All language subtitles for Gomer Pyle U S M C S01E19 Love Letters to the Sarge 1080p BluRay FLAC2 0 H 264-BTN_track5_[eng]

[marching band playing]

[male announcer] Gomer Pyle - USMC.

Starring Jim Nabors
as Gomer Pyle.

Also starring Frank Sutton
as Sergeant Carter.

[bugle playing]

- Slater!
- Yeah, man!

- Fitzgerald!
- Here!

Golly, Duke, you must have them girls
wrapped around your finger.

That makes seven for the day.

No, I gotta be honest with you,
Gome, only six count. One's from a guy.

How do you like that,
none from Cindy today.

- Slater!
- Uh! There it is.

- Gottschalk!
- Yeah, yeah.

- Pyle!
- Yo!

Good ol' Suzy, she hasn't
missed a day yet.

Hey, you did pretty good, too, Gome.
Who are they from?

Well, this one's from Ida Carrington,

- and this one's from Lila Mae Pruitt...
- Will you look at that?

You know, in your own quiet way,
I think you do all right for yourself.

Well...

I bet you left a string of broken hearts
back home, you sly dog, you.

Oh, come on, Duke.

- Sergeant Carter!
- Here, here! Right here!

Here you are.

Ain't that nice? Sergeant Carter
got a letter from a girl, too.

- Gottschalk.
- Yeah.

- Dupar.
- Here.

- Oppenheim.
- Yeah.

- Mitchell.
- Here.

- McIntyre.
- Here.

- Davenport.
- Here.

- Coogan.
- Here.

- Moskowitz.
- Here.

- Spencer!
- Yo.

Here's the letter
from the girl, Gomer.

"Tire sale. Buy one tire
at the regular price

and get a second tire
at half price."

Man, that sure is sexy.

That's a shame.

I just can't figure out why

Sergeant Carter
don't never get no mail.

Wake up, Gomer. If you were a girl,
would you write to him?

- I don't know. I think so.
- Why?

Well, 'cause when it comes
to gettin' letters,

he's just like any of the rest of us,

he's got feelings
just like we got.

Just because he's a sergeant
don't mean he's made out of stone.

I think it'd mean a whole lot
to him to get a letter from a girl.

Well, why don't you get
one of your girlfriends back home

to write to him?

"Dear Sergeant Carter,

Gomer Pyle has written
and described you to me.

All I can say is, 'Yuck'!"

Do you know what you ain't got,
Duke? Feelings for others.

For others, I do. Not for sergeants.
See you, boy. Come on.

- Yes, may I help you?
- Hey, ma'am.

You see, I want to write a love letter,

and I was sorta hopin'
that you might know some books

of some famous love letters
that you could lend me,

just to get an idea
of somethin' to write.

Or maybe some love poems.
Just somethin' with love.

Of course. I think,
more has been written on love

than any other subject.

In fact, I think we have
a book called Famous Love Letters.

Let's see if it's out.

No. It's here. It's in section 342.
It's number 217.

That's wonderful.
Thank you, ma'am.

And when it comes to
poems of love,

you can always rely on
Elizabeth Barrett Browning.

Golly, I don't know how
to thank you, Miss Browning.

"And I... will never...
be happy...

till... your heart... is mine.

Oh, to be... in one another's arms."

Love letters.

- Uh-huh.
- I hope it does the trick.

Hey, can I read it to you and see
if it sounds all right?

All right.

"My dearest,
most beloved darling."

That's good,
that's good.

"How I have worshiped you
from afar,

but now I can
no longer contain myself.

No longer can I silence
this burning love

that is bursting within me."

I think you got
a real winner there, boy.

Wait, I got three more pages.
Listen to this part.

"The violet loves
a sunny bank,

The cowslip loves the lea

The scarlet creeper loves the elm

But I love thee"

How do you like that one?

Wonderful, wonderful. Your girlfriend
is going to really love that letter.

Oh, this ain't to my girlfriend.
It's to my sergeant.

Well, can I help you
with something?

Thank you. Uh...

I was kinda lookin'
to buy some perfume.

Something fancy and something
that smells real nice.

Ah, well, this is a lovely fragrance.
It's called Sublime.

Well, smell it.

[inhales]

Mmm. That smells
mighty nice.

And this one is very light
and reeks of femininity.

It's called
Anything Goes.

Well, that sounds
sort of advanced.

Golly, that smells
real nice, too.

And this one is just delightful.
It has a kind of a wispy aroma.

- It's called Merveilleux.
- It's called what?

Merveilleux... That means
"marvelous" in French.

Oh.

Mmm. That smells real good, too.

Well, you couldn't go wrong
with any one of these, you know.

Well, it's just
so hard to decide,

and this is real special,
so it's got to be just right.

Do you think it'd be all right
if I took just one more sniff?

Oh, of course.
No, go right ahead.

I'll take that one.

That's Merveilleux.

That's the one
I would've picked.

Well, now,
shall I wrap it as a gift?

Oh, no, thank you.
I ain't givin' it to nobody.

I just wanted it
for a love letter.

- Sergeant Carter!
- Here, here! Back here! Here!

Come on, come on!

[all groaning appreciatively]

What's the matter? Didn't you guys
ever smell a perfumed letter before?

Not like that. The wind's blowin'
the other way and I can still smell it.

Well, read your own!

"The mysterious Miss X."

[whispering] "My dearest,
most beloved darling..."

What's the matter? Would you guys
like me to read it to you?

Well?

I don't mind.

"My dearest,
most beloved darling."

Huh?

"No longer can my heart
endure this aching pain

because I am not by your side
every moment of every day."

That's it.

Eat your hearts out.

Wow, what a letter!

You know, I'm surprised
it didn't burn a hole in the envelope.

You know what? I still think
it's a letter for another tire sale.

He didn't read us the end.

But who would write him
a letter like that? Who?

Maybe the Sergeant's
like you said I was, Duke, a sly dog.

Well, whoever wrote that to him
sure made his day.

- You think so? You really think so?
- Yeah. Look at him.

[reading silently]

"The mysterious Miss X."

"The mysterious Miss X."

Would you like
to hear this one?

All right.

"My dearest darling,
conqueror of my heart."

Good?

Is this letter going to
the same party as the other day?

Uh-huh.

Your sergeant?

Right.

That's a new one, isn't it?
Women sergeants in the Marines?

No. They got 'em.

Oh.

Your sergeant...
What's her name?

It's not her, it's him. Vincent.

Listen to this.
This is my favorite part comin' up.

"How do I love thee?"

"Let me count the ways

I love thee to the depth and breadth
and height my soul can...

...reach"

"Oh, my darling, every moment
I am awake is spent thinking of you,

and at night,
I count myself to sleep

trying to remember every
little freckle on your nose."

Who is she?

Who is she?

[shouting] Who, who, who is she?

Miss X.

Miss X.

[groans]

[mumbles]

What do you want, Pyle?

I just came
for my pass, Sergeant.

There's a real good movie on
in town,

Godzilla Goes
To A Beach Party.

I don't suppose you'd like
to go with me, would you, Sergeant?

You don't suppose right,
Pyle.

Letter from a girl?

- That's right, Pyle.
- Makes you feel good, don't it?

Well, it sure don't make me sad.

Any letter that begins,

"My dearest darling,
conqueror of my heart..."

Golly.
That sure is pretty talk.

I'll bet you wish you knew
who it was from.

Oh, I can sure guess
who it's from.

You can?

Oh...
W-Well, sure.

There must be
a half-dozen girls around here

who'd write you
a letter like that.

There are?

Uh, of course there are.

Who do you think
it might be, Pyle?

Uh, see how good you are
at guessing.

Well...

It could be that girl
at the lunch counter at the PX, Shirley.

I've seen her look at you
real warm and friendly like.

Yeah. Shirley.

Yeah.

Or, it could be that hatcheck
girl at the Club Ha Ha.

Adelaide?

I've seen you two grinnin'
and talkin' to each other.

Yeah, Adelaide.

- Or that girl at the USO.
- Marilyn.

I seen the look in her eyes once

when she handed you
a ping-pong paddle.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Could be any one of 'em,
Sergeant, or more.

Yeah, it could be.

Yeah, it could be, but...

Well, I don't think
it'd be very gentlemanly

of me to tell you who it is.

- You understand?
- Oh, I sure do.

It's like you say, it wouldn't be
very gentlemanly. [chuckles]

- You don't have to tell me.
- I won't.

Well, uh, look, why don't you
go to your movie

and let me get
some work done, huh?

- Sure, Sarge. I'll see you later.
- Yeah.

Yeah! Yeah, yeah!

[rock 'n' roll music playing]

- Allow me, Shirley.
- Why not, I'm here to please.

Hands like these,
Shirley,

were never meant
for this kind of work.

I know, I was gonna be a brain surgeon,
only this job came along first.

Ah, you can't fool me.

There's something about you
that's different...

Poetic...
if you know what I mean.

Me, poetic?

"How do I love thee?
Let me count the ways

I love thee to the depth
and breadth and...

...height my soul can reach"

Well?

Well, what?

What's the sense kidding anymore...

Miss X?

Huh?
Uh, what'd you call me?

Didn't that poem
mean anything to you?

Oh, I didn't say that.
It's a nice poem.

Well, isn't there anything
you wanna tell me?

Something I should know?

I don't know
what you mean.

Come on. Out with it.

Well, uh...

Tell me, Shirley. Tell me.

All right.

Don't order the liver and onions.
They're from yesterday.

I always said there was something
different about you, something poetic.

So, how come you never
mentioned it to me before?

Well,
you know how it is.

Come on, recite
your favorite poem for me.

Oh, I...

Please!

- Well...
- Come on, come on!

Okay.

"There was a young man
from Pomona whose girlfriend..."

[shouting] Is that
the only poem you know?

So, what's the matter?
You heard it before?

Yeah, I heard it, I heard it.
I'll see you around, Adelaide.

Okay. Hey, if I hear
any new ones, I'll let you know!

Did you ever lie awake nights

tryin' to count the freckles
on my nose?

[sighs]

You like my perfume,
Vince?

Yeah!

Yeah!
It's real nice.

I use it all the time.
It's called Merveilleux.

"How do I love thee?"

"Let me count the ways

I love thee to the depth and breadth
and height my soul can reach"

Yeah! That's it! That's it!
Now, just one more thing.

Would you do a favor
for me, Marilyn?

Sure.

Well, that's always been
one of my favorite poems,

but I keep
forgettin' the words.

W-Would you please
write it down for me?

I'll do even better.
I'll type it.

No, no, it has to be
in your handwriting.

I mean, what's the sense
of all that typing?

I can't write.
I broke my finger four weeks ago.

It's been in a splint
ever since.

Type it, type it.

"When we're apart, it's as if
my heart stops beating,

and my only happiness comes
in the thought that love conquers all.

I would follow you
to the ends of the earth."

How about them apples?

You know, I bet she writes
with a crayon.

They wouldn't let a dame like that
use sharp instruments.

Go ahead and laugh.
You guys never got a letter like this.

She writes like a poet.

Yeah, I bet she looks like a poet,
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.

You're just jealous,
that's all, you're just jealous.

What do we got
to be jealous about?

We don't even know
what she looks like.

Yeah, what does she look like?

- Well, she's...
- Yeah?

- She's...
- Well?

S-S-She's beautiful!

Yeah, yeah, that's
what she looks like, she's beautiful!

Anybody who can write
poems like this.

If you wasn't so
ashamed of her, Vince,

you'd take her downtown,
to one of the nightclubs.

We could see for ourselves.

Yeah, yeah, seein' is believin'.

Well, look, I can't help it if she
don't wanna go to them

smoky, noisy clip joints.

Boy, you got an excuse
for everything.

Hey, I'll tell you what. There's
a USO dance here this Saturday night.

Now, she can't have anything
against goin' to that.

Well, uh, I'll ask her.

But I can't guarantee
she'll come.

Of course she'll come.

What's a 15-minute bus ride

to a girl who is willing to follow
you to the ends of the earth?

That's this Saturday night, Vince.
We'll be waiting.

Breathless.

[laughing]

What are you
lookin' at, Pyle?

[groans]

"Oh, my loved one,

my most precious and beloved,

I beg thee to understand

the wretched thing I must now do.

But we are left no choice.

The brutally unhappy fact is this,

I must leave thee,

and you shall never see
or hear from me again.

Just remember this,

I'll cherish your love
throughout eternity.

Farewell."

Well?

You going over the hill?

Going over the hill?

Why would I do
a thing like that?

I don't know.
Where are you going?

To mail this letter.

To your sergeant, uh,
Vincent.

Right. You remembered.

Tell me something,
what does your Sergeant say

when he gets those letters
from you?

Oh, he don't know
that they're from me.

Why, if he thought
they was from me, he'd die,

he'd just die.

Then why do you write them?

Well, the Sergeant never did
get any letters from any girls,

like all the other fellers,

and that made him
feel just awful.

So, I started writin' him
these love letters.

Oh!

And that made him
feel good?

It sure did.

Then why are you stopping?

Well, a few of his friends
wanted to see this here girl.

So I decided I'd write him
a farewell letter,

and that'd get him
out of his predicament.

Oh. Oh, that's a mighty fine thing
you're doing there, son.

Well...

Not many fellas would
go to that trouble.

Aw, heck.

He's sure gonna miss
those letters, isn't he?

I guess.

How does that go again,
that, uh, that last part?

"Just remember this,

I'll cherish your love
throughout eternity."

That's sad.

That's real sad.

Well, it's for the best
we end it this way.

Cole!

- Mahoney!
- Yo!

What's the matter, Vince,
no letter today?

Don't worry,
it'll come, it'll come.

Well, I sure hope
nothing's happened to her.

I'm counting on
meetin' her tomorrow night.

Ain't that right, Vince?

Huh?

Oh, yeah.
Tomorrow night, tomorrow night.

Could be her letter
got lost in the mail.

Or maybe she put it in her pocket
and forgot to mail it.

Sure didn't sound like
the fickle type in her letters.

[mailman] Sergeant Carter!

Here! Right over here,
right over here!

- Moskowitz!
- Here!

- Spencer!
- Yo!

- Balkawitz!
- Yeah.

- Somerville!
- Here.

"But I must leave thee,

and you shall never see
or hear from me again."

- Watson.
- Here.

Never see or hear
from her again?

- Gottschalk!
- Yeah.

- Dupar!
- Here!

- Oppenheim!
- Yeah.

- Mitchell!
- Here.

- McIntyre!
- Here!

Sergeant Carter!

Here.

- Ross!
- Here.

- Mavrich!
- Right here.

- Kazinsky!
- Here.

[Shirley] Dear Vince,

I must have seemed
awfully silly to you the other day,

but I never realized

that tough Sergeant Carter
also has a warm and artistic soul.

It's from Shirley.

Sergeant Carter!

Here, here!

- Brooks!
- Yo!

[Adelaide] Dear Vince,
you sure surprised me the other night.

Who knows? Maybe we were
made for each other.

- From Adelaide.
- Sergeant Carter!

Hey, keep 'em coming!
Keep 'em coming!

[Marilyn] The doctor says
the cast will be off by Wednesday.

So, how's about
a quiet dinner at my place?

It's from Marilyn
at the USO.

I'm sorry, Whip. [sighs]

I won't be able to make it
to the dance tomorrow.

It just wouldn't look right for me
to show up with three girls.

You will excuse me.

You know, for a guy
who never used to get any mail,

he's sure doin' all right
all of a sudden.

How do you figure?

Well, whatever it is,
it don't make no difference,

as long as he's happy.

So the drunk says,

"Well, if you have to
go downstairs for it, forget it."

All right, all you guys
going on liberty,

I want everything cleared away
before you take off.

Hey, Sergeant.

Hey, Pyle,
don't you have a date?

No. I was just writing
Ida Carrington back home.

Your girlfriend?

Well, kind of.

"Dear Ida, I'm fine.

How are you?
Fine, I hope.

The weather here is fine.

How's the weather there?
Fine, I hope."

- That's the letter?
- Uh-huh.

Well, Pyle, no wonder
you don't have a date.

Somebody ought to teach you
how to write a letter,

a love-type letter.