Original subtitles

We're all just floating.

- You couldn't possibly... - No, I wish I was lying.

I just, you know, we'd all just made surgeon.

That was it. We were the elite. The world was ours, you know.

So you had to be naked?

Naked, yes. And on top of the statue of Hippocrates.

- Can you just picture me? - What, naked?

Oh, well, let's see, I'm gonna have to conjure up...

Yeah, that's gonna be difficult.

- So did the Feds come? - There were no Feds.

- Until I started singing. - Oh, no...

- No, this is not... - What did you sing?

This is not funny. This is a morality tale about the evils of sake.

I would be there right now.

I mean, it was... It was either...

It was either that or the national anthem.

- Reports vary. - You don't remember any of this?

I remember talking the Feds out of telling my father.

Or paying the Feds out of telling my father.

I get fuzzy on aspects.

So, like, never?

Well...

no.

Not ever never?

Some orders allow shepherds to marry, but I follow a narrower path.

But, I mean, you still got the urge? They don't cut it off or nothing?

No. I'm more or less intact.

I just direct my energy elsewhere.

You mean, like masturbating?

I hope you're not thinking of taking orders yourself.

Yeah, that'll be the day.

I got stupid. The money was too good.

I don't give half a hump if you're innocent or not.

So where does that put you?

It ain't impossible. Saint Jayne. It's got a ring to it.

I'm just trying to remember how many miracles you've performed.

I once hit a guy from 500 yards with a bent scope.

- Don't that count upstairs? - Oh, it'll be taken into consideration.

You made that sound kind of ominous.

I put out waves to some old acquaintances.

I may even find something in New Melbourne if you need the shuttle.

I'll only be there to pick up cargo.

The only thing you're gonna find there is fish and fish-related activities.

So unless you got the overwhelming urge to gut sturgeon, and who hasn't?

But it's a layover point for almost every planet.

I could... I just don't want to draw this out.

Have you decided when you'll tell the others?

I... No.

- I appreciate your not saying anything. - Well, I don't, so make up your mind.

I'm a big girl. Just tell me.

None of it means a damn thing.

It's just an object. It doesn't mean what you think.

- Stay calm! - You know that's...

Stop yelling. That's gonna make it worse.

River. Sweetheart. Put it down.

- Where did you get that? - Don't yell.

It was in my hand.

I'm not mad, just let me... Thank you.

Fully loaded, safety off. This here is a recipe for unpleasantness.

- Does she understand that? - She understands.

She doesn't comprehend.

I'm glad we've made that distinction. No touching guns, okay?

No touching.

- River... - It's getting very, very crowded!

Thought she was on the mend.

Her medications are erratic.

There's not one that her system can't eventually break down and...

If I want a lot of medical jargon, I'll talk to a doctor.

- You are talking to a doctor. - Yeah. Okay.

My point is, it could have been you she might have shot.

The doctor, as you just made note of. And who exactly could fix you?

Not nobody.

We're deep in space, corner of No and Where.

You take extra care with her...

because we're very much alone out here.

Little River gets more colorful by the moment. What'll she do next?

Either blow us all up or rub soup in our hair. It's a tossup.

I hope she does the soup thing.

It's always a hoot, and we don't all die from it.

- That poor kid. - Yeah.

She's definitely got...

- Funny. - Something wrong?

I'm getting a weird heat bounce off our wake.

- Engine flux? - Sensors probably got turned around...

She can only get in there if she knows the combination.

I don't leave loaded guns around.

She got her hands on your hardware.

Suppose she took up something with hull-piercing bullets.

Bullets are soft lead. Even Vera could barely breach the hull...

and she's the best I got. Now...

let's move the conversation in "not Jayne's fault" direction.

I didn't make her crazy. Hell, I didn't even want her on the ship.

Is that the direction you want this conversation to go in?

Just don't want to take a lashing for something I ain't the cause of.

- Where is River now? - Her room.

Which I'm thinking of bolting from the outside.

That's a little extreme.

Remember her coming at me with a butcher's knife?

- Wacky fun. - You wanna go, little man?

Only if it's someplace with candlelight.

I don't think she'd harm anyone.

- Butcher's knife! - Anyone we can't spare.

As far as we know, she's never even picked up a gun before.

That ain't so.

Kaylee, you got something to say?

Okay, Kaylee, why don't you speak your piece?

It was when the captain and Wash got took by Niska.

I ain't like to forget that anytime soon.

Well, we all went in. Me too.

Didn't make much account of myself, I'm afraid.

I got no problem with you not killing nobody.

What's it to do with River? She wasn't in the fight.

Well, no, she was.

I got pinned down, and there were three guys, and I couldn't...

And then River comes up.

She looks out, sees them all.

And they was spread out, you know, had some cover.

She only looked for a second, and...

took my gun, closed her eyes...

killed them.

She shot them?

All three. Dead in an instant. Had her eyes still closed.

Well, that's [baboon's ass-crack]! You saw it wrong.

Not a jot. And it weren't auto-fire, or luck.

She just... She just did the math.

You understand how that sounds?

She killed them with math. What else could it have been?

You couldn't have done it, Jayne. Nor you, captain.

Nobody can shoot like that that's a person.

So River's not a person?

Oh, please, don't be mad.

I just want to understand what you're saying here.

I thought River was your friend.

She is! But, Simon, the way she...

Right after, she looked at me...

and she smiled, like nothing was wrong.

Like we were playing.

Scared me.

Could be she saved your life, Kaylee.

I'm aware of that, and I'm not...

She probably didn't even know what was going on.

Thought it was a game.

Later on, explain to me how that's a comfort.

Might have to use some of that math.

What we've got here to deal with is the larger issue.

And that larger issue is, we've got someone onboard this ship...

might be a danger to us.

Ain't a question of whether we like her.

Some of us have grown attached to River.

Kaylee, you have, or you would have spoken sooner.

Which, by the by, you should have.

I find River pleasant enough myself...

but she does have an oddness to her.

And I ain't just talking about her proficiency with firearms.

The girl knows things.

Things she shouldn't. Things she couldn't.

What, are you saying she's a witch?

Yes, Jayne. She's a witch. She has had congress with the Beast.

She's in Congress?

How did your brain even learn human speech?

I'm just so curious.

[Shut up, you inconsiderate schoolboys]!

This isn't a joking matter. This is about our lives and River's.

Thank you.

She's deeply intuitive. It's true that sometimes...

I don't think she's intuitive, doctor. I think she's a reader.

- Psychic? - Is that even remotely possible?

You tell me.

You've been studying what they've done to her.

Well, they've definitely altered the way she reacts to things.

Even the way she perceives. But I'm not...

Psychic, though? That sounds like something out of science fiction.

- You live in a spaceship, dear. - So?

Back up a second. Are you saying she really reads minds?

Or near enough. Am I alone thinking along these lines?

No.

Well, I don't like the idea of someone hearing what I'm thinking.

No one likes the idea of hearing what you're thinking.

The Alliance could have any number of uses for a psychic.

A psychic. Or an assassin.

She's just a kid.

And she just wants to be a kid.

I wish it were that simple.

Yeah. If wishes were horses, we'd all be eating steak.

- What do we plan to do about this? - Well, that's the question.

I don't think she'd ever hurt any of us.

Maybe you're right.

I ain't gonna make a decision till I thought on it a while.

It's late.

Let's get some rest.

- Simon... - I gotta check on my assassin.

Oh, please don't be mad. I had to say something.

I'm not mad at you.

I just...

She loves this ship.

I think it's more home to her than any place she's been.

What about you?

I mean, I...

I thought the hospital was home.

I was really making a difference there...

and embarrassingly large stacks of money.

And I could've...

I would be there right now if she hadn't...

If they had just left her alone.

Is it so bad here?

I don't even know if the captain...

No, I mean...

Isn't there anything about this place you're glad of?

Good night, you two.

- I... - Don't. Yeah, I...

Good night.

Don't let the space bugs bite.

Space bugs?

River?

River?

I like this ship.

Serenity. She's good-looking.

How did you get on?

Strains the mind a bit, don't it? You think you're all alone.

Maybe I come down the chimney, Kaylee.

Bring presents to the good girls and boys.

Maybe not though. Maybe I've always been here.

What do you want?

That's a beating heart, isn't it?

Pull off any one of 1000 parts, she'll just die.

Such a slender thread.

You ever been raped?

The captain is right down that hallway. He can hear you.

The captain's locked in his quarters.

They all are.

There's nobody can help you.

Say it.

There's nobody can help me.

I'm gonna tie you up now.

And you know what I'm gonna do then?

I'm gonna give you a present. Get rid of a problem you've got.

And I won't touch you in any wrong fashion, nor hurt you at all.

Unless you make some kind of ruckus.

You throw a monkey wrench into my dealings in any way...

your body is forfeit.

It ain't nothing but a body to me...

and I can find all unseemly manner of use for it.

Do you understand?

Yes.

Turn around and put your hands behind your back.

Oh...

Now tell me, Kaylee, where does River sleep?

Hello?

River?

Dr. Tam, why don't you sit yourself down.

- I'd rather die standing. - Well, the intention is not for you to die.

The warrant doesn't specify a particular need for you to be alive, but...

Where's your sister?

Are you Alliance?

- Am I a lion? - What?

I don't think of myself as a lion.

You might as well, though. I have a mighty roar.

- I said "Alliance". - Oh. I thought...

- No, I was... - That's weird.

- Where's your sister? - I don't know.

Who do you work for?

- This is her room. - Yes.

- It's empty. - I know.

So is it still her room when it's empty?

Does the room, the thing, have purpose? Or do we?

- What's the word? - I really can't help you.

The plan is to take your sister.

Get the reward, which is substantial.

"Imbue", that's the word.

- So you're a bounty hunter? - No, that ain't it at all.

- Then what are you? - I'm a bounty hunter.

I'm named Early.

I'm known to some.

Been tracking you since the Feds were tipped off on Ariel.

- She sleep with anybody? - River?

Yeah. She grapple with any of the crew? May be in their quarters.

No.

Maybe she does and you don't know about it.

This is insane. I'm not gonna help you find her, in any case.

I think this is very pretty. I like the weight of it.

I thought the intention was not to kill me.

You're missing the point.

The design of the thing is functional.

The plan is not to shoot you. The plan is to get the girl.

If there's no girl, then the plan, well, is like the room.

You are gonna help me look for her.

I don't think my last act in this 'verse is gonna be betraying my sister.

You're gonna help me.

Because every second you're with me is a chance to turn the tables...

to get the better of me.

Maybe you'll find your moment. Maybe I'll slip.

Or you refuse to help me...

I shoot your brain out and I go upstairs and spend some time...

violating the little mechanic I got trussed up in the engine room.

I take no pleasure in the thought, but she will die weeping if you cross me.

You're out of your mind.

That's between me and my mind. Let's start with these rooms.

He's not killed. Be a while before he comes to, but he'll mend.

How much a part of your plan dictated the need of beating up a shepherd?

That ain't a shepherd.

She wouldn't come in here anyway. She hates this room.

You see, Early...

the people you're planning to sell her to cut up her brain in a lab like this.

Tortured her. A teenaged girl.

- Not some bandit, just an innocent... - Ever been shot?

- No. - You ought to be shot.

Or stabbed. Lose a leg.

To be a surgeon, you know.

Know what kind of pain you're dealing with.

They make psychiatrists get psychoanalyzed...

before they can get certified...

but they don't make a surgeon get cut on.

That seem right to you?

Come on out, River. The nice man wants to kidnap you.

Shh.

I like the way the walls go out.

Gives you an open feeling. Firefly's a good design.

People don't appreciate the substance of things.

Objects in space.

People miss out on what's solid.

It's not your moment, doctor.

Is that the companion shuttle?

Yes.

We'll try the empty first. Then we'll pay her a visit.

Her room's not saying a damn thing.

Hold it.

This is pointless, you know that?

Two hundred thousand seems fairly pointed to me.

Money like that, I could retire.

Not that I would.

- What's life without work? - Serenity is a smuggling ship.

I've been here a year. I couldn't name where she might hide.

I don't have a year.

Your sister's becoming a real annoyance.

I feel for you.

I'm not gonna waste my time threatening you...

because I think you believe I will kill people if someone upsets my plan.

I'm gonna seal you in, though. You just sit.

You can still walk away from this. I know you're tired.

Don't go visiting my intentions.

Don't ever.

Man is stronger by far than woman...

yet only woman can create a child.

Does that seem right to you?

All right. That's all the hide-and-seek I got time for.

I know you're on this ship, little girl.

So here's how this goes.

Show yourself and finish this exchange, or your brother's brains'll be flying.

You understand. I'm sort of on the clock here. It's frustrating.

You're wrong, Early.

No, dumpling. I will shoot your brother if you...

Wrong about River. River's not on the ship.

They didn't want her here, but she couldn't make herself leave...

so she melted. Melted away.

They didn't know she could do that, but she did.

I'm not sure I take your meaning there.

I'm not on the ship. I'm in the ship.

I am the ship.

- River... - River's gone.

Then who exactly are we talking to?

You're talking to Serenity.

And Early...

Serenity is very unhappy.

Kaylee.

River!

You're afraid.

He tied me up.

- I don't know where he came from. - It's okay.

You're gonna be okay.

I told him where you were.

I'm sorry. I didn't know what else to do. I...

I'm fine. I need you to do something for me.

Gotta be brave.

- I'm tied up. I can't. - Got tools. Something sharp.

Don't be scared.

I'm right here.

Where'd she go?

I can't keep track of her when she's not incorporeally possessing a spaceship.

That's nonsensical crap. Ain't nobody can do that.

You somewhere on this boat. Somewhere with a 'com, playing games.

That's somewhat unsettling.

Early.

Mr. Jubal Early, bounty hunter.

May I call you Jubal?

Ain't nobody calls me that.

Your mother does.

Oh, sorry. Did. She's gone now.

Is that supposed to scare me, bringing up my mother?

You're a liar. I don't think your intentions are honorable.

Well, no. I'm a bounty hunter.

It's not generally considered honorable, so much as...

I live by a code, though, which I think is worth...

You hurt people.

Only when the job requires it.

Wrong. You're a bad liar. You crawl inside me uninvited...

and you hurt my crew. I see everything that passes...

I only hurt people because they keep getting in the way of me finding you.

- Tell her. - What am I, your advocate?

You are, starting now.

He's really very gentle and fuzzy.

We're becoming fast friends.

You folks are all insane.

Well, my sister's a ship. We had a complicated childhood.

Doesn't anybody care...

that I have a finely crafted gun pointed at this boy's head?

I care.

Then you gonna stop me from doing what I don't want to?

You gonna be smart here, River?

River?

Serenity?

What the hell's going on here?

I need you to do me a favor, captain.

There was a guy. He's very blurry.

You better be careful.

How come there's a guy onboard, and why are you all of a sudden the ship?

- I know you have questions. - That's why I just asked them.

But there isn't a lot of time, captain. I need you to trust me.

Am I dreaming?

We all are.

Don't make faces.

Are you ready?.

I just have to think here.

These older models have locators at all?

Won't help.

With the exception of one deadly midget, this girl is the smallest cargo...

I've ever had to transport, yet by far the most troublesome.

Does that seem right to you?

- What did he do? - Who?

The midget.

Arson.

Little man loved fire.

I can take this guy out.

He's faster than you. All of you. And he's wearing armor.

What about his face? Is his face wearing armor?

No touching guns.

It's soon now. Are you ready?.

- How do you know what he's gonna do? - I'm very close to him.

- He doesn't even see it. - Okay, but...

Go now!

You're not welcome here anymore, Early.

Do you think I'm gonna leave here empty-handed?

I know it.

Yeah, well, you know me real well.

Wish I didn't. You like to hurt folk.

It's part of the job.

It's why you took the job.

Power, control, pain.

Your mother knew.

Signed "the sinner" when she waved goodbye.

She's relieved.

Saw darkness in you.

You're not well.

You'll be wanting to shut up now.

Big Golden Retriever sitting on the lawn.

Never took to you.

Smelling you.

Your neighbor's pet.

You did things to him.

Cleaned up after.

Shined and polished.

Everything in here gleams.

Well, I'll be a son of a whore.

You're not in my gorram mind. You're on my gorram ship!

It's very interesting, all these buttons.

Okay. We're not touching those, okay?

- How'd she get on my ship? - Put the gun away.

Okay. I'm putting it away.

No, he's not.

I'm putting it away...

because we're all reasonable people.

Don't want to do anything rash...

fiddling with any dials.

You're not right, Early. You're not righteous.

- You've got issues. - No.

Or, yes. I could have that. You might have me figured out then.

Good job. I'm not 100 percent.

You talk too much.

I'm flawed in that way. I sometimes go on, it's been said.

It's okay, Early.

I'm going with you.

River, what are?

I don't belong. Dangerous, like you.

Can't be controlled. Can't be trusted.

Everyone can just go on without me and not have to worry.

People could be what they wanted to be...

could be with the people they wanted.

Could live simple.

No secrets.

No.

I'll be fine.

I'll be your bounty, Jubal Early.

And I'll just fade away.

Well, finally something goes according to...

Simon?

See? That's what it feels like.

Hang tight, darling. Early's on the move.

Shh. It's okay.

You made the right move, darling. Best of you to go with old Early.

You think so?

Some of us feel differently.

Permission to come aboard?

You know, you ain't quite right.

It's a popular theory.

Go on, get in there.

Give your brother a thrashing for messing up your plan.

He takes so much looking after.

To the left. Your left.

Okay, now, very gently, pull that aside.

This is really not my area of expertise, doctor.

I tend to be putting these into people more than the other thing.

Can I mop your brow? I'm at the ready with the fearsome brow mop.

You got the bullet.

Okay, I'm just gonna pass out for a minute, but you're doing great.

And we live to fight another day.

Any chance that [violent lunatic] might survive?

Air he had left, I'd say his chance would be about one in...

a very large number.

He knows that play.

How's your lip?

I just feel such a fool.

All them years of priest training, taken out by one bounty hunter.

Don't get me wrong. I gave him a hell of a fight.

Epic, I'm guessing.

They'll be poems and songs. Just you wait.

Least you got some play. I missed every damn thing.

And then his folks come by to fetch him...

and it turns out he's, like, 14 years old!

I mean, he must've been some kind of genetic experiment...

because I swear this guy was...

Oh, my daddy whupped me so hard.

One of fours. Let's see you match that.

I can win this.

I'm hearing a lot of talk there, genius. Come on. Show me what you got.

Yep. Here I am.