's
favorite cat-and-mouse team...
109
00:06:29,013 --> 00:06:31,265
"Worker and Parasite."
110
00:06:51,452 --> 00:06:53,538
What the hell was that?
111
00:07:03,798 --> 00:07:05,425
Well, that's it.
112
00:07:05,508 --> 00:07:07,135
We've been canceled.
113
00:07:07,218 --> 00:07:10,221
I think we can be proud
that we never did a bad show.
114
00:07:10,304 --> 00:07:11,472
Except for that week
115
00:07:11,556 --> 00:07:13,599
Ray Jay Johnson was my co-host.
116
00:07:13,683 --> 00:07:14,934
♪ You can call me Ray ♪
117
00:07:15,017 --> 00:07:16,936
♪ And you can call me Jay... ♪
118
00:07:17,019 --> 00:07:21,107
Ooh! That thing was funny
for about three seconds.
119
00:07:21,190 --> 00:07:23,985
But the important thing is
we're like a family.
120
00:07:24,068 --> 00:07:26,446
- Krusty, I...
- Shut your hole!
121
00:07:32,285 --> 00:07:33,453
Krusty, how you holding up?
122
00:07:33,536 --> 00:07:36,205
Well, I'm kind of worried
about the future.
123
00:07:36,289 --> 00:07:38,040
How do you deal with it?
124
00:07:38,124 --> 00:07:39,959
Well, you've been on TV
longer than I have.
125
00:07:40,042 --> 00:07:42,003
I'm sure you've saved up
quite a nest egg.
126
00:07:42,086 --> 00:07:43,921
Yeah.
127
00:07:44,005 --> 00:07:45,465
Do they still buy human hair
128
00:07:45,548 --> 00:07:47,216
down at the wig shop?
129
00:07:51,012 --> 00:07:52,322
Krusty, you want
to stay for dinner?
130
00:07:52,346 --> 00:07:53,514
Nah, sorry.
131
00:07:53,598 --> 00:07:55,016
That's too bad,
132
00:07:55,099 --> 00:07:57,059
'cause tonight my guests
will be Dr. Carl Sagan,
133
00:07:57,143 --> 00:07:59,145
and from the San Diego Zoo,
Joan Embree.
134
00:08:02,231 --> 00:08:04,192
Kyle, I just don't think
135
00:08:04,275 --> 00:08:06,277
I fit in here at Melrose Place.
136
00:08:06,360 --> 00:08:10,156
From now on, I'll be doing
the thinking for both of us.
137
00:08:11,532 --> 00:08:13,409
Next!
138
00:08:17,455 --> 00:08:18,956
Come on, you stupid horse!
139
00:08:19,040 --> 00:08:21,292
I got my last ten bucks on you.
140
00:08:21,375 --> 00:08:24,086
No, don't look at me.
141
00:08:24,170 --> 00:08:25,213
Run!
142
00:08:25,296 --> 00:08:27,256
No, don't come over here.
143
00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:29,759
Boy.
144
00:08:32,345 --> 00:08:34,597
And now it's time
for another patented
145
00:08:34,680 --> 00:08:36,766
Gabbo Crank Call.
146
00:08:36,849 --> 00:08:38,184
I love these.
147
00:08:38,267 --> 00:08:39,352
I can't believe it.
148
00:08:39,435 --> 00:08:41,187
He stole this bit from Krusty.
149
00:08:41,270 --> 00:08:43,731
Yeah, well, Krusty stole it
from Steve Allen.
150
00:08:43,814 --> 00:08:46,108
Everything's stolen nowadays.
151
00:08:46,192 --> 00:08:47,944
Why, the fax machine is nothing
152
00:08:48,027 --> 00:08:50,738
but a waffle iron
with a phone attached.
153
00:08:50,821 --> 00:08:52,240
It's ringing.
154
00:08:52,323 --> 00:08:54,534
Hello. Is this
Krusty the clown?
155
00:08:54,617 --> 00:08:56,619
Is this the callback
for that porno film?
156
00:08:56,702 --> 00:09:00,081
Look, I was a little nervous
that day, but I'm all man.
157
00:09:00,164 --> 00:09:02,124
I can assure you.
158
00:09:02,208 --> 00:09:05,127
No, I represent
a Japanese camera company.
159
00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:07,213
We'd like to pay you
two million dollars
160
00:09:07,296 --> 00:09:08,673
to do a camera commercial.
161
00:09:08,756 --> 00:09:11,676
Whoa! Me rikie vely much.
162
00:09:11,759 --> 00:09:13,886
I hope I didn't offend you.
163
00:09:13,970 --> 00:09:15,638
I need this bad.
164
00:09:15,721 --> 00:09:18,057
Bad enough to hit yourself
over the head with the phone?
165
00:09:18,140 --> 00:09:19,850
You got it.
166
00:09:21,352 --> 00:09:23,020
Ooh, blood.
167
00:09:26,232 --> 00:09:28,150
What the...
168
00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:29,735
If this is anyone
but Steve Allen,
169
00:09:29,819 --> 00:09:31,821
you're stealing my bit.
170
00:09:31,904 --> 00:09:33,173
Somebody ought
to ruin Gabbo's career
171
00:09:33,197 --> 00:09:34,699
the way he ruined Krusty's.
172
00:09:34,782 --> 00:09:36,659
Two wrongs don't make
a right, Bart.
173
00:09:36,742 --> 00:09:38,011
- Yes, they do.
- No, they don't.
174
00:09:38,035 --> 00:09:39,315
- Yes, they do.
- No, they don't.
175
00:09:39,370 --> 00:09:40,496
- Yes, they do.
- Dad!
176
00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:42,707
Two wrongs make a right, Lisa.
177
00:09:42,790 --> 00:09:44,667
Rex Morgan, M.D.
178
00:09:44,750 --> 00:09:47,253
You have the prescription
for the daily blues.
179
00:09:49,839 --> 00:09:51,299
We'll be back
after this commercial
180
00:09:51,382 --> 00:09:52,633
for Gabbo Airlines.
181
00:09:52,717 --> 00:09:54,802
And... cut.
182
00:09:54,885 --> 00:09:56,554
That ought to hold
the little S.O.B.s.
183
00:09:56,637 --> 00:09:58,264
Gabbo, quiet.
184
00:09:58,347 --> 00:10:00,600
I wouldn't want to
offend the little S.O.B.s.
185
00:10:00,683 --> 00:10:01,883
I wish you'd stop saying that.
186
00:10:05,730 --> 00:10:07,648
Hey, boy-o.
What's so funny?
187
00:10:07,732 --> 00:10:08,899
Well, it's...
188
00:10:08,983 --> 00:10:10,210
Nah, you wouldn't be interested.
189
00:10:10,234 --> 00:10:11,277
It's too low-brow.
190
00:10:11,360 --> 00:10:12,695
No, I'm quite low-brow.
191
00:10:12,778 --> 00:10:14,822
Well, somebody just
wrote a bawdy limerick
192
00:10:14,905 --> 00:10:16,282
on the men's room wall.
193
00:10:16,365 --> 00:10:17,365
This I got to see!
194
00:10:20,369 --> 00:10:23,956
All the kids in Springfield
are S.O.B.s.
195
00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:27,501
Gabbo's kind of language
has no place on or off TV,
196
00:10:27,585 --> 00:10:29,503
and that's my two cents.
197
00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:34,091
That ought to hold
those S.O.B.s.
198
00:10:34,175 --> 00:10:35,343
What the...
199
00:10:39,805 --> 00:10:41,098
No.
200
00:10:43,392 --> 00:10:45,144
Krusty, are you
making any money?
201
00:10:45,227 --> 00:10:48,272
Nah. That guy's
giving it away for free.
202
00:10:48,356 --> 00:10:51,317
♪ The old gray mare, she
ain't what she used to be ♪
203
00:10:51,400 --> 00:10:53,069
♪ Ain't what she used to be ♪
204
00:10:53,152 --> 00:10:54,403
♪ Ain't what
she used to be... ♪
205
00:10:56,405 --> 00:10:58,574
35 years in show business,
206
00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:02,578
and already no one
remembers me, just like...
207
00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:05,039
what's his name and whoozits,
208
00:11:05,122 --> 00:11:08,334
and, you know, that guy...
always wore a shirt.
209
00:11:08,417 --> 00:11:10,169
- Ed Sullivan?
- Yeah.
210
00:11:10,252 --> 00:11:12,838
I didn't know
you knew Luke Perry.
211
00:11:12,922 --> 00:11:16,175
Know him? He's my worthless
half-brother.
212
00:11:16,258 --> 00:11:18,010
He's a big TV star.
213
00:11:18,094 --> 00:11:20,304
Yeah, on Fox.
214
00:11:21,514 --> 00:11:23,432
Elizabeth Taylor.
215
00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:25,518
Bette Midler.
216
00:11:25,601 --> 00:11:27,353
Bette and I owned
a racehorse together...
217
00:11:27,436 --> 00:11:28,813
Krudler.
218
00:11:28,896 --> 00:11:30,981
Hey, Bart, if we get
all these big stars
219
00:11:31,065 --> 00:11:32,650
to appear on
a special with Krusty,
220
00:11:32,733 --> 00:11:34,610
it might get
his career going again.
221
00:11:40,116 --> 00:11:41,033
Here's my address book.
222
00:11:41,117 --> 00:11:42,827
Go get those stars.
223
00:11:43,786 --> 00:11:45,246
It won't be easy,
224
00:11:45,329 --> 00:11:50,543
but I'm going to claw
my way back onto TV.
225
00:11:50,626 --> 00:11:53,504
♪ The old gray mare, she
ain't what she used to be ♪
226
00:11:53,587 --> 00:11:55,297
♪ Ain't what she used to be ♪
227
00:11:55,381 --> 00:11:57,049
♪ Ain't what she
used to be... ♪
228
00:11:57,133 --> 00:12:00,094
And now,
the crazy old man singers.
229
00:12:00,177 --> 00:12:03,013
♪ The old gray mare,
she ain't what she used to be ♪
230
00:12:03,097 --> 00:12:04,598
♪ Ain't what she
used to be... ♪
231
00:12:11,689 --> 00:12:13,190
Miss Midler, I can't believe
232
00:12:13,274 --> 00:12:14,984
you do this all by yourself.
233
00:12:15,067 --> 00:12:17,111
We're Americans.
We deserve clean highways.
234
00:12:20,114 --> 00:12:21,157
You pigs!
235
00:12:23,367 --> 00:12:24,869
No.
236
00:12:24,952 --> 00:12:26,328
Bette Midler.
237
00:12:33,711 --> 00:12:34,628
Now where were we?
238
00:12:34,712 --> 00:12:36,005
We were asking you to appear
239
00:12:36,088 --> 00:12:38,507
on Krusty's comeback special.
240
00:12:38,591 --> 00:12:40,676
Okay. Tell Krusty
he can count me in.
241
00:12:45,181 --> 00:12:48,017
It's time to take out the trash.
242
00:12:50,895 --> 00:12:53,189
I'll get you for this, Midler!
243
00:12:56,901 --> 00:12:58,235
And off to your left
244
00:12:58,319 --> 00:13:00,362
is Hugh Hefner's
Shelbyville pad.
245
00:13:00,446 --> 00:13:02,364
A lot of people know
about the grotto
246
00:13:02,448 --> 00:13:04,492
- and the game room.
- Of course.
247
00:13:04,575 --> 00:13:07,036
But few know about the laboratory...
The biosphere.
248
00:13:07,119 --> 00:13:09,205
The alternative energy
research center.
249
00:13:12,958 --> 00:13:14,210
Fascinating.
250
00:13:19,173 --> 00:13:20,508
Desalinization plant?
251
00:13:20,591 --> 00:13:22,760
Yes. The grotto uses
so much water.
252
00:13:22,843 --> 00:13:24,678
The bunnies felt
we should go this way.
253
00:13:24,762 --> 00:13:26,055
Smart bunnies, Hef.
254
00:13:26,138 --> 00:13:27,348
I can call you Hef, can't I?
255
00:13:27,431 --> 00:13:28,431
No.
256
00:13:31,185 --> 00:13:33,938
You told our agent this place
holds 30,000 people.
257
00:13:34,021 --> 00:13:36,440
It does. We had 30,000 here
last night.
258
00:13:36,524 --> 00:13:38,526
Now play! The audience
is getting restless.
259
00:13:38,609 --> 00:13:42,196
We want Chili Willy.
We want Chili Willy.
260
00:13:43,948 --> 00:13:45,157
Hey, Red Hot Chili Peppers,
261
00:13:45,241 --> 00:13:46,401
would you guys like to appear
262
00:13:46,450 --> 00:13:48,285
on a Krusty the clown special?
263
00:13:48,369 --> 00:13:50,079
Sure, if you can get us
out of this gig.
264
00:13:50,162 --> 00:13:52,581
No problemo.
Hey Moe, look over there!
265
00:13:52,665 --> 00:13:54,166
What? What am I looking at?
266
00:13:54,250 --> 00:13:55,876
I don't see nothing.
267
00:13:55,960 --> 00:13:57,795
I'm gonna stop looking soon.
268
00:13:57,878 --> 00:13:59,797
What?
What, is that it?
269
00:13:59,880 --> 00:14:01,549
Hey, Moe, can I look too?
270
00:14:01,632 --> 00:14:03,342
Sure, but it will cost you.
271
00:14:03,425 --> 00:14:04,635
My wallet's in the car.
272
00:14:05,803 --> 00:14:07,388
He is so stupid.
273
00:14:07,471 --> 00:14:08,681
And now back to the wall.
274
00:14:15,271 --> 00:14:17,398
Miss Taylor,
a couple of grade school kids
275
00:14:17,481 --> 00:14:19,066
wanted you to be
on a Krusty special.
276
00:14:19,149 --> 00:14:21,110
I told them to buzz off.
277
00:14:21,193 --> 00:14:22,194
Good.
278
00:14:26,073 --> 00:14:27,908
Krusty, we've got great news.
279
00:14:32,621 --> 00:14:35,374
Krusty, what have you
done to yourself?
280
00:14:35,457 --> 00:14:36,834
I thought I'd get into shape
281
00:14:36,917 --> 00:14:39,169
so I've been drinking
nothing but milk shakes.
282
00:14:39,253 --> 00:14:41,964
You mean those diet milkshakes?
283
00:14:42,047 --> 00:14:43,382
Now you can stay with us
284
00:14:43,465 --> 00:14:44,633
until you lose that weight.
285
00:14:44,717 --> 00:14:45,926
You can sleep on the sofa.
286
00:14:46,010 --> 00:14:47,386
It folds right out.
287
00:14:52,057 --> 00:14:53,767
Wait.
That was the old sofa.
288
00:15:01,984 --> 00:15:04,403
I'll never get my aim back.
289
00:15:04,486 --> 00:15:05,686
You got to keep working on it.
290
00:15:10,659 --> 00:15:12,953
Delicious.
291
00:15:16,332 --> 00:15:17,332
Why am I bothering?
292
00:15:17,374 --> 00:15:18,667
It's hopeless.
293
00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:21,879
Hi, kids. It's me.
Gabbo.
294
00:15:28,510 --> 00:15:31,347
Pork prices rose in
early trading today.
295
00:15:40,272 --> 00:15:42,483
But you've got to
come back, Mel.
296
00:15:42,566 --> 00:15:43,484
We're a team.
297
00:15:43,567 --> 00:15:44,860
No, Krusty.
298
00:15:44,944 --> 00:15:46,654
You always treated me
rather shabbily.
299
00:15:46,737 --> 00:15:49,573
On our last show, you poured
liquid nitrogen down my pants,
300
00:15:49,657 --> 00:15:51,533
and cracked my buttocks
with a hammer.
301
00:15:51,617 --> 00:15:52,617
Come on.
302
00:15:52,660 --> 00:15:53,911
Do you want to waste your life
303
00:15:53,994 --> 00:15:55,913
hanging out with a bunch
of dorky teenagers?
304
00:15:55,996 --> 00:15:57,665
Here's your taco, mister.
305
00:15:57,748 --> 00:15:58,666
Whoops.
306
00:15:58,749 --> 00:15:59,667
It fell in the fryer.
307
00:15:59,750 --> 00:16:00,750
I'll get it out.
308
00:16:04,713 --> 00:16:06,507
Sorry, Krusty, I like it here.
309
00:16:06,590 --> 00:16:08,717
Mr. Johanssen treats me
with dignity.
310
00:16:08,801 --> 00:16:10,511
Is this clown
bothering you, Mel?
311
00:16:10,594 --> 00:16:11,929
That's all right,
Mr. Johanssen.
312
00:16:12,012 --> 00:16:13,681
I'll handle it.
313
00:16:13,764 --> 00:16:14,682
Here's your taco, sir.
314
00:16:14,765 --> 00:16:15,933
I don't want it.
315
00:16:16,016 --> 00:16:17,351
But this comes out of my salary.
316
00:16:17,434 --> 00:16:19,436
If I had a girlfriend,
she'd kill me.
317
00:16:19,520 --> 00:16:22,314
Okay, Krusty, let's
rehearse the balloon bit.
318
00:16:23,399 --> 00:16:24,400
Look, kids!
319
00:16:25,734 --> 00:16:27,528
A horsey!
320
00:16:27,611 --> 00:16:29,989
And what are you making,
Sideshow Luke Perry?
321
00:16:32,157 --> 00:16:33,826
A 19th century carousel.
322
00:16:36,954 --> 00:16:39,248
Upstage me, will you!
323
00:16:39,331 --> 00:16:40,791
Get the hell out!
324
00:16:40,874 --> 00:16:43,502
Look, there must be something
I can do on the show.
325
00:16:43,585 --> 00:16:45,629
Please, for Mom's sake.
326
00:16:45,713 --> 00:16:48,924
Well, maybe
we can find something.
327
00:17:04,273 --> 00:17:05,607
I don't like it.
328
00:17:05,691 --> 00:17:07,151
He's got Johnny Carson,
Bette Midler,
329
00:17:07,234 --> 00:17:08,569
and Hugh Hefner.
330
00:17:08,652 --> 00:17:09,737
What do we got?
331
00:17:09,820 --> 00:17:11,530
Ray Jay Johnson.
332
00:17:11,613 --> 00:17:15,075
Ay-yi-yi-yi-yi-yi-yi-yi.
333
00:17:16,368 --> 00:17:18,495
Now boys, the network
has a problem
334
00:17:18,579 --> 00:17:19,955
with some of your lyrics.
335
00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:21,679
Would you mind changing them
for the show?
336
00:17:21,707 --> 00:17:23,250
Forget you, clown.
337
00:17:23,333 --> 00:17:24,853
Hey, our lyrics are
like our children, man.
338
00:17:24,877 --> 00:17:26,253
No way.
339
00:17:26,336 --> 00:17:28,338
Well, okay.
But here where you say,
340
00:17:28,422 --> 00:17:30,758
"What I got you got to get
and put it in you."
341
00:17:30,841 --> 00:17:34,011
How about just, "What I'd like
is I'd like to hug and kiss you."
342
00:17:34,094 --> 00:17:37,014
Wow.
That's much better.
343
00:17:37,097 --> 00:17:38,682
Everyone can enjoy that.
344
00:17:38,766 --> 00:17:40,350
Live from Springfield,
345
00:17:40,434 --> 00:17:42,186
the entertainment capital
of this state,
346
00:17:42,269 --> 00:17:44,730
the Krusty Komeback special.
347
00:17:47,691 --> 00:17:50,611
♪ Send in... ♪
348
00:17:50,694 --> 00:17:54,615
♪ The clowns ♪
349
00:17:54,698 --> 00:17:59,828
♪ Those daffy, laughy clowns ♪
350
00:17:59,912 --> 00:18:03,832
♪ Send in those soulful
and doleful ♪
351
00:18:03,916 --> 00:18:09,713
♪ Schmaltz-by-the-bowlful
clowns ♪
352
00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:16,011
♪ Send in the clowns... ♪
353
00:18:18,972 --> 00:18:23,811
♪ They're already ♪
354
00:18:23,894 --> 00:18:28,941
♪ Here ♪
355
00:18:34,279 --> 00:18:35,823
I love you, Krusty.
356
00:18:35,906 --> 00:18:37,407
Quiet.
357
00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:45,165
Are you comfortable in there,
Luke Perry?
358
00:18:45,249 --> 00:18:46,500
Fire away, Krusty.
359
00:18:54,800 --> 00:18:57,177
My face!
My valuable face!
360
00:18:58,387 --> 00:18:59,387
Hmph.
361
00:19:09,815 --> 00:19:10,815
Ay...
362
00:19:12,943 --> 00:19:15,112
♪ Give it away, give it away,
give it away now ♪
363
00:19:15,195 --> 00:19:17,656
♪ Give it away, give it away
give it away now ♪
364
00:19:17,739 --> 00:19:20,534
♪ I can't tell if I'm
a kingpin or a pauper ♪
365
00:19:20,617 --> 00:19:22,077
Dancing around
in their underwear.
366
00:19:22,161 --> 00:19:24,246
That is so degrading.
367
00:19:24,329 --> 00:19:26,415
30 seconds till your
Little Stinker sketch.
368
00:19:26,498 --> 00:19:28,041
Give me a bigger lolly.
369
00:19:28,125 --> 00:19:30,377
Now, Johnny,
what do you got for us?
370
00:19:30,460 --> 00:19:32,462
Some jokes?
A little magic?
371
00:19:32,546 --> 00:19:34,882
Actually, I thought
I'd lift this 1987
372
00:19:34,965 --> 00:19:36,633
Buick Skylark over my head.
373
00:19:38,802 --> 00:19:40,095
Hi-yo!
374
00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:41,430
Johnny, that's amazing.
375
00:19:41,513 --> 00:19:43,098
Yeah?
Get a load of this.
376
00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:04,077
I've got to fire that agent.
377
00:20:06,997 --> 00:20:12,127
♪ Did you ever know
that you're my hero? ♪
378
00:20:14,254 --> 00:20:19,218
♪ You're everything
I would like to be ♪
379
00:20:21,845 --> 00:20:26,642
♪ You can fly higher
than an eagle ♪
380
00:20:28,977 --> 00:20:31,480
- ♪ 'Cause you are the wind ♪
- ♪ 'Cause I am the wind
381
00:20:31,563 --> 00:20:35,525
- ♪ Beneath my wings ♪
- ♪ Beneath your wings ♪
382
00:20:44,201 --> 00:20:46,328
This was a great show, Krusty.
383
00:20:46,411 --> 00:20:47,788
You deserve an Emmy for this.
384
00:20:47,871 --> 00:20:48,914
Forget it.
385
00:20:48,997 --> 00:20:50,123
The academy hates me.
386
00:20:50,207 --> 00:20:51,792
I don't know why.
387
00:20:51,875 --> 00:20:53,752
Bunch of old know-nothing
dinosaurs
388
00:20:53,835 --> 00:20:55,921
wouldn't know entertainment
if it bit them in the...
389
00:20:56,004 --> 00:20:58,215
Hey, hey!
390
00:21:06,515 --> 00:21:08,308
Now, Krusty,
I just hope you remember
391
00:21:08,392 --> 00:21:10,018
to save your money this time.
392
00:21:10,102 --> 00:21:12,813
Here's that ruby-studded
clown nose you ordered, Krusty.
393
00:21:15,857 --> 00:21:16,733
Ay...
394
00:21:16,817 --> 00:21:17,609
- What's up, Moe?
- Hey, Moe.
395
00:21:17,693 --> 00:21:18,819
- Hey, Moe.
- Hey, Moe!
396
00:21:18,902 --> 00:21:21,113
Hey. You can't come in here
dressed like that.
397
00:21:21,196 --> 00:21:23,031
Get with the times, Moe.
398
00:21:23,115 --> 00:21:26,285
Yeah. I say if it
feels good, do it.
399
00:21:26,368 --> 00:21:27,368
All right.
400
00:21:30,706 --> 00:21:31,999
Don't snap my undies.
401
00:21:32,082 --> 00:21:34,543
I'm a star again.
402
00:21:34,626 --> 00:21:36,837
I don't know
how to thank you, kids.
403
00:21:36,920 --> 00:21:38,338
That's all right, Krusty.
404
00:21:38,422 --> 00:21:40,757
We're getting 50 percent
of the t-shirt sales.
405
00:21:40,841 --> 00:21:41,883
What?!
406
00:21:41,967 --> 00:21:43,385
That's the sweetest plum!
407
00:21:43,468 --> 00:21:45,262
You little...
408
00:21:45,345 --> 00:21:47,055
What the hell.
409
00:21:47,139 --> 00:21:48,640
You deserve it.
410
00:21:48,724 --> 00:21:50,100
Thanks, kids.
411
00:21:50,183 --> 00:21:51,560
To Krusty...
412
00:21:51,643 --> 00:21:53,729
The greatest entertainer
in the world.
413
00:21:54,980 --> 00:21:56,315
Except maybe that guy.
414
00:21:59,109 --> 00:22:01,361
Is this the bus
to the civic center?
415
00:22:11,663 --> 00:22:14,791
♪♪
416
00:22:57,167 --> 00:22:58,167
Shh.
417
00:23:01,338 --> 00:23:03,715
CAPTIONS ENHANCED BY
ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC.
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