All language subtitles for Gomer Pyle U S M C S02E29 Desk Job for a Sergeant 1080p BluRay FLAC2 0 H 264-BTN_track5_[eng]

[marching band plays]

[male announcer] Gomer Pyle - USMC.

Starring Jim Nabors as Gomer Pyle.

Also starring Frank Sutton
as Sergeant Carter.

["marine corps hymn" plays]

All right, come on, come on,
get them wires connected!

Snap it up! Move, move, move!

Boy, the sergeant sure is setting
a blistering pace today, ain't he?

Blistering is right!

All right, come on.
Pull it in, give our position.

And remember, Pyle,
use the phonetic alphabet.

We are at, uh,

point LT.

But for L, it's Lima, T is Tango.

- You got that, Pyle?
- Yes, sir. Lima Tango.

I remember cause lima's a bean
and tango's the dance.

I don't care how you remember,
just remember!

- Call in.
- Yes, sir.

Hello? This here's Baker Company,
reportin' in at...

A bean? A bean? Oh, yeah. Lima.

A dance? A dance? Begins with T?

We're at Lima Turkey Trot!

We're at Lima Tango. Out!

Tango! Tango!
I don't know why I couldn't remember that.

That's what George Raft used to dance
with Joan Crawford.

They do them low dips at the end!

Pyle, will ya knock it off?

Boyle, call in the men
from the lookout points.

- [groans]
- Sergeant Carter?

- Yes, sir.
- From what I've observed,

you seem to have a good understanding
of our training techniques.

Thank you, sir.

We've been looking for a non-commissioned
officer with combat experience

to help compile training manuals.

- You might be just right for the job.
- Training manuals?

Just a temporary assignment for two weeks.

That's why we're putting it
on a voluntary basis.

We don't wanna take a man who feels he
can't be spared from his present duties.

Well, sir, with the captain's permission,

I think I'd better pass it up.

You see, uh, I've been with this bunch
since boot camp,

and, well,
it's not that they're not a good outfit,

it's just that,
well, they still got a ways to go

and somebody has to stay on 'em
every minute.

I understand.

But if there's any change
in the situation,

- let me know.
- Yes, sir.

Sounded like a pretty good deal, Sarge.

Yeah.

Sure, it was a good deal!

A nice desk job at headquarters?
What could be better?

But could I take it? No!
You wanna know why?

Because this chowderhead platoon can't
blow its nose without me, that's why!

Somebody else gets all the nice jobs!

I'm stuck with the monkeys in the zoo!

Come on, monkeys, let's finish our work!

Ain't that a shame?

It's really too bad Sergeant Carter
can't take that there job.

- Why, he...
- [Carter] Pyle! Over here!

You know, Duke,
it would've been kinda sweet

having Big Daddy off our backs
for a couple of weeks.

Yeah.

If Corporal Boyle agreed to take over,
Carter might go for that other job.

Hey, that's worth a try.

Boy, I sure don't understand it, Corporal.

Huh?

Why Sergeant Carter didn't take that job.

- He's got you to take over for him.
- What are you talking about?

I'll bet it never even occurred to him
that the corporal could take over for him.

Yeah! Sergeant Carter
must have a lot of confidence in you.

Don't you think so?

Boy, if he doesn't have confidence in you
by now, well, I don't know!

Now, look, stay out of it, will ya?

Sure.
We just thought it was worth mentioning

because we sure think of you
as a second sergeant.

And we thought the sarge
thought of you as a second sergeant.

Well, we'll talk to you later, Sergeant.

Uh, Corporal!

Did you see these rifle score sheets?

Did ya?

Miss, miss, miss, miss, miss, miss, miss!

Those guys couldn't hit the floor
with their shoes!

Well, we got some more practice scheduled.

They're not just knuckleheads,
but near-sighted knuckleheads!

For this I give up a job at headquarters!

A chance to take advantage of a good job
for a man with my experience

and I can't take it!

And what do you suppose would happen
if you did take it?

Do you think it would be
the end of the platoon?

- Huh?
- What am I here for?

What am I supposed to be training for?

It means only one thing -
you got no confidence in me.

- Huh? Is that it?
- No, that's not it!

I've got confidence in you.

You're sharp, you're dependable,
you're a good worker.

But?

But I don't think
you can handle the platoon.

Hey, Sergeant,
where do you want me to put this wire?

- Why isn't that on a reel?
- You mean that little spool?

Well, I couldn't find it. I guess it's
out there in that tall grass somewheres.

Phones...

- Where are the phones?
- Well...

Ain't it at the end of this here wire?

I guess that's out there
in the tall grass, too.

If you'll help me out of this,
I'll go look for it.

- Is that beautiful?
- Well, I'm sorry, Sergeant,

but you said get this here equipment in
on the double.

And like I always say, haste makes waste!

Boyle, you really think
you can handle the platoon?

Huh?

Well, just a minute ago,
you said you could, didn't you?

All right, Corporal, they're all yours!

Pyle plus Knuckleheads Incorporated,

the whole mess,
they're all yours for two whole weeks.

And no welching,

because I want to enjoy
every minute of it.

Here's some more instruction sheets
on the new radio here, Sergeant.

Oh, yeah, so they are.

The captain would like to talk to you
about the training school curriculum.

Oh, sure, sure.

The curriculum, huh?

Yeah, a list of studies for each course.

Oh, sure, sure!

Well, you can't do a thing
without curriculums!

Boy, they sure use fine print
in this stuff, don't they?

If you don't mind the suggestion,
Sergeant,

you'll be doing a lot of close paperwork

and it might be worth your while
to get some reading glasses.

Glasses? Me?

Well, they can fix you up with a pair
at the dispensary.

They really help.

Yeah. Maybe I will.

- Hi, Vince.
- Oh, hi, Boyle!

Don't tell me you wanna back out
on the deal already. Too much for you?

- There you go! No confidence!
- No, no.

Just a couple of things came in
for you to sign.

Oh!

Hey, nice setup!

What do you mean, nice?

It's perfect!

You wanna know the best part?

Listen.

- You hear that?
- I don't hear anything.

Exactly! You don't hear anything!

No yelling, no goof-ups, no nothing.

Just beautiful silence, huh? [chuckles]

Something else...

What do you see out there?

The drill field, the barracks.

Now what do you see?

Nothing!

You don't see nothing. Ain't that great?

One pull on the string, presto!

I don't even have to watch
that bunch of knuckleheads!

It's like a dream come true.
Hear no monkeys, see no monkeys.

Yeah, I know what you mean.

Well, I better be going.

Look, Boyle, there's still one thing
that can kill this for me.

If that platoon starts lousing up and
they hear about it back here, that's it.

I don't mind telling you, for the
time being, I'm enjoying this new life.

Oh, I understand.

Now, I know it's not an easy job.

You got one guy back there
that can goof it up all by himself.

- Oh, you mean...
- Please!

Don't even mention that name.

For two weeks,
I don't even wanna know he exists.

- Okay, Sarge.
- Yeah.

Uh, Boyle? Remember, I'm counting on you.

You said you could do it.

And I'm doing it! I'm doing it!

All right.

Sergeant? I mean Corporal! Could you
raise liberty for us this weekend?

Later! Later! I got a few other things
to take care of.

What a time to take over.

Just when I got the color guard,
the bivouac, the camouflage drill.

- [phone rings]
- Duty hut, First Platoon.

Yes, sir. Parade formation,
Class A uniforms. Yes, sir.

The Muster List...!

Hard to believe, isn't it? Five whole days

and not once have we heard,
"Move it! Move it!"

I sure miss ol' what's-his-name!

Hey, fellas! Is Corporal Boyle here?

Pyle, I'm putting you in the color guard
for parade formation on Saturday.

- Golly!
- And don't blow it.

If you foul it up in front of the whole
brigade, it'll be bad for the sergeant.

- It will?
- Why, sure.

They're liable to just take him
off his new job and shove him back here.

They're liable to think
we can't do a thing without him.

We sure wouldn't want 'em to think that.

I'll see to it that everything's as slick
as can be so he'll be proud of us.

Good.

Oh! Sergeant Persky
wanted the bivouac gear returned,

and the Corpsman said that you forgot
to send the men for their booster shots,

and the Lieutenant wants you to pick up
some new radio handbooks.

Well, I'll pick up the handbooks for you,
if it's all right?

Give me a chance to say hey
to Sergeant Carter.

- Anything you want me to tell him?
- Yeah.

You can tell him for me I'm sorry he...
Oh, never mind.

- Uh, Corporal?
- Hm?

If you don't mind my saying,
I think you're doing a wonderful job

- while the Sarge is away, isn't he?
- Oh, oh, real swell!

I mean, considering all the extra details
you got. Right?

Yeah, yeah, real swell!

So we sure hope you're not thinking
about calling the sarge back.

Where did you get that idea?

I just thought maybe you were gonna
tell Pyle to tell Sergeant Carter maybe...

- What are you, some kinda mind-reader?
- No, no, I just thought that...

Now listen, I was left in charge,
so I'm in charge.

Right, and doing a swell job, too,
right, Frankie?

- Yeah, yeah, real swell.
- Well, keep up the good work.

We'll be talking to you, Sergeant.
Uh, Corporal!

- [shouting in background]
- [officer] Move! Right flank!

Move!

[overlapping cadence calls]

Hey, Sergeant!

Oh, Pyle, it's you!

I was, uh,
just getting a breath of fresh air.

But with all that racket out there...

- How's the job going?
- Oh, fine, fine! Couldn't be better.

My own little office, nice and private,

just put my feet up and light a cigar.
This is the life.

Well, I sure am glad you like it,
Sergeant.

You deserve something restful and relaxing
like this.

Yeah, yeah, it's a nice job,

helping to prepare them training books,
no knuckleheads to bother me.

Uh, nothing personal, Pyle!

I understand.

And, of course, I spend a lot of time
putting together curriculums.

Putting together what?

Curriculums.

You can't do a thing without curriculums.

My, my! Ain't those becoming of you!

You look just like Marvin Dorsey.

He works for the civil service back home.

How are things back home? In the platoon?

- What's doing?
- We just got back from an overnight march.

Yeah?

- Where'd you go?
- Out through Stone Canyon.

You know that real rocky place

where you used to like to holler out
and hear your echo come back?

- How did it go?
- Well...

I suppose Lombardi
forgot his camouflage gear, as usual.

And Souchek never was any good
at making up a pack.

I guess a lot of guys fell out this time,
huh?

Oh, no. Everything was fine. Just fine.

Oh. Well, that's good.

Well, I can't take up the time
of a busy executive.

I sure wish you was gonna be with us
tomorrow on the rifle range.

- Tomorrow?
- Uh-huh.

Are you shooting for scores tomorrow?

Look, you tell Boyle to make sure Saunders
gets his windage correction right.

And Slater has to be reminded
to squeeze off his rounds,

- not to snap the trigger.
- I understand.

But don't you worry none
about Corporal Boyle.

He's doing a real fine job.

You just forget all about us and
enjoy this nice job that you like so much.

Well, I'll see you, Sergeant!

[man calls cadence in distance]

[indistinct shouting]

[sergeant] Move!

[platoon] One! Two! Three! Four!

[Carter sighs]

- Good morning, sir.
- Good morning, Sergeant.

Well, that's fine, Haynes.

I was just telling Haynes how well
the work seems to be going here.

Oh, uh, thank you, sir.

In fact, I'm sure if you requested a
permanent transfer, it could be arranged.

There'll be another project
after this one, and then more after that.

Here? Permanent?

It would mean giving up platoon work.
You couldn't possibly do both.

Well, sir,
I really wouldn't like to do that.

I mean, not yet.

Not that I don't like this job,
it's just that...

Well, like I said, I've been with
the same platoon since boot camp and,

well, if I was to leave them now,
I'm sure they'd do okay...

- Well, you think it over.
- Yes, sir.

I will hate to leave, though. [sighs]

I've kind of enjoyed this for a while,
anyway.

Yeah, but I know how you feel.

After being with a bunch of guys
that long, you get to miss them.

No, it's not that!

It's not that I miss them.
It's that they need me.

Mm!

Uh, get me the duty hut, Company B.

I'd better check on 'em,
make sure they're all still there!

Uh, Boyle?

Carter.

I'm gonna be down in your area
in a couple of hours.

What do you say we have chow together?

Right. I'll meet you at the barracks.

You come along, too.
I'll show you what I mean.

Let's see,
I haven't been there for a week, huh?

Well, just get a load of this bunch
when I haven't been around for a week.

You know, fellas,
we oughta keep this place looking better.

And out front's looking real messy, too.

It ain't at all the way Sergeant Carter
taught us.

Oh, listen to this - Corporal Pyle!

And to think, next week is gonna be
just as peaceful as this week was!

Hey, Boyle says to remind you guys we're
due at the rifle range in 20 minutes.

- How's he doing?
- Okay.

He was on the phone to Carter.
Sergeant's coming over at noon.

He can't! He's still got another week!

Nah, just for chow or something.

Oh, boy, for a minute, I thought...

Wait a minute. Just for chow?

It's a spy mission. A trap!

And if he sees what's been going on,
he'll be back like a shot.

Fellas, I'm ashamed of you.
Gomer's absolutely right.

We oughta keep this place looking better.
For Sergeant Carter.

Well, I sure am glad to hear.

When we get back from the range,
we gotta all pitch in

and really shine this place up good.

In fact, we oughta start
policing up the place now.

Good, good, good!

- All right, Duke, what's the angle?
- Don't you see?

If we want another week off, we've got to
prove to Carter we're doing great.

So if we make everything pretty,

it'll give us seven more days
of peace and quiet. Right?

[lively music]

In just a minute, you'll see what
I was trying to tell the captain, Haynes.

You know what they say -
when the cat's away, the mice will play.

Well, just keep your eyes open.

And then I'm gonna come down on them,
but hard!

[chuckles]

Oh, Sergeant Carter!
Hey, that's a nice surprise!

Hey, Sergeant!
We didn't know you was coming by.

Come on, Gomer, we gotta finish up.

Hey! Hi, Vince!

Oh, hiya, Boyle. This is Corporal Haynes.

- Hi.
- How are ya?

Hey, the place looks pretty good! [laughs]

[clears throat] Okay, men! Secure the work.

- Chow time!
- OK, you guys, let's hustle up. Chow time!

Double time.
Hup-hup, hup-hup, hup-hup, ho!

Hup, hup, hup, hup, hup, hup, hup!

Hup, hup, hup, hup, hup, hup, hup!

The rifle scores just came in
from this morning.

Oh, yeah? How'd they make out?

Oh, not too bad. Fact is, they did
just about as good as they ever did.

It's still not perfect,
but it's encouraging.

Yeah. They seem to be holding their own,
all right.

Say, Vince,
how's the job at headquarters?

Are you still enjoying it?

Oh, fine, fine!

It's great, huh?

- Glad to hear it.
- [Duke] Hip, hup, hup, hup, hip,

hup, forward... march!

Hup, ho, hup, ho, hup, hup, hup, hup,
hup...

Well, how about it, Vince?
Shall we join 'em?

Uh, no, I...

No, I just came down here to tell you
I won't be able to make it after all.

I got some extra work that came in.

Oh.

Well, I'll, uh, I'll see you later.

Sure you wouldn't like to have some chow?

No, no.

- You go ahead. I gotta get back.
- Okay.

[knocking]

[typewriter clangs]

Oh, hi, Haynes. Have a good lunch?

Yeah, fine.

I, uh,

- guess I was wrong about my outfit, huh?
- Huh?

I mean,
they were doing pretty good without me.

Well, that's kind of a tribute to you,
Sergeant.

- You're the one that taught them.
- Yeah.

[sighs] But now it's time I shoved off, I guess.

I-I think that's what the captain
was trying to tell me.

- Ya think?
- Well, I don't know about that.

Sure. That's why they got me over here
in the first place.

The whole thing's
beginning to make sense now.

- Ain't that so?
- Well...

So I'll take him up on his offer.

I'll make this a permanent deal.

I'm putting in for a transfer.

- Is Sergeant Carter here?
- Right inside.

Hey, Sergeant!

Corporal Boyle just sent me over

to ask if you'd do a big favor for him and
do the barracks inspection this afternoon.

Pyle, what are you talking about?

Well, they sent him way out
to the boondocks on a special detail,

and he said he certainly would be obliged,
but you've just got time to make it.

[Carter sighs] All right. All right, I'll do it.

Here, put this on the captain's desk.

- You coming?
- I can't. I got messenger duty.

I'll take the Jeep.

There goes a fine man!
Just about the best there is going.

I sure have missed him.
He's been gone so long.

Looks like he's gonna be gone
for even longer.

He's requesting transfer here.

Huh?

Well, why would he wanna
do a thing like that?

Oh, I don't think he wants to, but I guess
he doesn't feel needed back there.

- Things were running so smoothly.
- But they wasn't really!

[Haynes] What?

Things weren't near as nice
as when Sergeant Carter was there.

We barely did have time to straighten up
the place like he likes to see it,

on account of he was coming by and
we wanted him to be proud of the platoon.

- Are you kidding?
- I was the one responsible.

- Oh, my gosh!
- [Haynes] What?

Well, the barracks he's going to inspect
now, they ain't never been purdier.

Now we'll lose him for sure
and it'll all be my fault!

- [drumroll]
- Ten!

Ten-hut!

[playful music]

At ease.

Well, uh,
that was a pretty good inspection.

In fact, not bad at all.

If your barracks are that good,

well, I guess you guys are coming along
all right.

Ten!

[drumroll]

Ten-hut!

Dismissed.

Hey, Sergeant!

I know I'm supposed to be
on messenger duty,

but I just didn't wanna miss being here
when you inspected the barracks.

Barracks?

This ain't a barracks, it's a pigsty!

And look at them bunks!
Look at them blankets!

Look at that loose gear!

Well, let's get crackin'!

Come on!
Move, move, move, move, move, move!

Move!

Well, you clean up the outside and
you think you're putting one over, huh?

Huh? One lucky day on the rifle range
and you think you're Marines, huh?

I can't turn my back on you guys
for ten minutes!

Well, the honeymoon is over!

I'm gonna run you guys ragged!

Now I gotta give up

the sweetest deal a guy ever had

just to come back here
and wet-nurse you knuckleheads!

You heard me! Knuckleheads,
that's what you are, ain't that right?

I turn my back on you guys
for a few minutes

and ya fall to pieces!

I can't believe it.

You mean it? The sarge was really gonna
transfer out permanent?

Uh-huh, I seen the letter.

And he truly didn't like that job
at headquarters one tiny little bit.

Now tell the truth -

we really wouldn't wanna lose
Sergeant Carter, would we?

- Well, one more week would've been nice.
- Yeah.

Okay, tell me one thing, Gome, how were
you able to wreck the joint so quick?

Well, let me tell you, it wasn't easy.
I really had to work at it.

First, I grabbed these blankets ends
like this,

ripped these out like this.

And then I messed up the lockers
real fierce, like this.

You sure picked a murderous week
to take off!

Otherwise you could've done great.

Listen, I gave 'em a real chewing out.

By now, they oughta have that barracks
shined up to beat the band!

Come on, take a look.
See how they hop to when I snap the whip!

What is this, a barracks or a pigsty?

I told you knuckleheads
to get this place squared away!

Look at them bunks! Look at them blankets!

Get them lockers closed!
I want them books on the desk!

Move, move, move, move!