Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:03,045 --> 00:00:05,129
- Good. You're awake.
2
00:00:05,172 --> 00:00:07,589
Just in time to meet
our guest of honor,
3
00:00:07,591 --> 00:00:08,924
Your kidney.
4
00:00:08,968 --> 00:00:10,509
- I've heard about you.
5
00:00:10,636 --> 00:00:12,052
You're the--
[groans]
6
00:00:12,096 --> 00:00:14,346
- The kidney-pper.
[thunder rumbles]
7
00:00:14,473 --> 00:00:17,266
Kidney is such an interesting
organ, isn't it?
8
00:00:17,268 --> 00:00:19,852
We've got two,
yet we only need one.
9
00:00:19,854 --> 00:00:21,720
Kind of
like the d'amelio sisters.
10
00:00:21,731 --> 00:00:25,399
If you ask me, dixie can get
d'ameli-outta here.
11
00:00:25,443 --> 00:00:26,942
[laughs]
12
00:00:26,986 --> 00:00:29,611
- Wait, are you trying
stand-up on me?
13
00:00:29,655 --> 00:00:31,071
- [scoffs]
no.
14
00:00:31,198 --> 00:00:34,033
Did you know the average kidney
is the size of a cellphone?
15
00:00:34,076 --> 00:00:38,078
Hello?
Uh, he says "urine" trouble.
16
00:00:38,122 --> 00:00:40,372
- Okay, this
is definitely stand-up.
17
00:00:40,416 --> 00:00:43,959
- It's not stand-up.
If anything, it's alt-comedy.
18
00:00:44,128 --> 00:00:46,587
But no matter,
because I'm getting the light
19
00:00:46,672 --> 00:00:48,630
Leaving your eyes.
20
00:00:48,674 --> 00:00:50,174
- That's creepy.
21
00:00:50,176 --> 00:00:52,301
- Oh, good.
That's what I'm going for.
22
00:00:52,344 --> 00:00:53,343
Blending these tones
23
00:00:53,471 --> 00:00:54,845
Is a hard needle to thread,
you know.
24
00:00:54,972 --> 00:00:56,764
Ah, geez.
25
00:00:56,849 --> 00:00:58,223
Whoa!
26
00:00:58,350 --> 00:01:00,684
- [laughing]
you're killing me.
27
00:01:00,728 --> 00:01:02,978
And I mean that both ways.
28
00:01:03,022 --> 00:01:06,815
- Who's the comedian here?
29
00:01:06,942 --> 00:01:09,860
[adventurous music]
30
00:01:09,904 --> 00:01:17,117
♪
31
00:01:25,961 --> 00:01:27,586
[glass shatters]
32
00:01:32,134 --> 00:01:33,300
- They say no guts, no glory.
33
00:01:33,427 --> 00:01:35,094
Therefore,
the converse must be true.
34
00:01:35,137 --> 00:01:36,470
More guts, more glory.
35
00:01:36,472 --> 00:01:38,972
And guts are the kidney-pper's
bread and butter.
36
00:01:39,100 --> 00:01:41,809
[dramatic music]
37
00:01:41,936 --> 00:01:43,060
Who the hell are you?
38
00:01:43,187 --> 00:01:46,230
- I am the kid-napper.
39
00:01:46,357 --> 00:01:48,065
- So then where are
the kidneys?
40
00:01:48,109 --> 00:01:50,067
- Oh. That's the kidney-pper.
41
00:01:50,194 --> 00:01:52,861
I'm the kid-napper.
I abduct baby goats.
42
00:01:52,863 --> 00:01:55,322
You know, kids. Kid-napper.
43
00:01:55,491 --> 00:01:57,908
- Kang and martinez took
the kidney-pper case.
44
00:01:57,952 --> 00:01:59,952
- So I'm on the lame case?
45
00:01:59,995 --> 00:02:02,037
No, sorry,
I get the big, splashy cases,
46
00:02:02,081 --> 00:02:04,081
The ones on the front page.
47
00:02:04,083 --> 00:02:05,374
I'd be lucky to make
the odds and ends section
48
00:02:05,376 --> 00:02:07,459
With this case,
and that's assuming no one
49
00:02:07,461 --> 00:02:09,128
Grew a pumpkin that looked
like one of the wahlbergs.
50
00:02:09,255 --> 00:02:10,796
- I kind of like this case.
51
00:02:10,798 --> 00:02:13,674
- Kidney-pper spotted on 3rd and nathan lane, closing in.
52
00:02:13,801 --> 00:02:14,925
- That's nearby.
53
00:02:15,052 --> 00:02:16,385
[handcuffs click]
wait here.
54
00:02:16,512 --> 00:02:18,220
We have a front page to ca--
I mean, a killer to catch.
55
00:02:18,222 --> 00:02:20,556
- What?
We can't just leave her here.
56
00:02:20,599 --> 00:02:21,849
What about protocol?
57
00:02:21,892 --> 00:02:22,975
- Protocol--
58
00:02:23,018 --> 00:02:25,727
And I am not saying
this lightly--
59
00:02:25,729 --> 00:02:28,105
Schmotocol.
60
00:02:28,149 --> 00:02:29,314
- Uh, this one I'm gonna need
61
00:02:29,483 --> 00:02:31,358
To take in for,
you know, evidence.
62
00:02:31,360 --> 00:02:34,695
I'm gonna name you
probable cause.
63
00:02:34,697 --> 00:02:37,573
♪
64
00:02:37,700 --> 00:02:38,824
- Drop it kidney-pper.
65
00:02:38,951 --> 00:02:40,033
- [laughing]
- [vocalizing]
66
00:02:40,161 --> 00:02:43,036
I don't want
those cheap laughs.
67
00:02:43,122 --> 00:02:45,122
Whoa, whoa!
[groans]
68
00:02:45,124 --> 00:02:46,957
- Drop the kidney.
- Please.
69
00:02:47,001 --> 00:02:48,959
[goat bleats]
- I have been the kidney-pper.
70
00:02:48,961 --> 00:02:51,295
Tip your waitresses.
71
00:02:52,715 --> 00:02:54,673
- [grunts]
72
00:02:54,717 --> 00:02:56,133
Agh!
73
00:02:57,386 --> 00:03:00,387
He got away because of you!
- Easy, martinez.
74
00:03:00,431 --> 00:03:02,973
I know you're flute's
well-established rival,
75
00:03:02,975 --> 00:03:05,225
But take it down a few steps.
76
00:03:06,228 --> 00:03:08,061
- I put you
on the kid-napper case.
77
00:03:08,189 --> 00:03:09,938
So instead of following
my orders,
78
00:03:10,065 --> 00:03:11,356
You went in search of glory
79
00:03:11,400 --> 00:03:13,734
Just to fill
that damn glory hole of yours.
80
00:03:13,777 --> 00:03:15,903
- And if you're here,
where's the kid-napper, loofus?
81
00:03:16,030 --> 00:03:18,363
That's "loser"
and "doofus" combined.
82
00:03:18,407 --> 00:03:19,531
Keep up, dooser.
83
00:03:19,533 --> 00:03:21,700
- Oh, don't worry,
I cuffed her to a pole.
84
00:03:24,663 --> 00:03:25,829
Don't look at me like that.
85
00:03:25,998 --> 00:03:27,789
I was told it's a myth
they can eat through wood.
86
00:03:27,833 --> 00:03:29,833
Wait, no, that's tin cans.
87
00:03:30,002 --> 00:03:32,127
Oh, and the males
are known to lactate.
88
00:03:32,129 --> 00:03:33,545
Well, join the club.
89
00:03:35,799 --> 00:03:37,424
Is there a baby nearby?
90
00:03:37,551 --> 00:03:39,426
[bell rings]
91
00:03:41,555 --> 00:03:45,807
- Wow, can you imagine
being a stable boy?
92
00:03:45,935 --> 00:03:47,059
[gasps]
they always look
93
00:03:47,102 --> 00:03:48,727
Like they've been
freshly-hugged
94
00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:50,812
By both parents.
95
00:03:50,856 --> 00:03:51,939
[all laugh]
- except for that one.
96
00:03:51,941 --> 00:03:55,108
Oh, somebody's
gonna start crying.
97
00:03:55,236 --> 00:03:57,236
[giggles]
- you guys,
98
00:03:57,363 --> 00:04:00,948
My mom says it was
just an emotional affair.
99
00:04:00,950 --> 00:04:03,659
- Jacket, jayden.
100
00:04:03,661 --> 00:04:05,410
- [grunting]
101
00:04:07,498 --> 00:04:10,290
- [grunts]
- relationships ebb and flow.
102
00:04:10,334 --> 00:04:12,334
They'll be stronger for it.
103
00:04:12,336 --> 00:04:14,795
- An opening
in the stable boys.
104
00:04:14,964 --> 00:04:16,338
This is my shot.
105
00:04:16,382 --> 00:04:18,090
All I have to do
is make it seem like
106
00:04:18,175 --> 00:04:20,801
My family isn't in complete
shambles, and I'm in!
107
00:04:20,844 --> 00:04:23,053
- I absolutely love that
for you obvi,
108
00:04:23,097 --> 00:04:26,807
But stanakin, be careful.
109
00:04:26,934 --> 00:04:28,475
- B--uh, of what?
- I don't know.
110
00:04:28,602 --> 00:04:30,936
Just seems like the right thing
to say to someone
111
00:04:30,980 --> 00:04:33,146
Before they start
a life of deception.
112
00:04:33,941 --> 00:04:35,941
- Look, kang,
about this whole mix-up,
113
00:04:36,068 --> 00:04:39,027
I just wanted to say
I apologize for nothing,
114
00:04:39,154 --> 00:04:41,029
And this will
absolutely happen again.
115
00:04:41,198 --> 00:04:43,448
- Which is why I need
to teach you a lesson.
116
00:04:43,575 --> 00:04:48,662
- I'm putting you
on desk duty.
117
00:04:48,664 --> 00:04:50,372
- Desk duty? You can't do that.
118
00:04:50,499 --> 00:04:52,374
I'm the world's
most smartest detective.
119
00:04:52,501 --> 00:04:55,252
That's how good I am.
I defy the rules of grammar.
120
00:04:55,296 --> 00:04:56,962
I need to be
out solving crimes,
121
00:04:56,964 --> 00:04:58,422
Not desking desks.
122
00:04:58,465 --> 00:04:59,631
- Go ahead.
123
00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:01,133
- I don't even know
how to get into this thing.
124
00:05:01,218 --> 00:05:02,968
Arms first? Feet first?
125
00:05:02,970 --> 00:05:04,636
What, do you wear it?
126
00:05:09,226 --> 00:05:12,019
- Oh, flute,
since you'll be here all day,
127
00:05:12,021 --> 00:05:13,395
Tell anyone who calls for me
128
00:05:13,397 --> 00:05:16,148
That I'm busy out in the field
solving cool crimes.
129
00:05:16,275 --> 00:05:17,482
- Aw, cool crimes!
130
00:05:17,735 --> 00:05:20,068
- Getting free food at diners.
- I love comped coffee.
131
00:05:20,195 --> 00:05:22,070
- Sitting in a parked car
talking out the window
132
00:05:22,156 --> 00:05:24,823
To detectives parked
in the opposite direction.
133
00:05:24,825 --> 00:05:26,241
- The squad car 69.
134
00:05:26,243 --> 00:05:28,952
- And would you mind processing
this paperwork for me?
135
00:05:28,954 --> 00:05:30,829
- [coughs]
okay, that's it.
136
00:05:30,831 --> 00:05:32,456
Whoo--ow. [groans]
137
00:05:32,458 --> 00:05:34,124
Caught the three-hole punch
on my one-ball pouch.
138
00:05:34,251 --> 00:05:36,835
- Let's go get you stocked up
on office supplies.
139
00:05:36,962 --> 00:05:39,421
I hope you like ballpoint pens.
140
00:05:40,591 --> 00:05:42,174
Everything you need
is on that shelf.
141
00:05:42,217 --> 00:05:45,260
And don't do anything stupid,
got it?
142
00:05:45,262 --> 00:05:48,388
- Ugh, I hate when people
tell me what to do.
143
00:05:48,474 --> 00:05:51,558
And I really hate when boxes
tell me what to do.
144
00:05:52,936 --> 00:05:55,687
Mm. I remember mcsnuff.
145
00:05:55,731 --> 00:05:57,022
I bet this holds up.
146
00:05:57,149 --> 00:05:58,607
Everything from the past does.
147
00:06:00,527 --> 00:06:03,320
- Hi, kids. I'm mcsnuff the mystery mutt.
148
00:06:03,364 --> 00:06:06,365
And I'm here to show you how to help me stop crime.
149
00:06:06,367 --> 00:06:08,825
- Ugh, how can I do that
if I'm stuck
150
00:06:08,827 --> 00:06:10,077
In my stupid desk all day?
151
00:06:10,204 --> 00:06:12,120
- You may be asking, "how can I do that
152
00:06:12,247 --> 00:06:14,373
If I'm stuck at my stupid desk all day?"
153
00:06:14,416 --> 00:06:15,457
[gunshot]
154
00:06:15,501 --> 00:06:17,667
Crime doesn't play by the rules,
155
00:06:17,669 --> 00:06:19,127
So why should you?
156
00:06:19,129 --> 00:06:21,713
It's time to take matters into your own paws,
157
00:06:21,840 --> 00:06:24,925
Even if you've been specifically told not to.
158
00:06:24,968 --> 00:06:27,844
[soft dramatic music]
159
00:06:27,971 --> 00:06:33,725
♪ ♪
160
00:06:35,062 --> 00:06:38,021
- This just might be
purr-fect.
161
00:06:38,065 --> 00:06:39,189
But, like, the dog version.
162
00:06:39,233 --> 00:06:41,733
Grr--grr-fect?
Woof--woof-fect?
163
00:06:41,777 --> 00:06:43,318
No, grr-fect. Yeah.
164
00:06:43,445 --> 00:06:45,153
Grr-fect.
165
00:06:49,243 --> 00:06:51,076
[goats bleating]
- this came to me.
166
00:06:51,161 --> 00:06:53,537
But I think
it's fan mail for you.
167
00:06:53,664 --> 00:06:55,497
See? It says "kidney-per."
168
00:06:55,541 --> 00:06:57,624
- Here, they keep sending me
your water bill.
169
00:06:57,668 --> 00:06:59,334
[trash can clatters]
170
00:07:00,129 --> 00:07:02,504
Hmm. Probably just some kid.
171
00:07:02,631 --> 00:07:04,673
- Ooh.
- Not that kind.
172
00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:06,716
Now, where were we?
173
00:07:06,718 --> 00:07:08,927
[ominous music]
174
00:07:08,971 --> 00:07:11,847
- Well, that does it
for another day at work.
175
00:07:11,890 --> 00:07:13,223
Time for casual mode.
176
00:07:13,267 --> 00:07:15,392
[console beeps]
[sighs]
177
00:07:16,812 --> 00:07:18,687
[both whimpering]
178
00:07:18,772 --> 00:07:20,439
- Look at that.
- [gasps]
179
00:07:21,400 --> 00:07:25,110
- Looks like
I argyled too soon.
180
00:07:25,154 --> 00:07:28,697
- Are we clear, boss, at the crime scene?
181
00:07:28,740 --> 00:07:29,990
- This burg needs a hero.
182
00:07:30,117 --> 00:07:31,324
And you either die a hero
183
00:07:31,452 --> 00:07:33,118
Or live long enough
to see yourself
184
00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:35,620
Dress up as a former hero.
185
00:07:35,664 --> 00:07:37,205
Wow. Now I wanna eat a hero.
186
00:07:37,332 --> 00:07:39,541
Not the hero I need,
but the one I deserve,
187
00:07:39,668 --> 00:07:40,834
With extra banana peppers.
188
00:07:40,836 --> 00:07:41,960
- Hey, man,
189
00:07:42,087 --> 00:07:43,170
You're not the only vigilante
190
00:07:43,213 --> 00:07:45,672
Waiting to give
a rooftop monologue.
191
00:07:45,716 --> 00:07:47,174
- Reporting live from downtown
192
00:07:47,301 --> 00:07:49,843
Where there's one word
on everybody's lips, mcsnuff!
193
00:07:49,887 --> 00:07:51,720
- Who is he?
Where'd he come from?
194
00:07:51,722 --> 00:07:53,013
And is he "fixed"?
195
00:07:53,140 --> 00:07:55,056
- And, mcsnuff,
if you're listening,
196
00:07:55,100 --> 00:07:57,392
I'll be reporting later
from the reservoir,
197
00:07:57,519 --> 00:07:59,186
Which I'll have accidentally
fallen into
198
00:07:59,229 --> 00:08:01,813
While wearing a necklace
made of snausages.
199
00:08:01,815 --> 00:08:03,273
- What a bunch of lois lanes
200
00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:05,984
All hot and bothered
for a masked vigilante.
201
00:08:06,153 --> 00:08:08,361
[scoffs] they're not
serious journalists like me.
202
00:08:08,447 --> 00:08:11,072
You know what turns me on?
Honest reporting.
203
00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:12,949
- You got turned on
by the report
204
00:08:12,993 --> 00:08:14,701
Of the gas leak
at the children's hospital?
205
00:08:14,828 --> 00:08:16,244
- A little bit.
A little bit.
206
00:08:16,330 --> 00:08:19,539
- Save me, mcsnuff,
and then upside-down kiss me.
207
00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:22,209
[indistinct chatter]
208
00:08:22,336 --> 00:08:24,503
- Oh, hey, guys.
Is this seat free?
209
00:08:24,546 --> 00:08:28,089
- Why, has the financial burden
of maintaining two homes
210
00:08:28,217 --> 00:08:29,883
Because your parents divorced
211
00:08:29,927 --> 00:08:31,801
Left you unable
to afford a chair?
212
00:08:31,845 --> 00:08:34,012
[all chuckle]
213
00:08:34,056 --> 00:08:35,055
- Not sure if you heard,
214
00:08:35,182 --> 00:08:36,806
But my dad's moved back in,
215
00:08:36,808 --> 00:08:39,434
And my mom's falling hard.
216
00:08:39,561 --> 00:08:40,936
- Hmm.
217
00:08:40,938 --> 00:08:42,354
A second-chance love story
218
00:08:42,481 --> 00:08:44,564
Would be a good addition
to the crew.
219
00:08:44,691 --> 00:08:47,651
Sit. We were about to eat.
220
00:08:47,694 --> 00:08:49,110
My parents made my lunch
221
00:08:49,154 --> 00:08:51,321
With their arms
around each other as equals.
222
00:08:51,365 --> 00:08:53,907
- I have my parents'
leftover wedding cake.
223
00:08:53,951 --> 00:08:56,535
They renew their vows monthly.
224
00:08:56,578 --> 00:08:57,827
Mmm-mmm.
225
00:08:57,955 --> 00:08:59,663
- And you, stan?
226
00:09:01,124 --> 00:09:04,084
- My parents
didn't make me lunch.
227
00:09:05,337 --> 00:09:09,214
Because we're intermittent
fasting as a family.
228
00:09:09,258 --> 00:09:12,384
- My family and I did
a juice cleanse last year.
229
00:09:12,427 --> 00:09:15,220
Mother, father, and I
have never been closer.
230
00:09:15,264 --> 00:09:19,015
Consider yourself
under consideration.
231
00:09:19,059 --> 00:09:22,602
- You can almost taste
that jacket, can't ya?
232
00:09:22,762 --> 00:09:23,812
And that'll have to do
233
00:09:23,939 --> 00:09:26,147
Because you have
no lunch whatsoever.
234
00:09:27,693 --> 00:09:29,109
- In case you all were
wondering where I was,
235
00:09:29,152 --> 00:09:30,360
I was taking a dump.
236
00:09:30,362 --> 00:09:32,112
But I heard
while I was in the bathroom
237
00:09:32,155 --> 00:09:33,989
That mcsnuff busted
another perp?
238
00:09:34,116 --> 00:09:36,700
I'm just saying, he's solved
a lot of your cases.
239
00:09:36,868 --> 00:09:39,077
- Yeah, almost as many cases
240
00:09:39,121 --> 00:09:42,163
As you've made extended poops.
241
00:09:42,207 --> 00:09:43,623
- Well, maybe you'd catch
a criminal too
242
00:09:43,667 --> 00:09:46,167
If you weren't so busy
sliding into my bm's.
243
00:09:46,211 --> 00:09:48,837
If you don't mind,
I've got stuff to do.
244
00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:51,590
There. One paperwork.
245
00:09:51,717 --> 00:09:54,718
- Martinez, where are you at
on the teeth heist?
246
00:09:54,720 --> 00:09:56,052
- Teeth heist?
247
00:09:56,054 --> 00:09:57,887
- Oh, some real pros
at the dental museum.
248
00:09:57,931 --> 00:09:59,347
- Then I gotta run.
249
00:09:59,391 --> 00:10:01,683
- Yeah, where you running,
desk bunny?
250
00:10:01,727 --> 00:10:03,226
- I gotta go, uh...
251
00:10:03,270 --> 00:10:05,395
Take another dump,
a big one too.
252
00:10:05,397 --> 00:10:07,805
And you know how people say,
"don't go in there" afterwards?
253
00:10:07,816 --> 00:10:09,107
Well, this is that
but in advance.
254
00:10:09,109 --> 00:10:10,442
Don't come in there.
255
00:10:10,485 --> 00:10:13,820
Because you will definitely
find a big dump and me.
256
00:10:13,822 --> 00:10:16,781
[heroic music]
257
00:10:16,867 --> 00:10:24,164
♪
258
00:10:40,849 --> 00:10:42,599
- [screams]
259
00:10:44,061 --> 00:10:46,019
Not you, mcsnuff!
260
00:10:47,939 --> 00:10:51,358
Help me, mcsnuff!
261
00:10:51,401 --> 00:10:54,194
- I'm harmony flute,
doing real reporting,
262
00:10:54,237 --> 00:10:55,862
Unlike some desperate hacks
263
00:10:55,989 --> 00:10:57,280
Who throw themselves
into danger.
264
00:10:57,282 --> 00:10:59,616
And I'm here in the grimsburg
subway tunnels,
265
00:10:59,660 --> 00:11:03,203
Which were abandoned years ago
due to a hostile rat takeover.
266
00:11:03,205 --> 00:11:04,829
[rats squeaking]
- uh, harmony.
267
00:11:04,956 --> 00:11:05,997
I think the rats are coming.
268
00:11:06,083 --> 00:11:07,499
[train horn blares]
269
00:11:07,542 --> 00:11:10,418
- Oh, my god.
That is not what I pictured.
270
00:11:10,462 --> 00:11:11,920
Aah!
271
00:11:11,963 --> 00:11:14,089
[gasps]
272
00:11:14,132 --> 00:11:16,800
- So now you are doin'
the lois lane thing?
273
00:11:16,802 --> 00:11:18,760
Good for you.
Let me know how it goes!
274
00:11:18,804 --> 00:11:20,470
Bye!
275
00:11:20,597 --> 00:11:21,805
- [grunts]
276
00:11:21,932 --> 00:11:28,812
♪ ♪
277
00:11:28,855 --> 00:11:31,106
You--you saved me.
278
00:11:31,233 --> 00:11:33,483
- Mcsnuff, you're under arrest
279
00:11:33,527 --> 00:11:35,777
For vigilantism.
280
00:11:35,821 --> 00:11:37,362
- Whee!
281
00:11:37,489 --> 00:11:38,405
- Cool.
282
00:11:38,448 --> 00:11:42,158
- Well, use yours.
- Oh, yeah.
283
00:11:48,834 --> 00:11:49,958
- Mcsnuff did that.
284
00:11:50,085 --> 00:11:51,835
We all saw it, right?
Yeah, we all saw it.
285
00:11:51,878 --> 00:11:55,422
♪ ♪
286
00:11:55,507 --> 00:11:57,507
- Just so you know,
I'm not like the lois lanes.
287
00:11:57,551 --> 00:12:00,385
I'm not gonna be all impressed
because you saved my life
288
00:12:00,470 --> 00:12:01,803
And then took me on a roof
289
00:12:01,930 --> 00:12:04,097
To show me a view of the city
I've never seen before--
290
00:12:04,099 --> 00:12:06,099
Oh, my god,
the town actually looks
291
00:12:06,101 --> 00:12:07,684
Kind of beautiful from up here.
292
00:12:07,811 --> 00:12:10,228
- World looks different
when you're on top of it.
293
00:12:10,355 --> 00:12:13,231
- Oh, your voice.
It's so...Manly.
294
00:12:13,316 --> 00:12:15,859
- Oh, this old thing?
It's just how I talk.
295
00:12:15,986 --> 00:12:18,194
- [chuckles]
and what big eyes you have.
296
00:12:18,321 --> 00:12:19,946
- I actually see
out the nostrils.
297
00:12:20,073 --> 00:12:22,323
- I bet it's hot in there.
- Very.
298
00:12:22,451 --> 00:12:24,617
And I think there are spiders
in the ear part.
299
00:12:24,703 --> 00:12:26,035
Let me give you a ride home.
300
00:12:26,163 --> 00:12:27,704
But if you're ever
in trouble again,
301
00:12:27,706 --> 00:12:28,955
Text the snuffline.
302
00:12:28,999 --> 00:12:31,166
Standard messaging rates apply.
303
00:12:31,209 --> 00:12:34,294
- Thank you.
Or should I say...
304
00:12:34,421 --> 00:12:35,587
Good boy.
305
00:12:39,968 --> 00:12:41,050
- Just think,
306
00:12:41,219 --> 00:12:44,220
It'll be that but on a jacket.
307
00:12:44,306 --> 00:12:47,098
You sure you have the shoulders
for a jacket?
308
00:12:47,142 --> 00:12:50,477
- Oh, look, there's mom.
And mcsnuff?
309
00:12:50,562 --> 00:12:52,187
What are they do--
310
00:12:53,565 --> 00:12:55,106
Oh, my god!
311
00:12:55,233 --> 00:12:56,941
I know you always wanted a dog,
312
00:12:57,068 --> 00:12:58,943
But not like this.
313
00:12:59,070 --> 00:13:01,321
Or maybe like this.
Not judging, okay.
314
00:13:04,576 --> 00:13:06,326
[dramatic music]
315
00:13:06,369 --> 00:13:10,955
- Dad, I-I-I saw mom
kissing mcsnuff!
316
00:13:10,999 --> 00:13:12,373
- Pretty nice, huh?
- Nice?
317
00:13:12,501 --> 00:13:14,408
- No, I mean,
nice for her, not me.
318
00:13:14,419 --> 00:13:16,961
Mcsnuff is obviously
a really cool,
319
00:13:16,963 --> 00:13:18,838
Brave, sexy, clever, cool,
320
00:13:18,882 --> 00:13:20,715
Sensual, heroic, funny, strong,
321
00:13:20,801 --> 00:13:22,383
Fast guy who's extremely cool.
322
00:13:22,427 --> 00:13:26,095
Maybe this town and your mom
need a hero like mcsnuff.
323
00:13:26,223 --> 00:13:29,349
- That dog has even got
my dad under his spell.
324
00:13:29,392 --> 00:13:31,351
Well, I'm not gonna let
some stray
325
00:13:31,353 --> 00:13:33,561
Tear my family apart
and ruin my chance
326
00:13:33,688 --> 00:13:35,313
Of becoming a stable boy.
327
00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:37,690
Maybe what this town
really needs
328
00:13:37,734 --> 00:13:40,109
Is a villain.
329
00:13:40,195 --> 00:13:42,529
- And more bike lanes.
330
00:13:45,033 --> 00:13:47,033
- Check it out.
First he takes your job.
331
00:13:47,193 --> 00:13:49,369
Then he takes your girl.
What's next?
332
00:13:49,496 --> 00:13:51,913
Oh, wait,
you don't have anything else.
333
00:13:51,957 --> 00:13:52,956
Gotcha!
334
00:13:52,999 --> 00:13:54,040
- Actually, I happen to have
335
00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:55,375
A massive amount
of credit card debt,
336
00:13:55,502 --> 00:13:58,586
So not gotcha,
more like backwards gotcha--
337
00:13:58,588 --> 00:14:00,213
"ahctog."
338
00:14:01,299 --> 00:14:04,551
- You sure are interested
in mcsnuff.
339
00:14:04,678 --> 00:14:05,927
Anything you wanna tell me?
340
00:14:06,096 --> 00:14:08,263
- Uh, just that he's doing
great out there.
341
00:14:08,390 --> 00:14:10,306
And I'm doing great
in here on desk duty.
342
00:14:10,433 --> 00:14:12,350
You might as well call me
miley cyrus
343
00:14:12,435 --> 00:14:15,061
Because I've been sitting here
getting the best of one world.
344
00:14:15,105 --> 00:14:17,438
- Don't you mean miley stewart?
345
00:14:17,482 --> 00:14:19,315
- Why would you insinuate
I'm miley stewart,
346
00:14:19,359 --> 00:14:20,775
The character
that miley cyrus played
347
00:14:20,819 --> 00:14:22,944
In "hannah montana,"
who is living life as a teen
348
00:14:23,071 --> 00:14:24,571
While secretly being a popstar,
349
00:14:24,656 --> 00:14:26,698
Allowing her to have
the best of both worlds?
350
00:14:26,741 --> 00:14:28,149
[gasps]
351
00:14:28,243 --> 00:14:31,202
How did you know?
- Because I set all this up.
352
00:14:31,204 --> 00:14:33,288
I led you into the storage room
353
00:14:33,331 --> 00:14:35,081
And wrote "don't knock over" on the box
354
00:14:35,125 --> 00:14:37,250
Because I knew that would make you knock it over.
355
00:14:37,252 --> 00:14:38,918
And then once you saw the costume,
356
00:14:39,045 --> 00:14:40,420
I knew you wouldn't be able to resist
357
00:14:40,455 --> 00:14:42,255
Putting it on and fighting crime.
358
00:14:42,257 --> 00:14:44,132
But as mcsnuff, you wouldn't be getting
359
00:14:44,259 --> 00:14:46,259
Any of the glory, so you'd learn the lesson
360
00:14:46,261 --> 00:14:49,012
That justice is its own reward.
361
00:14:49,097 --> 00:14:50,638
But you never learned it,
362
00:14:50,765 --> 00:14:52,765
So I have
to tell you the lesson.
363
00:14:52,809 --> 00:14:56,311
Flute,
justice is its own reward.
364
00:14:56,354 --> 00:14:57,979
- Ugh, you could have
just told me that
365
00:14:58,023 --> 00:14:59,230
In the first place.
366
00:14:59,232 --> 00:15:01,274
- A true mentor takes
the longest route
367
00:15:01,318 --> 00:15:03,067
To travel
the shortest distance,
368
00:15:03,069 --> 00:15:05,486
Like a butterfly
on a windy day.
369
00:15:05,655 --> 00:15:07,530
- Well, now it seems
like you're just making up
370
00:15:07,532 --> 00:15:08,698
Sayings about mentors.
371
00:15:08,742 --> 00:15:10,033
- Hey, who's the mentor here?
372
00:15:10,076 --> 00:15:11,367
- Starting to think no one is.
373
00:15:11,369 --> 00:15:14,537
But I'm solving crimes,
and everybody loves me,
374
00:15:14,581 --> 00:15:15,705
Including harmony.
375
00:15:15,832 --> 00:15:18,291
- Do they love you or the suit?
376
00:15:19,794 --> 00:15:22,962
♪
377
00:15:23,131 --> 00:15:24,464
- Kang's right.
378
00:15:24,466 --> 00:15:27,425
I do all the work,
but he gets all the glory.
379
00:15:27,469 --> 00:15:29,677
It's time for me
to tell the world that I'm--
380
00:15:29,721 --> 00:15:31,638
[sinister laughter]
381
00:15:31,681 --> 00:15:32,972
Somebody there?
382
00:15:33,099 --> 00:15:36,059
- Follow the warm stream running down your thigh.
383
00:15:36,102 --> 00:15:38,394
No. Down here.
384
00:15:39,189 --> 00:15:41,189
If you tell the truth, it will ruin everything.
385
00:15:41,316 --> 00:15:44,067
People don't love flute. They love mcsnuff.
386
00:15:44,069 --> 00:15:46,069
Especially harmony.
387
00:15:47,989 --> 00:15:49,530
[glass shatters]
388
00:15:49,699 --> 00:15:54,202
- Ha!
[grunting]
389
00:15:54,371 --> 00:15:55,912
- I'm taking you to the pound.
390
00:15:56,039 --> 00:15:57,914
[phone beeps]
391
00:15:57,958 --> 00:15:59,832
See? It's from harmony.
392
00:15:59,960 --> 00:16:01,834
She's in trouble, so she texted me
393
00:16:01,962 --> 00:16:03,670
On the snuffline, not you.
394
00:16:03,672 --> 00:16:07,048
♪
395
00:16:07,217 --> 00:16:09,384
- Oh, he was fighting himself,
396
00:16:09,386 --> 00:16:12,095
Like I was in the original spi--
397
00:16:12,222 --> 00:16:15,223
Wait, is that the whole reason I'm here?
398
00:16:15,350 --> 00:16:17,976
Eh, it's good to get out of the house.
399
00:16:18,103 --> 00:16:20,144
[tires screech]
400
00:16:21,106 --> 00:16:24,440
- Harmony, I came.
Where is she?
401
00:16:24,567 --> 00:16:26,067
"where are you?"
402
00:16:26,194 --> 00:16:28,945
No, not "whales are yummy."
that's not cool or true.
403
00:16:29,030 --> 00:16:30,780
Damn these giant paws!
404
00:16:30,907 --> 00:16:32,949
Ooh.
405
00:16:32,951 --> 00:16:35,159
I deserve a treat.
406
00:16:36,997 --> 00:16:38,788
In the words of the bard...
407
00:16:38,832 --> 00:16:39,914
Ruh-roh.
408
00:16:40,041 --> 00:16:44,502
♪ ♪
409
00:16:44,504 --> 00:16:47,505
- Oh, come on, probable cause,
that's not helping.
410
00:16:47,507 --> 00:16:50,258
But it would make a fun tiktok.
- Summers!
411
00:16:50,343 --> 00:16:52,093
- Yes, sergeant
yergunnawannaseedis?
412
00:16:52,095 --> 00:16:53,970
- You're gonna wanna see this.
413
00:16:53,972 --> 00:16:55,096
[remote clicks]
414
00:16:55,098 --> 00:16:56,973
- And we go now to a live feed
415
00:16:57,100 --> 00:16:59,058
From an abandoned warehouse downtown
416
00:16:59,102 --> 00:17:00,351
Where a crazed lunatic
417
00:17:00,395 --> 00:17:02,520
Claims to have captured mcsnuff.
418
00:17:02,647 --> 00:17:04,147
- People of grimsburg,
419
00:17:04,274 --> 00:17:07,191
It is I, the dognapper.
420
00:17:07,235 --> 00:17:10,945
And I'm here to rid this town
of your favorite hero,
421
00:17:11,072 --> 00:17:14,907
Unless there is a bigger hero
who can save him.
422
00:17:15,035 --> 00:17:18,244
Let's say
a mustachioed detective?
423
00:17:18,288 --> 00:17:21,247
And then anyone who was falling
in love with mcsnuff
424
00:17:21,291 --> 00:17:23,082
Would have to shift their love
425
00:17:23,209 --> 00:17:25,960
To the new, better,
bigger mustachioed hero
426
00:17:25,962 --> 00:17:30,006
Who saved him
because that's how love works!
427
00:17:30,133 --> 00:17:33,217
[laughs evilly]
428
00:17:33,344 --> 00:17:36,387
- Ugh, how did you
knock me out?
429
00:17:36,431 --> 00:17:39,098
Did you slip something
into one of those 24 beers?
430
00:17:39,142 --> 00:17:41,559
- Shut up, you don't get
to ask the questions.
431
00:17:41,561 --> 00:17:44,187
You get to sit and stay
432
00:17:44,230 --> 00:17:46,189
Until my dad comes to save you.
433
00:17:46,232 --> 00:17:49,025
And then everything
will be right again.
434
00:17:49,027 --> 00:17:51,152
- Ugh. I am your dad.
435
00:17:51,196 --> 00:17:53,488
- Oh, really?
[chuckles]
436
00:17:53,490 --> 00:17:56,783
If you're my dad,
then when is my birthday?
437
00:17:56,910 --> 00:17:59,660
- Uh...April-ish?
438
00:17:59,704 --> 00:18:00,828
- Dad!
439
00:18:00,955 --> 00:18:03,414
♪ ♪
440
00:18:03,500 --> 00:18:06,793
- Remember earlier
when I was like, "be careful,"
441
00:18:06,920 --> 00:18:08,377
And you were like, "of what?"
442
00:18:08,379 --> 00:18:10,088
And then I was like,
"I don't know"?
443
00:18:10,131 --> 00:18:12,006
I think this might be it.
444
00:18:12,133 --> 00:18:14,258
- Oh, god,
we've gotta get out of here!
445
00:18:14,260 --> 00:18:16,052
- Hurry, I'm not supposed
to die like this.
446
00:18:16,096 --> 00:18:17,678
I wanna die
in a road warrior battle
447
00:18:17,722 --> 00:18:18,971
After the climate apocalypse.
448
00:18:19,015 --> 00:18:21,516
Please, god,
all I need is five more years.
449
00:18:21,601 --> 00:18:24,644
♪ ♪
450
00:18:24,729 --> 00:18:26,229
[grunts]
451
00:18:27,524 --> 00:18:30,274
[grunting]
452
00:18:32,028 --> 00:18:34,570
- No time to rescue me
and mcsnuff.
453
00:18:34,614 --> 00:18:36,197
Leave me. Take the suit.
454
00:18:36,282 --> 00:18:38,783
Tell the world
it was you all along.
455
00:18:38,910 --> 00:18:41,035
Get the glory and the mom!
456
00:18:41,204 --> 00:18:43,663
- Smart kid. Save me.
457
00:18:48,378 --> 00:18:51,420
- The fact that I'm genuinely
not sure what he's going to do
458
00:18:51,506 --> 00:18:53,047
Is concerning.
459
00:18:55,802 --> 00:18:57,969
- Mcsnuff!
- Hold on!
460
00:18:57,971 --> 00:19:00,221
- I'm coming in,
so you can save me.
461
00:19:00,348 --> 00:19:02,348
[glass shatters]
- what are they doing?
462
00:19:02,475 --> 00:19:04,308
- It's like you said,
those women aren't serious
463
00:19:04,352 --> 00:19:06,018
If they let themselves get
all swept-up like that.
464
00:19:06,062 --> 00:19:07,854
- Maybe I was wrong.
465
00:19:07,856 --> 00:19:09,397
You know,
it felt nice getting swept-up
466
00:19:09,524 --> 00:19:12,066
In the moment,
whisked out of a subway tunnel,
467
00:19:12,068 --> 00:19:14,852
Saying "whee"
and really meaning it.
468
00:19:14,946 --> 00:19:17,780
Who are we to judge them
for what they like?
469
00:19:17,907 --> 00:19:20,074
No, if they wanna
overly spray their hair
470
00:19:20,076 --> 00:19:21,909
And wear poly-fiber
suit jackets,
471
00:19:21,953 --> 00:19:23,327
I fully support them.
472
00:19:23,454 --> 00:19:25,788
Oh, my god,
those women are so flammable.
473
00:19:25,832 --> 00:19:28,249
[explosions and screaming]
474
00:19:28,376 --> 00:19:30,418
- You're a little turned on
right now, aren't you?
475
00:19:30,461 --> 00:19:32,003
- Oh, yeah.
476
00:19:32,964 --> 00:19:35,089
[crowd gasps]
477
00:19:38,094 --> 00:19:38,968
- Where's mcsnuff?
478
00:19:39,095 --> 00:19:42,847
- Mcsnuff is...Is...
479
00:19:42,849 --> 00:19:44,432
- Do it, dad.
480
00:19:44,559 --> 00:19:46,184
Tell them it's you.
481
00:19:46,269 --> 00:19:53,065
♪ ♪
482
00:19:53,193 --> 00:19:57,695
- I am proud to say
that mcsnuff is dead.
483
00:19:57,822 --> 00:19:59,780
[all gasp]
but he'll never die.
484
00:19:59,941 --> 00:20:03,451
[all sigh]
well, no, I mean, he is dead.
485
00:20:03,494 --> 00:20:04,702
[all gasp]
486
00:20:04,746 --> 00:20:06,245
But he can never really die
487
00:20:06,247 --> 00:20:08,956
Because mcsnuff
is inside all of us.
488
00:20:08,958 --> 00:20:10,666
And I know that because,
in a way,
489
00:20:10,668 --> 00:20:12,084
I was inside of him.
490
00:20:12,170 --> 00:20:14,629
- Mcsnuff was gay?
- We're totally okay with that.
491
00:20:14,672 --> 00:20:16,464
- I love cnn's new year's eve!
492
00:20:16,591 --> 00:20:18,132
[cheering]
493
00:20:18,218 --> 00:20:19,967
- Why didn't you tell them,
dad?
494
00:20:20,094 --> 00:20:23,054
You could have been the hero
and gotten mom back.
495
00:20:23,181 --> 00:20:26,849
- Because sometimes
justice is its own reward.
496
00:20:26,851 --> 00:20:27,975
- Yeah, I taught him that.
497
00:20:28,061 --> 00:20:30,811
Mentor. Continue.
498
00:20:30,939 --> 00:20:32,980
- And I guess
I don't need a jacket
499
00:20:33,024 --> 00:20:35,191
To have
a pretty awesome family.
500
00:20:35,235 --> 00:20:38,819
- No idea what you're talking
about, kiddo boy, no idea.
501
00:20:38,947 --> 00:20:40,238
- I've been meaning
to bring this up.
502
00:20:40,365 --> 00:20:42,406
Does your dad
not know your name?
503
00:20:42,533 --> 00:20:46,327
Because he hasn't said it in,
like, a while.
504
00:20:49,374 --> 00:20:50,831
- Prison is tough, though.
It is.
505
00:20:50,833 --> 00:20:52,333
I miss waking up
and immediately seeing
506
00:20:52,460 --> 00:20:53,417
The love of my life,
507
00:20:53,628 --> 00:20:55,253
Who's been sleeping
next to me all night.
508
00:20:55,380 --> 00:20:57,296
Folks, I'm talking
about my phone.
509
00:20:57,423 --> 00:21:00,341
[booing]
510
00:21:00,426 --> 00:21:02,969
- Oof, netflix will give
anybody a comedy special.
511
00:21:03,096 --> 00:21:04,804
- Marvin, the raccoons
are back.
512
00:21:04,931 --> 00:21:06,555
And one of them has
a switchblade.
513
00:21:06,599 --> 00:21:08,182
- Coming!
514
00:21:14,732 --> 00:21:18,818
- [cackling]
515
00:21:18,945 --> 00:21:21,570
So what's up this weekend?
516
00:21:21,572 --> 00:21:24,824
- Just...Hanging around.
517
00:21:24,951 --> 00:21:27,326
[cackling]
518
00:21:28,121 --> 00:21:30,997
- We don't have to talk.
519
00:21:34,711 --> 00:21:36,711
- Bento.
37636
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.