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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,843 --> 00:00:03,768 Tiger & Dragon Episode 2 "Manju Kowai" 2 00:00:04,698 --> 00:00:07,603 Translator: sayapapaya Editor/Timer: sarcasstik 3 00:00:09,418 --> 00:00:12,118 Hello, everyone! My name is Donta! Not to be mistaken with Dontagos!! 4 00:00:12,180 --> 00:00:13,852 Don! Don! Don!! 5 00:00:13,853 --> 00:00:15,662 Allllllright! 6 00:00:19,786 --> 00:00:21,130 It's so nice and quiet in here... 7 00:00:21,516 --> 00:00:22,483 Like a funeral hall! 8 00:00:24,312 --> 00:00:31,290 Um... well, here at the Hayashiyatei rakugo group, we have an odd pupil named Kotora. 9 00:00:32,232 --> 00:00:37,592 He's actually a yakuza, but for some reason, he decided to become an apprentice under Master Donbei. 10 00:00:39,074 --> 00:00:41,385 What the hell do you know about my life? 11 00:00:41,553 --> 00:00:44,495 He's a man with a somewhat complicated past... 12 00:00:44,980 --> 00:00:46,774 However, all men are relatively simple. 13 00:00:47,046 --> 00:00:49,583 When they see an attractive woman, they turn into beasts! 14 00:00:49,687 --> 00:00:52,720 Their thinking capacity shrinks down to the size of a T-rex brain. 15 00:00:53,608 --> 00:00:56,174 If they see a hole, they just want to stick it in! 16 00:00:57,076 --> 00:00:59,460 Oh, have we met before? 17 00:01:00,955 --> 00:01:05,263 Ryuji and Toraji finally made-up, but not for long! 18 00:01:05,550 --> 00:01:08,106 ...and that would be the gist of what happened up til now. 19 00:01:10,230 --> 00:01:11,901 It seems as though I have some time left over. 20 00:01:12,135 --> 00:01:13,599 Well, here's a short story for you! 21 00:01:14,230 --> 00:01:16,603 Mother, how are babies born? 22 00:01:17,066 --> 00:01:20,367 Well, a stork brings them over. 23 00:01:20,697 --> 00:01:22,460 Then how are storks born? 24 00:01:22,739 --> 00:01:26,895 Well, former Giants player, Kouno (stork) brings them over! 25 00:01:27,287 --> 00:01:29,338 Don, don, don! A sacrifice bunt!! 26 00:01:38,235 --> 00:01:39,269 Uh... Tiger and Drag... 27 00:01:47,267 --> 00:01:48,011 "Manju Kowai" 28 00:01:48,289 --> 00:01:51,473 Oh, he's so cute. I just want to eat him up! 29 00:01:51,474 --> 00:01:53,327 You must taste mighty fine!! 30 00:01:53,393 --> 00:01:56,383 Oh, stop, father! It's scary because you look like you really would eat him!! 31 00:01:56,653 --> 00:01:58,648 Have you decided on a name yet? 32 00:01:59,910 --> 00:02:03,941 Well, we have Donta, Donkichi, Dontsuku, Donburi... what was your name again? 33 00:02:04,225 --> 00:02:05,107 It's Udon, sir! 34 00:02:05,609 --> 00:02:06,733 Now, isn't that silly! 35 00:02:06,946 --> 00:02:08,700 Well, you can be Ten-don! (tempura donburi) 36 00:02:08,750 --> 00:02:10,600 Father's already planning to make him into a storyteller! 37 00:02:10,600 --> 00:02:14,267 You'll be the 3rd generation to take over the family business. 38 00:02:14,367 --> 00:02:15,680 ...right Donta? 39 00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:17,349 Donta? 40 00:02:21,743 --> 00:02:24,497 Ryu-chan, Father wants to know what we'll name him. 41 00:02:24,950 --> 00:02:25,950 Oh... 42 00:02:26,313 --> 00:02:29,232 You better hurry up! They'll name him Ten-don! 43 00:02:29,906 --> 00:02:30,845 That's fine. 44 00:02:31,664 --> 00:02:32,493 No, it's not! 45 00:02:32,603 --> 00:02:34,571 H-h-hold on a second! 46 00:02:41,010 --> 00:02:43,433 "Celebrity you WOULDN'T want to sleep with: #1 Hayashiyatei Donta" 47 00:02:43,434 --> 00:02:44,905 He de-throned Degawa...! 48 00:02:45,224 --> 00:02:48,735 Wait, Shishou (master)! We haven't decided if Taro will become a storyteller yet! 49 00:02:48,735 --> 00:02:51,690 Taro? Such an ordinary name... 50 00:02:51,939 --> 00:02:54,207 I think we thought too hard about it, so it ended up as a normal name. 51 00:02:54,772 --> 00:02:56,257 At one point, we even thought of naming him Mozart! 52 00:02:56,857 --> 00:02:59,759 Well, Sayuri-chan, so many happy things have been happening recently... 53 00:03:00,296 --> 00:03:03,898 A new grandchild, Donkichi being promoted to headliner... 54 00:03:03,976 --> 00:03:04,411 What? 55 00:03:04,814 --> 00:03:07,507 Last night, we received a phone call from the head of the association. 56 00:03:07,630 --> 00:03:09,414 And they requested for Donkichi to be promoted. 57 00:03:10,106 --> 00:03:13,707 Oh...well, that was unexpected... 58 00:03:13,828 --> 00:03:14,734 I'm sorry I beat you to it. 59 00:03:14,735 --> 00:03:18,072 Not at all! Become a headliner or a bedpan-liner...anything you wish! 60 00:03:18,151 --> 00:03:20,489 When is it going to be publicly announced? I'll be the opening act for ya! 61 00:03:20,817 --> 00:03:21,578 Dear... 62 00:03:22,074 --> 00:03:25,439 With a chubby, Woody Allen headliner like this, we wouldn't be able to fill the whole theater! 63 00:03:25,440 --> 00:03:27,990 I, the prince of the rakugo world, will liven things up! 64 00:03:28,446 --> 00:03:30,846 Well, did ya hear that? It'll be great! 65 00:03:34,233 --> 00:03:35,274 Yo! 66 00:03:35,636 --> 00:03:37,925 I heard you got a new boyfriend? 67 00:03:38,266 --> 00:03:40,627 Weeeell, to tell you the truth, I'm the one spreading the rumors. 68 00:03:40,651 --> 00:03:43,663 How nice! I guess I gotta dress up and find myself a girl, too! 69 00:03:44,010 --> 00:03:44,589 Hey! 70 00:03:45,042 --> 00:03:47,074 Whoa! I thought they were mannequins! 71 00:03:47,941 --> 00:03:49,426 What the hell are you mad about? 72 00:03:50,066 --> 00:03:51,244 I ain't mad. 73 00:03:51,502 --> 00:03:52,584 See...you are! 74 00:03:52,741 --> 00:03:55,003 I'm mad because you keep saying I'm mad when I'm not mad! 75 00:03:55,003 --> 00:03:56,019 So you are mad then! 76 00:03:56,020 --> 00:03:57,020 I keep telling you, I ain't mad!! 77 00:03:57,021 --> 00:04:00,289 Calm down you guys! Both of you seem plenty mad to me. 78 00:04:00,736 --> 00:04:02,647 Come here and listen! 79 00:04:03,461 --> 00:04:05,029 WHAAAAAT?! 80 00:04:05,577 --> 00:04:07,912 You took my Megumi-chan...? 81 00:04:08,123 --> 00:04:10,000 Oh! You're mad about Megumi?? 82 00:04:10,000 --> 00:04:11,400 You only realized that now?! 83 00:04:11,400 --> 00:04:12,700 Actually, I keep telling you I ain't mad! 84 00:04:12,843 --> 00:04:14,473 Oh, well there ain't nothing going on between us, idiot! 85 00:04:14,474 --> 00:04:15,662 You mean you guys haven't done it yet? 86 00:04:15,697 --> 00:04:17,564 Oh, well we already did that...twice. 87 00:04:18,232 --> 00:04:20,283 He never asked how many times!! 88 00:04:20,977 --> 00:04:21,896 Oh, sorry. Hold on a sec. 89 00:04:22,649 --> 00:04:27,005 Hello? Toracchi? I'm at the Tokyo Tower right now! 90 00:04:27,676 --> 00:04:31,813 Yup! I'm on my break. You wanna eat dinner together tonight? 91 00:04:31,841 --> 00:04:34,473 Huh?! Quit calling me over stupid stuff like that! 92 00:04:34,895 --> 00:04:37,750 Huh?! What's your problem?! 93 00:04:38,038 --> 00:04:41,400 Huh?! Who do you think you are, my girlfriend?! 94 00:04:42,030 --> 00:04:43,949 Alright, see ya. 95 00:04:45,878 --> 00:04:46,680 Where were we? 96 00:04:48,083 --> 00:04:49,259 Nevermind already... 97 00:04:49,569 --> 00:04:51,518 Why are you giving up?! 98 00:04:51,715 --> 00:04:55,896 How can you let a boring guy like this steal that girl with the beautiful, long legs?! 99 00:04:56,365 --> 00:04:58,118 You're 100% more funny than this guy!! 100 00:04:58,118 --> 00:04:58,781 Idiot! 101 00:04:59,181 --> 00:05:06,603 It doesn't matter if I'm funny or not! A sense of humor is meaningless to her! 102 00:05:07,435 --> 00:05:08,096 What?? 103 00:05:08,563 --> 00:05:09,645 You like her?? 104 00:05:10,789 --> 00:05:13,241 How could you let yourself be suckered in by her, too?!! 105 00:05:13,522 --> 00:05:14,770 Actually, why didn't you all just do her? 106 00:05:15,523 --> 00:05:18,553 It makes perfect sense if you've had a few drinks and had dinner together, right? 107 00:05:18,760 --> 00:05:20,019 Stop trying to look good, and just do it! 108 00:05:20,148 --> 00:05:21,473 Say something! 109 00:05:22,098 --> 00:05:23,858 I can't... 110 00:05:23,981 --> 00:05:26,940 Our brains work in an entirely different way, so I just don't know what to say... 111 00:05:27,019 --> 00:05:29,207 Maybe I did do something wrong...? 112 00:05:31,523 --> 00:05:34,709 Okay, sorry. I won't do it anymore if you love Megumi so much... 113 00:05:34,831 --> 00:05:36,958 I keep telling you that I don't love her! 114 00:05:37,094 --> 00:05:38,338 When did I ever say that?? 115 00:05:38,434 --> 00:05:40,283 You never really said it, but it's pretty obvious to me! 116 00:05:40,370 --> 00:05:42,497 I'd tell you if I really fell in love with her!! 117 00:05:42,769 --> 00:05:43,643 Just leave me alone! 118 00:05:46,334 --> 00:05:46,757 Hey! 119 00:05:47,807 --> 00:05:49,024 What are YOU doing here? 120 00:05:49,238 --> 00:05:50,442 What did ya have to come for? 121 00:05:51,396 --> 00:05:55,006 Hey! Wait a minute! It's been a while, right? 122 00:05:55,808 --> 00:05:59,406 It's good for brothers to have a chat once in awhile. 123 00:06:00,210 --> 00:06:02,776 If you feel uncomfortable, Kotora and I will help out. 124 00:06:03,010 --> 00:06:04,272 I'm leaving. 125 00:06:04,273 --> 00:06:05,273 What?? 126 00:06:05,274 --> 00:06:06,623 I still have my night job to go to. 127 00:06:07,056 --> 00:06:08,255 See you guys later. 128 00:06:15,075 --> 00:06:16,302 Sit down. 129 00:06:17,686 --> 00:06:18,633 Alright. 130 00:06:21,795 --> 00:06:24,800 Hey Ginjiro, what's Kyuga-san been up to lately? 131 00:06:25,131 --> 00:06:25,800 What? 132 00:06:26,873 --> 00:06:29,862 He hasn't been coming to the office, and he doesn't answer his phone... 133 00:06:30,430 --> 00:06:31,441 You didn't hear? 134 00:06:31,711 --> 00:06:32,330 What? 135 00:06:32,825 --> 00:06:33,600 He got married. 136 00:06:35,375 --> 00:06:39,583 And she's only 18! A freakin high school student til this spring! 137 00:06:40,127 --> 00:06:41,657 It's a crime if you ask me! 138 00:06:41,775 --> 00:06:42,507 Jun-kun... 139 00:06:42,877 --> 00:06:45,973 I thought Kyuga-san was dating your older sister? 140 00:06:46,380 --> 00:06:49,805 He was. Pops was all set on the idea of them getting married. 141 00:06:50,308 --> 00:06:55,042 I dunno how to put this lightly, but my sis is a little "iffy," ya know what I mean? 142 00:06:56,467 --> 00:07:00,382 I ain't approvin of this, Kyuga! 143 00:07:00,430 --> 00:07:03,514 You ruined my precious Shizuka-chan! 144 00:07:03,722 --> 00:07:04,775 I'm terribly sorry, sir. 145 00:07:04,874 --> 00:07:08,105 If you're sorry, why the hell'd you go and do something like this!? 146 00:07:09,307 --> 00:07:12,453 Making her cry...!! 147 00:07:13,539 --> 00:07:17,764 Sis has been bar hoppin around Roppongi ever since she was in high school... 148 00:07:17,764 --> 00:07:22,096 So, it's not like she's "Miss Innocent," but Pops is just steamin right now... 149 00:07:23,937 --> 00:07:25,576 You'll probably get called in tomorrow. 150 00:07:31,530 --> 00:07:33,008 It's your pops... 151 00:07:33,285 --> 00:07:36,701 I know it's not exactly the most mature thing to do... 152 00:07:37,022 --> 00:07:42,968 But it's our duty as yakuza to go all the way in a situation like this. 153 00:07:44,780 --> 00:07:47,690 If not, how can I live up to my reputation? 154 00:07:48,993 --> 00:07:53,138 Do you absolutely have to live up to this reputation of yours? 155 00:07:54,539 --> 00:07:55,602 Of course! 156 00:07:57,005 --> 00:07:58,046 So what am I supposed to do? 157 00:07:58,316 --> 00:08:01,384 Cause a "happening" at Kyuga's wedding party. 158 00:08:02,968 --> 00:08:03,907 ....what? 159 00:08:04,135 --> 00:08:04,847 What? 160 00:08:05,106 --> 00:08:06,035 I dunno...just seems kinda...minor. 161 00:08:06,346 --> 00:08:08,741 Why don't we just threaten his fiance or somethin? 162 00:08:08,798 --> 00:08:09,632 Idiot! 163 00:08:10,171 --> 00:08:12,572 I would never do something like that to Kyuga! 164 00:08:13,080 --> 00:08:16,503 Come onnnn! We're just gonna teach him a little lesson! 165 00:08:16,988 --> 00:08:19,998 Then, Shizuka-chan will feel better! Right? 166 00:08:20,246 --> 00:08:21,659 Yup! I'll feel a lot better! 167 00:08:23,517 --> 00:08:26,081 Tora, I'm couting on ya! 168 00:08:30,214 --> 00:08:32,730 Donkichi's gonna be the next headliner. 169 00:08:35,373 --> 00:08:36,802 I see... 170 00:08:38,362 --> 00:08:39,834 Is that why you're all depressed? 171 00:08:39,853 --> 00:08:43,422 Don't be stupid! He's turning 40 this year...it's about time! 172 00:08:43,744 --> 00:08:47,313 Donkichi was a train station master till he was 30, right? 173 00:08:47,633 --> 00:08:50,283 Being promoted to headliner in just 10 years is a commendable feat. 174 00:08:50,634 --> 00:08:51,583 Don... 175 00:08:51,800 --> 00:08:53,553 Don't get down over every little thing! 176 00:08:54,110 --> 00:08:56,729 Getting up on stage isn't all what being a storyteller's about, right? 177 00:08:56,868 --> 00:09:00,015 He's right. You can continue doing rakugo, no matter how old you get. 178 00:09:00,812 --> 00:09:02,073 You should keep making your tv appeara... 179 00:09:02,227 --> 00:09:05,147 "Keeping at it" is what got me the title: "The #1 Celebrity you wouldn't want to sleep with." 180 00:09:05,383 --> 00:09:06,880 I just gotta try harder... 181 00:09:07,456 --> 00:09:08,851 I'm a father of two, ya know? 182 00:09:10,027 --> 00:09:13,026 I'll try harder...I can do it! 183 00:09:14,880 --> 00:09:19,052 What do you think you're doing?! You're in no position to be sitting there sippin shochu! 184 00:09:19,156 --> 00:09:19,882 Me? 185 00:09:19,989 --> 00:09:21,012 Yes, you! 186 00:09:21,186 --> 00:09:25,434 It's all your fault that I have that stupid title... opening that store and putting Dad into debt! 187 00:09:25,906 --> 00:09:30,457 Make women want me! Make women with legs longer than 80 cm want me! 188 00:09:32,380 --> 00:09:33,733 That's more like you now... 189 00:09:43,167 --> 00:09:44,115 Don-chan...you know..? 190 00:09:44,292 --> 00:09:44,983 What? 191 00:09:44,983 --> 00:09:45,784 You know..?! 192 00:09:45,860 --> 00:09:46,943 Oh, right! 193 00:09:48,075 --> 00:09:49,890 Pull yourself together, dear! 194 00:09:50,964 --> 00:09:52,728 Right, right... 195 00:09:53,304 --> 00:09:58,911 Well, Donkichi over here has finally made it to headliner! 196 00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:01,716 Yay! Isn't that great?! Yaay! 197 00:10:01,954 --> 00:10:03,859 Would you shut up already? You're too loud! 198 00:10:05,078 --> 00:10:08,892 Here at Hayashiya-tei, he will be our first ever headliner! 199 00:10:09,155 --> 00:10:14,002 So we'll be announcing this to the public soon, and we need to put together a program. 200 00:10:14,627 --> 00:10:15,978 Are you going to perform too, Tora-chan? 201 00:10:16,070 --> 00:10:17,843 Nope, no opening acts. Only those above the 2nd rank. 202 00:10:18,113 --> 00:10:19,338 By the way...who are you? 203 00:10:19,438 --> 00:10:20,252 I am Megumi! 204 00:10:20,300 --> 00:10:21,436 She's Megumi! 205 00:10:21,803 --> 00:10:22,670 So who are you again? 206 00:10:22,772 --> 00:10:24,410 I'll just kick her out...hey, leave! 207 00:10:24,510 --> 00:10:26,953 What are you doing, Tora-chan!? Why can't she stay?? 208 00:10:27,053 --> 00:10:28,444 How long are your legs? 209 00:10:28,657 --> 00:10:31,522 Are they longer than 80 cm? They are, aren't they? 210 00:10:37,103 --> 00:10:45,071 Nevermind that...Tora-chan, you'll have to learn a new story. I've still got that debt to pay back. 211 00:10:46,268 --> 00:10:47,474 38,000 yen left! 212 00:10:48,413 --> 00:10:50,394 Oh, I know! We should try "Manju Kowai." (Scary Manju) 213 00:10:50,589 --> 00:10:52,998 What? I don't like scary stories! 214 00:10:54,653 --> 00:10:58,590 Shishou, is this "Manju Kowai" story really a scary story? 215 00:10:58,897 --> 00:11:05,272 Well, it's an opening act story, but with the right acting skills, it'll cause a roar of laughter. 216 00:11:06,024 --> 00:11:09,335 I'll be telling it today, so why don't you come by and watch? 217 00:11:11,182 --> 00:11:12,502 A roar of laughter...? 218 00:11:19,443 --> 00:11:20,912 Torapyon, this manju is really yummy! 219 00:11:20,950 --> 00:11:22,308 Hey, shut up for a second. 220 00:11:23,681 --> 00:11:28,758 Thank you all for coming. Edokko have a tendancy to bear with things out of pride... 221 00:11:28,976 --> 00:11:30,595 Oh, he's telling "Manju Kowai" today! 222 00:11:31,922 --> 00:11:35,862 Ahh, it's so nice to soak in the bath! 223 00:11:36,688 --> 00:11:39,820 Oh, sir? You're in the bath already? 224 00:11:40,780 --> 00:11:43,576 Mr. Edokko customer, isn't the water a bit cold? 225 00:11:43,836 --> 00:11:46,997 What do you mean?? The temperature's perfect! 226 00:11:47,445 --> 00:11:50,115 Really? Mr. Edokko customer? 227 00:11:50,899 --> 00:11:52,724 Actually, we haven't even heated the baths up yet... 228 00:11:53,973 --> 00:11:55,871 That was just the tip of the iceberg... 229 00:11:57,311 --> 00:12:02,866 Come on in! Today we're just gonna sit around and chat for awhile. Come on in! 230 00:12:03,410 --> 00:12:06,399 Alright, I'll get some sashimi over here, and we'll have a few drinks! 231 00:12:06,708 --> 00:12:09,809 That's what someone rich would say! All we need is some hot tea. 232 00:12:10,088 --> 00:12:11,120 Hot tea you say?? 233 00:12:11,366 --> 00:12:13,799 Hey! What took you so long!! 234 00:12:14,344 --> 00:12:15,748 I was scared out of my mind! 235 00:12:16,430 --> 00:12:17,264 What? 236 00:12:17,432 --> 00:12:20,452 I was takin a short cut when I came face to face with a big blue-green snake! 237 00:12:21,422 --> 00:12:24,576 It was stickin its tongue out and starin at me! 238 00:12:24,824 --> 00:12:30,361 I was scared shitless. I thought he was gonna swallow me whole!! 239 00:12:37,545 --> 00:12:45,525 It's nothing to laugh so loud about. Every human being has at least one thing he's afraid of. 240 00:12:46,151 --> 00:12:48,956 I just can't stand the sight of a slug! 241 00:12:49,987 --> 00:12:51,245 What about you, Kicchan? 242 00:12:51,681 --> 00:12:53,710 For me...it would be a frog. 243 00:12:55,425 --> 00:12:57,105 I'm afraid of spiders! 244 00:12:57,618 --> 00:12:59,288 I hate okera (mole crickets)! 245 00:12:59,446 --> 00:13:00,974 You're always okera (penniless), anyway! 246 00:13:02,315 --> 00:13:03,632 I don't like ants. 247 00:13:04,201 --> 00:13:06,051 I hate horses... 248 00:13:06,179 --> 00:13:08,686 Wow, you folks are afraid of the weirdest things! 249 00:13:08,999 --> 00:13:11,946 Hey Matsu, what are you afraid of? 250 00:13:12,113 --> 00:13:13,100 Shut up! 251 00:13:14,393 --> 00:13:16,047 It's nothing to get angry about!! 252 00:13:17,124 --> 00:13:19,264 I can't stand listening to this stupidty anymore! 253 00:13:19,714 --> 00:13:25,363 What, you're afraid of a snake, huh? All you gotta do is give it a little squeeze and make a headband out of it! 254 00:13:25,797 --> 00:13:29,363 Afraid of spiders, huh? I could just throw a few in my natto (fermented soy beans) and eat em up! 255 00:13:29,608 --> 00:13:31,609 The spider webs would make it even more stringy! 256 00:13:31,708 --> 00:13:36,208 Afraid of ants, huh? I'd just eat em like sesame seeds on top my bowl of rice! 257 00:13:36,434 --> 00:13:39,037 Even though these sesame seeds wouldn't stay still...! 258 00:13:39,260 --> 00:13:45,272 Whether it be a horse or a cricket, no matter how many legs it may have, I'd eat it! It's the truth! 259 00:13:45,642 --> 00:13:52,784 Really...well then Matsu, you'd eat this table right here, too? 260 00:13:56,083 --> 00:14:01,846 Yeah, I don't see why I couldn't. But then again, I don't eat things that might hurt me. 261 00:14:03,288 --> 00:14:04,876 I don't get it. Why was that funny? 262 00:14:05,598 --> 00:14:07,094 How the hell would I know? 263 00:14:07,672 --> 00:14:09,333 So you ain't afraid of anything at all? 264 00:14:09,549 --> 00:14:10,382 Nope! 265 00:14:10,798 --> 00:14:12,118 Really?? 266 00:14:12,608 --> 00:14:18,317 How many times do I gotta tell ya!? Oh wait, you're so persistent that I just remembered one thing! 267 00:14:18,650 --> 00:14:20,010 I'm afraid of just one thing! 268 00:14:20,378 --> 00:14:23,037 Oh you are, huh? What is it?? 269 00:14:23,318 --> 00:14:24,668 I'm not telling you! 270 00:14:25,152 --> 00:14:26,484 Why not?? 271 00:14:26,896 --> 00:14:28,219 No, you'll laugh at me. 272 00:14:28,681 --> 00:14:30,312 No I won't! Come on! 273 00:14:31,044 --> 00:14:35,797 Alright...I'll tell you then. I'm scared of manju... 274 00:14:37,766 --> 00:14:39,405 See! You're all laughing!! 275 00:14:39,589 --> 00:14:42,114 You're scared of manju?? That food with sweet anko beans in the middle?? 276 00:14:42,645 --> 00:14:43,614 Stop! Stop!! 277 00:14:47,050 --> 00:14:48,914 Now I have the shivers!! 278 00:14:49,834 --> 00:14:51,204 I'm gonna lie down for awhile! 279 00:14:53,665 --> 00:14:54,899 I'm so scared of manju!! 280 00:14:57,432 --> 00:15:00,360 Isn't that weird?? He's scared of manju! 281 00:15:00,657 --> 00:15:03,102 Hey! Why don't we play a little trick on him! 282 00:15:03,402 --> 00:15:06,702 Yeah! I've always had a bone to pick with that guy! 283 00:15:07,041 --> 00:15:11,101 He always teases me about my appearance! What are we going to do? 284 00:15:11,422 --> 00:15:16,306 Buy a whole bunch of manju and set them all around his pillow! 285 00:15:18,204 --> 00:15:27,985 Think about it! He gets so scared just talking about it. Imagine how it would be if actually saw a real manju!! 286 00:15:28,254 --> 00:15:31,008 It would be death by manju!! 287 00:15:33,287 --> 00:15:34,854 Alright, let's play a little game! 288 00:15:36,257 --> 00:15:39,197 There is one manju in here that contains wasabi horseradish! 289 00:15:39,744 --> 00:15:42,486 Wait a minute! Nobody told me about this!! 290 00:15:43,685 --> 00:15:46,698 Hey Matsu! Wake up, Matsu! 291 00:15:47,398 --> 00:15:51,987 What is it?? I was sleeping so soundly!! 292 00:15:53,436 --> 00:15:57,982 Oh! It's manju! I'm so scared!! 293 00:16:02,564 --> 00:16:04,430 I'm sooo scared!! 294 00:16:05,141 --> 00:16:07,390 It's sooo spicy!! 295 00:16:08,802 --> 00:16:12,649 Oh no! Look at all these different kinds of manju! I'm so scared!! 296 00:16:15,840 --> 00:16:17,160 It's so spicy!! 297 00:16:17,288 --> 00:16:20,513 It's chestnut manju! So scaaaared! 298 00:16:21,938 --> 00:16:28,483 It's soba manju! Soba manju, the most scary manju in the world...! 299 00:16:39,453 --> 00:16:44,889 Heeey...he keeps saying that he's scared, but he keeps on eating them! 300 00:16:45,250 --> 00:16:47,095 I think we've been had!! 301 00:16:47,716 --> 00:16:51,075 Hey Matsu! What is it that you're really most afraid of in this world?! 302 00:16:52,426 --> 00:16:55,044 Right now? I'm most afraid of a nice cup of hot tea. 303 00:17:00,397 --> 00:17:02,805 Thank you very much. 304 00:17:10,509 --> 00:17:12,023 Good work everyone! 305 00:17:21,408 --> 00:17:22,603 "Most hated celebrity" 306 00:17:25,050 --> 00:17:27,203 "Celebrity you wouldn't want as a boyfriend: #1 Hayashiyatei Donbei" 307 00:17:27,203 --> 00:17:30,096 "Celebrity you wouldn't want to work with: #2 Hayashiyatei Donbei" 308 00:17:30,302 --> 00:17:32,497 "Celebrity you think will disappear after this year: #1 Hayashiyatei Donbei" 309 00:17:32,769 --> 00:17:35,028 "Celebrity you want to see disappear: #1 Hayashiyatei Donbei" 310 00:17:35,595 --> 00:17:37,306 "The most hated celebrity, runs away with the top title!" 311 00:17:46,764 --> 00:17:52,864 Hello! This is Yamazaki's cellphone! Yamazaki is unable to answer the phone right now, so I, Megumi will... 312 00:17:52,864 --> 00:17:54,199 Hey! Don't answer my phone! 313 00:17:54,678 --> 00:17:55,709 Hello?! 314 00:17:58,061 --> 00:18:02,112 I'm sorry to interrupt your afternoon drive with your little "sex friend"... 315 00:18:02,659 --> 00:18:04,761 Idiot, what are you talking about? 316 00:18:06,878 --> 00:18:09,435 Do you have any plans for tonight? 317 00:18:09,733 --> 00:18:12,775 Alright, I'll meet you at the oden cart at 10, then. 318 00:18:13,043 --> 00:18:16,591 Wait! You better come alone! 319 00:18:16,941 --> 00:18:19,685 Oden! Oden! Oden at 10!! 320 00:18:23,199 --> 00:18:24,488 Alright. 321 00:18:25,427 --> 00:18:28,231 I want fish cake!! Okay, Torajiro?? 322 00:18:28,427 --> 00:18:30,737 Yeah, whatever...could you just decide on one name to call me from now on? 323 00:18:32,052 --> 00:18:33,825 It's been bothering me for awhile now. 324 00:18:34,134 --> 00:18:38,395 After you left, my brother seemed really depressed, and lately he seems really suffocated when he's on tv. 325 00:18:38,651 --> 00:18:39,446 Really? 326 00:18:39,669 --> 00:18:41,133 He seems the same to me. 327 00:18:41,604 --> 00:18:43,943 He's gonna be the opening act for Donkichi's show soon. 328 00:18:44,654 --> 00:18:45,932 That ain't good. 329 00:18:46,181 --> 00:18:47,233 It ain't? 330 00:18:47,281 --> 00:18:51,662 He does a good job while he's practicing, but once he gets up on stage, he falls apart. 331 00:18:51,862 --> 00:18:53,332 He can't handle pressure very well. 332 00:18:53,486 --> 00:18:55,374 But they love him on tv... 333 00:18:55,553 --> 00:18:58,842 Those are just spur-of-the-moment gags, but in actuality, he's on the verge of a breakdown. 334 00:19:00,009 --> 00:19:01,885 He may not look it, but he's really pessimistic. 335 00:19:02,289 --> 00:19:04,072 Things have gotten better since he got married... 336 00:19:04,282 --> 00:19:05,758 Even though his wife used to be much more famous than him... 337 00:19:05,817 --> 00:19:06,823 Famous? 338 00:19:07,143 --> 00:19:09,434 You didn't know?! She used to be an enka singer. 339 00:19:09,670 --> 00:19:10,721 Whaat?? 340 00:19:11,002 --> 00:19:12,166 Here. 341 00:19:15,322 --> 00:19:18,033 "Crying on Kokusai Dori (International Street)"..."2"? 342 00:19:18,174 --> 00:19:20,257 Part 2 was more popular than the first one. 343 00:19:20,446 --> 00:19:23,735 His father's a master-comedian, his little brother's a genius rakugo storyteller... 344 00:19:23,974 --> 00:19:27,550 And on top of that, his wife was a famous singer...no wonder his stress is building up. 345 00:19:28,399 --> 00:19:29,606 Are you done with practice? 346 00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:40,397 Oh...stop it! 347 00:19:40,625 --> 00:19:43,469 Why not?? I had to wait for half a year! Come on...! 348 00:19:43,777 --> 00:19:48,668 No! It'll wake up Saya, and I still have to feed Taro. 349 00:19:51,783 --> 00:19:54,607 I understand...you wouldn't want to sleep with Japan's most hated celebrity... 350 00:19:55,964 --> 00:19:56,667 What? 351 00:19:56,857 --> 00:20:01,784 I understand...it would be terrible to sleep with someone that no one wants to sleep with. 352 00:20:04,163 --> 00:20:07,534 No one would want to sleep with a woman that slept with a man that no one wants to sleep with. 353 00:20:07,669 --> 00:20:11,521 In other words, the only man that would sleep with a woman that slept with a man that no one wants to sleep with... 354 00:20:11,690 --> 00:20:13,198 Is the man that no one wants to sleep with. 355 00:20:13,775 --> 00:20:15,224 What are you talking about? 356 00:20:16,077 --> 00:20:16,994 I don't know... 357 00:20:17,922 --> 00:20:19,491 Damn...I don't know anymore. 358 00:20:20,882 --> 00:20:26,289 Ryu-chan, you should rest for awhile. You're starring in 7 shows right now, right? 359 00:20:26,833 --> 00:20:29,357 You're pushing yourself too hard...you must be tired. 360 00:20:29,616 --> 00:20:31,307 Why don't you cut back a little? 361 00:20:32,296 --> 00:20:33,328 Tsuru-chan... 362 00:20:33,432 --> 00:20:38,730 My old producer asked me if I wanted to make a come-back soon. 363 00:20:40,030 --> 00:20:45,960 Of course not immediately, but Mother has agreed to look after the children for me... 364 00:20:49,295 --> 00:20:50,648 I'm going to bed. 365 00:20:53,774 --> 00:20:55,455 Ryu-chan! 366 00:20:57,482 --> 00:20:59,411 Can I move on to the main issue at hand now? 367 00:21:01,030 --> 00:21:03,690 Wait a minute...then what was all this talk up til now? An introduction?? 368 00:21:04,112 --> 00:21:08,132 I think I might be in love... 369 00:21:11,174 --> 00:21:14,989 I told you that I'd tell you when I really did fall in love, right? 370 00:21:15,099 --> 00:21:17,185 Well, I've been thinking about it a lot since then... 371 00:21:17,382 --> 00:21:20,845 I think I might be in love, after all... 372 00:21:22,187 --> 00:21:24,011 What am I supposed to do about that...? 373 00:21:25,612 --> 00:21:28,041 Oh, wait. Are you talking about Megumi? 374 00:21:28,796 --> 00:21:30,695 Oh, damn you scared me. I thought you were talking about me! 375 00:21:30,910 --> 00:21:31,932 You stupid or somethin?! 376 00:21:32,052 --> 00:21:33,780 Why are ya telling this to me anyway? Why don't you go tell HER! 377 00:21:35,139 --> 00:21:37,489 What the hell is she doing here?? I told you to come alone! 378 00:21:37,687 --> 00:21:39,264 It's not my fault! She wouldn't go home! 379 00:21:39,619 --> 00:21:40,469 I'll go get her. 380 00:21:40,520 --> 00:21:41,449 No!! Don't! 381 00:21:41,928 --> 00:21:44,990 I know I don't stand a chance at this point if she's obediently waiting in the car! 382 00:21:48,708 --> 00:21:52,807 "I'll be waiting at the office." -Kyuga 383 00:21:53,336 --> 00:21:55,428 What's with this "gal moji" (codes that high school girls use)? 384 00:21:55,687 --> 00:21:56,318 I gotta go. 385 00:21:56,504 --> 00:21:57,406 Whaaat?! 386 00:21:57,406 --> 00:21:59,147 Watch my car. 387 00:22:02,660 --> 00:22:04,051 Nice to meet you! 388 00:22:04,206 --> 00:22:05,959 We've met before!! 389 00:22:06,249 --> 00:22:10,310 Oh, sorry. Your face just isn't impressionable enough for me to remember. 390 00:22:12,157 --> 00:22:14,754 Why don't ya come over here and say that!? 391 00:22:15,183 --> 00:22:16,700 You ain't gotta hide it from me. 392 00:22:16,937 --> 00:22:18,453 The boss told ya to do something, didn't he? 393 00:22:21,084 --> 00:22:24,229 Yea...at the wedding party... 394 00:22:24,867 --> 00:22:26,176 Cause a ruckus? 395 00:22:26,528 --> 00:22:30,128 Not a ruckus...just a "happening." 396 00:22:31,867 --> 00:22:34,084 How minor... 397 00:22:35,343 --> 00:22:36,569 So what are ya plannin? 398 00:22:37,168 --> 00:22:41,115 Planning? I'm still obligated to you for taking me in... 399 00:22:42,189 --> 00:22:44,777 If you side with me, you'll make boss lose face. 400 00:22:46,494 --> 00:22:47,804 This is about reputation again... 401 00:22:48,197 --> 00:22:50,115 Her parents are really strict people! 402 00:22:50,594 --> 00:22:54,264 It took me, a 100% yakuza, 6 months to finally convince them to let me marry her! 403 00:22:54,655 --> 00:22:58,008 If this is gonna end in a catastrophe, I wanna know what's going on! 404 00:22:58,378 --> 00:22:59,463 Alright, Toraaa??! 405 00:22:59,548 --> 00:23:00,394 Yes, sir! 406 00:23:00,712 --> 00:23:04,198 Can't you think of a good plan? 407 00:23:04,744 --> 00:23:06,072 A good plan, sir? 408 00:23:06,353 --> 00:23:09,137 I want daikon, a boiled egg, and fish cake!! 409 00:23:09,212 --> 00:23:11,748 Daikon, boiled egg, and fish cake, huh?? 410 00:23:12,667 --> 00:23:13,795 You want a square fish cake, too?? 411 00:23:13,813 --> 00:23:14,586 Yeah! 412 00:23:15,017 --> 00:23:18,235 Okay! Do you want one that's full of juice, or one that's as puffy as can be?? 413 00:23:18,367 --> 00:23:20,028 One that's as puffy as can be!! 414 00:23:20,546 --> 00:23:21,835 Why don't you just get out of the car?! 415 00:23:21,941 --> 00:23:23,620 But it's cooold... 416 00:23:23,717 --> 00:23:25,146 You're from Aomori, ain't ya?! 417 00:23:29,524 --> 00:23:31,203 It's sooo cold! 418 00:23:31,282 --> 00:23:32,968 Legs long like a king crab!! 419 00:23:33,075 --> 00:23:33,815 Are you drunk? 420 00:23:33,849 --> 00:23:34,927 No, I'm not! 421 00:23:35,336 --> 00:23:36,771 ...or maybe I am! 422 00:23:37,162 --> 00:23:40,329 Actually, why don't you sit down? 423 00:23:41,669 --> 00:23:46,184 I don't think I can win when there's such a height difference... 424 00:23:49,832 --> 00:23:52,224 It's so coooold! 425 00:23:53,894 --> 00:23:57,522 You'll get warm after you drink and eat a little. 426 00:23:57,957 --> 00:24:00,963 You think Toravolta will get jealous if he sees us? 427 00:24:01,081 --> 00:24:02,247 You call him Toravolta? 428 00:24:02,432 --> 00:24:03,165 Nope. 429 00:24:04,108 --> 00:24:05,471 Let's eat! 430 00:24:10,053 --> 00:24:13,898 Um...Am I that unmemorable? 431 00:24:16,711 --> 00:24:19,596 I'd rather be hated than forgotten about... 432 00:24:20,174 --> 00:24:23,206 After all, I'm the younger brother of the #1 celebrity that no one wants to sleep with. 433 00:24:27,091 --> 00:24:28,380 Sorry! 434 00:24:28,845 --> 00:24:32,433 I'll tell you beforehand, but I can never get straight to the point. 435 00:24:33,322 --> 00:24:35,440 You remember when you dissed my clothes that one time? 436 00:24:36,113 --> 00:24:39,094 It totally pissed me off, so I hunted you down! 437 00:24:39,425 --> 00:24:43,817 I guess my face isn't very impressionable compared to all those other guys... 438 00:24:44,631 --> 00:24:49,870 But if I absolutely had no feelings for you, I wouldn't have gone through all that trouble to find you... 439 00:24:53,426 --> 00:24:59,570 See...look. I haven't gotten rid of it yet... 440 00:25:01,783 --> 00:25:03,578 Half the reason is that I don't have any money... 441 00:25:04,792 --> 00:25:12,419 But I just couldn't get over you...like a joke with a forgotten punchline... 442 00:25:16,768 --> 00:25:18,924 Sorry! You probably wouldn't understand... 443 00:25:22,746 --> 00:25:25,572 Umm...uh... 444 00:25:28,106 --> 00:25:29,066 Ryuji...? 445 00:25:30,469 --> 00:25:34,150 Oh right, Ryuji-san. You must be a very kind person. 446 00:25:36,386 --> 00:25:37,428 Really? 447 00:25:38,378 --> 00:25:46,230 You know what? Country girls like me are attracted to kind men like you...uh... 448 00:25:47,284 --> 00:25:47,985 Ryuji. 449 00:25:49,702 --> 00:25:53,527 Yes, kind men like you, Ryuji-san. 450 00:25:54,346 --> 00:25:59,305 But at the same time, we're attracted to cold men like Toracchi. 451 00:26:00,192 --> 00:26:04,026 Even though we should really date guys like you...uh... 452 00:26:04,144 --> 00:26:05,014 Ryuji. 453 00:26:05,637 --> 00:26:09,807 Yes, guys like you, Ryuji-san. 454 00:26:11,884 --> 00:26:13,445 Uhmmm.... 455 00:26:13,550 --> 00:26:15,774 It's Ryuji!! You have got to be doing that on purpose!! 456 00:26:15,851 --> 00:26:18,371 You're really good at fast comebacks. 457 00:26:18,610 --> 00:26:21,638 Getting praised over something like that doesn't make me feel better at all... 458 00:26:22,515 --> 00:26:24,795 I totally just realized something amazing!! 459 00:26:24,808 --> 00:26:25,686 Huh? 460 00:26:26,155 --> 00:26:31,483 Tora-chan and you, Ryuji-san, are Tiger and Dragon!! 461 00:26:32,620 --> 00:26:34,155 Yea...I guess you're right. 462 00:26:34,363 --> 00:26:38,012 So that's why you guys get along so well!! Isn't that cool?! 463 00:26:38,775 --> 00:26:42,949 Yeah, it's great...I knew that but kept quiet about it... 464 00:26:43,197 --> 00:26:45,755 So why don't you keep quiet and listen to what I have to say?!! 465 00:26:46,632 --> 00:26:47,561 Yes, sir. 466 00:26:59,013 --> 00:27:01,660 Oooh! I fell asleep!! 467 00:27:01,677 --> 00:27:02,692 Stay asleep!! 468 00:27:02,758 --> 00:27:04,779 I had a dream that I peed my pants... 469 00:27:06,622 --> 00:27:08,973 Oh no! I really DID pee my pants!! 470 00:27:09,655 --> 00:27:12,490 I'm gonna go home now... I have to wake up early tomorrow. 471 00:27:12,759 --> 00:27:13,759 I had fun! 472 00:27:16,771 --> 00:27:18,368 I had fun too... 473 00:27:19,298 --> 00:27:21,605 Let's drink together again... 474 00:27:21,812 --> 00:27:22,575 Yea! 475 00:27:27,947 --> 00:27:29,649 Can I get your phone number? 476 00:27:30,411 --> 00:27:32,019 Just ask Tora-chan! 477 00:27:35,111 --> 00:27:36,649 Like I could, stupid. 478 00:27:40,594 --> 00:27:43,703 Hayashiyatei Donkichi has become headliner! 479 00:27:44,437 --> 00:27:45,817 It's an announcement, everyone. 480 00:27:45,931 --> 00:27:47,014 Liven up a little, won't ya? 481 00:27:47,183 --> 00:27:48,009 Outta my way. 482 00:27:50,792 --> 00:27:53,273 He's first to perform! Where the heck did Donta disappear to?! 483 00:27:53,398 --> 00:27:54,337 Maybe he ran away. 484 00:27:54,544 --> 00:27:57,886 He doesn't take us seriously...just because he appears on tv... 485 00:27:58,750 --> 00:28:01,267 Why, who might you folks be...? 486 00:28:03,887 --> 00:28:08,525 I'll have you know that none of my pupils would ever do such a thing as not show up for a performance. 487 00:28:08,740 --> 00:28:16,286 No matter how bad they might be...I've taught them to do the very best they can...! 488 00:28:17,019 --> 00:28:18,103 Please calm down! 489 00:28:20,291 --> 00:28:22,609 What do you mean calm down?! This is YOUR announcement program! 490 00:28:23,117 --> 00:28:25,910 How can you stay so calm...! Uh oh...nosebleed... 491 00:28:26,652 --> 00:28:30,065 Donta's missing. He's the opening act but he hasn't shown up yet. 492 00:28:30,218 --> 00:28:33,185 He's your brother, ain't he? Don't you have an idea of where he might be hiding? 493 00:28:36,962 --> 00:28:40,533 It's the 5 minute warning! Hit the drum! 494 00:28:41,997 --> 00:28:45,568 Oh no, the drum for the first act has sounded! Who's going up there? 495 00:28:45,668 --> 00:28:46,388 I will! 496 00:28:46,388 --> 00:28:47,395 No, stupid! Stop! 497 00:28:47,536 --> 00:28:48,536 Did ya just call me stupid?! 498 00:28:48,751 --> 00:28:50,669 Oh, I'm sorry. My mistake... 499 00:28:51,680 --> 00:28:55,402 I've memorized about an 8th...er maybe a 6th of "Scary Manju," so I'll be fine... 500 00:28:55,639 --> 00:28:59,380 A 6th?! Only a 6th?! Let's not do this...okay?? 501 00:29:00,494 --> 00:29:01,990 I know, I'll go! 502 00:29:02,228 --> 00:29:05,777 No! There's no way you can go out there first! 503 00:29:06,904 --> 00:29:08,129 I'll go! 504 00:29:12,670 --> 00:29:13,588 Tsuruko-chan? 505 00:29:19,608 --> 00:29:20,567 Tsuru-chan? 506 00:29:22,591 --> 00:29:25,020 Oh my god, it's Tenkouji Tsuruko!!! 507 00:29:29,173 --> 00:29:30,340 Damn...she's so popular! 508 00:29:31,333 --> 00:29:31,891 Let's go! 509 00:29:32,438 --> 00:29:36,572 I went to Sensoji, looking for you... 510 00:29:38,378 --> 00:29:42,519 Took the aquatic bus to Sumidagawa... 511 00:29:44,211 --> 00:29:49,127 From Azuma bridge to Kappa bridge... 512 00:29:50,035 --> 00:29:54,487 From Rokku nakamise to Hanayashiki... 513 00:29:55,986 --> 00:29:56,814 Donta-san! 514 00:29:58,159 --> 00:30:02,035 Honey, oh, dear, you, Doooonta! 515 00:30:02,603 --> 00:30:07,932 Oh, dear, Donta, honey, oh, you... 516 00:30:08,180 --> 00:30:08,912 Did you find him? 517 00:30:09,600 --> 00:30:12,426 I looked all over Asakusa, but there's no sight of him. 518 00:30:13,313 --> 00:30:15,160 I can only think of one more place that he might be. 519 00:30:15,572 --> 00:30:16,326 Where?? 520 00:30:16,532 --> 00:30:17,925 Right there. 521 00:30:18,719 --> 00:30:25,388 Searching for you...all over Kokusai Dori (International Street)! 522 00:30:33,005 --> 00:30:34,005 Bro... 523 00:30:40,284 --> 00:30:41,626 What the hell are you going to do? 524 00:30:42,120 --> 00:30:45,408 You nearly ruined such an important day for Donkichi! 525 00:30:46,612 --> 00:30:50,258 I wouldn't be surprised if you get expelled! 526 00:30:50,934 --> 00:30:52,691 Maybe you're not meant for this job. 527 00:30:53,266 --> 00:30:55,110 Why don't you just stick to your TV appearances!? 528 00:30:55,216 --> 00:30:56,143 Wait a minute! 529 00:30:57,536 --> 00:31:01,055 He really does want to do rakugo... 530 00:31:01,141 --> 00:31:02,955 You've left this household already, so mind your own business! 531 00:31:02,955 --> 00:31:05,362 Are you planning to kick him out, too?! This is exactly like what happened to me!! 532 00:31:05,389 --> 00:31:06,959 His circumstances are different from yours! 533 00:31:07,090 --> 00:31:08,668 He has a wife and two kids... 534 00:31:08,720 --> 00:31:10,827 That's exactly why I'm telling you not to expel him! 535 00:31:11,415 --> 00:31:13,336 You can do classics no matter how old you get! 536 00:31:14,948 --> 00:31:16,304 It ain't that simple!! 537 00:31:16,902 --> 00:31:17,798 Give me a break!! 538 00:31:18,568 --> 00:31:23,918 You say that classics can always be done when you're older, so what are you saying about my life?! 539 00:31:24,038 --> 00:31:27,897 I told classics from when I was really young! Are you saying my whole life has been a waste of time?! 540 00:31:28,300 --> 00:31:29,517 You've got to be kidding me! 541 00:31:30,931 --> 00:31:32,446 Don't talk big just because you're young! 542 00:31:32,791 --> 00:31:34,238 You're just finding an easy way out of things! 543 00:31:34,294 --> 00:31:39,807 Whether it be making a living on clothes or starring on television...you're just wasting your lives away! 544 00:31:40,311 --> 00:31:46,031 You think you can tell classics when you're older with absolutely no experience?! 545 00:31:46,076 --> 00:31:47,998 When did I ever say that I was gonna do classics? 546 00:31:49,576 --> 00:31:52,712 When the hell did I ever say that I was gonna do rakugo?! Stupid old man!! 547 00:31:53,437 --> 00:31:55,608 Nobody's takin over the family business! 548 00:31:56,063 --> 00:32:00,077 As long as you keep acting like you're the big boss, nobody's gonna follow in your footsteps!! 549 00:32:00,207 --> 00:32:03,899 How dare you talk to your own father like that?! You little punk!! 550 00:32:04,094 --> 00:32:06,900 It pisses me off because I don't know whether you're my father or my teacher!! 551 00:32:09,115 --> 00:32:09,941 Whaddya do that for? 552 00:32:10,108 --> 00:32:11,148 Nevermind. 553 00:32:11,429 --> 00:32:17,160 This is my problem. The more you get heated, the harder it is for me. 554 00:32:17,479 --> 00:32:18,502 Ryu-chan... 555 00:32:19,634 --> 00:32:21,796 I apologize for today. 556 00:32:22,771 --> 00:32:25,955 Tsuruko, Donkichi-san, I'm terribly sorry! 557 00:32:31,273 --> 00:32:34,850 But please, allow me time to think more about my future. 558 00:32:39,211 --> 00:32:41,982 And...mother's crying. 559 00:32:42,270 --> 00:32:43,498 W-w-what?? 560 00:32:45,299 --> 00:32:47,174 Oh! I'm so sorry, Sayuri-chan! 561 00:32:47,893 --> 00:32:52,571 I keep telling you not to make Sayuri-chan cry!! 562 00:32:55,970 --> 00:33:00,589 It wasn't me, right?? I'm asking you whether it was my fault or not! 563 00:33:05,076 --> 00:33:06,200 Hey, Ryuji! 564 00:33:14,970 --> 00:33:18,442 That was pretty uncool, wasn't it? Sorry you had to see that. 565 00:33:20,073 --> 00:33:22,982 No. It wasn't uncool at all. 566 00:33:25,815 --> 00:33:29,196 You're probably gonna say that I'm too straightforward again... 567 00:33:30,216 --> 00:33:37,283 But, ain't it great having parents? 568 00:33:39,624 --> 00:33:41,150 You really are straightforward... 569 00:33:41,338 --> 00:33:43,965 Rakugo is interesting, but so is experiencing having a family. 570 00:33:44,748 --> 00:33:51,655 I have experience in neither, so I'm learning all about it right now from your old man. 571 00:33:54,985 --> 00:33:56,149 So, Ryuji... 572 00:33:57,955 --> 00:33:58,825 What? 573 00:34:01,050 --> 00:34:02,648 Come back more often... 574 00:34:03,608 --> 00:34:06,174 And show me a whole lot more of what I just saw. 575 00:34:08,844 --> 00:34:11,453 I'll never have a chance against you, after all. 576 00:34:12,371 --> 00:34:13,629 Whaddya mean? 577 00:34:14,250 --> 00:34:15,920 Megumi-chan was saying... 578 00:34:16,209 --> 00:34:17,127 What? 579 00:34:17,241 --> 00:34:20,839 She said that you and I are a tiger and... 580 00:34:21,097 --> 00:34:21,728 Hello? 581 00:34:21,783 --> 00:34:22,963 You're answering it?! 582 00:34:24,280 --> 00:34:27,389 Whaddya gonna do about it, Tora? The wedding party's next week. 583 00:34:27,659 --> 00:34:28,999 I know, I know. 584 00:34:29,137 --> 00:34:32,004 Actually, the Boss has been tellin me the exact same thing. 585 00:34:34,309 --> 00:34:36,357 Maybe we'll have to postpone it after all... 586 00:34:36,611 --> 00:34:37,786 Whaaat? 587 00:34:38,034 --> 00:34:41,152 You better do it on schedule. I'll try to smooth things over with my pops. 588 00:34:41,427 --> 00:34:44,797 No. I can't put you guys out of your way... 589 00:34:46,211 --> 00:34:47,428 What are you doing? 590 00:34:48,213 --> 00:34:49,409 This...? 591 00:35:05,953 --> 00:35:08,683 Tiger, tiger, jirettaiga! 592 00:35:12,385 --> 00:35:14,968 Uhh...all Edokko... 593 00:35:15,117 --> 00:35:16,494 You're telling "Manju Kowai," aren't ya? 594 00:35:17,541 --> 00:35:20,592 Yea, I'm going to tell "Manju Kowai." 595 00:35:24,520 --> 00:35:33,293 Well, around the Shinjuku, Kabuki-cho area, there once was a yakuza who was both attractive and smart. 596 00:35:33,456 --> 00:35:40,879 However, one day, he decided to wed a young girl that was half his age. This caused some big problems. 597 00:35:41,014 --> 00:35:46,036 The yakuza had been in a fairly long relationship with his boss's daughter. 598 00:35:46,796 --> 00:35:51,514 So he tried to think of a good plan... 599 00:35:52,422 --> 00:35:53,980 "100 things you shouldn't do at a wedding party" 600 00:35:54,147 --> 00:35:56,249 Why would some guy like this become famous? 601 00:35:58,765 --> 00:36:01,465 Hey, isn't that one of the Hayashitei sons? 602 00:36:01,756 --> 00:36:05,642 His jokes are lame...women especially hate him. 603 00:36:07,096 --> 00:36:08,708 Poor guy... 604 00:36:09,130 --> 00:36:10,934 Kyuga's new wife really hates him, too. 605 00:36:12,588 --> 00:36:14,135 It's like her body reacts negatively to him. 606 00:36:14,527 --> 00:36:18,157 Just by seeing his face, she feels like throwing up, and goes into a seizure. 607 00:36:18,373 --> 00:36:21,653 Really?? Well, that's good to know! 608 00:36:21,910 --> 00:36:24,787 So... he called his men over to tell them this info. 609 00:36:25,107 --> 00:36:30,385 I heard that Kyuga's girl hates Donta! 610 00:36:30,602 --> 00:36:31,663 Is that so...? 611 00:36:31,902 --> 00:36:34,116 Well, he's disliked all over the country... 612 00:36:35,037 --> 00:36:40,754 So why don't we invite Donta to the wedding party and cause a commotion!? 613 00:36:41,173 --> 00:36:42,092 Whaaaat?! 614 00:36:42,555 --> 00:36:44,701 Do you have any idea what would happen if we did that?! 615 00:36:45,350 --> 00:36:48,278 It'll be quite entertaining now, won't it?! 616 00:36:49,512 --> 00:36:50,778 Perform at a wedding party? 617 00:36:50,809 --> 00:36:54,656 Yea, and he's been real good to me, so I just couldn't turn him down. 618 00:36:55,425 --> 00:36:57,692 Sure, I'll do it...but are you sure you want me to perform? 619 00:36:58,353 --> 00:36:59,809 Wouldn't you rather have Donkichi? 620 00:37:00,004 --> 00:37:02,304 No! It's gotta be you! 621 00:37:03,902 --> 00:37:06,001 Bro, it has to be you!! 622 00:37:06,808 --> 00:37:14,013 This entertainer...his name Anrakutei, Donta, was famous for being disliked around Edo. 623 00:37:14,365 --> 00:37:17,501 Although being disliked is also a measure of how famous, or well, infamous he is... 624 00:37:17,994 --> 00:37:19,987 But he had his worries... 625 00:37:21,191 --> 00:37:25,026 So, he went to his younger brother, the shopkeeper Ryu, for help. 626 00:37:25,844 --> 00:37:27,125 Can you teach me rakugo? 627 00:37:27,465 --> 00:37:28,535 Are you serious? 628 00:37:28,619 --> 00:37:30,360 Yeah, teach me a real good classy one. 629 00:37:31,558 --> 00:37:32,156 Please! 630 00:37:33,143 --> 00:37:36,084 And so...as some of you may already have realized... 631 00:37:38,089 --> 00:37:39,718 What? Donta's here?? 632 00:37:40,769 --> 00:37:43,003 He's here, isn't he?! I wanna take a picture with him! 633 00:37:43,029 --> 00:37:45,402 She was what you would call a fanatic... 634 00:37:45,407 --> 00:37:48,313 No! When Donta comes, no matter how happy you may be, you gotta pretend that you hate his guts. 635 00:37:48,561 --> 00:37:50,114 Why?! I don't understand! 636 00:37:50,661 --> 00:37:52,283 He's really into S&M... He's a total masochist! 637 00:37:52,327 --> 00:37:53,193 Masochist? 638 00:37:53,659 --> 00:37:56,278 So the more you're mean to him, the better his performance will be! 639 00:37:56,529 --> 00:37:58,012 That makes no sense at all! 640 00:38:00,067 --> 00:38:02,799 What?! No! Stop!! 641 00:38:03,357 --> 00:38:04,512 To tell you the truth... 642 00:38:04,768 --> 00:38:06,854 Without any clue of what was going on... 643 00:38:07,216 --> 00:38:10,907 Toshiko-san! Congratulations! Don! Don! Don... 644 00:38:11,523 --> 00:38:13,379 Don't do the Don Dons! You're supposed to be classy today! 645 00:38:15,144 --> 00:38:17,835 There's gonna be a "happening" today..! 646 00:38:19,669 --> 00:38:25,957 Now we will have a special guest performance! You've seen him on tv...! 647 00:38:26,247 --> 00:38:28,710 Please give a warm welcome to Mr. Hayashiyatei Donta! 648 00:38:36,442 --> 00:38:37,596 Hello! 649 00:38:38,403 --> 00:38:41,884 Nooooo!! 650 00:38:42,860 --> 00:38:43,726 Thank you very much! 651 00:38:46,222 --> 00:38:48,931 Today, I would like to perform a rakugo which I never do on television... 652 00:38:49,088 --> 00:38:50,504 NO!! 653 00:38:51,029 --> 00:38:54,546 It seems one member of the audience does not like the idea... 654 00:38:54,926 --> 00:38:56,235 Don't worry about it! Just go on! 655 00:38:57,625 --> 00:39:00,287 A long time ago, when this city was known as Edo... 656 00:39:00,465 --> 00:39:02,064 NOOO!!! 657 00:39:03,749 --> 00:39:05,256 Toshiko, yell even louder! 658 00:39:05,749 --> 00:39:08,348 Donta's SO GROSS!!!! 659 00:39:12,718 --> 00:39:16,017 ...SO GROSS....!! 660 00:39:18,820 --> 00:39:19,470 More. 661 00:39:19,720 --> 00:39:21,411 Donta sucks!!! 662 00:39:21,459 --> 00:39:22,512 More! 663 00:39:22,684 --> 00:39:25,952 I HATE DONTA!!! 664 00:39:26,600 --> 00:39:28,435 Take off your clothes, Donta! 665 00:39:28,435 --> 00:39:29,523 Don't do it, Donta! 666 00:39:29,722 --> 00:39:30,907 Alright, it's off! 667 00:39:31,125 --> 00:39:33,386 Don don don! Dontagon! 668 00:39:36,263 --> 00:39:38,219 Wait right there!! 669 00:39:40,403 --> 00:39:41,558 Just watch. 670 00:39:41,951 --> 00:39:47,074 That was Donta's final straw, and as if a fish out of water, no... 671 00:39:47,890 --> 00:39:50,632 More like a broken dam, he went into a rage! 672 00:39:52,057 --> 00:39:54,102 This is my real job! 673 00:39:54,150 --> 00:39:55,521 Hold it right there, bride! 674 00:39:56,117 --> 00:39:56,766 No! 675 00:39:58,028 --> 00:40:00,163 I'm going in! 676 00:40:00,298 --> 00:40:04,659 I'm administering a finger enema to the bride! 677 00:40:05,872 --> 00:40:08,241 Sir, I have finished administering a finger enema! 678 00:40:08,640 --> 00:40:10,785 Alright! Next target, the groom's crotch! 679 00:40:11,226 --> 00:40:11,908 Yessir! 680 00:40:12,038 --> 00:40:14,801 Reaaady...seeeet...dodge-dick! 681 00:40:17,345 --> 00:40:18,622 Hmm...a moment of silence. 682 00:40:19,187 --> 00:40:21,406 Don! Don! Don! Doncharakan! 683 00:40:21,880 --> 00:40:24,098 This is great! 684 00:40:24,177 --> 00:40:27,358 Daddy, are you sure she really hates this? 685 00:40:28,407 --> 00:40:29,304 Oh shit! 686 00:40:30,635 --> 00:40:32,832 Medetai (congratulations) Mede-Titanic! 687 00:40:32,858 --> 00:40:34,540 Hey...she seems to be enjoying this! 688 00:40:34,927 --> 00:40:36,590 What's going on here, Ginjiro?! 689 00:40:37,025 --> 00:40:39,093 This isn't what you said! 690 00:40:39,764 --> 00:40:40,642 Oops...? 691 00:40:41,091 --> 00:40:43,745 Oh I get it...it's "Manju Kowai" 692 00:40:47,647 --> 00:40:50,739 Donta you're so gross...too gross! 693 00:40:52,363 --> 00:40:55,519 Hey...you guys tricked me, didn't ya? 694 00:40:56,044 --> 00:40:57,172 What are you talking about, sir? 695 00:40:57,190 --> 00:40:58,201 Don't play dumb! 696 00:40:58,398 --> 00:41:00,555 She keeps saying she hates him, but she's having a ball! 697 00:41:00,626 --> 00:41:04,445 You're a fan of Donta's, aren't ya?! 698 00:41:04,832 --> 00:41:07,793 Whaat?? I hate this guy! 699 00:41:07,851 --> 00:41:08,951 Don't lie! 700 00:41:11,381 --> 00:41:15,245 Then tell me what else you hate! 701 00:41:16,093 --> 00:41:26,235 Umm...I also hate houses with big yards, German-style kitchens, and plasma TVs... 702 00:41:28,539 --> 00:41:30,214 Excuse me... 703 00:41:44,254 --> 00:41:46,964 Alright...I'll buy em for you. 704 00:41:50,542 --> 00:41:54,259 Thank you very much, sir! 705 00:41:55,108 --> 00:41:59,807 I was soo scared!! 706 00:42:00,320 --> 00:42:03,434 Oh! I also hate adorable babies! 707 00:42:04,016 --> 00:42:06,222 Well, I guess you'll just have to take care of that one yourselves! 708 00:42:15,445 --> 00:42:18,382 Good job, Tora-chan! 709 00:42:27,507 --> 00:42:29,518 Here's your Coke-float! 710 00:42:30,002 --> 00:42:33,369 I think you did a fairly good job, Kotora. 711 00:42:33,545 --> 00:42:36,080 Really?? Thank you very much! 712 00:42:36,312 --> 00:42:38,443 Oh, well here's this month's lesson fee. 713 00:42:41,445 --> 00:42:44,701 Oh right...I hate nothing more than money! 714 00:42:45,578 --> 00:42:46,331 What? 715 00:42:47,405 --> 00:42:50,039 That Anrakutei Donta that came up in your story... 716 00:42:50,803 --> 00:42:54,241 That was my son Donta, wasn't it? And that shopkeeper Ryu is... 717 00:42:55,588 --> 00:42:57,156 Sorry sir, I can't disclose that info. 718 00:42:57,775 --> 00:42:58,703 Why not?? 719 00:43:05,358 --> 00:43:06,460 Where's this month's payment?! 720 00:43:06,560 --> 00:43:07,829 Oh! Right! I was just about to... 721 00:43:08,005 --> 00:43:09,253 Where's the envelope?! 722 00:43:09,523 --> 00:43:12,142 Oh no! I forgot all about it! Is this alright?? 723 00:43:12,579 --> 00:43:13,527 "Do not try this at home" 724 00:43:14,528 --> 00:43:16,269 Things don't seem to have changed at all. 725 00:43:16,334 --> 00:43:18,172 Well, at least he can work without any doubts now. 726 00:43:21,983 --> 00:43:24,054 Alright, I'd like to move on to the main issue at hand now... 727 00:43:24,202 --> 00:43:25,256 Again? Huh? 728 00:43:26,833 --> 00:43:30,060 Well, the other night, I got to spend some time alone with Megumi, right? 729 00:43:31,297 --> 00:43:32,969 We made a promise to see each other again... 730 00:43:35,484 --> 00:43:37,999 And so...I'd like to ask you for her phone number... 731 00:43:38,124 --> 00:43:39,456 Are you even listening?! 732 00:43:39,765 --> 00:43:40,745 Look! 733 00:43:44,249 --> 00:43:48,219 That's not any ordinary fellow, is it? 734 00:43:48,591 --> 00:43:50,293 That ain't no ordinary fellow! 735 00:43:52,912 --> 00:43:56,653 Are you Hayashiyatei Kotora? 58487

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