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1
00:00:01,919 --> 00:00:03,855
I really didn't think I was gonna
have a good time, but I did.
2
00:00:03,879 --> 00:00:07,716
I totally did. I love camping.
Anything can happen.
3
00:00:07,799 --> 00:00:11,094
Oh, itwasn't camping. It was
more of a wilderness retreat.
4
00:00:11,178 --> 00:00:12,387
Morning. Michael.
5
00:00:12,554 --> 00:00:15,432
Ryan invited some of the branch
managers and Toby into the woods
6
00:00:15,516 --> 00:00:19,978
for a get-to-know-you weekend.
Michael wasn't invited.
7
00:00:21,605 --> 00:00:25,234
Apparently they already knew
everything they needed to know about him.
8
00:00:25,317 --> 00:00:26,485
Did you sleep in cabins?
9
00:00:26,568 --> 00:00:29,696
Under the stars. It
was really beautiful.
10
00:00:29,780 --> 00:00:33,325
You should come. Bob and I
took rock climbing lessons once.
11
00:00:33,408 --> 00:00:35,160
(Michael laughing)
12
00:00:36,745 --> 00:00:39,748
Michael wasn't invited
on Ryan's camping trip.
13
00:00:39,831 --> 00:00:41,917
Toby went,
but Michael didn't go.
14
00:00:42,709 --> 00:00:44,169
He wasn't invited.
15
00:00:44,670 --> 00:00:48,090
Who went? Me, Dan from
buffalo, Mark chisholm,
16
00:00:48,173 --> 00:00:51,969
Jack from Albany, and Ryan,
obviously. We ate so many s'mores
17
00:00:52,052 --> 00:00:56,431
I finally had to say, "no more
s'mores. No more s'mores."
18
00:01:00,769 --> 00:01:04,523
Ryan invited me to go on his
wilderness adventure retreat.
19
00:01:04,606 --> 00:01:07,276
It was this amazing,
beautiful...
20
00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:10,779
Hey. Nobody cares. Nobody cares.
21
00:01:11,405 --> 00:01:14,741
I need that room at some
point, sojust wrap it up.
22
00:01:16,034 --> 00:01:17,661
Michael wasn't invited.
23
00:01:39,057 --> 00:01:42,811
Hypothetically, if I were
to ask you to go camping.
24
00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:46,148
And... do you know
what "hypothetical" means?
25
00:01:46,231 --> 00:01:47,316
Not real. Got it.
26
00:01:47,399 --> 00:01:50,819
So if I were to hypothetically
ask you to go camping with me,
27
00:01:51,612 --> 00:01:53,238
would you go? Absolutely. Yes.
28
00:01:53,614 --> 00:01:56,950
When Michael plays the
hypothetical game, I always say yes.
29
00:01:57,034 --> 00:01:58,702
Really? Yeah.
30
00:01:58,785 --> 00:02:00,162
Oh, do you want to go today?
31
00:02:00,245 --> 00:02:02,164
And I am always busy.
32
00:02:02,247 --> 00:02:05,500
Oh, I can't go today
because I'm donating blood.
33
00:02:05,584 --> 00:02:08,795
How often can you
actually donate blood?
34
00:02:08,879 --> 00:02:10,213
Is there a limit? I don't...
35
00:02:10,297 --> 00:02:12,341
Your body only
has a certain amount.
36
00:02:12,424 --> 00:02:14,384
Well. Is that it? Or...
37
00:02:14,468 --> 00:02:17,012
Yeah. Just this whole
Toby camping thing.
38
00:02:17,095 --> 00:02:20,307
I don't know, seems a little
lame. I mean... how so?
39
00:02:20,390 --> 00:02:23,435
A bunch of guys
in a tent making s'mores.
40
00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:29,024
What's that? Oh, I'm
on broken mountain.
41
00:02:29,107 --> 00:02:31,276
Here's the thing. That's
not how you go camping.
42
00:02:31,360 --> 00:02:35,072
I think you go camping
by yourself in the wilderness.
43
00:02:35,155 --> 00:02:40,202
It's not with a group of guys
frolicking around in tents. It's one guy
44
00:02:40,285 --> 00:02:42,680
or two guys, ifyour plans change.
They're not going to change.
45
00:02:42,704 --> 00:02:45,957
I want to do it myself.
You know, I want to go
46
00:02:46,041 --> 00:02:48,126
and find out something
about myself.
47
00:02:48,210 --> 00:02:54,800
I want to get out of here. All the cliques
and the office politics, fluorescent lights.
48
00:02:54,883 --> 00:02:56,426
And the asbestos.
49
00:02:56,510 --> 00:02:57,790
I thought we had that looked at.
50
00:02:57,844 --> 00:03:00,263
I'm sick of it, Jim.
I'm sick of this place.
51
00:03:00,514 --> 00:03:05,560
When jan and I had satellite, we used to
watch a reality show called survivorman.
52
00:03:05,644 --> 00:03:10,941
And it was interesting because it
was about a guy who would go out
53
00:03:11,024 --> 00:03:15,028
into the middle of nowhere
and just try not to die,
54
00:03:15,112 --> 00:03:17,197
try not to get eaten
by an animal,
55
00:03:17,280 --> 00:03:20,283
or be overexposed.
56
00:03:20,450 --> 00:03:24,705
Okay, I will only need two things,
a roll of duct tape and a knife.
57
00:03:25,288 --> 00:03:27,541
I'm on it. Okay.
Thirty minutes or less.
58
00:03:27,624 --> 00:03:29,126
Please come back.
59
00:03:29,209 --> 00:03:32,546
Save the receipts. Hey, what...
60
00:03:32,629 --> 00:03:36,508
Let's see if any of these will
work. Hey. Hey. Dwight. Dwight...
61
00:03:36,758 --> 00:03:40,095
I keep various weaponry
strategically placed around the office.
62
00:03:40,178 --> 00:03:44,224
I saved Jim's life with a can of pepper
spray I had velcroed under my desk.
63
00:03:45,142 --> 00:03:50,605
People say, "oh, it's dangerous to keep
weapons in the home or the workplace."
64
00:03:50,814 --> 00:03:55,694
Well, I say it's better to be hurt by
someone you know, accidentally,
65
00:03:55,777 --> 00:03:58,238
than by a stranger on purpose.
66
00:04:00,365 --> 00:04:04,870
Dwight and I are going out.
He will return later, but I will not.
67
00:04:04,953 --> 00:04:08,623
I will also be taking
a personal day tomorrow
68
00:04:08,707 --> 00:04:10,792
and perhaps the next day.
69
00:04:10,876 --> 00:04:12,476
Do you want me to ask
where you're going?
70
00:04:13,545 --> 00:04:15,130
Great. Dwight will be driving me
71
00:04:15,213 --> 00:04:17,299
deep into the Pennsylvania
wilderness. Oh.
72
00:04:17,382 --> 00:04:19,384
Where he will then leave me
73
00:04:19,468 --> 00:04:23,972
to either die or to survive.
The choice is yours.
74
00:04:24,055 --> 00:04:28,059
No. The choice is actually yours.
Are you sure you want to do this?
75
00:04:28,143 --> 00:04:32,856
Yes. And I am leaving you in charge
of the office for the rest of the day,
76
00:04:32,939 --> 00:04:35,776
and for the next several days.
Do not try to follow me.
77
00:04:35,859 --> 00:04:39,446
Okay. Great. This is a very
personal, private experience
78
00:04:39,529 --> 00:04:43,366
in the wild that I wish to
share with me, myself and I.
79
00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:48,330
When I return, I hope to be a
completely changed human being.
80
00:04:48,413 --> 00:04:49,414
That'd be great.
81
00:04:49,498 --> 00:04:52,334
Do I believe that Michael
possesses the skills
82
00:04:52,417 --> 00:04:55,086
to survive in
a hostile environment?
83
00:04:56,254 --> 00:04:59,633
Let's put it this way.
No, I do not.
84
00:05:01,510 --> 00:05:03,678
This is what a true
survivorman does.
85
00:05:03,762 --> 00:05:07,516
You simulate a disaster,
like a plane wreck.
86
00:05:07,599 --> 00:05:09,768
You can only wear the
clothes that you have on,
87
00:05:09,851 --> 00:05:12,479
and you can only use the stuff
that you have in your pockets.
88
00:05:12,562 --> 00:05:17,108
Now in this case, this
disaster is a serial killer,
89
00:05:17,192 --> 00:05:21,988
creepy guy who's abducted me,
and is taking me out into the wilderness
90
00:05:22,072 --> 00:05:24,300
to leave me for dead. No. I
would never leave you for dead.
91
00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:27,202
You would never escape. Well,
yes, I would. And I would survive.
92
00:05:27,285 --> 00:05:28,954
I would make sure
that you were dead. No.
93
00:05:29,037 --> 00:05:31,318
Then I would remove your teeth
and cut off your fingertips
94
00:05:31,373 --> 00:05:32,791
so you could
notbeidenfified. You_.
95
00:05:32,874 --> 00:05:34,268
And they would call me
the overkill killer.
96
00:05:34,292 --> 00:05:39,381
You are as creepy as a real
serial killer, for real. Okay...
97
00:05:39,464 --> 00:05:43,093
What are you doing? I am putting
this on so I have no familiarity
98
00:05:43,176 --> 00:05:44,845
with my surroundings.
99
00:05:44,928 --> 00:05:47,514
Now this way I can't
retrace my steps.
100
00:05:47,597 --> 00:05:51,309
I don't know what streets
we... ow! What are you doing?
101
00:05:51,393 --> 00:05:53,233
It would be better if you
were unconscious. No.
102
00:05:53,311 --> 00:05:55,856
Here... god. Dwight,
stop it. Stop it. Stop it.
103
00:05:55,939 --> 00:05:57,732
Do you want to do
this right or not?
104
00:05:57,816 --> 00:06:02,195
Just please allow me to have
one cathartic experience in my life.
105
00:06:04,281 --> 00:06:07,534
Jim, we need to order a
cake for creed's birthday.
106
00:06:07,617 --> 00:06:09,097
Oh, wasn't it just
someone's birthday?
107
00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:11,913
Yes. Kelly's was
last week, remember?
108
00:06:11,997 --> 00:06:14,541
I do remember, yeah.
It's birthday month.
109
00:06:14,624 --> 00:06:19,546
Creed's is today, Oscar's is week after
next, Meredith's is at the end of the month.
110
00:06:19,629 --> 00:06:21,315
Michael usually goes with
red and white streamers...
111
00:06:21,339 --> 00:06:25,302
You know what? I have an idea. Why
don't we just do one big, shared party?
112
00:06:25,927 --> 00:06:26,928
What?
113
00:06:27,012 --> 00:06:31,600
There are 13 people working
in this office, so 13 times a year,
114
00:06:31,683 --> 00:06:34,352
Michael gets a cake and balloons
115
00:06:34,895 --> 00:06:38,189
and some sort of joke gift
and makes a toast.
116
00:06:38,315 --> 00:06:42,152
And there are two types of toasts.
One is a joke about how old you are...
117
00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:46,239
Look at those wrinkles. Blacks
do crack. Not crack the drug.
118
00:06:46,323 --> 00:06:51,870
And the other is something
inappropriate or horrible or both.
119
00:06:52,454 --> 00:06:55,707
What else? He only sings the
high Harmony to happy birthday.
120
00:06:55,790 --> 00:06:57,959
(All singing)
121
00:06:58,376 --> 00:07:01,212
And he is a very big believer
in surprise parties.
122
00:07:01,296 --> 00:07:03,924
Maybe even, arguably,
possibly to a fault.
123
00:07:04,007 --> 00:07:05,383
Happy birthday!
124
00:07:05,467 --> 00:07:07,010
Happy birthday!
125
00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:08,637
(Laughing)
126
00:07:09,095 --> 00:07:10,597
Happy birthday!
127
00:07:11,473 --> 00:07:15,727
So I think, yeah, I think getting these
out of the way might be productive.
128
00:07:15,810 --> 00:07:16,937
Yeah.
129
00:07:17,020 --> 00:07:20,941
We can just have one big, fun
party. And everybody's happy
130
00:07:21,024 --> 00:07:22,192
and nobody wastes their time.
131
00:07:22,275 --> 00:07:24,194
I don't like it.
132
00:07:28,657 --> 00:07:31,743
Wow. You're shaking
things up a bit, huh?
133
00:07:31,826 --> 00:07:33,495
It's a pretty good idea,
don't you think?
134
00:07:33,578 --> 00:07:37,832
Do you think it's a good idea?
No. I think it's a great idea.
135
00:07:39,250 --> 00:07:40,251
Hmm.
136
00:07:42,379 --> 00:07:43,797
We're here.
137
00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:51,513
Dwight will take my blindfold off
when we are deep in the forest.
138
00:07:51,596 --> 00:07:53,473
Just the two of us
from this point out.
139
00:07:53,556 --> 00:07:56,017
Here we go. Just the two of us.
140
00:07:59,229 --> 00:08:02,524
Dwight: Here we go into
the wild, to the mighty forest.
141
00:08:04,359 --> 00:08:06,736
Can you smell the trees
and the nature?
142
00:08:07,988 --> 00:08:09,656
Keep going. You're fine.
143
00:08:10,240 --> 00:08:12,409
Just some bushes
and some thickets.
144
00:08:15,036 --> 00:08:16,162
Keep going.
145
00:08:17,956 --> 00:08:20,208
You wanted wilderness.
You got it.
146
00:08:20,625 --> 00:08:22,186
You know, try sending
them another invoice.
147
00:08:22,210 --> 00:08:23,545
Okay. All right.
148
00:08:24,045 --> 00:08:26,423
Oh, did you see my memo,
by the way?
149
00:08:29,134 --> 00:08:31,052
"Let's be honest,
as fun as birthdays are,
150
00:08:31,136 --> 00:08:33,016
"we all can use a break
from the constant cakes.
151
00:08:33,096 --> 00:08:36,057
"So let's celebrate birthday
month in style today."
152
00:08:37,058 --> 00:08:39,352
This is really cool.
153
00:08:40,061 --> 00:08:42,355
Right? I was just thinking...
154
00:08:42,439 --> 00:08:44,441
No. Totally. Totally.
155
00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:48,111
This way we get it all out of the way
at once and it could actually be fun.
156
00:08:48,194 --> 00:08:51,114
Right. Exactly.
157
00:08:52,282 --> 00:08:53,616
I knew I could count on you.
158
00:08:56,286 --> 00:08:58,163
As good a spot as any.
159
00:09:03,418 --> 00:09:05,336
What are you doing? Stop it.
160
00:09:05,420 --> 00:09:07,297
Dwight, just stop it.
I'm just...
161
00:09:07,380 --> 00:09:10,717
Spin. I'm trying to confuse
your sense of direction.
162
00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:18,308
Behold.
163
00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:19,976
All right, good.
Thank you, Dwight.
164
00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:21,978
Here's your knife. Thank you.
165
00:09:22,062 --> 00:09:23,730
And here's your duct tape. Good.
166
00:09:23,813 --> 00:09:25,982
All right. Very good.
167
00:09:26,066 --> 00:09:28,693
Okay. Yeah.
168
00:09:29,110 --> 00:09:31,571
Good luck, Michael.
Thanks for the ride.
169
00:09:34,032 --> 00:09:35,450
Okay.
170
00:09:36,826 --> 00:09:38,495
Leave me be, Dwight.
171
00:09:40,830 --> 00:09:43,708
Hey, Jim, can I have my
own cake? What's that?
172
00:09:43,792 --> 00:09:45,376
I really prefer
devil's food cake.
173
00:09:45,460 --> 00:09:46,586
Oh, sure.
174
00:09:46,669 --> 00:09:47,837
Okay. Yes.
175
00:09:47,921 --> 00:09:49,005
Awesome.
176
00:09:49,380 --> 00:09:50,423
Wow. That was easy.
177
00:09:50,507 --> 00:09:52,342
Yeah. People like me, I guess.
178
00:09:52,425 --> 00:09:53,551
Jim.
179
00:09:54,385 --> 00:09:56,387
I hate devil's food. Well,
I think Meredith was...
180
00:09:56,471 --> 00:09:58,098
Screw Meredith.
I don't think it's fair
181
00:09:58,181 --> 00:10:00,141
to let someone else pick
the cake on my birthday.
182
00:10:00,225 --> 00:10:02,435
Everybody's birthday.
Today is actually my birthday
183
00:10:02,519 --> 00:10:04,479
and I want to pick the cake.
What do you want?
184
00:10:04,562 --> 00:10:06,457
I want pie. I want peach
pie. You want birthday pie?
185
00:10:06,481 --> 00:10:07,524
I want a nice cobbler.
186
00:10:07,607 --> 00:10:09,960
I'll talk to Angela and we're going
to see what we can do about a pie.
187
00:10:09,984 --> 00:10:11,754
I don't care who you talk
to. Just make it happen.
188
00:10:11,778 --> 00:10:13,863
It'll be Angela. You
tell her it's for creed.
189
00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:15,365
She'll know what that means.
190
00:10:21,830 --> 00:10:26,501
Day one. I'm in the interior of
the vast Pennsylvania wilderness.
191
00:10:27,502 --> 00:10:30,380
I have broughtwith me
only the bare essentials,
192
00:10:30,463 --> 00:10:33,716
a knife, a roll of duct tape
193
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:38,179
in case I need to fashion a shelter
or make some sort of water vessel.
194
00:10:39,180 --> 00:10:44,727
It's hot today. The sun is in
the two-thirds easterly quadrant,
195
00:10:44,811 --> 00:10:50,150
which would make it about 2:00
in the afternoon.
196
00:10:50,233 --> 00:10:52,527
Really beating down on me now.
197
00:10:52,610 --> 00:10:57,282
I think that I want to get
a little more comfortable
198
00:10:57,782 --> 00:11:02,412
because the sun is
depleting my resources.
199
00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:05,665
Okay. There we go.
200
00:11:05,748 --> 00:11:10,211
Watch that I don't hit
my carotid artery here.
201
00:11:10,295 --> 00:11:14,841
I lied to Michael. I said that I
would leave him alone, but I will not.
202
00:11:14,924 --> 00:11:18,595
I will remain close by to
provide unseen moral support.
203
00:11:18,678 --> 00:11:20,430
But I will never help him.
204
00:11:20,763 --> 00:11:25,476
I will let harm befall him.
I will even let him die.
205
00:11:25,560 --> 00:11:28,229
But I will never let him
lose his dignity.
206
00:11:28,646 --> 00:11:31,065
There we go. Much better.
207
00:11:31,149 --> 00:11:36,070
Now everything I
broughtwith me can be used.
208
00:11:36,154 --> 00:11:38,489
My sport coat here
209
00:11:38,573 --> 00:11:43,203
can be fashioned
into a backpack of sorts.
210
00:11:43,286 --> 00:11:49,209
I'm going to wear what was
once one of my pant legs.
211
00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:54,839
See, this is a beautiful
piece of material.
212
00:11:54,923 --> 00:11:59,844
This can be used for all sorts
of things, some sort of kerchief
213
00:12:01,429 --> 00:12:04,390
to keep my neck
nice and comfortable.
214
00:12:07,185 --> 00:12:09,145
Andy. Jimbo.
215
00:12:09,229 --> 00:12:13,274
Me likey the ice cream
cake, okay? Fudgie the whale.
216
00:12:13,358 --> 00:12:16,486
Not your birthday. Well,
I'm just saying, you know,
217
00:12:16,569 --> 00:12:18,613
if you want to make
people happy, namely me,
218
00:12:18,696 --> 00:12:20,448
you will have
a fudgie the whale.
219
00:12:20,531 --> 00:12:23,701
All right. I'll look into
it, but the answer's no.
220
00:12:24,410 --> 00:12:26,454
Well, okay. Harsh.
221
00:12:26,871 --> 00:12:28,414
Just don't expect me to show up.
222
00:12:28,498 --> 00:12:31,876
Hey, Andy, I have some
calls to make. Loud and clear.
223
00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:33,336
All right.
224
00:12:36,297 --> 00:12:39,133
Pizza rolls. Okay, I'm going
to go into this office here
225
00:12:39,217 --> 00:12:40,802
to do some work
so I will be in here.
226
00:12:40,885 --> 00:12:41,970
Mushroom caps.
227
00:12:42,387 --> 00:12:46,808
I am totally alone right now
with only my thoughts.
228
00:12:46,891 --> 00:12:49,477
I love it. I'm loving it.
229
00:12:50,812 --> 00:12:55,483
I can literally say anything I
want. No one is going to hear me.
230
00:12:56,401 --> 00:12:59,779
Wish I could have gone
with Ryan on that cool retreat.
231
00:13:00,697 --> 00:13:02,824
Jan has plastic boobs.
232
00:13:03,658 --> 00:13:07,745
I have hemorrhoids.
233
00:13:10,623 --> 00:13:12,542
Doesn't even matter.
234
00:13:12,625 --> 00:13:15,545
Michael's a man of
great depth and passion.
235
00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:20,133
I don't know what he's
searching for out here.
236
00:13:24,679 --> 00:13:26,306
But I hope he finds it.
237
00:13:29,475 --> 00:13:30,685
Lunch.
238
00:13:31,394 --> 00:13:35,231
Well. It is a little chillier
than I had thought.
239
00:13:35,315 --> 00:13:37,942
So I have fashioned my hat
back into my pants.
240
00:13:39,193 --> 00:13:42,405
Several hours in, it's time for
me to find some nourishment.
241
00:13:42,488 --> 00:13:46,617
Now these woods are full of
creatures that can sustain human life.
242
00:13:46,701 --> 00:13:49,996
Things like squirrels,
243
00:13:50,079 --> 00:13:53,249
a nice, juicy rabbit
would be delicious.
244
00:13:55,209 --> 00:13:57,128
About two more minutes.
245
00:13:59,088 --> 00:14:04,844
I have made this spear with
which I will impale my dinner.
246
00:14:07,180 --> 00:14:08,699
And that couldn't come
a moment too soon,
247
00:14:08,723 --> 00:14:12,226
because I have been
without food for a good
248
00:14:12,894 --> 00:14:14,562
three hours or so.
249
00:14:15,605 --> 00:14:18,024
Starting to feel it
a little bit.
250
00:14:19,609 --> 00:14:21,277
(Sighs)
251
00:14:22,945 --> 00:14:24,781
It's creed's birthday today.
252
00:14:25,865 --> 00:14:29,494
(Singing) Happy birthday to you
253
00:14:30,370 --> 00:14:34,499
happy birthday to you
254
00:14:34,582 --> 00:14:40,129
(singing high Harmony)
Happy birthday, dear creed
255
00:14:40,797 --> 00:14:47,470
happy birthday to you
256
00:14:48,554 --> 00:14:50,390
happy birthday, buddy.
257
00:14:51,557 --> 00:14:55,395
What is Jim thinking? It's a birthday.
So what if there's a lot of them?
258
00:14:55,478 --> 00:15:01,317
Yeah. I work hard all day. I like
knowing that there's going to be a break.
259
00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:04,112
Most days I just sit
and wait for the break.
260
00:15:04,195 --> 00:15:07,907
I took an extra shot of Insulin in
preparation for this cake today.
261
00:15:07,990 --> 00:15:10,493
If I don't have some
cake soon, I might die.
262
00:15:10,576 --> 00:15:11,762
Why don't you just
have an apple?
263
00:15:11,786 --> 00:15:13,204
Why don't you
mind your business?
264
00:15:13,287 --> 00:15:14,539
Listen, I figured this out.
265
00:15:14,622 --> 00:15:18,501
Jimmy had his birthday three
weeks ago so he doesn't care.
266
00:15:18,584 --> 00:15:20,464
I think the power went to
his head. Creed: Yeah.
267
00:15:20,503 --> 00:15:22,046
Hey, Jim. Hey, guys.
268
00:15:22,130 --> 00:15:25,800
What are we talking about?
Nothing. Nothing going on.
269
00:15:25,883 --> 00:15:29,303
We're talking about nothing.
Come on, gang.
270
00:15:34,350 --> 00:15:37,770
Well, if you take a look
at this, I tented my pants.
271
00:15:38,563 --> 00:15:42,692
I've made myself
a nice pants tent shelter.
272
00:15:43,443 --> 00:15:46,279
And this little guy may be
dunder Mifflin paper some day.
273
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:54,704
Nothing to worry about.
Just using the scope.
274
00:15:54,787 --> 00:15:58,249
Safety is on.
275
00:16:00,543 --> 00:16:01,961
(Knocking on door)
276
00:16:02,295 --> 00:16:03,296
Hey, Jim.
277
00:16:04,547 --> 00:16:07,300
Hey, I just got the word
on the communal birthdays.
278
00:16:07,383 --> 00:16:09,385
Great idea.
279
00:16:10,761 --> 00:16:12,680
Oh, thanks, man. Yeah.
280
00:16:16,809 --> 00:16:18,144
Is there anything I can...
281
00:16:18,227 --> 00:16:19,979
My birthday was two months ago.
282
00:16:20,062 --> 00:16:21,063
Oh, okay.
283
00:16:21,147 --> 00:16:22,773
There was no party.
284
00:16:22,857 --> 00:16:27,111
What? Well, there was
but Michael scheduled it for
285
00:16:27,195 --> 00:16:30,656
4:58 on a Friday. People
sang in the parking lot.
286
00:16:30,740 --> 00:16:31,741
I remember that.
287
00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:33,218
I don't know, I just
thought maybe you
288
00:16:33,242 --> 00:16:35,745
comdinduderne. Senousw?
289
00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:38,956
I just thought you could add me in. I
don't know what the harm in that is.
290
00:16:39,290 --> 00:16:43,544
Toby's great. He's great. But
sometimes he can be a little bit much.
291
00:16:43,628 --> 00:16:48,633
"I don't see the harm in that."
Well, it's a cake, Toby, so come on.
292
00:16:48,716 --> 00:16:50,861
Okay, yeah, you know what,
we're just going to throw you in
293
00:16:50,885 --> 00:16:52,070
because the more,
the merrier, right?
294
00:16:52,094 --> 00:16:55,806
No. No way.
I am not a machine, Jim.
295
00:16:55,890 --> 00:16:59,810
You can't just change plans Willy-nilly
and expect these little magic party elves
296
00:16:59,894 --> 00:17:02,063
to do your bidding.
We already have devil's food,
297
00:17:02,146 --> 00:17:05,274
peach cobbler, fudgie the
whale, mushroom caps...
298
00:17:05,358 --> 00:17:06,734
I'm allergic to mushrooms.
299
00:17:06,817 --> 00:17:08,986
That's a bummer. Okay.
300
00:17:09,070 --> 00:17:11,489
Then we need to...
301
00:17:11,572 --> 00:17:14,510
Hey, everybody. Hi, how are you
doing? Could I have your attention, please?
302
00:17:14,534 --> 00:17:16,661
'Cause we have to talk
about this birthday thing.
303
00:17:16,744 --> 00:17:18,955
Conference room? Yes.
Conference room. Five minutes.
304
00:17:19,038 --> 00:17:23,125
No. No. We're going
to solve it right here.
305
00:17:23,209 --> 00:17:25,086
We're going to actually
talk about it out here.
306
00:17:25,169 --> 00:17:28,506
So who has problems
with the birthday thing?
307
00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:32,468
One, two, three, everybody.
Okay, so then we just shouldn't do it.
308
00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:35,012
What am I supposed to do
with two cakes and a pie?
309
00:17:35,096 --> 00:17:37,807
I'll take them. Well,
nobody's touching my cobbler.
310
00:17:37,890 --> 00:17:39,892
Hey, Michael. I mean Jim.
311
00:17:41,394 --> 00:17:44,105
Yeah. Phyllis called me Michael.
312
00:17:45,439 --> 00:17:48,317
And I will always and forever
be haunted by that fact.
313
00:17:48,943 --> 00:17:53,155
Under this tree, I think I
struck the mother lode.
314
00:17:53,239 --> 00:17:58,452
Those are nature's
best mushrooms.
315
00:17:58,536 --> 00:18:03,541
Wild, and I have to say, these
little buggers are damn tasty as well.
316
00:18:03,624 --> 00:18:06,043
Dwight: (Screaming)
Stop. No. No, Michael.
317
00:18:06,127 --> 00:18:09,672
No. No. No.
318
00:18:13,259 --> 00:18:14,594
Get them out.
319
00:18:17,930 --> 00:18:22,476
(All singing)
Happy birthday to you
320
00:18:22,560 --> 00:18:26,772
happy birthday to you
321
00:18:26,856 --> 00:18:32,278
(singing high Harmony)
Happy birthday, dear creed
322
00:18:32,361 --> 00:18:37,825
happy birthday to you
323
00:18:37,908 --> 00:18:40,286
yeah. All right.
324
00:18:40,369 --> 00:18:44,123
Skip around the room. Skip
around the room. We won't...
325
00:18:44,206 --> 00:18:47,710
Okay, all right, yikes. Don't do
that. You're going to break something.
326
00:18:47,918 --> 00:18:53,424
Man became civilized for a reason.
He decided that he liked to have warmth
327
00:18:53,507 --> 00:18:55,926
and clothing and television,
328
00:18:56,218 --> 00:18:59,138
and hamburgers,
and to walk upright,
329
00:18:59,221 --> 00:19:02,683
and to have a soft futon
at the end of the day.
330
00:19:02,767 --> 00:19:05,394
He didn't want to have
to struggle to survive.
331
00:19:05,603 --> 00:19:09,774
I don't need the woods.
I have a nice wood desk.
332
00:19:10,941 --> 00:19:13,110
I don't need fresh air
333
00:19:13,194 --> 00:19:16,572
because I have the
freshest air around, ac.
334
00:19:18,074 --> 00:19:20,493
And I don't need
wide open spaces.
335
00:19:22,078 --> 00:19:23,329
Check it out.
336
00:19:26,499 --> 00:19:28,584
I can also make it the sky.
337
00:19:32,254 --> 00:19:33,881
Hey. Hl buddy.
338
00:19:33,964 --> 00:19:35,049
What's up?
339
00:19:35,633 --> 00:19:37,718
I'm sure glad you're back.
340
00:19:37,885 --> 00:19:39,345
You are relieved.
341
00:19:39,428 --> 00:19:40,846
You have no idea.
342
00:19:41,972 --> 00:19:43,683
So what did I miss?
343
00:19:43,808 --> 00:19:46,102
Well, I tried to put all the
birthdays together at once.
344
00:19:46,185 --> 00:19:47,895
So, terrible idea. Oh.
345
00:19:47,978 --> 00:19:52,024
Yeah. Okay, I did that.
Rookie mistake.
346
00:19:52,108 --> 00:19:55,695
You did do it? Yeah. Just wait.
347
00:19:55,778 --> 00:19:58,072
Ten years, you'll figure it out.
348
00:19:58,155 --> 00:20:01,117
Well, I don't think I'll be
here in ten years, but...
349
00:20:02,243 --> 00:20:03,744
That's what I said.
350
00:20:08,374 --> 00:20:09,917
That's what she said.
351
00:20:13,295 --> 00:20:14,714
That's what who said?
352
00:20:14,797 --> 00:20:16,424
I never know.
353
00:20:17,174 --> 00:20:21,345
But I just say it. I say
stuff like that, you know,
354
00:20:22,304 --> 00:20:25,433
to lighten the tension
when things sort of get hard.
355
00:20:25,516 --> 00:20:27,393
That's what she said.
356
00:20:27,476 --> 00:20:30,062
Hey. Nice.
357
00:20:31,272 --> 00:20:32,440
Really good.
358
00:20:34,942 --> 00:20:37,820
Bravo, my young ward.
27284
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