All language subtitles for Gomer Pyle U S M C S05E19 Dynamite Diner 1080p BluRay FLAC2 0 H 264-BTN_track5_[eng]

[marching band plays]

[male announcer] Gomer Pyle - USMC.

Starring Jim Nabors as Gomer Pyle.

Also starring Frank Sutton
as Sergeant Carter.

Sure is a good feeling
having money in the bank.

Not everybody can do it.

A savings account, a regular paycheck,
and a bright future ahead of me.

I'm a lucky fella, there's no question.

Well, you think you have enough money left
to take me to the movies?

I can just about manage it.
What would you like to see?

Well, what would you like to see?

- Would you like to see a musical?
- If that's what you want to see.

- Well, I'll see it if you want to see it.
- Well, I'll see it if you want to see it.

Why don't we look in the newspaper
and see what's playing?

We can have some lunch here
while we're looking.

I don't see anybody.
Are you sure it's open?

Well, it don't say it's closed. Come on.

- Not very nice, is it?
- Well, that can fool you.

Sometimes these plain places
have the best food.

Doesn't seem to be anybody here.

Well, maybe there's somebody
in the back or downstairs.

It checks out. The vault's
on the other side of this wall.

Get me a hammer and a drill.

Maybe we should let them know
they have a couple of customers.

Hello! Anybody here?

[shouts] Get some rags!
Just hurry up!

Hurry up!

- What was that?
- Somebody upstairs.

- Didn't you lock the front door?
- I couldn't. I lost the key.

If I locked the door,
I wouldn't be able to get in.

- [Gomer] Hello?
- Just a minute!

Get up there and get rid of them.

- Charley?
- What?

I'm scared.

There's nothing to be scared about.
We rented the place legit.

Just tell them we ain't open,
and get back down here!

- Okay.
- Ah! Give me the rags!

- Are you okay, Charley?
- I'm okay!

Uh, we... we got
a broken water pipe down there.

We'd like to get a little lunch.

Lunch...

Well, uh, we ain't exactly open yet.

We just rented the place this morning.

I'm... I'm awful sorry.

I'd like to serve you lunch,
I really would,

but we don't have no food here yet.

Except for that stuff
I picked up for Charley and me.

Nothing fancy, just eggs and things.

Oh, well, that's fine with me.
Is that all right with you, Lou-Ann?

Well, if it's all right with you.

Fine. Two orders of fried eggs, over easy.

Uh... be right back.

Come on. Let's get started.

They're still there.

I couldn't help it, Charley.

They saw our groceries, and ordered eggs.

Big Marine and his girlfriend.
Nothing I could do.

So make them eggs
and get them out of here.

Okay.

- Charley?
- What now?

How do you make eggs?

Rock Hudson is at the Plaza.

Well, he's always good.

Julie Andrews is at the Uptown.

She's always good.

I must have cracked it too hard.

Eggs can be kind of tricky.

Well, it's a new kind of work for me.

Well, here. Let me give you a hand.

Lou-Ann, why don't you see
if you can't find us a picture.

Well, fine, Gomer. You go right ahead.

- Never was much good in the kitchen.
- Oh, you'll catch on fast.

Eggs ain't no trouble.

First of all, you got to butter the pan
a little bit. You got any butter?

Yeah, in the bag.

Oh, here. Here we go.

- You mind if we use a clean pan?
- No.

It'll be a lot easier.

Let me cut off some butter.

And you put it in the pan there.

Kind of melt it down a little.

- Butter, huh?
- There we go.

Now, the easiest little
tippy-tap will do it.

Hey, that's good!

[chuckles] The more you do this,
the easier it is.

Gee! One-handed!

- You want to try it?
- Well, you think I could?

Oh, sure. Go ahead.

I guess I'm not ready for one-handed yet.

- [laughs]
- There you go. That's real good!

[Gomer] Now, the secret of cooking eggs
is gentle heat,

nice and easy.

You cook them real fast,
they get rubbery.

Oh, yeah.

Any problems?

You didn't tell me about the butter.

Can't you hurry it up? We got three feet
of concrete to dig through.

I told them we was fixing the water pipe,
so the noise won't matter.

- Wasn't that right?
- You done fine.

Now, get them out of here.
That's a two-man job down there.

You think I ought
to nail the front door shut?

- I mean, after they leave.
- No, stupid.

What if they come back?
Then they'll really get suspicious.

- Charley?
- Yeah?

Would you like some fried eggs?
I'm all checked out on them.

- Mm. Those were good, weren't they?
- Sure were.

Best eggs I ever ate.

- You say you're from out of town?
- Just in from Kansas City.

Oh. How long were you there?

Five to ten. I mean, about five years.

Well, I just know you're going
to do real good here.

But if you don't mind my saying so,

you really should stock up
on some more food.

Oh, sure. We're gonna.

But first, we got to get
a little money put together.

Well, why don't you get some
from the bank next door?

What do you mean by that?

Well, you could ask them
for a loan to get started.

- Why don't you go over there?
- No.

We don't have nothing to do
with that bank. Nothing.

Well, it might be helpful.

That way, you could pay a plumber
to do the fixing up downstairs,

and you and your partner
could be up here all the time.

We don't mind doing our own work.

Gomer, maybe we'd better be going.

- How much do we owe you?
- Owe me for what?

Oh, that, uh, I don't know.

Well, how much you been charging?

We haven't been.
We haven't had any customers before.

Do you mean to say that we're your very
first customers in your new business?

That's right. So forget it.

No check. Compliments of the management,

'cause you're the first.

And because we're the first,
we insist on paying,

and we ain't leaving here till we do.

All right. How about a... a dollar?

All right. Must feel good
ringing up your first dollar.

Ringing up?

Oh, yeah. Uh...

[cash register dings]

- Bye!
- Bye!

Bye!

[Charley] Herbie!

It ain't gonna be too easy
for them fellas starting a new business,

just in from out of town
with no friends to help.

No food, no money, and obviously too proud
to ask for a loan from the bank.

- The bank!
- Well, what is it?

Well, you remember
I was telling you how lucky I am?

Well, why shouldn't I help two fellas
who ain't as lucky as I am?

Especially since I was
their first customer.

- You don't mind, do you, Lou-Ann?
- 'Course I don't, Gomer.

I think that's a wonderful idea.

Then I'll just run you home, and then
I'll come back and go to the store.

You are not going to take me home!

Because I want to help, too.

- You mean it?
- Uh-huh!

My, my, my! Can you just imagine how happy
them two fellas are going to be?

[grunting]

Tough going.
It's going to take another 24 hours.

Yeah?

But just think of that juicy payoff
once we get there.

Yeah.

- You know something, Charley?
- What?

The important thing with cooking eggs
is to do it slow.

That's the truth.
Too fast makes them rubbery.

That's the restaurant business for you.
Learn something new every day.

Why don't you learn something
with this hammer?

Sure, Charley.

Maybe we could start with the drill now.

Hey, that's not a bad idea.
Go plug in the cord. We'll try it.

- Surprise, surprise, surprise!
- It's us! We're back!

- Yeah. Uh...
- You can call this just a little loan

to get you started,
and you don't have to pay me back

until business really gets booming.

I just hope these curtains
are going to fit.

They'll be just perfect
for your front window.

That will make a lot of difference
to people passing by.

Outside appearance is very important.

Oh, Gomer, you were right.
These windows do have to be cleaned.

Well, I'll give you a hand.

First of all, though, you put
this stuff away. Here. I'll help you.

Take that one. Got it? There you go.

Oh, by the way,
this goes in the refrigerator.

There you are. See?

What is all this? What? What?

- Food.
- I can see that.

Where did it come from?

[Herbie] The Marine and his girlfriend brought it.

But why, why, why?

They said they wanted to help us
get started in business.

Get started in business?
They're stopping us from business!

We gotta get in that bank
by tomorrow night!

- I know, but we could...
- Look, Herbie.

We got a chance to make a big score here.
You understand?

A real sweet haul.

But we can't do it
with guided tours coming through.

So get rid of them, and right now.
Do you understand?

Hey, Herb, would you mind getting
the inside of the windows, please?

I've gotta take this back.

It's against the law not
to return shopping carts,

and we don't want
to break any laws, do we?

Well, no, of course not,
but listen to me...

You be sure
and get every single corner, now.

[whirring]

[whirring stops]

[clicking]

[clicking]

All right, this has gone far enough!

- You must be Charley.
- That's right, I'm Charley.

What do you mean taking this plug
out of the wall?

Well, I'm sorry.
I didn't know you was using it.

I had to plug in the coffeemaker.
We got us a customer.

I don't care if we got us a cu...

He works over at the bank.

When I was over there, I told them all
they should try this place.

Now, this here is Charley,
the other partner.

- Hi.
- Hi.

You'll be getting a lot
of business from the bank.

You ought to just knock this wall
down here between you.

- What do you mean?
- Wouldn't that be something, though?

Having your own private entrance
to the bank?

[laughter]

Yeah, wouldn't that be something?

Charley here's been having the worst time
with the plumbing downstairs.

- He's been trying to fix it.
- Is that so?

Maybe I can give you a hand.
I'm pretty good at plumbing.

No, no! Don't bother!
They're just a couple of busted valves,

and I got some coming, there's nothing
to do down there at all, nothing.

- Nothing at all.
- Well, in that case,

maybe you can give us a hand up here.

It'd be real nice to have
the place all cleaned up by tonight.

I mean, that is, if you're sure
there's nothing else

- you have to do down in the cellar.
- Oh, no, no, no!

There's nothing to do down there!
I'll be glad to help you mop up.

Well, how about that!
With all of us pitching in,

I'm sure it's gonna come out just
like you fellas was hoping it would.

Well, don't the curtains
just look beautiful?

Oh, they're very nice. And we want
to thank you both for all your help.

Herb and I'll take it from here.
Thank you again.

- Thank you very, very much.
- [Gomer] Well, all right, then.

Well, your sign's wrong-side-out.
It says "closed."

Well, we decided to stay closed
until them pipes get fixed.

Don't want to open to the general public
until everything is ready.

- But...
- Uh, Herb and I are gonna be working

downstairs over the weekend,
so we're gonna stay closed until Monday.

- Well, I guess you know best.
- Yes.

And there's no hurry about paying me back.
Promise me you won't worry about that.

I promise.

Let's get back to work.

Did you ever see two happier fellas?

It was worth every penny,
whether I get it back or not.

It sure looks good. Those curtains
certainly do make a difference.

It's a shame they can't open
till this weekend.

They're gonna lose all
their weekend business.

Some of that food's gonna spoil, too.

I really hate to see
that "closed" sign up there.

Business you lose, you never get back.

Well, it just can't be helped. They got
all that work to do down in the cellar.

Well, you don't suppose...
Lou-Ann, I was just thinking,

there's no picture we're
really dying to see, is there?

Well, no.

And since I have the whole weekend off,
well, I was just thinking...

Gomer, I know just what you're gonna say,
and I think it's a wonderful idea.

You mean you're sure you'd like to do it?

- Well, I would if you would.
- And I would if you would.

Well, you decide.

Well, I say, when doing a good deed,
there's no point in stopping halfway.

[laughs]

- You think we'll make it in time?
- Sure. Tomorrow's Saturday.

We got all day
to get through the concrete.

Then tomorrow night,
we dynamite into the vault.

I hope we haven't burnt out the drill.
It smells funny.

Nah, it can't be the drill,
it's your imagination.

- [sniffing]
- Oh, you smell it, too?

Yeah, but it ain't the drill, it...
it smells more like...

[sniffs] ...bacon frying.

Yeah!

[food sizzling]

Surprise, surprise, surprise!

I just couldn't stand
to see you lose business.

So you go on back down
to the cellar and finish your work.

Lou-Ann's gone to the market
and she'll be back in a minute,

and when she does, we'll take care of
everything up here for the whole weekend.

- [stammering] But...
- Now, don't try to thank us.

This is a lot more fun
than seeing any old movie.

Excuse me, now,
I got to get back to my eggs.

He did say the whole weekend, didn't he?

- Yeah. But maybe...
- We can't waste any more time talking.

- We got to get 'em out of here.
- But how can we?

We'll get them down in the cellar,
and we'll tie them up or something.

This is our chance with the dame gone.

When she gets back, we'll tell her
he had to go back to camp.

Ask him to come downstairs a minute.

- Is this the pipe you mean?
- Yeah, that's right.

Just keep it from moving,
and I'll disconnect it back there.

I really shouldn't stay down here too
long. There ain't nobody upstairs.

Won't take long.

Lou-Ann and I had
a great idea for tomorrow night.

- We thought we'd have a big chicken fry.
- Chicken fry, huh?

Work on that pipe over here, huh?

And I'm inviting a whole platoon
of Marines down here for a supper party.

Gonna fill the whole place
with Marines, huh?

That is, if you don't mind a little noise.

Oh, I-I don't mind the noise.

I mean, real noise,
'cause when them fellas get together,

you can't hear yourself think.
Well, it'll be a real blowout.

Ah! Real blowout, huh?

Hey, that's a great idea!
The more, the merrier.

- Thanks for helping.
- But I didn't do anything.

Believe me, you helped more than you know.

Now, you just go on upstairs
and start organizing the big party.

Well, all right.

- Charley, what was that all about?
- We've been going at this all wrong.

Instead of trying to get rid of him,
we'll use him.

But... but tomorrow night, that's when
we're busting in the bank, ain't it?

Right. And what better cover
than a whole place full of Marines.

Who's gonna get suspicious?

And the best part of it is,

the noise they make'll drown out
the explosion down here.

You mean we're... we're gonna pull off
the job with the joint full of people?

Sure. Tomorrow night there's
gonna be two blowouts here.

One upstairs for laughs,
and one down here...

[kissing] ...for money.

[jazz plays]

- Another order of fried chicken, Gomer.
- Coming right up.

- Isn't this just wonderful?
- It sure is.

Uh, excuse me, please.

[indistinct chatter]

Give me the timer.

I hope it didn't get damp.
That'd ruin it.

No, it works perfect. I checked it.

- [Gomer] Herb? Oh, Herb?
- Yeah?

Can you lend a hand for a minute?

Go on, I'll finish here.

All you do is just roll it up
in the flour like this,

then put it in the basket,
and then put the basket in the grease.

That's all there is to it.
Now you try it.

Well, gee, Gomer, I don't know if I could.

Oh, sure you can.
I've gotta go help with the tables.

We got more people showing up
than we expected.

Oh, I forgot! I got a surprise for you.

- A chef's hat!
- That's right!

- "Herb"!
- [laughs] Put it on.

I got one for Charley, too.

[both laugh]

[laughter, chatter continues]

All set. It goes off at 9:00 sharp.

Good. Try this.

I cooked it myself.

Hey, not bad.

- Charley?
- Yeah?

If you don't mind,
$6.50 out of ten, please?

Sure, sure.

- $6.50 out of ten.
- [register rings]

One, two, three, and there's your change.

[laughter]

Oh, it looks just marvelous.

- It looks pretty good, huh?
- Yeah.

Gomer?

Would you just look at them two,
happy as clams.

Boy, this is a night they'll never forget.

You know, it's just a shame
they're gonna have to do

all of that work down in the cellar.
They're gonna miss all the excitement.

I know what. Why don't I go in the cellar
and work on the pipes,

and they can stay up here
and be in on everything?

[upbeat music plays loudly]

I turned the music up louder
like you told me.

Good, good. Just two minutes to go.

- Come here, I want to show you something.
- [register rings]

Sure having a big night. We're gonna clear
a couple of hundred easy.

Uh, we ought to put part
of this out of sight.

- Some punk going by might get ideas.
- Yeah.

- You can't be too careful these days.
- Yeah.

Charley, how much do we owe you?

Uh, that'll be two bucks apiece.

- Really good chow, fellas.
- Yeah, terrific, man.

- So long, Herb.
- So long.

- So long, Charley.
- See you guys next week.

That's right, see you next week.

What am I saying?
There ain't gonna be no next week.

I almost forgot. These came for you
when you were down in the cellar.

- Flowers?
- For us?

- Aren't they beautiful?
- But who would send...

The bank sent them,
with a card that says:

"Good luck, from your neighbor."
Now, isn't that darling?

Yeah.

How about that!
The bank sent us flowers!

Everybody's being nice to us, ain't they?
And we're making good money.

- Say, Charley?
- What?

Well, don't laugh,

but I almost wish we wasn't gonna do it.

You're a little late.
Quick, cover the noise.

[dishes smashing]

- Well, there go the profits.
- [laughter]

- They never even noticed the explosion.
- Come on.

Oh, we... we'd better go back down
and finish with the pipes.

Oh, you don't have to do that.
Gomer's doing it.

- Gomer's down there?
- Uh-huh.

He went down about ten minutes ago.

He wanted you all to stay up here
and enjoy yourselves.

I'm awful sorry, fellas.

I come down here to fix this pipe,
and it just busted clean off.

I really couldn't help it, though.

And then the water just kept
getting deeper and deeper.

I can't tell you how bad I feel about it.

But I did find the handle
that turns off the water,

so at least it won't leak anymore.

That sure was some party
we had last night, wasn't it?

Did you get the pipes fixed?

Yeah, the plumber came this morning,
all set.

Hey, Herb, what's that
you're making there?

Oh, it's stew. I found this great recipe.

You know, Gomer, uh...

I think Charley and me
are in the restaurant business to stay.

- [Charley] Herbie!
- Oh, excuse me.

This isn't so good.
They've got a customer waiting.

They should be paying
more attention to business.

Well, maybe we were wrong about them.

I know I left the rest of that dynamite
down here, but I can't find it!

- [Gomer] Hey, Herb? Charley?
- Yeah, Gomer?

It was in a little canvas bag!

Oh, are you looking
for that little overnight bag?

- Yeah.
- I took it upstairs

last night after we closed.
I didn't want things getting wet.

Then it's upstairs.

Yeah, I put it on that shelf
over the oven.

Over the oven?

By the way,
you got a customer upstairs waiting.

Nothing to worry about
with them fellas, no, sir.

Did you see the way they hustled off when
I told them they had a customer waiting?

[laughs]