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1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:04,220
[THE PARTRIDGE FAMILY'S
"COME ON GET HAPPY" PLAYING]
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? Hello, world, hear the song
That we're singing ?
3
00:00:12,390 --> 00:00:15,000
? Come on, get happy ?
4
00:00:17,030 --> 00:00:21,050
? A whole lot of lovin'
Is what we'll be bringing ?
5
00:00:21,250 --> 00:00:23,170
? We'll make you happy ?
6
00:00:25,170 --> 00:00:27,960
? We had a dream
We'd go traveling together ?
7
00:00:28,160 --> 00:00:29,900
? We'd spread a little love ?
8
00:00:30,100 --> 00:00:31,910
? And then we'll keep
Movin' on ?
9
00:00:32,110 --> 00:00:35,170
? Something always happens
Whenever we're together ?
10
00:00:35,370 --> 00:00:39,050
? We get a happy feeling
When we're singing a song ?
11
00:00:39,250 --> 00:00:43,000
? Traveling along there's
A song that we're singing ?
12
00:00:43,200 --> 00:00:45,130
? Come on, get happy ?
13
00:00:47,160 --> 00:00:51,140
? A whole lot of lovin'
Is what we'll be bringing ?
14
00:00:51,340 --> 00:00:54,100
? We'll make you happy ?
15
00:00:54,300 --> 00:00:58,130
? We'll make you happy ?
16
00:00:58,330 --> 00:01:02,020
? We'll make you happy ?
17
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[???]
18
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Hi, Mom.
Hi.
19
00:01:17,180 --> 00:01:20,930
How was the haircut?
Terrific, if you like baldness.
20
00:01:21,130 --> 00:01:22,860
They hardly took any off.
21
00:01:23,060 --> 00:01:25,190
You thinking of buying
that coat?
22
00:01:25,390 --> 00:01:29,040
Honey, that's not the sort
for herself.
23
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Why not?
24
00:01:30,200 --> 00:01:33,100
Because it's wildly exotic
and frivolous.
25
00:01:33,300 --> 00:01:36,020
You like it, though.
Yes, I like it.
26
00:01:36,220 --> 00:01:40,000
I didn't think you were
materialistic things.
27
00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:44,080
Well, I do have my moments
from time to time.
28
00:01:44,280 --> 00:01:47,090
Well, it's nice to know
in common.
29
00:01:49,020 --> 00:01:51,020
[???]
30
00:01:55,120 --> 00:01:57,970
Mail call.
31
00:01:58,170 --> 00:02:00,840
Partridge, Keith.
32
00:02:01,040 --> 00:02:03,070
Partridge, Laurie.
33
00:02:03,270 --> 00:02:04,850
Resident.
34
00:02:05,050 --> 00:02:07,080
Partridge, Keith.
35
00:02:07,280 --> 00:02:09,820
Partridge, Shirley.
Mom.
36
00:02:10,020 --> 00:02:11,160
Partridge, Danny.
37
00:02:11,360 --> 00:02:12,930
Resident.
38
00:02:13,130 --> 00:02:14,940
Anything important
in the mail?
39
00:02:15,140 --> 00:02:18,000
No, nothing interesting.
Just personal mail.
40
00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:20,210
What do you call interesting?
Checks.
41
00:02:20,410 --> 00:02:23,030
How can you tell without
even opening the envelope?
42
00:02:23,230 --> 00:02:27,200
Well, when there's money inside,
my palms start to sweat.
43
00:02:27,400 --> 00:02:31,220
Mom, there's a letter here
for you from Grandma.
44
00:02:31,420 --> 00:02:35,020
Would you open it for me, honey?
of us, anyway.
45
00:02:35,220 --> 00:02:37,800
Okay.
46
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It's a birthday card.
for three weeks.
47
00:02:41,300 --> 00:02:44,900
You know your grandmother.
out in September.
48
00:02:45,100 --> 00:02:47,160
How old will you be, Mom?
49
00:02:47,360 --> 00:02:48,960
Twenty-three.
50
00:02:49,160 --> 00:02:52,230
Mom, you don't expect him
to buy that, do you?
51
00:02:52,430 --> 00:02:54,820
Why don't you tell him
the truth?
52
00:02:55,020 --> 00:02:57,140
Because the last time
I told him my age
53
00:02:57,340 --> 00:02:59,110
he ran down
the street screaming,
54
00:02:59,310 --> 00:03:01,200
"My mommy's 32,"
to all the neighbors.
55
00:03:01,400 --> 00:03:04,030
So, what's wrong with that?
I was only 31.
56
00:03:04,230 --> 00:03:06,870
You don't understand
anything about women.
57
00:03:07,070 --> 00:03:08,150
I was just a kid then.
58
00:03:10,130 --> 00:03:12,100
[???]
59
00:03:14,090 --> 00:03:15,840
Has anybody got any ideas
60
00:03:16,040 --> 00:03:18,020
about what they're gonna do
for Mom's birthday?
61
00:03:18,220 --> 00:03:21,030
I thought about offering to do
all the cooking for a month.
62
00:03:21,230 --> 00:03:24,200
How about you?
Buy the family a stomach pump.
63
00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:25,850
Very funny.
64
00:03:26,050 --> 00:03:28,230
I know exactly
what I'm gonna buy her.
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00:03:28,430 --> 00:03:30,950
You do?
Well, what is it?
66
00:03:31,150 --> 00:03:34,130
Something wildly exotic
and frivolous.
67
00:03:34,330 --> 00:03:35,220
[???]
68
00:03:47,100 --> 00:03:49,050
[???]
69
00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:09,150
Did you find out what it costs?
Yeah.
70
00:04:09,350 --> 00:04:11,190
You're still gonna
aren't you?
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00:04:11,390 --> 00:04:15,110
Sure. But you're gonna have
to come up with $1300.
72
00:04:15,310 --> 00:04:17,950
It costs that much?
Hm-hm.
73
00:04:18,150 --> 00:04:21,230
When I think of all the stocks
and bonds I could buy with that,
74
00:04:21,430 --> 00:04:22,940
I get goose bumps.
75
00:04:23,140 --> 00:04:25,200
Maybe we should
wait until next year.
76
00:04:25,400 --> 00:04:28,190
No, I want her
still young enough to enjoy it.
77
00:04:28,390 --> 00:04:31,020
[???]
78
00:04:33,200 --> 00:04:35,830
Mom, do you have
a ballpoint pen?
79
00:04:36,030 --> 00:04:38,820
Keith, I gave you three
just last week.
80
00:04:39,020 --> 00:04:42,000
I know. It's those
They keep stealing them.
81
00:04:42,200 --> 00:04:43,800
DANNY:
their own pens?
82
00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:46,190
KEITH: Of course they can.
they steal yours?
83
00:04:46,390 --> 00:04:50,960
Because he might have
with his actual hands.
84
00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:53,080
That's cute, Laurie.
Very cute.
85
00:04:53,280 --> 00:04:54,860
I don't get it.
86
00:04:55,060 --> 00:04:57,000
Your brother enjoys
the reputation
87
00:04:57,200 --> 00:04:58,920
of being a very
romantic figure, Danny.
88
00:04:59,120 --> 00:05:01,200
Although he's too
embarrassed to admit it.
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00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:02,970
DANNY:
his ballpoints?
90
00:05:03,170 --> 00:05:05,190
Oh, it's not only
his ballpoints.
91
00:05:05,390 --> 00:05:08,910
It's anything personal
this romantic figure owns.
92
00:05:09,110 --> 00:05:11,190
Is she kidding?
Weird but true.
93
00:05:13,110 --> 00:05:15,020
Interesting.
94
00:05:15,220 --> 00:05:17,000
[???]
95
00:05:21,070 --> 00:05:22,230
What'd you wanna
see me about?
96
00:05:22,430 --> 00:05:23,930
There's
a whole untapped market
97
00:05:24,130 --> 00:05:26,160
of sex-starved
teenyboppers out there.
98
00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:27,850
This is our big break.
99
00:05:28,050 --> 00:05:30,880
I'm not sure yet
whether I even like girls.
100
00:05:31,080 --> 00:05:33,220
I mean to get the money
for Mom's fur coat.
101
00:05:33,420 --> 00:05:37,040
Don't you see? This is exactly
the business opportunity
102
00:05:37,240 --> 00:05:38,940
we've been waiting for.
It is?
103
00:05:39,140 --> 00:05:42,100
Yeah. First we gotta
steal Keith's toothbrush.
104
00:05:42,300 --> 00:05:44,020
Why?
steal his ballpoints,
105
00:05:44,220 --> 00:05:46,230
they'll pay money
for his toothbrush.
106
00:05:46,430 --> 00:05:48,800
Who'd buy
a used toothbrush?
107
00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:50,870
Well, we can soon find out.
108
00:05:51,070 --> 00:05:54,100
First we'll get
and we'll test-market them.
109
00:05:54,300 --> 00:05:56,100
What sort of items?
110
00:05:56,300 --> 00:05:58,940
As personal as possible.
111
00:05:59,140 --> 00:06:01,840
Do you have a toothbrush?
I seem to have lost mine.
112
00:06:02,040 --> 00:06:03,880
I'll put one in the bathroom.
Thanks.
113
00:06:04,080 --> 00:06:05,800
Keith, do you want
the rest of your pickle?
114
00:06:06,000 --> 00:06:07,120
Uh-huh.
You're not eating it.
115
00:06:07,320 --> 00:06:09,000
I'm going to.
116
00:06:09,200 --> 00:06:11,900
DANNY:
It's just lying there.
117
00:06:12,100 --> 00:06:13,030
Danny,
if you want a pickle,
118
00:06:13,230 --> 00:06:15,160
there's a whole jar full
in the cupboard.
119
00:06:15,360 --> 00:06:17,050
No, thanks.
I don't like pickles.
120
00:06:19,100 --> 00:06:22,040
KEITH: Is there any more milk?
SHIRLEY: In the refrigerator.
121
00:06:22,240 --> 00:06:24,020
[???]
122
00:06:37,220 --> 00:06:40,050
Danny,
did you eat my pickle?
123
00:06:40,250 --> 00:06:40,890
No.
124
00:06:41,090 --> 00:06:42,850
Come on, Danny,
125
00:06:43,050 --> 00:06:45,050
you've had your eye on my pickle
ever since you came in here.
126
00:06:45,250 --> 00:06:46,140
How do you know
you didn't eat it?
127
00:06:46,340 --> 00:06:48,000
Because I'm not that
absent-minded.
128
00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:50,090
Then how come you lost
your toothbrush?
129
00:06:50,290 --> 00:06:51,000
Mom?
130
00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:53,890
Danny,
did you eat his pickle?
131
00:06:54,090 --> 00:06:56,880
No, Mom,
I didn't eat his pickle.
132
00:06:57,080 --> 00:06:59,230
Keith, you must've eaten it.
You just don't remember.
133
00:06:59,430 --> 00:07:02,010
Mom, how could I have forgotten
something like that?
134
00:07:02,210 --> 00:07:04,120
Is it really
that important?
135
00:07:04,320 --> 00:07:08,050
My whole mouth was
all ready for that pickle.
136
00:07:08,250 --> 00:07:10,200
[???]
137
00:07:17,170 --> 00:07:18,870
Psst!
138
00:07:19,070 --> 00:07:20,230
Wanna buy
Keith Partridge's comb?
139
00:07:20,430 --> 00:07:22,860
Are you kidding?
No. I'm his brother.
140
00:07:23,060 --> 00:07:25,160
I've got other
personal stuff of his too.
141
00:07:25,360 --> 00:07:26,900
Look.
142
00:07:27,100 --> 00:07:29,100
Wow. Let's see the comb.
143
00:07:31,050 --> 00:07:34,050
How much?
Seventy-five cents.
144
00:07:37,050 --> 00:07:38,160
There you go.
145
00:07:41,020 --> 00:07:43,230
Take your time.
Browse if you like.
146
00:07:43,430 --> 00:07:46,070
GIRL:
Where'd you get it?
147
00:07:48,170 --> 00:07:51,090
[CHATTERING]
148
00:07:56,160 --> 00:07:59,190
[???]
149
00:08:06,100 --> 00:08:08,910
Well, I guess they're
me seriously now.
150
00:08:09,110 --> 00:08:12,040
I've just given them
a $19.00 deposit.
151
00:08:12,240 --> 00:08:15,880
That means $2581
left to go.
152
00:08:16,080 --> 00:08:17,810
Do you think
we can do it?
153
00:08:18,010 --> 00:08:19,830
Sure. You didn't see
those girls.
154
00:08:20,030 --> 00:08:23,070
Hundreds came running at me,
screaming and yelling.
155
00:08:23,270 --> 00:08:25,130
Gosh. Were you scared?
156
00:08:25,330 --> 00:08:26,830
No. I loved it.
157
00:08:27,030 --> 00:08:29,000
You know, I've never
been attacked by a herd
158
00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:31,150
of stampeding
I sold everything.
159
00:08:31,350 --> 00:08:32,830
That's great.
160
00:08:33,030 --> 00:08:34,180
So, what do we do now?
161
00:08:34,380 --> 00:08:37,160
We get enough stuff
to hold a gigantic auction.
162
00:08:37,360 --> 00:08:40,130
Then we can make a killing
in one crack.
163
00:08:40,330 --> 00:08:42,040
So, what's next?
164
00:08:42,240 --> 00:08:45,000
We accumulate stock.
165
00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:46,220
[???]
166
00:10:00,200 --> 00:10:04,860
Laurie, has Keith
with a girl lately?
167
00:10:05,060 --> 00:10:08,070
How should I know?
I'm only his sister.
168
00:10:08,270 --> 00:10:10,880
Sometimes he tells you
tells me.
169
00:10:11,080 --> 00:10:14,000
Haven't you noticed
he's been acting strange?
170
00:10:14,200 --> 00:10:15,840
He's been acting
strange for years.
171
00:10:16,040 --> 00:10:17,220
He keeps losing things.
172
00:10:17,420 --> 00:10:19,980
He's always been that way.
173
00:10:20,180 --> 00:10:24,810
Remember the time he lost
house apart looking for it?
174
00:10:25,010 --> 00:10:29,060
He looked everywhere
wanted to call the police.
175
00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:33,220
Okay, that does it.
Let's call the police.
176
00:10:33,420 --> 00:10:36,180
What? Why?
is missing.
177
00:10:38,060 --> 00:10:39,800
Keith, calm down.
178
00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:42,210
It probably just slipped off
when it was being laundered.
179
00:10:42,410 --> 00:10:45,830
It's not only the belt.
and my sock
180
00:10:46,030 --> 00:10:47,880
and the shoelaces
and the shirt buttons
181
00:10:48,080 --> 00:10:50,060
and the sheet music
and my running shoe.
182
00:10:50,260 --> 00:10:52,140
Gee, sounds like a case
for the Mod Squad.
183
00:10:52,340 --> 00:10:56,150
It's not funny. Somebody's out
to drive me crazy.
184
00:10:56,350 --> 00:10:59,110
It all started
when I lost my pickle.
185
00:10:59,310 --> 00:11:02,910
Well, then, maybe we
of Missing Vegetables.
186
00:11:03,110 --> 00:11:05,210
Do you know
how silly you sound?
187
00:11:05,410 --> 00:11:09,010
You see?
It's working.
188
00:11:09,210 --> 00:11:09,950
[???]
189
00:11:10,150 --> 00:11:12,070
CHRIS:
Why couldn't we just buy
190
00:11:12,270 --> 00:11:14,820
some toothbrushes
and say Keith used them?
191
00:11:15,020 --> 00:11:17,170
Are you kidding? Do you want
Ralph Nader on our backs?
192
00:11:17,370 --> 00:11:21,100
No. But I think Keith's
beginning to suspect.
193
00:11:21,300 --> 00:11:23,860
He's starting to look
funny at me.
194
00:11:24,060 --> 00:11:26,090
He's starting to look
funny at everyone.
195
00:11:26,290 --> 00:11:29,150
Anyway, all we need
is one more thing.
196
00:11:29,350 --> 00:11:31,950
Something sensational
and sure-fire
197
00:11:32,150 --> 00:11:34,190
that will attract
people to the auction.
198
00:11:34,390 --> 00:11:37,040
Something really personal.
199
00:11:37,240 --> 00:11:40,160
How about if
we steal his bed?
200
00:11:40,360 --> 00:11:43,090
No, I think
he'd miss that.
201
00:11:43,290 --> 00:11:45,900
I've got it!
What?
202
00:11:46,100 --> 00:11:48,040
I'll give you a hint.
203
00:11:48,240 --> 00:11:50,900
It's very personal,
it's brown,
204
00:11:51,100 --> 00:11:53,210
and girls would love to
run their fingers through it.
205
00:11:53,410 --> 00:11:55,180
[???]
206
00:12:49,230 --> 00:12:52,030
Okay. Be sure to put
in each envelope.
207
00:12:52,230 --> 00:12:54,000
We want them to get
their money's worth.
208
00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:56,210
Are we gonna hold
the auction tomorrow, Danny?
209
00:12:56,410 --> 00:12:58,820
Yep. I just
wish we had time
210
00:12:59,020 --> 00:13:01,040
to get out a line
of lockets to go with the hair.
211
00:13:01,240 --> 00:13:03,130
Then we'd really clean up.
212
00:13:05,190 --> 00:13:07,040
[???]
213
00:13:11,050 --> 00:13:12,000
What's Keith gonna do
214
00:13:12,200 --> 00:13:14,060
when he finds that
big hole in his head?
215
00:13:14,260 --> 00:13:15,150
He won't notice.
216
00:13:15,350 --> 00:13:17,940
He's gotta miss
36 envelopes of hair.
217
00:13:18,140 --> 00:13:19,890
I took it all
from the back.
218
00:13:20,090 --> 00:13:22,150
He doesn't have eyes
in the back of his head.
219
00:13:22,350 --> 00:13:25,090
[???]
220
00:13:31,170 --> 00:13:32,960
[SCREAMING]
221
00:13:33,160 --> 00:13:34,890
What is it?
222
00:13:35,090 --> 00:13:36,950
KEITH:
I'm bald as a bumper.
223
00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:39,150
What?
I think I've caught something.
224
00:13:39,350 --> 00:13:42,020
Look at the bald spot
Let me see.
225
00:13:42,220 --> 00:13:45,090
It's an awfully neat circle
to be a disease.
226
00:13:45,290 --> 00:13:47,840
It looks like
away with scissors.
227
00:13:48,040 --> 00:13:49,890
You mean someone's
stolen my hair?
228
00:13:50,090 --> 00:13:53,020
Now will you believe somebody's
out to get me? Look at my hair!
229
00:13:53,220 --> 00:13:54,030
Keith, Keith,
calm down.
230
00:13:54,230 --> 00:13:56,230
Calm down?
in the back of my head.
231
00:13:56,430 --> 00:13:59,100
There has to be
a logical explanation for this.
232
00:13:59,300 --> 00:14:02,230
Mom, you're not gonna
tell me I've misplaced it.
233
00:14:04,100 --> 00:14:06,820
[???]
234
00:14:07,020 --> 00:14:10,190
Okay, the coast is clear.
DANNY: Okay.
235
00:14:10,390 --> 00:14:13,230
[???]
236
00:14:21,140 --> 00:14:22,020
Hi.
237
00:14:22,220 --> 00:14:25,120
Hi. Where you going
with the wagon?
238
00:14:25,320 --> 00:14:27,020
What wagon?
239
00:14:28,040 --> 00:14:29,070
Oh.
240
00:14:30,140 --> 00:14:31,200
Oh, we're going
to school.
241
00:14:31,400 --> 00:14:32,930
What's in it?
242
00:14:33,130 --> 00:14:34,840
Just some junk.
243
00:14:35,040 --> 00:14:37,010
Oh. You recycling it?
244
00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:38,000
In a way.
245
00:14:38,200 --> 00:14:40,020
See you, Mr. Kincaid.
246
00:14:40,220 --> 00:14:43,900
[???]
247
00:14:44,100 --> 00:14:46,800
Look, Keith,
It's no great tragedy.
248
00:14:47,000 --> 00:14:48,160
I mean,
it will grow back.
249
00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:50,120
What am I gonna do
until then?
250
00:14:50,320 --> 00:14:52,900
Well, wear a cap.
251
00:14:53,100 --> 00:14:54,850
Somebody stole it.
252
00:14:55,050 --> 00:14:57,010
It's the Grand Canyon
back there.
253
00:14:57,210 --> 00:14:59,900
Honey,
it's not that bad.
254
00:15:00,100 --> 00:15:02,100
Who'd wanna steal
my hair?
255
00:15:02,300 --> 00:15:05,160
Have you heard
hair thieves in town?
256
00:15:05,360 --> 00:15:08,130
Hi. What's all this
about thieves?
257
00:15:08,330 --> 00:15:12,130
Hi, Reuben.
Keith's hair.
258
00:15:12,330 --> 00:15:14,100
[???]
259
00:15:15,200 --> 00:15:16,930
You don't have
any questions?
260
00:15:17,130 --> 00:15:19,190
Oh, I have a number
of questions.
261
00:15:19,390 --> 00:15:23,140
I just can't make up my mind
which one to ask first.
262
00:15:23,340 --> 00:15:24,980
[???]
263
00:15:25,180 --> 00:15:29,080
Keith, have you had a fight
with Chris or Danny lately?
264
00:15:29,280 --> 00:15:32,970
You think it was Danny?
Mm. Just a hunch.
265
00:15:33,170 --> 00:15:35,920
I hate to say this, Mom,
but it doesn't sound like him.
266
00:15:36,120 --> 00:15:38,230
I mean, he's devious,
but he's not spiteful.
267
00:15:38,430 --> 00:15:42,810
I know, but he's been acting
awfully innocent lately.
268
00:15:43,010 --> 00:15:43,920
[PHONE RINGING]
269
00:15:44,120 --> 00:15:46,220
Would you get that, Reuben?
Sure.
270
00:15:48,100 --> 00:15:50,940
Hello? No, he's
not here right now.
271
00:15:51,140 --> 00:15:53,090
Would you like
to leave a message?
272
00:15:55,150 --> 00:15:57,820
Yes.
Yes, I'll ask him
273
00:15:58,020 --> 00:16:01,040
to get back
to you on that. Mm-mm.
274
00:16:02,130 --> 00:16:04,000
[???]
275
00:16:04,200 --> 00:16:05,950
Oh, that was for Danny.
276
00:16:06,150 --> 00:16:09,150
Somebody wanted to know if
he still wants a mink coat.
277
00:16:11,050 --> 00:16:14,000
What would Danny want
with a mink coat?
278
00:16:14,200 --> 00:16:17,010
It's probably a phase.
He'll grow out of it.
279
00:16:17,210 --> 00:16:19,020
That makes about
as much sense
280
00:16:19,220 --> 00:16:22,080
as everything else that's
been going on around here.
281
00:16:22,280 --> 00:16:25,030
It's beginning to make
a lot of sense to me.
282
00:16:25,230 --> 00:16:27,170
Where is Danny, anyway?
283
00:16:27,370 --> 00:16:30,000
Now, that is
a question I can answer.
284
00:16:30,200 --> 00:16:32,010
I have here a sock
actually worn
285
00:16:32,210 --> 00:16:34,850
by your favorite sex symbol,
Keith Partridge.
286
00:16:35,050 --> 00:16:36,940
What am I bid?
Do I hear 50 cents?
287
00:16:37,140 --> 00:16:39,170
GIRL 1: Fifty.
DANNY: Okay, I have 50.
288
00:16:39,370 --> 00:16:41,940
Do I hear 75 cents
Keith Partridge sock?
289
00:16:42,140 --> 00:16:45,020
GIRL 2: Seventy-five cents.
DANNY: Okay, 75 cents.
290
00:16:45,220 --> 00:16:47,100
Do I hear
80 cents for this genuine
291
00:16:47,300 --> 00:16:48,030
Keith Partridge sock
292
00:16:48,230 --> 00:16:50,130
with a genuine Keith Partridge
hole in the heel?
293
00:16:50,330 --> 00:16:52,910
GIRL 3: Eighty.
He's selling my sock.
294
00:16:53,110 --> 00:16:54,890
One dollar.
Do I hear one dollar
295
00:16:55,090 --> 00:16:57,150
for this actual favorite sock
of a national singing idol?
296
00:16:57,350 --> 00:17:00,930
GIRL 4: A dollar.
Going, going, gone.
297
00:17:01,130 --> 00:17:03,860
Sold to the young lady
with the braces.
298
00:17:04,060 --> 00:17:06,150
There you go.
I'm sure you're gonna get
299
00:17:06,350 --> 00:17:08,110
a lot of enjoyment
from that sock.
300
00:17:08,310 --> 00:17:10,180
Now, this next-- Oh.
301
00:17:10,380 --> 00:17:12,980
Danny. Chris.
302
00:17:13,180 --> 00:17:16,200
I want you to stop this
that money you've taken.
303
00:17:16,400 --> 00:17:19,950
GIRLS: Aw!
You can't do that.
304
00:17:20,150 --> 00:17:22,800
Mom, why? They're really
snapping the stuff up.
305
00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:25,110
It isn't fair
to take advantage of people.
306
00:17:25,310 --> 00:17:28,800
Danny said we're only
giving the public what it wants.
307
00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:30,120
That's my pickle.
308
00:17:31,180 --> 00:17:33,020
It's Keith!
309
00:17:35,080 --> 00:17:38,020
Look, Danny, I'm not
of ethics with you now.
310
00:17:38,220 --> 00:17:40,040
Just do as I say.
311
00:17:40,240 --> 00:17:44,230
Okay. I'm sorry,
the auction's ended.
312
00:17:44,430 --> 00:17:45,980
GIRLS:
Aw...
313
00:17:46,180 --> 00:17:47,910
GIRL 5:
It just started.
314
00:17:48,110 --> 00:17:50,230
Come on, they're really
looking forward to this.
315
00:17:50,430 --> 00:17:52,160
You should have thought
of that sooner.
316
00:17:52,360 --> 00:17:54,830
Mrs. Partridge,
I rode my bike
317
00:17:55,030 --> 00:17:56,810
all the way across town
to get here.
318
00:17:57,010 --> 00:17:59,140
Couldn't you let Danny
sell just one more thing?
319
00:17:59,340 --> 00:18:02,010
GIRLS:
Yeah!
320
00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:07,060
Kids, I'm very sorry.
321
00:18:07,260 --> 00:18:10,840
But Danny had no right
from Keith.
322
00:18:11,040 --> 00:18:13,800
I can't let him
sell something that isn't his.
323
00:18:14,000 --> 00:18:16,190
Boy, all the way
across town for nothing.
324
00:18:20,070 --> 00:18:22,080
Oh, they're really
disappointed, Mom.
325
00:18:22,280 --> 00:18:24,120
And they also
have us surrounded.
326
00:18:29,050 --> 00:18:31,170
How about a song?
GIRLS: Yeah!
327
00:18:34,120 --> 00:18:38,050
Well, we could try
that new song that Keith wrote.
328
00:18:38,250 --> 00:18:40,890
GIRLS:
Yeah!
329
00:18:41,090 --> 00:18:45,050
Little treat, as an encore,
I'm gonna beat Danny up.
330
00:18:45,250 --> 00:18:46,800
Not a good idea, Keith.
331
00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:49,100
You should always
leave the audience wanting more.
332
00:18:49,300 --> 00:18:51,210
[PIANO PLAYING]
333
00:18:56,050 --> 00:18:59,080
[SINGING "EVERY
LITTLE BIT O' YOU"]
334
00:21:06,180 --> 00:21:08,010
[???]
335
00:21:08,210 --> 00:21:10,030
Keith?
336
00:21:10,230 --> 00:21:11,900
Chris and Danny
have something
337
00:21:12,100 --> 00:21:14,130
they wanna say to you.
Right, boys?
338
00:21:16,020 --> 00:21:17,900
We just wanna say
we're sorry.
339
00:21:18,100 --> 00:21:20,180
Yeah, we want you to know
it was nothing personal.
340
00:21:20,380 --> 00:21:24,040
Nothing personal?
You stole the hair from my head.
341
00:21:24,240 --> 00:21:25,900
Yeah, well,
342
00:21:26,100 --> 00:21:28,140
we realize now that stealing
the hair from your head
343
00:21:28,340 --> 00:21:30,210
was a definite invasion
of privacy.
344
00:21:30,410 --> 00:21:33,800
Danny, I felt like I was
in the middle of Gaslight.
345
00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:36,080
Didn't you know you were
driving me bananas?
346
00:21:36,280 --> 00:21:37,930
I guess not.
347
00:21:38,130 --> 00:21:39,960
But you have
to understand, Keith,
348
00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:43,150
you're dealing with a couple
of very immature minds.
349
00:21:43,350 --> 00:21:44,880
[???]
350
00:21:45,080 --> 00:21:47,120
They brought back
all the things they took.
351
00:21:48,220 --> 00:21:50,230
Except for the stuff
we sold.
352
00:21:50,430 --> 00:21:52,860
Yeah, and there's
in the garage,
353
00:21:53,060 --> 00:21:55,170
and it's too big
for us to bring up alone.
354
00:21:55,370 --> 00:21:56,960
KEITH:
Well,
355
00:21:57,160 --> 00:22:01,060
I guess there was
no real harm done.
356
00:22:04,150 --> 00:22:06,190
You stole my bed.
357
00:22:06,390 --> 00:22:09,100
I told you
he'd miss it.
358
00:22:09,300 --> 00:22:12,010
[???]
359
00:22:17,030 --> 00:22:19,010
Shirley, this is
from Tracy and me.
360
00:22:19,210 --> 00:22:21,230
Oh, thank you, Reuben.
Happy birthday.
361
00:22:21,430 --> 00:22:23,230
Thank you.
362
00:22:28,020 --> 00:22:30,810
Oh. Isn't that pretty?
363
00:22:31,010 --> 00:22:33,130
Open it up.
My present's inside.
364
00:22:37,120 --> 00:22:39,140
Just what
I've always wanted.
365
00:22:39,340 --> 00:22:41,840
A picture
of the Cookie Monster.
366
00:22:42,040 --> 00:22:43,170
Thank you, darling.
367
00:22:43,370 --> 00:22:45,980
This is from Danny
and me.
368
00:22:46,180 --> 00:22:50,080
Happy birthday, Mom.
what this could be.
369
00:22:50,280 --> 00:22:52,070
It's a mink.
A mink?
370
00:23:00,140 --> 00:23:01,890
Oh.
371
00:23:02,090 --> 00:23:04,030
DANNY:
rabbit's foot.
372
00:23:04,230 --> 00:23:07,220
SHIRLEY:
with me wherever I go.
373
00:23:07,420 --> 00:23:10,870
Thank you, boys.
374
00:23:11,070 --> 00:23:13,160
We're sorry we couldn't
get you the mink coat.
375
00:23:13,360 --> 00:23:16,200
Well, I think I'm a little young
for a mink coat, anyway.
376
00:23:16,400 --> 00:23:18,090
Do you have to be
a certain age?
377
00:23:19,140 --> 00:23:21,030
Well, look at it this way.
378
00:23:21,230 --> 00:23:23,020
If I got a mink coat now,
379
00:23:23,220 --> 00:23:26,030
I wouldn't have anything
in my old age.
380
00:23:26,230 --> 00:23:27,810
Maybe she's right.
381
00:23:28,010 --> 00:23:29,140
We better wait
a couple more years.
382
00:23:34,040 --> 00:23:37,180
Here, Mom. Happy birthday.
Oh, thank you, Keith.
383
00:23:40,100 --> 00:23:41,850
Oh, Keith.
384
00:23:42,050 --> 00:23:45,120
That's just lovely.
I really like it.
385
00:23:45,320 --> 00:23:47,040
That's not bad taste.
386
00:23:48,060 --> 00:23:49,130
For a guy with no taste.
387
00:23:53,230 --> 00:23:55,930
What's wrong?
size or something?
388
00:23:56,130 --> 00:24:00,230
Well, I hate to look
a gift horse in the mouth,
389
00:24:00,430 --> 00:24:03,030
but it looks
very expensive.
390
00:24:03,230 --> 00:24:05,200
You never seem
to have any money.
391
00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:08,110
Yeah, where did you
get the money, Keith?
392
00:24:08,310 --> 00:24:09,870
Ah, it was easy.
393
00:24:10,070 --> 00:24:12,130
I just got
a pair of scissors
394
00:24:12,330 --> 00:24:15,050
and I took off about
that much here...
395
00:24:15,250 --> 00:24:17,120
[LAUGHING]
396
00:24:17,320 --> 00:24:19,100
[???]
397
00:24:24,040 --> 00:24:26,070
[???]
26525
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