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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,212 --> 00:00:05,214 (Cell phone ringing) 2 00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:10,844 Hello, this is Dwight schrute. 3 00:00:10,928 --> 00:00:11,929 Hello? 4 00:00:12,012 --> 00:00:13,680 Hello. This is Dwight. 5 00:00:13,764 --> 00:00:15,516 Yes! Hello? Hello? 6 00:00:15,599 --> 00:00:17,267 We do have that. Hold on one second. 7 00:00:17,351 --> 00:00:18,352 Jim, what are you doing? 8 00:00:18,435 --> 00:00:19,770 And how many would you like? 9 00:00:19,853 --> 00:00:20,938 Hang that up right now. 10 00:00:21,021 --> 00:00:22,981 Absolutely. I can get that out to you immediately. 11 00:00:23,065 --> 00:00:24,316 This man is an imposter. 12 00:00:24,399 --> 00:00:26,461 Do not do business with him. This is not Dwight schrute. 13 00:00:26,485 --> 00:00:31,448 Dwight left his cell phone on his desk, so, naturally, I paired it to my headset. 14 00:00:31,615 --> 00:00:33,700 (Cell phone ringing) 15 00:00:33,784 --> 00:00:36,411 Okay, fine, I'll just let it go to voicemail. 16 00:00:38,830 --> 00:00:40,707 Hello, this is Dwight. Hey, is this Dwight? 17 00:00:40,791 --> 00:00:41,792 Yes, it is. 18 00:00:41,875 --> 00:00:43,377 Oh, my goodness, you sound sexy. 19 00:00:43,460 --> 00:00:44,920 Oh, thank you. I've been working out. 20 00:00:45,003 --> 00:00:47,649 Whoa, whoa, whoa! Pam! Pam! You are not talking to Dwight right now! 21 00:00:47,673 --> 00:00:49,716 You are talking to Jim. Dwight? 22 00:00:49,800 --> 00:00:52,386 No! Pam, I'm over here! 23 00:00:52,469 --> 00:00:53,637 I'm confused. 24 00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:55,430 Disconnect that right now. 25 00:00:55,514 --> 00:00:56,598 You give me your earpiece. 26 00:00:56,682 --> 00:00:58,809 Can't do that. Unsanitary. 27 00:00:59,810 --> 00:01:00,811 (Dwight groans) 28 00:01:00,936 --> 00:01:02,187 Okay, you know what? Fine. 29 00:01:02,271 --> 00:01:05,816 I will reprogram my phone to go to my office phone. 30 00:01:08,860 --> 00:01:09,987 Done. 31 00:01:10,779 --> 00:01:11,947 (Telephone ringing) 32 00:01:13,323 --> 00:01:14,324 This is Dwight. 33 00:01:14,700 --> 00:01:17,536 Oh, and I forwarded his desk phone to mine. 34 00:01:18,704 --> 00:01:21,290 Oh, hello, mother. Good news, I have married. 35 00:01:21,373 --> 00:01:22,708 Tell father. 36 00:01:23,834 --> 00:01:25,002 Such a nice woman. 37 00:01:29,298 --> 00:01:30,299 (Cell phone ringing) 38 00:01:30,382 --> 00:01:31,592 (Dwight exclaims angrily) 39 00:01:53,238 --> 00:01:57,534 Michael: Today is Toby Flenderson's last day. 40 00:01:58,076 --> 00:02:01,455 I couldn't sleep last night. I came in extra early. 41 00:02:01,538 --> 00:02:02,831 So much energy. 42 00:02:02,914 --> 00:02:06,168 There are certain days that you know you will remember for the rest of your life, 43 00:02:06,251 --> 00:02:10,130 and I just have a feeling that today is one of those days. 44 00:02:10,797 --> 00:02:12,507 Morning. Morning. 45 00:02:13,050 --> 00:02:15,302 So here we go. Just a matter of hours now 46 00:02:15,385 --> 00:02:17,804 until his horrible-ness has left the building. 47 00:02:18,180 --> 00:02:20,515 I'm going to set my watch alarm, 48 00:02:21,183 --> 00:02:22,392 and... 49 00:02:22,601 --> 00:02:23,602 (Beeps) 50 00:02:24,603 --> 00:02:26,688 Good morning, Kelly. 51 00:02:26,772 --> 00:02:29,566 I can't believe this is your last day. How do you feel? 52 00:02:29,650 --> 00:02:31,401 Fine. Good. 53 00:02:31,485 --> 00:02:32,569 I feel weird. 54 00:02:33,153 --> 00:02:36,365 First thing on the agenda, actually, the only thing on the agenda, 55 00:02:36,448 --> 00:02:38,450 is the status of Toby's going-away party. 56 00:02:38,533 --> 00:02:40,452 We have a butter-cream cake 57 00:02:40,535 --> 00:02:42,162 and a slide show of Toby. Okay. 58 00:02:42,245 --> 00:02:44,915 But so far we only have two pictures of him. 59 00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:47,000 Michael: Okay. Well, this will not do. 60 00:02:47,084 --> 00:02:50,587 Toby is going away forever, 61 00:02:50,671 --> 00:02:53,382 and we need to do something very, very special. 62 00:02:53,465 --> 00:02:55,133 In some cultures, when somebody leaves, 63 00:02:55,217 --> 00:02:57,719 like New Orleans' culture, they have a parade, 64 00:02:57,803 --> 00:03:00,555 and they have a band, and people party in the streets. 65 00:03:00,639 --> 00:03:02,808 Do you mean leaves as in dies? 66 00:03:02,891 --> 00:03:05,352 You want us to throw Toby a New Orleans funeral? 67 00:03:05,435 --> 00:03:10,315 If the devil were to explode, and evil were gone forever, 68 00:03:10,399 --> 00:03:12,734 what sort of party would you have? 69 00:03:12,818 --> 00:03:13,860 Michael... 70 00:03:13,944 --> 00:03:15,195 Like a beach blowout, 71 00:03:15,278 --> 00:03:16,863 or a toga, a toga. No, you know, no. 72 00:03:16,947 --> 00:03:18,907 Toga! You always do this. 73 00:03:18,990 --> 00:03:23,078 We have a nice, modest party planned, and then you come in and demand the world. 74 00:03:23,161 --> 00:03:26,998 Let me be clear, there is simply no money for anything other than a cake 75 00:03:27,082 --> 00:03:29,209 and to develop a few more slides, 76 00:03:29,292 --> 00:03:32,045 although Toby won't be in them. 77 00:03:32,129 --> 00:03:34,256 I thought that you might say that. 78 00:03:36,508 --> 00:03:38,593 (Humming) 79 00:03:39,803 --> 00:03:46,518 Every year, my sweet, sweet grandmother sends me a check on my birthday for $50. 80 00:03:46,601 --> 00:03:51,773 And lately, she has been sending me, like, nine or ten checks a year. 81 00:03:53,066 --> 00:03:55,902 As Nana starts to... 82 00:03:55,986 --> 00:03:58,739 But I knew I should be saving it for something. 83 00:03:58,822 --> 00:04:01,658 I just didn't know what I should be saving it for. 84 00:04:01,742 --> 00:04:03,577 And then I had an awakening. 85 00:04:03,660 --> 00:04:06,121 Michael, my motorcycle. 86 00:04:06,872 --> 00:04:10,000 So I put the money in my shoe, andthen I forgot about it until now. 87 00:04:11,209 --> 00:04:14,755 I want a party that makes me feel like I'm flying through the air, 88 00:04:14,838 --> 00:04:19,885 without this ugly weight holding me down, you know? 89 00:04:21,636 --> 00:04:25,015 I want an anti-gravity machine. I saw it in a movie. 90 00:04:25,098 --> 00:04:28,101 You drink a potion, and then you just start floating all around. 91 00:04:28,185 --> 00:04:29,829 So how much anti-gravity potion do you want? 92 00:04:29,853 --> 00:04:32,981 No. No, you know what? This is not a party planning committee anymore. 93 00:04:33,064 --> 00:04:37,027 And I don't want your foot money, and I feel uncomfortable participating. 94 00:04:38,195 --> 00:04:40,864 Phyllis, can you do this? 95 00:04:44,075 --> 00:04:45,285 Yes. 96 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:53,001 Hi. Can I help you? 97 00:04:53,084 --> 00:04:54,711 Hi. Yes. I'm Holly flax. 98 00:04:54,795 --> 00:04:56,463 I was told to ask for Mr. Flenderson. 99 00:04:56,838 --> 00:04:58,757 As part of my last day, I am training 100 00:04:58,965 --> 00:05:02,135 the new human resources rep in the ways of the company. 101 00:05:03,136 --> 00:05:07,015 Again, the company has allotted for this training one day. 102 00:05:07,933 --> 00:05:10,685 So this is hr. This is your desk. 103 00:05:10,769 --> 00:05:12,062 I love the view. 104 00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:14,105 Yeah. It's great. Isn't it? 105 00:05:23,865 --> 00:05:25,242 Hey. 106 00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:26,368 Hey. 107 00:05:32,707 --> 00:05:33,834 What? 108 00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:36,336 Guess who just got into the Pratt school of design. 109 00:05:36,419 --> 00:05:37,921 No way! 110 00:05:38,004 --> 00:05:40,382 What did I say? I said that they'd love those sketches! 111 00:05:40,465 --> 00:05:42,217 Congratulations! Oh, thank you. 112 00:05:42,300 --> 00:05:44,740 I don't know why I doubted it, because I'm so clearly awesome. 113 00:05:44,803 --> 00:05:46,972 Yes. So, when do you start? 114 00:05:47,055 --> 00:05:48,324 I don't know. I didn't read it carefully. 115 00:05:48,348 --> 00:05:51,101 I just saw "congratulations," and I skimmed the list, I saw my name, 116 00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:53,270 I came in here to tell you and get a snack. 117 00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:55,021 Wow. Busy morning. (Sighs) 118 00:05:56,565 --> 00:06:01,027 So, you know, it means I have to go to New York for three months. 119 00:06:01,611 --> 00:06:04,906 It's not a big deal. I'll come visit you, and you'll visit me. 120 00:06:04,990 --> 00:06:07,158 It's only two hours away. It'll be fine. 121 00:06:07,242 --> 00:06:08,886 That part's going to suck, but it'll be great. 122 00:06:08,910 --> 00:06:10,787 Yeah. It sucks, but it'll be great. 123 00:06:10,871 --> 00:06:12,497 See how easy that is? 124 00:06:13,582 --> 00:06:14,708 (Pam laughs) 125 00:06:15,041 --> 00:06:17,669 I wouldn't go if things weren't so solid with Jim. 126 00:06:17,752 --> 00:06:19,272 And down the road, if we have a family, 127 00:06:19,337 --> 00:06:23,466 I couldn't go then either, so the timing's perfect. 128 00:06:24,843 --> 00:06:28,638 And that is the first time I've ever used the word perfect in here. 129 00:06:29,639 --> 00:06:30,783 Hey, Stanley, I want to introduce you... 130 00:06:30,807 --> 00:06:32,100 Michael: Real good. 131 00:06:32,183 --> 00:06:33,977 Toby's replacement. (Dwight growls) 132 00:06:34,936 --> 00:06:36,021 Wow. 133 00:06:36,354 --> 00:06:37,856 Dwight: So what do we know about her? 134 00:06:37,939 --> 00:06:41,902 Well, we know that Toby thinks she'll be great. 135 00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:44,154 Now, strike one. I hate her already. 136 00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:45,488 I hate her, too. 137 00:06:45,947 --> 00:06:47,449 Why do you hate her? 138 00:06:48,199 --> 00:06:50,994 Because she stinks 139 00:06:51,077 --> 00:06:55,582 with her ways and her head. 140 00:06:58,168 --> 00:06:59,961 You know, Dwight, sometimes, 141 00:07:01,087 --> 00:07:04,215 I don't know, I think you say things just to agree with me. 142 00:07:04,299 --> 00:07:05,539 Would that be such a bad thing? 143 00:07:05,592 --> 00:07:07,218 Yeah, it would. Just have a thought. 144 00:07:07,302 --> 00:07:09,262 Have an original thought. 145 00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:13,266 Although, I will agree that her head is weird. 146 00:07:14,142 --> 00:07:15,352 You know what we need to do? 147 00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:16,436 (Whispers) What? 148 00:07:16,519 --> 00:07:18,229 We need to sell her an elevator pass. 149 00:07:18,313 --> 00:07:20,982 But our elevator doesn't require a... 150 00:07:21,066 --> 00:07:23,735 Exactly. Little old-fashioned hazing. 151 00:07:24,569 --> 00:07:29,491 Hi. Are there any local companies that rent anti-gravity machines? 152 00:07:29,574 --> 00:07:31,117 Woman: Anti-gra vity machines? 153 00:07:31,201 --> 00:07:32,243 That's right. Yeah. 154 00:07:32,327 --> 00:07:34,287 What do they do exactly? 155 00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:36,581 They make you feel lighter. 156 00:07:36,957 --> 00:07:38,375 Anti-gra vity... 157 00:07:39,834 --> 00:07:44,214 Anti-depressant? I could put you through to someone on that. 158 00:07:44,297 --> 00:07:45,340 Okay. 159 00:07:45,423 --> 00:07:46,800 (Knocking on door) Yeah? 160 00:07:46,883 --> 00:07:48,134 Hey, Michael? 161 00:07:48,218 --> 00:07:49,886 Oh, hey, do you still work here? 162 00:07:49,970 --> 00:07:52,222 I'd like to introduce you to my replacement. Nah. 163 00:07:52,305 --> 00:07:53,890 Come on. No, I think I will pass. 164 00:07:53,974 --> 00:07:55,558 Michael Scott, this is Holly. 165 00:07:55,642 --> 00:07:57,102 Hi. Yeah, right. Hi. 166 00:07:57,185 --> 00:08:00,230 Okay, well, they hired a female Toby. Good for the world. 167 00:08:00,313 --> 00:08:03,984 Thank you, god, for creating two of you. 168 00:08:04,067 --> 00:08:07,654 Here's how things work here. My job is to make the office fun. 169 00:08:07,737 --> 00:08:13,785 Your job is to make the office lame, and we have an eternal struggle, you and I, 170 00:08:13,868 --> 00:08:15,787 and only one of us can be the winner. 171 00:08:15,870 --> 00:08:18,164 Spoiler alert, I'm going to win. 172 00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:22,210 Man, someone doesn't like hr. 173 00:08:22,293 --> 00:08:23,336 Yeah. 174 00:08:23,920 --> 00:08:24,921 What did you do to him? 175 00:08:25,005 --> 00:08:26,172 Nothing. 176 00:08:26,256 --> 00:08:29,634 No, he tortured me with his awfulness. 177 00:08:30,552 --> 00:08:31,845 Yeah, I know what you mean. 178 00:08:31,928 --> 00:08:35,098 I nearly fell asleep when he gave me a tour of the files. 179 00:08:37,434 --> 00:08:39,394 Well, look, I'll let you get back to work, 180 00:08:39,477 --> 00:08:42,564 but I really look forward to working with you, Mr. Scott. 181 00:08:42,647 --> 00:08:44,899 You can... Michael. 182 00:08:47,986 --> 00:08:51,781 Michael: Thanks to Toby, I have a very strong prejudice against human resources. 183 00:08:51,865 --> 00:08:55,410 I believe that the department is a breeding ground for monsters. 184 00:08:55,744 --> 00:08:59,706 What I failed to consider, though, is that not all monsters are bad. 185 00:09:00,498 --> 00:09:02,333 Like e.T. 186 00:09:03,209 --> 00:09:07,422 Is Holly our extraterrestrial? Maybe. 187 00:09:08,673 --> 00:09:11,801 Or maybe she's just an awesome woman from this planet. 188 00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:15,305 The pleasure's all mine. 189 00:09:15,388 --> 00:09:16,473 Thanks. 190 00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:18,534 I'm really looking forward to sitting down with you 191 00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:20,393 and finding out more about what you do here. 192 00:09:20,477 --> 00:09:21,478 Any time. 193 00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:22,771 Yeah. What do you do here? 194 00:09:26,691 --> 00:09:27,942 Excuse me. 195 00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:30,487 What is wrong with this woman? 196 00:09:30,570 --> 00:09:33,281 She's asking about stuff that's nobody's business. 197 00:09:33,364 --> 00:09:34,532 What do I do? 198 00:09:36,284 --> 00:09:39,454 Really, what do I do here? I should have written it down. 199 00:09:39,746 --> 00:09:41,414 Qua-something. 200 00:09:42,332 --> 00:09:47,629 Qua... quar... Qua... qual... quar... 201 00:09:47,712 --> 00:09:50,048 Quabity. Quabity assuance. 202 00:09:50,715 --> 00:09:52,634 No, no, no, no, but I'm getting close. 203 00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:54,886 Have you been introduced to Kevin? 204 00:09:54,969 --> 00:09:56,471 No. Which one's Kevin? 205 00:09:59,349 --> 00:10:00,350 (Snickering) 206 00:10:02,185 --> 00:10:06,439 He's here on a special work program. He's slow, you know, in his brain. 207 00:10:06,523 --> 00:10:08,608 Yeah. Oh, good for you guys. 208 00:10:08,900 --> 00:10:13,279 Hazing is a fun way to show a new employee that she is not welcome or liked. 209 00:10:14,364 --> 00:10:17,325 Accounting department, listen up. Holly, human resources. 210 00:10:17,408 --> 00:10:19,119 Angela, Oscar and Kevin. 211 00:10:19,202 --> 00:10:20,703 Hello. Hello. 212 00:10:21,663 --> 00:10:23,373 Hi. 213 00:10:23,998 --> 00:10:25,333 What do you do? 214 00:10:25,416 --> 00:10:26,584 I do the numbers. 215 00:10:27,085 --> 00:10:29,003 Oh, good for you. 216 00:10:31,297 --> 00:10:33,299 Do you want an M&M? 217 00:10:33,550 --> 00:10:36,010 Oh, no. That is so sweet. Thank you, though. 218 00:10:36,094 --> 00:10:41,141 Yeah. I keep them here at my desk, so that everybody doesn't take them. 219 00:10:41,224 --> 00:10:43,852 Well, that is a very safe place for them. 220 00:10:45,270 --> 00:10:46,271 Yeah. 221 00:10:46,354 --> 00:10:48,148 Michael: Here she is, Holly. 222 00:10:49,274 --> 00:10:52,819 You know, if we hung Holly from the ceiling, 223 00:10:52,902 --> 00:10:54,988 we'd have to kiss underneath her. 224 00:10:55,488 --> 00:10:57,782 So, I know. Oh, sorry. 225 00:10:57,866 --> 00:11:02,036 Question, are you real, or are you a Holly-gram? 226 00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:05,123 (Laughing sarcastically) 227 00:11:05,206 --> 00:11:07,126 Nice. I've never heard that one before, actually. 228 00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:08,585 Ibet thatsgood. 229 00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:11,254 Are these guys boring your ears off? 230 00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:12,755 Oh, no, no, I... 231 00:11:13,673 --> 00:11:16,384 What is your commute like? How long does it take to get in? 232 00:11:16,467 --> 00:11:19,470 Oh, uh... you know, I should make you a mix. 233 00:11:21,431 --> 00:11:23,600 Do you have a cd player? 234 00:11:23,975 --> 00:11:25,935 Um... yeah. Okay. 235 00:11:26,019 --> 00:11:27,103 All right. Thanks. 236 00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:28,479 Great. 237 00:11:28,605 --> 00:11:30,064 Do you like it? 238 00:11:30,148 --> 00:11:33,651 It's a photo of everyone in the office, so you can take it to Costa Rica. 239 00:11:33,735 --> 00:11:34,777 You're not in it. 240 00:11:34,861 --> 00:11:36,571 Well, I was taking the picture. 241 00:11:37,822 --> 00:11:39,616 Iloveitlloveit 242 00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:46,831 I would love a picture of the two of us to also take to Costa Rica. 243 00:11:47,165 --> 00:11:49,167 Sure. Do you have a camera here? 244 00:11:51,586 --> 00:11:53,796 Does anyone have a camera here? 245 00:11:56,382 --> 00:11:58,134 No one has a camera here. 246 00:11:59,093 --> 00:12:00,511 Okay. 247 00:12:00,595 --> 00:12:02,235 I'm going... I'll go get one. I'll just... 248 00:12:07,518 --> 00:12:11,439 So I just got the fax. Closing the sale, and it's big. 249 00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:12,649 It is really big. 250 00:12:12,732 --> 00:12:13,775 Ryan: Congratulations. 251 00:12:13,858 --> 00:12:15,276 Thanks... don't interrupt. 252 00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:18,488 Congratulations on doing your job. Did you enter the sale on the web site? 253 00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:20,051 Nope, I didn't. I just logged it in... 254 00:12:20,114 --> 00:12:22,200 All right, try to be a team player here, Jim. 255 00:12:22,283 --> 00:12:23,618 Log it in the web site. 256 00:12:23,701 --> 00:12:25,054 All right, well, it already went through, so... 257 00:12:25,078 --> 00:12:27,121 Don't worry about that. Just re-log it. 258 00:12:27,205 --> 00:12:28,831 (Dial tone drones) Hello? 259 00:12:35,004 --> 00:12:36,297 Hmm... 260 00:12:36,381 --> 00:12:37,465 Jim? 261 00:12:42,428 --> 00:12:45,473 I am downloading some n3p... 262 00:12:45,890 --> 00:12:47,016 That's not it... music... 263 00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:49,519 For a cd mix tape... yep. 264 00:12:49,602 --> 00:12:50,895 Close... for Holly. 265 00:12:50,979 --> 00:12:54,816 And I'm looking for perfect songs that work on two levels. 266 00:12:54,899 --> 00:12:56,025 What are the two levels? 267 00:12:56,109 --> 00:12:58,736 The two levels being, welcome to Scranton, 268 00:12:58,820 --> 00:13:01,030 and I love you. 269 00:13:01,990 --> 00:13:04,951 Okay, let's start with the "I love you" level. 270 00:13:05,034 --> 00:13:09,038 Hey, what's the group that was from Scranton and made it big? 271 00:13:09,122 --> 00:13:10,665 Was that U2? Yes. 272 00:13:10,748 --> 00:13:12,625 You don't love Holly. 273 00:13:12,709 --> 00:13:13,793 I think I do. 274 00:13:13,876 --> 00:13:14,877 But you just met her. 275 00:13:14,961 --> 00:13:17,255 Well, it's love at first sight. 276 00:13:18,006 --> 00:13:21,050 Actually, it was... no, it was when I heard her voice. 277 00:13:21,134 --> 00:13:23,219 It was love at first see with my ears. 278 00:13:23,303 --> 00:13:25,138 Okay. It doesn't work like that. 279 00:13:25,221 --> 00:13:27,890 Well, not a romantic. 280 00:13:27,974 --> 00:13:29,183 Actually, I think I am. 281 00:13:29,267 --> 00:13:32,687 And I have a little bit of experience in office romance. 282 00:13:32,770 --> 00:13:33,855 Oh, really? Yeah. 283 00:13:33,938 --> 00:13:35,440 Like with who? 284 00:13:35,857 --> 00:13:36,941 We've been through this. 285 00:13:37,025 --> 00:13:38,026 Pam? 286 00:13:38,109 --> 00:13:41,279 Yes. We are still dating, and guess what, I took it slow. 287 00:13:41,362 --> 00:13:42,739 Yeah, you took it too slow. 288 00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:43,948 Well, we're really happy. 289 00:13:44,032 --> 00:13:48,745 This thing with Holly feels a lot like love to me. 290 00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:51,205 And that's really sweet, and you can think that, 291 00:13:51,289 --> 00:13:54,667 but you don't say that out loud, and you definitely don't say it to her. 292 00:13:54,751 --> 00:13:56,419 I don't want her to get away. 293 00:13:56,502 --> 00:14:01,424 I know. Here, Michael, you can court her as you get to know her, you know? 294 00:14:01,507 --> 00:14:04,093 I mean, the office is a great place for that. 295 00:14:04,385 --> 00:14:06,596 Pam and I, we got to know each other right out there. 296 00:14:06,679 --> 00:14:10,516 I mean, the first time we joked around was at my desk. 297 00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:15,521 And the first meal we ever had was in the break room, actually. 298 00:14:15,605 --> 00:14:19,192 We were at two separate tables, and I remember that. 299 00:14:19,275 --> 00:14:23,321 The first time we kissed, even, was right outside and... 300 00:14:24,364 --> 00:14:28,910 Look, all I'm saying is that you can get to know someone really, really well, 301 00:14:29,952 --> 00:14:32,205 like I did, right here at work. 302 00:14:35,458 --> 00:14:39,754 I was thinking fireworks for the party. What do you think? 303 00:14:39,837 --> 00:14:42,131 Oh, boy. I appreciate your help, but I can't... 304 00:14:42,215 --> 00:14:46,511 No, no, no. I just meant I wanted to pay to have fireworks at the party. 305 00:14:46,594 --> 00:14:48,262 Why would you do that? 306 00:14:49,055 --> 00:14:51,349 Because I'm going to miss Toby. 307 00:14:52,266 --> 00:14:55,812 Yep. He's a heck of a guy, and I think we should send him off right. 308 00:14:55,895 --> 00:14:58,022 Doesn't matter. Here you go. 309 00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:02,944 Really? 310 00:15:03,027 --> 00:15:04,507 Well, we all want a good party, right? 311 00:15:06,864 --> 00:15:08,741 I'm going to propose tonight. 312 00:15:10,118 --> 00:15:11,744 Holy crap. 313 00:15:25,591 --> 00:15:27,343 Hey, Kevin. Hi. 314 00:15:28,052 --> 00:15:29,929 Do you need some help? 315 00:15:30,138 --> 00:15:31,806 I can't decide what to get. 316 00:15:32,765 --> 00:15:34,767 Well, what do you like to eat? 317 00:15:35,476 --> 00:15:37,603 Well, I like pretzels, 318 00:15:39,564 --> 00:15:41,232 but I really like chips. 319 00:15:41,732 --> 00:15:42,733 Hmm. 320 00:15:43,025 --> 00:15:45,403 Well, how much money do you have there? 321 00:15:47,071 --> 00:15:48,448 Okay, let's see. 322 00:15:49,282 --> 00:15:52,535 Fifty... this is a button. 323 00:15:55,580 --> 00:15:58,499 Fifty-five, sixty-five, okay, you have seventy-five cents 324 00:15:58,916 --> 00:16:04,005 so that means you could get anything up in the top row. 325 00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:07,967 Hmm. 326 00:16:11,762 --> 00:16:14,182 I'm totally going to bang Holly. 327 00:16:14,390 --> 00:16:18,352 She is cute and helpful, and she really seems into me. 328 00:16:19,228 --> 00:16:20,855 Hey, Ryan. It's Jim. 329 00:16:20,938 --> 00:16:22,666 Look, man, I don't know what's gotten into you lately, 330 00:16:22,690 --> 00:16:24,126 but you know what? I really don't care, 331 00:16:24,150 --> 00:16:25,735 because you're trying to get rid of me, 332 00:16:25,818 --> 00:16:29,197 and I bet you think I don't care enough about this job to actually fight back, 333 00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:31,574 but you're wrong, because I do, and I will. 334 00:16:31,657 --> 00:16:33,701 So you can keep trying to push me out of this place, 335 00:16:33,784 --> 00:16:36,370 but guess what, I'm not going anywhere. 336 00:16:39,999 --> 00:16:41,000 (Exhales) 337 00:16:49,675 --> 00:16:50,801 Holly: Damn it. 338 00:16:52,345 --> 00:16:54,388 Hello, Holly. 339 00:16:55,014 --> 00:16:58,601 Whoa, what are you doing? You don't... 340 00:16:58,684 --> 00:17:01,562 You don't have to do that. I mean, we have already-put-together chairs. 341 00:17:01,646 --> 00:17:03,731 That's how we buy them, actually. 342 00:17:04,649 --> 00:17:08,528 Trying to adjust the lumbar support on Toby's chair, 343 00:17:08,611 --> 00:17:10,947 and that made this up-down lever thing not work, 344 00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:13,282 and then I took the whole chair apart, 345 00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:17,203 and that is the story of me on the floor. 346 00:17:17,286 --> 00:17:19,886 It's pretty good, right? Yeah, I'm going to sell the movie rights. 347 00:17:19,914 --> 00:17:23,000 And the sequel, woman stands at desk and works. 348 00:17:26,712 --> 00:17:31,676 So, I have no idea how you sit like that. 349 00:17:32,176 --> 00:17:33,386 Yoga. 350 00:17:34,262 --> 00:17:37,557 (Imitating Yoda) Sit on floor and put together chair, we will. 351 00:17:42,687 --> 00:17:43,688 (Laughs) 352 00:17:44,146 --> 00:17:45,398 Yoda. 353 00:17:50,319 --> 00:17:53,281 (Imitating Yoda) Pass curvy metal piece, you will. 354 00:18:00,705 --> 00:18:05,042 So are you in town this weekend? Because I'm not. 355 00:18:06,002 --> 00:18:07,837 I'm not going to be in town. 356 00:18:09,130 --> 00:18:10,339 I'm going out of town. 357 00:18:10,423 --> 00:18:12,633 Oh, so you can't make my orgy? 358 00:18:14,218 --> 00:18:15,428 Kidding. 359 00:18:16,721 --> 00:18:19,682 Kidding. Acting. 360 00:18:19,765 --> 00:18:20,766 Acting. 361 00:18:20,850 --> 00:18:22,685 Acting. 362 00:18:23,728 --> 00:18:25,021 Lovhz. 363 00:18:26,022 --> 00:18:27,106 Yeah. 364 00:18:28,774 --> 00:18:30,318 I did it. 365 00:18:30,818 --> 00:18:31,861 What did you do? 366 00:18:31,986 --> 00:18:33,362 I talked to her. Holly. 367 00:18:33,779 --> 00:18:39,368 Just pleasantries, nothing, you know, not like, "do you want kids?" Or religion, 368 00:18:39,452 --> 00:18:41,495 or "what side of the bed do you want?" 369 00:18:41,579 --> 00:18:44,373 Hey, I can take either side of the bed at this point. 370 00:18:44,457 --> 00:18:46,292 Wow. Okay, so how did that feel? 371 00:18:46,375 --> 00:18:47,960 It was hard. I wanted to kiss her. 372 00:18:48,044 --> 00:18:49,795 I'm so glad you didn't. 373 00:18:50,588 --> 00:18:51,589 (Inhales) 374 00:18:52,256 --> 00:18:53,883 Laying a base. Laying a base. 375 00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:55,259 There you go. 376 00:18:55,343 --> 00:18:58,054 There's plenty of base-lying left, right? 377 00:18:59,096 --> 00:19:01,015 Yeah. Hey. 378 00:19:02,767 --> 00:19:04,268 Hello, Angela. 379 00:19:04,352 --> 00:19:07,521 Phyllis. You look like you're going to have a heart attack. 380 00:19:07,605 --> 00:19:09,690 Can I get a list of your vendors? 381 00:19:10,775 --> 00:19:11,859 I shredded it. 382 00:19:11,942 --> 00:19:13,110 Why would you do that? 383 00:19:13,194 --> 00:19:15,655 Gosh, I just don't know. Why do you think? 384 00:19:21,619 --> 00:19:22,787 Sorry. 385 00:19:26,874 --> 00:19:28,376 What did you guys do? 386 00:19:28,459 --> 00:19:31,879 Oh... there he is. I thought you had gone home already. 387 00:19:31,962 --> 00:19:34,799 Why don't you go home and come back for the party? 388 00:19:36,550 --> 00:19:39,887 Well, we still have to do the exit interview. 389 00:19:43,391 --> 00:19:44,767 Yes, we do. 390 00:19:45,434 --> 00:19:46,536 I'll let you in on a little secret. 391 00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:49,063 I've been very much looking forward to this moment. 392 00:19:49,146 --> 00:19:53,609 Very, very much. I have been steeped in anticipation. 393 00:19:54,360 --> 00:19:59,448 Toby has been cruising for a bruising for 12 years, 394 00:19:59,532 --> 00:20:02,118 and I am now his cruise director, 395 00:20:02,743 --> 00:20:04,995 and my name is captain bruising. 396 00:20:05,621 --> 00:20:07,373 Wow, thanks, Michael, I didn't expect you... 397 00:20:07,456 --> 00:20:10,960 Can I just say that of all the idiots 398 00:20:11,043 --> 00:20:14,422 in all the idiot villages in all the idiot worlds, 399 00:20:14,505 --> 00:20:17,508 you stand alone, my friend. 400 00:20:17,591 --> 00:20:18,634 Hello. 401 00:20:18,718 --> 00:20:21,095 Hey. Hi. Good to see you. 402 00:20:21,178 --> 00:20:22,221 Here? 403 00:20:22,304 --> 00:20:24,181 I'm just having a little exit interview. 404 00:20:24,265 --> 00:20:26,100 Yeah, I know. That's why I'm here. 405 00:20:26,183 --> 00:20:28,018 No, no, no. This is very boring stuff. 406 00:20:28,102 --> 00:20:30,229 Why don't you take a tour? Have you seen the bailer? 407 00:20:30,312 --> 00:20:32,732 No, no. I'll look at it later. 408 00:20:33,983 --> 00:20:35,818 It's part of my job. 409 00:20:38,404 --> 00:20:39,572 Okay. 410 00:20:39,655 --> 00:20:40,656 (Clears throat) 411 00:20:40,781 --> 00:20:41,967 Did you need me to take notes? 412 00:20:41,991 --> 00:20:43,242 Hey, Pam, stay. 413 00:20:43,325 --> 00:20:44,452 Okay. 414 00:20:48,748 --> 00:20:52,418 All right, well, then I will proceed. 415 00:20:52,793 --> 00:20:56,756 I just have some questions that I was going to ask. 416 00:21:00,426 --> 00:21:01,427 Michael: Um... 417 00:21:05,556 --> 00:21:07,558 Who do you think you are? 418 00:21:12,229 --> 00:21:13,522 I'm Toby. 419 00:21:14,023 --> 00:21:16,567 Yeah. Correct. 420 00:21:20,780 --> 00:21:22,323 What gives... what... 421 00:21:23,365 --> 00:21:25,117 What gives you the right? 422 00:21:28,162 --> 00:21:30,664 I brought the binder. Do you want to take a little look? 423 00:21:30,748 --> 00:21:34,084 Sure. You know what? That sounds good. I'll take a little look-see. 424 00:21:34,794 --> 00:21:36,712 Here we go. Thank you. 425 00:21:38,255 --> 00:21:44,678 "What would you improve about dunder Mifflin?" 426 00:21:44,762 --> 00:21:46,305 At this point... no, no, no, no. 427 00:21:46,388 --> 00:21:47,932 Pvegotsomeideas I guess. No, no, no. 428 00:21:48,015 --> 00:21:50,351 I'm not asking it. I'm just reading it out loud. 429 00:21:50,434 --> 00:21:52,478 I'd like to hear the answer. 430 00:21:53,479 --> 00:21:56,732 (Sighs) Well, let me see. I would... 431 00:22:08,035 --> 00:22:09,537 (Whispering) I'll kill you. 432 00:22:11,330 --> 00:22:13,040 I guess everything's okay. 433 00:22:13,707 --> 00:22:17,253 I made it this far, right? What's the point? 434 00:22:18,546 --> 00:22:19,856 Toby, why don't you open your present? 435 00:22:19,880 --> 00:22:22,132 No, no, no, no. 436 00:22:22,216 --> 00:22:25,928 Hey! Hey! Hey! This might not be what I think 437 00:22:26,011 --> 00:22:29,211 that I don't even know is in there because there are a lot of presents in my car, 438 00:22:29,265 --> 00:22:31,308 and I don't know which is which. 439 00:22:31,684 --> 00:22:33,143 "Suck on this." 440 00:22:36,689 --> 00:22:38,232 What the hell is that? Michael. 441 00:22:38,315 --> 00:22:40,818 That's... what do you mean "Michael"? 442 00:22:41,527 --> 00:22:46,991 That's not even my handwriting. Hey, what the hell is going on here? 443 00:22:48,158 --> 00:22:49,535 Who thought it would be hysterical 444 00:22:49,618 --> 00:22:52,580 to give Toby a rock for his going-away gift? 445 00:22:52,663 --> 00:22:53,706 You did. 446 00:22:53,789 --> 00:22:55,332 You made me wrap it. No! 447 00:22:55,416 --> 00:22:57,394 Now, I thought it was over the line. I just... (Michael humming) 448 00:22:57,418 --> 00:22:59,396 Okay. You know what that is? You know what that is? 449 00:22:59,420 --> 00:23:00,754 That is 450 00:23:03,549 --> 00:23:04,717 a psyche. 451 00:23:06,510 --> 00:23:09,889 Psyche. So that is not my real gift to Toby. 452 00:23:09,972 --> 00:23:10,973 So what is your gift? 453 00:23:11,056 --> 00:23:13,267 My gift is forthcoming, Pam. 454 00:23:13,350 --> 00:23:14,727 What is it? 455 00:23:16,186 --> 00:23:19,648 I am going to give Toby... 456 00:23:19,732 --> 00:23:20,774 Your watch? 457 00:23:24,028 --> 00:23:25,654 Yes, I am. 458 00:23:26,655 --> 00:23:29,742 That was it. How did you know that? 459 00:23:29,825 --> 00:23:31,493 I just knew. How did you know? 460 00:23:31,577 --> 00:23:33,287 Oh, that is so sweet. 461 00:23:33,370 --> 00:23:36,081 Well, that's my watch. 462 00:23:36,165 --> 00:23:38,459 Thanks. I'm going to set it to Costa Rica time. 463 00:23:38,542 --> 00:23:39,668 Hey, that's good. 464 00:23:39,752 --> 00:23:42,171 Creed: It's the kid. Look! Look! Look! 465 00:23:42,963 --> 00:23:45,466 Hey, it's the temp! 466 00:23:45,549 --> 00:23:46,800 Look! Dwight: Oh, my gosh. 467 00:23:46,884 --> 00:23:48,135 Creed: It's the temp. Pam: Wow. 468 00:23:48,218 --> 00:23:50,512 Pam: Is that the police? Dwight: Yes. 469 00:23:50,679 --> 00:23:52,097 Well, this is what happened. 470 00:23:52,181 --> 00:23:54,642 Ryan's big project was the web site, 471 00:23:55,768 --> 00:23:58,479 which wasn't doing so well, so Ryan, 472 00:23:58,562 --> 00:24:01,941 to give the impression of sales, recorded them twice, 473 00:24:02,024 --> 00:24:04,610 once as office sales and once as web site sales, 474 00:24:04,693 --> 00:24:08,197 which is what we refer to in the business as misleading the shareholders, 475 00:24:08,280 --> 00:24:10,824 another good term is fraud. 476 00:24:12,576 --> 00:24:15,663 The real crime, I think, was the beard. 477 00:24:16,997 --> 00:24:20,834 Oh, my god. Ryan. Oh, my god. 478 00:24:21,085 --> 00:24:24,254 I cannot wait to visit Ryan in prison. 479 00:24:24,338 --> 00:24:26,698 I'm going to wear my hottest track suit and get my hair done 480 00:24:26,757 --> 00:24:29,551 and then be like, "hi, Ryan." And then all the other prisoners 481 00:24:29,635 --> 00:24:33,639 are going to be like, "damn, Ryan, you got a hot ex-girlfriend. 482 00:24:33,764 --> 00:24:37,309 "I would never have treated her so bad when I was outside of prison." 483 00:24:38,352 --> 00:24:40,270 Would you do me a favor and connect me to Ryan? 484 00:24:40,354 --> 00:24:41,730 Absolutely. 485 00:24:46,068 --> 00:24:47,069 (Clears throat) 486 00:24:47,903 --> 00:24:49,363 Right to voicemail. 487 00:24:50,155 --> 00:24:53,117 Hey, Ryan, it's Jim. You know what? 488 00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:54,910 Totally disregard that last voicemail, 489 00:24:54,994 --> 00:24:57,496 because you obviously have your hands tied. 490 00:24:57,913 --> 00:24:59,081 Good luck. 491 00:25:00,290 --> 00:25:02,334 What's protocol on this? 492 00:25:02,418 --> 00:25:04,795 I normally do nothing, I guess. 493 00:25:07,673 --> 00:25:09,216 You shouldn't... 494 00:25:09,299 --> 00:25:10,551 (Knocking on door) 495 00:25:11,135 --> 00:25:12,761 Michael, are you okay? 496 00:25:13,512 --> 00:25:15,014 I'm just worried about my friend. 497 00:25:15,097 --> 00:25:17,057 Oh, god, of course you are. 498 00:25:17,224 --> 00:25:19,476 Just... I'm fine. 499 00:25:19,560 --> 00:25:21,413 I'm holding it together. I have a business to run. 500 00:25:21,437 --> 00:25:23,313 No, hey, stop. I'm cool. 501 00:25:23,397 --> 00:25:26,233 You can let yourself be upset. He's your friend. 502 00:25:28,694 --> 00:25:29,695 Look, 503 00:25:31,196 --> 00:25:33,198 you know what I usually find? 504 00:25:33,282 --> 00:25:37,536 Michael: Holly is sweet and simple, like a lady baker. 505 00:25:38,370 --> 00:25:42,124 I would not be surprised to find out 506 00:25:42,207 --> 00:25:45,085 that she had worked in a bakery before coming here. 507 00:25:45,335 --> 00:25:47,171 She has that kind of warmth. 508 00:25:49,965 --> 00:25:52,342 I'm pretty sure she's baked on a professional level. 509 00:25:55,387 --> 00:25:56,388 Jim: Whoa. 510 00:25:56,930 --> 00:26:00,225 Cool. A bouncy house. 511 00:26:00,309 --> 00:26:02,478 Kevin, take your shoes off first. 512 00:26:03,937 --> 00:26:06,106 (Dance music playing) 513 00:26:06,565 --> 00:26:08,317 No anti-gravity machine, huh? 514 00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:10,736 Sorry, Michael. I don't think they're real. 515 00:26:10,819 --> 00:26:12,738 Ferris wheel's pretty cool, though. 516 00:26:12,821 --> 00:26:15,449 Wow. Look at our parking lot. 517 00:26:15,532 --> 00:26:16,950 Yeah. Who would have thought? 518 00:26:26,043 --> 00:26:28,087 Pam: Is Jim going to propose tonight? 519 00:26:28,587 --> 00:26:31,590 He is, isn't he? No, he's not. 520 00:26:32,883 --> 00:26:33,926 Is he? 521 00:26:34,009 --> 00:26:37,054 It was a pretty good company, but I just couldn't see a future there. 522 00:26:37,137 --> 00:26:39,598 They kept hiring from the outside. 523 00:26:39,681 --> 00:26:42,684 It was easy to get in, but impossible to rise up. 524 00:26:42,768 --> 00:26:45,813 That's what she... a lot of places are like that. 525 00:26:47,106 --> 00:26:49,483 I think it's really cool you hired Kevin. 526 00:26:49,566 --> 00:26:50,609 Thanks. 527 00:26:52,736 --> 00:26:54,446 (Whispers) Do you have it? Almost. 528 00:26:58,283 --> 00:27:00,410 Here we go, here we go. Put it in! 529 00:27:02,496 --> 00:27:04,498 I like... that's my car. 530 00:27:06,125 --> 00:27:08,210 Hey, what are you doing? 531 00:27:10,170 --> 00:27:12,047 Mose! What the hell is going on here? 532 00:27:12,131 --> 00:27:13,358 Nothing you need to know the details of! 533 00:27:13,382 --> 00:27:15,068 There is a raccoon in the car! No, there's not. 534 00:27:15,092 --> 00:27:17,094 Michael: Dwight, why did you do that? 535 00:27:17,177 --> 00:27:18,303 It was playful hazing. 536 00:27:18,387 --> 00:27:21,140 No! There's no such thing as playful hazing. 537 00:27:22,266 --> 00:27:24,035 Dwight, I want you to look at Holly right now. 538 00:27:24,059 --> 00:27:26,895 Everybody, I want you to look at Holly right now, 539 00:27:26,979 --> 00:27:31,483 and maybe if you look at her deeply enough, you'll see what I see in her, 540 00:27:31,567 --> 00:27:36,113 and that is that we are all very lucky to have her here. 541 00:27:36,613 --> 00:27:41,869 Holly is the best thing that has happened to this company 542 00:27:42,870 --> 00:27:44,538 since world war ii. 543 00:27:44,621 --> 00:27:46,498 Fifty years. She is the best. 544 00:27:48,625 --> 00:27:50,085 Take care of that, all right? 545 00:27:50,169 --> 00:27:51,329 It's not rabid. Michael: Shh! 546 00:27:52,713 --> 00:27:53,964 Thanks for bringing that up. 547 00:27:54,047 --> 00:27:55,441 Get it out. Come on. Get it out. Get out. 548 00:27:55,465 --> 00:27:56,758 I'm really sorry. 549 00:27:56,842 --> 00:28:00,387 Michael, thank you so much for saying that. 550 00:28:00,470 --> 00:28:02,931 I feel so welcome here. I just... 551 00:28:08,395 --> 00:28:09,688 Excuse me. 552 00:28:13,108 --> 00:28:15,986 Did you see that? Did you see it? Did you see what... 553 00:28:16,069 --> 00:28:17,863 Wowee. 554 00:28:18,989 --> 00:28:21,325 Well, jan didn't believe in showing affection, 555 00:28:21,408 --> 00:28:25,621 so sometimes I don't know how to react when a girl touches me. 556 00:28:27,497 --> 00:28:28,749 I like it. 557 00:28:28,832 --> 00:28:30,417 (Laughs) 558 00:28:33,003 --> 00:28:34,880 Hey, Mrs. Vance, we're all out. 559 00:28:34,963 --> 00:28:36,381 Hey, Kevin. 560 00:28:36,465 --> 00:28:40,135 I need you to do me a solid and go buy some more barbecue sauce. 561 00:28:41,386 --> 00:28:42,471 Okay. 562 00:28:45,933 --> 00:28:47,517 Cool. 563 00:28:47,601 --> 00:28:49,561 You drive your own car? 564 00:28:49,645 --> 00:28:51,855 Yep. This is my car. 565 00:28:52,522 --> 00:28:54,149 Do you drive your own car? 566 00:28:54,233 --> 00:28:56,443 Yep. Just like you. 567 00:28:57,694 --> 00:28:59,196 Okay, bye. 568 00:29:01,156 --> 00:29:02,199 (Car engine starting) 569 00:29:02,616 --> 00:29:05,702 Kevin, I'm really proud of you. 570 00:29:11,750 --> 00:29:14,962 All right, let's hearit for Darryl and his band. 571 00:29:15,379 --> 00:29:20,133 You know what, let's also give a shout out to Phyllis for this awesome party. 572 00:29:20,634 --> 00:29:23,387 (People cheer/ng) Probably the best one that we have ever had. 573 00:29:24,388 --> 00:29:28,225 But the real reason that we are here is to say goodbye 574 00:29:28,308 --> 00:29:32,187 to a guy who we will probably never ever see again. 575 00:29:32,271 --> 00:29:35,607 Now, a lot of you know that I am an accomplished song writer. 576 00:29:35,691 --> 00:29:36,692 Song parody writer. 577 00:29:36,775 --> 00:29:39,403 I've done things like beers in heaven. 578 00:29:39,486 --> 00:29:40,487 Jim: Classic. 579 00:29:40,570 --> 00:29:42,281 Or total eclipse of the fart. 580 00:29:42,364 --> 00:29:43,800 Not my favorite. I like that one. I like that one. 581 00:29:43,824 --> 00:29:47,911 I love to sing them, but I am not going to be doing that today. 582 00:29:47,995 --> 00:29:51,790 I am going to be doing something I wrote specifically for Toby. 583 00:29:51,873 --> 00:29:56,044 Do you know goodbye stranger, supertramp? 584 00:29:56,128 --> 00:29:57,296 Yeah. 585 00:29:58,630 --> 00:30:00,590 (Singing) It was early morning yesterday 586 00:30:02,175 --> 00:30:03,927 I was up before the dawn 587 00:30:06,972 --> 00:30:09,308 and I really have enjoyed my stay 588 00:30:10,559 --> 00:30:12,311 Toby must be moving on 589 00:30:14,938 --> 00:30:20,152 I'm going to miss Toby. He has a nice calming presence in the office. 590 00:30:20,402 --> 00:30:22,237 Goodbye, Toby 591 00:30:22,321 --> 00:30:27,451 it's been nice hope you find your paradise 592 00:30:27,701 --> 00:30:30,662 don't tell him I said this, but I always thought he was kind of cute. 593 00:30:30,829 --> 00:30:35,167 Come tomorrow, feel no pain 594 00:30:36,001 --> 00:30:38,837 feel no pain 595 00:30:43,133 --> 00:30:47,888 Toby, Toby, Toby's going away 596 00:30:48,388 --> 00:30:52,267 see ya! He's out of here see ya! He's out of here 597 00:30:54,436 --> 00:30:57,689 goodbye, Toby! Goodbye, Toby! 598 00:30:57,773 --> 00:31:01,902 Goodbye, Toby! Goodbye, Toby! 599 00:31:02,319 --> 00:31:03,445 Notbad. 600 00:31:03,528 --> 00:31:05,572 Oh, hey, thanks. 601 00:31:05,655 --> 00:31:07,699 Someday I would love to hear beers in heaven. 602 00:31:07,783 --> 00:31:09,117 Oh, okay. Yeah. 603 00:31:09,201 --> 00:31:14,331 Well, actually, too soon. It's very sexual. 604 00:31:14,414 --> 00:31:16,083 (Cell phone ringing) 605 00:31:16,166 --> 00:31:17,334 Sorry. 606 00:31:18,502 --> 00:31:19,878 Kevin. 607 00:31:20,587 --> 00:31:23,382 Kevin, where are you? You missed my song, buddy. 608 00:31:23,465 --> 00:31:26,635 Yeah, Michael, I'm at gerrity's. You have to come down here. 609 00:31:26,718 --> 00:31:28,946 Just pay for it, and we'll reimburse you when you get back. 610 00:31:28,970 --> 00:31:30,680 No, I brought my money. 611 00:31:30,764 --> 00:31:32,724 Michael, there's something that you need to see. 612 00:31:32,808 --> 00:31:34,643 What is it? Just hurry. 613 00:31:36,269 --> 00:31:37,270 Is he okay? 614 00:31:37,354 --> 00:31:38,456 Yeah, he's at the supermarket. 615 00:31:38,480 --> 00:31:40,273 He needs me. You know, the party, 616 00:31:40,357 --> 00:31:43,151 driving to the supermarket. It's a big day for him. 617 00:31:43,235 --> 00:31:45,362 Yeah. That's true. 618 00:31:45,445 --> 00:31:49,199 Don't move a muscle. I will be back momentarily. All right? 619 00:31:50,075 --> 00:31:53,120 You can drink, finish your dnnk, andthenlfl_. Okay, I'll be back. 620 00:32:01,294 --> 00:32:02,712 Jan: Well, it was good to see you. 621 00:32:02,796 --> 00:32:03,956 It was great to see you, jan. 622 00:32:04,005 --> 00:32:05,048 Yeah. So... 623 00:32:05,132 --> 00:32:08,176 Okay. Hello, jan. 624 00:32:08,260 --> 00:32:09,928 Oh, hello, Michael. 625 00:32:10,011 --> 00:32:11,847 Wow, Kevin, really? 626 00:32:11,930 --> 00:32:14,850 We're... sorry, we're in the middle of a party. 627 00:32:14,933 --> 00:32:16,119 Is this why you called me down here? 628 00:32:16,143 --> 00:32:18,395 Yeah. Michael, I just... 629 00:32:19,229 --> 00:32:21,731 I think you kids have a lot to catch up on. 630 00:32:21,815 --> 00:32:22,983 Yeah. Okay. 631 00:32:23,066 --> 00:32:24,609 Thanks, Kevin. 632 00:32:30,115 --> 00:32:34,411 Wow. I can't believe it. (Jan laughs) 633 00:32:34,494 --> 00:32:35,912 Look at you. 634 00:32:36,329 --> 00:32:37,664 Are you nauseous? 635 00:32:37,747 --> 00:32:39,416 Do you have cravings? 636 00:32:39,499 --> 00:32:41,626 You never touched my Propecia or my Accutane, did you? 637 00:32:41,710 --> 00:32:42,752 No, I... good. 638 00:32:42,836 --> 00:32:45,297 Good. Thank god, becausethats_. Didn't touch that. 639 00:32:45,547 --> 00:32:48,717 Wow. I am so happy. I am so deliriously happy. 640 00:32:48,800 --> 00:32:50,469 Why? Because you are pregnant. 641 00:32:50,552 --> 00:32:52,095 Yeah. And because it obviously happened 642 00:32:52,179 --> 00:32:55,015 when we were together, and I am very... 643 00:32:55,098 --> 00:32:56,766 Yeah, hdkjhappen_. ._proud. 644 00:32:56,850 --> 00:33:00,729 When we were together. That's true, and... but you 645 00:33:02,522 --> 00:33:03,732 are not... 646 00:33:04,983 --> 00:33:06,443 You're not the dad. 647 00:33:16,203 --> 00:33:17,787 You cheated on me 648 00:33:18,747 --> 00:33:21,625 when I specifically asked you not to? 649 00:33:21,708 --> 00:33:25,504 No, I did not... I did not cheat on you. 650 00:33:26,338 --> 00:33:27,672 I did not. 651 00:33:28,298 --> 00:33:33,887 Well, okay, so it's not mine, and it's not somebody else's, so... 652 00:33:35,222 --> 00:33:36,848 I know 653 00:33:37,807 --> 00:33:39,935 the whole toilet seat thing is a myth, so... 654 00:33:40,185 --> 00:33:42,521 I went to a sperm bank. 655 00:33:44,064 --> 00:33:45,941 Yeah. You did? 656 00:33:46,024 --> 00:33:47,567 When we were going out? 657 00:33:47,651 --> 00:33:48,818 Yeah. 658 00:33:49,361 --> 00:33:53,490 I don't understand. You always used to be very cautious, 659 00:33:54,282 --> 00:33:55,492 wearing two condoms. 660 00:33:55,575 --> 00:33:56,660 I know. 661 00:33:57,035 --> 00:33:59,222 You would rather have somebody else's sperm than my sperm? 662 00:33:59,246 --> 00:34:02,582 No. No, no. It's not just any sperm bank. 663 00:34:02,666 --> 00:34:06,586 I mean, it's really... this is a really, really great place. 664 00:34:06,670 --> 00:34:09,297 It's amazing, actually. I'm going to bring you the catalog. 665 00:34:09,381 --> 00:34:10,966 You should look through it. 666 00:34:11,049 --> 00:34:14,302 It's... in fact, it's right next to that little breakfast place 667 00:34:14,386 --> 00:34:17,055 that you like in the city, where you can draw on the tables. 668 00:34:17,138 --> 00:34:18,306 Ihop. 669 00:34:18,390 --> 00:34:19,474 Ihop. 670 00:34:19,975 --> 00:34:23,562 If I was 22, and I had lots of time to have lots of children, 671 00:34:23,645 --> 00:34:25,748 then, sure, let's let Michael have a shot at one of them, 672 00:34:25,772 --> 00:34:28,024 but honestly, I need to make this one count. 673 00:34:28,525 --> 00:34:31,278 Oh, that's really good. I feel so much better. 674 00:34:31,361 --> 00:34:33,905 I just needed to get all of that out on the table. 675 00:34:34,114 --> 00:34:35,365 I'm glad you told me. 676 00:34:35,448 --> 00:34:37,593 Look, I don't know what you're going to be doing tomorrow, 677 00:34:37,617 --> 00:34:42,998 but I have my lamaze class in allentown, and you could come. 678 00:34:43,331 --> 00:34:47,586 I usually, you know, use a foam noodle instead of a partner. 679 00:34:51,381 --> 00:34:53,717 I'll... I have to think about it. 680 00:34:55,552 --> 00:34:56,678 Okay. 681 00:34:58,555 --> 00:35:03,059 My whole life I have known two things. 682 00:35:03,268 --> 00:35:07,022 I love sex, and I want to have kids. 683 00:35:07,188 --> 00:35:10,734 And I always thought that those two things would go hand in hand, 684 00:35:11,026 --> 00:35:13,612 but now I think it might be one or the other. 685 00:35:15,614 --> 00:35:17,240 Oh, look, they're starting. 686 00:35:23,747 --> 00:35:24,748 (Whoops) 687 00:35:34,716 --> 00:35:37,052 Well, I hope you had fun today, 688 00:35:37,135 --> 00:35:39,679 because you are never ever throwing a party again. 689 00:36:02,952 --> 00:36:04,579 Hey. 690 00:36:04,663 --> 00:36:06,831 Can I have your attention, please? 691 00:36:07,791 --> 00:36:10,543 I was waiting for the right time to do this, 692 00:36:10,627 --> 00:36:13,755 and I can't think of a better time than right now. 693 00:36:13,838 --> 00:36:17,008 With the music playing and all our friends around 694 00:36:17,092 --> 00:36:20,220 and fireworks going off. 695 00:36:20,303 --> 00:36:23,723 My parents are here, Andrew and Ellen Bernard. 696 00:36:23,807 --> 00:36:27,143 Thank you for sharing in this joyous moment. 697 00:36:27,227 --> 00:36:30,689 Ms. Angela Martin, will you please join me on stage? 698 00:36:32,524 --> 00:36:35,360 Okay. Then I will come to you, my flower. 699 00:36:37,278 --> 00:36:38,488 Darryl: Damn it! 700 00:36:41,700 --> 00:36:46,621 Angela, will you do me the honor 701 00:36:47,956 --> 00:36:52,836 of giving me your tiny hand in marriage? 702 00:37:01,928 --> 00:37:03,054 Okay. 703 00:37:03,972 --> 00:37:05,473 Into the Mike, sweetie. 704 00:37:05,557 --> 00:37:06,975 I said okay. 705 00:37:07,058 --> 00:37:08,893 She said yes. 706 00:37:08,977 --> 00:37:10,228 (All clapping) 707 00:37:10,311 --> 00:37:12,731 And the crowd goes wild! 708 00:37:13,690 --> 00:37:14,691 (Whoops) 709 00:37:15,358 --> 00:37:16,359 (Clears throat) 710 00:37:20,822 --> 00:37:21,823 (Sighs) 711 00:37:23,324 --> 00:37:27,328 I've been carrying that ring around in my wallet for six years, 712 00:37:27,412 --> 00:37:29,914 because you don't know when you're going to meet the right girl 713 00:37:29,998 --> 00:37:32,041 and the moment's going to be right. 714 00:37:32,125 --> 00:37:35,128 And tonight, with the fireworks 715 00:37:35,211 --> 00:37:39,841 and the music and everything, it was right. 716 00:37:40,425 --> 00:37:42,010 Can I be your bridesmaid? 717 00:37:49,893 --> 00:37:51,269 D wi g h t.' Well, 718 00:37:53,021 --> 00:37:54,689 it was my own fault. 719 00:37:57,192 --> 00:37:58,693 Andy: Tuna! 720 00:38:00,320 --> 00:38:02,405 I'm engaged. I know. 721 00:38:02,781 --> 00:38:04,091 That's awesome, man. That's great. 722 00:38:04,115 --> 00:38:06,826 Mr. Andrew Bernard. 723 00:38:07,994 --> 00:38:09,788 It's got a nice ring to it. 724 00:38:11,372 --> 00:38:15,043 Hey... hey, you know, I just realized, 725 00:38:15,627 --> 00:38:17,504 I don't have a picture of the two of us. 726 00:38:17,587 --> 00:38:18,630 Oh, yeah. 727 00:38:18,713 --> 00:38:20,715 Yeah, could we? Sure. 728 00:38:20,799 --> 00:38:22,425 Meredith, do you mind? 729 00:38:23,259 --> 00:38:24,594 This one. Okay. 730 00:38:26,679 --> 00:38:28,807 One, two, three. 731 00:38:30,558 --> 00:38:33,061 Oh, let's do it again. Pam, your smile is weird. 732 00:38:33,144 --> 00:38:35,855 It's digital, so just take as many as you want. 733 00:38:37,816 --> 00:38:39,192 One, two, three. 734 00:38:40,902 --> 00:38:42,487 One, two, three. 735 00:38:42,654 --> 00:38:47,200 I don't know. I just... I really thought Jim was going to propose tonight. 736 00:38:50,787 --> 00:38:52,539 Hey there. Hey. 737 00:38:52,622 --> 00:38:53,891 So, you missed something really big. 738 00:38:53,915 --> 00:38:54,958 Yeah? 739 00:38:55,041 --> 00:38:57,168 Yeah, Andy proposed to one of your accountants. 740 00:38:57,252 --> 00:38:58,294 Oh, wow. 741 00:38:58,378 --> 00:38:59,712 And that's as specific as I can be 742 00:38:59,796 --> 00:39:01,089 on my first day, but... 743 00:39:01,172 --> 00:39:03,174 Well, I can see Andy proposing to Angela. 744 00:39:03,258 --> 00:39:04,735 I can also see him proposing to Oscar. 745 00:39:04,759 --> 00:39:05,760 Okay. 746 00:39:07,262 --> 00:39:12,684 So, you know, somehow after all those ribs, I'm still really hungry. 747 00:39:13,601 --> 00:39:16,354 I don't know, I was thinking of maybe going off-campus somewhere 748 00:39:16,437 --> 00:39:18,147 and getting some dessert. 749 00:39:18,231 --> 00:39:19,232 Oh, um... 750 00:39:19,566 --> 00:39:22,861 Well, you know what, you should go to the glider diner. 751 00:39:23,444 --> 00:39:26,322 Ask Stanley about that. He practically lives there. 752 00:39:26,906 --> 00:39:27,991 Okay. 753 00:39:28,074 --> 00:39:29,284 I'll go to the diner with you. 754 00:39:30,493 --> 00:39:32,287 Oh, that would be great. 755 00:39:32,787 --> 00:39:34,539 We can go eat pie. 756 00:39:34,622 --> 00:39:35,748 I love pie. 757 00:39:36,457 --> 00:39:37,917 Me, too. Okay. 758 00:39:39,002 --> 00:39:40,169 Have a good night. Okay. 759 00:39:40,253 --> 00:39:41,296 Night. 760 00:39:51,097 --> 00:39:52,765 Yeah, it was a good day. 761 00:39:52,849 --> 00:39:55,560 I mean, first days are always the hardest, right? 762 00:39:56,102 --> 00:39:58,980 Well, I should go. I got to buckle him in. 763 00:40:03,192 --> 00:40:05,987 Michael: Well, this is it. I am here to see you off. 764 00:40:06,738 --> 00:40:08,114 Thanks. 765 00:40:08,573 --> 00:40:09,657 Really, Michael? 766 00:40:09,741 --> 00:40:11,075 Sorry. Corporate policy. 767 00:40:11,576 --> 00:40:13,494 It's not. You might take something. 768 00:40:13,578 --> 00:40:15,180 I don't think he's going to take anything. 769 00:40:15,204 --> 00:40:17,165 Okay, security guard. 770 00:40:17,498 --> 00:40:18,958 (Beeping) 771 00:40:19,042 --> 00:40:21,169 Some kind of alarm. 772 00:40:21,336 --> 00:40:22,795 Okay. 773 00:40:23,755 --> 00:40:25,340 Hi, jan. It's Michael. 774 00:40:26,299 --> 00:40:29,469 I just... I just want to let you know 775 00:40:29,552 --> 00:40:33,681 that I am going to go to your lamaze class tomorrow, 776 00:40:35,391 --> 00:40:38,436 and if there's any details you need to fill me in on, 777 00:40:38,519 --> 00:40:42,857 like what exactly lamaze is, that would be great, 778 00:40:43,399 --> 00:40:46,486 and I will see you tomorrow morning. 779 00:40:51,532 --> 00:40:55,119 I am going to be kind of a daddy. 780 00:41:01,751 --> 00:41:04,587 Party planning's a real high, like a runner's high. 781 00:41:04,671 --> 00:41:05,672 (Elevator bell dings) 782 00:41:15,473 --> 00:41:18,309 (Heavy breathing) 783 00:41:19,268 --> 00:41:21,104 Oh, god! What? 784 00:41:21,187 --> 00:41:22,188 (Phyllis gasps) 54553

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