All language subtitles for Gomer Pyle U S M C S05E30 Goodbye Camp Handerson Hello Sergeant Carter 1080p BluRay FLAC2 0 H 264-BTN_track5_[eng]

[marching band plays]

[male announcer] Gomer Pyle - USMC.

Starring Jim Nabors as Gomer Pyle.

Also starring Frank Sutton
as Sergeant Carter.

Gomer, what are you doing?
What's going on?

Oh, my goodness.
The sergeant's not with you, is he?

No, but he'll be back in a little while.
What is this?

Well, I have to keep working
while I explain.

I knew you two were going to be at
headquarters at a meeting all morning.

So I thought I'd sneak in here and
finish this paint job before you got back.

Why, Gomer? Why are you doing this?

- It's our anniversary.
- Huh?

Me and the sergeant. It's our anniversary.

Exactly five years ago today, at 11 :00,
I met Sergeant Carter,

and at 11 :05 he called me a knucklehead
for the first time.

Of course, that was just
to make me a better Marine.

What's all the painting?

Well, this is
my anniversary present to him.

I thought he'd appreciate a paint job
a lot more than a gift from the PX.

I was going to get him a book,
but he's already got one.

Do explain that to the sarge when
he comes in here and takes one sniff.

Him and his sensitive smelter.

Well, paint's a real nice smell, Duke.

It's one of my favorites,
next to gasoline and new tennis shoes.

Okay, well, finish up
and get out of here before he gets back.

Well, I'm almost through now, Duke.

But I would like to stick around and see
the look on Sergeant Carter's face.

He gets a look on his face
when he's surprised.

His eyes get real beady
and his teeth stick out real big.

Looks just like a happy beaver.

Don't count on it too much.

This paint job may not be
just what he's always wanted.

Oh, I know the sergeant, Duke.

He knows a gift from the heart
when he sees one.

He'll say something real nice,

- you just watch.
- [door opens]

What stinks?

Surprise, surprise, surprise!

- Huh?
- From me to you, Sergeant.

A paint job done entirely by me
to help celebrate five years

of our association together
in the United States Marine Corps.

Happy anniversary,
and may it help to brighten your day.

- Who asked you?
- Huh?

Who asked you, Pyle?

Who asked you to come in here
stinking up the place?

But I was...

Did you get an authorization for this?

No. Of course not.

You know the only time I let 'em
come in here and paint

is when I'm away on leave.

That's because I can't stand
the smell of the stuff.

- I'm sorry, Sergeant.
- You're sorry?

Everything here
is gonna smell like paint for days.

I'm going to have to go over to Bunny's
with paint breath, and you're sorry?

I'll see about getting
these things out of here.

Good.

Sergeant!

Pyle, I don't want any conversation
with you.

I just want you and your paint buckets
out of here. I want them out of here now!

- But there's something I ought to tell...
- Out, Pyle!

- Slater, is there any coffee?
- Yeah. You want some?

No, I'll get it myself.

What is this?

That was what
I was going to tell you, Sergeant.

I just shellacked your chair.

I was going to put a Wet Paint sign
on all the things that were still wet.

But I never did get around to it.

Slater!

[tearing]

- Out!
- Sergeant?

Get out of here, Pyle.
Get out of here and get out of here fast!

Do you hear me, Pyle?

You have never been anything
but trouble to me

since the first day I laid eyes on you.
You're like a thorn in my side.

I don't know from one day to the next

what stupid, lame-brained stunt
you're going to pull.

Now get out of here.
And get out of this office.

Get out of my life.
Once and for all, get out!

Out, out, out, out, out!

- Hi, Sarge.
- Hello, Slater.

What's new up at headquarters?

Not much, except that you may
have established a new record

- when it comes to transfers.
- What are you talking about?

The transfer for Pyle.
It was like you rubbed a magic lamp.

He's practically on his way
across the country to Camp Lejeune.

Don't make jokes, Slater.

You know people can get heart attacks
from jokes like that?

Did you ever read about the guy
that was told in a joke

that he won the sweepstakes?
It was too much from him.

He dropped dead. So don't fool around.

I'm not kidding, Sarge. Here it is.

Huh?

It's true.

- It's really true.
- How did you manage it so fast?

- Did you talk to the colonel?
- What colonel?

I didn't talk to anybody.
This is the first I've heard of it.

- But how did it happen?
- I don't know.

But let's get inside fast.

Huh?

I don't think the men
should see their sergeant

laughing and crying at the same time.

[Carter chuckles]

Don't touch it!
I don't want anything to happen to it.

Sergeant Persky, please.

Oh, Bill? This is Vince.

Say, I'm calling about this transfer
for Gomer Pyle.

Do you know anything about it?

I see.

Okie-dokie, Billy boy. [chuckles]

Uh? Oh, I don't know.
Maybe it's because it's Friday.

I'm always happy on Fridays.

See ya, buddy.

- What did he say?
- Huh?

He don't know.
He just came from the colonel's office.

Sarge... I know
this may be a dumb question,

but are you really and truly that glad
to be getting rid of Gomer?

Let me say yes to both them remarks.

Yes, it is a dumb question.

Yes, I am really and truly that glad
to be getting rid of him.

Are you kidding, Slater?

Do you have any idea
how many times over the last five years

I should have gotten rid of Pyle
and didn't? Any idea at all?

- Well, I know he's fouled up at times.
- Fouled up?

He's a one-man disaster area.

Take for example,
the time we were on sea maneuvers.

Do you remember how we were supposed
to board that rubber raft

- and make a landing on the beach?
- Sure I remember, Sarge. I was there.

No. You don't remember too good.

I'll refresh your memory.

We were on our way down the cargo net...

All we had to do was to board
that rubber raft and row for the beach.

Easy does it, boys.

- Well, what are you doing, Pyle?
- Just looking for a place to sit.

- Well, find it and sit.
- Yes, sir.

All right, get the oars out.

[creaking]

What are you doing now, Pyle?

I was going to put my bayonet
on the rifle.

I want to be ready when we hit the beach.

There's plenty of time for that later.
Put it back.

Yes, sir.

[air hisses]

[all laugh]

[officer on ship] Hey, did you see? Hey, be careful!

Those things got points on them!
Didn't they tell you about that?

Hey, watch out!
It gets a little deep around here!

Watch out for the sharks, Sergeant!

Sergeant.

I did want to tell you how sorry I am.
And I am sorry.

But it was the funniest thing the way
that bayonet just stuck into that raft.

Yeah, wasn't it, though?
Look how I'm still laughing.

I can't blame you one bit for being angry.
No, sir.

Will you knock it off, Pyle,
and start changing?

I don't want to hear no more
about that bayonet or that raft.

- Now, get changed.
- Right, Sergeant.

Boy, Sergeant, you know that water
sure is salty, ain't it?

Change, change!

Pyle, get your foot off my head!

Whatever you do, Pyle,
don't touch that bayonet.

Just leave it alone.

Oh, don't worry, Sergeant.

There ain't a chance in the world
of that happening again.

You see, I put my bayonet
over here by my flare gun, and it being...

[air hisses]

[all laugh]

[officer on ship] Hey, that's live ammunition!

Not supposed to use that, Sergeant!

Hey! We're running out of boats, fellas!

I knew it might be a bit of a problem
making it to the beach.

But I didn't think there'd be
so much trouble getting started.

- I'm sorry, sir.
- We're losing precious time.

- How fast can we get another boat?
- Just a few minutes, sir.

I trust this will be
the last boat necessary.

Don't worry, sir. We'll make it this time.

- Let's hope so.
- Aye, aye, sir.

Let's get below!

Get another boat from the starboard side,
on the double.

Yeah, once again. Let's go.

Well, I'm sure glad I didn't take a shower
this morning. Aren't you?

I sure am sorry, Sergeant.

But I had no idea that
that safety was off.

- And I just...
- I'll get you for this, Pyle.

If it takes the rest of my days,
I'll get you for this.

But I didn't do them things on purpose.

- I was just trying to...
- Don't talk, Pyle.

- I don't want to hear your voice.
- Yes, Sergeant.

I said I didn't want to hear your voice!
Just change. Change!

Yes, Sergeant.

I said don't talk, change!

Sergeant, Grandma Pyle used to always say,

"To err is human. To forgive, divine."

So if you just forgive me this time...

Oh, I'll forgive you, all right.

You want to know how?

You see this shirt?

Well, that's you.

- Well, come on, let's go.
- Gomer isn't here yet, Sarge.

I said, let's go. Move, move, move, move!

Come on, move it!

All right. Start rowing.

But Sergeant,
aren't we going to wait for Gomer?

I can't hear a word you're saying.

Hey, Sergeant. Wait for me!

Row, row, row, row!

Row! Row!

Did you see that, fellas?

Right...

[all laugh]

Where did I fail?

Where did I fail?

Where?

Huh? Do you remember that?

Why I didn't get rid of him
then and there, I'll never know.

Get me the colonel's office.

Am I glad to get rid of him!

Slater, this is like a dream come true.

You wait...

Hello, Sergeant Denough?

This is Sergeant Carter here.

Say, I'm calling about this transfer
for Gomer Pyle.

Would you happen to know
where it originated?

Oh.

I didn't know that.

I see.

Thanks, Denough.

[Slater] Where did it come from?

- Huh?
- The transfer. Where did it come from?

There was an urgent request
from the chaplain's office.

It was sent to the colonel,
and he approved it.

The chaplain's office?
How come it came from there?

Because it came from Pyle.

Pyle made the urgent request.

Sarge, you know why I think
Gomer put in for a transfer?

I mean, after all,
you've yelled at him before.

I don't know, Slater, and I don't care.

I think maybe it was because
this was such a special day for him.

You how sentimental he is.

Like a kid
wanting to surprise his old man.

Yeah, well,
I sure ain't going to worry about it.

He wants to go, let him go.
The sooner the better.

But Sarge, the way he felt
about you personally.

You were always the main reason he wanted
to stay in this platoon. What else?

The way he felt about me personally?

You want to hear about the times
he loused up my personal life too?

You remember how he took care of my car
that time I went up to San Francisco

to bring back that AWOL Marine?

- Yeah, I remember.
- Yeah.

I left him in charge of my car.

And it was stolen
right out from under his stupid nose.

I remember, Sergeant.

Do you remember what happened
when he finally found it?

- I remember...
- Then I'll tell you.

I don't believe it.
I just don't believe it!

This is it. This is the car.

This is Sergeant Carter's car.

Hallelujah.

And it's perfect. It's just perfect.

- I can't believe it!
- You're a lucky man, Pyle.

And all because of you.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

- Duke. I got to call Duke.
- Phone booth over there.

Hello? Camp Henderson?

I'd like to speak to Private First Class
Duke Slater in B Company, please.

It's an emergency.

Yee-hoo!

Hello, Duke?

It's me, Gomer.

Guess what? Right. We found the car.

Uh-huh.

Yeah, just this minute.

It's way out here
at the far end of the town.

And guess what, Duke?
There ain't a scratch on it.

Ain't that something? There ain't
the teeniest little scratch on it.

Huh? Do you remember that little incident?

I should have thrown him out
right then and there.

- But you didn't.
- No, I didn't, Slater.

And I'm sorry.
But now he's going, and I'm glad.

So knock it off, Slater.
That's the end of the story.

Well, it really isn't, Sarge.

Huh?

Well, there's another part to the story.
And you just...

Well, maybe you forgot about it.

But in all fairness to Gomer,
you just can't forget about it.

What, Slater? Forget what?

Well, take the story
about the sea maneuvers.

I know Gomer goofed real bad
and ruined three rubber rafts.

But don't you remember how
he came through for you in the end?

What?

Well, we were out on submarine patrol

and Gomer swam all the way out to our raft
just to be part of the operation.

Don't you remember how foggy it was?

Did you enjoy your little swim out here?

Sure did.

- You think you can make it back all right?
- Easy.

Well, just swim back to the ship.

Huh?

Pyle, there's an enemy sub
somewhere in this vicinity.

Probably staring at us
at this very minute.

Now, you're a jinx.
So get out of this boat.

- Out, out.
- But Sergeant, I won't...

Sergeant, look!

That's the signal.
We've got to get started.

- Out, Pyle, out, out, out!
- Sergeant, I'm not a jinx.

Honest, I'm not.

And I'll make good
if you just give me the chance.

Out, out, out, out, out, out, out,
out, out, out, out, out, out, out,

out, out, out, out, out, out!

Seems a lot colder
than it did the first time.

Start swimming. You'll warm up.

- Any sign of Gomer, Sergeant?
- What?

Can you spot Gomer anywhere?

That's not what I'm looking for.
I'm looking for a submarine.

[clank]

Shazam!

Sergeant! Sergeant!

Look what I found!

Pyle!

Turn this thing about!

I can't see anything, sir.
It suddenly blacked out.

That's impossible.

Pyle!

Sergeant Carter, this thing was sticking
right up out of the water. What do I do?

- What I do?
- It's a periscope.

He's landed on a periscope.
Hang on, Pyle. Hang on.

It's a submarine. It's right under you.

Golly!

I went and captured up a submarine!

Well? How about that, Sarge?

So what?

It was just one of them lucky breaks
that only happens to fools.

Well, maybe so, but the fact is,
it did happen.

Gomer was responsible for it.

And you got a commendation
for the whole thing.

It was a lucky break. A lucky break!

Okay. But how about the incident
with the car?

- I guess that was a lucky break too?
- Huh?

I'm sorry, Sarge, but you left out
the rest of that story too.

You only remember
how your car got smashed up.

But thanks to Gomer, there was
a happy ending. Don't you remember?

You came back with your AWOL Marine
and there was Gomer waiting to meet you.

- Hey, Sergeant.
- Hello, Pyle.

How was your trip?

- Where's my car?
- Hey, Franklin.

You remember me, Gomer Pyle?
Of course, you might have forgotten.

You haven't been around
too much lately, but, well...

He's not a war hero, Pyle. He was AWOL.
Now, where's my car?

- Where is it?
- Well, it's right over there.

- Where? I don't see my car.
- I know.

That's what I got to explain.
Maybe I'd better start at the beginning.

I don't care where you start. Just start.
Where's my car?

Well, you see,
right after you left yesterday,

I went back to get your car.

But I didn't really go back to your car.

Because when I went back to your car,
your car wasn't there.

What are you trying to tell me?
What is it? Where is my car, huh?

Well, your car was stolen.

Stolen?

- My car was...?
- Wait.

See, I left the keys in it.
But then I went right to the police.

Pyle! Where is my car? Where is it?

Like I said, it's right over there.

- And you know where they found it?
- They found it?

They sure did.
It's parked right on the street.

Right near where they was
tearing this building down.

There wasn't a scratch on it.

And then this big steel ball fell on it
and just smashed your car to smithereens.

- My car?
- But the owner of the construction company

felt so bad about it,
he wanted you to have

this new 1966 car with his compliments.

So like I said, there's your car.

Free? Just like that?

Then you weren't kidding?

This is really my car?

For keeps.

Don't touch it, Pyle!

Oh, boy!

What a stroke of luck.

What a stroke of luck!

What are you trying to prove, Slater?

Well, nothing, Sarge.

Just that there's two sides
to every story.

Just like there's two sides to Gomer,
I guess.

The part that fouls up
and the part that makes up for it.

[knock at door]

Excuse me, Sergeant.

Am I interrupting something?

What do you want, Pyle?

- Excuse me, Duke.
- Sure, Gome.

I might be leaving this afternoon and...

...I wanted to give you something
before I went away.

Huh?

It's... it's an old rabbit's foot

with a $2.50 gold piece attached to it.

I got it a long time ago
from Grandma Pyle.

Well, it's always meant
a whole lot to me, and...

...I'd like you to have it.

Kind of as a going-away present.

Well, that's very nice of you, Pyle.

But look... the person going away
doesn't give presents.

I know it,
but I'd still like you to have it.

No, Pyle. I couldn't take something
that means that much to you.

Please take it, Sergeant.

Maybe it'll help you to have some...
nicer memories of me,

and it'll bring you good luck, and...

...that's what I'd like you to have,
is good luck.

Bye, Sergeant. Bye, Duke.

Well, I'll see you.

Would you be sure to tell
the other fellers I said goodbye?

Sure. Bye, Gomer.

Oh.

And would you tell whoever gets this bunk

that if they put their pillow way over
to the side and kind of up on the bar,

they can look out and see the Big Dipper.

- Won't you tell them that?
- Yeah, sure, Gomer.

We'll tell them.

So long.

- Oh, Gomer. You're still here. Good.
- Yeah, I was just leaving, Duke.

- I was on my way over to transportation.
- No. They want you up at headquarters.

- Headquarters? Why?
- I don't know.

But you better get up there right away.

Sergeant Carter?

What's the matter, Pyle?

Sergeant, I just came from headquarters.

And I don't know what could have happened,

but something's gone wrong
with my transfer.

What do you mean?

Well, I was supposed to ship out today

and they just told me over at headquarters
that my transfer had been rescinded.

- What?
- Uh-huh.

And I just wanted to tell you
that I didn't do nothing to stop it.

I couldn't have even if I'd wanted to.

So what do you reckon happened, Sergeant?

I don't know, Pyle.
But I'll tell you one thing.

I'm sure going to find out.

Would you mind calling them up?
'Cause I'd kind of like to know too.

Oh, don't worry, Pyle. I'm going to call.

You go back to the barracks
and I'll let you know.

- Oh, I'll call, all right!
- Yes, sir.

- What do you suppose happened, Sarge?
- How should I know? I ain't in Personnel.

You going to call headquarters
and find out?

- Yeah, I'll call.
- You want me to call for you

and find out who canceled the transfer?

- Slater, I said I'd call.
- I'll call for you, Sarge.

Slater, put that phone down
and shut up, will you?

I said, shut up, Slater!

- Hey, Sergeant Carter.
- Hello, Pyle.

I'm shellacking your chair over again.

But this time you notice
I'm doing it outside,

- so you won't be bothered by the smell.
- Good. Good.

It's funny how you don't like the smell
of shellac. It's such a nice smell.

Yeah, well, I guess
I got a little sensitivity in my nose.

You see, I got a deviated septum.

You have?

Well, you'd never know it to look at you.

Yeah, well, I got one.

Sergeant, I want to tell you how very glad
I am to be staying on in the platoon.

- Good.
- I never did want to leave it.

Okay.

But I'd rather leave it
than cause you any unhappiness.

- You know that, don't you, Sergeant?
- Yeah, Pyle.

So I'm gonna make you a promise, Sergeant.

And I'm going to do my best
to live up to it.

What's that?

I'm going to try harder than ever
to do the right thing

and never give you any reason
to be disappointed in me.

Yeah?

I promise.

Give me your hand on that, Pyle,
and I'll know you really mean it.

- Well, I'd like to, Sergeant, but I...
- Come on!

[Carter chuckles]

Okay, Pyle. Let go of my hand.

Well, I can't, Sergeant.
That's what I wanted to tell you.

I've gotten shellac all over it.