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1
00:00:01,961 --> 00:00:04,003
[dramatic music]
2
00:00:04,046 --> 00:00:05,337
- Hot cocoa-
3
00:00:05,381 --> 00:00:08,924
It's warm, sweet,
and feels good in your tummy.
4
00:00:09,051 --> 00:00:11,176
But what doesn't feel good
in your tummy?
5
00:00:11,220 --> 00:00:12,636
A sharpened moose femur
6
00:00:12,638 --> 00:00:15,180
Wielded by a crazed
ritualistic killer.
7
00:00:15,266 --> 00:00:18,559
This is the fifth animal-bone
murder here in grimsburg,
8
00:00:18,602 --> 00:00:20,644
The work of an unknown
serial killer
9
00:00:20,688 --> 00:00:22,813
Who the media are calling
10
00:00:22,857 --> 00:00:24,064
The boner.
11
00:00:24,066 --> 00:00:25,315
[dramatic sting]
12
00:00:25,359 --> 00:00:27,818
With kgrm
homicides-on-the-ones,
13
00:00:27,862 --> 00:00:29,153
I'm harmony flute.
14
00:00:29,154 --> 00:00:30,613
- And I'm her ex-husband,
marvin flute,
15
00:00:30,614 --> 00:00:32,198
Grimsburg's greatest
detective who's back
16
00:00:32,199 --> 00:00:33,658
From a much-needed
nervous breakdown
17
00:00:33,659 --> 00:00:35,368
To make this town safer
and handsomer.
18
00:00:35,369 --> 00:00:37,119
- Flute,
I was just signing off.
19
00:00:37,120 --> 00:00:38,329
- And I'll get my hands
on this boner,
20
00:00:38,330 --> 00:00:39,913
No matter how hard it gets.
21
00:00:39,957 --> 00:00:41,582
Over to you, hank.
22
00:00:41,709 --> 00:00:43,042
- Oh, you always do this.
23
00:00:43,044 --> 00:00:44,364
It's always the flute show.
24
00:00:44,365 --> 00:00:46,254
I'm the one who gets
to throw the anchor.
25
00:00:46,255 --> 00:00:48,214
And who is hank?
We don't even have a hank.
26
00:00:48,215 --> 00:00:49,758
- Well, you should
look into getting one.
27
00:00:49,759 --> 00:00:51,175
Hank is a strong anchor name.
28
00:00:51,176 --> 00:00:52,427
Ends with a k,
like the word fork,
29
00:00:52,428 --> 00:00:54,219
The most masculine utensil
of all.
30
00:00:54,220 --> 00:00:55,889
And pork,
the most masculine meat.
31
00:00:55,890 --> 00:00:58,641
And of course, sink, the most
masculine place to urinate.
32
00:00:58,642 --> 00:01:00,934
- How about suck?
As in you.
33
00:01:00,936 --> 00:01:02,269
- Now you get it.
34
00:01:02,270 --> 00:01:03,313
- Oh, you know
who'd love this game?
35
00:01:03,314 --> 00:01:05,272
- We don't have a hank!
- Hank.
36
00:01:05,357 --> 00:01:06,482
Heh.
37
00:01:06,525 --> 00:01:07,816
Back to you, hank.
38
00:01:07,943 --> 00:01:10,819
[dramatic music]
39
00:01:10,946 --> 00:01:18,035
♪ ♪
40
00:01:30,341 --> 00:01:32,216
"the flute show."
please.
41
00:01:32,217 --> 00:01:33,760
It's not all about me, right?
42
00:01:33,761 --> 00:01:35,010
- Well-
- exactly.
43
00:01:35,011 --> 00:01:36,054
Thank you.
[clattering in distance]
44
00:01:36,055 --> 00:01:37,221
Wait, you hear that?
45
00:01:37,306 --> 00:01:39,598
[grunts]
freeze, put-
46
00:01:39,642 --> 00:01:40,933
My hands up?
47
00:01:40,935 --> 00:01:42,518
- Cut!
48
00:01:42,561 --> 00:01:44,061
Ok, take five, everyone.
49
00:01:44,105 --> 00:01:46,313
Well, well,
detective flute himself.
50
00:01:46,315 --> 00:01:48,190
I'm a big fan of your work.
51
00:01:48,191 --> 00:01:50,485
- Likewise-meaning,
I'm a big fan of my work,
52
00:01:50,486 --> 00:01:52,320
'cause I don't know
who the hell you are.
53
00:01:52,321 --> 00:01:54,947
- Bertram figg.
I'm making a limited series
54
00:01:54,949 --> 00:01:56,156
Based on the boner case,
55
00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:57,700
And you're the main character.
56
00:01:57,701 --> 00:02:00,452
- I'd watch the hell out of
that, even if it's on pluto.
57
00:02:00,496 --> 00:02:02,186
Oh, god, it's not on pluto,
is it?
58
00:02:02,206 --> 00:02:04,164
Wait, that guy's
supposed to be me?
59
00:02:04,208 --> 00:02:06,458
- You're right.
Wardrobe, makeup, hair!
60
00:02:06,585 --> 00:02:09,595
We've gotta make our flute much
fatter and dumpier, please.
61
00:02:10,214 --> 00:02:12,631
Getting closer.
- [grumbles]
62
00:02:14,426 --> 00:02:15,759
All: Fathers!
63
00:02:15,928 --> 00:02:16,978
All: Sons!
64
00:02:16,979 --> 00:02:18,221
All: Fathers!
- [sighs]
65
00:02:18,222 --> 00:02:20,092
- I wish my dad had time
to play with me.
66
00:02:20,182 --> 00:02:21,932
- Don't worry, stanners.
67
00:02:21,933 --> 00:02:23,852
That's what imaginary
bad influences are for.
68
00:02:23,853 --> 00:02:27,062
What do you say we go loosen
some bolts on the monkey bars?
69
00:02:27,064 --> 00:02:30,065
Maybe we could do
a little fecal graffiti.
70
00:02:30,067 --> 00:02:32,693
It's a beautiful day
in the park.
71
00:02:32,820 --> 00:02:33,902
We can do it all.
72
00:02:33,946 --> 00:02:35,487
All: [laughing]
son.
73
00:02:35,656 --> 00:02:38,365
All: [laughing]
dad.
74
00:02:38,367 --> 00:02:40,534
- You just sold the ip freely
to this guy
75
00:02:40,535 --> 00:02:42,328
Without consulting me
on casting?
76
00:02:42,329 --> 00:02:44,199
Did they even go
out to miles teller?
77
00:02:44,200 --> 00:02:45,498
He is the mustache guy
right now.
78
00:02:45,499 --> 00:02:47,250
- Sorry, flute,
chief needs the money
79
00:02:47,251 --> 00:02:48,543
For her latest
conspiracy theory.
80
00:02:48,544 --> 00:02:50,460
- Yeah, I've got my eye
on this tank.
81
00:02:50,588 --> 00:02:53,297
Oh, try to vaccinate me
in this bad boy.
82
00:02:53,340 --> 00:02:55,174
- But I haven't
solved the case yet.
83
00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:57,468
- You better, or that's
what the world will see.
84
00:02:57,469 --> 00:03:00,554
It's true crime, and I take
the "true" part seriously.
85
00:03:00,723 --> 00:03:02,014
That's my rule.
86
00:03:02,099 --> 00:03:05,017
That and never ask a grip
where he was on January 6.
87
00:03:05,060 --> 00:03:06,643
- This is so cool.
88
00:03:06,644 --> 00:03:08,313
So who's playing me
in the series?
89
00:03:08,314 --> 00:03:11,440
I get idris elba a lot.
[chuckles]
90
00:03:11,441 --> 00:03:14,194
- I didn't feel you were
a vital part of the narrative,
91
00:03:14,195 --> 00:03:16,320
So in the show,
flute works alone.
92
00:03:16,363 --> 00:03:18,447
- But you just said
you want it to be true.
93
00:03:18,574 --> 00:03:20,782
- Ah-buh-buh-buh,
just true enough,
94
00:03:20,783 --> 00:03:22,493
Which is why I
made your character
95
00:03:22,494 --> 00:03:25,245
Into a refurbished fitbit
that flute never wanted
96
00:03:25,331 --> 00:03:26,538
And hates.
97
00:03:26,858 --> 00:03:32,045
- You're the madness consultant
on this shoot, right?
98
00:03:32,046 --> 00:03:34,046
- Well, I wasn't
supposed to be,
99
00:03:34,173 --> 00:03:37,007
But the psychiatrist they hired
had to drop out
100
00:03:37,092 --> 00:03:40,093
Because he was mysteriously
poisoned.
101
00:03:40,095 --> 00:03:41,929
Such a pity.
102
00:03:41,972 --> 00:03:43,430
- Uh-huh, cool.
103
00:03:43,599 --> 00:03:46,058
So I was thinking
of this outfit for the killer.
104
00:03:46,185 --> 00:03:47,476
- Oh, god, no.
105
00:03:47,477 --> 00:03:50,146
He's a pathological,
clinically disturbed maniac
106
00:03:50,147 --> 00:03:53,857
With a penchant for
skeleto-zoological homicide,
107
00:03:53,859 --> 00:03:55,359
Not a dork.
108
00:03:55,361 --> 00:03:58,362
Mmm, this looks
benignly ethnic.
109
00:03:58,530 --> 00:04:00,364
- It's a taquito.
110
00:04:02,701 --> 00:04:05,202
- Arleen, I have
always believed cruelty
111
00:04:05,246 --> 00:04:07,579
Was humanity's greatest gift
to itself,
112
00:04:07,665 --> 00:04:11,041
But now I know
that it is
113
00:04:11,085 --> 00:04:13,210
Taquitos!
114
00:04:13,212 --> 00:04:16,380
[gentle flute music]
115
00:04:16,423 --> 00:04:17,756
♪
116
00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:19,508
- Ah! Home invasion!
117
00:04:21,428 --> 00:04:23,929
- It's ok, flute, he's
the actor from the tv show.
118
00:04:24,056 --> 00:04:25,196
- Kip deegan, pleasure.
119
00:04:25,197 --> 00:04:27,183
- Displeasure.
Why are you in my house?
120
00:04:27,184 --> 00:04:28,274
- My house.
- Her house.
121
00:04:28,275 --> 00:04:29,310
- It doesn't matter
whose house it is.
122
00:04:29,311 --> 00:04:30,941
- I just thought
I'd observe you
123
00:04:30,980 --> 00:04:32,187
In your everyday life.
124
00:04:32,188 --> 00:04:34,524
See, I'm trained in the
jeremy strong school of acting,
125
00:04:34,525 --> 00:04:36,484
Where you immerse yourself
in the role
126
00:04:36,485 --> 00:04:38,860
In a way
that's incredibly irritating
127
00:04:38,861 --> 00:04:40,029
To everyone around you.
128
00:04:40,030 --> 00:04:41,196
- "flute's ex-wife"?
129
00:04:41,197 --> 00:04:42,532
That's my character's name?
130
00:04:42,533 --> 00:04:44,574
- Yeah, they should change it
to hank.
131
00:04:44,618 --> 00:04:47,160
- Being your ex-wife is not
even in the top three
132
00:04:47,161 --> 00:04:48,913
Most interesting things
about me.
133
00:04:48,914 --> 00:04:50,289
One, I was raised by bears.
134
00:04:50,332 --> 00:04:52,040
Two, I'm great at parkour-
135
00:04:52,041 --> 00:04:53,793
Probably because
of all the climbing I did
136
00:04:53,794 --> 00:04:55,484
While I was
being raised by bears.
137
00:04:55,546 --> 00:04:57,254
And six, I'm not
great at numbers
138
00:04:57,298 --> 00:05:01,466
Because I was homeschooled
by a bunch of bears.
139
00:05:02,928 --> 00:05:04,511
Ugh, I have to go to work.
140
00:05:04,555 --> 00:05:06,930
[growling, panting]
141
00:05:06,932 --> 00:05:08,765
[phone chimes]
142
00:05:08,766 --> 00:05:10,351
- Damn it,
they found another body.
143
00:05:10,352 --> 00:05:12,936
Boner alert.
- Boner alert.
144
00:05:12,938 --> 00:05:14,813
- No, do less.
145
00:05:14,898 --> 00:05:16,064
Throw the boner away.
146
00:05:16,191 --> 00:05:18,442
- Bonah aluht.
Booner aloyt.
147
00:05:18,485 --> 00:05:20,193
- No, still too much.
- Baner alart.
148
00:05:20,321 --> 00:05:21,831
- Is that southern?
I speak in...
149
00:05:21,832 --> 00:05:23,865
- Boner alert.
- Midland american english.
150
00:05:23,866 --> 00:05:25,157
Eh, forget it.
151
00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:26,451
[in english accent]
just try to stay out of me way.
152
00:05:26,452 --> 00:05:28,452
[groans]
now you're in my head.
153
00:05:29,663 --> 00:05:32,456
- Hey, hey, hey,
you're sounding great, man.
154
00:05:32,458 --> 00:05:35,250
Uh, you may wanna explore
the space a little more.
155
00:05:35,336 --> 00:05:38,503
- Thanks, jeremy.
- Please, call me table.
156
00:05:42,384 --> 00:05:43,434
[brakes screech]
157
00:05:43,435 --> 00:05:44,969
- I wiped down those shelves
for you, bertram.
158
00:05:44,970 --> 00:05:46,179
- Thanks, harv, much better.
159
00:05:46,180 --> 00:05:47,930
I was seeing a lot
of fingerprints.
160
00:05:47,931 --> 00:05:49,223
- Wait, he wiped the prints?
161
00:05:49,224 --> 00:05:50,599
I need those to be the hero.
162
00:05:50,601 --> 00:05:53,060
Fingerprints are
the faces of the fingers.
163
00:05:53,061 --> 00:05:54,312
And nails are like the skulls.
164
00:05:54,313 --> 00:05:55,605
I think this knuckle
is the butt.
165
00:05:55,606 --> 00:05:57,899
And this one-wait,
why are there three bodies?
166
00:05:57,900 --> 00:06:00,070
- Oh, they hired me
as the corpse wrangler,
167
00:06:00,235 --> 00:06:02,319
So I'm just showing
them some options.
168
00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:04,030
- I scanned
and cross-referenced
169
00:06:04,031 --> 00:06:05,291
The murder weapon, flute.
170
00:06:05,324 --> 00:06:07,074
- He's not flute.
I'm flute.
171
00:06:07,076 --> 00:06:09,493
- Wow, it's like
I'm looking in a mirror.
172
00:06:09,494 --> 00:06:11,746
But you're in front of it,
and I'm off to the side
173
00:06:11,747 --> 00:06:13,121
Going, "wow."
174
00:06:13,123 --> 00:06:15,165
Anyway, it's a rabbit bone.
175
00:06:15,209 --> 00:06:17,667
- Huh, a rabbit bone.
176
00:06:17,795 --> 00:06:19,065
[echoing]
a rabbit bone.
177
00:06:19,171 --> 00:06:22,297
A rabbit bone.
A rabbit bone.
178
00:06:22,383 --> 00:06:23,799
[crunch]
179
00:06:23,926 --> 00:06:25,384
Missing a bone, doc?
180
00:06:25,511 --> 00:06:27,141
- Nah, I don't
know what you're-
181
00:06:27,142 --> 00:06:28,429
- Now you are.
- [laughs]
182
00:06:28,430 --> 00:06:31,264
That's all, fol-
[gurgling]
183
00:06:31,265 --> 00:06:33,184
- Whoa, back when
I was watching cartoons,
184
00:06:33,185 --> 00:06:35,769
Violence never
had consequences.
185
00:06:35,771 --> 00:06:37,354
Not a match.
186
00:06:37,439 --> 00:06:39,731
Hmm, how about you,
silly rabbit?
187
00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:40,899
You up to some trix?
188
00:06:41,026 --> 00:06:42,192
- [yelps]
189
00:06:42,193 --> 00:06:43,236
- Are you a cereal
serial killer?
190
00:06:43,237 --> 00:06:45,028
- I only steal cereal, I swear!
191
00:06:45,030 --> 00:06:46,863
I can't catch a body,
I have priors!
192
00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:49,691
Ah, ah!
[screams]
193
00:06:49,692 --> 00:06:52,161
- Nope, that's what you get
for changing the flavor.
194
00:06:52,162 --> 00:06:53,912
You taste like paint now.
195
00:06:53,914 --> 00:06:57,374
Aha, latin trap
and reggaeton star bad bunny.
196
00:06:58,419 --> 00:07:00,229
- Hey, sorry,
you're not on the list.
197
00:07:00,254 --> 00:07:02,087
- Seriously?
I'm marvin flute.
198
00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:03,923
Uh, maybe I put it
under one of my aliases.
199
00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:05,048
Marvin flame?
200
00:07:05,134 --> 00:07:06,716
Fluteus maximus?
201
00:07:06,717 --> 00:07:08,052
Mark milkshack, sour shoes,
202
00:07:08,053 --> 00:07:10,170
Former surgeon general
c. Everett koop.
203
00:07:10,171 --> 00:07:12,265
Maybe martin flute?
People always mess that up.
204
00:07:12,266 --> 00:07:14,016
They even misspelled it
on my birth certificate.
205
00:07:14,017 --> 00:07:15,434
Wait, is that my name?
206
00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:17,353
- It's ok, flute,
I talked to bad bunny.
207
00:07:17,354 --> 00:07:20,480
He says you should check
that taxidermy shop downtown.
208
00:07:20,566 --> 00:07:22,816
- Great idea,
and we're in my crime mind,
209
00:07:22,817 --> 00:07:23,860
So it was my great idea.
210
00:07:23,861 --> 00:07:25,527
Ha!
211
00:07:25,902 --> 00:07:28,656
- I'll meet you there, flute.
212
00:07:28,657 --> 00:07:31,616
I need to stop here
and cool myself down for a bit.
213
00:07:31,660 --> 00:07:35,620
- Yep, just one of many
very visual things I can do.
214
00:07:35,747 --> 00:07:37,414
- Whoa, amazing.
215
00:07:37,458 --> 00:07:40,158
- Yeah, I guess to viewers
it probably would be.
216
00:07:40,159 --> 00:07:41,127
- No-what?
217
00:07:41,128 --> 00:07:43,545
Shut up.
I'm talking about him!
218
00:07:44,298 --> 00:07:47,174
He's got it.
Who is he?
219
00:07:47,176 --> 00:07:49,926
- [sighs]
that's lieutenant kang.
220
00:07:49,928 --> 00:07:51,136
- Kang, kang.
221
00:07:51,180 --> 00:07:53,430
That's the sound
of a star bell ringing.
222
00:07:53,432 --> 00:07:55,432
- I got a bell
I wish he'd ring.
223
00:07:55,559 --> 00:07:56,808
Ding ding.
224
00:07:57,060 --> 00:08:00,896
- You, I'm writing you into
the show, playing yourself.
225
00:08:00,898 --> 00:08:02,147
- Ok.
226
00:08:02,274 --> 00:08:04,691
- I'll start making
the changes immediately.
227
00:08:04,735 --> 00:08:05,859
Do you have a pen?
228
00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:07,986
[arm whirring]
229
00:08:10,741 --> 00:08:12,574
- No, I do not.
230
00:08:12,701 --> 00:08:14,159
[clicks pen]
231
00:08:14,203 --> 00:08:16,870
[slurps]
- [grumbles]
232
00:08:16,997 --> 00:08:19,164
- Come on, stanny, walk it off.
233
00:08:19,166 --> 00:08:21,374
It was just a little
parental abandonment.
234
00:08:21,418 --> 00:08:23,793
- Yeah, I'm not
really in the mood.
235
00:08:23,921 --> 00:08:26,004
Oh, hey, hey, dad.
236
00:08:26,131 --> 00:08:29,090
Oh, sorry,
I thought you were my dad.
237
00:08:29,134 --> 00:08:30,258
- You're flute's son.
238
00:08:30,259 --> 00:08:31,594
I'm playing your dad
in the show.
239
00:08:31,595 --> 00:08:33,137
Can I ask what
your relationship is like?
240
00:08:33,138 --> 00:08:34,429
I need to become him.
241
00:08:34,431 --> 00:08:37,307
- Oh, well, we hang
out all the time.
242
00:08:37,351 --> 00:08:39,976
- What?
Oh, my god, stanjamin!
243
00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:41,686
You are so bad!
244
00:08:41,688 --> 00:08:44,356
- I guess if you really wanna
know what it's like,
245
00:08:44,358 --> 00:08:46,733
Maybe you and I could
play catch sometime?
246
00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:49,236
- Yes!
Let's go play catch right now.
247
00:08:49,363 --> 00:08:52,322
- Really? I mean, sure,
if it helps you.
248
00:08:52,324 --> 00:08:55,158
- Nice, no one has ever
been disappointed
249
00:08:55,159 --> 00:08:56,869
By making an actor
their role model.
250
00:08:56,870 --> 00:09:02,123
- Arleen, I happened to notice
this is the last taquito.
251
00:09:02,251 --> 00:09:03,458
So-
252
00:09:03,585 --> 00:09:05,418
- You ate the whole tray?
253
00:09:05,462 --> 00:09:08,421
[dramatic music]
254
00:09:08,422 --> 00:09:10,091
- Relinquish the taquito!
- No, you've had enough.
255
00:09:10,092 --> 00:09:11,092
- The salivation has begun.
256
00:09:11,093 --> 00:09:12,385
- You lost
your taquito privileges.
257
00:09:12,386 --> 00:09:14,637
- That is my crunchy num-num!
- You're cut off!
258
00:09:14,638 --> 00:09:15,762
No more!
259
00:09:15,847 --> 00:09:18,390
- You have won this round,
arleen.
260
00:09:18,433 --> 00:09:22,978
But there shall be
subsequent rounds.
261
00:09:26,066 --> 00:09:29,234
[ominous music]
262
00:09:29,278 --> 00:09:33,321
♪ ♪
263
00:09:33,490 --> 00:09:34,906
[bell rings]
264
00:09:34,908 --> 00:09:36,032
- Good evening.
265
00:09:36,034 --> 00:09:38,118
How can I help you?
266
00:09:38,120 --> 00:09:40,230
- Hi, I recently married
into a community
267
00:09:40,289 --> 00:09:42,219
Where the elders
throw bones in order
268
00:09:42,220 --> 00:09:43,291
To consult their ancestors.
269
00:09:43,292 --> 00:09:44,709
You know,
to predict the future,
270
00:09:44,710 --> 00:09:46,627
For crops, where to go for
brunch where the wait time
271
00:09:46,628 --> 00:09:48,296
Isn't longer than
the eat time-you get it.
272
00:09:48,297 --> 00:09:51,256
Anyway, I'm looking
to buy a rabbit bone.
273
00:09:51,257 --> 00:09:52,758
You probably don't
hear that a lot, huh?
274
00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:54,001
Unless you've
heard it recently.
275
00:09:54,002 --> 00:09:55,678
And if I could just get
the name of the person
276
00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:56,721
You heard it from recently?
277
00:09:56,722 --> 00:09:59,723
- Someone who'd
buy a rabbit bone?
278
00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:02,225
Let me think.
279
00:10:02,394 --> 00:10:03,476
Ah!
280
00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:06,438
[thrilling music]
281
00:10:06,565 --> 00:10:11,026
♪ ♪
282
00:10:11,028 --> 00:10:13,361
- Ugh, skunk!
Two ks!
283
00:10:13,488 --> 00:10:15,405
So masculine!
284
00:10:18,910 --> 00:10:20,327
Move!
I need to-
285
00:10:22,831 --> 00:10:25,373
Damn it.
You made me lose my boner.
286
00:10:25,374 --> 00:10:27,835
All right, bertram,
your limited streaming series
287
00:10:27,836 --> 00:10:30,837
Is seriously streaming
over the limit of my patience.
288
00:10:30,922 --> 00:10:31,972
I almost had him.
289
00:10:31,973 --> 00:10:33,799
- Sorry, but I told
them to block you.
290
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:36,384
I had to, you're just too
good and handsome at this.
291
00:10:36,428 --> 00:10:38,637
- I'm getting
less angry at you, go on.
292
00:10:38,680 --> 00:10:42,307
- You're going too fast for my
eight heavily padded episodes.
293
00:10:42,308 --> 00:10:44,101
I still need the audience
to fall in love
294
00:10:44,102 --> 00:10:45,436
With your character,
and to do that,
295
00:10:45,437 --> 00:10:47,812
They have to see someone
fall in love with you.
296
00:10:47,814 --> 00:10:49,147
I was thinking harmony.
297
00:10:49,191 --> 00:10:51,066
- Ugh, doesn't she have a kid?
298
00:10:51,067 --> 00:10:52,860
- People love
a second chance romance.
299
00:10:52,861 --> 00:10:54,194
Look at bennifer.
300
00:10:54,195 --> 00:10:56,697
- What would harmony and I's
couple name even be?
301
00:10:56,698 --> 00:10:59,074
Marvin flute?
302
00:10:59,201 --> 00:11:01,409
That actually
sounds pretty good.
303
00:11:01,410 --> 00:11:03,287
But it'll never work.
She's too mad at me.
304
00:11:03,288 --> 00:11:05,539
- Well, maybe I could help
smooth things over.
305
00:11:05,540 --> 00:11:07,625
We could give you two
a night out on the town
306
00:11:07,626 --> 00:11:08,958
With a little movie magic.
307
00:11:09,002 --> 00:11:10,126
- Deal.
308
00:11:10,127 --> 00:11:12,046
But once I get the girl,
I'm not gonna stop
309
00:11:12,047 --> 00:11:13,630
Until people call me
310
00:11:13,757 --> 00:11:15,340
The boner killer.
311
00:11:17,302 --> 00:11:20,553
- And then nine months later,
they have a new baby.
312
00:11:20,597 --> 00:11:22,764
- Wow, honestly,
I thought the nipples
313
00:11:22,765 --> 00:11:24,183
Would play a much bigger role.
314
00:11:24,184 --> 00:11:25,434
- So again, you and your dad
315
00:11:25,435 --> 00:11:27,245
Really do all of this
every Sunday?
316
00:11:27,312 --> 00:11:29,729
- Yep, then we get ice cream,
and we hug,
317
00:11:29,856 --> 00:11:31,189
And he teaches me to shave.
318
00:11:31,316 --> 00:11:33,441
I guess it's just our thing.
319
00:11:33,568 --> 00:11:35,860
- [crying]
you never take me for ice cream
320
00:11:35,904 --> 00:11:38,238
And hugs and teach me to shave!
321
00:11:38,239 --> 00:11:40,032
- Well, you can find
somewhere else to live,
322
00:11:40,033 --> 00:11:41,616
You spoiled son of a bitch!
323
00:11:45,163 --> 00:11:46,746
- Again, this isn't a date.
324
00:11:46,790 --> 00:11:48,957
I only came
because you got us
325
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:53,753
Into the hottest urban climbing
nightspot in grimsburg, ah!
326
00:11:53,754 --> 00:11:55,548
- I just wanted you
to see that it's not always
327
00:11:55,549 --> 00:11:56,599
The flute show.
328
00:11:56,633 --> 00:11:59,300
Marvin flute and guest
of marvin flute.
329
00:11:59,302 --> 00:12:01,970
- Your table is right that way.
330
00:12:03,432 --> 00:12:05,223
- Uh. Whoa!
331
00:12:05,225 --> 00:12:08,059
I probably should be
drinking less anyway!
332
00:12:08,061 --> 00:12:09,602
- Amateur.
333
00:12:09,646 --> 00:12:11,604
[growls]
334
00:12:11,732 --> 00:12:14,941
[panting]
335
00:12:15,068 --> 00:12:18,027
- Right behind you,
just like when we made stan.
336
00:12:18,071 --> 00:12:19,779
Uh, let's see, just gotta-
337
00:12:19,781 --> 00:12:22,449
Uh, no, nope.
Ah, ooh, ah, ow, uh, no.
338
00:12:22,450 --> 00:12:24,577
- We set up a wire rig
to help you up there.
339
00:12:24,578 --> 00:12:26,662
It's the same tech
they used to make nsync
340
00:12:26,663 --> 00:12:27,996
Look like they could dance.
341
00:12:27,998 --> 00:12:29,956
- So there were
strings attached.
342
00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:31,249
Whoo!
343
00:12:31,293 --> 00:12:32,959
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
[laughs]
344
00:12:33,003 --> 00:12:35,837
Oh, it's-
345
00:12:35,881 --> 00:12:37,964
Ohh, oh!
346
00:12:39,634 --> 00:12:41,926
[grunts]
347
00:12:41,928 --> 00:12:43,011
- You made it up.
348
00:12:43,013 --> 00:12:44,063
I'm impressed.
349
00:12:44,139 --> 00:12:45,889
- I've been working on my core.
350
00:12:45,932 --> 00:12:48,475
[tray clanging]
351
00:12:50,103 --> 00:12:51,978
[knocks softly]
352
00:12:56,067 --> 00:12:57,609
- Can I ask you something, sir?
353
00:12:57,611 --> 00:12:59,903
- Bertram said you have "it."
354
00:12:59,905 --> 00:13:02,238
What is it?
355
00:13:02,324 --> 00:13:03,448
- [sighs]
356
00:13:03,449 --> 00:13:05,409
Hollywood is built
on artifice, summers.
357
00:13:05,410 --> 00:13:08,161
It's all capped teeth,
surgically enhanced bodies,
358
00:13:08,288 --> 00:13:10,163
And smooth cgi perfection.
359
00:13:10,165 --> 00:13:11,790
But every once in a while,
360
00:13:11,791 --> 00:13:13,834
Someone comes along who cuts
through the illusion
361
00:13:13,835 --> 00:13:17,295
For one damn second,
a refreshing breeze of honesty
362
00:13:17,339 --> 00:13:20,215
In a stinking town
of deception.
363
00:13:20,383 --> 00:13:22,467
That is "it."
364
00:13:23,887 --> 00:13:25,970
Or maybe they just
needed an asian guy.
365
00:13:26,723 --> 00:13:29,015
- Ok, thanks.
366
00:13:30,060 --> 00:13:31,851
- Is he here?
- Does he smell good?
367
00:13:32,020 --> 00:13:33,728
- Can he sign my puffer jacket?
368
00:13:33,772 --> 00:13:34,822
[all screaming]
369
00:13:34,898 --> 00:13:36,481
- Oh, my god!
370
00:13:36,608 --> 00:13:38,066
- [groans]
371
00:13:39,444 --> 00:13:41,402
- Oh hey, kip,
I guess these are
372
00:13:41,403 --> 00:13:44,198
The new script pages for the
scene with flute and his son.
373
00:13:44,199 --> 00:13:46,991
It's kind of a lot,
but I could run lines with you.
374
00:13:47,035 --> 00:13:48,993
- Uh, fine.
Let's give it a shot.
375
00:13:48,994 --> 00:13:52,248
Hey, stan,
the murderer has struck again.
376
00:13:52,249 --> 00:13:54,332
But whatever happens,
I want you to know
377
00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:56,459
That I'm proud
to have you as my son.
378
00:13:56,503 --> 00:13:57,836
- I know that, dad.
379
00:13:57,963 --> 00:13:59,462
[gulps]
everyone does.
380
00:13:59,463 --> 00:14:01,465
- And also I don't think
your cape is weird.
381
00:14:01,466 --> 00:14:04,092
It's a part of you,
just like you're a part of me.
382
00:14:04,093 --> 00:14:06,095
And while I know
I don't say it enough,
383
00:14:06,096 --> 00:14:07,846
I'm always thinking it.
384
00:14:07,931 --> 00:14:09,848
I love you, stan.
385
00:14:10,016 --> 00:14:11,558
How was that?
- Good.
386
00:14:11,560 --> 00:14:14,477
But we should run it
a couple more times.
387
00:14:14,604 --> 00:14:16,187
- Kip, we need you on set.
388
00:14:16,231 --> 00:14:18,398
- So can we hang out
again later?
389
00:14:18,400 --> 00:14:20,316
- Sorry, but it's
show business,
390
00:14:20,318 --> 00:14:22,694
Not show affection
to some weird kid.
391
00:14:22,696 --> 00:14:25,321
- Ouch, can't argue
with his performance, though.
392
00:14:25,322 --> 00:14:27,032
The way he took a whiz
all over your heart,
393
00:14:27,033 --> 00:14:30,118
I mean, he's got
your dad down cold.
394
00:14:30,161 --> 00:14:31,578
[acoustic guitar music]
395
00:14:31,580 --> 00:14:34,289
- And I gotta admit,
that was really fun.
396
00:14:34,332 --> 00:14:37,458
- Wait, are those salmon
in the fountain?
397
00:14:37,459 --> 00:14:38,878
How did those get there?
- Oh, do you mind?
398
00:14:38,879 --> 00:14:39,929
- Please.
399
00:14:39,963 --> 00:14:42,714
- [growling]
400
00:14:42,715 --> 00:14:43,883
- There she is.
401
00:14:43,884 --> 00:14:45,466
- [munching]
402
00:14:45,594 --> 00:14:47,260
Still got it.
- Yeah.
403
00:14:47,261 --> 00:14:49,597
I wanted you to have a night
that's all about you.
404
00:14:49,598 --> 00:14:51,264
I'm not calling the shots.
405
00:14:51,391 --> 00:14:53,391
Cue wind.
406
00:14:53,518 --> 00:14:55,727
- Ooh.
- Oh, are you cold?
407
00:14:55,896 --> 00:14:57,478
Here, take my coat.
408
00:14:58,189 --> 00:15:00,023
Cue the sweet older couple
409
00:15:00,024 --> 00:15:01,483
Who could be her and me
in the future,
410
00:15:01,484 --> 00:15:04,027
If only we could get past
the past.
411
00:15:04,029 --> 00:15:06,154
- Oh, how cute.
412
00:15:06,155 --> 00:15:07,281
You know,
they almost look like-
413
00:15:07,282 --> 00:15:09,032
Oh, never mind, it's silly.
414
00:15:09,034 --> 00:15:10,783
[music stops]
415
00:15:10,911 --> 00:15:13,369
- Ok, we're on the doorstep.
Cue the jumbo.
416
00:15:13,455 --> 00:15:16,623
- Why is there
a jumbotron in the park?
417
00:15:16,666 --> 00:15:17,957
- So weird.
418
00:15:17,959 --> 00:15:19,292
Kiss cam? What perverts.
419
00:15:19,293 --> 00:15:20,878
But I guess we don't wanna
get a ticket.
420
00:15:20,879 --> 00:15:23,421
- Wait, did you
set all of this up?
421
00:15:23,465 --> 00:15:25,256
- Well, I can't
take all the credit.
422
00:15:25,300 --> 00:15:27,170
Bertram and his team
were troopers,
423
00:15:27,260 --> 00:15:29,510
Executing my vision
on very short notice.
424
00:15:29,596 --> 00:15:31,304
- Oh! It wasn't about me.
425
00:15:31,306 --> 00:15:33,181
It was about you getting me.
426
00:15:33,224 --> 00:15:35,058
Yeah, the hero gets the girl.
427
00:15:35,185 --> 00:15:37,393
- I'm more of an anti-hero,
like aunt may.
428
00:15:37,437 --> 00:15:40,146
- I'm done being part
of the flute show.
429
00:15:40,273 --> 00:15:42,203
- Harmony, no,
it's not the flute show.
430
00:15:42,275 --> 00:15:43,733
[upbeat pop music playing]
431
00:15:43,860 --> 00:15:45,276
Kill the back together cam.
432
00:15:45,403 --> 00:15:47,570
Read the room.
- Don't worry, I got a plan.
433
00:15:47,614 --> 00:15:50,198
- No, being your muse
no longer amuses me.
434
00:15:50,199 --> 00:15:51,784
Ooh, that's pretty good.
You can use that.
435
00:15:51,785 --> 00:15:53,452
But that's it.
I'm done with your show.
436
00:15:53,453 --> 00:15:55,120
And if you don't like it,
you can kiss
437
00:15:55,121 --> 00:15:58,331
These silicone butt pads
I no longer need.
438
00:16:01,836 --> 00:16:04,671
[dramatic music]
439
00:16:06,174 --> 00:16:09,592
- Time to get the boner
under my belt.
440
00:16:10,303 --> 00:16:13,888
My god, it's the actor
who looks nothing like me.
441
00:16:14,015 --> 00:16:16,891
[eerie music]
442
00:16:17,018 --> 00:16:24,273
♪ ♪
443
00:16:26,778 --> 00:16:28,361
[grunts]
444
00:16:31,032 --> 00:16:32,240
[groans]
445
00:16:32,283 --> 00:16:36,327
Fade to black
'cause hollywood.
446
00:16:37,330 --> 00:16:39,122
Where am I?
447
00:16:39,207 --> 00:16:40,999
Who's that coming toward me?
448
00:16:41,042 --> 00:16:42,333
Oh, right, the killer.
449
00:16:42,334 --> 00:16:44,128
Well, I suppose
it's been a good life.
450
00:16:44,129 --> 00:16:46,546
I wish I'd danced more.
451
00:16:46,589 --> 00:16:49,173
You idiot, you're supposed
to cut me, not the rope.
452
00:16:49,174 --> 00:16:50,551
So tie me back up-
- no, look,
453
00:16:50,552 --> 00:16:52,428
I may have murdered
a bunch of people,
454
00:16:52,429 --> 00:16:53,971
But I wasn't the one
who trapped you.
455
00:16:53,972 --> 00:16:55,096
And I didn't murder
456
00:16:55,097 --> 00:16:56,849
That good-looking
british actor either.
457
00:16:56,850 --> 00:16:57,891
It was that director.
458
00:16:57,892 --> 00:16:59,267
- Bertram? Ridiculous.
459
00:16:59,394 --> 00:17:02,770
- Let me just ask, does this
sound like real bone to you?
460
00:17:02,897 --> 00:17:03,947
[dull clacking]
461
00:17:04,024 --> 00:17:06,899
[mysterious music]
462
00:17:06,943 --> 00:17:09,861
♪ ♪
463
00:17:09,904 --> 00:17:12,405
- Epoxy resin, like the kind
used by hollywood...
464
00:17:12,406 --> 00:17:14,199
- Hollywood prop-
- prop makers, I said it first.
465
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:15,576
Bertram got worried
I'd catch you too soon,
466
00:17:15,577 --> 00:17:17,619
So he sidelined you
and started to carry out
467
00:17:17,620 --> 00:17:18,995
The killings himself.
468
00:17:19,039 --> 00:17:20,872
That can't be union.
- Exactly.
469
00:17:20,999 --> 00:17:22,749
So we need
to get out of here fast.
470
00:17:22,751 --> 00:17:24,167
Now, I have a plan.
471
00:17:24,169 --> 00:17:25,739
- No,
here's how it's gonna go:
472
00:17:25,740 --> 00:17:27,421
You bang on the door,
and say you need a doctor.
473
00:17:27,422 --> 00:17:28,547
You popped one of your balls.
474
00:17:28,548 --> 00:17:29,715
It sounds big,
but it happens a lot.
475
00:17:29,716 --> 00:17:30,716
You sit down wrong,
476
00:17:30,717 --> 00:17:31,842
You catch an edge
on a bar stool,
477
00:17:31,843 --> 00:17:32,885
You're bent over
trying to cuff a perp
478
00:17:32,886 --> 00:17:34,261
And you accidentally,
I don't know,
479
00:17:34,262 --> 00:17:36,387
Back into a doorknob.
480
00:17:36,388 --> 00:17:38,599
Anyway, I will be standing
behind the door
481
00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:41,476
With two totally working,
perfectly intact testicles
482
00:17:41,603 --> 00:17:42,727
Ready to heroically-
483
00:17:42,728 --> 00:17:44,146
- Ok, then,
I guess we're just doing
484
00:17:44,147 --> 00:17:45,813
Whatever flute wants.
485
00:17:45,940 --> 00:17:48,024
- Hmm, maybe
harmony was right about me
486
00:17:48,068 --> 00:17:50,026
Always having to make it
about me.
487
00:17:50,027 --> 00:17:51,653
Whoa, I just said
"about me" twice
488
00:17:51,654 --> 00:17:52,738
In that sentence about me.
489
00:17:52,739 --> 00:17:54,364
Wow, a third one,
but that's like
490
00:17:54,365 --> 00:17:55,532
When you eat oreos
and no one is looking.
491
00:17:55,533 --> 00:17:56,533
It doesn't count, right?
492
00:17:56,534 --> 00:17:58,367
Let's try it your way.
493
00:17:58,368 --> 00:18:00,871
You were saying something
about blah, blah, blah?
494
00:18:00,872 --> 00:18:03,748
[church organ playing]
495
00:18:03,875 --> 00:18:06,375
♪ ♪
496
00:18:06,503 --> 00:18:08,836
- Uh, just making sure
you have enough.
497
00:18:09,005 --> 00:18:11,506
- Yes, these will
suffice for now.
498
00:18:11,508 --> 00:18:14,634
And I'm so happy to hear your
mother's doing all right.
499
00:18:14,636 --> 00:18:18,429
That gas leak in her condo
must have been quite alarming.
500
00:18:18,473 --> 00:18:21,766
I certainly hope
it doesn't happen again.
501
00:18:21,768 --> 00:18:23,601
Fingers crossed.
502
00:18:23,645 --> 00:18:26,312
♪ ♪
503
00:18:26,397 --> 00:18:29,398
- Kip deegan was many things-
an actor,
504
00:18:29,442 --> 00:18:32,110
A pretend detective,
a friend.
505
00:18:32,237 --> 00:18:35,363
I'll never forget
the times we shared.
506
00:18:37,867 --> 00:18:40,201
- Who the hell is this?
I'm his wife.
507
00:18:40,328 --> 00:18:42,318
And they said
I wasn't allowed to speak.
508
00:18:42,330 --> 00:18:45,873
- As you can see,
kip didn't just play my father,
509
00:18:45,875 --> 00:18:47,500
He was a father figure to me.
510
00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:50,253
He brought me into his life,
paid attention to me,
511
00:18:50,296 --> 00:18:53,381
Made me feel special,
and then disappeared.
512
00:18:53,508 --> 00:18:58,261
But maybe that's what all
dads do, at least to me.
513
00:18:58,263 --> 00:18:59,554
[all gasping]
514
00:18:59,555 --> 00:19:01,348
- And I've got some blocking
for you, mr. Director.
515
00:19:01,349 --> 00:19:03,382
Hands up.
516
00:19:03,476 --> 00:19:05,059
- Kip's alive!
517
00:19:05,061 --> 00:19:07,478
- No, this guy's
way more out of shape.
518
00:19:07,647 --> 00:19:08,697
[laughter]
519
00:19:08,698 --> 00:19:10,732
- All right, all right,
I'll put my hand up
520
00:19:10,733 --> 00:19:12,191
With a gun in it!
521
00:19:12,318 --> 00:19:14,777
- [gasps]
- yes, I killed him.
522
00:19:14,821 --> 00:19:16,237
But I meant to kill you.
523
00:19:16,238 --> 00:19:18,157
It would have given me
the shocking twist
524
00:19:18,158 --> 00:19:20,741
That my series needed
to get serious buzz,
525
00:19:20,860 --> 00:19:22,326
Maybe a "vulture" article.
526
00:19:22,328 --> 00:19:24,370
But this-
this is gonna be better.
527
00:19:24,414 --> 00:19:27,707
We'll get your death
in an even more dramatic way,
528
00:19:27,750 --> 00:19:29,750
An armed standoff.
529
00:19:29,794 --> 00:19:31,377
[crowd murmuring]
530
00:19:31,421 --> 00:19:33,713
- Ok, so, on the show,
there'll be a funeral
531
00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:35,256
For the actor from the show?
532
00:19:35,257 --> 00:19:37,217
- I mean, yeah, it's gonna
be layered, sort of like-
533
00:19:37,218 --> 00:19:38,467
I mean, not "inception."
534
00:19:38,544 --> 00:19:39,804
Did you see "inception"?
535
00:19:39,805 --> 00:19:42,139
A lot of people didn't get it.
I got it, personally.
536
00:19:42,140 --> 00:19:43,931
Hey, no more questions!
537
00:19:44,058 --> 00:19:46,225
Time to go ahead
with my shot list.
538
00:19:46,269 --> 00:19:48,144
And you are at the top.
539
00:19:48,145 --> 00:19:49,688
- Damn it, this wasn't
how I saw this going.
540
00:19:49,689 --> 00:19:52,899
But luckily, I'm not
the only one with a plan.
541
00:19:52,901 --> 00:19:54,525
- [roars]
542
00:19:56,154 --> 00:19:58,613
[machine humming]
543
00:19:58,656 --> 00:20:01,032
- Not bad for a fitbit, huh?
544
00:20:03,161 --> 00:20:05,703
- You saved us.
[sighs]
545
00:20:05,830 --> 00:20:08,164
- [groans]
546
00:20:08,165 --> 00:20:10,417
- I guess you were right,
it's not the flute show.
547
00:20:10,418 --> 00:20:12,293
- Oh, good to hear
you finally say it.
548
00:20:12,294 --> 00:20:14,546
- Yeah, it's more like
the flute and friends show.
549
00:20:14,547 --> 00:20:17,506
I'm still the main draw,
but you guys help some too.
550
00:20:17,507 --> 00:20:19,426
I mean, if this maniac
was able to put aside
551
00:20:19,427 --> 00:20:21,720
His homicidal tendencies
for the sake of teamwork-
552
00:20:21,721 --> 00:20:22,803
- [screams]
- ahh!
553
00:20:22,931 --> 00:20:24,472
- Oh, boy, never mind.
554
00:20:24,474 --> 00:20:26,766
This boner won't quit.
555
00:20:26,893 --> 00:20:29,936
[light music]
556
00:20:30,063 --> 00:20:31,813
- I heard your speech
in the coffin.
557
00:20:31,856 --> 00:20:33,105
- Oh, you did?
558
00:20:33,149 --> 00:20:35,316
- Seems like that kip guy
was kind of a jerk.
559
00:20:35,360 --> 00:20:38,361
- Yeah, and he didn't even
look or sound like you.
560
00:20:38,362 --> 00:20:40,447
- Thank you.
That's what I've been saying.
561
00:20:40,448 --> 00:20:43,033
Oh, boy, someone just earned
himself some ice cream.
562
00:20:43,034 --> 00:20:44,325
- Really?
563
00:20:44,327 --> 00:20:46,202
He was a pretty bad actor too.
564
00:20:46,246 --> 00:20:47,328
- I mean, terrible.
565
00:20:47,330 --> 00:20:49,413
Just an all-around
piece of crap.
566
00:20:49,457 --> 00:20:51,832
- That's my dead husband
you're talking about.
567
00:20:51,833 --> 00:20:54,253
- Well, I hope his performance
was better in bed.
568
00:20:54,254 --> 00:20:55,336
Up top.
569
00:20:55,380 --> 00:20:56,754
[both laugh]
570
00:21:00,426 --> 00:21:01,566
Narrator: This summer...
571
00:21:01,594 --> 00:21:03,704
[siren wailing]
- please, I'm a minister.
572
00:21:03,763 --> 00:21:05,888
- Then you better
start praying.
573
00:21:06,015 --> 00:21:09,016
- Power grid disabled.
574
00:21:09,018 --> 00:21:11,018
- This city's out of control.
575
00:21:11,019 --> 00:21:12,771
Someone's got to do
something about it.
576
00:21:12,772 --> 00:21:15,147
[dramatic music]
577
00:21:15,191 --> 00:21:18,359
Narrator: Only one man
can stop the madness.
578
00:21:18,528 --> 00:21:19,735
♪ ♪
579
00:21:19,862 --> 00:21:21,821
[tires screeching]
580
00:21:21,864 --> 00:21:24,365
- That flight's been canceled.
581
00:21:26,911 --> 00:21:28,703
- [squealing]
582
00:21:28,830 --> 00:21:31,247
- He's got it.
583
00:21:35,044 --> 00:21:36,627
- Bento.
[all cheering]
584
00:21:36,677 --> 00:21:41,227
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