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1
00:00:04,330 --> 00:00:05,800
- As dusk approaches,
2
00:00:05,800 --> 00:00:07,940
the ethereal winds bring forth the minions
3
00:00:07,940 --> 00:00:09,650
of bedlam and chaos.
4
00:00:09,650 --> 00:00:11,880
And it is I who plays the siren song
5
00:00:11,880 --> 00:00:14,950
which calls these beasts
to the mortal realms.
6
00:00:14,950 --> 00:00:17,659
For I am The Summoner!
7
00:00:17,659 --> 00:00:19,813
(screaming)
8
00:00:19,813 --> 00:00:22,896
(intense rock music)
9
00:00:58,560 --> 00:01:00,260
- Hey, that was great, Summoner.
10
00:01:00,260 --> 00:01:01,690
I think we got it.
11
00:01:01,690 --> 00:01:02,793
You can clock off now.
12
00:01:14,329 --> 00:01:16,996
(gentle music)
13
00:01:29,102 --> 00:01:31,602
- Thanks guys, see you Monday.
14
00:01:42,576 --> 00:01:44,742
(yawning)
15
00:01:44,742 --> 00:01:46,609
(upbeat music)
16
00:01:46,609 --> 00:01:47,442
Nope.
17
00:01:47,442 --> 00:01:48,396
(intense rock music)
18
00:01:48,396 --> 00:01:49,454
Nope.
19
00:01:49,454 --> 00:01:52,121
(gentle music)
20
00:01:58,246 --> 00:01:59,079
Damn it!
21
00:01:59,938 --> 00:02:02,605
(gentle music)
22
00:02:12,380 --> 00:02:13,473
Hello, Donald.
23
00:02:18,390 --> 00:02:20,290
- It was a presence.
24
00:02:20,290 --> 00:02:21,953
This thing was fucking horny!
25
00:02:21,953 --> 00:02:23,660
(laughing)
26
00:02:23,660 --> 00:02:24,493
What can I say.
27
00:02:27,014 --> 00:02:28,434
- [Operator] You can clock off now.
28
00:02:28,434 --> 00:02:30,257
- Fuck!
29
00:02:30,257 --> 00:02:31,701
(horn honking)
30
00:02:31,701 --> 00:02:32,534
Damn it!
31
00:02:33,517 --> 00:02:36,431
- [Man] This thing was fucking horny!
32
00:02:36,431 --> 00:02:38,543
- [Operator] You can clock off now.
33
00:02:38,543 --> 00:02:39,376
- Damn it!
34
00:02:40,591 --> 00:02:42,247
- This thing was fucking horny!
35
00:02:42,247 --> 00:02:43,504
- You can clock off now.
- Damn it!
36
00:02:43,504 --> 00:02:45,124
- [Man] This thing was fucking horny!
37
00:02:45,124 --> 00:02:46,624
- Fuck!
- Damn it!
38
00:02:55,784 --> 00:02:57,340
- I said possess her?
39
00:02:57,340 --> 00:02:59,101
I hardly knew her!
40
00:02:59,101 --> 00:03:01,351
(laughing)
41
00:03:05,030 --> 00:03:07,963
Hey, what's wrong man?
42
00:03:09,200 --> 00:03:10,033
- Nothin'.
43
00:03:10,033 --> 00:03:11,200
- No, I'm serious.
44
00:03:11,200 --> 00:03:12,990
You can talk to me.
45
00:03:12,990 --> 00:03:14,910
- It's just, Balthazar,
46
00:03:14,910 --> 00:03:17,070
have you ever wanted more in your life?
47
00:03:17,070 --> 00:03:18,990
- Like a promotion?
48
00:03:18,990 --> 00:03:21,220
- No, well, not exactly.
49
00:03:21,220 --> 00:03:22,053
It's just that I feel like
50
00:03:22,053 --> 00:03:24,850
I'm doing the same thing
over and over again.
51
00:03:24,850 --> 00:03:26,920
There's no change, there's no diversity,
52
00:03:26,920 --> 00:03:28,750
there's no freedom.
53
00:03:28,750 --> 00:03:32,180
It's just repetition
and I feel empty inside.
54
00:03:32,180 --> 00:03:35,290
- That's because you don't have a soul.
55
00:03:35,290 --> 00:03:37,240
- Would you just listen for one second?
56
00:03:38,797 --> 00:03:39,630
I've been playing metal
57
00:03:39,630 --> 00:03:42,530
and promoting depravity for
as long as I can remember
58
00:03:42,530 --> 00:03:44,970
and now it seems like that's
all that I'm good for.
59
00:03:44,970 --> 00:03:46,480
I can't be destined to bring songs
60
00:03:46,480 --> 00:03:49,033
of suffering to all of
humanity for eternity.
61
00:03:50,290 --> 00:03:52,730
I think it's time I started
working on my passion.
62
00:03:52,730 --> 00:03:55,010
- Oh no, this isn't another
63
00:03:55,010 --> 00:03:59,030
Fred from accounting tries
selling mix tapes, is it?
64
00:03:59,030 --> 00:04:01,123
- No, it's even better.
65
00:04:02,080 --> 00:04:06,363
Selling affordable
single-family real estate.
66
00:04:09,217 --> 00:04:11,967
(birds chirping)
67
00:04:18,100 --> 00:04:19,980
- Well, well, well.
68
00:04:19,980 --> 00:04:22,210
What do we have here?
69
00:04:22,210 --> 00:04:23,430
- Good morning sir!
70
00:04:23,430 --> 00:04:25,640
Would you be interested
in buyin' a house today?
71
00:04:25,640 --> 00:04:28,100
- That's not how you
start a pitch, rookie.
72
00:04:28,100 --> 00:04:31,470
I'm here to inform you
you're on my territory.
73
00:04:31,470 --> 00:04:33,870
The name's Chadly Derekson,
74
00:04:33,870 --> 00:04:36,120
and you'd best not forget it.
75
00:04:36,120 --> 00:04:38,930
I'm the Real Estate King of LA.
76
00:04:38,930 --> 00:04:42,570
No one even looks at a house
here without my say so.
77
00:04:42,570 --> 00:04:44,857
- With all due respect, Mr. Derekson,
78
00:04:45,820 --> 00:04:48,220
you're blocking my view
of a potential customer.
79
00:04:49,280 --> 00:04:51,301
Hey, you wanna buy a house?
80
00:04:51,301 --> 00:04:52,660
(screaming)
81
00:04:52,660 --> 00:04:53,790
- You know what?
82
00:04:53,790 --> 00:04:56,560
I was planning on running you out of town,
83
00:04:56,560 --> 00:04:58,240
but it seems like you're
doin' a good enough job
84
00:04:58,240 --> 00:05:00,600
puttin' yourself out of business.
85
00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:05,163
I'll be going for now,
but know just one thing:
86
00:05:06,010 --> 00:05:08,573
you won't last one day in this business.
87
00:05:10,132 --> 00:05:12,382
(laughing)
88
00:05:17,821 --> 00:05:20,488
(gentle music)
89
00:05:28,610 --> 00:05:30,180
- And this is the kitchen.
90
00:05:30,180 --> 00:05:33,400
It's really nice because
you can make food here.
91
00:05:33,400 --> 00:05:36,920
But I think my favorite
room is the basement.
92
00:05:36,920 --> 00:05:39,360
- Really, why's that?
93
00:05:39,360 --> 00:05:42,393
- Well, it's soundproof.
94
00:05:43,420 --> 00:05:45,803
You know, for all the screaming.
95
00:05:46,684 --> 00:05:48,926
(screaming)
96
00:05:48,926 --> 00:05:50,607
- Oh, you know what,
97
00:05:50,607 --> 00:05:53,633
I just realized I have a
chiropractors appointment.
98
00:05:53,633 --> 00:05:55,240
I gotta go.
99
00:05:55,240 --> 00:05:56,466
It's right now.
100
00:05:56,466 --> 00:05:59,133
(gentle music)
101
00:06:09,480 --> 00:06:10,530
- Here's the bedroom.
102
00:06:11,440 --> 00:06:13,420
You'll notice it has a bed.
103
00:06:13,420 --> 00:06:14,763
It's very soft.
104
00:06:15,740 --> 00:06:18,690
I can actually guarantee that
you'll go right to (snoring).
105
00:06:21,848 --> 00:06:24,440
- Um, excuse me?
106
00:06:24,440 --> 00:06:26,837
Are you--
(screaming)
107
00:06:29,456 --> 00:06:32,123
(gentle music)
108
00:06:37,124 --> 00:06:37,957
- And as you will see,
109
00:06:37,957 --> 00:06:40,513
the closet is already
stocked with necessities.
110
00:06:47,700 --> 00:06:49,350
And you'll feel safe inside
111
00:06:49,350 --> 00:06:52,790
because this door can
really take a beating.
112
00:06:52,790 --> 00:06:54,543
Trust me, I know.
113
00:06:58,744 --> 00:07:00,030
And that concludes the tour.
114
00:07:00,030 --> 00:07:02,180
Can I answer any questions you might have?
115
00:07:02,180 --> 00:07:03,013
- Nope.
- No.
116
00:07:04,124 --> 00:07:08,730
Thank you, we really appreciate
the tour, Mr. Summoner.
117
00:07:08,730 --> 00:07:12,180
- Please, call me Summoner.
118
00:07:12,180 --> 00:07:14,820
- Right, um, you know, I just
don't think we're really ready
119
00:07:14,820 --> 00:07:16,050
to buy a house right now.
120
00:07:16,050 --> 00:07:18,880
- No, don't worry, it's
a worthy investment.
121
00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:21,580
The property value can
only go up from here.
122
00:07:21,580 --> 00:07:22,413
- See that's just the thing.
123
00:07:22,413 --> 00:07:26,110
I'm not sure I really could
trust financial advice from,
124
00:07:26,110 --> 00:07:28,630
what would you call yourself, a monster?
125
00:07:28,630 --> 00:07:30,243
- What's wrong with that?
126
00:07:31,480 --> 00:07:35,150
- I'm not sure you have my
family's best interests at heart.
127
00:07:35,150 --> 00:07:37,130
The answer is no.
128
00:07:37,130 --> 00:07:39,780
- Hey, do you wanna see a magic trick?
129
00:07:39,780 --> 00:07:42,140
You know the game got your nose?
130
00:07:42,140 --> 00:07:42,990
Well...
131
00:07:44,640 --> 00:07:45,473
Ta da!
132
00:07:46,667 --> 00:07:47,830
- Summoner, I don't think
133
00:07:47,830 --> 00:07:49,190
that's appropriate to show a child.
134
00:07:49,190 --> 00:07:51,439
You know, Chadly was right about you.
135
00:07:51,439 --> 00:07:52,986
- Chadly?
136
00:07:52,986 --> 00:07:54,160
Chadly Derekson?
137
00:07:54,160 --> 00:07:56,610
- Yes and when we got here
he was outside telling us
138
00:07:56,610 --> 00:07:59,240
that there was some demon trying
to sell dangerous property.
139
00:07:59,240 --> 00:08:00,457
Let's go!
140
00:08:00,457 --> 00:08:02,790
(screaming)
141
00:08:07,190 --> 00:08:08,490
- I swear to God,
142
00:08:08,490 --> 00:08:11,249
they were able to give
Jim the house for free.
143
00:08:11,249 --> 00:08:12,190
(laughing)
144
00:08:12,190 --> 00:08:13,909
It was so good!
145
00:08:13,909 --> 00:08:14,880
- Chadly!
146
00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:16,830
You've been sabotaging my business.
147
00:08:16,830 --> 00:08:17,663
- Aw that's rich.
148
00:08:19,100 --> 00:08:20,490
I wasn't sabotaging it,
149
00:08:20,490 --> 00:08:23,000
I'm merely helping move you to retirement.
150
00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:24,463
- What's your problem?
151
00:08:25,490 --> 00:08:27,190
- What's my problem?
152
00:08:27,190 --> 00:08:30,700
I already told you, I'm
the Real Estate King,
153
00:08:30,700 --> 00:08:32,020
and I can't have some ghoul
154
00:08:32,020 --> 00:08:33,840
mucking up the playing field.
155
00:08:33,840 --> 00:08:35,340
It's bad for business.
156
00:08:35,340 --> 00:08:37,360
Could you imagine what
customers would think
157
00:08:37,360 --> 00:08:40,000
of real estate if they
saw some undead freak
158
00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:42,610
trying to hawk property next to us?
159
00:08:42,610 --> 00:08:46,940
- There's nothing wrong
with being a ghoul.
160
00:08:46,940 --> 00:08:48,220
- Are you kidding?
161
00:08:48,220 --> 00:08:53,120
The only thing your kind is
good for is spooking kids.
162
00:08:53,120 --> 00:08:55,320
No one would listen to
what you have to say.
163
00:08:57,262 --> 00:09:00,345
(intense rock music)
164
00:09:02,004 --> 00:09:03,850
- You know what?
165
00:09:03,850 --> 00:09:05,680
I think you're wrong about that.
166
00:09:09,304 --> 00:09:12,420
- It seems like you'll need
some physical persuasion.
167
00:09:12,420 --> 00:09:14,220
Meet the Sunset Drive gang:
168
00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:17,930
Tiffany Balderdash and The Mongoose.
169
00:09:17,930 --> 00:09:21,200
The best real estate agents
this side of Beverly Hills.
170
00:09:21,200 --> 00:09:24,976
We'll kick your ass and
still have time for coffee.
171
00:09:24,976 --> 00:09:28,059
(intense rock music)
172
00:09:33,129 --> 00:09:35,462
(screaming)
173
00:10:32,057 --> 00:10:35,774
- I may be the physical
manifestation of evil
174
00:10:35,774 --> 00:10:37,607
and that ain't so bad.
175
00:10:38,581 --> 00:10:40,914
(screaming)
176
00:10:44,141 --> 00:10:46,808
(upbeat music)
177
00:10:59,410 --> 00:11:03,030
- My guest tonight is someone
you all know and fear.
178
00:11:03,030 --> 00:11:05,210
He's the undead prince of real estate.
179
00:11:05,210 --> 00:11:08,091
Ladies and gentleman, it's The Summoner.
180
00:11:08,091 --> 00:11:13,008
(upbeat music)
(cheering)
181
00:11:17,377 --> 00:11:18,724
Welcome to the show.
182
00:11:18,724 --> 00:11:20,224
- Thanks for having me, Jimmy.
183
00:11:23,880 --> 00:11:25,720
- Alright, be honest,
184
00:11:25,720 --> 00:11:27,530
what took you so long to get over here?
185
00:11:27,530 --> 00:11:30,330
- If I told you, Jimmy,
I'd have to kill ya.
186
00:11:30,330 --> 00:11:32,580
(laughing)
187
00:11:32,580 --> 00:11:34,238
- And he means it, folks.
188
00:11:34,238 --> 00:11:37,070
(laughing)
189
00:11:37,070 --> 00:11:39,940
Now, you were in a bit
of controversy recently.
190
00:11:39,940 --> 00:11:43,890
- Oh, uh huh.
191
00:11:43,890 --> 00:11:46,050
- So, what are your plans now
192
00:11:46,050 --> 00:11:49,037
that you've been fired
from the White House?
193
00:11:49,037 --> 00:11:50,757
(laughing)
194
00:11:50,757 --> 00:11:51,590
- Oh, well the president
195
00:11:51,590 --> 00:11:53,640
and I disagreed on a few key issues.
196
00:11:53,640 --> 00:11:57,783
But in all seriousness, Jimmy,
I really was fired from Hell!
197
00:11:57,783 --> 00:12:00,033
(laughing)
198
00:12:02,100 --> 00:12:07,073
- And this is right after
you killed Chadly Derekson
199
00:12:08,010 --> 00:12:09,503
and the Sunset Drive Gang?
200
00:12:11,190 --> 00:12:12,023
- Yep.
201
00:12:12,023 --> 00:12:13,300
- And if I'm not mistaken,
202
00:12:13,300 --> 00:12:16,090
this left a power vacuum
203
00:12:16,090 --> 00:12:18,870
in the regional real estate community.
204
00:12:18,870 --> 00:12:20,370
- Indeed it did.
205
00:12:20,370 --> 00:12:22,760
- So how does it feel to replace them
206
00:12:22,760 --> 00:12:25,781
as the most powerful
entity in house flipping?
207
00:12:25,781 --> 00:12:28,810
(gentle music)
(cheering)
208
00:12:28,810 --> 00:12:31,560
- To be perfectly honest,
it's actually quite humbling.
209
00:12:33,260 --> 00:12:36,340
The whole situation has
given me an opportunity
210
00:12:36,340 --> 00:12:38,913
to reflect on the work that led me here.
211
00:12:41,420 --> 00:12:44,850
I started out with very
little self-confidence,
212
00:12:44,850 --> 00:12:46,690
and it took a while,
213
00:12:46,690 --> 00:12:50,513
but eventually I was able
to embrace who I really was.
214
00:12:51,570 --> 00:12:55,381
And the real me is really
good at sellin' houses.
215
00:12:55,381 --> 00:12:57,631
(cheering)
216
00:13:00,500 --> 00:13:01,600
- Now I'm sure we've got a lot
217
00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:03,640
of young people watching tonight
218
00:13:03,640 --> 00:13:05,140
wanting to make a name for themselves.
219
00:13:05,140 --> 00:13:06,830
Do you have any words of advice
220
00:13:06,830 --> 00:13:09,503
you could offer these
enterprising individuals?
221
00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:12,750
- Never forget where you came from
222
00:13:13,700 --> 00:13:15,963
and it might sound corny, but it's true.
223
00:13:17,260 --> 00:13:20,283
You really can do anything
you put your mind to.
224
00:13:22,989 --> 00:13:26,072
(intense rock music)
225
00:13:27,096 --> 00:13:29,679
(gentle music)
226
00:14:20,264 --> 00:14:22,597
(screaming)
14684
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