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1
00:00:05,214 --> 00:00:06,465
This is ridiculous.
2
00:00:06,548 --> 00:00:08,967
Do you have any idea what
time we'll get out of here?
3
00:00:09,051 --> 00:00:12,221
Nobody likes to work late,
least of all me.
4
00:00:14,264 --> 00:00:15,307
Do you have plans tonight?
5
00:00:15,390 --> 00:00:16,433
No, I don't.
6
00:00:16,517 --> 00:00:19,162
Remember when you told us not to
make plans, 'cause we were working?
7
00:00:19,186 --> 00:00:20,771
Yes, I remember.
8
00:00:21,563 --> 00:00:22,648
Hmm.
9
00:00:22,731 --> 00:00:25,692
This is bs. This is bs.
Why are we here?
10
00:00:25,776 --> 00:00:29,279
I am gonna call corporate.
Enough is enough. I'm...
11
00:00:29,363 --> 00:00:33,575
God, I'm so mad! This is
Michael Scott, Scranton.
12
00:00:33,700 --> 00:00:36,745
Well, we don't want
to work. No, we don't!
13
00:00:36,828 --> 00:00:39,373
It's not fair to these people!
14
00:00:39,456 --> 00:00:42,918
These people are my friends,
and I care about them!
15
00:00:43,001 --> 00:00:44,586
We're not gonna do it!
16
00:00:44,753 --> 00:00:45,796
(Hangs up)
17
00:00:46,505 --> 00:00:49,174
Everybody, I just got off
the horn with corporate,
18
00:00:49,258 --> 00:00:54,179
and basically I told them where they could
stick their little overtime assignment.
19
00:00:54,263 --> 00:00:55,863
Go enjoy your Friday.
Thank you, Michael.
20
00:00:55,931 --> 00:00:57,057
All right.
21
00:00:57,140 --> 00:00:58,243
Dwight: All right. Happy Friday.
22
00:00:58,267 --> 00:01:00,411
Well, I think we dodged a
bullet, there. I think you did.
23
00:01:00,435 --> 00:01:01,895
I think we should celebrate.
24
00:01:02,104 --> 00:01:05,232
How about you, Pam, mi casa.
A little dinner, dancing, dnnks?
25
00:01:05,315 --> 00:01:08,110
Oh, I... you said
you didn't have plans.
26
00:01:09,945 --> 00:01:11,697
That's what you said.
27
00:01:11,780 --> 00:01:15,867
Michael has asked Pam and
me to dinner at least nine times.
28
00:01:15,951 --> 00:01:18,787
And every time, we've
been able to get out of it.
29
00:01:18,870 --> 00:01:22,541
But I've got to give
him credit. He got me.
30
00:01:22,624 --> 00:01:24,960
Because I'm starting to suspect
31
00:01:25,043 --> 00:01:27,504
that there was no
assignment from corporate.
32
00:01:27,588 --> 00:01:29,548
Michael, what time
should I be arriving?
33
00:01:30,549 --> 00:01:31,925
Dwight, it's couples only.
34
00:01:32,009 --> 00:01:37,222
And besides, I only have six wine glasses.
So it will be me and jan, and Pam and Jim.
35
00:01:37,306 --> 00:01:39,099
And Angela and Andy.
36
00:01:39,182 --> 00:01:40,601
Hey, oh!
37
00:01:41,852 --> 00:01:45,981
Does it bother me that I wasn't
invited to Michael's dinner party?
38
00:02:25,771 --> 00:02:27,439
Jan: Hi. Michael: Hello.
39
00:02:27,522 --> 00:02:29,566
How are you? Come on in.
40
00:02:29,650 --> 00:02:31,610
Good to see you. Chilly, huh?
41
00:02:31,693 --> 00:02:33,487
Jan: I'm so glad we finally...
42
00:02:33,612 --> 00:02:34,672
Finally got to do this
with you guys.
43
00:02:34,696 --> 00:02:36,615
This is great.
44
00:02:36,948 --> 00:02:39,201
You want to take
their coats, babe?
45
00:02:39,284 --> 00:02:40,452
Yes, I would. Okay.
46
00:02:40,535 --> 00:02:43,914
All right. So, what
have you been doing?
47
00:02:43,997 --> 00:02:45,957
Letssee, §nce I saw
you an hour ago? Yeah!
48
00:02:46,041 --> 00:02:48,710
I have been getting ready,
and then driving over here.
49
00:02:48,794 --> 00:02:50,837
Well, we've been doing
pretty much the same thing.
50
00:02:50,921 --> 00:02:52,839
Really? Except driving.
51
00:02:54,508 --> 00:02:55,842
We got you this.
52
00:02:55,967 --> 00:02:57,094
Pam!
53
00:02:57,177 --> 00:02:58,321
Thank you. Thatssorflce. Thanks
54
00:02:58,345 --> 00:03:00,055
this will be great
to cook with. Really.
55
00:03:00,138 --> 00:03:03,016
We”, have a seat,
or come on in, or...
56
00:03:03,100 --> 00:03:06,853
I don't know, make yourself
to home. This is our casa.
57
00:03:06,937 --> 00:03:08,122
Pam: It's really nice.
Jim: It's great.
58
00:03:08,146 --> 00:03:09,832
So, what do you guys think?
Should we do the tour first,
59
00:03:09,856 --> 00:03:11,400
should we have appetizers first?
60
00:03:11,483 --> 00:03:13,485
Tour. Let's do
the tour first. Okay.
61
00:03:13,568 --> 00:03:15,529
You have a preference,
babe? Upstairs first?
62
00:03:15,612 --> 00:03:17,989
Totally your call, babe.
All right, well, let's go, then.
63
00:03:18,073 --> 00:03:19,950
All right. I say upstairs.
64
00:03:21,243 --> 00:03:22,679
You guys doing
a little construction?
65
00:03:22,703 --> 00:03:24,955
Oh, just redoing
the sliding glass door.
66
00:03:25,038 --> 00:03:31,294
Jan: Yeah, so sorry about this god-awful
carpet. We are still a work in progress, here.
67
00:03:31,378 --> 00:03:33,296
This is my office.
68
00:03:33,380 --> 00:03:35,132
Yup. Never been used.
69
00:03:35,215 --> 00:03:36,883
Not super-exciting. No.
70
00:03:36,967 --> 00:03:39,219
And this is my work
space. Michael: This is it.
71
00:03:39,344 --> 00:03:40,488
Check that out. You smell that?
72
00:03:40,512 --> 00:03:41,555
Pam: Uh-huh.
73
00:03:41,638 --> 00:03:45,058
As you can smell, there's a lot
of different odors going on in here.
74
00:03:45,392 --> 00:03:47,060
So you have an office
and a work space.
75
00:03:47,144 --> 00:03:50,647
I do, you know. I just... I
cannot create in the same space
76
00:03:50,731 --> 00:03:53,984
that I conduct business. I'm sure
that you're the same with your doodles.
77
00:03:54,067 --> 00:03:55,110
Smell.
78
00:03:56,403 --> 00:03:58,321
It's fire. Bonfire.
79
00:03:58,405 --> 00:03:59,698
Bond! Menloveflflsone.
80
00:03:59,781 --> 00:04:04,369
(Imitating Sean Connery) James Bond-fire!
"I am bond-fire... James Bond-fire."
81
00:04:04,453 --> 00:04:05,912
Michael Scott!
82
00:04:06,788 --> 00:04:10,667
When I get frustrated,
or irritated or...
83
00:04:10,751 --> 00:04:13,670
Angry, I come up here and
I just smell all my candles!
84
00:04:13,754 --> 00:04:15,964
And it just... poof! Goes away.
85
00:04:16,047 --> 00:04:17,287
Just like that. Just like that.
86
00:04:17,424 --> 00:04:19,801
So this is the master bedroom.
87
00:04:19,968 --> 00:04:22,971
And these walls, they used to
be, like, white, like an asylum.
88
00:04:23,054 --> 00:04:25,891
So I wanted it to be softer, so I
had it painted an eggshell white.
89
00:04:25,974 --> 00:04:29,644
Guess what? White and eggshell
white are exactly the same color.
90
00:04:30,437 --> 00:04:31,772
Babe_. Exacfly.
91
00:04:31,855 --> 00:04:33,750
I thought you said that you
were gonna tidy things up.
92
00:04:33,774 --> 00:04:35,192
Well, I...
93
00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:36,401
Shame on you.
94
00:04:39,696 --> 00:04:40,697
What a cute bench.
95
00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:42,365
Michael: Thanks. That's my bed.
96
00:04:42,449 --> 00:04:46,203
Jan has some space issues,
so I curl up on that puppy.
97
00:04:46,328 --> 00:04:50,540
Really? 'Cause... it seems
pretty narrow and short.
98
00:04:50,624 --> 00:04:53,877
It's actually a lot bigger
than it seems. Look at this!
99
00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:55,921
See? He fits perfectly.
100
00:04:59,716 --> 00:05:01,218
I finally
101
00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:04,054
broke down and bought myself
102
00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:07,307
a plasma TV.
103
00:05:07,390 --> 00:05:10,727
Check it out. I actually
hung this on the wall myself.
104
00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:12,854
Jim: That's good. I want
to show you something.
105
00:05:12,938 --> 00:05:15,774
A lot of people in the room,
you need more space...
106
00:05:15,857 --> 00:05:17,818
Voila'. Right into the wall.
107
00:05:17,901 --> 00:05:18,902
Wow!
108
00:05:18,985 --> 00:05:20,654
Sometimes, I will just
109
00:05:20,737 --> 00:05:24,157
stand here and watch
television for hours. I love it.
110
00:05:25,242 --> 00:05:29,079
I love this TV. And I
also built this table.
111
00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:30,956
What is that, Chestnut?
112
00:05:31,039 --> 00:05:33,124
No, I think that is either
pine or nordic cherry.
113
00:05:33,208 --> 00:05:34,251
It's pine. Yeah.
114
00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:36,646
Michael, I'm just terrible at all
this stuff, so that's really cool.
115
00:05:36,670 --> 00:05:38,088
Really? Jim: Yeah.
116
00:05:38,171 --> 00:05:42,801
Yeah, he tried to set up my TiVo for me,
but then I didn't have audio for a week.
117
00:05:42,884 --> 00:05:46,096
If you ever need any help,
I'm just a phone call away.
118
00:05:46,179 --> 00:05:47,389
I bet you are.
119
00:05:48,932 --> 00:05:50,433
Well, I saw...
120
00:05:50,517 --> 00:05:51,643
Oh, your dundies.
121
00:05:51,726 --> 00:05:54,455
I'm surprised they're not out on
the coffee table for everybody to see.
122
00:05:54,479 --> 00:05:59,609
Well, it was between the
neon beer sign and the dundies.
123
00:05:59,693 --> 00:06:01,820
So I said, "honey,
keep the trophies."
124
00:06:01,903 --> 00:06:07,659
Oh, honey, I have the best trophy
right here. Aside from my dundies.
125
00:06:07,742 --> 00:06:08,952
(Doorbell rings)
126
00:06:09,202 --> 00:06:12,163
Oh, excuse us for
just a second. I'll get it.
127
00:06:12,247 --> 00:06:14,332
So glad we were
finally able to do this.
128
00:06:14,457 --> 00:06:16,126
So glad we... no. No.
129
00:06:16,209 --> 00:06:18,295
Okay. Tuna!
130
00:06:18,378 --> 00:06:21,298
What's up, tuna? We gonna
have some tuna for dinner?
131
00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:24,068
I bet you're sick of tuna, right?
You probably have tuna every night.
132
00:06:24,092 --> 00:06:26,303
Ahrqht tuna.
133
00:06:26,386 --> 00:06:28,763
These are for you.
Oh, how thoughtful.
134
00:06:28,847 --> 00:06:31,266
Michael: Very nice.
Except for one flower,
135
00:06:31,349 --> 00:06:33,810
which is for my flower.
136
00:06:33,894 --> 00:06:34,895
Jan: Aw.
137
00:06:35,145 --> 00:06:37,898
What am I supposed
to do with this?
138
00:06:37,981 --> 00:06:40,942
Well, how about we do the short
tour, and then I'll start dinner?
139
00:06:41,026 --> 00:06:43,695
Oh, I can help starting
dinner, if you need it.
140
00:06:43,778 --> 00:06:46,858
Oh no, no, no, it's just the osso buco,
needs to braise for about three hours.
141
00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:48,742
Everything else is done.
142
00:06:48,825 --> 00:06:52,454
Three hours from now, or three
hours from earlier, like 4:00?
143
00:06:52,537 --> 00:06:56,625
You know, Pam, in Spain, they often
don't even start eating until midnight.
144
00:06:56,708 --> 00:06:58,752
When in Rome.
145
00:06:58,835 --> 00:07:00,629
Jan: You have a preference?
Upstairs first?
146
00:07:00,712 --> 00:07:01,772
Michael: Whatever you say, babe.
147
00:07:01,796 --> 00:07:02,881
Jan: Follow me.
148
00:07:02,964 --> 00:07:04,049
Michael: All right.
149
00:07:05,634 --> 00:07:10,472
How about a toast? Shall I?
Here's to good friends.
150
00:07:10,555 --> 00:07:12,307
Jim: Cheers. Cheers.
151
00:07:14,351 --> 00:07:15,477
Mmm.
152
00:07:17,187 --> 00:07:19,189
A sort of an oaky afterbirth.
153
00:07:20,941 --> 00:07:21,942
What was that?
154
00:07:22,025 --> 00:07:24,444
Music? Should we turn
some music on?
155
00:07:24,527 --> 00:07:26,237
That sounds good.
156
00:07:26,321 --> 00:07:29,866
Do you guys remember
my old assistant, hunter?
157
00:07:29,950 --> 00:07:34,537
He is an excellent songwriter. Wait
until you hear this. Okay, here we go.
158
00:07:37,207 --> 00:07:40,335
(Country ballad
playing on stereo)
159
00:07:51,429 --> 00:07:52,806
(Singing along)
160
00:08:12,409 --> 00:08:14,387
Michael: You know what?
Hunter was a terrible assistant.
161
00:08:14,411 --> 00:08:15,495
That is why Ryan fired him.
162
00:08:15,578 --> 00:08:17,682
Well, I think he's probably
just about as reliable as Pam,
163
00:08:17,706 --> 00:08:20,250
being that it usually takes you
an afternoon to get back to me.
164
00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:23,086
Sometimes I think
she holds on to faxes.
165
00:08:25,839 --> 00:08:29,217
(Whispering) I don't care what
they say about me. I just want to eat.
166
00:08:29,300 --> 00:08:32,220
Which I realize
is a lot to ask for
167
00:08:32,303 --> 00:08:34,014
at a dinner party.
168
00:08:34,097 --> 00:08:37,767
Cow. No, it's a
hump, there's a hump.
169
00:08:37,934 --> 00:08:39,019
Joe camel! Joe camel! Yes!
170
00:08:39,102 --> 00:08:41,354
Okay, yes. First
name of that animal,
171
00:08:41,438 --> 00:08:45,233
and the second name is the
state where Helena is the capital.
172
00:08:45,316 --> 00:08:46,943
Montana. Joe Montana?
173
00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:48,737
Yes! Yes!
174
00:08:48,820 --> 00:08:50,780
Time's up! All
right, two pieces!
175
00:08:50,864 --> 00:08:52,504
Why didn't you just say
49ers quarterback?
176
00:08:52,615 --> 00:08:57,328
All right, my... my... my... my
turn! My... my... my... my turn!
177
00:08:57,412 --> 00:08:59,080
My... my... my... my turn!
178
00:08:59,164 --> 00:09:01,166
Babe, can you just, like,
really... Michael: What?
179
00:09:01,291 --> 00:09:03,084
You'rejust, like, really...
180
00:09:03,168 --> 00:09:04,544
What? What?
181
00:09:04,627 --> 00:09:06,212
Could you just simmer
down? Seriously.
182
00:09:06,296 --> 00:09:08,214
I'm just making
people laugh. Jan: No.
183
00:09:08,298 --> 00:09:10,884
Yes, I was watching Jim's
face. I was watching Jim.
184
00:09:10,967 --> 00:09:13,011
And he was laughing.
185
00:09:13,219 --> 00:09:14,387
No smile.
186
00:09:14,471 --> 00:09:16,723
Look at him. He's laughing.
187
00:09:16,806 --> 00:09:20,727
Michael and jan seem to be
playing their own separate game.
188
00:09:20,810 --> 00:09:24,606
And it's called, "let's see how
uncomfortable we can make our guests."
189
00:09:24,689 --> 00:09:28,526
And they're both winning. So
I am going to make a run for it.
190
00:09:29,819 --> 00:09:32,530
You'll never guess. I just got
a message from my landlord.
191
00:09:32,614 --> 00:09:34,240
Apparently,
my apartment flooded.
192
00:09:34,324 --> 00:09:35,992
Something with the
sprinkler. Jan: Oh, no!
193
00:09:36,076 --> 00:09:38,661
Pam, we should probably
get going and see the damage.
194
00:09:38,745 --> 00:09:39,746
Jan: Oh! Okay.
195
00:09:39,829 --> 00:09:42,165
Well, you don't need
two of you to do that.
196
00:09:44,501 --> 00:09:46,252
Jim: That's true...
197
00:09:48,129 --> 00:09:49,255
Dinner sounded delicious.
198
00:09:49,339 --> 00:09:51,099
Pam, I'll see you at home.
Thank you so much.
199
00:09:51,132 --> 00:09:54,469
Oh, Jim, I don't think you're going to
abandon this party here, all by itself.
200
00:09:54,677 --> 00:09:56,489
I don't know, because
everything I own is there.
201
00:09:56,513 --> 00:09:59,599
You can buy new stuff, but
you can't buy a new party.
202
00:09:59,682 --> 00:10:03,228
That's true. That is a great
point. Come on down here.
203
00:10:05,146 --> 00:10:09,359
Sit down on that couch
and be amongst friends,
204
00:10:09,442 --> 00:10:12,946
and we're not gonna think about all
your stuff being destroyed. All right?
205
00:10:13,029 --> 00:10:14,114
Andy: Michael, you're up.
206
00:10:14,197 --> 00:10:15,865
Here we go.
This is gonna be fun.
207
00:10:15,949 --> 00:10:17,033
Ready... Andy: Go!
208
00:10:17,117 --> 00:10:19,077
All right. First name is Tom.
209
00:10:19,160 --> 00:10:22,413
No, no, no. No names. No
names, no rhyming, no sound-alikes.
210
00:10:22,497 --> 00:10:24,833
All right, okay. Okay.
You're getting into my head!
211
00:10:24,916 --> 00:10:26,793
First name is blank,
and he goes on a cruise.
212
00:10:26,876 --> 00:10:28,878
He goes on a Caribbean cruise.
213
00:10:28,962 --> 00:10:30,171
I don't know. Katie Holmes.
214
00:10:30,255 --> 00:10:33,383
No, but he's married to
her! Oh, Dawson's creek.
215
00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:36,302
No, it has to be a real
person, Jim. Come on!
216
00:10:36,386 --> 00:10:39,055
No, no, I'm gonna pass.
I'm gonna pass.
217
00:10:40,056 --> 00:10:41,182
Okay!
218
00:10:41,266 --> 00:10:44,394
Rhymes with parnold
sportsanegger. No rhyming!
219
00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:45,895
Not really a rhyme.
220
00:10:45,979 --> 00:10:47,272
Another clue! Another clue!
221
00:10:47,355 --> 00:10:49,649
Okay, he's the governor
of California.
222
00:10:49,732 --> 00:10:51,151
He is the Terminator.
223
00:10:51,234 --> 00:10:52,735
Those aren't helpful.
Tom Cruise!
224
00:10:52,819 --> 00:10:53,862
Time! No!
225
00:10:53,945 --> 00:10:56,739
God! Does anybody
read the paper?
226
00:11:06,583 --> 00:11:07,709
Oh, thank you.
227
00:11:07,792 --> 00:11:08,877
You're welcome.
228
00:11:19,220 --> 00:11:22,891
I'm so, so sorry for
the temperature in here.
229
00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:27,687
The sliding glass
door shattered.
230
00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:29,230
It's okay. So...
231
00:11:31,524 --> 00:11:33,193
It's actually
a really cute story.
232
00:11:33,276 --> 00:11:35,236
Do you want to tell it,
babe, or should I tell it?
233
00:11:35,320 --> 00:11:36,360
Idonthke that story, babe.
234
00:11:36,404 --> 00:11:37,447
Come on!
235
00:11:37,530 --> 00:11:41,743
It's a cute story... Michael ran
through the sliding glass door
236
00:11:41,826 --> 00:11:44,829
because he thought he heard
the ice cream truck.
237
00:11:44,913 --> 00:11:46,247
Stop. Stop it!
238
00:11:46,372 --> 00:11:49,334
I mean, I like ice cream,
okay? Sue me.
239
00:11:49,417 --> 00:11:51,753
Oh, no, don't.
240
00:11:51,836 --> 00:11:54,547
I shouldn't say that jokingly,
because she will sue me.
241
00:11:54,631 --> 00:11:58,551
She loves to sue.
She loves lawsuits.
242
00:11:58,635 --> 00:12:03,681
You know, honey, that door was
extremely clean, and it looked invisible.
243
00:12:03,765 --> 00:12:05,642
You are so right.
You are so right!
244
00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:08,978
Because before I lived here, the
glass was always covered in smudges.
245
00:12:09,062 --> 00:12:12,273
And I moved in and I cleaned it,
so I guess that makes me the devil.
246
00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:17,862
You are! She is! She
is the devil! I'm in hell!
247
00:12:18,863 --> 00:12:20,198
I'm burning. Help me!
248
00:12:20,281 --> 00:12:21,574
You shouldn't joke about that.
249
00:12:21,658 --> 00:12:22,968
Is there more wine
in the kitchen?
250
00:12:22,992 --> 00:12:24,369
No, I will get it.
I will get it.
251
00:12:24,452 --> 00:12:26,305
What kind of hostess would
I be if I didn't get my wine?
252
00:12:26,329 --> 00:12:28,641
It's okay, I don't mind. No,
no, no. In fact, you know what?
253
00:12:28,665 --> 00:12:31,542
Girls' trip. Angela,
come on. Girls' trip.
254
00:12:34,462 --> 00:12:36,547
Oh, not even close.
255
00:12:36,631 --> 00:12:38,800
So, you keep a very tidy house.
256
00:12:38,883 --> 00:12:41,970
You should see our bathroom
after Michael takes a bath.
257
00:12:42,053 --> 00:12:43,263
(Laughs)
258
00:12:43,471 --> 00:12:45,431
But I don't have
to tell you, Pam.
259
00:12:45,515 --> 00:12:47,267
Oh, yeah...
260
00:12:47,350 --> 00:12:48,434
What?
261
00:12:48,518 --> 00:12:52,230
Oh, don't tell me that he's really
changed since you guys dated.
262
00:12:52,313 --> 00:12:53,606
Oh, are you joking?
263
00:12:53,690 --> 00:12:57,819
No, Michael told me a little bit about
it, but I see the way you look at him.
264
00:12:57,902 --> 00:13:00,238
I have never, ever dated
265
00:13:00,321 --> 00:13:04,742
or wanted to do anything
resembling dating Michael, ever.
266
00:13:04,826 --> 00:13:09,080
Not ever, not now, not then,
not now, not ever, ever.
267
00:13:09,163 --> 00:13:11,207
I've noticed how you
look at him at the office.
268
00:13:11,291 --> 00:13:12,292
Jan: Mmm-hmm.
269
00:13:15,753 --> 00:13:20,550
So, I spend most of my
time right here. Have a hand.
270
00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:23,094
So, Jim, I noticed you
checking out jan's candles.
271
00:13:23,177 --> 00:13:25,138
Oh, no, shejust put it
in front of my face.
272
00:13:25,221 --> 00:13:28,266
Yeah, did you know that candles
273
00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:32,270
are the number-one fastest-growing
product in the scent-aroma market?
274
00:13:32,353 --> 00:13:36,399
$2 billion a year industry.
And for only $10,000,
275
00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:40,278
you could become a co-owner
of "Serenity by jan."
276
00:13:40,361 --> 00:13:42,989
Vvhatdoyouthmk aboutthaf?
Thoughtabouth. Pmin.
277
00:13:43,072 --> 00:13:47,368
I'm sorry, are you really trying to
get us to invest in jan's company?
278
00:13:48,161 --> 00:13:49,245
I'm sorry.
279
00:13:49,537 --> 00:13:50,872
(Doorbell rings)
280
00:13:51,331 --> 00:13:52,498
What now?
281
00:13:53,541 --> 00:13:54,959
Coming.
282
00:13:55,835 --> 00:13:57,253
Hello.
283
00:13:57,337 --> 00:13:58,755
Jan: What are you doing here?
284
00:13:58,838 --> 00:14:02,467
We came here to eat dinner and
to party. This is a dinner party, right?
285
00:14:02,550 --> 00:14:04,218
Awesome! What is he doing here?
286
00:14:04,385 --> 00:14:05,678
Yes, what are you doing here?
287
00:14:05,762 --> 00:14:07,305
Dwight is my friend.
288
00:14:08,389 --> 00:14:10,141
We weren't invited?
289
00:14:10,224 --> 00:14:15,021
You said that I could not invite Dwight
because he was not part of a couple,
290
00:14:15,104 --> 00:14:18,066
and because we didn't have
enough wine glasses.
291
00:14:18,149 --> 00:14:21,319
Dwight brought glasses
and a person.
292
00:14:21,402 --> 00:14:23,029
Jan: Fine. Whatever you want.
293
00:14:23,112 --> 00:14:24,655
Just like always.
Whatever you want.
294
00:14:24,739 --> 00:14:27,283
Whatever I want?
It's never whatever I want.
295
00:14:27,867 --> 00:14:30,495
It's fine, Michael. When
I wanted to see stomp
296
00:14:30,578 --> 00:14:31,722
and you wanted to see wicked,
297
00:14:31,746 --> 00:14:33,539
what did we see?
We saw wicked...
298
00:14:33,623 --> 00:14:36,459
When I said that
I wanted to have kids,
299
00:14:36,542 --> 00:14:40,171
and you said that you wanted me
to have a vasectomy, what did I do?
300
00:14:40,254 --> 00:14:42,715
And then, when you said that
you might want to have kids,
301
00:14:42,799 --> 00:14:45,718
and I wasn't so sure, who
had the vasectomy reversed?
302
00:14:45,802 --> 00:14:47,863
And then when you said you
definitely didn't want to have kids?
303
00:14:47,887 --> 00:14:49,180
Who had it reversed back?
304
00:14:49,263 --> 00:14:51,391
Snip, snap! Snip,
snap! Snip, snap!
305
00:14:51,474 --> 00:14:52,683
I did! Okay...
306
00:14:52,767 --> 00:14:57,939
You have no idea the physical to”
that three vasectomies have on a person!
307
00:14:59,065 --> 00:15:00,983
And I bought this condo
308
00:15:01,275 --> 00:15:02,777
to fill with children.
309
00:15:02,860 --> 00:15:04,195
I am so sorry
310
00:15:04,278 --> 00:15:07,490
that I don't want to bring
kids into this screwed-up world.
311
00:15:07,573 --> 00:15:08,991
Okay? But look...
I'm sorry, too.
312
00:15:09,075 --> 00:15:13,371
If you want to have kids, then fine,
you win. Let's have a (bleep) Kid!
313
00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:18,668
Do you mean it?
You want to have a kid?
314
00:15:20,294 --> 00:15:21,629
I hate my life.
315
00:15:23,047 --> 00:15:24,757
So, can we come in?
316
00:15:32,306 --> 00:15:33,474
Mmm.
317
00:15:33,808 --> 00:15:35,768
Great Turkey leg.
318
00:15:37,145 --> 00:15:39,772
(Voice breaking) Okay,
I'm just gonna check on dinner.
319
00:15:43,067 --> 00:15:45,194
Angela, would you like
some of my beet salad?
320
00:15:45,278 --> 00:15:46,737
I hate beet salad.
321
00:15:46,821 --> 00:15:48,322
It's actually really good.
322
00:15:48,406 --> 00:15:50,241
Hey, hey, hey.
323
00:15:50,324 --> 00:15:53,369
I know you love beet salad.
I've seen you eat it many times.
324
00:15:53,453 --> 00:15:58,666
The thought of popping one of your beets
into my mouth makes me want to vomit.
325
00:15:58,749 --> 00:15:59,750
Pam...
326
00:16:01,669 --> 00:16:04,589
I hope she didn't
do anything to the food.
327
00:16:05,465 --> 00:16:06,591
Like what?
328
00:16:06,674 --> 00:16:08,593
I can't prove it,
329
00:16:08,676 --> 00:16:11,679
but I think she might
be trying to poison me.
330
00:16:16,601 --> 00:16:17,828
Michael: Hey, looks great, babe.
331
00:16:17,852 --> 00:16:19,020
Jim: Yeah, it really does.
332
00:16:19,103 --> 00:16:22,356
(Whispering) I know jan
didn't poison the food. I know that.
333
00:16:22,440 --> 00:16:25,651
But if she was going to poison
the food of someone at that table,
334
00:16:25,735 --> 00:16:28,946
wouldn't it be me?
Michael's former lover.
335
00:16:36,662 --> 00:16:39,290
Can you not do that?
It's disgusting.
336
00:16:41,501 --> 00:16:43,920
You know I have soft teeth.
How could you say that?
337
00:16:44,086 --> 00:16:45,213
Oops.
338
00:16:47,798 --> 00:16:49,717
Excuse me for a second.
339
00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:58,059
So, how do you guys
know each other?
340
00:16:59,560 --> 00:17:01,020
I was his babysitter.
341
00:17:01,103 --> 00:17:03,940
And now you guys are dating?
342
00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:06,943
Purely carnal, that's
all you need to know.
343
00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:10,071
Would you write down your
e-mail? Because I have, just,
344
00:17:10,154 --> 00:17:12,240
so many questions. E-mail?
345
00:17:14,242 --> 00:17:15,576
Never mind. Okay.
346
00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:20,081
All right. There we go.
347
00:17:28,381 --> 00:17:29,382
There.
348
00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:34,053
Okay.
349
00:17:34,136 --> 00:17:36,597
Jim: That's nice. Michael:
Everybody enjoying their meal?
350
00:17:39,058 --> 00:17:40,351
Hey, babe. Michael: Yeah.
351
00:17:40,434 --> 00:17:42,794
How about we take the beer
sign down until our guests leave,
352
00:17:42,853 --> 00:17:43,933
and then we can discuss it?
353
00:17:43,980 --> 00:17:48,609
No, no. I'm gonna leave it up. I
think it ties the whole room together.
354
00:17:49,902 --> 00:17:51,028
Okay.
355
00:17:54,949 --> 00:17:56,534
(Country ballad
playing on stereo)
356
00:17:57,076 --> 00:18:00,037
Jan thinks hunter's
very talented.
357
00:18:00,121 --> 00:18:03,249
You know what? I don't
think he's that good.
358
00:18:03,332 --> 00:18:04,959
At least he's an artist.
359
00:18:05,042 --> 00:18:07,295
Bfd, I'm a screenwriter.
360
00:18:07,420 --> 00:18:10,506
And I'm a candle maker, but you
don't hear me bragging about it!
361
00:18:10,631 --> 00:18:15,386
No, all you do is you get me
to try to work on my rich friends.
362
00:18:15,469 --> 00:18:17,555
For an investment opportunity!
363
00:18:17,638 --> 00:18:20,182
Man, I would love
to burn your candles!
364
00:18:20,266 --> 00:18:21,809
You burn it, you buy it!
365
00:18:21,892 --> 00:18:24,520
Oh, good, I'll be
your first customer!
366
00:18:24,604 --> 00:18:26,397
You're hardly my first.
367
00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:27,982
That's what she said!
368
00:18:39,535 --> 00:18:43,539
That is a $200 plasma
screen TV that you just killed!
369
00:18:43,623 --> 00:18:45,958
Good luck paying me back
370
00:18:46,042 --> 00:18:49,920
on your zero-dollars-a-year
salary plus benefits, babe!
371
00:18:53,674 --> 00:18:54,800
(Door closes)
372
00:18:56,761 --> 00:18:57,928
I'm gonna get going.
373
00:18:58,012 --> 00:18:59,180
Fine, get out of here.
374
00:18:59,263 --> 00:19:00,657
Jim: It's getting late.
We should...
375
00:19:00,681 --> 00:19:04,393
You know what, you guys?
She'll be out of the bathroom soon.
376
00:19:04,477 --> 00:19:05,478
Of course.
377
00:19:05,561 --> 00:19:08,147
Dwight: Get out of my way.
I'll take care of this.
378
00:19:08,230 --> 00:19:10,191
Okay, what seems to be
the problem, officers?
379
00:19:10,274 --> 00:19:12,652
Not now, Dwight. We got
a call about a disturbance.
380
00:19:12,735 --> 00:19:15,488
No. Nope.
Nothing disturbing here.
381
00:19:15,571 --> 00:19:18,324
Just a couple of friends
having an awesome dinner party.
382
00:19:18,449 --> 00:19:20,052
Your neighbors say
they heard some shouting.
383
00:19:20,076 --> 00:19:22,453
Yes, there was screaming, but...
384
00:19:23,829 --> 00:19:28,042
My girlfriend threw a dundie
at my TV, plasma.
385
00:19:28,959 --> 00:19:30,044
You want to press charges?
386
00:19:30,127 --> 00:19:31,587
Would she get into trouble?
387
00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:33,130
Yeah, she'd be charged.
388
00:19:34,090 --> 00:19:37,093
I will take the fall. I did it.
389
00:19:37,176 --> 00:19:41,305
You know, you don't have to press charges.
You could just try to be more quiet.
390
00:19:41,389 --> 00:19:43,432
Jan: Michael! Yes.
391
00:19:43,516 --> 00:19:45,267
Wait, what are you doing to him?
392
00:19:45,351 --> 00:19:47,311
Sir, do you have any
other place you could stay?
393
00:19:47,395 --> 00:19:50,231
Maybe with one
of yourfriends, here?
394
00:19:51,565 --> 00:19:53,317
Michael can come home with me.
395
00:19:55,111 --> 00:19:56,153
Jim, Pam?
396
00:19:56,237 --> 00:19:57,780
Oh, my apartment's on fire.
397
00:19:57,863 --> 00:19:59,031
Flooded. Flooded.
398
00:19:59,115 --> 00:20:00,116
You people!
399
00:20:00,199 --> 00:20:01,909
Come on, you're
sleeping with me. No.
400
00:20:01,992 --> 00:20:03,828
I'm gonna take you
home, Michael. No.
401
00:20:05,496 --> 00:20:07,206
All right.
402
00:20:07,289 --> 00:20:08,582
Jan: Bye, babe!
403
00:20:08,708 --> 00:20:11,335
This is the best burger
I've ever had, babe.
404
00:20:11,419 --> 00:20:16,507
Babe, I should have told
you, but... I did something bad.
405
00:20:20,261 --> 00:20:22,847
I stole this. Foryou, babe.
406
00:20:26,851 --> 00:20:29,645
(Country ballad
playing on stereo)
407
00:20:40,114 --> 00:20:41,323
Pam: (Singing) One night
408
00:20:41,407 --> 00:20:42,825
I love that.
29744
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