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1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:04,220
[THE PARTRIDGE FAMILY'S
"COME ON GET HAPPY" PLAYING]
2
00:00:08,170 --> 00:00:12,190
? Hello, world, hear the song
That we're singing ?
3
00:00:12,390 --> 00:00:15,000
? Come on, get happy ?
4
00:00:17,030 --> 00:00:21,050
? A whole lot of lovin'
Is what we'll be bringing ?
5
00:00:21,250 --> 00:00:23,160
? We'll make you happy ?
6
00:00:25,160 --> 00:00:27,960
? We had a dream
We'd go traveling together ?
7
00:00:28,160 --> 00:00:29,900
? We'd spread a little love ?
8
00:00:30,100 --> 00:00:31,910
? And then we'll keep
Movin' on ?
9
00:00:32,110 --> 00:00:35,170
? Something always happens
Whenever we're together ?
10
00:00:35,370 --> 00:00:39,050
? We get a happy feeling
When we're singing a song ?
11
00:00:39,250 --> 00:00:43,000
? Traveling along there's
A song that we're singing ?
12
00:00:43,200 --> 00:00:45,130
? Come on, get happy ?
13
00:00:47,160 --> 00:00:51,140
? A whole lot of lovin'
Is what we'll be bringing ?
14
00:00:51,340 --> 00:00:54,100
? We'll make you happy ?
15
00:00:54,300 --> 00:00:58,130
? We'll make you happy ?
16
00:00:58,330 --> 00:01:02,020
? We'll make you happy ?
17
00:01:14,040 --> 00:01:17,040
[SINGING
"IT'S TIME THAT I KNEW YOU"]
18
00:03:20,110 --> 00:03:22,210
KINCAID:
driving home this way.
19
00:03:22,410 --> 00:03:24,950
Highway 21
is shorter and faster.
20
00:03:25,150 --> 00:03:26,860
SHIRLEY:
This way is a little longer,
21
00:03:27,060 --> 00:03:29,200
but it's much prettier.
KINCAID: You call this pretty?
22
00:03:29,400 --> 00:03:31,820
Where's the glamour,
where's the neon?
23
00:03:32,020 --> 00:03:33,230
Where's your soul?
24
00:03:33,430 --> 00:03:35,000
I sold it in
a garage sale.
25
00:03:35,200 --> 00:03:37,190
After three
long weeks on the road,
26
00:03:37,390 --> 00:03:39,170
we deserve
a few days to relax.
27
00:03:39,370 --> 00:03:40,820
I've been
singing so much,
28
00:03:41,020 --> 00:03:42,070
my cheeks
are getting callused.
29
00:03:42,270 --> 00:03:42,960
Keith, slow down.
30
00:03:43,160 --> 00:03:45,130
That looks like
a great spot for a picnic.
31
00:03:45,330 --> 00:03:49,070
A picnic? Darn, I left
my maypole at home.
32
00:04:01,110 --> 00:04:02,030
Let's go explore.
33
00:04:02,230 --> 00:04:04,890
Don't go too far.
We won't.
34
00:04:05,090 --> 00:04:08,200
If we have to have a picnic,
in the parking lot?
35
00:04:08,400 --> 00:04:10,010
Oh, Reuben.
I'm serious.
36
00:04:10,210 --> 00:04:12,140
You don't have
to worry about poison oak
37
00:04:12,340 --> 00:04:14,170
and asphalt
doesn't get in your shoes.
38
00:04:14,370 --> 00:04:16,100
Why don't we spread
the blankets here.
39
00:04:16,300 --> 00:04:18,800
If we want to make
Mr. Kincaid happy,
40
00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:21,130
maybe we should spread
the blankets under the bus.
41
00:04:21,330 --> 00:04:24,000
Perfect. I love oil
in my salad.
42
00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:27,110
Mom, Mom, guess what we found!
What?
43
00:04:27,310 --> 00:04:29,130
A mermaid.
A mermaid?
44
00:04:29,330 --> 00:04:31,140
Over there, come on.
45
00:04:31,340 --> 00:04:34,000
It's probably
a dead perch.
46
00:04:34,200 --> 00:04:36,070
[???]
47
00:04:40,030 --> 00:04:42,000
TRACY:
The mermaid's in the pond.
48
00:04:42,200 --> 00:04:44,140
[???]
49
00:04:52,110 --> 00:04:53,920
What is it?
Uh, it's nothing.
50
00:04:54,120 --> 00:04:55,890
Right, nothing.
I don't see a thing.
51
00:04:56,090 --> 00:04:57,180
Then, how come
I can't look?
52
00:04:59,110 --> 00:05:00,970
[???]
53
00:05:01,170 --> 00:05:03,020
Oh, really?
54
00:05:03,220 --> 00:05:06,100
Out. Everybody out.
55
00:05:06,300 --> 00:05:08,050
[???]
56
00:05:13,130 --> 00:05:15,070
That's no dead perch.
57
00:05:16,170 --> 00:05:19,060
Come on, Danny.
58
00:05:19,260 --> 00:05:21,110
[???]
59
00:05:24,220 --> 00:05:27,030
[???]
60
00:05:35,100 --> 00:05:37,070
[???]
61
00:05:43,040 --> 00:05:46,060
Isn't this a beautiful place?
KEITH: Sure is.
62
00:05:46,260 --> 00:05:48,000
JENNY:
when I'm in this area.
63
00:05:48,200 --> 00:05:50,050
Oh? I'll have
to remember that.
64
00:05:50,250 --> 00:05:51,160
Me too.
65
00:05:53,220 --> 00:05:56,080
How long have you been
on the road, Jenny?
66
00:05:56,280 --> 00:05:58,030
About a year.
feel about that?
67
00:05:58,230 --> 00:06:01,000
My parents are dead.
I'm the only one left.
68
00:06:01,200 --> 00:06:03,900
Oh, I'm sorry.
No, don't be.
69
00:06:04,100 --> 00:06:08,030
We weren't a very close family.
I hardly ever knew them at all.
70
00:06:08,230 --> 00:06:09,820
Gee, that's rough.
71
00:06:10,020 --> 00:06:12,170
Well, maybe I missed a lot
not having a family,
72
00:06:12,370 --> 00:06:15,110
but it taught me
to do a lot of things by myself.
73
00:06:16,140 --> 00:06:17,170
[CAR APPROACHING]
74
00:06:20,150 --> 00:06:22,110
Looks like we have company.
75
00:06:24,130 --> 00:06:25,800
Uh-oh.
76
00:06:26,000 --> 00:06:27,860
What does he want?
77
00:06:28,060 --> 00:06:30,050
I'll bet you anything
he wants to hassle me.
78
00:06:30,250 --> 00:06:32,000
Have you done
something wrong?
79
00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:33,180
No, but a lot of people
80
00:06:33,380 --> 00:06:35,030
don't seem to like
the way I look.
81
00:06:35,230 --> 00:06:37,060
They've never seen
your dead-perch act.
82
00:06:42,070 --> 00:06:43,880
Hi, folks.
83
00:06:44,080 --> 00:06:45,190
Are you really
the Partridge Family?
84
00:06:45,390 --> 00:06:47,200
I saw your name
on the side of the bus.
85
00:06:47,400 --> 00:06:49,020
Yes, we are.
Imagine that.
86
00:06:49,220 --> 00:06:51,180
I listen to your records
all the time.
87
00:06:51,380 --> 00:06:52,890
Thank you.
88
00:06:53,090 --> 00:06:54,220
What can we do
for you, officer?
89
00:06:54,420 --> 00:06:55,930
I have a report
90
00:06:56,130 --> 00:06:57,920
that there's a hippie girl
camping around here.
91
00:06:58,120 --> 00:06:59,160
You haven't seen her,
have you?
92
00:07:02,030 --> 00:07:03,200
Has this girl
done something wrong?
93
00:07:03,400 --> 00:07:04,970
Oh, no.
But folks around here
94
00:07:05,170 --> 00:07:07,180
just don't like
that kind hanging around.
95
00:07:07,380 --> 00:07:10,080
What do you intend to do with
this girl when you find her?
96
00:07:10,280 --> 00:07:12,110
Arrest her
for vagrancy or something.
97
00:07:12,310 --> 00:07:13,830
We like to keep them out
so the area
98
00:07:14,030 --> 00:07:16,060
can be enjoyed
by decent folks like yourself.
99
00:07:16,260 --> 00:07:17,190
I see.
100
00:07:19,100 --> 00:07:22,110
Is this girl with you?
101
00:07:22,310 --> 00:07:24,000
[???]
102
00:07:24,200 --> 00:07:25,880
Yes, she is.
103
00:07:26,080 --> 00:07:28,030
POLICEMAN:
Okay, then, that's all right.
104
00:07:28,230 --> 00:07:30,030
Say, before I leave,
I wonder if I can get
105
00:07:30,230 --> 00:07:32,180
an autograph
for my son, do you mind?
106
00:07:32,380 --> 00:07:34,110
No, not at all.
107
00:07:40,090 --> 00:07:43,190
What's your son's name?
Officer Mooney.
108
00:07:43,390 --> 00:07:46,000
[???]
109
00:07:58,120 --> 00:07:59,900
We should be home
in a couple of hours.
110
00:08:00,100 --> 00:08:02,220
You might as well spend
the night at our place.
111
00:08:02,420 --> 00:08:03,890
Thank you.
112
00:08:04,090 --> 00:08:06,120
You know, you really
have a great family.
113
00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:08,040
You're all so together.
114
00:08:08,240 --> 00:08:11,210
Yeah. We get along
most of the time.
115
00:08:11,410 --> 00:08:14,030
In a way I feel sorry for you.
You do?
116
00:08:14,230 --> 00:08:17,810
You've got everything going
for you, except freedom.
117
00:08:18,010 --> 00:08:19,110
Who's not free?
118
00:08:19,310 --> 00:08:22,090
I mean, you all
have to work so much.
119
00:08:22,290 --> 00:08:23,810
I think we're lucky.
120
00:08:24,010 --> 00:08:26,040
I mean, we do work hard,
but let's face it:
121
00:08:26,240 --> 00:08:28,200
There are worse ways
of making a living.
122
00:08:28,400 --> 00:08:31,000
Yeah, there's other things
besides making money.
123
00:08:31,200 --> 00:08:32,810
True,
but the only reason
124
00:08:33,010 --> 00:08:34,170
Mom let us form the group
in the first place
125
00:08:34,370 --> 00:08:37,070
was to make enough money
to put us through college.
126
00:08:39,160 --> 00:08:40,910
But I guess
it would be nice
127
00:08:41,110 --> 00:08:43,040
if we had a million dollars
and didn't have to work.
128
00:08:45,170 --> 00:08:46,910
As a kid,
129
00:08:47,110 --> 00:08:49,210
I always wished someone would
give me a million dollars.
130
00:08:51,010 --> 00:08:52,220
Yeah, that'd be all right.
131
00:08:52,420 --> 00:08:55,010
DANNY:
Tax-free?
132
00:08:55,210 --> 00:08:58,150
[???]
133
00:09:06,130 --> 00:09:08,190
Morning.
JENNY: Morning.
134
00:09:08,390 --> 00:09:11,080
DANNY:
to a Boy Scout jamboree.
135
00:09:12,220 --> 00:09:15,000
But I don't think
you'll pass the physical.
136
00:09:15,200 --> 00:09:17,000
I hope not.
137
00:09:17,200 --> 00:09:19,160
Well, I guess
I better get along.
138
00:09:19,360 --> 00:09:21,000
Where you gonna go?
139
00:09:21,200 --> 00:09:22,090
I don't know.
140
00:09:22,290 --> 00:09:24,940
But I'll see you again.
Goodbye.
141
00:09:25,140 --> 00:09:27,230
I think Tracy'd like
to say goodbye. I'll go get her.
142
00:09:27,430 --> 00:09:29,180
I looked into her room
on the way down.
143
00:09:29,380 --> 00:09:32,000
Let her sleep.
Goodbye.
144
00:09:32,200 --> 00:09:36,230
Look, could I give you
a ride or something?
145
00:09:36,430 --> 00:09:39,180
No, thanks.
I'd rather walk.
146
00:09:39,380 --> 00:09:40,900
Goodbye.
Be careful.
147
00:09:41,100 --> 00:09:42,860
Don't take a ride
from strangers.
148
00:09:43,060 --> 00:09:44,130
DANNY:
See you later.
149
00:09:44,330 --> 00:09:46,220
Goodbye, Jenny.
Bye.
150
00:09:48,120 --> 00:09:51,000
Mom, look what the tooth fairy
left under my pillow.
151
00:09:51,200 --> 00:09:52,220
I didn't know
you had a loose tooth.
152
00:09:52,420 --> 00:09:55,000
I didn't.
I guess I owe her one.
153
00:09:55,200 --> 00:09:56,150
What is it, Mom?
154
00:09:56,350 --> 00:09:58,110
A bankbook.
155
00:10:01,160 --> 00:10:04,050
A million dollars
deposited in my name.
156
00:10:04,250 --> 00:10:05,190
[???]
157
00:10:07,120 --> 00:10:09,120
Danny, is this
your idea of a joke?
158
00:10:09,320 --> 00:10:10,220
Are you kidding?
159
00:10:10,420 --> 00:10:13,050
I don't even pretend
to give away money.
160
00:10:13,250 --> 00:10:16,140
Let me see.
Something fell out.
161
00:10:20,100 --> 00:10:23,130
It's a note
from Jenny.
162
00:10:23,330 --> 00:10:24,830
"Hi.
163
00:10:25,030 --> 00:10:28,230
You probably think this
is a joke, but it isn't.
164
00:10:28,430 --> 00:10:31,880
I inherited a $14-million
business from my father,
165
00:10:32,080 --> 00:10:33,810
and I doubt
if this even amounts
166
00:10:34,010 --> 00:10:35,140
to the interest
in his investments.
167
00:10:35,340 --> 00:10:37,840
Please accept this
not as a gift,
168
00:10:38,040 --> 00:10:40,200
but for being a family to me
that I never had.
169
00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:41,900
I hope you use
the money
170
00:10:42,100 --> 00:10:44,170
to find the kind
of freedom I have.
171
00:10:44,370 --> 00:10:45,940
Love, Jenny."
172
00:10:46,140 --> 00:10:49,860
I think the tooth fairy
just bounced her first check.
173
00:10:50,060 --> 00:10:52,200
Nobody gives away
a million dollars.
174
00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:54,140
No, they don't.
175
00:10:56,020 --> 00:10:57,090
[PHONE RINGING]
176
00:11:01,140 --> 00:11:03,810
Hello?
Mrs. Partridge?
177
00:11:04,010 --> 00:11:05,800
Yes, this is Mrs. Partridge.
178
00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:07,190
This is L.J. Belson.
179
00:11:07,390 --> 00:11:10,040
President of the San Pueblo
National Bank.
180
00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:11,030
Yes, Mr. Belson.
181
00:11:11,230 --> 00:11:14,120
I'm very sorry I was late
with that mortgage payment.
182
00:11:14,320 --> 00:11:16,020
But I mailed it
out yesterday.
183
00:11:16,220 --> 00:11:17,960
BELSON:
Oh, I'm sure you did.
184
00:11:18,160 --> 00:11:20,210
I was just calling
to congratulate you
185
00:11:20,410 --> 00:11:24,880
on being our first
million-dollar depositor.
186
00:11:25,080 --> 00:11:26,800
Now, now,
you be sure
187
00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:29,170
and call me
if you need any little thing.
188
00:11:29,370 --> 00:11:32,840
Why, yes...
189
00:11:33,040 --> 00:11:35,140
I will. Thank you.
190
00:11:38,110 --> 00:11:38,970
What's wrong, Mom?
191
00:11:39,170 --> 00:11:40,230
Are they foreclosing?
192
00:11:40,430 --> 00:11:43,230
No, not today.
193
00:11:43,430 --> 00:11:44,950
Kids,
194
00:11:45,150 --> 00:11:46,220
we're millionaires.
195
00:11:46,420 --> 00:11:49,050
[???]
196
00:11:56,070 --> 00:11:57,220
[???]
197
00:12:04,140 --> 00:12:05,900
Now that you've got
a million dollars,
198
00:12:06,100 --> 00:12:08,040
what's the first thing
you're gonna do?
199
00:12:08,240 --> 00:12:08,950
Gloat.
200
00:12:09,150 --> 00:12:11,040
Besides that.
201
00:12:11,240 --> 00:12:12,870
Invest it.
202
00:12:13,070 --> 00:12:15,100
I think the first thing
I'm gonna do is
203
00:12:15,300 --> 00:12:18,130
charter a boat and sail
to the Caribbean.
204
00:12:18,330 --> 00:12:19,980
Great.
I'll rent it to you.
205
00:12:20,180 --> 00:12:22,110
Why don't you buy
the boat, Keith?
206
00:12:22,310 --> 00:12:23,960
Because
I bought it first.
207
00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:26,130
What are you
gonna do, Chris?
208
00:12:26,330 --> 00:12:28,190
Buy a catcher's mitt.
209
00:12:28,390 --> 00:12:31,820
No wonder you're so short,
you think small.
210
00:12:32,020 --> 00:12:34,210
But then I'm gonna buy
the Los Angeles Dodgers.
211
00:12:34,410 --> 00:12:36,180
I'm not selling.
212
00:12:37,220 --> 00:12:39,020
Hi.
213
00:12:40,170 --> 00:12:41,920
Yachting caps?
214
00:12:42,120 --> 00:12:45,020
Why not? Our ship's
finally come in.
215
00:12:45,220 --> 00:12:46,150
[???]
216
00:12:51,080 --> 00:12:52,840
Something wrong?
217
00:12:53,040 --> 00:12:56,000
Everybody in town must know
we have a million dollars.
218
00:12:56,200 --> 00:12:57,880
People keep calling me
trying to sell me something.
219
00:12:58,080 --> 00:12:59,220
That phone hasn't
stopped ringing.
220
00:12:59,420 --> 00:13:02,880
So have it disconnected.
We can afford it.
221
00:13:03,080 --> 00:13:06,100
I'm not gonna spend
any of that money.
222
00:13:06,300 --> 00:13:10,000
Mom, you don't make
any money if you save it.
223
00:13:10,200 --> 00:13:11,830
You have to invest.
224
00:13:12,030 --> 00:13:16,170
Danny, we're not gonna save it
or invest it or anything else.
225
00:13:16,370 --> 00:13:18,100
We're going to give it back.
226
00:13:18,300 --> 00:13:19,820
You're kidding.
227
00:13:20,020 --> 00:13:23,930
I have the police out searching
for Jenny right now.
228
00:13:24,130 --> 00:13:26,810
I'm sure by now she's had time
to think about it.
229
00:13:27,010 --> 00:13:28,060
She'll want it back.
230
00:13:28,260 --> 00:13:29,000
Oh, I doubt it.
231
00:13:29,200 --> 00:13:31,070
I think that's why
she left the way she did,
232
00:13:31,270 --> 00:13:32,170
so we had to take it.
233
00:13:32,370 --> 00:13:34,930
Oh, the Partridge Family,
all together.
234
00:13:35,130 --> 00:13:36,920
Just as I imagined
you would be.
235
00:13:37,120 --> 00:13:40,010
We're not all together.
Laurie and Tracy aren't here.
236
00:13:40,210 --> 00:13:42,840
Well, I have
a very poor imagination.
237
00:13:43,040 --> 00:13:45,000
Allow me
to introduce myself.
238
00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:46,990
Lumus D. Palmer.
239
00:13:47,190 --> 00:13:49,110
We have mutual friends.
240
00:13:49,310 --> 00:13:50,890
Who?
241
00:13:51,090 --> 00:13:54,820
I understand you may be seeking
roomier living quarters.
242
00:13:55,020 --> 00:13:58,100
I know of a luxurious estate
on the coast of Maine.
243
00:13:58,300 --> 00:14:00,830
Now I recognize that voice.
244
00:14:01,030 --> 00:14:02,910
I just talked
to you on the phone.
245
00:14:03,110 --> 00:14:05,210
Yes, unfortunately
we were disconnected.
246
00:14:05,410 --> 00:14:07,200
I hung up on you!
247
00:14:09,050 --> 00:14:11,880
If you're
not interested in that,
248
00:14:12,080 --> 00:14:15,080
perhaps a rancho grande
in West Texas.
249
00:14:15,280 --> 00:14:15,990
Go away.
250
00:14:16,190 --> 00:14:19,060
How about a hunting lodge
in Detroit?
251
00:14:19,260 --> 00:14:21,830
Out!
252
00:14:22,030 --> 00:14:24,200
A manservant,
I have excellent references.
253
00:14:26,210 --> 00:14:31,130
But I don't need a Learjet.
It wouldn't fit in our garage.
254
00:14:34,030 --> 00:14:35,800
TRACY:
Mom?
255
00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:38,080
I brought a friend home.
Is that okay?
256
00:14:38,280 --> 00:14:40,060
Sure.
Come on in, Bill.
257
00:14:45,160 --> 00:14:48,000
Tracy, where
did you get that?
258
00:14:48,200 --> 00:14:49,900
A man gave it to me.
259
00:14:50,100 --> 00:14:52,850
A man just doesn't
give you a pony.
260
00:14:53,050 --> 00:14:54,840
He did.
He said he'd bill you later.
261
00:14:55,040 --> 00:14:56,170
That's why
I named him Bill.
262
00:15:00,050 --> 00:15:01,820
[???]
263
00:15:02,020 --> 00:15:03,080
[DOORBELL RINGING]
264
00:15:03,280 --> 00:15:05,020
I'll get it.
265
00:15:09,010 --> 00:15:10,230
Miss Laurie Partridge?
Yes.
266
00:15:10,430 --> 00:15:11,930
My name is Sir Guy.
267
00:15:12,130 --> 00:15:16,010
You bought a dress
I designed at Bartlett's today.
268
00:15:16,210 --> 00:15:20,200
I thought I might take
this opportunity to deliver it.
269
00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:22,930
In person.
Oh, well, thank you.
270
00:15:23,130 --> 00:15:25,840
I'm pleased that
you selected my design.
271
00:15:26,040 --> 00:15:27,220
Though it is the cheapest...
272
00:15:29,070 --> 00:15:31,000
The least expensive
of my line.
273
00:15:31,200 --> 00:15:34,140
I thought I might take
this opportunity to show you
274
00:15:34,340 --> 00:15:36,120
my more exclusive designs.
275
00:15:36,320 --> 00:15:37,180
Sheila.
276
00:15:37,380 --> 00:15:40,010
[???]
277
00:15:40,210 --> 00:15:44,140
Sheila is wearing
a black crepe evening dress
278
00:15:44,340 --> 00:15:46,850
with a modest
plunge back.
279
00:15:47,050 --> 00:15:50,170
And silver slippers, perfect
for a night out with a diplomat
280
00:15:50,370 --> 00:15:52,810
or your favorite
student prince.
281
00:15:53,010 --> 00:15:56,000
Only $500, without
the slippers, of course.
282
00:15:56,200 --> 00:15:58,000
Thank you, Sheila.
283
00:15:58,200 --> 00:15:59,060
Tanya.
284
00:16:00,230 --> 00:16:03,210
Tanya is dressed
in a silver lamé sheath
285
00:16:03,410 --> 00:16:05,830
accessorized
with mother-of-pearl.
286
00:16:06,030 --> 00:16:08,150
Mom, there're five
more girls out there.
287
00:16:08,350 --> 00:16:10,230
I can bring more.
288
00:16:10,430 --> 00:16:11,900
I'm sorry.
289
00:16:12,100 --> 00:16:15,060
I don't approve of
door-to-door fashion shows.
290
00:16:15,260 --> 00:16:16,850
It's only $350.
291
00:16:17,050 --> 00:16:21,010
I don't care. Get your
mother-of-pearl out of here!
292
00:16:21,210 --> 00:16:23,100
As you wish. Come, Tanya.
293
00:16:23,300 --> 00:16:27,210
I should have realized
we were dealing with
294
00:16:27,410 --> 00:16:29,190
peasants.
295
00:16:29,390 --> 00:16:31,880
[???]
296
00:16:32,080 --> 00:16:34,130
Mom, I didn't know
a thing about that.
297
00:16:34,330 --> 00:16:35,900
I just bought a $10 dress.
298
00:16:36,100 --> 00:16:39,070
Honey, it isn't your fault.
They found out we're rich,
299
00:16:39,270 --> 00:16:41,180
and the sharks
are coming in for the--
300
00:16:42,210 --> 00:16:43,930
Excuse me,
ladies.
301
00:16:44,130 --> 00:16:46,940
Who are you?
A telephone man, lady.
302
00:16:47,140 --> 00:16:50,120
I just put a phone
in that redheaded kid's room.
303
00:16:50,320 --> 00:16:52,090
Oh, you did.
304
00:16:52,290 --> 00:16:54,050
[???]
305
00:16:55,120 --> 00:16:56,800
Danny?
306
00:16:57,000 --> 00:16:59,110
DANNY:
Sorry, Mom, I'm indisposed.
307
00:16:59,310 --> 00:17:02,140
You better get disposed
and open this door.
308
00:17:02,340 --> 00:17:04,910
Mom, Howard Hughes
never opens his door.
309
00:17:05,110 --> 00:17:06,840
Danny, you're
gonna open this door
310
00:17:07,040 --> 00:17:09,030
and get rid
of that phone immediately.
311
00:17:09,230 --> 00:17:10,220
Okay.
312
00:17:12,160 --> 00:17:15,940
Mom, if you're not gonna
let me be a financial mogul,
313
00:17:16,140 --> 00:17:19,110
you probably won't let me keep
my private secretary either.
314
00:17:19,310 --> 00:17:21,040
Your what?
315
00:17:22,210 --> 00:17:25,000
[???]
316
00:17:32,050 --> 00:17:33,200
What a rotten day.
317
00:17:33,400 --> 00:17:35,130
LAURIE:
What happened?
318
00:17:36,220 --> 00:17:38,150
The owner
of the taco stand
319
00:17:38,350 --> 00:17:40,820
insisted I open
a charge account.
320
00:17:41,020 --> 00:17:42,820
I did because
it gave me a chance
321
00:17:43,020 --> 00:17:45,080
to do something
I always wanted to do.
322
00:17:45,280 --> 00:17:45,940
Oh?
323
00:17:46,140 --> 00:17:48,850
Yeah, I took
all my friends down there,
324
00:17:49,050 --> 00:17:51,180
and I let them eat
all they wanted to, on me.
325
00:17:51,380 --> 00:17:53,130
Twenty-six bucks
worth of tacos.
326
00:17:53,330 --> 00:17:54,890
That made you feel bad?
327
00:17:55,090 --> 00:17:57,120
I thought it would be
a groovy thing to do, you know?
328
00:17:57,320 --> 00:17:59,150
But they didn't
appreciate it.
329
00:17:59,350 --> 00:18:01,000
I mean,
they ate the tacos.
330
00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:03,040
They didn't
eat them with meaning.
331
00:18:03,240 --> 00:18:05,820
You know what I mean?
DANNY: Yeah, I know.
332
00:18:06,020 --> 00:18:08,930
I gave Punky Lazaar
my old first baseman's mitt.
333
00:18:09,130 --> 00:18:11,180
He asked me why
I didn't buy him a new one.
334
00:18:11,380 --> 00:18:13,030
I guess
when you get something
335
00:18:13,230 --> 00:18:15,840
for nothing
you just don't appreciate it
336
00:18:16,040 --> 00:18:18,030
as much as when you
have to work for it yourself.
337
00:18:19,170 --> 00:18:20,950
[DOORBELL RINGING]
338
00:18:21,150 --> 00:18:23,220
If you're
not a salesman, come in.
339
00:18:28,210 --> 00:18:30,050
Hi.
340
00:18:32,220 --> 00:18:33,900
Well, guess what.
341
00:18:34,100 --> 00:18:35,830
I finally managed
to get you booked
342
00:18:36,030 --> 00:18:37,190
into Oceanside Park
this weekend.
343
00:18:37,390 --> 00:18:39,190
Why should we work?
We're filthy rich.
344
00:18:41,170 --> 00:18:42,920
I'll tell you why:
It'll be fun.
345
00:18:43,120 --> 00:18:44,950
I'd much rather be
like we were two weeks ago
346
00:18:45,150 --> 00:18:46,230
than like
we are right now.
347
00:18:46,430 --> 00:18:48,020
Me too.
I never dreamed
348
00:18:48,220 --> 00:18:50,820
that money could make us
fall apart like this.
349
00:18:51,020 --> 00:18:53,170
It's just like the tacos.
It was given to us.
350
00:18:53,370 --> 00:18:56,180
Well, then I think
the first order of business
351
00:18:56,380 --> 00:18:58,130
is to give the money back.
352
00:18:58,330 --> 00:18:59,140
[???]
353
00:19:02,210 --> 00:19:04,230
Can I have a little time
to think it over?
354
00:19:04,430 --> 00:19:06,890
KEITH:
Where are we gonna find Jenny?
355
00:19:07,090 --> 00:19:08,230
The police haven't come up
with anything yet.
356
00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:11,840
Well, have you
tried looking
357
00:19:12,040 --> 00:19:14,060
in the same place
you found her?
358
00:19:14,260 --> 00:19:16,130
[???]
359
00:19:27,180 --> 00:19:30,040
Oh, no sense
in all of us going.
360
00:19:30,240 --> 00:19:32,870
I'll go see
if she's here.
361
00:19:33,070 --> 00:19:36,230
I'd better go with him,
Mom. He might get lost.
362
00:19:36,430 --> 00:19:39,210
Three heads are
better than two.
363
00:19:39,410 --> 00:19:41,230
[???]
364
00:19:46,130 --> 00:19:48,060
I take it you
found her.
365
00:19:48,260 --> 00:19:50,190
Found? Who?
366
00:19:50,390 --> 00:19:52,820
DANNY:
The perch.
367
00:19:53,020 --> 00:19:54,180
Come on.
368
00:19:59,140 --> 00:20:01,990
SHIRLEY:
with money if you work for it.
369
00:20:02,190 --> 00:20:03,950
It's a symbol for your labor.
370
00:20:04,150 --> 00:20:06,170
So you can respect it
and appreciate it.
371
00:20:06,370 --> 00:20:09,030
But if it's given to you,
it isn't the same.
372
00:20:09,230 --> 00:20:10,030
It isn't really yours.
373
00:20:10,230 --> 00:20:11,960
KEITH:
Money isn't freedom.
374
00:20:12,160 --> 00:20:14,840
If it were, you wouldn't be
living the way you do.
375
00:20:15,040 --> 00:20:17,800
I guess you're right.
I hardly spend any money at all.
376
00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:20,200
That's why you feel free.
You do it yourself.
377
00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:26,820
Well, if that's the way
you feel, I'll take it back.
378
00:20:27,020 --> 00:20:27,980
This is the first time
379
00:20:28,180 --> 00:20:30,200
someone's given back
a million dollars.
380
00:20:30,400 --> 00:20:31,880
Well,
381
00:20:32,080 --> 00:20:33,980
not quite a million.
382
00:20:34,180 --> 00:20:36,800
Being a millionaire
has some overhead.
383
00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:39,800
Installing a phone,
uninstalling a phone.
384
00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:42,060
Twenty-six dollars
worth of tacos.
385
00:20:42,260 --> 00:20:43,870
One million dollars even.
386
00:20:44,070 --> 00:20:46,020
You're gonna make up
the difference.
387
00:20:46,220 --> 00:20:47,000
You're kidding?
388
00:20:48,220 --> 00:20:52,010
Will I have to pay for the man
who cleaned up after my pony?
389
00:20:52,210 --> 00:20:54,140
[???]
390
00:20:59,170 --> 00:21:02,160
[SINGING "IT'S TIME
THAT I KNEW YOU BETTER"]
391
00:22:52,130 --> 00:22:54,060
[CROWD CLAPPING]
392
00:22:57,160 --> 00:22:59,150
[???]
393
00:23:09,210 --> 00:23:11,140
[???]
394
00:23:17,110 --> 00:23:21,130
With a hotel,
that's $2000 you owe me.
395
00:23:21,330 --> 00:23:22,830
Okay.
396
00:23:23,030 --> 00:23:25,230
Let's see, I can mortgage
Baltic and Oriental.
397
00:23:25,430 --> 00:23:29,180
Uh-huh. And that
puts you about 1900 short.
398
00:23:29,380 --> 00:23:31,810
Face it, you're
out of the game.
399
00:23:32,010 --> 00:23:33,220
I've got a deal
for you.
400
00:23:33,420 --> 00:23:36,120
How about if I owe you
the money and pay you later?
401
00:23:36,320 --> 00:23:37,940
Not a chance.
Pay up.
402
00:23:38,140 --> 00:23:39,830
Look, you've got
all the money now.
403
00:23:40,030 --> 00:23:41,210
What good will
it do you if I go out?
404
00:23:41,410 --> 00:23:42,940
I'll win.
405
00:23:43,140 --> 00:23:46,190
A bird out of the game
is worth two in contention.
406
00:23:46,390 --> 00:23:48,020
[PHONE RINGING]
407
00:23:51,220 --> 00:23:53,870
Hello?
Mrs. Partridge?
408
00:23:54,070 --> 00:23:55,210
This is L.J. Belson.
409
00:23:55,410 --> 00:23:57,080
President of the bank.
410
00:23:57,280 --> 00:23:59,840
Oh, yes, Mr. Belson.
411
00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:02,130
I've called
to congratulate you again.
412
00:24:02,330 --> 00:24:06,170
You were the first person
to deposit a million dollars.
413
00:24:06,370 --> 00:24:11,820
You were also the first person
to withdraw a million dollars.
414
00:24:12,020 --> 00:24:15,210
Yes, I'm sorry about that,
Mr. Belson, but things happen.
415
00:24:15,410 --> 00:24:19,020
Please, please,
no excuses are necessary.
416
00:24:19,220 --> 00:24:20,950
Easy come, easy go.
417
00:24:21,150 --> 00:24:24,000
Of course,
we'll continue to extend
418
00:24:24,200 --> 00:24:27,180
the same, fine courteous
service we always have.
419
00:24:27,380 --> 00:24:29,840
Thank you.
There's only one thing:
420
00:24:30,040 --> 00:24:32,150
Your mortgage payment
is one week late.
421
00:24:32,350 --> 00:24:33,940
I'd like to see that check
422
00:24:34,140 --> 00:24:35,940
in this office
next week or else.
423
00:24:36,140 --> 00:24:39,220
If you've already mailed
the check, ignore this call.
424
00:24:39,420 --> 00:24:41,220
I have and I will.
425
00:24:41,420 --> 00:24:43,130
Goodbye.
426
00:24:45,050 --> 00:24:46,060
What was that
all about?
427
00:24:46,260 --> 00:24:47,030
Do not pass go.
428
00:24:47,230 --> 00:24:49,200
Do not collect
a million dollars.
429
00:24:49,400 --> 00:24:51,100
[???]
430
00:24:54,050 --> 00:24:56,090
[???]
28264
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