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1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:04,220
[THE PARTRIDGE FAMILY'S
"COME ON GET HAPPY" PLAYING]
2
00:00:08,170 --> 00:00:12,190
? Hello, world, hear the song
That we're singing ?
3
00:00:12,390 --> 00:00:15,000
? Come on, get happy ?
4
00:00:17,030 --> 00:00:21,050
? A whole lot of lovin'
Is what we'll be bringing ?
5
00:00:21,250 --> 00:00:23,150
? We'll make you happy ?
6
00:00:25,170 --> 00:00:27,960
? We had a dream
We'd go traveling together ?
7
00:00:28,160 --> 00:00:29,900
? We'd spread a little love ?
8
00:00:30,100 --> 00:00:31,910
? And then we'll keep
Movin' on ?
9
00:00:32,110 --> 00:00:35,170
? Something always happens
Whenever we're together ?
10
00:00:35,370 --> 00:00:39,050
? We get a happy feeling
When we're singing a song ?
11
00:00:39,250 --> 00:00:43,000
? Traveling along there's
A song that we're singing ?
12
00:00:43,200 --> 00:00:45,130
? Come on, get happy ?
13
00:00:47,160 --> 00:00:51,140
? A whole lot of lovin'
Is what we'll be bringing ?
14
00:00:51,340 --> 00:00:54,100
? We'll make you happy ?
15
00:00:54,300 --> 00:00:58,130
? We'll make you happy ?
16
00:00:58,330 --> 00:01:02,020
? We'll make you happy ?
17
00:01:04,060 --> 00:01:06,000
[???]
18
00:01:13,050 --> 00:01:15,060
[MUSIC AND GUNSHOTS ON TV]
19
00:01:16,090 --> 00:01:17,200
Who left this mess
in here?
20
00:01:21,140 --> 00:01:24,070
Who made that mess
in the kitchen?
21
00:01:26,140 --> 00:01:27,910
Did you want
something, Mom?
22
00:01:28,110 --> 00:01:31,000
No, I always talk to myself.
Who made that mess?
23
00:01:31,200 --> 00:01:32,820
Well, no one's perfect.
24
00:01:33,020 --> 00:01:34,180
Mom, I know
I left my leotards
25
00:01:34,380 --> 00:01:36,160
hanging in the bathroom,
but they're not dry yet.
26
00:01:36,360 --> 00:01:39,080
Are there any more confessions
before I narrow it down
27
00:01:39,280 --> 00:01:41,000
to an apple core,
a banana peel
28
00:01:41,200 --> 00:01:44,030
and the rest of that stuff
left on the kitchen sink?
29
00:01:44,230 --> 00:01:46,910
Oh, that mess.
That mess.
30
00:01:47,110 --> 00:01:50,800
You left the refrigerator door
open, the milk was left out,
31
00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:53,120
and you know the garbage goes
in the garbage disposal.
32
00:01:53,320 --> 00:01:55,930
We're sorry.
Sorry isn't enough, Tracy.
33
00:01:56,130 --> 00:01:57,870
I've told you this
time after time,
34
00:01:58,070 --> 00:02:00,180
and it just seems to go in
one ear and out the other.
35
00:02:00,380 --> 00:02:04,000
CHRIS: We'll clean it up.
Right after the movie.
36
00:02:04,200 --> 00:02:05,990
No more movie.
It's bedtime.
37
00:02:06,190 --> 00:02:08,850
In fact, it's past
your bedtime. Let's go.
38
00:02:09,050 --> 00:02:12,060
You're gonna make us go to bed
in the middle of the ambush?
39
00:02:12,260 --> 00:02:14,210
After you clean up
the mess.
40
00:02:14,410 --> 00:02:16,960
No fair.
They get to stay up.
41
00:02:17,160 --> 00:02:20,220
SHIRLEY: They're older.
We didn't ask to be born last.
42
00:02:20,420 --> 00:02:22,880
Golly.
We ought to run away.
43
00:02:23,080 --> 00:02:26,080
After you clean up the mess.
Then we'll run away.
44
00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:27,900
Fine.
How about waiting
45
00:02:28,100 --> 00:02:30,130
until morning after you've
had a good night's sleep?
46
00:02:30,330 --> 00:02:33,130
[???]
47
00:02:36,110 --> 00:02:38,110
Now we can watch
the sexy movie.
48
00:02:38,310 --> 00:02:39,950
[???]
49
00:02:40,150 --> 00:02:42,160
She's not even worried.
50
00:02:42,360 --> 00:02:46,030
Let's really run away.
Okay, let's do it.
51
00:02:46,230 --> 00:02:48,030
[???]
52
00:02:56,090 --> 00:02:58,140
Boy, it's dark
out there.
53
00:02:58,340 --> 00:03:00,810
I have a better plan:
54
00:03:01,010 --> 00:03:02,030
Let's run away
in the morning
55
00:03:02,230 --> 00:03:04,160
after we've had
a good night's sleep.
56
00:03:04,360 --> 00:03:06,110
[???]
57
00:03:09,230 --> 00:03:12,210
[???]
58
00:03:20,060 --> 00:03:22,060
All right, everybody,
let's get started.
59
00:03:22,260 --> 00:03:25,080
One, two,
one, two, three.
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00:03:33,120 --> 00:03:36,200
[SINGING
"I WOULD HAVE LOVED YOU"]
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00:05:37,030 --> 00:05:38,850
We sounded pretty good.
62
00:05:39,050 --> 00:05:40,190
Yeah, I demand a raise,
63
00:05:40,390 --> 00:05:43,050
or I'm gonna
join the King Family.
64
00:05:43,250 --> 00:05:45,810
Are we done?
Yes, I guess so.
65
00:05:46,010 --> 00:05:48,150
Then, may we be excused?
We're gonna run away now.
66
00:05:49,210 --> 00:05:51,070
Bye.
67
00:05:54,060 --> 00:05:55,110
See you.
68
00:05:55,310 --> 00:05:56,800
Mom.
69
00:05:57,000 --> 00:05:58,160
Kids, wait a minute.
70
00:05:59,190 --> 00:06:00,940
If you're gonna run away,
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00:06:01,140 --> 00:06:02,960
you'll have to take
more than that.
72
00:06:03,160 --> 00:06:04,970
I mean, you'll need
a change of clothes.
73
00:06:05,170 --> 00:06:07,200
It'll be cold tonight.
You'll need your jackets.
74
00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:09,000
Oh, I didn't
think of that.
75
00:06:09,200 --> 00:06:11,200
Well, you have to think
of those things
76
00:06:11,400 --> 00:06:14,140
if you're running away.
You'll have to pack a suitcase.
77
00:06:14,340 --> 00:06:17,060
She's always
been right before.
78
00:06:17,260 --> 00:06:18,800
Yeah, besides,
79
00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:20,900
I forgot my baseball.
Come on, Tracy.
80
00:06:21,100 --> 00:06:24,180
What kind of advice was that?
You encouraged them to run away.
81
00:06:24,380 --> 00:06:26,010
No wonder
I feel so insecure.
82
00:06:26,210 --> 00:06:28,130
If you force
a child to stay at home
83
00:06:28,330 --> 00:06:31,000
it's only gonna make him
wanna run away more.
84
00:06:31,200 --> 00:06:33,000
There's nothing
to worry about.
85
00:06:33,200 --> 00:06:35,180
They're not going anywhere.
Well, they're packing.
86
00:06:35,380 --> 00:06:39,030
I'll tell you exactly
what's going to happen:
87
00:06:39,230 --> 00:06:42,870
They'll walk out of here,
go about halfway down the block,
88
00:06:43,070 --> 00:06:44,180
as far as Mrs. Monihan's.
89
00:06:44,380 --> 00:06:46,190
They'll stop in
and have some brownies.
90
00:06:46,390 --> 00:06:47,920
After they've had a few,
91
00:06:48,120 --> 00:06:50,110
they'll forget why
they're mad and come home.
92
00:06:50,310 --> 00:06:53,140
The whole process
takes about 45 minutes.
93
00:06:53,340 --> 00:06:54,850
How do you figure that?
94
00:06:55,050 --> 00:06:57,070
You guys certainly
have short memories.
95
00:06:57,270 --> 00:07:00,030
You two did the very same thing.
Oh, great.
96
00:07:00,230 --> 00:07:02,030
I thought I had you
worried to death.
97
00:07:02,230 --> 00:07:04,830
Well, I hope you know
what you're doing, Mom.
98
00:07:05,030 --> 00:07:07,180
Believe me, I do.
I'm gonna call Mrs. Monihan
99
00:07:07,380 --> 00:07:10,090
right now and tell her
to expect them.
100
00:07:10,290 --> 00:07:12,120
[???]
101
00:07:15,180 --> 00:07:18,910
Well, I see you're all packed.
Yeah.
102
00:07:19,110 --> 00:07:21,190
I guess this is goodbye then.
I guess so.
103
00:07:21,390 --> 00:07:23,030
Goodbye.
Bye.
104
00:07:23,230 --> 00:07:25,170
Bye, kids.
105
00:07:33,020 --> 00:07:34,080
Will you feed
my turtles?
106
00:07:36,120 --> 00:07:37,000
Sure.
107
00:07:37,200 --> 00:07:38,980
Bye-bye, Trace.
Bye.
108
00:07:39,180 --> 00:07:41,110
You want some sandwiches
to take along or something?
109
00:07:41,310 --> 00:07:44,050
No, thanks.
We'll get something.
110
00:07:44,250 --> 00:07:47,020
Yeah, maybe
some brownies. Bye.
111
00:07:47,220 --> 00:07:49,050
[???]
112
00:07:53,150 --> 00:07:54,850
Want me to follow them?
113
00:07:55,050 --> 00:07:57,190
Give them a head start,
then follow them.
114
00:08:04,180 --> 00:08:07,900
Mrs. Monihan, you better
break out the brownies.
115
00:08:08,100 --> 00:08:11,160
You should be able
to see them coming by now.
116
00:08:11,360 --> 00:08:13,030
You do? Good.
117
00:08:13,230 --> 00:08:16,200
No, Keith isn't
running away again.
118
00:08:16,400 --> 00:08:19,200
He's just
following them.
119
00:08:19,400 --> 00:08:21,040
[???]
120
00:08:24,100 --> 00:08:25,890
Maureen.
121
00:08:26,090 --> 00:08:29,160
Maureen, you know
I'd do anything for you,
122
00:08:29,360 --> 00:08:32,120
but I just can't do it
over the phone.
123
00:08:35,100 --> 00:08:38,880
Besides, it wouldn't sound
right without a guitar.
124
00:08:39,080 --> 00:08:42,210
Yeah, okay, look,
I can't talk right now.
125
00:08:42,410 --> 00:08:45,170
That I believe.
He can barely spell.
126
00:08:45,370 --> 00:08:47,030
Keith, are you
still on that phone?
127
00:08:47,230 --> 00:08:49,200
I'm expecting
a call from Mrs. Monihan.
128
00:08:49,400 --> 00:08:52,070
Bye.
Are you worried?
129
00:08:52,270 --> 00:08:54,850
Why should I worry?
130
00:08:55,050 --> 00:08:58,170
Keith, you did see them go
to Mrs. Monihan's, didn't you?
131
00:08:58,370 --> 00:09:01,950
Sure did. You called it
right down the line.
132
00:09:02,150 --> 00:09:04,180
They've been gone an hour.
133
00:09:04,380 --> 00:09:06,200
Well, you are worried.
134
00:09:06,400 --> 00:09:08,030
No, it's just that--
135
00:09:08,230 --> 00:09:10,890
Well, you came home
in 47 minutes.
136
00:09:11,090 --> 00:09:13,020
And Danny
came home in 52.
137
00:09:13,220 --> 00:09:14,880
You can't go
by that, Mom.
138
00:09:15,080 --> 00:09:17,020
Kids today lead
a different lifestyle.
139
00:09:17,220 --> 00:09:18,860
Mom, why don't you
just call them
140
00:09:19,060 --> 00:09:20,140
and tell them
to come home?
141
00:09:20,340 --> 00:09:23,810
Oh, Laurie, you missed
the whole point.
142
00:09:24,010 --> 00:09:27,940
They-- They have to wanna
come home on their own.
143
00:09:28,140 --> 00:09:31,070
I think I'll call Mrs. Monihan
about that bake sale.
144
00:09:31,270 --> 00:09:33,860
Mom, that was
last week.
145
00:09:34,060 --> 00:09:36,210
Then I'll call her
about the kids.
146
00:09:36,410 --> 00:09:39,100
You big phony.
Out.
147
00:09:47,150 --> 00:09:49,860
Hello, Mrs. Monihan,
this is Shirley.
148
00:09:50,060 --> 00:09:52,180
Please don't tell Chris
and Tracy I'm calling
149
00:09:52,380 --> 00:09:55,070
but I think it's
about time they--
150
00:09:55,270 --> 00:09:57,890
They did?
Why didn't you call me?
151
00:09:58,090 --> 00:10:00,120
The line was busy.
What's wrong?
152
00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:03,080
No, no, don't worry.
153
00:10:03,280 --> 00:10:05,080
I'll-- I'll
let you know.
154
00:10:05,280 --> 00:10:07,890
Yes, thank you.
155
00:10:08,090 --> 00:10:10,120
They left 20 minutes ago.
KEITH: Where did they go?
156
00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:11,180
She thought
they came home.
157
00:10:11,380 --> 00:10:12,940
They must be
in the neighborhood.
158
00:10:13,140 --> 00:10:15,230
I'll go check the tree house.
LAURIE: I'll check the park.
159
00:10:15,430 --> 00:10:18,050
I'll check
the garbage cans.
160
00:10:20,150 --> 00:10:21,890
Well, it's a great
hiding place.
161
00:10:22,090 --> 00:10:24,180
You never found me
when I hid in the garbage cans.
162
00:10:24,380 --> 00:10:27,200
[PHONE RINGING]
163
00:10:28,230 --> 00:10:29,840
Hello?
164
00:10:30,040 --> 00:10:31,870
Hello, Max?
How are you?
165
00:10:32,070 --> 00:10:35,000
Shirley, I'm not supposed
to tell you this,
166
00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:37,060
but Chris
and Tracy are here,
167
00:10:37,260 --> 00:10:40,190
and a cab driver
that wants $6.45.
168
00:10:40,390 --> 00:10:42,880
They're at Reuben's.
169
00:10:43,080 --> 00:10:44,230
Are they all right?
170
00:10:44,430 --> 00:10:47,090
They're doing
better than I am.
171
00:10:51,200 --> 00:10:53,210
So don't worry
about a thing, Max.
172
00:10:53,410 --> 00:10:55,180
Just tell me what to do.
173
00:10:55,380 --> 00:10:58,000
Heads up,
Mr. Kincaid.
174
00:10:59,210 --> 00:11:01,220
And you'd better
make it quick.
175
00:11:01,420 --> 00:11:03,060
[???]
176
00:11:07,060 --> 00:11:08,180
[???]
177
00:11:12,170 --> 00:11:13,840
Is your mother here?
178
00:11:14,040 --> 00:11:16,070
Where's Chris and Tracy?
At my place.
179
00:11:16,270 --> 00:11:19,110
You left them alone?
No, I left them at the pool.
180
00:11:19,310 --> 00:11:23,860
Four beautiful girls: Babs
and Carol and Tina and Alice.
181
00:11:24,060 --> 00:11:26,030
It sounds
like an X-rated movie.
182
00:11:29,100 --> 00:11:30,860
Where are the children?
183
00:11:31,060 --> 00:11:32,840
He left them
with Babs and Carol
184
00:11:33,040 --> 00:11:36,000
and Tina and Alice.
SHIRLEY: Are they all right?
185
00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:39,130
Hell, I should be doing so well.
Now, what is going on?
186
00:11:39,330 --> 00:11:42,090
I punished them
for making a mess.
187
00:11:42,290 --> 00:11:43,810
Well, they ran away.
188
00:11:44,010 --> 00:11:45,810
Well, they sure left
well-prepared.
189
00:11:46,010 --> 00:11:48,130
I lifted their suitcases
and nearly threw my back out.
190
00:11:48,330 --> 00:11:51,200
Mom, don't you think
we ought to go and get them?
191
00:11:51,400 --> 00:11:53,030
Not yet.
192
00:11:53,230 --> 00:11:57,000
Honey, I want them
to come home on their own.
193
00:11:58,080 --> 00:11:59,900
Reuben,
194
00:12:00,100 --> 00:12:03,180
would you mind if they stayed
with you for a couple of hours?
195
00:12:03,380 --> 00:12:06,190
Of course not,
but what good will that do?
196
00:12:06,390 --> 00:12:08,150
Well, maybe
you can show them
197
00:12:08,350 --> 00:12:10,130
the bad side
of living alone.
198
00:12:10,330 --> 00:12:11,830
Great idea, Mom.
199
00:12:12,030 --> 00:12:13,130
A couple hours
with Mr. Kincaid
200
00:12:13,330 --> 00:12:16,040
would drive anybody home.
201
00:12:16,240 --> 00:12:18,030
Danny,
202
00:12:20,030 --> 00:12:22,050
if you'd like to go
to the beach with me,
203
00:12:22,250 --> 00:12:24,180
I'll let you swim
in the riptide.
204
00:12:24,380 --> 00:12:26,150
Riptides are dangerous.
205
00:12:26,350 --> 00:12:29,060
Oh, who told you that?
206
00:12:29,260 --> 00:12:31,010
[???]
207
00:12:34,040 --> 00:12:35,210
[MUSIC PLAYING]
208
00:12:38,050 --> 00:12:40,150
We had a lot of fun
with the babysitters.
209
00:12:40,350 --> 00:12:41,820
Yeah, wonderful.
210
00:12:42,020 --> 00:12:44,810
Wish I could say
the same thing.
211
00:12:45,010 --> 00:12:48,200
Chris, we-- We have
to have a man-to-man--
212
00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:51,020
Man-- Talk-- Talk.
213
00:12:51,220 --> 00:12:52,880
Oh, excuse me.
214
00:12:53,080 --> 00:12:55,800
You know,
a bachelor doesn't have
215
00:12:56,000 --> 00:12:57,160
a mother
to take care of him.
216
00:12:57,360 --> 00:12:59,130
So he has to take care
of everything...
217
00:12:59,330 --> 00:13:01,860
[SNEEZES]
218
00:13:02,060 --> 00:13:04,080
...himself.
Do you have a cold?
219
00:13:04,280 --> 00:13:05,820
No.
220
00:13:06,020 --> 00:13:09,010
It's the darndest thing.
It feels like my allergy.
221
00:13:09,210 --> 00:13:11,070
Well, what are you
allergic to?
222
00:13:11,270 --> 00:13:13,160
Uh, certain kinds of dogs.
223
00:13:15,070 --> 00:13:16,200
What kind of dogs?
224
00:13:16,400 --> 00:13:18,840
Long-haired dogs.
225
00:13:19,040 --> 00:13:20,830
Sheepdogs are the worst,
226
00:13:21,030 --> 00:13:23,010
like the kind the people
next door have.
227
00:13:25,110 --> 00:13:27,820
Makes me sneeze
and break out in hives.
228
00:13:28,020 --> 00:13:31,130
Are hives like little red marks
all over your face?
229
00:13:31,330 --> 00:13:33,810
Well, yes.
230
00:13:34,010 --> 00:13:36,020
Guess what your neighbors
let me play with?
231
00:13:41,200 --> 00:13:42,970
[???]
232
00:13:43,170 --> 00:13:46,230
Tracy, will you hurry up
with your bath?
233
00:13:46,430 --> 00:13:51,050
I have to put some calamine
lotion on my hives.
234
00:13:51,250 --> 00:13:53,100
Tracy.
235
00:13:53,300 --> 00:13:54,880
[???]
236
00:13:55,080 --> 00:13:57,010
Tracy.
237
00:14:00,100 --> 00:14:01,230
Oh, Tracy.
238
00:14:01,430 --> 00:14:04,030
I only used this much.
239
00:14:05,210 --> 00:14:09,010
Well, stay here.
I'll-- I'll get a mop.
240
00:14:09,210 --> 00:14:09,870
Ah!
241
00:14:10,070 --> 00:14:12,020
Mr. Kincaid,
where did you go?
242
00:14:13,080 --> 00:14:14,880
[SNEEZING]
243
00:14:15,080 --> 00:14:17,140
God bless you.
244
00:14:17,340 --> 00:14:19,000
[???]
245
00:14:24,100 --> 00:14:25,810
What's that?
246
00:14:26,010 --> 00:14:28,230
It's the darndest thing
I've ever seen.
247
00:14:28,430 --> 00:14:30,850
It almost looks human.
248
00:14:31,050 --> 00:14:33,880
See, it has
ten fingers and ten toes.
249
00:14:34,080 --> 00:14:36,120
What's all
the rest of it?
250
00:14:36,320 --> 00:14:39,080
Well, that's what's
got me stumped.
251
00:14:43,040 --> 00:14:45,810
Okay, kids,
time for you to go to bed.
252
00:14:46,010 --> 00:14:47,900
Already?
I thought bachelors
253
00:14:48,100 --> 00:14:50,110
got to stay up
as long as they wanted to.
254
00:14:50,310 --> 00:14:53,030
Oh, now, you are
only apprentice bachelors.
255
00:14:53,230 --> 00:14:55,810
Now, bachelor-union rules
specifically state
256
00:14:56,010 --> 00:14:57,210
that apprentices
under the age of 10
257
00:14:57,410 --> 00:15:00,850
must to go bed
at 7:56 p.m.
258
00:15:01,050 --> 00:15:02,230
All right.
259
00:15:04,110 --> 00:15:05,220
Good night.
260
00:15:12,070 --> 00:15:13,950
[PHONE RINGS]
261
00:15:14,150 --> 00:15:17,040
Hello.
KINCAID: Shirley. Reuben.
262
00:15:17,240 --> 00:15:18,860
How are the kids?
Fine.
263
00:15:19,060 --> 00:15:21,090
Why don't you let them
spend the night here.
264
00:15:21,290 --> 00:15:23,010
I'm not doing anything.
265
00:15:23,210 --> 00:15:25,800
Sure.
It's very nice of you, but--
266
00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:27,850
I am not
doing it to be nice.
267
00:15:28,050 --> 00:15:29,190
I'm out for revenge.
268
00:15:29,390 --> 00:15:32,000
Believe me, tomorrow
they'll wanna come home.
269
00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:33,860
Are you sure?
Positive.
270
00:15:34,060 --> 00:15:34,910
[DOORBELL RINGING]
271
00:15:35,110 --> 00:15:37,060
There's my doorbell.
Talk to you later.
272
00:15:38,080 --> 00:15:41,060
Well, all right. Goodbye.
273
00:15:46,160 --> 00:15:48,070
Bonnie!
274
00:15:48,270 --> 00:15:50,030
[???]
275
00:15:50,230 --> 00:15:52,940
Bonnie Kleinschmitt,
what are you doing here?
276
00:15:53,140 --> 00:15:54,840
One of the other
stewardesses wanted
277
00:15:55,040 --> 00:15:56,910
to go to Seattle,
so we changed flights.
278
00:15:57,110 --> 00:15:59,180
Since I'm only going
to be in town for one night,
279
00:15:59,380 --> 00:16:01,230
naturally
I thought of you.
280
00:16:01,430 --> 00:16:03,200
Thanks.
281
00:16:05,030 --> 00:16:06,000
I, um...
282
00:16:06,200 --> 00:16:08,110
I brought some champagne
283
00:16:08,310 --> 00:16:11,010
for us to start
the evening with.
284
00:16:16,140 --> 00:16:18,230
We, uh...
We'd better not open that.
285
00:16:18,430 --> 00:16:21,110
The pop might wake up--
The neighbors.
286
00:16:21,310 --> 00:16:22,880
At 8:00?
287
00:16:23,080 --> 00:16:25,180
Why, I thought this was
a swinging singles' apartment.
288
00:16:25,380 --> 00:16:26,850
Right.
289
00:16:27,050 --> 00:16:29,890
Everyone is resting up
for the long night ahead.
290
00:16:30,090 --> 00:16:31,880
Why don't we watch
some television?
291
00:16:32,080 --> 00:16:33,230
I-- I think
Billy Graham's on.
292
00:16:33,430 --> 00:16:36,920
Reuben, if I wanted
to watch Billy Graham
293
00:16:37,120 --> 00:16:40,080
this would be
the last place I'd come to.
294
00:16:40,280 --> 00:16:41,970
Mr. Kincaid?
295
00:16:42,170 --> 00:16:44,850
Take a letter,
Miss Kleinschmitt.
296
00:16:45,050 --> 00:16:47,060
"I, Reuben Kincaid--"
Who are these kids?
297
00:16:47,260 --> 00:16:49,010
Ki-Kids?
298
00:16:49,210 --> 00:16:50,810
Oh.
299
00:16:51,010 --> 00:16:52,960
Uh, Bonnie,
300
00:16:53,160 --> 00:16:54,800
meet Chris and Tracy.
301
00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:56,020
Did you run away too?
302
00:16:56,220 --> 00:16:58,840
No, but I'm about to.
303
00:16:59,040 --> 00:17:02,120
Now, Bonnie, I am
only babysitting for a friend.
304
00:17:02,320 --> 00:17:04,100
They'll be gone
in an hour.
305
00:17:04,300 --> 00:17:07,150
I promise. Now--
Wait for me, please?
306
00:17:07,350 --> 00:17:10,120
Just one hour?
Well...
307
00:17:12,010 --> 00:17:13,190
You don't wanna go
through your whole life
308
00:17:13,390 --> 00:17:15,020
with the name
Kleinschmitt, do you?
309
00:17:15,220 --> 00:17:17,010
I'll wait.
310
00:17:21,060 --> 00:17:21,990
Mr. Kincaid--
311
00:17:22,190 --> 00:17:24,950
Kids, how would
you like to play a game?
312
00:17:25,150 --> 00:17:27,230
I don't think so.
Good, it's a great game.
313
00:17:27,430 --> 00:17:30,070
Blackjack.
We've never played that game.
314
00:17:30,270 --> 00:17:32,110
Don't worry,
I'll teach you.
315
00:17:32,310 --> 00:17:33,820
It's lots of fun.
316
00:17:34,020 --> 00:17:36,820
Whoever gets
all the chips wins.
317
00:17:37,020 --> 00:17:40,220
Whoever loses all the chips
has to go home.
318
00:17:42,230 --> 00:17:45,080
[???]
319
00:17:48,170 --> 00:17:51,100
Certainly is nice to have
dinner in peace and quiet.
320
00:17:51,300 --> 00:17:54,950
Yeah, no
little kids arguing.
321
00:17:55,150 --> 00:17:56,810
Seems strange
eating dinner
322
00:17:57,010 --> 00:17:58,220
without Tracy sticking
her hand in my gravy.
323
00:18:00,120 --> 00:18:02,020
I know.
Without Chris here,
324
00:18:02,220 --> 00:18:04,210
there's no one to throw
my mashed potatoes at.
325
00:18:04,410 --> 00:18:06,820
That does it.
326
00:18:07,020 --> 00:18:09,210
Danny can't even throw
his mashed potatoes at anyone.
327
00:18:09,410 --> 00:18:10,940
I'm gonna go and get them.
328
00:18:11,140 --> 00:18:13,010
You're gonna
go back on your word?
329
00:18:13,210 --> 00:18:14,000
Yes.
330
00:18:16,090 --> 00:18:18,040
Blackjack.
331
00:18:20,220 --> 00:18:24,000
I have 19.
You're not supposed to tell me.
332
00:18:25,160 --> 00:18:29,220
I have 18. Well, I was
gonna draw anyway.
333
00:18:29,420 --> 00:18:33,180
Four. Sorry,
18 and four is 21.
334
00:18:33,380 --> 00:18:34,940
Twenty-two.
335
00:18:35,140 --> 00:18:37,810
Oh, yeah, I forgot.
336
00:18:38,010 --> 00:18:40,200
Mr. Kincaid, do you wanna
borrow some more?
337
00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:42,010
[DOORBELL RINGING]
338
00:18:42,210 --> 00:18:45,840
Oh, no. Practice.
339
00:18:46,040 --> 00:18:47,210
Just 15 more minutes--
340
00:18:47,410 --> 00:18:49,110
SHIRLEY: Hi, Reuben.
Shirley.
341
00:18:54,030 --> 00:18:55,850
Oh, my goodness.
342
00:18:56,050 --> 00:18:57,910
Is this where
you ran away to?
343
00:18:58,110 --> 00:19:00,160
Yeah.
What are you doing here?
344
00:19:00,360 --> 00:19:02,230
I'm running away.
345
00:19:02,430 --> 00:19:03,930
To here?
346
00:19:04,130 --> 00:19:06,890
Yes.
Would you like a brownie?
347
00:19:07,090 --> 00:19:09,930
Mommies don't run away.
That doesn't make sense.
348
00:19:10,130 --> 00:19:12,160
They're right.
You should be home.
349
00:19:12,360 --> 00:19:14,110
You should all be home.
350
00:19:14,310 --> 00:19:16,830
Reuben.
351
00:19:17,030 --> 00:19:19,200
I just dropped by to say
goodbye to Reuben
352
00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:23,090
on my way to hop
a freight train out of town.
353
00:19:23,290 --> 00:19:26,210
Are you really leaving?
Yes.
354
00:19:26,410 --> 00:19:27,850
Why?
355
00:19:28,050 --> 00:19:30,810
I'm just tired
of being the bad guy.
356
00:19:31,010 --> 00:19:32,190
Always having
to tell my children
357
00:19:32,390 --> 00:19:35,030
to pick their things up,
when to go to bed.
358
00:19:35,230 --> 00:19:37,180
They always think I'm mean.
359
00:19:37,380 --> 00:19:39,930
No, we don't.
Yes, we do.
360
00:19:40,130 --> 00:19:41,950
Well, some of the time.
361
00:19:42,150 --> 00:19:44,040
TRACY:
You can't run away.
362
00:19:44,240 --> 00:19:46,830
We need you, right?
Right.
363
00:19:47,030 --> 00:19:51,150
You mean you would
if you were going back home.
364
00:19:51,350 --> 00:19:52,810
TRACY:
Well, yeah.
365
00:19:53,010 --> 00:19:54,800
But mothers have
responsibilities.
366
00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:56,060
You gotta stay home.
367
00:19:56,260 --> 00:19:57,030
Why?
368
00:19:57,230 --> 00:19:59,930
Keith and Laurie
are getting older now.
369
00:20:00,130 --> 00:20:02,130
And Danny can
take care of himself,
370
00:20:02,330 --> 00:20:05,900
and, well,
my two babies are gone.
371
00:20:06,100 --> 00:20:09,210
Mommies need someone
to take care of and to love,
372
00:20:09,410 --> 00:20:11,820
and we need to be loved.
373
00:20:12,020 --> 00:20:16,230
Otherwise, I wouldn't be hopping
that freight train out of town.
374
00:20:18,100 --> 00:20:21,000
I love you.
We both do.
375
00:20:21,200 --> 00:20:22,000
I love you too.
376
00:20:22,200 --> 00:20:25,150
No mother of ours is gonna hop
a freight out of town.
377
00:20:25,350 --> 00:20:26,880
We'll go home first.
378
00:20:27,080 --> 00:20:29,100
We were coming home
an hour ago.
379
00:20:29,300 --> 00:20:32,810
Except Mr. Kincaid
wanted to play blackjack.
380
00:20:33,010 --> 00:20:34,220
You're kidding.
381
00:20:49,050 --> 00:20:53,220
[SINGING "SUMMER DAYS"]
382
00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:42,090
[???]
383
00:23:44,030 --> 00:23:46,150
Tracy, have you been
playing in my gravy?
384
00:23:46,350 --> 00:23:47,950
What makes you
say that?
385
00:23:48,150 --> 00:23:50,870
There's a tiny handprint
in my mashed potatoes.
386
00:23:51,070 --> 00:23:53,080
Mom, Danny's gonna flip
his peas at me.
387
00:23:53,280 --> 00:23:54,960
Danny.
Shirley, I really appreciate
388
00:23:55,160 --> 00:23:56,230
your inviting me
over for dinner.
389
00:23:56,430 --> 00:23:58,000
I'd hoped
it would make up
390
00:23:58,200 --> 00:24:00,130
for the kids
bothering you last night.
391
00:24:00,330 --> 00:24:00,990
Ah.
392
00:24:01,190 --> 00:24:02,860
Yeah, we hear that
393
00:24:03,060 --> 00:24:05,060
happy bachelor life
is really something.
394
00:24:05,260 --> 00:24:06,920
You only know
the half of it.
395
00:24:07,120 --> 00:24:09,020
You're too young
to hear the other half.
396
00:24:10,180 --> 00:24:11,230
DANNY:
Mr. Kincaid?
397
00:24:11,430 --> 00:24:12,930
Yeah?
398
00:24:13,130 --> 00:24:14,880
Bet you 50 cents
I can get that
399
00:24:15,080 --> 00:24:16,230
quarter out without
touching the cup.
400
00:24:18,020 --> 00:24:19,200
You're on.
DANNY: Okay.
401
00:24:19,400 --> 00:24:24,930
Abba-kazabba kazabble,
402
00:24:25,130 --> 00:24:30,080
quarter go
through the table.
403
00:24:33,190 --> 00:24:36,910
Well, that's not
the same quarter. See?
404
00:24:37,110 --> 00:24:39,150
There, I just got it
without touching the cup.
405
00:24:43,030 --> 00:24:44,980
Danny, if you're
ever thinking
406
00:24:45,180 --> 00:24:47,030
of running away
from home...
407
00:24:47,230 --> 00:24:47,870
Yeah?
408
00:24:48,070 --> 00:24:49,110
...do it.
409
00:24:49,310 --> 00:24:51,090
[???]
410
00:24:57,230 --> 00:25:00,050
[???]
26872
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